//------------------------------// // Chapter 8: TARDISing // Story: The Monster that is Me // by Terrahex //------------------------------// o----[ Chapter 8: TARDISing ]---------------------o My second trip in the TARDIS was only marginally better than the first. Damaged as I was, I didn’t have nearly as much fun as the Doctor seemed to have, and while Ditzy did throw an apologetic look toward me, I suspected she liked it as much as the Doctor did. When the TARDIS stopped, the Doctor took it in stride. “Here we are, Canterlot castle.” “Excellent.” I smiled, trying to chase away the remaining agitation. “Let’s get going.” I put my hoof against the door, but I didn’t open it when I realized that the Doctor and Ditzy weren’t following. “You’re not coming.” I didn’t phrase it as a question. I knew that I was lucky just to get their help as long as I did. “If it’s any consolation,” The Doctor frowned, “it’s not for lack of wanting to help.” The smile returned to his face and I had no doubt that it was genuine. “You can take it from here.” “We’re already here.” Ditzy smiled as well, though hers was more apologetic. “We’re taking a big enough chance as it is.” “What do you-” “Paradoxes.” The Doctor interrupted. “Younger versions of Ditzy and I are already in Canterlot right now, chasing after a large carnivorous fungus through the sewer system if I recall.” “We can’t cross our own timeline.” Ditzy explained. “Bad things happen.” That made a lot of sense, and I wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. “Thank you.” I looked at both of them in turn. “Both of you. I don’t know what I would have done if you two hadn’t shown up.” The Doctor waved his hoof dismissively. “We’re only returning a favor. Someday we’ll ask you if there’s anything we can do for you, and you’ll think of now.” I was quiet for a bit. “I probably shouldn’t ask, but... how is it?” Ditzy tipped her head inquisitively, her eyes rolling around in their sockets. “What?” “The future.” 1 “That’s a dangerous question.” I shrugged. “It wouldn’t have felt right if I didn’t ask.” My smile was easy and without a trace of apology. “I’ll be off then.” I raised my hoof and nudged the door. it opened easily, squeaking at the hinges. “You’re brilliant.” The Doctor said as a good bye. “That’s all you can ever be.” The door shut behind me. The TARDIS quickly disappeared. ~~~~~ I’ve only been to Canterlot once, and I never got near the castle. I was lower on the mountain near the red district, the closest thing to a ghetto the most prosperous city in the world could have. The red district was nice enough, every building was certainly nicer than the nicest building in Ponyville. It wasn’t red though. Canterlot castle was a great deal nicer than the red district. The hallway I was deposited in had a high, arching ceiling, with long stone walls interrupted by large stained glass windows depicting fanciful creatures that I wasn’t sure existed. Large wooden doors occasionally interrupted the detailed masonry of the walls and were carved with fancy patterns. Even the floor was lavished with a myriad of colorful tiles. I almost didn’t mind being surrounded by three of Celestia’s royal guard, spears pointed at my face. Almost. I suppose I wasn’t exactly allowed to just TARDIS into a royal castle. Then again, I doubt there was a rule explicitly stating that I shouldn’t use the TARDIS to get into the castle. I doubted they’d appreciate it if I mentioned that though. “State your name.” One of them, a pegasus, gruffly demanded. Lying occurred to me. However, when I worked under somepony who personally knew and regularly exchanged letters with Celestia herself, I had a good chance at getting caught in that lie later, unnecessarily complicating the situation. Not to mention that despite being a changeling, I wasn’t the hottest liar around. “Midnight.” I replied, though I guess that was technically still a lie, but it was close enough to the truth. “I have urgent-” “How did you get here?” The same guard asked. “I-” “Hey!” Another guard raised his spear, a glare thrown off into the distance seemingly at nopony in particular, “what are you, thick? Captain Armor said that anyone observed with the blue box was to be apprehended and taken to him immediately.” This guard was a unicorn, and something about him was off. It took me a moment to realize that his eyes, fully white, didn’t focus on anything. He was blind. “Yes, Lieutenant.” The other guard, presumably a lower rank, saluted with his wing. He looked a bit annoyed, but complied anyway. “You two, comb the area. Trouble is known to crop up where when the police box shows up.” “Yes, sir!” They both shouted in unison, going in different directions. “Midnight?” The blind unicorn guard probed. “I trust you won’t do something stupid like run away.” The way he phrased it made it sound more like a statement than a question. “I doubt I’d make it very far.” I said truthfully, though I quickly realized how bad it made me look in more ways than one. It implied that I would run away if I thought I could, but I apparently couldn’t even escape from a