You are comrade gunner
And for once, in the moment of time you've been spending here in this strange land, you're having some fun.
Discord, despite his 'element of chaos' notion, had a pretty interesting way of causing wide-spread panic.
Of coruse, the fact he was insistent on nopony being hurt was something of a grace.
"OH what fun you humans have with these toys of yours, I don't even remeber the last time I've been able to enjoy SO much chaos without lifting a finger!"
He smirked
"DRIVER! take us over that fruit stand! lets spread some jam with these treads!"
"Davish comrader, v'e are vith you!" your driver spoke beside you in a rather confident boast of a voice.
You were all having fun, and no one was going to be losing much sleep over it.
Aside from Celestia perhaps, Discord said the only way to get her riled up was to hit something important.
"Ponyville is the best place to cause some grand ol'chaos! I remeber like it was yesterday when I made this place topsy turvey, it may not be the same as this, but this certainly takes the cake!" he said, suddenly eating a slice of cake upon his paw as he sat back and drank from a hovering fizzy drink through the craziest straw you've ever seen.
"GUNNER!" he barked as you turned your attention ahead.
"Yah comrade Discord?"
"Why don't we give these ponies a bit of a scare....lets paint the town blue!"
"blue?" You ask "how v'e do dat?"
Discord only grinned "trust me~" he said "i have ways of making things blue!" he snickered, coming out of his serious expression in a fit of chuckles.
You shrug, looking at your driver who sighs and shakes his head.
"Round up!" your loader calls as you sight a nearby building, level the gun.
BOOM!
The 120mm cannon lurches you tank backwards slightly as the round splats against the building in a big blue paint mark.
"Splendid!" Discord exclaimed "Simply spendid! I forgot you humans are quite ingenious with your designs, such sophsitication, ah, how I dreamed to bring such chaos with something like this...fire another!"
You obey without question, lining shots for the buildings of ponyville as round after round expelled from the barrel, splattering paint shot after paint shot across ponyville as Discord just laughed and laughed.
"Magnificent, you are a crack shot sir Gunner!"
You were about to move on when your tank suddenly comes to a lurching halt.
Discord, unexpecting the stop nearly topples over you as he flops about in his coils.
"what ho!" he exclaimed "Why did we stop?"
Your driver turned to Discord as he pointed forward.
"Dat is v'hy"
There...standing before you were six ponies.
among them were the two you first met, as well as four others, two pegasus, another pony, and another unicorn.
"OH bother...its THOSE six again..." Discord said, crossing his arms...and legs...and poofing away his cake and drink.
"Gentlemen, allow me to handle this, I know how these girls work. Mind the gun then, I have a special treat I wish for you to dispense when I give the word."
"So...we meet again golem!"
The purple mare barks, keeping her head down and her horn pointing at your tank.
"I guess I wasn't prepared before, but now, with my friends beside me, nothing will prevent me from figuring you-"
She paused, seeing the hatch atop it open as Discord popped out, resting his arms along the rim as he smirked.
"Well well well, if it isn't my most favored ponies in all of Equestria, how do you do girls, do you like my new wheels?"
"DISCORD!" The mare said "SO it was you behind this golem?"
"Oh pish posh, nay little fillie, I did not create this, I simply am...borrowing it...from its owner...and boy, do I sure enjoy what I can do with it! Such chaos to be had!"
Twilight was somewhat dumbfounded before regaining her composure.
"I'm not sure how you got free from the Celestial Prison, but we won't let you do what you did to Ponyville before!"
Discord simple smirked, slinking out and beside Twilight, gently running a paw along her chin.
"Oh come now, I mean no ill harm to any of you, whats the matter with having a little fun?"
"Its not safe all tel yah that, dat dere monster of yours is chewin up all the ground yah plowit over!" the orange pony said.
"Oh come now Applejack, you would be the last pony I'd expect to assume the worst of this, why, if you could ever so simply borrow this device, you could easily till so much of your land in half the time."
AJ wasn't too sure what he meant, but she huffed, not giving much inch to the silly dragon as Discord huffed.
"Always the hard nut to crack aren't you." he turned back to Twilight.
