//------------------------------// // Election Fever (FiE Challenge) // Story: Friendship is Epic - Book 2: Dat Mareami Heat // by FlareGun45 //------------------------------// Hey brahs! Do I have a treat for you for this chapter! Ok… I’m going to be doing something new in my story. Once every few chapters, I dunno the distance to be sure, I’m going to be doing something known as the Friendship is Epic challenge. For every chapter I announce this challenge, I’m going to be doing something that I don’t normally do in any other chapter. Maybe I’ll NOT say a certain word, or I will speak in a difference language, or maybe I’ll wear stacks of hats throughout the whole chapter on my head, or I have octopus legs. Hey, your call if you want! YOU, that’s right YOU, the readers will have a chance to suggest on what I should do if I decide to take the challenge. For this chapter I’ll be starting off with something easy: I’m going to dress like a pirate; that means I have to wear an eye-patch and a peg leg on my left hind leg throughout the whole chapter. Alright, let’s get started! The last day of winter has finally come and you know what’s interesting? This is my very first Winter Wrap-Up! When I lived in Mareami, I had to make preparations for the northern birds when winter up here started, and at this time, Mareami’s Winter Wrap-Up is Bird Doo-doo Wrap-Up mostly. We start off in the morning of the last winter day where I was sleeping on Pinkie’s bed. Pinkie starts jumping on the bed, trying to wake me up. “Wake up, Flare! Wake up, it’s Winter Wrap Up Day!” “Daddy?” I mumbled as I was still half-asleep. “Winter Wrap Up!” Pinkie repeated herself. “You’re not daddy.” I said as I fell back asleep. “Thank goodness.” “So that’s how you’re going to be, huh?” Pinkie asked as she goes through her party trunk to find an air-horn. Once she finds it, she aims the air-horn close to my face, and then she bonks me on the head with it. “OW!” I yelled as I rubbed my head. “WAKE UP!” Pinkie demanded. “I’M AWAKE!” I yelled. “GOOD! I’M GLAD YOU ARE!” Pinkie yelled as she then blows the air horn on my face. “I’m soooo never spending the night with Pinkie EVER again!” I complained. So after breakfast was done, I headed outside to get some fresh air, and take a good look at the beautiful winter snow one last time. “Ahhh, what a beautiful snowy day! It’s too bad it’s all leaving though, sad face.” I said. “Well, at least I get to do Winter Wrap-Up for the very first time! Not like back in Mareami, where I had to do Bird Doo-doo Wrap-Up. How would the birds feel if I did that to their carriage?” “Hey, Flare!” Crystal said. “Sup brahs?” I asked. “Not much, what’s up with ya?” Aqua asked. “I’m feeling GREAT! This is my very first Winter Wrap-Up, you know? This is so awesome!” I said excitedly. “Yeah, mate. Winter Wrap-Up is really a fun event to participate in.” Aqua said. “I remember my first Winter Wrap-Up!” Crystal said. A cutaway shows Crystal piling snow into packages and then shoving them into a mailbox. “And let’s not forget the year they got me to retrieve the southern birds!” Another cutaway gag shows Crystal shoving birds in packages and shoving them in more mail boxes. “And there’s the year I had to get the nests ready.” A third cutaway gag shows Crystal successfully making a nest, and then sets it safely on a tree… and then she puts the entire tree into a package and shoves it into a mailbox. “I wonder what we’re doin this year though.” Aqua wondered. “I so wanna get the southern birds! It’s the right job for me!” I said excitedly. “Well we’ll see.” Aqua said. “What do you mean we’ll see?” I asked. “You don’t pick your job. Mayor Mare is the one that picks out the jobs for everypony, Flare.” Aqua reminded me. “Well….. I’m sure with enough requests I’m pretty sure the mayor will give me the job! I’m capable of doing the assignments I’m interested in doing!” I said. “Well, that remains to be seen.” Aqua said. “As long as I have enough packages, this Winter Wrap-Up is going to be a breeze for me!” Crystal said. “No pun intended.” So, the three of us walked over to town hall for our town meeting on how this Winter Wrap-Up is going to work. Aqua, Crystal, and I walked on over to the crowd and met up with the rest of our friends, and then Engie said to us, “Howdy you three!” “Sup bra- WHOA!” I yelled as my peg leg tripped over the snow a bit. “You alright, man?” Blaze asked. “Yeah I’m fine.” I said. “What’s up, Flare? I heard this is your first Winter Wrap-Up!” Rainbow Dash assumed as she elbowed me which made me lose my balance a bit. “Whoa! Whoa….. whoa…. it sure it, sista! This isn’t going to be a hard task is it?” I asked. “Nah, it’ll be easy! The mayor just assigns us which team to go on and Twilight organizes us so we can get winter finished, and on with spring!” Rainbow explained. “What puzzles me is, why are we doing Winter Wrap-Up the day RIGHT before Spring?” I asked. “I mean, it’ll be a rush if we do it today. If we started a few days ahead, maybe we wouldn’t rush so much.” “Our town population has increased, BIG TIME!” Engie said. “Ah think we’ll be fine, no rush!” “What do you guys usually do in Winter Wrap-Up?” I asked. “I just lead the pegasus team to clearing the clouds.” Rainbow said. “Didn’t you say you can clear all the clouds by yourself in 10 seconds flat?” I asked. “Yeah…. Why?” Rainbow asked. “Now that it’s Winter Wrap-Up, you ask for help! You keep saying you can clear the clouds yourself in 10 seconds flat, so how why don’t you do so? It’ll save us all a lot of time. Depot time!” . explained. “Well….. I……” Rainbow stuttered nervously a bit because I sure did confuse her! “I usually go around with a couple of other ponies, makin’ sure the water supply in town is running smoothly, and makin’ sure it’s not too frozen. I’m assuming that’s what I’m doing today.” Aqua said. “I hope I get to help wake up the animals!” Crystal said excitedly. “Oh, well be careful when you do so, Crystal. They’re awfully sensitive.” Fluttershy said. “I read you loud and clear Flutters!” Crystal said, winking at her. “What are you going to do Psyche, wherever you are?” I asked. “I’m to the left of you.” Psyche informed me. “Sure explains it. I’m wearing an eye-patch on my left eye so my coronation isn’t so good.” I said. “I dunno; this is my first Winter Wrap-Up in Ponyville. Hope it won’t be as hard as Winter Wrap-Up in Trottingham was!” Psyche hoped. A cutaway shows Psyche in Trottingham, shoveling snow off the roofs of buildings using a plastic spoon. Did I mention these buildings are hiiiiiiiiiiigh? The cutaway ends. “How about you Engie?” I asked. “Ah usually build some bots in doin’ the job for me, but everypony keeps calling me a lazy-geek because of it, so ah have to help mah bots out now whenever somepony walks by where I am. When nopony is