blind pony. I opened my mouth to abridge that, but I decided to let it drop rather than draw attention to it. “You wouldn’t.” The guard agreed. An expression of disdain appeared on his face as he shouldered his spear. “I hate this thing.” He admitted. I didn’t know what to say to that, so I didn’t say anything. He began walking down the hall. I gave him a pony length before following him. A spear in the hooves of a blind pony is what makes more blind ponies, reminding me painfully that I couldn’t just shift away my ailments like my higher-ups in the hive could. The lieutenant led me through lavenous hallways, up flights of stairs, through doors of stone and wood. never once did he hesitate or bump into anything like I would expect a blind guard would. Eventually we reached an uninteresting door studded with iron. The blind guard knocked on it. “A passenger from the blue box has arrived, captain.” Where once there was silence there was now a sound like furniture being tipped over as the occupant(s) of the room scrambled to the door. The blind guard pushed me back a bit before the door flew open, brushing past the place where I had just been standing. “Where is he?” A lone white unicorn with a blue mane, the standard guard colors, demanded. He wore no armor, which jarred me. I had never seen a guard without armor. Rather, I probably had, but without enchanted armor, the colors of guard ponies return to their original scheme. I found my voice. “The Doctor? He’s gone. He was only dropping me off.” The guard captain looked me up and down, making me shift uncomfortably. When he spoke, he did so to my escort. “Lieutenant Vigilance, I trust you’ve searched the surrounding area?” “Redfield and Flusher are on it.” Vigilance nodded. The guard captain seemed unsatisfied with this. “Get Bitter Bun on it as well... and you’d better get down there as well. Sweep the entire area twice. We can’t risk missing anything.” Vigilance nodded again then excused himself out the door. The captain finally turned back to face me, a judging look on his face. I once again felt his eyes sliding down my form, stopping at my bandaged leg, my multiple bandaids, my back left leg that was barely touching the ground because when any weight was put on it, a jolt of pain would jump up my spine. “You look like a mess.” The captain said, his horn lighting up as he levitated the papers scattered across the ground into a messy stack. “I feel like a mess.” I admitted. “Do you need medical attention?” He asked. “No.” “Your name?” “Midnight.” “Captain Shining Armor, at your service.” Captain... Shining Armor? As in the captain Shining Armor? My fur tingled and I forgot all about Trixie. “I suppose you’d better come in.” Shining Armor entered the room, and I followed him after a moment of struggling with quivering legs. “So, to what do I owe this unexpected visit to?” He asked, his horn glowing with blue light as he swept up the mess he made in his mad rush to get to the door. “Uh... Ponyville! Ponyville is in trouble!” I choked out, trying to shake the awkwardness out of me. I’m Midnight, not Niphi. I had nothing to do with the invasion of Canterlot... “Is everyone okay?” He asked, an urgent tone in his voice. “Yeah... last time I was there. The only reason I got hurt was because I challenged Trixie. It figures. If the most powerful unicorn in Ponyville can’t beat her, then what could I do?” I said the last bit as a joke, but it only piqued his interest. “Twilight? Is she okay?” “Yeah,” I said, confused. “She’s actually going back to try to win a rematch. We need to get the Princess. She doesn’t stand a chance.” “What do you mean? Twilight is the most powerful unicorn I know.” “Yeah, but Trixie has a magic amulet.” “What?” “Okay,” I facehoofed, “maybe I should start from the beginning.” “That might be helpful, yes.” So I explained to him how Trixie came into town and started messing things up. At the mention of how Twilight bravely stepped up to defend Ponyville, he smiled. I told him how Twilight lost her fight and was banished. I told him how Lyra and I stepped up to the plate and were also beaten. I told him how I found Twilight with the Doctor’s help though I told him nothing of Ditzy and the words shared between the three of us. I told him about the alicorn amulet, I told him about Twilight’s plan, and I finally told him how I got to Canterlot. He was silent as I finished the story. “...And that’s why we need Luna.” Silence. Shining Armor’s eyes roamed his desk as if searching for something. “That’s quite a story.” He said finally. “I have complete faith in my sister, but...” “Sister?” “Twilight Sparkle. I thought you knew.” He said absently. …... Feath- no! Feathering feather. Not only did I make the bright decision of getting a job with Princess Celestia’s personal student and the element of magic, but apparently she’s also the sister of the captain of the guard whose wedding my species decided to crash. Feathering FEATHER. How stupid can I possibly be. I kept a strained smile on my face. “Cadence should be more than enough to handle this.” Shining Armor said, deep in