Integration

by Raugos


Chapter 9

Six months before Integration…

“Come on, grab my hoof and jump!” Sash growled as she hovered outside the window.

“But it’s so high. Are you sure you can even get any of us to the ground? What if you drop me?” the unicorn mare protested weakly as she stared out the window, at the streets of Canterlot far below. She then backed away and looked at everypony else for help. “And why do I have to be the first to jump? Can’t somepony else go first?”

“Ugh,” Sash groaned in exasperation. “Look, the guards are busy fighting the changelings and the stairways are all blocked, so unless you want to try your luck getting through them, the window’s the only way out of the palace. Now jump!”

The mare only continued to look around fearfully.

Come on, don’t take all day. They’re coming! Caramel peeped into the corridor from the room that they were hiding in and hastily withdrew when he saw one of the black bug-ponies buzz into another room up ahead. He listened intently for the sound of anything approaching, and when he was certain that nothing was coming after them, he left his post and hurried over to the window where the six other wedding guests were milling about.

After the ugly queen thing had knocked out Princess Celestia, most of the guests had scattered. Lucky and the rest of his friends had fled through a different corridor, and Caramel and his small group had so far been fortunate enough to avoid the swarm that had entered through the Great Hall’s windows. They’d avoided all the skirmishes between the guards and bugs at the exits, but they now had nowhere else to go. Except out the window.

This is crazy. What did that thing do to Shining Armour?

If the Princess and the Captain of the Royal Guard had fallen to her so easily, regular ponies like him and Sash stood no chance. And they weren’t going to stick around to find out what happens after that. Best to leave the fighting to the professionals. Caramel shouldered his way past the others and placed both fore-hooves on the sill. Looking back at them, he said, “Fine, I’ll go first; she knows what she’s doing.” He then clambered up to stand precariously on the edge.

Sash hovered close and grabbed him with both forelegs. He felt a split-second of vertigo as she pulled him over the edge and reflexively hugged her tight as his hind legs dangled over empty space.

“Not so tight—need to breathe,” she cautioned.

He relaxed a bit. Looking over Sash’s shoulder and past her flapping wings, he could see the chaos spreading in the city below. Black clusters of changelings were swarming through the streets, clashing with packs of gold and white guards. Regular ponies were running everywhere in confusion. He could hear screams rising up from below, along with the sounds of brawling.

“Okay, I’m taking him down and coming back in twenty seconds, so you guys had better form a line real quick,” Sash instructed those still inside. “The longer you take to decide, the greater the chance one of those things is going to find you. See you in a bit!”

With that said, Sash went into a rapid, tight spiral down to the streets. The wind whistled in his ears and tousled his mane as the ground drew closer. But just before they landed, Sash suddenly gasped, and he felt her pulse quicken to an alarming pace. She dropped him, but they were close enough to the ground that he was only lightly bruised after landing and rolling to disperse his momentum. Sash herself tumbled into a wide stance, wings twitching. She looked like she was trying not to snarl or something; her teeth were showing and her nose was half-wrinkled.

“Uh, Sash? Are you okay?” he asked, hesitantly tapping her shoulder.

Upon contact, she started rather violently and shook her head, taking in slow, deep breaths. For a moment, Caramel thought something was off about the colour of her eyes, but then she blinked and he saw that they were their usual amber.

That’s weird... “What on earth was that?”

She rubbed her forehead and said, “Nothing. I’ve got to get the others down. Go hide and wait.” And she took off without another word.

“Hurry!” he called up, and mentally berated himself for being stupid. The last thing they needed was a shout drawing attention to them. So he made a quick dash to the shop-house nearby and hid in its back alley.

When Sash brought down her next passenger, he quickly caught her attention with a short, sharp whistle and beckoned them over. Sash nudged her stallion passenger towards him and immediately flew up again for the next. The unicorn looked at him hesitantly, then shook his head and galloped down the street, heading straight for the nearest gate out of Canterlot.

Caramel couldn’t fault him for running away – he probably would’ve done the same if Sash wasn’t staying behind to help the others out of the palace. They longer they stayed in one place, the greater the chance of being found. The bugs were raining down into the city like shooting stars.

As it turned out, none of the others wanted to wait for Sash to finish ferrying everypony out either. Only the last one, an earth stallion whose name he vaguely remembered as Tinsel or something similar, actually chose to stick with them. Safety in numbers, and all that.

“What do we do now?” Caramel asked. They were partially obscured from the flying changelings by the shadows thrown over them by the two-storey shop, but it would do little good if any of them actually were on the ground. And given the way those things were crash-landing all over the city, it was probably only a matter of time before one landed nearby.

The sound of shattering glass was his answer. He turned and saw that one of the windows of the shop was lying scattered in a thousand pieces, and their companion had already leaped in.

“Come on!” Tinsel urged. “We can hide in the cellar until this all blows over. Give the guards time to do their jobs. The Elements of Harmony should be on their way!”

Caramel didn’t really like the idea of hiding, much less in a shop that they’d technically just broken into. But before he could answer, Sash zipped up to the roof and dropped back down almost immediately.

“Probably a good idea,” she conceded as she shooed Caramel into the building. “There’s way too many of them around town now. We’d be seen if we tried to make a run for it.”

“And if they come in for us? We’d be trapped.” Caramel nudged the shards of broken glass at his hooves. “And… we’ve kind of already marked the building for them.”

“Do what you want. I’m hiding,” Tinsel announced, and he disappeared down into the shop’s cellar.

Caramel looked at Sash. She seemed as bewildered as he was.

“You know, if you flew fast enough you could just—”

Sash frowned and swept aside his suggestion with a quick flick of her wing. “Shush! Don’t even finish that. We’re getting out of this together or not at all.”

Her tone left no room for argument, no matter how much he would have liked her to get to safety first. And a changeling crashing into the street just a block away convinced him that they were pretty much out of options. So they both followed their companion down the cold steps and into the dark.

The minutes ticked by as they huddled together in the darkness. They could hear the screams and clashes outside. Eventually, the sounds became less frequent, but louder. They were coming closer. When Caramel had estimated that roughly half an hour had passed since their escape from the palace, he heard the sound of crunching glass.

Guess it was just a matter of time.

He felt an unnerving tingle creep up his spine. They’d not barricaded the door for fear of being sealed in complete darkness, but now that decision was starting to seem like a big mistake. Hoofsteps thumped on the floorboards as the creature explored the deserted shop. The unlocked door would be a dead giveaway.

The three of them shuffled behind the boxes and other odds and ends that were stored below. From the sounds above, the changeling seemed to be alone. Jumping on it and incapacitating it before it could get help would probably be the best thing to do. So they waited. The wooden steps creaked as the changeling trotted down. Caramel didn’t dare peep out, but he knew exactly when they needed to make their move. His heart pounded in his chest as he anxiously fiddled with the dusty rags he’d found lying on top of the boxes.