around, that’s when ah goof off” Engie said. “Man, I can’t believe the Mayor has to choose our jobs for us! Why can’t we pick our own?” Crystal asked. “If I were mayor, I’d make freedom of choice, no matter the circumstances.” Psyche said. “Hey Psyche?” I asked. “Yes?” Psyche asked. “SHUT UP!” I ordered him. “Fillies and gentlecolts; welcome to the Ponyville Winter Wrap-Up 2013!” Mayor Mare started while talking on a mic in front of town hall and everypony cheered. “Now, first and foremost, let me say a few words before we get started. This winter was a big one!” “Ok, that was a few words!” Pinkie teased in the audience and everypony laughed. “Yes, very funny Pinkie Pie!” the mayor said as she fixes her glasses. “Now, since this winter had more snow then anything else, we ordered bigger plows for the farms, and some bigger shovels. I would like to personally thank Big McIntosh and Caramel for ordering them for us!” Everypony cheered and Caramel waved to everypony and Big Mac just shyly stroked his hoof. “Even though there’s more snow than we ever had, that would not mean it’ll mess with our honor! We will get Spring here on time, and with Twilight Sparkle as our organizer, we’ll be sure to stay on top! Now let’s get this Winter Wrap-Up started!” Everypony cheered. So the mayor gave the leaders ponies a clipboard, and collection of colored vests. The Weather Team leader was Rainbow Dash again, the Plant Team AppleJack, and Animal Team Amethyst Star. “Ok! I’ll need Fluttershy, Rarity, Lyra Heartstrings, Bon Bon, Minuette Colgate, Lemon Hearts, Sea Swirl, Crystal Iceblast, Spark Note, Psyche Illusion, Adventure Blade, Crèmepop, and Twinkleshine over here, please!” Amethyst Star called out. “Awesome! I get to be on the Animal Team again!” Crystal cheered. “Aww! I hope get to wake up the cute little grizzly bears!” Spark Note shoped. “Alright Plant Team! Ah need Berry Punch, Caramel, Big Mac, Cherry Berry, Doctor Whooves, Carrot Top, Daisy, Red Engineer, Woodenshy, Stereo, Cheerilee, Shoeshine, Daisy, and Coconut to come over here, please!” AppleJack called out. “It’s just the Doctor. Why does everypony keep saying my name wrong?” the Doctor complained. “Ah think ah know just the bot for this assignment! Ah was hopin to get this job!” Engie said. “Alright, everypony! Give me Pinkie Pie, Cloud Kicker, Derpy, Dizzy Twister, Parasol, Rainbowshine, Flare Gun, Water Gun, Raindrops, Sassaflash, Blaze Goldheart, Black Thunder, Mynx, and Aquatic Armor!” Rainbow Dash called out. “Yes! Isn’t this great, Flarey? Our first Winter Wrap-Up and we get to be on the same team!” Water cheered. “I know! I hope we get the birds! That way we can go back home and see our family! Praise the necromancers!” I cheered. “Whoa, Flare! That’s evil!” Water said in shock. “Here you two go!” Rainbow Dash said, giving us blue vests. “Oh this is awesome!” Water said, putting the vest over the vest she was already wearing, and I did the same with my jacket. “Hey how come you wear a jacket but I still wear a vest?” “You’ve been out of Mareami longer than I have, sis.” I said. “You’re used to the cold.” “Alright, it’s time to give you all the jobs that Twilight and the mayor gave us!” Rainbow said, looking through the clipboard she’s holding. “Black Thunder, Mynx, Cloud Kicker, Dizzy Twister; you’re with me in the clouds!” “As I expected! Can I do awesome skateboarding stunts while I’m up there?” Thunder asked. “No problem, dude! Doing stunts always gets the job done!” Rainbow said. “Aqua, you know what to do! Make sure the water in town is unfrozen and it is fresh!” “I’ll do my best, Rainbow.” Aqua said. “To make things easier, Twilight suggested in taking Water with you.” Rainbow said. “Sounds cool!” Aqua nodded. “Alright, Aqua! We’re going on another adventure together it seems!” Water said, putting her hoof around him. “Yes, indeed.” Aqua said. “Aww, but I thought we were going to do the birds together?” I asked. “Sorry, Flarey! Give mom and dad my love!” Water requested. “Pinkie, you’ll handle the ice that’s frozen in the lake.” Rainbow instructed her. “Okee dokey lokey!” Pinkie said. “And since Derpy keeps getting lost in getting the southern birds, you’ll be the one in getting them Blaze!” Rainbow instructed him. “But I wanted to stay here with you, Rainbow!” Blaze complained. “I’ll be here when you get back! Just get the job done fast, and come back here and see me!” Rainbow instructed him. “You’re right! I can get the job done fast. Don’t worry about a thing, Dashie! I’ll be back in an hour when I get all the birds.” Blaze said. “Go get ‘em tiger!” Rainbow said, and then Blaze flew off to get them. “Wait, if Blaze is getting the birds, what am I going to do?” I asked. “You and the rest of the team will get all the snow off the rooftops, and make sure no snow is overflowing the sewage drains.” Rainbow instructed me. “Make sure the baby doesn’t go into the kitchen and what?” I asked. “Is something wrong?” Rainbow asked. “You’re darn right something’s wrong! I wanted to get the birds!” I complained. “Sorry, but this is what the Mayor chose.” Rainbow said. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, well I’m going to go complain to that mayor! I wanna do the jobs I WANNA DO!” I shouted. “Then go ahead, complain. On the way there, go get those rooftops cleaned off.” Rainbow ordered me. I just glared at her and then I walked back over to town hall to go complain to the Mayor. I knocked on the door three times saying her name. “Come in!” the mayor called out while sitting at her desk. I opened the door and walked inside. “Ah, Flare Gun! What can I do for you?” “Yeah, while we’re all here working our flanks off outside, you get to relax in here over a cup of hot cocoa!” I complained. “I’m sorry, Flare, but I still have all this paperwork to fill out. Besides, Twilight assigned everypony a position, and I trust her to do well.” Mayor said. “Well….. I have a complaint.” I said. “What’s your complaint?” the mayor asked. “I wanted to be the one to go get the southern birds, since I know the south very well, it’s no problem! Why did you gave Blaze the job, but not me?” I asked. “Twilight says Blaze Goldheart is a fast flyer and knows to get the job done. He’s a Wonderbolt after all, and he’s been to the south before many times.” the mayor explained. “I know, but I used to live in Mareami. I wanted to go home and see my family and you want me to do a janitor’s job?!” I asked. “Mr. Gun, Winter Wrap-Up is a big event! I know you’re from a city that doesn’t know anything about Winter Wrap-Up, but I assure you, Twilight and I discussed it over, and we know what’s best to make sure Spring is here on time.” the mayor explained. “I know, but still! I want to see my family! Why can’t we choose our own jobs?” I asked. “I’m sorry, Mr. Gun. Now, please, go back to your