"I won't lie to you Twilight, it wasn't by my own power that freed me from my prison. This golem was so kind in doing that job for me that I just had to give it a chance to show me its stuff, and as you can see, its quite willing to cause just as much chaos as I wish to put about."
Twilight backed away, huffing "Be it you or that monster Discord, we won't let you continue your reign of terror."
Discord just laughed, wiggling back to the command hatch as he sat there.
"Awe, going to ruin my fun now are you? Fine, do what you see fit Twilight, I am...ready~" he said, almost too dramatically as he closed his eyes, seeing the mare charge up her horn and fire a bolt right towards the golem.
"Brace!" you bark as the magical bolt simply...bounces....right off your armour plates, defelcted off into the distance as Twilight just blinks.
"What...happened?"
Discord just starts to crack up.
"Oh haha you think it would be THAT easy, you silly fills haha you never cease to give me a good laugh!" he fell upon himself, feet and arms dangling out of the hatch.
Twilight simply stood there, stunned. One of her best magical attacks was simply...nullified...by the golem's hide.
It was...impossible!
How....unless...Discord had something to do with it.
"Alright girls...it seems we're going to have to do this the hard way!" she said, taking a step forward "Everyp0ny, get onto that golem!"
They all rush towards the tank.
"Now...gunner." Discord whispered as you depressed the barrel towards them and...
POOMF
Your first round hits Twilight dead on, but rather than paint...it was a giant ball of ice cream, sending the fillie splat into a wall as the frozen chocolate treat kept her placed tightly to the wall.
"W-what i-is this?" she asked as Pinkie hopped over, eying the ice cream and taking a big lick.
"OOOO its chocolate fudge ice cream!" she exclaims, bouncing around before turning to the golem.
"Do me, do me!" she cried, opening her mouth.
You shrug, pulling the trigger.
Vanillia ice-cream splatted into Pinkie, pinning her beside Twilight as she started to lick it madly
"Hrmmm so goood~" she said
Discord only grinned.
"Haha, oh you ponies are so sil-gack!"
"Gotcha partner!" AJ called as her rope landed right on the mid section of Discord, pulling him from the copula.
"Turn about, turn about!" he cried frantically as the turret turned, facing AJ now as the mare blinked in suprised.
"What in Tarnation?" she said before another shot sent her splat into a wall, pinning by a pink ball of ice-cream.
She licked it "Wha...Strawberry?"
Discord coughed, smirking before laughing "Haha, what were you expecting, Apple?" he said, just as Rainbow zipped by him.
"C'mon, get off your high horse and fight like a stallion!" she called, presenting her hoof-dukes to Discord as the dragon rolled his eyes.
"I think not, I am quite fine where I am." Discord responded as the tank began to reverse, turning its turret towards Dash.
Dash blinked "Hey, where you going?" she said, suddenly zipping after the tank just as it fired another ball of ice-cream towards her, but the ever-so-nimble Pegasus simply avoided it before stopping.
"Hah, that all you got?" she said as Discrod grinned, snapping his fingers.
That same ice-cream ball, still traveling at the same velocity suddenly appeared above Dash and fell downward upon her, slamming her right into the earth under a pile of mint chocloate-chip.
"Haha, I can't belive that work, you boys are simply spendid!" he said as you roll your eyes.
"I thought v'e v'ere going to rescue Kaptian..." you mutter as Discord slinks low.
"Now now, don't get your kinkers in a bunch comrade, we're just getting the stage set for the grand entance of-"
"This has gone on long enough!" came a powerful voice as the dragon turned to see a brilliant white mare landing some distance from the tank...and an all too familiar human easing off her back.
"KAPTIAN!?" the crew shouted as Kaptian stood beside Celestia, at ease as he eyed the tank.
"Comrades....its time to settle dis, v'once and for all." he muttered Celestia stepped forward, spreading and then folding her wings as her ever-flowing mane ebbed behind her.
"Discord I have come to settle matters with you... I cannot allow your reign of chaos to ensure, and have come to set a challenge to you, one that pits both our wits against one another, and one....that shall hold your fate, and the fate of Equestria."
Discord's ears perk as he smirks. "Well, this is a first Princess, betting the stakes of your kingdom now, my my...I'm surprised how much spine you suddenly started to show. Perhaps these...humans...aren't so bad for you afterall."