As soon as its hooves clopped on the stone floor, he shouted, “Now!” and leaped out of cover and charged the same time as Sash and Tinsel did. The changeling screeched in surprise as all three of them fell upon it like a pack of wolves. Sash leaped and tackled it whilst Caramel and Tinsel rushed to restrain its hooves. He grunted and narrowed his eyes as its wings buzzed in his face. When its horn glowed green, Sash quickly slapped it with a hoof to make the spell fizzle out and promptly sat on top of its chest to stop it from getting up. It hissed angrily, and Caramel quickly brought some of the rags he’d found and gagged it. Sash and Tinsel worked on binding its legs and wings, and once it was trussed up good and proper, they headed up and shut it in the cellar.

“What now?” he asked just before they stepped out.

Sash hopped out and took to the air, disappearing from view. A few seconds later, she came back down and said, “I can see farther. I’ll try to find us a clear path to the gate.”

“Lead on, ma’am,” said Tinsel.

No sooner had they left the building than a pair of changelings came galloping round the shop’s corner. Their buzzing and chitters stopped when they saw them. They seemed rather surprised, and it took Caramel a moment to realise that they were looking rather intently at Sash as she stood between them and him.

One of them gave a chirp that sounded almost like a question.

What they hay is going on?

“Caramel, run!” Sash hissed.

Before he could process what was said, she’d already charged and rammed into the nearest of the two changelings. He heard Tinsel whirl round and gallop off. The second changeling seemed stunned by Sash’s boldness as it watched her grapple with its companion on the pavement, but soon turned its attention to Caramel instead. It bared its fangs and hissed.

Not good!

Caramel was just only able to twist aside to avoid its lunge, and was grazed on his shoulder by one of its legs as it went past him. It left a wad of sticky green stuff on his coat. He tried to buck the creature, but his aim was wild and he only succeeded in setting himself up for another attack. The thing came at him from the side with frightening speed and tackled him to the ground.

With all his breath knocked out of him, he was barely able to put up a fight. The changeling smeared on him more of the green stuff that came oozing out of the holes in its legs, and it felt like he was being covered in cold, sticky syrup. It made a mistake, though. He did manage roll onto his back and get his hind hooves under the creature’s belly at one point, and quickly bucked it off. But when he tried to rise, he found that the green stuff had stuck fast to the ground. It stretched a bit, but quickly snapped back to its original shape and held him fast. A second later, the changeling came back, grinning.

“What did we ever do to you?” he cried out in panic.

It didn’t answer. Instead, there was a bright flash of green light behind it, followed by a shriek and the sound of shattering glass. The changeling standing over him whirled around…

“Get away from him!” he heard Sash bellow.

There was another blinding green blast, and the changeling sailed right over him. He heard a crunchy smack as it collided with a building. Though he was plastered to the cobblestones, he managed to turn his head just enough to see it peel off the wall and collapse to the ground with a dazed expression on its face, wings twitching feebly. It had left an outline of its body on the scorched wall.

“Are you… okay?” Sash panted. She was standing over him, and there were several cuts and bruises on her body. But that wasn’t Caramel’s main concern. He blinked once. Then twice. Then twice again for good measure. Sash had a horn, and it was still glowing green. And it wasn’t turquoise like her coat—it was black, curved and sharp.

“Uh, Sash…” He had absolutely no idea how to begin.

She shifted uncomfortably and sighed. “Yeah, I’ve got a bit of explaining to do. Can I ask you to wait until we’re at least out—”

A whooshing sound cut her off. He turned and saw a bright, pinkish-purple globe rapidly expanding outward from the palace. It only took a few seconds to reach them, and Caramel felt it wash over him like a warm shower. He also heard what sounded like somepony getting smacked in the face with a rolled-up newspaper and a muted yelp of surprise. Once the purple globe had expanded until it had exceeded the size of the city, it dissipated into thin air. Caramel found that the sticky gunk holding him had shrivelled up and crumbled away, and he was free to move again.

He could hear cheering in streets as ponies pranced around in joy, having been freed from their bonds just like he’d been. When he looked up, the sky was absolutely clear. The vicious changelings were all gone.

And so was Sassaflash.

* * * * *

Fourteen days before Integration…

It turned out that changelings could function for a remarkably long time without sleep. Skipping out on it for four days straight was unpleasant for Caramel, but he could still go about his daily routine without shambling around and moaning like a zombie. He actually wanted to do just that, though it was entirely for different reasons.

Joining the changelings had a far heavier price than he’d anticipated. He might have been able to fool himself for a while into thinking of it as some adventure straight out of a Daring Do novel, where all sorts of crazy stuff happened but nopony got seriously hurt in the end. But now, he was neck-deep in this mess and he couldn’t see any way out of it short of starting a rebellion. Which, given what he’d experienced in his recent attempt to disobey Chrysalis, was going to be a ridiculously stupid idea. And to top it all off, at least one of the Princesses was aware of the situation. That was the main reason he was avoiding sleep.

She’ll be waiting for me…

Caramel was afraid. Afraid of what Princess Luna might think of him if he told her the truth. And lying was out of the question. He wasn’t sure if that was possible in a dream, or if she’d be able to see right through him if he tried. Would she hold him responsible for what had happened to Lucky and the others? After all, it was starting to look like they’d come out here only because they were looking for him. And instead of freeing them, he’d actually leeched on Lucky. And that was before adding the fact that he looked like some ugly cross between a pony and a bug.

And he knew that they were just excuses. One way or another, he would need to sleep soon, and the Princess of the Night would find him. It was like trying to hide from Miss Cheerilee after doing something that he knew was wrong. The longer he waited, the more cross she would be with him, and the less he wanted to fess up.

Argh! He wanted to shout in frustration, but kept his mouth shut to avoid disturbing his neighbours. The resting period for this cycle wasn’t over yet. Slowly, he settled back into the blankness that he’d grown accustomed to in the past few days. It was a kind of dormancy that wasn’t quite sleep, but it still allowed him to feel some measure of rest. It was like daydreaming, without the thinking bit, and it made time pass faster. One moment he’d be lying on the ground, staring blankly into the darkness, and the next he’d realise that a substantial amount of time had gone by.

A small nudge shook him out of his dormancy. Caramel blinked and found Sash waving a hoof in his face.

“Caramel, I’m getting really worried about you. Are you zoning out like this every day?” she asked.

He sat up and rubbed his eyes. Now that he’d thought of it, he remembered seeing Sash trotting over to him and asking him something, but he’d simply not responded at the time. “I’m fine,” he said. “I just had a long day.”

Sash crossed her holey forelegs. “Yeah, I’m not buying that. Remember what I said about not beating yourself up too much over what happened? Well, I hate to say it, but you’re being way too hard on yourself right now. And…” She peered at him closely, “—are you losing sleep? You look a mess.”

“I’m okay, really,” he lied.

Sash gave him a look.