assigned job.” The mayor instructed me. “But, mayor!” I whined. “No more on this subject. I have a lot of work to do.” the Mayor said. “Yeah, my flank!” I mumbled to myself as I walked out as I was about to walk out the door but thanks to my bad coronation, I slammed onto the side and hit my head. “OW!” I cried, and then I got myself straightened out, walked out, and was about to slam the door behind me, but the door didn’t do any harm to me, so I closed it gentlely. No need to put my anger on those who don’t deserve it. Isn’t that right, mayor’s office door? *starts talking in a squeaky voice* Oh, you’re right, Flare. You’re such a friendly guy, and so good-looking! *regular voice* Oh well thank you, door! How very kind of you! Don’t let yourself hit you on the way out. After a few minutes, I angrily went up to the first rooftop I saw and I started kicking the snow off, and sometimes I used my flare spell or hornsaber to help melt the snow, but I have to admit, it wasn’t easy walking on the rooftop, nor was it safe, under my condition. I started complaining to myself whist doing my job. “Stupid Mayor! She thinks she runs this town! Well I second that! Just wait until the next election! I am NOT voting for her! She makes me sick!” I groaned as I kicked snow off the roof, but the snow landed on somepony down below because I heard a gasp, and some mumbling coming from a pile of snow below me. I jumped on down (hesitantly), and the pile of snow kept mumbling. I just thought to myself, and then I added two coal eyes, a carrot nose, and a top hat to make it look like a snowpony. “Ta daa!” I said. The pony inside shook his head fast which showed his face, and it was Psyche! “Psyche?! What are you doing in my snowpony?!” “Why did you dump all this snow on me?!” Psyche yelled. “Sorry, brah! I didn’t know you were in there!” I said. “Please help me out.” Psyche asked. “Kay kay, hold still.” I used my rail-blast spell to push Psyche out of the snow pile, and he landed on the wall over a building. He rubbed his head. “Yeah, thanks.” Psyche said sarcastically. “No problemo, brah!” I said as I helped him up. “What’s going on? Aren’t you supposed to be waking up the animals?” “I’m having problems trying to locate the snakes. I looked in their dens and they’re not there.” Psyche said. A cutaway shows an airplane and a flight attendant is giving everypony on the plane some flight instructions, but all the passengers are not ponies, they’re snakes. “We decsssssssided to go sssssssouth for the winter. Sssssssince the birdsssssss can.” A snake said. The flight indented just stood there in shock. A pony that looks and sounds like Samuel L. Jackson then yelled, “I HAVE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHER-FLIPPIN SNAKES, ON THIS MOTHER-FLIPPIN PLANE!” The cutaway ends. “What about you, Flare?” Psyche asked. “Scraping all the snow off the rooftops?” “Unfortunately.” I said. “What’s wrong?” Psyche asked. “This is not the job I wanted!” I complained as I threw my shovel and it lands on Engie’s harvesting robot. It starts malfunctioning and starts chasing the rest of the harvesting ponies. “HEY, HEY! What’s going on?!” Engie yelled as he chases the harvesting robot. “Come back!” “Well, what job did you want, Captain Flare?” Psyche asked. “Yeah, ha ha.” I said sarcastically. “I wanted to go south to get the birds, but the mayor wouldn’t let me! Stupid mayor thinks she runs this town!” I complained. “But…. she’s the mayor! She DOES run this town.” Psyche reminded me. “It’s too bad though! She thinks she’s the big boss!” I complained. “I know what you mean. If I were mayor, I’d make freedom of choice, and make things in Ponyville for fair.” Psyche said. “And what are the odds of you becoming mayor?” I asked. “Better than yours.” Psyche said. “OH…!” Crystal yelled. “SNAP!” Snap yelled. “Crackle!” Crackle yelled. “KABOOM!” Billy Mays yelled as the background just explodes behind him. “Good point.” I nodded. “Sometimes I wish Winter Wrap-Up can be a lot easier than it is now.” I said as a spotlight shined over me. I looked up in confusion. “What’s this?” “What do you think?” Psyche asked sarcastically. “Oh what? I have to sing now?!” I complained. “Now you know how I feel.” Psyche said as he smirked at me. I shook my head. “Alright! Let’s get this over with.” So I started singing a parody of the Winter Wrap-Up song because….. well duh! Of course I’m singing a parody of Winter Wrap-Up during Winter Wrap-Up, its SOOOO suspecting! So obvious! Anyways, it goes like this: “Three months of unsuspecting freezing chill attacks….” Blaze sang. “We stayed warm with hot cocoa, and our blanket sacks….” Aqua sang. “But now I’m running out of building materials, and all transportation has stopped….” Engie sang. “And even though I love my boots, it’s making this loud clop….” Crystal sang as she clopped her boots on the ground. It was my turn to sing so I walked around the town, looking around. “It’s time to welcome Spring and all things big and mean; but it’s also time to say goodbye-“ I then tripped on the snow again with my peg leg. “…oh no I bent my spleen! How can I help, if I don’t have fun with it? I wanna have my choosing job, I don’t like this one little biiiiiit!” “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “There’s nothing you should fear!” Psyche sang. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang again. “I got a banana in my ear!” I sang as I pointed on a banana in my ear. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up! ‘Cause we drink root beer, because we drink root beer!” the ponies sang as they all took a drink of root beer in glass bottles. “Bringing back all the southern birds,” Blaze sang next, “but some of them were in boxes; I bet Crystal is to blame, she even packaged the foxes! We move along and I return to my wife! But where is that annoying duck, it’s almost 12:05!” “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “This robot needs more gears!” Engie sang as one of Engie’s robots bonks him on the head with a bat. “Ow!” “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “This water is froze right here!” Aqua sang as Princess Ana was waddling out of the frozen water with her frozen skirt in this frozen town in the Frozen movie. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up! ‘Cause tomorrow we will sheer, ‘cause tomorrow we will sheer!” the ponies sang as some packs of sheep started gasping. “The little creatures hibernate and all lost some weight!” Water sang. “Time to welcome the sunburns, oh I can hardly wait!” Crèmepop sang. “Whacking all the clouds, along with starting a show! What do you say about my stunts?” Black Thunder sang. “We’ll give it an 8.3!” Water and Crème both sang. “Oh real mature.” Thunder complained as he glared at them. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “No more freezing benches on my rear!” Woodenshy sang as he sat down on a bench. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “The hot flashes are very near!” Candy Cotton sang. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up! ‘Cause hot flashes are very near, ‘cause hot flashes are very near!” the ponies sang. “Gonna break all the ice, and also spilling the beans!” Water sang. “Throw out the old raggy rugs, because they burn the knees.” Crèmepop sang. “Decorate the trees….” Rarity sang. “No Rarity, you sang at the last song.” Crystal sang. “Wake up all the animals….” Fluttershy sang. “I’ll allow Fluttershy to sleep along!” Crystal sang. “Yeah, really mature.” Rarity complained as she glared at her. “I’m with ya, marefriend.” Thunder said. “Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up!” the ponies sang. “Let’s finish our Holiday jeers! Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! ‘Cause tomorrow is Spring I fear. Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up! ‘Cause tomorrow is Spring I fear, ‘cause tomorrow is Spring I fear! Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up! Let’s finish our Holiday jeers! Winter Screw-Up, Winter Screw-Up! ‘Cause tomorrow is Spring I fear. Winter Wrap-Up, Winter Wrap-Up!” “Cause tomorrow is Spring I fear, ‘cause tomorrow is Spring I fear, I got a banana in my eaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar……” I sang during the conclusion of the song, and then I swallowed a fly because my mouth was opened wide. “Swallowed a fly!” Just as the song ended, I just finished my duties and Winter Wrap-Up was nearly over. “Well, that wasn’t so bad.” I said. “You see, Flare? Like I said, when you have a problem you’ll get over it!” Psyche said. “When did you say that?” I asked. “Well….. that’s not the point. You did your Winter Wrap-Up duties, and how do you feel?” Psyche asked. “I feel pretty good, brah! Winter Wrap-Up was really really fun!” I said. “Can’t wait until Winter comes back, and then we can wrap it up again!” “So does that mean you’re not mad at Mayor Mare anymore?” Psyche asked. “Of course I’m still mad at her! Even though I’m ok with these shoveling snow duties, the mayor still didn’t give me what I wanted, and she still just SAT THERE in TOWN HALL doing NOTHING!” I complained. “I know it’s pretty hard, but that’s just what a mayor does, run a town, and they say it’s a lot harder than it looks.” Psyche said. “Well, she’s still making property tax go too high, and not to mention the security in this town is awful! Are there even any cops in this town?” I asked. “I suppose you got point there.” Psyche said. “Got a point? Bro, don’t get me STARTED! Mayor Mare doesn’t deserve- Lawl! Mayor Mare, that sounds like I’m saying ‘mirror mirror’ a bit!” I laughed. “Mayor Mare on the wall, who is the most laziest one of all? That’s you!” “So you have any other reasons that the mayor shouldn’t be mayor anymore?” Psyche asked. “I got a whole list, and I checked it twice!” I said. “Just wait until the next election!” “What? You’re running for mayor?” Psyche asked. “No, I don’t have much experience in running a town, but YOU do!” I said. “Me?!” Psyche asked. “Psyche, you’re very smart, understanding, compassionable, and you know what needs to be done! You’d make a great mayor, brah!” I said. “If you say all that stuff about me, why are you always rude to me and say shut up all the time?” Psyche asked. “Because you’re the Meg Griffin of the group, and we need somepony to be our toy, and you were the best choice!” I said. “Well…. That’ll be a subject we’ll get to later, but I don’t know, man.” Psyche said. “Trust me, Psyche! In the next Ponyville election, you’re going to be our new mayor, and the Noble Six and I are going to help you get there! Ooo I rhymed!” I said. “Well… if you say so.” Psyche said. “You’re in luck, guys. The next Ponyville election is actually coming up. The mayor’s four-year term is almost up.” Fluttershy said. “That’s perfect! Psyche can you do this, please?” I begged him. “Well….. I’ll think about it.” Psyche said. “Take a walk around town while ‘Dust In The Wind’ is playing in the background, then let me know what you think then.” I advised him. “You said ‘then’ twice.” Flutters said. “Alright.” Psyche said. So he took a walk around town while the song ‘Dust In The Wind’ was playing in the background. Psyche was walking around kicking a tin can in the melted city streets, as certain objects around him turned into dust in the wind behind him, one of the objects was Engineer’s robot, and Engie was pretty aggravated, and another object was a Lyra and Bonnie sitting on a bench, and the bench turns into dust in the wind, and Lyra and Bonnie just fall off. Psyche then leans over on a hill edge, looking over the town, and dust was flying around, and all this that was going on turned out to be a snowglobe (or a dustglobe) that Psyche was holding on his hoof. Psyche then was skipping rocks down at the Ponyville lake that was finally melted. The song finally ended after he skipped his last rock. That night, I was cleaning up one of my drinking glasses at my shop, and talking to Keith while I was at it. “So Addie, why didn’t you sing along during our Winter-Wrap Up parody?” I asked him. “I don’t sing.” He said. “Even if everypony was singing along and you were the only one left out?” I asked. “Yee.” Addie said. “Well that’s dumb.” I said. “Oh.” He said. “Yeah.” I said. “Ok.” He said. “Oh.” I said. “Yeah.” He said. “Ok.” I said. Just then my phone begins to vibrate. I took it out to see what’s up. “I just got a poke from you. How did you poke me when you were talking to me the whole time?” “I dunno.” Addie said. “I poked you many minutes ago.” “My phone is so slow!” I complained. Just then Psyche bursted in with his answer; “Ok, let’s do it.” “Do what?” I asked. “To be mayor! I gave you my answer and I’ll do it.” Psyche reminded me. “Hey, Keith.” “Hey, Psyche.” Addie greeted. “Alright! Let’s do it then!” I cried in excitement. “I hope you realize I’ll need your help in making an investment.” Psyche informed me. “Ehh, whatever. Gotta make sacrifices.” I shrugged. The next day came, and Psyche and I were at my place getting stuff ready for the next election. “Ok, Psyche, now that you’re going to become mayor, we have to think of things you’ll have to promise the town when you become one. Now, what are you going to do to the town when you become mayor?” I asked. “Well, I’ll increase security around here. I mean you know the changelings keep coming, and not to mention Dr. Swinebutt keeps trying to ruin you.” Psyche said. “I haven’t seen Swinebutt since the time Crystal and Black Thunder nearly broke up.” I said. “But he could come back.” Psyche added. “That is true.” I said as I wrote down on the notepad I’m carrying. “Increase