thought. Of course. If Twilight’s brother wasn’t enough, let’s bring in her sister-in-law! Some part of me thought bitterly while the rest of me slowly began to sink into panic. Today was not my day. “What about princess Luna?” I asked timidly. “Luna is otherwise occupied.” Captain Armor replied sternly. He came out from behind his desk, trotting to the door. “You coming?” I didn’t want to. I just wanted to go home and sink into my bed and never get up. “Yeah.” I sighed, coming to my feet. I winced as stiffened limbs began to hurt as I raced to catch up with Shining Armor. ~~~~~ Princess Mi Amore Cadenza could really only be described in one way: graceful. And beautiful to a lesser extent, I suppose, but describing Princess Cadence as beautiful brings up an image that isn’t nearly as accurate as graceful is. While beautiful is what she looks like, graceful is what she is. Every movement she made was perfect and flawlessly elegant. Every smile that came to her face, and there were a lot of them, was natural and easy. Her voice was smooth and pleasant on your ear like a creek running over smooth stones. Every step she took caught your eye as if she were dancing. Princess Cadence fit well into the role of princess, even if she wasn’t nearly as important or widely known as Celestia. Her wedding, and the fiasco prior to it, had cast her back into the public eye, and when Captain Armor and I found her, she was entertaining the delegates from Zebrica over tea. At her husband’s calling, she politely yet gracefully excused herself even as the snooty, noble, gold plated zebras turned their noses up at the sight of me. “This had better be important.” Princess Cadence snapped at Shining Armor once the door to her rooms shut behind her. “I had them sitting next to each other! Sitting without a cold word between the two!” “Congratulations!” Shining Armor smiled, but dropped it when he saw that his wife wasn’t sharing in his enthusiasm. “Ahem... We need to head to Ponyville ASAP.” Cadence’s voice turned gentle. “Is something wrong?” Shining Armor nodded. “I’ll explain on the way. I’ve already sent word, there’s a chariot waiting for us.” “I don’t understand, Shining. Shouldn’t Luna handle this? We don’t have jurisdiction here.” “The Princess is otherwise occupied.” Shining Armor said automatically. “What is she doing?” Cadence asked, confusion thick in her voice. “I’d rather not say.” “Tell me right now.” She stamped her hoof. “She’s ah...” His eyes flickered toward me as he gave a resigned sigh. “I’d rather not say in front of our company.” “Wha-” Cadence followed his gaze and finally saw me. “Oh. Hello.” “Hi.” I said awkwardly. What do you say to the mare that your queen practically tried to murder? “Who is this?” She asked, directing her question to Shining. “Cadence, this is Midnight. She’s come from Ponyville.” Cadence looked me over. Her eyes didn’t widen or do anything of the sort but I could just feel that she was alarmed. “Oh my.” Shining Armor nodded. “And this is why we have to get to Ponyville.” “Are you okay?” Cadence asked, her voice dripping with her graceful concern. “I’ll be fine. Ponyville is what we need to focus on.” “Right.” Cadence nodded, a determined look on her face. “I assume you’ve already told Aunty Luna that we’re departing.” “Well, uh... No.” Shining stuttered. “She’s kind of... busy right now. I don’t want to disturb her.” “That may be, but she still needs to know that we’re leaving.” “You know that any other time I’d agree with you, but trust me when I say that this one time we should leave Luna to her business.” Cadence looked as if she was going to press the issue, but back down. “Alright sweetie. I trust you.” Up until that point I had been gently nursing on the stream of love flowing between the two of them, but when Cadence said that, the flood gates opened, throwing me into a fit of coughing. ~~~~~ Of course, Twilight being Twilight, when we reached Ponyville, it wasn’t under the tyrannical rule of a cynical sky-colored mare. The glass bowl was gone and the black clouds trapped within had been kicked away by the resident weather team. The royal chariot caused quite a commotion among the ponies when it set down, and Cadence immediately began greeting the ecstatic ponies. The signs that Trixie was here were still all over the place: banners, statues, houses damaged by the terrible storm caught in the bowl, settling my fear that the Doctor had put me down at the wrong time. It was clear that Twilight’s plan had succeeded. Good for her. So everything I just did was completely unnecessary. I sighed dejectedly. Captain Armor’s attention was fixed on his wife as she greeted the populace, and, judging I was no longer needed, I decided to prolong a goodbye and slipped off the back of the chariot, sucking in a breath as my hooves hit the ground. Despite the pain I felt, I was feeling good as I strutted (as best I could in my condition) away from the chariot and the gathering crowd of ponies. My hunger was sated thanks to Shining Armor and Princess Cadence, and Twilight stopped a threat to ponyville. I played a part, however