Caramel kept eye contact for a few moments, but eventually wilted under the gaze of her unblinking eyes. “All right, fine—I’m not okay. Are you happy now?”

“Talk to me, then. Don’t let it eat you up from the inside. I know you’ve been avoiding everyone—”

“Hey, I’m not avoiding anyone,” he interrupted, “Where I work and sleep is no secret, and I’ve not changed my schedule.”

Sash frowned. “Not the point—you’re not talking to anyone. And by that I mean dealing with what’s happening. It looks like you’re just trying to sweep everything under the rug and hoping that it will go away if nopony mentions it.”

Caramel raised a hoof to stall her. They were already starting to raise their voices. “Can we please take this somewhere else?” He nodded towards the changelings hanging from the ceiling nearby. “These guys are still sleeping, you know.”

She shrugged. “Lead the way.”

Caramel led her through the tunnels, only paying half his attention to where he was going. After a while, he realised that he’d gone to one of the water reservoirs. Must be thirsty. Wordlessly, he climbed down to the water mark and drank several mouthfuls. It was more than he needed, but he enjoyed the wetness in his mouth. There was more water than anyone needed at the moment, and most of it would seep into the rock before they could finish it, anyway.

After his long drink, he clambered back to the top of the pit and sat on the edge. Sash settled down next to him, and all was quiet for the next few minutes, save for the endless dripping of water from the ceiling directly above the reservoir.

“What do you think will happen if I went back to Ponyville like this?” he asked.

Sash opened her mouth to answer, but stalled for several seconds. After a while, she hesitantly said, “Caramel, I don’t think that’s a very healthy train of thought.”

“You told me to talk. That’s what I’m doing. I can’t stop thinking about what I could’ve done differently. What I should have done differently.”

Sassaflash frowned. She spoke slowly, as if she was choosing her words with great care. “If you ask me, I don’t think there’s much that you could’ve done to change how that turned out. I believe Chrysalis wants you to experience every part of life down here, and no matter what you did, it would eventually involve teaching you how to… feed. And, well… you know how hard it is to say no to her.”

“I could’ve fought harder—”

“Caramel, you were badly injured. The changeling part of you wouldn’t have let you pass on the best chance to heal your body, even if you managed refuse her. Between your new instincts and Mother’s force of will, anypony would have done the same in your place.” She then placed a hoof reassuringly on his shoulder. “The only ones I can think of who might’ve been able to resist are the Princesses and maybe the Bearers of the Elements, and you know that we can’t all be as strong as they are.”

“But… Tibia mentioned that some changelings have refused to come back to the hive. How did they manage that?”

“It’s easier to disobey when you’re far from the hive. You, on the other hoof, were getting direct orders from the queen, face to face.”

Caramel fell silent.

“It wasn’t your fault, and there’s nothing you could’ve done to avoid it.” Sash paused, then hesitantly added, “Unless you chose not to come here…”

No. Caramel turned to face her and held her with both forelegs. “Please don’t say that. After what I’ve seen, there’s no way I’m leaving you alone in this place. You’re my friend, you’re my special somepony, and I… I love you. I would do everything I can to make you happy.” He then winced and looked away. “Ugh, that came out really cheesy.”

“Doesn’t make it any less meaningful to me.” Sash leaned in and nuzzled him on the cheek. “I love you too, Caramel.”

And she really meant it. Caramel could feel her love pouring out like a river, and it was with some measure of guilt that he soaked it in. But there was an undercurrent of anxiety and guilt in her emotions as well, and he realised that Sash was hurting on the inside as well; she was just much better at hiding it. And here he was, being all mopey and useless when she seemed like she needed somepony to talk to as much as he did. She truly did feel bad for capturing Lucky and Cherry.

Time to stop feeling sorry for yourself, mister.

He hugged her tight and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For what I said to you about our friends. I… don’t blame you for doing what you were ordered to. I’m sorry for acting like I’m the only one in here who’s having a hard time. I know that you wouldn’t hurt anypony by choice.”

Sash’s ears drooped a bit as she looked away. After a moment of silence, she sighed and gave him a small smile. “Thanks. I think I needed that.”

They sat together in companionable silence after that. Caramel was content to simply be with her, even if they were only watching water drip into the pit. It reminded him of the times when they would sit atop the hill overlooking Ponyville and just while away the afternoon in the sun. For a moment, he could almost believe it to be exactly that.

After a while, Caramel realised that they weren’t the only ones in the reservoir. He twisted around when he heard a pair of voices arguing. They were coming from the single tunnel behind them, and he could see the shadows of their owners moving at the far end. One was significantly littler than the other.

“—told you, go back!”

That was definitely Rax’s voice. Caramel wasn’t surprised – he was practically his shadow at this point, so it made sense that he’d come looking for him after waking up. He was actually grateful that his friend and impromptu ‘supervisor’ was trying to give him some privacy instead of hovering closely when he was with Sash.

“Says you, not Mother. Where is he? Did he tell you to help him hide or something?”

Stickle? What’s he doing out of the hatchery?

“What’s with those two?” asked Sash.

He left her question hanging as he rose and trotted over to the two arguing changelings. Sash followed, and when he got to them, he saw that Rax had a hoof pressed down on Stickle’s tail, who was glaring at him stubbornly whilst trying to pull free.

“What’re you guys doing here?” Caramel asked.

Stickle nipped Rax’s foreleg, eliciting a yelp of surprise from his elder sibling before breaking loose and leaping onto Caramel’s back. “You haven’t been around for ages—we’ve been waiting forever,” he complained. “You promised!”

Uh oh. Caramel remembered now. Between the rigorous training in Warrior Caste and the recent clash with the diamond dogs, he’d not had much of an opportunity to do much for the nymphs back in Keeper Caste. He grinned apologetically. “Sorry, buddy. I’ve been really busy. But remember that time when—”

Stickle bounced on his back impatiently. “Yeah, yeah. You came back and shared some love and all that. But you didn’t tell any stories. We want to hear more about Commander Hurricane or Captain Blizzard! Or you can tell us about what you did when you fought the diamond dogs!”

“Oh, sure, the pony gets to be the hero. As if he was the only one fighting…” Rax muttered.

“Why, are you jealous?” asked Stickle with a smug grin. “Mite and Pith think that the reason you follow him around everywhere is because you want to be more like him. You want to be his sidekick, don’t you?”

Rax’s left eye twitched. He trotted closer, and Caramel nervously took a step back. His friend looked quite ready to pounce on the little blabbermouth sitting on his back.

When he was about a tail-length away, Rax stopped and narrowed his eyes at Stickle. “Oh, really? And no one told you little grubs that it’s because he needs someone to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid? Or watch his back? He has terrible spatial awareness, you know. Heh heh.”

Thanks, buddy. You’re such a supportive guy...

Caramel felt Stickle prod the back of his neck with a hoof. “Come on; show him how wrong he is!”