security. Alright, what else?” “Freedom of choice! I know you didn’t like it when Mare didn’t give you the job you wanted, so I’ll add that to the picture.” Psyche said. “Freedom of choice.” I said as I wrote it down. “Anything else?” “Mare has been raising taxes so I’ll try my best to lower them as much as I can.” Psyche said. “Lower taxes.” I said, writing it down. “More festivals! Remember the Fall Festival you made? Maybe we should have more events!” Psyche suggested. “I like your style, brah! More events!” I said, writing it down. “Alright so what do you have so far?” Psyche asked. “Let’s see, uhh….. well…..” I didn’t know what to say because the list wasn’t what I was writing down. “C’mon, Flare, you wrote down all my suggestions on the notebook already, how can you not know?” Psyche asked. “Now Psyche, there’s a logical explanation for this.” I said. Psyche glared at me and then grabbed the notebook out of my hooves, and took a look at it. What he saw on the notepad was a drawing of Psyche blabbering, while I’m lying dead on the ground from boredom. “Oh you’re just the worst.” Psyche said with an annoyed tone. “Thank you!” I said, smiling at him. Later on, we came back from the hardware store with giant posters and sticks, and other supplies. “If you’re to become mayor, Psyche, you’ll need a logo and a theme.” “Ok, what do you have in mind?” Psyche asked. “Let’s start off with the logo. I was thinking a giant star in the background with your name on it.” I suggested. “Ok.” Psyche said, shrugging. “What? Ok?” I asked. “Yeah.” Psyche said. “You’re just gonna go with that? You’re not going to argue with me?” I asked. “No, why?” Psyche asked. “I wanted us to have an argument.” I said. “Look, I’m ok with the logo, I like it!” Psyche said. “A star with your name on it? You can’t think of a better one?” I asked. “Not really.” Psyche said. “C’mon, brah! Let’s have an argument!” I demanded. “No! What’s the use or arguing? I like your logo idea!” Psyche said. “Yes, we must argue! It’s what makes our friendship go on!” I said. “No, Flare!” Psyche yelled. “YES! We must argue!” I yelled. “NO!” Psyche argued with me. “YES!” “NO!” “YES!” “NO!” “YES! Look, there’s no use saying no! We’re already arguing!” I informed him. “What?” Psyche asked confusingly, and then he looked at me annoyed again. “Seriously, Flare? Wow!” “You gotta admit, that was pretty clever, wasn’t it?” I asked. “Yes, yes it was.” Psyche said. “No it wasn’t.” I said. “Shut up.” Psyche said. “No you shut up! We must argue again!” I demanded. “We have the logo idea, how about the theme?” Psyche asked. “Do I have to figure out EVERYTHING for you?” I asked. “Dude, I’m going to be the mayor, but you have better ideas than I do.” Psyche said. “Maybe I should become mayor then!” I suggested. “No!” Psyche yelled. “I’m just kidding, man! I’ll make a terrible mayor, but you have the makings of one!” I said. “Alright, you want me to pick the theme? Ok. How about, ‘Psyche knows your future’?” Psyche asked. “Ehhh, I’ll put that one for a maybe.” I said. “How about ‘Psyche! I got you good!’?” I suggested. “C’mon, let’s be serious. This is not a class election; this is a real-life town mayor election.” Psyche said. “I never said it wasn’t.” I said. “We have to think of a good theme, bro. One that’ll blow the minds of everypony! One that shows I am the perfect mayor for this town. One that says ‘If you know what freedom is like, you’d vote for Psyche’!” Psyche said. I gasped right after he said that. “What?” “Perfect!” I said. “What’s perfect?” Psyche asked. “Something that is exactly what you wanted!” I said. “I know what perfect means; I’m just asking why you’re saying perfect?” Psyche asked. “That theme, you just said, it’s perfect! If you know what freedom is like, you’d vote for Psyche! Genius, brah! Genius!” I said. “Then I suppose we came to an agreement.” Psyche nodded. A little while after, we were painting the signs. “Vote for Psyche! Doesn’t this sign look awesome, Flare?” “You should’ve put a number 4 where the ‘for’ is suppose to be.” I suggested. “But ‘four’ and ‘for’ are two different things.” Psyche said. “It’s weird that you think it matters how you spell the word, whether it’s a number or a verb.” I said. “If I put in a ‘4’ instead, ponies will think I’m not qualified for the job.” Psyche said. “But Psyche, that’s the complete opposite! They’ll think you’re more qualified for the job because of your originality!” I said. “Using a ‘4’ for ‘for’ is not original. It’s been around since the dawn of time.” Psyche said. A cutaway shows a cavepony holding up a sign over a fire that says ‘Fire 4 Ugher’. The cutaway ends. “Look, this is Ponyville, not Canterlot. Ponies aren’t that classy here. Nopony cares if you use a number where a verb is supposed to be.” I explained. “You make signs your own way, alright? I’ll make the signs my way.” Psyche said. “Roger that! I’m sticking with the ‘4’!” I said as I showed the sign to Psyche that says ‘Vote 4 Pedro’. “Vote for Pedro? Bro, this paint doesn’t come off!” Psyche said. “Teaches you to use pencils more then.” I said. “Flare, why can’t I ever take you seriously sometimes?” Psyche asked. “Look, Psyche, every time we have a big adventure together it always ends up with us arguing, and you saying offensive opinions about me. Can’t we have ONE adventure with us not fighting?” I asked. “I thought you said you wanted arguing?” Psyche asked. “Only when I want them.” I said. Psyche sighed. “Look, we’ll leave the signs for later. I should work on my public speech.” “Whatever you say, Pedro.” I said. “Don’t call me that.” Psyche shook his annoyed and said. “Would you rather I call you Edward?” I asked. “Pedro is fine.” Psyche said. “You need some food in your system to make a great speech! I’ll make us some banana splits! What do you say?” I suggested. “That sounds nice, Flare! Sure!” Psyche agreed. So we went into the kitchen, I made us both some banana split sundaes with gummy bears in them, and Psyche got himself some paper and a pencil so he could write his speech. “You don’t need to use paper, you know. You can borrow one of the computers in the lounge!” I suggested. “It’s ok; I like writing better.” Psyche said. “So how you going to start your speech? Fellow citizens? Fillies and gentlecolts? Once upon a time? Twis was the night before Hearth’s Warming?” I asked. “I dunno I’ll have to think it over.” I said. “Just don’t add any of that ‘What John Kennedy said’ quotes, or something like that. Nopony wants to hear other’s opinions.” I advised him. “Don’t worry; I wasn’t planning to add any quotes in the speech.” Psyche said. “I’ll bet you 10 bits that Mare is going to add a quote in her speech.” I said. “I’m not taking that bet ‘cause I agree with you.” Psyche said. “Try to be more original in your speech too. I don’t think