Celestia just keeps a straight face, passing a quick glance to her student before turning back to Discord.
"Are you willing to hear the terms of this match?" she asked as the dragon slipped from the tank with a smirk.
"Oh but of course Princess, lay them upon me."
You are Kaptian Anon
and you've just settled a tuckered out Luna to bed.
Strange, it felt almost...fatherly to tuck her away as per Celestia's request, she had gone outside to...contemplate...her next move.
She had s big problem on her hands...er...hooves.
A villain of hers driving around in a tank.
your tank to be exact
one that...apparently...had been upgraded by said villain and was now free to run amok on her realm.
Unpleasant, and certainly untactful for her, being an object not of this world and crewed by battle-harden soldiers.
You were partially to blame for this; your men's desire to free you had stirred a beast to manipulate them, and in turn free the beast "discord" from his prison.
Now, strong and armoured with a battle tank, he was coming to Canterlot to 'rescue' you.
More like causing chaos on the way from what you read on him.
As you leave Luna's room, you walk down the stairs, escrted by two of the Lunar princess's guards before turning to another pair of stairs and walking up, escorted by a pair of Solar guards.
You approch Celestia's room as you tap on the door; the hole from her horn mended without a scratch on it as it opened.
"Come..." the princess said as she stood at her balcony, looking over at Ponyville.
"Discord seems to have taken a liking to your toy Kaptian..." Celestia said, noting the dust billowing from Ponyville as she could imagine the dragons excitement for causing such pandemonium.
"He v'ill be fine..." you muttered "men know not to kill anyting, dey not have heart to."
"but I can't trust Discord to go easy on them either; he will continue to cause havoc weither they'd like to or not."
"Den...perhaps v'e approach him, and make him wager."
"Wager?" Celestia asked "what do you mean?"
"You goat him into challenge, v'e tips cales in favour, best him, and v'ind day, simple yah?"
Celestia looks at you, then back to Ponyville.
"Simple is putting it lightly, nothing ever is simple with Discord."
"Yah...but you forget, dey MY men driving dat ting...I'm sure v'e can figure someting out, but...you got to play warrior Princess to pull of."
Celestia looked back at you, her expression was concerning, uncertainty mixed with worry and a slight hint of dread, but beneath it all was a spirit, a shimmering glint of a warrior she was...and certainly something she'd have to draw upon in this dark hour.
--
"Oh but of course Princess, lay them upon me."
Celestia huffed "You...and your new toy, must drive from here to Canterlot at best speed while I shall attempt to impede your process."
"Is that all?" Discord said somewhat amused by the challenge "to simpy, drive back to where I began and make sure you don't stop me?"
"That is it exactly."
Discord frowned "I smell a catch..." he muttered as you stepped forward.
"She v'ill be aided by me comrade, and my men shall be aiding you." you smirk "Let us see if you are able to guide dem as well as I have. Also..." you add "V'e ill be given a half-hour grace to prepare, as your tank us upgraded and armoured, v'e are given chance to set our own impediments to your plan."
Discord eased back, finding his inquiry answered as he smirked, huffing, and then chuckled.
"I can agree to that, man versus machine, wit versus wit, oh how I love a one-sided game!" he chuckled as you looked at Celestia...and your men, looked at you.
You gave them a big grin, and for a moment, you could tell they were a bit further into what you had planned than the dragon was, and with some luck, might be able to win the day.
"Very well Princess, I shall agree to your terms."
"Wonderful...then we commence the game upon half past the hour."
Discord smirked, easing back into the coupla "Such is the folley of waiting hrmm, but I see no reason in you trying to hold me back, its obvious I can just as easily best this little game without worry." he smirked, getting comfortable as you looked at Celestia.
"Come Kaptian, we have much work to do."
You are comrade gunner, and you're waiting to get the show on the road.
Discord sat unamused in the command copula for a good 20 minutes before he got bored, he would continuously slip out and back into the tank, obviously trying to spot what Celestia and that human were planning.
"I don't see v'hats so difficult..."
You mutter as you check your gunnery dials "I mean, tis straight path to Canterlot from here yah?"