This was rapidly getting out of hoof. Having the nymphs idolising ponies and him like that probably wouldn’t sit very well with Chrysalis when she found out. If she hadn’t already. Even if he didn’t have a psychopathic changeling for a queen who might disapprove, nothing good ever came out of that kind of hero worship. Even foals were sometimes told not to expect miracles from the Princesses. He just needed to figure out a way to placate both Stickle and Rax…

Sash chuckled. “You boys are cute when you’re arguing. Well, I’ll leave you to it—I’ve got work to do.” As she trotted past, she gave him a quick peck on the cheek. “See you later.”

Rax stared after her. “That’s just… eww.”

Caramel frowned. “I thought that’s kind of the job and goal of all changelings. Never seen anyone give a kiss before?”

His friend snorted. “Of course I have. But she meant it. It’s freaky.”

“I don’t see what’s wrong. That love looked delicious to me,” Stickle piped up.

Caramel scratched his head. Apparently, for all his experience as a warrior, in pony terms, Rax was way behind in appreciating sincere affection simply because it existed and not because it was nourishing.

On the plus side, though, it had served as a distraction. Caramel decided to make the most of it and steer the conversation away from their previous argument.

“Stickle, did you sneak out of the hatchery?” he asked.

“Nope.” Stickle suddenly seemed very interested in inspecting the patterns of rock on the floor.

“Eye contact, grub. Don’t look away,” Rax advised.

Caramel didn’t know whether he should be proud of Rax for acting like big brother or horrified at the fact that he was teaching Stickle how to be a better liar. Sure, lying was an important part of their feeding habits, but still…

“You should go back. The overseer would be worried about you,” he said, giving him a nudge towards the exit. “You’re not supposed to be down here, anyway.”

Boom.

Stickle resisted. “Wait, when are you coming to see us again?”

Boom.

“Maybe after sentry duty, okay?” Caramel said, frowning as he looked around.

“But—”

“Quiet!” Rax snapped, effectively silencing his little brother.

Now that nopony was speaking, Caramel became aware of a constant rumble, punctuated every now and then by a dull, booming sort of crash. It was a familiar sound—the movements of quarray eels deep below had always been audible from almost any part of the hive, to the point where he could pretty much filter out their comings and goings as typical background noise in his everyday life. But this time, the noise was near-constant and significantly louder. He turned to Rax, and his tense posture and urgent expression was all he needed to realise that this was the one, almost-forgotten thing that he’d been dreading since his transfer to Warrior Caste.

Now, of all times.

“Is that what I think it is?” Stickle asked.

“Yes, now get lost and let the grown-ups get to work,” Rax replied.

His words had the opposite effect on Stickle, though, for he bounced on all fours and cried, “I want to see this!”

Caramel stepped in before things got out of hoof. “Stickle, I need you to go home now,” he urged, trying to keep his voice from quivering. “This isn’t something you’d want to see.”

Boom. This time, the ground trembled slightly. Water droplets rained from the ceiling.

Stickle was still inclined to be stubborn, though. “Come on, I’m already out here. Can’t I—”

Boom. Caramel remembered the sickening crunch when the diamond dog’s club struck Chitin’s head. He remembered the sight of claws slashing through carapace and flesh. He remembered the smears of blood on the ground. And that was probably only a fraction of what the sounds he was hearing now promised. That was not something he would wish on anypony, least of all his foster siblings.

He rounded on Stickle and put on his sternest expression. “No. This is not a game. Get back to the hatchery and stay with the grown-ups.”

“But you are a grown-up!”

“In the hatchery. Quit dawdling!”

Stickle opened his mouth to argue, but Caramel looked him in the eyes, fiercely shook his head and jabbed a hoof towards the exit. “That’s an order, Stickle. If you ever want to be a royal guard, you’d better learn to act like one!” he growled.

He could feel a spark of hurt and resentment as Stickle gave him a reproachful look, but he knew that it was the right thing to do. After he was satisfied that he’d really gone and wasn’t trying to follow, Caramel turned to Rax and saw that he was already rushing off. He broke into a gallop after him as his mind wrestled with what he was hearing and what he’d been taught about quarray eels.

Too close. There was an eel boring its way into the hive nearby, and it sounded like it was coming from above. He’d learned that most encounters were in the larger shafts below, which Builder Caste had sealed off with their mixture of rock and resin. It was easier for the eels to come up from there using the natural caves and shafts, whereas the earth surrounding the main parts of the hive was mostly solid rock. Mostly.

The rumbling got louder as they went higher, until they were almost level with the hatchery. Caramel and Rax were amongst the first from Warrior Caste to reach where the rumbling was loudest—a small, disused natural chamber which sloped and narrowed into a little fissure in the floor, into which a small stream of runoff from the surface was flowing. Every now and then, the water would bubble and spurt back out from the fissure as air was forced through, accompanied by a loud hiss and more rumbling from the earth.

“What now?” he asked.

Rax took a few steps back. “Wait for the others.”

It didn’t take long for Overseer Skeehar and more of their caste-mates to arrive. There was only enough room in the chamber for eight or so changelings, even with half of them clinging to the walls or ceiling, so most of the reinforcements had to wait in the main tunnels.

“Alright, grubs, to your posts! You should know what to do by now!” Skeehar shouted as she barged to the front. The best magic users were always sent ahead to deter anything that tried to get through, and although Caramel was nowhere near as good with magic as some of his peers, he made up for it with his considerable reserves acquired from his relationship with Sassaflash. The others would wait outside the chamber, ready to jump into the fight if anything made it past them.

There was a thunderous crash as he took his spot on the ceiling, and everything shook. A guttural sound reached his ears—deep, resonant and hungry.

A quarray eel. He’d always wanted to see those in Ghastly Gorge—from a safe distance. And now he was going to meet one practically face to face. It’s funny how life likes to grant your wishes in the worst possible way…

Another crash shook the chamber, and water violently jetted out of the crack, drenching Skeehar and a few others who happened to be in the way. No one moved as the rock groaned and cracks branched out from the natural fissure. Water began to pool in the chamber as the only flow out was blocked by the creature on the other side of the cracks.

“Fire up!” Skeehar growled.

Caramel dug into his reserves and prepared to convert it into heat energy, and stopped just short of releasing it. The entire chamber was bathed in green light as their horns glowed with the fire just waiting to be unleashed. There was another impact on the other side of the fissure, and the cracks spread. The earth trembled with the movement of the creature. It sounded massive.

Beads of sweat trickled down Caramel’s head as the rock broke into chunks and bulged upward, sending a forth a wave of water that lapped at the hooves of those standing on the ground. Then, the tone of the rumbling changed. It became less like rock being crushed and more like bricks grinding against each other. The bulging rubble suddenly sagged and crumbled, and several chunks of it fell into the darkness as water and air was sucked back into the now gaping hole. With no luminous growths in the freshly dug tunnel, it was impossible to see what lay beyond.