it’s a good idea to add a ‘And further more’ in it.” I suggested. “Why not?” Psyche asked. “Because that phrase is for president speeches, not mayor speeches.” I said. “Alright, alright. I’ll think of something.” Psyche said taking a bite out of his ice cream. “Yep! I have nothing but good feelings about ya, ma boy!” I said as I took a bite out of my ice cream too. “GAH! Brain freeze!” I cried. After a little while, we finished our sundaes, and Psyche was still thinking of what to put in his speech. “How long do you think you’re gonna make that speech anyway?” “I don’t know, but this has to be perfect.” Psyche said. “Psyche, it’s no biggie. It doesn’t have to be perfect.” I said. “I know, but…. I really need this mayor job!” Psyche said. “Since when were you so interested in it?” I asked. “Right after I realized what this town is going through, to think of all the achievements I’d accomplish! Flare, this is just what I need! I can’t lose this election!” Psyche freaked out. “Well, I…” I stuttered. “Flare! This is a big deal!” Psyche said excitedly as he grabbed my vest (aww, I already miss my blue jacket I used to wear when it was cold). “I need this mayor job for this particular achievement I have to accomplish! You have to help me win!” “I will if you let go of my vest!” I said angrily. Psyche lets go of my vest. “Why does everypony keep grabbing my vest or my jacket for that matter? This vest is NOT supposed to be grabbed! The next pony that grabs my vest is going to have a swift kick in the face! So much that I’ll use their bleeding nose as a ketchup dispenser!” “I’m sorry, Flare. Calm down!” Psyche advised me. “S’ok.” I said. “Just… how long will you be writing on that speech?” “As long as it takes, Flare. As long as it takes.” Psyche said. “Alright, well…. I’m gonna go play GTA 4 and record how many times Roman asks me to hang with him. Call me when you need me.” I said as I walked out of the kitchen and back into the lounge. Psyche just sat there thinking of what to put in his speech. He was sitting there for hours and hours writing down stuff, but if the speech wasn’t good enough, he crumpled it up and threw it in the trash bin. The trash bin I have in my kitchen is one of those circle ones with the thing on top, when you push it, it can sometimes spin around. It’s awesome! I’ve always wanted one of those trash bins for my kitchen! The trash bin in the kitchen back at home was square! Bleh! Oh wait, why am I talking about trash bins? Anyways, Psyche was on his 39th redo of his speech. It was 10:00 at night and Psyche was feeling pretty tired. I made him a little coffee to help him stay awake, and I got him an egg roll and some wonton soup from a Chinese restaurant that I ate at for dinner. I had egg fu yung over there. Felt pretty weird having breakfast for dinner, you know? It became midnight and Psyche was on his 56th redo. I let him stay for the night so he can work on his speech. I was just on the XBUCKs, playing GTA 4 in the other room, playing one of Brucie’s car theft missions. A little while later, I went to bed, but Psyche was still wide awake doing his speech. He got to his 70th redo, and there was no more paper in the house; well, there was toilet paper, and tissues, and paper towels, but who would want to write on those? So I let him use my dry-erase board to make his speeches. 4:30 in the morning, the marker he was using went dry, and….. well, I lost count on the redos he went through. Since there wasn’t much of another option, he couldn’t wake me up to find an alternative, so he used my paper towels to make his speeches. The time was 5:12 in the morning, and there was no more coffee. Before Psyche could find an alternative, he passed out on my table. I got up at 7:49, and walked into the kitchen to check on Psyche. I found him sleeping on my table, drooling on one of the place mats, and one of the paper towels he was using to make his speech. “Oh nice work, Psyche!” I said upsettingly. “Use up all my paper towels to make your stupid speech! You would’ve saved a lot of trees if you just used a computer, man!” I went to get some coffee, but of course…. “Oh nice job! You used all my coffee too! Well, if you ate all my cinnamon rolls, I’m going to kill you.” I looked in the fridge, and saw the cinnamon rolls were still there. “Oh phew! You’re safe Psyche…….. for now.” I said mischievously as I ate one of the rolls, but slowly as I smirked at him. I sat down at the table across from Psyche who was still sleeping like a rock. I dunno how they got that expression: ‘Sleeping like a rock’? Rocks don’t sleep, they’re dried up lava! How is dried up lava sleeping? Though, I think maybe a few rocks around the world are actually meteors or asteroids that fell from space, shrunk in the atmosphere and landed on the ground as the rocks we see now. Perhaps…. So I continued to sit there, drinking tea, I said I was out of coffee not tea, and eating my cinnamon roll, while staring at Psyche and thinking about an old pharmacy called Eckerds, which all of them got replaced by CVS Pharmacy, but we’ll get back to that story another time. I then took a shower, got dressed, brushed my teeth, shaved off my invisible beard, fed my fish, and came back to see Psyche was still passed out on the table. I was going to ignore him, and let him wake up himself, but I’m about to leave, and I don’t trust ANYPONY to be in my trailer when I’m not here, unless it was Water, but Water got an early start today because she has a playdate with Aqua’s sister Wind Racer. So I filled up a bucket of water because I really wanted to wake Psyche up, but…. I did not dump the water on him, and no I didn’t put his hoof inside the bucket so he’d wet his pants. I’d do that if he WAS wearing pants. What I did do with the bucket full of water, is I put it on the table, and I started banging on it with a big metal spoon, and started singing Good Morning to You really loud in his ear with a megaphone. Psyche screamed as he woke up and fell off the chair. “Ow!” Psyche yelled, rubbing his head. I continued singing, and then Psyche took the spoon out of my hoof, and hit me on the head with it. “Ow!” I yelled from the megaphone. “Ow!” Psyche yelled as my ‘ow’ was too loud for him. “You know I don’t like it when ponies wake me up using something very loud.” “If we were anywhere else, then sure, but you’re in my house.” I said from the megaphone. “And turn the megaphone off!” Psyche cried. I turned off the megaphone and put it on the table. “What’s the big deal, man?” “It’s time for you to go. You were here all night and you’re gonna be late for your speech if you don’t get yourself cleaned up real soon!” I reminded him. “Oh fie! THE SPEECH!” Psyche yelled, looking at the clock. “It’s almost 10:00! Why didn’t you tell me sooner?!” “I gave you a chance to wake up