Discord only huffed "for a simple mind yes, but knowing Celestia and your Kaptian, I'm sure they are plotting the ultimate demise for us."
"Dat not good..." your driver muttered "hope dey do not try and disable tank..."
"Nonsense!" Discord assured as he smirks "This bad boy is protected with only the best magical defense, I'm sure even Celestia's own might couldn't stop it."
The driver gives a grin, but he looks at you, his eyes betraying his confidence.
"Comrade Kaptian is going to be planning v'ell, he grew up in tanks...dis not easy."
You lean over "Yah...but I rader let him v'in den v'atch us help dis v;one." you mutter, motioning to Discord as he had sat back, sipping that fizzy drink of his.
Your gunner looks over, then back, nodding in approval.
"Let us hope comrade Kaptian knows v'hat to do, dis not easy fight for any of us."
-
You are comrade Kaptian
and you had to admit, for a Princess, Celestia had a very devious mind to plot the upheaval of an armoured vehicle.
For the past 20 minutes, she had flown you down and back on the path between Canterlot and Ponyville. Normally it was almost a days worth of travel, but with an armoured vehicle that could reach almost 70 km/hr, it would be much less than that, perhaps at least a few hours.
As you flew, you had marked locations along the main road to erect 'tank traps' - concrete and stone obstacles to impeded its movements, as well as pit-falls.
"V'e have come from v'ar v'ere opposing force lacked armour as v'e posses, instead, dey rely on tactics and traps to hinder us."
Celestia wasn't too sure about your ideas on stopping that armoured behemoth.
To her, especially with Discord at the controls, she felt it was almost impossible to challenge such a power.
You however, had other thoughts in your mind.
"I have learnt many v'ays dat tanks are not invincible, dey have flaws, and best way to exploit dem is to know dem."
"Oh?" Celestia said as you started your return flight to Ponyville.
"Dah...for example, tanks are heavy, meaning dey slow in think mud, dey also lack ability to be manuverable in tight spaces and...unlike oder vehicles, are cumbersome and difficult to control on rough ground."
You waggle a finger "if v'e can exploit basics flaws, sure v'e can manage to even odds, if not by much."
"So what would you propose be the best method then?"
You grin as Celestia touches down outside of Ponyville, letting you slip off her back.
"V'e try leading tank into woods, block main road, and let nature handle it."
Celestia only blinked, considering that beast had done so much out in the open, her thoughts worried on how efficient it would really be in the woods.
The first time the tank faced her, she was surprised how difficult it was to spot and how easily it made its way about the mountain.
Putting her faith in Kaptian Anon was all she could hope for against that monstrosity as they touched down before the tank.
"Discord!" Celestia called as the dragon eased out of the hatch.
"Oh yes your humble majesty?" he said jokingly as Celestia gave a huff.
"Your time is now, you may begin!" she said
"And not a moment too soon! ONWARD!" he called as the tank raced past Celestia on out towards the main road.
"I hope you're able to handle this..." she thought as she watched the dust billow from behind before she too took flight.
You are comrade Gunner
and something doesn't look right.
You got out too easy from village and now you're taking steady path down main road.
Part of you buzzed with concern, the same 'tankers gut' feeling your crew had if something was a miss, and surely, something wasn't right about the 'calmness' of the moment.
Discord of course just looked out the command copula, sunbathing himself with sunglasses and a reflective screen as you look ahead, suddenly seeing a tree tilt over and slam ahead of the tank.
"CYJOT!" your driver shouts, suddenly slamming the tank to a halt as Discord fell forward right out of the copula and slammed face first into the tree.
"Ugh`' he muttered, slowly lifting his face from the turn
"Who put these there?" he said, huffing as he looked at them.
"It seems comrade Kaptian had begun to lay traps.'
"Hrmph! Spoil sport" discord muttered as he snapped his fingers, causing the trees to stand upright and fix themselves into the woods.
"Onward driver!" discord shouted as the tank began to move again.
--
"Hrmmm, he's good..." Comrade Kaptian muttered as Celestia touched down beside him.
"It didn't work, did it?" Celestia asked as she smirked.
"Yah, he poofed trees a'vay...."
"Well...perhaps we need a different method."
"What do you suggest?"
Celestia grinned "He did say the tank was immune to magic right?"