“Wait for it to show its face!” Skeehar hissed.

Caramel suddenly realised that everything was quiet. There was no more rumbling—just the trickling of water, their breathing, and the steady hum of their readied spells. Somehow, that was even worse than the ominous rumbling. He knew that it was in there, it was just taking its sweet time to show itself. His nerves were already highly strung, and he could feel himself fidgeting in spite of his efforts to calmly wait as he’d been taught.

Knowing that the quarray eel was coming didn’t make it any less terrifying when it finally decided to attack. There was an explosion of dirt, rock and water, and as he raised a hoof to protect himself, he saw massive head burst into the chamber with blinding speed, jaws agape. He instantly released his blast of magic, and very nearly released his bladder’s contents as well. Unfortunately, fright had completely ruined his aim, and the blast struck plain rock.

Less unfortunately, though, the opening was still too narrow for the rest of the creature’s head, and its jaws snapped shut a full five tail-lengths away from them. Its eyes were yellow and relatively small, but they seemed to glow with predatory intelligence. It also had sharp fangs that protruded from its lower jaw, and Caramel had to stop himself from gagging when he breathed in the sour, earthy stench coming from its nostrils.

“Now, blast it!” Skeehar shouted.

It snapped its eyes shut as a half dozen or so bolts of fire struck its face, and it snarled and thrashed violently to get itself unstuck.

“Again!”

This time, Caramel’s aim was steady. Their fire struck it once more, and he saw the scorched remnants of scales peeling off from its face and snout. The narrow chamber shook as it wrenched its head free and rapidly slid back down into the darkness. He’d barely had enough time to sigh in relief when it surged up again, effectively shattering what was left of the barrier that was preventing it from entering the hive.

Oh, hayseed.

“Fall back!” Skeehar bellowed.

The others obeyed and hastily scrambled back up the tunnel towards the hatchery. Since Caramel, Rax and another warrior were at the forefront with the overseer, they kept up a steady barrage of fire bolts on the eel as it slithered towards them like a giant snake. They kept moving backwards as it advanced, and had to leap back every now and then when the eel surged forward and snapped its jaws.

“Tchaak!” Rax swore when it nearly took his snout off.

“Persistent grub,” Skeehar agreed.

They were steadily losing ground. In spite of the bleeding, smoking gashes on its snout and face, the eel just kept on coming, and their reserves of magic couldn’t last forever. If Caramel was already feeling the pinch, the others were almost certainly a few blasts away from running dry. One by one, their bolts grew feebler, until he and Skeehar were the only ones shooting. The eel took advantage of this, and they were forced back into the main tunnels where there was much more room for it to manoeuvre. It hissed and turned towards the tunnel leading into the hatchery.

It’s after the eggs, Caramel realised. Or the nymphs.

The wider tunnel did offer one advantage, though. The extra space meant that more changelings could engage the quarray, and that was exactly what Skeehar’s reserve fighters had been waiting for. They swarmed the eel, hacking and bashing it with weapons they’d seized from the diamond dogs and blasting it with fire whenever they managed to open a wound through its scales. Caramel continued to harry it with smaller, more economical blasts to its eyes which were meant to distract and irritate rather than do real harm. Running dry was the last thing he wanted to do, and besides, he was certain that Chrysalis was already on the way.

Sure enough, moments later he felt his blood rise with repressed violence. The eel, however, was far from defeated. Caramel estimated its full length to be at least seventy feet, and it thrashed violently whenever the others got close enough to attack it with their weapons, whether natural or scavenged. That made it extremely dangerous for anyone to try to get through the sections of the tunnel that it was occupying—they had to get to its front or back through quick detours through adjacent or parallel tunnels. For the most part, Caramel remained at its front to attack its more vulnerable spots.

“Keep it away from the eggs!” Skeehar shouted. “Hold it off until the queen arrives!”

They obeyed by clustering around the tunnels that led to the hatchery, forming a living barricade that spat sticky saliva and fired bolts of magic if the eel got too close. It snarled at them, but kept its distance. Every now and then, it would lunge and snap at them, and as one they would leap back to avoid its jaws, only to beat it back with hooves, clubs and magic. The rest of the warriors would also be attacking it from behind, and it would eventually retreat a bit to deal with them. It was a stalemate.

At least, until Chrysalis arrives. Caramel had to grin at the prospect of the queen giving it a good thrashing.

Then, a distant rumble caught his attention. It was coming from somewhere behind the eel. He could just glimpse the opening from which it had entered the hive, and his jaw dropped when he saw a second quarray slither in.

Oh, horse apples. Another one? His blood ran cold when he lost sight of it. The passage it had entered led upwards, which meant that it was heading to any one of three places: the fungus farms, the queen’s chamber, or the prison. And it didn’t take a genius to figure out which one it was probably most interested in.

Skeehar had seen it too. “After it! Keep it busy!” she roared at those harassing the first eel from behind. They quickly took off after it.

Lucky. Cherry Berry. I can’t stay here.

Caramel took a step towards one of the parallel tunnels that would let him get past the eel and chase after the second one. He couldn’t just leave his helpless friends there, not when there was a bloodthirsty quarray lurking around.

“What are you doing?” Rax hissed.

He turned and saw his friend’s suspicious frown. “Sorry. I can’t leave them,” he said, right before the eel lunged at them.

Everyone leaped back to avoid its jaws, but Caramel dodged to the side and ran sideways along the wall towards the parallel tunnel. The eel swung its head to the side and chomped down, and he felt a sharp tug on his tail as he dashed away. When he looked back, he saw that the end of his tail had been bitten clean off. Luckily, changeling tails were close enough to ponies’ that it was painless, and he managed to scramble into the safety of the narrower passage without further harm.

“Get back here!” he heard Skeehar shout. At the same time, he felt a pressure descend on his mind. His running slowed, and he felt a surge of guilt and dread for daring to disobey his commanding officer.

Oh, hayseed. She can do that too?

He gritted his teeth and stood still, resisting the urge to turn around. Then there came the all too familiar feeling that he was doing terrible things, like kicking colts and fillies aside because he wanted to get past them, or laughing at cripples and beggars. But at the same time, he realised that there was more at stake than his conscience. If the quarray got to the pods and managed to drag one all the way back to its nest, the kind of feeding that would ensue would be a lot less survivable than what changelings did to their captives. If he must trample on others to help protect those ponies, then so be it.

May you bugs rot in the deepest dungeons for making me do this, he thought with bitter tears as he injured and abused imaginary ponies in his mind. In the real world, he took one step forward. Then another. And another. With each step, the guilt and urge to turn back increased, but so did his resolve to not abandon his friends. If Chrysalis thinks joining the hive means I must forget all about what makes me a pony, then she can go stuff it up—

A shout and a crash interrupted his train of thought, right before something collided with him from behind. After stumbling a bit, he turned and saw Rax panting by his side.

“What’re you looking at? Move!” Rax hissed.