small, in helping her do that. And Lyra... I wanted to know if Lyra was alright, but how was I supposed to find her? After all the activity today, I doubt she’d be playing in the park, and I didn’t know where she lived. Buck it. It had been a long day and I could worry about that tomorrow. Still being a little fuzzy with the layout of Ponyville, I locked my eyes on the canopy of leaves that I knew had to be the library. I set a pace and began weaving through the streets and alleys between buildings to reach my destination. ~~~~~ Stepping into the library was certainly an experience, meaning that I screamed to say the least. Every single shelf was empty and the floor was covered in a carpet of books, most of them splayed out and folding the inside pages. The desk was in the center of the room, two of the legs broken off, and the book ledger was nowhere to be seen. I tip toed around books incredulously. “What in Tartarus happened here?” I asked out loud, though nopony was around to hear me. Knowing that I was in no state, neither physically nor mentally, to fix any of this, I made my way to the stairs, climbed up said stairs until I reached my room, then collapsed in my bed inside said room, closing my eyes for what seemed like only a second. When I opened my eyes, my door was open and the silhouette of a pony was outlined against the light of the hall. I shouted in surprise, flailing my limbs wildly and bringing a wave of pain through my body. “Midnight, it’s just me!” Twilight stepped into my room, flicking on the light switch with her flowing purple tail, exposing my ruined room. She looked around ruefully. “Even your room is a mess.” “It was like that when I got in.” I said, wiping the sleep from my eyes. “Trixie turned the library upside down.” “She what?” I didn’t even know it was possible to move something so big with magic. No wonder I got my flank kicked. “And you missed an awesome party Pinkie Pie threw at Sugarcube Corner.” “You know I don’t really like parties.” … “We have something to discuss.” Twilight said without warning, looking at the mirror on the back of my door. Three long cracks originated from the center, spiking out to the edge of the mirror and reflecting three slightly different Twilights. “I’m afraid so.” I conceded dejectedly. “So I have four questions.” Twilight turned around, looking me in the eye seriously. “One: Why are you a unicorn? Two: why is your horn broken? Three: how did you hide your horn? And four: why didn’t you tell me about any of this?” “Uh...” Horseapples. I had expected questions, but her barrage left me looking like a deer in headlights. “I- I’ve always been a unicorn.” I said unconvincingly. “And I broke my horn years ago, but it never regrew... and I’ve been hiding it-” “You’re not a very good liar.” Twilight interjected. “I...” I looked away from her. Feather. This always happened when I found a place to stay. I always messed something up. I said the wrong thing. I transformed in my sleep. I ate too much love. Somepony always found me out and I was run out of town. “I’m sorry.” Twilight’s look softened, and she sighed. “Fine. I don’t need to know. Just answer me one question and promise not to lie.” “I promise.” I had a sinking feeling that I wouldn’t be able to keep my promise. “Are you...” Twilight started, looking at me with an unsure expression on her face. I bristled, waiting for the word ‘changeling.’ “Are you in trouble?” “W...What?” “It’s just,” Twilight elaborated, “you always look so unsure, and you’re always watching what you say. It’s like you’re a filly caught with her hoof in the cookie jar.” I didn’t really know what to say to that. “I... I don’t know what you’re talking about...” “No lying.” Twilight chastised. “No.” I conceded. “I’m not in trouble.” Not yet. But if this keeps up I will be. “It’s just post-moving nerves.” And there I go breaking my promise. Not only am I terrible at being a changeling, I’m also a terrible pony in general. Twilight looked me up and down. “Fine... but you’ve got to teach me that spell some time. I’ve never heard of a spell that can hid a unicorn’s horn.” “Yeah. Maybe sometime.” I smiled. “And thank you.” Twilight’s eyes softened. “For trying to beat Trixie.” She pulled me into a hug unexpectedly, a weak trickle of love dripping down my throat. “You’re a good friend.” I was suddenly unable to form a coherent thought. I couldn’t remember the last time somepony besides my mom had given me a hug. “But you’re going to the hospital tomorrow.” Twilight finished, unwrapping her hooves from around my neck. Going to the place full of ponies professionally trained to spot things wrong with ponies? I just dodged one bullet. Why would I voluntarily shoot myself? but I didn’t want to throw her kindness back in her face by refusing. I’d make some excuse tomorrow. I didn’t want to ruin this moment. “And we need to clean the entire library, reshelve all the books, and replace all the things that Trixie broke.” Twilight groaned. “And I need to practice for the show for the delegates from Saddle Arabia. So much to do.” “And so little time.” I agreed.