"Dah..."
"Then perhaps if we may it impossible for them to advance with the use of magic...we could make them find another path?"
Kaptian blinked.
"How do v'e do dat?"
Celestia gleamed, her horn brilliance as she looked ahead, suddenly causing a massive quake to begin as the road ahead of the tank suddenly opens into a canyon.
"Like so."
-
Discord blinks in surprise as the road opens up, huffing as he loomed over the canyon.
"Oh do go on Celestia, do you think this little trick will work?" he said aloud as he snapped his fingers...only to find that he had been the only one to teleport to the other side.
"What?" He exclaimed, teleporting back. "Whats going on here?"
He snapped his fingers again, only to teleport himself yet again to the other side before he returned
"What is wrong with this thing?" he exclaimed, looking at his fingers.
"You made tank magic resistant..." your loader mutters "it v'ont be affected by magic."
"ARGH!" Discord says, huffing with a fit. "Fine then, we do this the hard way...Driver, get us around this canyon!"
"Dah!" your driver mutters as he turns the tank and starts plowing it right into the woods.
You smirk, watching with Celestia as the mare lets out a soft giggle.
"I must say, this is starting to be worlds of fun! I have yet to have such a pleasurable time in ages!"
You chuckled, you were glad she was having some fun as you ease out from the brush.
"Alright, their going into the woods now, v'e better get above dem to track progress."
Celestia nodded, easing her behind before you.
"Then climb aboard Kaptian, we must make haste!"
-
You are comrade gunner, and you have a rather big grin on your face.
You knew Kaptian had many tricks up his sleeve, and fact he had magical princess pony with him made this a rather fair fight.
Discord crossed his arms, he wasn't too fond of traveling slowly through the brush.
It wasn't your fault that your off-road speed was reduced to only 50 km/hr, and the fact the woods this far from Ponyville were thicker made it no easy task to avoid the massive oak and red-woods.
"Can we make this go any faster?" Discord muttered "I swear this is such unbecoming of a nemesis to travel this slow about his path of chaos, not even a single house to play around with." he sat back against the rim.
"And here I thought we'd be in Canterlot within the hour."
"Leave it to comrade Kaptian to find other means to impeded us." you mutter as Discord eyed you.
"More like Celestia, oh she's always been a thorn in my side ever since we met."
Discord sighed, slowly slinking back into the tank.
"It was a couple thousand years or so ago when I first met the Celestial princess..." he droned on as you could see the world become wavy lines as a flashback took the scene of a young looking Discord and a young Celestia, her pink mane replacing her multi-coloured on.
"I had met Celestia back when she was only a young filly, and she certainly was the most beautiful filly there ever was. I had tried many times to attract her attention, to show my desire for her, but..." he sighed "her parents weren't too fond of a chimera dragon trying to nestle with their daughter. Her peers ridiculed me for how I looked, but she....she had the heart that no other could contend...and for awhile...I thought she and I would become something." he paused "but...after tremendous pressure from her peers and her parents...it became nothing but a dream."
Poof....the flash back vanishes as Discord sighs, lowering his head while he held a figure of Celestia in a paw.
"I had commit myself to chaos after that wanting nothing more than to show my desire in my own way to her, but...as you could have guessed, that didn't end well..."
He huffed, tossing it away as he suddenly smirked, showing a renewed vigour about him.
"But, that was then and this is now, so let us put away the unhappiness and start focusing on creating some good old fashioned chaos!"
Even a crazy dragon certainly has some soft points as you continue forward, slowly trudging through trees as the tank suddenly lurches to the right, as though all power to the left tread had went dead as the tank turned, and the grinding noise of something blocking the other track echoed along the left side of the tank.
"What is it now?" Discord said, having taken a bit of a shaking to the tanks sudden yawn to the right, finding some discomfort that he flopped abit in place; a displeased look on his face as your driver comes to a halt.
"Dere is someting v'ong with track, something must have jammed into track component and bloked movement, v'e better go check before v'e end up breaking tank."
Discord looked displeased, leanng over.
"Well, what are you waiting for, go fix it!"
The driver nods, slowly opening his hatch as he slid out of the tank.
"Delays...delays..." Discord muttered.