Caramel complied, but with the compulsion still weighing heavily on him, he was too slow for his liking. That’s when Rax started hustling him along like a prisoner being led to the torture chamber. Whenever he stalled, his friend would shove and bully him along until he started moving with appreciable speed. But once he’d put some distance between himself and the overseer, he gradually regained his composure.

“You do realise that we’re going to get our flanks cooked for insubordination, right?” Rax asked as they followed the trail of the second quarray.

“Yeah. Isn’t it fun?” Caramel deadpanned.

Rax snorted. “Wow, you pick the best times to grow a sense of humour.”

“Bite me.”

Shouts and screeching became audible as they approached the captive chamber. The earth rumbled, and a large shadow loomed at the last bend in the tunnel. If Caramel had ever wondered what standing in front of a train was like, he wouldn’t have been disappointed. He froze when he saw the massive eel surging towards him, and if it hadn’t been for Rax’s biting him on the mane and yanking him aside, he might’ve been squashed flat by its bulk and momentum. He pressed himself against the tunnel wall—there was just enough space in there that the quarray could go past them without grinding them to mushy bits against the rock, so long as it didn’t decide to throw its weight to the side or anything like that.

But just before it passed them, Caramel realised that the eel had two pods in tow, their torn ‘stalks’ firmly in its jaws as they bounced against the floor. That’s when he saw red. He broke into an all-out gallop after the quarray, with his heart pounding and his horn blazing with energy. He didn’t know if it was the combat pheromones finally getting to him, or it was because of the sight of two ponies being dragged to their doom—he only knew that this time, he would not fail anypony.

A second later, he heard the voices of other changelings from behind as the eel’s pursuers caught up.

Sassaflash was apparently amongst them. “Just let it go!” she shouted.

“Are you crazy?” he yelled without looking back. “They’re going to die!”

“There’s nothing we can do!”

No. You’re wrong! Caramel fired an intense blast at the fleeing eel and sheared off part of the fin on its spine, eliciting a pained snarl from it. He fired again and made a smoking gash on its side. He blinked furiously as bits of ash, burnt scale and foul smoke got into his eyes. But it wasn’t enough to stop the eel. In fact, his attacks only seemed to make it go faster.

No!

The tunnel was wide enough to grant him a view of what lay ahead even with the quarray directly in front of him, and he saw that the eel was heading straight for the chamber that it had come from. The first eel was already slithering away to freedom, being pelted by small bursts of magic from Skeehar’s group. One had escaped, another was about to. In his panic, Caramel tried to grab the quarray by the tail and quickly found that no amount of desperation was going to grant him the kind of power needed to stop several thousand pounds’ worth of predator in its tracks.

Come on, think of something…

He could vaguely hear the shouts of the others, telling him to forget about the quarray, that there was nothing he could do, that he should just let it go. Or something along those lines. He ignored them. There was a way. There had to be!

Caramel channelled as much of his reserves as he could, shaping it into kinetic force rather than heat. If he couldn’t stop the eel, he could at least divert it to buy some time for the others to overpower it.

Please don’t miss, please don’t miss…

His blast went right over the quarray’s back, inches from its highest dorsal fin, and struck the ceiling of the exit tunnel. The explosion sent a shockwave and debris, dust and water from the point of impact, revealing large cracks in the rock. It was enough to make the quarray stop in surprise, but not quite enough to effectively block its escape. In the moment it hesitated, Caramel skidded to a halt and crudely grasped at the cracks in the ceiling with his magic. He ground his teeth as he poured whatever he had left into shifting the chunks loose from the ceiling, shifting pressure into every weak spot he could find in the rock. An ache built up inside his skull as an odd vibration rang in his ears, and it took him a moment to realise that it was his own voice—he was screaming with the effort.

Then, one by one, boulders fell from the ceiling and crashed to the floor, their thunderous impacts pulverising loose debris and sending shards and flakes in every direction. When the last pebble had fallen, the tunnel was clogged up by a mound of debris, with only a tiny space at the top. The quarray hissed in frustration and tried to bulldoze its way through, but only succeeded in getting its snout stuck in the opening. It dropped the pods and stuck its head in again, twisting and thrashing wildly. Slowly, the rocks began to shift. It would only be a matter of time till it cleared enough to squeeze through.

Caramel whirled round and found a Rax and a whole group of other warriors and hunters standing behind, staring.

“Come on, hurry before it breaks through!” he urged.

Most of them did little more than take a hesitant step forward. Meanwhile, the quarray had already shifted a quarter of the blockage.

“What’s wrong with you guys? Help me!” Caramel shouted. “It’s going to take those ponies away!”

There was no time left to wait for them to wait. He had to move to save the two comatose ponies before the quarray picked them up again. After a taking a deep breath, he charged straight towards the eel. Then, he heard the thunder of hooves and buzz of wings, and his heart leapt when he saw other changelings following his lead. Sash and Rax were amongst them too.

Unfortunately, the quarray took notice of them. It immediately abandoned its efforts to break through the blockage, snagged up both pods by their ends with its mouth and surged down another tunnel. It was heading down to the barracks, and from there it would probably find one of the shafts that led to the old city to make its escape. Doggedly, Caramel pursued it down the tunnel with the others close behind. Its wounds were finally slowing it down, but there was no way for them to effectively restrain it by physical means—attempting to latch onto its lashing tail would be a bad idea no matter how many of them there were, and the tunnel was too narrow for them to safely overtake it.

Their opportunity came when the tunnel’s incline became vertical and opened up into the large cavern beneath the dwellings of Warrior Caste. The same one where he’d gotten a taste of the combat pheromones. The quarray slid out and fell the whole five storeys’ worth of distance between the opening and the cavern floor, and there was a bone-breaking crunch when it struck the bottom. Green fluid splattered in every direction, and it took him a moment to realise that one of the pods had burst from the impact. The quarray itself appeared stunned by the fall, as it groggily turned its head this way and that.

Caramel saw the whole scene below as he and they others fanned out from the tunnel exit, hovering from a safe height as they waited for everyone to get into place.

“Wait,” he cautioned, lifting a hoof in emphasis. He could see the pony from the ruptured pod right next to the eel’s head, and he did not want to risk getting him or her crushed if the quarray decided to put up a struggle.

There has to be a way to get it to leave them...

Unfortunately, the eel decided it for them. It abandoned the ruptured pod and began to slither off with its lone prize still in its jaws.

“Now!” Caramel shouted, and everyone streaked down towards the beast. At the same time, he heard Sassaflash directing a few others to go and tend to the freed pony to make sure that everything was okay.

They fell upon the quarray like ants on a caterpillar. In the openness of the large cavern, their numbers were finally an advantage. It could thrash about all it liked—there was plenty of space for them to manoeuvre, and unless they got sloppy and allowed it to roll over them, the risk of getting crushed was much lower. They only had to worry about its jaws and lashing tail, so most of them chose to land on its midsection and wreak havoc with their hooves and magical fire. Caramel found one of the gashes on its back where the scales had been seared away, and dug the notched edge of his hoof into directly into the wound. Others who had magic began to burn and prize away weakened scales, enabling their partners to attack the more vulnerable flesh beneath.

The quarray roared in pain and thrashed wildly, and they broke away and took to the air whenever it attempted to roll and crush them. Still, it kept fleeing, and as it drew closer to one of the tunnels without showing any signs of giving up its victim, Caramel put on a burst of speed, flew ahead of it and started flinging resin from his glands right into its eyes. Most of his shots missed, but one or two globs got into its eye and nostrils, and it shook its head violently in an effort to remove the offending stuff. The pod bounced forcefully, but it didn’t burst and its stalk remained intact. And the quarray was still heading towards the tunnel.

Does it even use its eyes? How the heck does it know where to go?

The hole in the ground ahead loomed wider and wider. Too close. The quarray was going to get away. He had to free the pony now.

Caramel flew in close and hovered tantalisingly in front of its face. It was a really stupid move, but he had no choice left. At the back of his mind, he was dimly aware of Rax shouting something at him.

Unfortunately, the quarray didn’t take the bait. It made no attempt to bite him, else it would’ve lost the pod. Caramel mentally snarled in frustration and landed directly on its snout. That provoked a reaction. The eel thrashed its head, but he held on tight and fought the onset of dizziness. When it stopped, he clambered to the side of its jaw and tried to burn through the stalk of the pod with magic. He only succeeded in giving himself a headache—his reserves were dry. He then spat on his hoof and rubbed it vigorously against the stalk. His saliva partially dissolved the dried resin and softened it a bit, but there was no time left. They were practically upon the exit tunnel. So he snagged the sharp edge of one of the holes in his foreleg on the stalk. It took a frantic second of working it back and forth, but the rubbery thing finally snapped and the pod bounced away.

Job done, Caramel leaped into the air... and heard a loud snap just before bone-shattering agony exploded in his right hind leg. The quarray surged into the sloping tunnel as he hung helplessly, his leg firmly in its jaw and his back grinding against the ground. He screamed as his wings were shredded. But through the tears of pain, he saw Rax and another changeling flit close and land on the quarray’s head, just as he had done. The only difference was that they did it from behind, and had to be a lot more careful to avoid getting crushed against the tunnel ceiling.

He saw the dismay on Rax’s face when he took a look at his broken leg, and as his friend skittered over to the quarray’s face, he tried to shout at him, to tell him to just leave. Only an incoherent groan left his mouth. He saw the quarray’s eye swivel to glare at his friend, just before Rax gouged it with his horn. The eel roared in agony and jerked its entire head upwards, and Caramel heard a sickening crunch before he tumbled to the ground and bounced several times before coming to a screeching halt on his side.

As he struggled to his hooves, he saw the quarray surge through a hole in the side of the tunnel—the one that opened to the old changeling city deep below. Shortly after, a dark shape tumbled down the sloping tunnel after it.

No. Oh sweet Celestia, please, no...

There was blood everywhere. There were cracks all over Rax’s carapace, and his limbs were all bent at unnatural angles. His body rolled and slowed until it was right at the edge. Caramel limped after him, grinding his teeth against the agony in his hind leg and the searing pain in his tattered wings.

One of Rax’s limbs dangled over the edge.

“No, hang on. Just hang on...” he pleaded. He was just only a few steps away...

Rax’s limp body shifted, and he fell just before Caramel reached out and missed.

A second later, panic set in his chest as he found himself slipping on Rax’s blood. He groped futilely as he too went over the edge. The wind roared in his ears for what seemed like a very long time. It was utterly dark—there were no luminous growths to provide light, and his horn was useless. Then, there was a tremendous splash, and the world became a muted storm of gurgles and rumbles.

Water. Flowing water. He vaguely remembered being told about the old city getting flooded during the rainy season. At the same time, he realised that he was going to drown if he didn’t act fast. He tried to tread water, but quickly found that changelings had a tendency to sink, what with their dense frames and holes in their legs. He was terrible at floating, and the current, though relatively slow, wasn’t doing him any favours.

Green lights flashed from above as he sank, and he made one last, desperate attempt to get back to the surface. Slowly, he ascended towards the light, not daring to release his breath for fear of losing what little buoyancy he had, even though his lungs were burning. With a final, agonised kick, he broke the surface. He gasped as two pairs of hooves grabbed at him, and he allowed himself to be lifted from the watery grave. He blinked when he recognised Sash as one of his rescuers.

“Wait...” he murmured. Looking down at the vast expanse of flowing water, he tried to pull her back, to get her to stop. “We need... to find him.”

“He’s gone, Caramel,” Sash said in a strained voice. “We’ll never find him in this. He probably didn’t even survive what the quarray did to him.”

No, there’s got to be a chance. He feebly shook his head. “Please,” he begged. He turned to his other rescuer and continued, “We have to try!”

The other changeling was silent.

“I’m sorry,” Sash replied.

Caramel was hurting all over. His hind leg was throbbing abominably, his shredded wings were wells of pain, and he was shivering from his dip in the frigid underground river. But on the inside, he was growing numb.

It began when Sash carried him back up the tunnel, when he finally got a good look at the occupant of the pod that he had freed from the quarray. She was on old, decrepit earth pony, wrinkled and skeletal in appearance. Loose hairs were floating all around her like dead leaves in the wind. It was immediately apparent that she wouldn’t have long to live even if she were freed.

When they got back into the cavern beneath the barracks, he found the pony from the ruptured pod to be similarly old. The featherless, balding pegasus was lying in a puddle of green fluid, drooling between slow, ragged breaths. He apparently didn’t have much time left, either. Queen Chrysalis and a few others was standing over the elderly pegasus, and when Caramel got close, she gave him a disappointed scowl.

“You should have listened,” she said.

“I couldn’t just let them get taken,” he murmured. Deep down, he knew that it had been the right thing to do. He couldn’t have left them just because they were old! But at the same time, he couldn’t help feeling that it would have been better for everyone if he had simply let the quarray take them away. Rax was gone, and for what? To extend the life of two old ponies by a few weeks, maybe months, at the most? It was just… unfair.

“Where were you?” he retorted. “You could’ve beaten the quarray flat!”

“She was with us,” snapped one of the changelings nearby. Hunter Caste, from the looks of her. “The queen was healing those who got chewed up when that thing broke into the repository and stole two pods. We would’ve lost three instead of just one if she hadn’t stabilised them.”

“I let it escape because we could afford to,” Chrysalis explained. She gestured at the wheezing, half-conscious pegasus before her and added, “He doesn’t have much time left anyway. There wouldn’t have been much point in trying to get him back. As I said, you should have listened to your siblings when they warned you to let it go.”

“But… I couldn’t…” he whispered. “It’s not right—”

The elderly pegasus suddenly gasped, drawing everyone’s attention. He blinked several times, revealing eyes that had gone milky with age. “Cinnamon? Tarty? Have you been hiding Grandpa’s glasses again? Why… why are all the lights out?” he murmured in a wheezy voice.

“Because you’re free,” Chrysalis replied.

The old pegasus didn’t seem to hear. “Children? Where are you?” he whispered.

Chrysalis’ horn glowed, and the entire puddle of fluid around the pegasus glowed. It flowed and coalesced around the old pony, until his entire body was engulfed. He stiffened and tried to flail about when it went into his mouth and nostrils, eyes widening in fear.

“Just breathe,” Chrysalis soothed. “Go back to your family. Sleep.”

Slowly, the pegasus calmed, until the only movement he made was the slow rise and fall of his chest as he breathed the fluid. The green aura brightened for a moment, and the surface of the fluid developed a glossy sheen as it hardened. When it was over, Chrysalis levitated the new pod over to the others, saying, “Take it back. And be careful, he’s fragile enough as he is.”

Then, turning her attention Caramel, she sternly added, “Your kind of morality has a steep price in our world, and Thorax paid for your conscience with his life. I’ll leave it to you to decide if it was worth it.”

* * * * *

Nearly two hours later, Caramel was huddled up in the dead end of a disused tunnel. Everything had been a blurry haze since Sash had carried him back up into the hive. He hadn’t flinched when Skeehar gave him a verbal beat down for disobeying her orders, nor had he been able to answer her when she told him to speak up for his actions. He simply kept silent and took whatever abuse came his way, even when she became physical to provoke a reaction from him. Eventually, Skeehar had seen fit to temporarily discharge him from Warrior Caste. Then, like a homeless pony, he’d simply wandered around aimlessly until he’d found a dead end that was secluded from any activity in the hive.

At some time in the middle of the night cycle, he became aware that there were three other changelings in the tunnel with him. When he looked up, he recognised Mandible, Scritch and Chitin. Rax’s brood mates.

“You couldn’t leave well enough alone, could you?” Mandible hissed.

Caramel didn’t answer. He couldn't.

Mandible shoved her muzzle in front of his and snarled, “Rax might have been an idiot, but he was still our brother.”

He averted his eyes, then grunted in pain when she slammed her hoof into his chest. Stars exploded in his vision when she followed up with a heavy back-hoof to the side of his jaw, knocking out a tooth. He fell flat onto the floor, gasping for breath.

“Useless grub,” she spat before getting up and kicking dirt in his face.

A moment later, he found Scritch leaning down by his side. “Sorry. We just need to get this out before we stop caring.”

What? For a moment, the oddity of that statement roused his mind from its stupor. What did he mean by that? But he had no chance to think further, as Scritch grabbed his mane, lifted his head up and then slammed it back onto the ground. Pain shot through his jaw and tongue, and he tasted blood.

As he squeezed his eyes tight against the pain, he heard Scritch stalking off. Slowly, he opened his eyes, just in time to see Chitin fling a pebble at him, and it struck him squarely in the forehead. Though it was only a small stone, it hurt just as much as everything else when he sensed her bitterness and sorrow.

They really do care for each other…

And that was when then he remembered Overseer Tibia’s words; “Changelings who fall in love don’t stay in love if their partner dies. It’s just how we are.”

Maybe it applied to siblings as well. Maybe that was why they spoke so casually about their dead when he was in the fungus farms, as if the only things they cared about their relatives was how to make the best use of their remains, as if they were little more than forgotten memories... Maybe that was why Rax’s closest siblings wanted to punish him before they stopped caring. How long would it take them to reach that stage?

Dread formed like a rock in his stomach when he realised that the same might happen to him. Was that why he was feeling so numb? Up until that point, he’d not even shed a single tear over Rax. He just felt… hollow.

“Caramel?”

He looked up in surprise. Chitin was gone. Instead, it was Sash standing in front of him. When he didn’t voice a reply, she lay down next to him. For several minutes, all was silent. He kept his eyes down, but he could feel her concerned gaze on him. She didn’t speak, and she didn’t touch him either. But she was just close enough that he could lean on her, as if she was giving him the option if he wanted to. She was simply there for him.

His numbness was slowly giving way to… something else. Discomfort. Guilt, maybe. Even after all that had happened, Sash was still willing to keep him company. Was it because she had already gotten over the passing of her sibling? Or was it because she was just used to this sort of tragedy? The more he thought about it, the less he wanted to remain in the hive. Would they get over each other just as easily if the same happened to either of them? He didn’t know. The silence stretched on as his discomfort grew, and eventually, he could stand it no longer.

“I want to go home…” he blubbered past his swollen tongue.

“I… I understand.”

He looked up and saw her gazing sadly at him. She really meant it.

“But I can’t come with you,” she continued.

“Why?” It came out like a pathetic whine.

“Where would we go? We’re changelings. Everypony is already on high alert. We can’t stay hidden forever.”

He shook his head. “I don’t know… we’ll think of something. Maybe—”

Sash placed a hoof on his foreleg. “I’m sorry. I love you, Caramel, but I love my brothers and sisters too. I… can’t leave them. Not after the invasion has left the whole hive in bad shape. We can’t afford to lose anyone right now.”

Her firm tone made it clear that she meant what she’d said. She wouldn’t leave the hive. Not even for him. Some primal part of him oozed resentment at that, but he regretted the thought almost immediately when he sensed that her love was very real. He could taste it. She was still cared for him. It was just that she cared for others as well, and she was willing to put their needs before hers and his. It was more pony-like than anything he’d exhibited since his coming to the hive. Now that he thought about it, no matter how much he tried to convince himself that had done it for her sake, deep down, his ‘chivalry’ was still self-serving in a way. He was the one who needed her. Not the other way around. She was so much stronger than him, and he now knew without a doubt that only one of them was capable of carrying on without the other.

He slumped and hung his head. Maybe it was better for everyone if he’d never come to the hive. Then Sash wouldn’t have to waste her time looking after him instead of her real family. He squeezed his eyes shut as another thought occurred to him; And Rax would still be alive.

A low moan escaped him as the guilt and heartache set in. His vision grew blurry as the tears began to flow. He lay flat on the ground and turned away from Sash, covering his face with his forelegs to hide himself from the world.

“Caramel…” he heard her say. She sounded like she was going to cry as well, and it only made him feel more undeserving and pathetic for forcing her to share in his sorrow and guilt and shame.

“I’m so… so sorry,” he choked out between sobs.

He heard a sniffle from Sash, and felt warmth as she held him gently like a mother comforting her foal. It was warmth and love that he did not deserve. He tried to pull away, but she did not let go.

“It’s going to be okay,” she whispered, and he felt something drip onto his back. “We’ll pull through. You’ll see. Just hang in there.”

Eventually, he stopped trying to struggle and simply cried with her.