yourself.” I said. “My speech! Where is it?” Psyche asked, looking through the pile of papers that were in the trash bin. “I dunno, which speech are you talking about? You made a lot of speeches last night.” I teased and laughed. “Flare, I’m not joking around! One of these speeches has to work!” Psyche said. “I don’t think you’ll find any of them good.” I said. “Why not?” Psyche asked. “If you thought those speeches were good, you wouldn’ve thrown them away in the first place! Duh!” I reminded him. Psyche groaned and started looking through his thrown away speeches, and started to freak out, but then I took a look at one of the speeches that Psyche wrote down on a paper towel, and I nodded my head. “How about this one?” “What about it?” Psyche asked, still searching. “I kinda like this one.” I said. “Yeah, not bad! I think this one will do the trick!” “Let me see it!” Psyche said, taking the paper towel speech and reading it. “Yeah, you’re right. This one is good!” “See? I knew you could make a great speech! You’re the smart one in the group you know!” I said as I winked at him. “Thanks!” Psyche said. “I can see it now! Mr. Illusion!” I said. “Mr. Psyche Illusion! The greatest mayor in Ponyville that ponykind has ever known!” “Well c’mon, Flare! Let’s go!” Psyche said, about to run out. “Let’s? What’s with this ‘let’s’ nonsense?” I asked. “I can’t do this alone.” Psyche said. “Well you’re going to have to. I have a lot of errands to run.” I said. “But you said you were coming along!” Psyche reminded me. “Well, I was going to, but I have to get more paper, paper towels, dry-erase markers, and coffee because SOMEPONY used them all up!” I explained. “But who would- Oh…. Right…..” Psyche said, feeling embarrassed. “Sorry about that. Here….” Psyche took out a few bits from his pocket. “Here, this should be enough.” “No, no, it’s ok.” I said, refusing his offer. “I insist.” Psyche said. ”You need the money more than I do. I’m loaded!” I said. “Since when did you become loaded?” Psyche asked. “I run two pizza parlors and one of them is in Canterlot. How can I NOT be loaded?” I explained. “Good point.” Psyche said. So Psyche went over to town hall to turn in his speech. Luckily, my errands didn’t take too long, so I was able to join the crowd before the ceremony started. I brought myself a cooler full of drinks, just in case I get parched, and I wouldn’t be a surprise if I was, since I’ve been having a sore throat this morning; and besides, the cooler is a nice little place to sit on, or stand on if I needed to see from farther away. Princess Luna came on the scene to start the election. “Fillies and gentlecolts; welcome to the 375th annual Ponyville election!” Luna said, starting the ceremony off. “Now before we begin, let me take the chance to say how well you all did in the last Winter Wrap-Up! Because of all the new ponies we’ve been having this past year, Ponyville has broken its record at the most Winter Wrap-Ups it has ever had!” Everypony cheered. “Now, let us take our chance to meet our contestants and let them make their speeches! Our first candied: the former mayor of Ponyville who wants to try her luck again, Mare!” Everypony clops their hooves as Mare makes her way to the stage. Mare clears her throat and starts her speech; “Good morning, everypony!” “It’s noon!” a pony in the audience yelled out. “I am here with you today because I would like to be your new mayor!” Mare said. “No duh!” the same pony in the audience called out. “Now, if I go back to becoming your mayor again, I assure you, I wouldn’t stop until everypony is completely scarified and safe. I’d continue my hard work to make sure Ponyville is in the condition it already is! I know I am well qualified for the job! Pick me as your mayor, and Ponyville will remain peaceful and happy! Thank you!” Everypony clapped their hooves for her as she walked off stage. “Wow, what kind of speech was that? She didn’t even put much effort in it!” I complained. “I seen gym signs put more effort in then that!” A cutaway shows a sign outside a gym that says ‘Tired of being fat and ugly? Just be ugly, and join the gym!’ The cutaway ends. “And now for our runner-ups! Please put your hooves together for…. Psyche Illusion!” Luna said. Everypony clapped their hooves as Psyche walked up on stage. He started his speech: “Dearest Ponyville citizens! I am proud to be here today! I was from a city called Trottingham, which had lots of crime and thugs everywhere! I can’t become a mayor of a town that big, but here…. Here is different! Everything is so peaceful, and to make sure we have no crime in our town, I’d like to install a police force in our town, to keep it safe! This town needs a sheriff! To make sure everypony is happy, there’ll be a suggestion box in my new office if I am to be elected. Thank you all, and long live Equestria!” Everypony clapped their hooves as he walked off stage. I ran over to the side of the stage to congratulate him. “How did I do, man?” he asked. “You did well! You did really well!” I said. “Thank you, Flare! Maybe being mayor won’t be so bad!” Psyche said. “I bet you’re gonna win this one, brah!” I said. “Now, for our last runner-up. He’s a former-police chief, and wants to keep this town in order! Please give a warm welcome to Penny Nickels!” Luna said. “WHAT?!” Psyche and I both yelled. Officer Penny Nickels…. If you read Chapter 9 of Book 2, you’d know he was a police chief that arrested us when we went to Trottingham to steal Psyche’s family crest. It was all a set-up though; he was working for Dr. Swinebutt. “Thank you! Thank you!” Nickels said as he walked up on stage. “I feel honored to be welcomed by you fine ponies! Really, it warms my heart!” “What is this all about?” I whispered to Psyche. “I don’t know! What is he doing here?” Psyche whispered back. “That’s what I’m asking you!” I whispered. “I’m keeping a close eye on Nickels, he’s up to something.” Psyche whispered. “If he’s here, then Swinebutt shouldn’t be too far away. I’m going to go look for him.” I whispered. “You do that.” Psyche whispered. So as Psyche was listening to Nickel’s speech, I went out to look for anything out of the ordinary. Everypony was at the ceremony, so Swinebutt shouldn’t be too much in hiding. I found a strange looking van not so far away from town hall. ”Swinebutt!” I said to myself while walking towards the van. I tried opening the door, but it was locked. “Oh, so that’s how you wanna play it, huh?” I then used my hornsaber spell to break through the van and then I eventually opened it. “ALRIGHT, SWINEBUTT! What is this all abo- oh, hello.” It turned out that this wasn’t Swinebutt’s van, its Vinyl Scratch’s DJ van. “What are you doing?!” Vinyl Scratch yelled. “Sorry, sorry! I thought you were somepony else!” I said embarrassingly. I took out my checkbook, and wrote down a check for 200 bits. “Here, this should cover the damage.” Vinyl grabbed the check, and then she kicked me out of her van, and drove away. While I was sitting there, rubbing my head, I saw Swinebutt sitting down which was where the van was, but on the other side, carrying a small device. “SWINEBUTT!” I yelled. “Well, well, well!” Swinebutt said as he snorted. “If it isn’t Crimson?” Swinebutt said. “What is this all about, you pig?” I asked. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about.” Swinebutt said, playing innocent. “Don’t play innocent with me! I know Officer Nickels works for you! What’s the catch?” I asked. “What catch? I’m just sitting here, minding my own business; something you should be doing.” Swinebutt said as he smirked at me and placed his pinky near his mouth. “Well…. You’re right; I should be minding my own business, but my friend Psyche is trying to run for mayor, and with Psyche’s arch-nemeses competing against him, it’s too much to be a coincidence.” I said. “Hey, I need Nickels to run for mayor, alright? I have an important job for him to do.” Swinebutt explained. “What? To ban pizza from Ponyville so you can put me out of business?” I asked. “It’s none of your business, Crimson!” Swinebutt said. “It is my business if it’s involved with my business!” I said. ”Look, I have better things to do right now. I have some loose-ends to tie up before trying to ruin your life again.” Swinebutt said. “Yeah, sure…. I totally believe you, brah!” I said sarcastically. “Good.” Swinebutt said as he snorted. “Now if you please, I have work to do!” “You think I was born yesterday, brah? You’ve ruined my life in Mareami, and you’re trying to ruin my life here too; you did that many times already!” I reminded him. “Oh yeah? Name them.” Swinebutt dared me. “Robo Trixie, Boorlie, CHAOS MOUNTAINS, Fonz Punkskull, Trottingham…. I can go on!” I explained. “Yeah, well.....” Swinebutt snorts. “I don’t have time for you right now. I’ll ruin your life some other day, Flare.” “Fine! But I have my eye on you, buster!” I warned him. “Oooooh, I’m so scared! How will I ever get to sleep at night?” Swinebutt said sarcastically. I just stared at him, and then I carefully walked away, looking back at him. I then went back to town hall where Nickels finished up his speech, and everypony cheered at him, louder than when they were cheering at Mare and Psyche. “What’s going on, brah?” I asked Psyche. ”Bad news, Flare! Nickel’s speech was impressive! Too impressive!” Psyche said. “What did he promise?” I asked. “He stole my idea of making a police force!” Psyche said. “Well, if he stole your idea, ponies shouldn’t vote for him, because they’d know it was your idea first.” I said. “No, he wants to make a police force out of robots!” Psyche said. “Robots, huh? Swinebutt knows how to make those.” I nodded. “He calls them Swinebots. Those were the things that constructed my shop, but I reprogrammed them for that, and then enemy Swinebots came in and trashed my shop when Fonz was in town.” “This doesn’t look good, Flare. He made so many other promises, I didn’t even think of!” Psyche said nervously. “Alright, clam down, brah!” I advised him. “I am cla- wait, ‘clam down’?” Psyche asked. “Yeah, clam down.” I said. “It’s ‘calm’ down.” Psyche corrected me. “I know, but I switched the L and the A, because I know that’s an easy typo to make.” I said. “Ok, I get it. It’s stupid, but…. I know you made stupider jokes than that. You’re clever.” Psyche said. Later that afternoon, Psyche and I joined up with Engie, Blaze, and Aqua over at the cider bar shortly after to talk about what’s going on. “So who’s this Penny Nickels guy anyway?” Engie asked. “Used to be a part of the THPD, the Trottingham police department.” Psyche explained. “He’s that pony that arrested ya and tried to steal yar family crest from yar mum’s grave, isn’t that correct?” Aqua asked. “Can we not mention my mother please?” Psyche asked. “I’m sorry, Psyche. I didn’t mean to offend ya.” Aqua said. “It’s ok, Aqua.” Psyche said. “So what’s this Nickels guy up to? Is he still working Swinebutt?” Blaze asked. “I assume so.” I said. “I found Swinebutt earlier today, and I know he’s up to something. Seeing both Nickels and Swinebutt is kinda fishy, don’t you think?” “You didn’t try to capture him?” Blaze asked. “Why should I? He used a weakness on me. He said I should be minding my own business, and I felt bad, so I just walked away.” I said. “Don’t let that pig tell ya what to do! He was interfering with yer business and yer life from day one, Flare!” Engie reminded me. “Even before ya moved to Ponyville, he was trying to make your life miserable, all because of ridiculous reasons that he gave you.” Aqua said. “Swinebutt can wait; we have to make sure either Psyche or Mare wins the next election.” Blaze said. “Mare is the reason that I got Psyche to join the election in the first place!” I said. “Better her than Nickels.” Blaze said. “I agree. It’s not about winning the election anymore. This has turned personal! We can’t let Nickels win!” Psyche said. “But Psyche, you wanted to make change in this town! Make the change that Mare wasn’t able to do!” I reminded me. “It doesn’t really bother me all that much, Flare. The only reason I got into the election is to make you satisfied!” Psyche corrected me. “Didn’t you WANT to be mayor? You did say that, brah!” I asked. “Yes, I do want to be mayor, but I’m not desperate for it!” Psyche said. “Psyche, you have to win! You have to! Nickels needs to be taken down!” I explained. “Yeah…. I do hate Nickels so much! He nearly stole from me my most prized family treasure! You’re right, Flare! Let’s win this thing!” Psyche said requesting a hoof-bump. “Alright! Fillies and gentlecolts, let’s pop!” I said as I bro-hooved him. “I got a very bad feeling about this.” Blaze said. Just then, Engie looks over at a giant robot-like thing on the bar with a mustache. "HEY, you!" Engie yelled at the robot that is revealed to be Engie's harvesting robot. The robot starts running away. "GET BACK HERE!" Engie starts chasing it out. A couple of days went by, and during those days, Psyche and I really had to do our best to make sure he wins! We were putting up signs all over town that say ‘If you know what freedom is like, you’d vote for Psyche’! I gotta say, Psyche is pretty creative! I dunno why he needed my help for creativity! For every pizza I sold at my shop, they get a free ‘Vote 4 Pedro Psyche’ sticker! I put up posters too, one of the posters has Psyche with an Uncle Sam outfit and it says ‘I want you, to vote who’s right! Which is Psyche!’ We even drew funny mustaches and clown noses on the posters of Mare and Nickels. We had so much fun! Days went by, and Princess Luna told us the scores so far. There were 9 votes for Mare, 16 votes for Nickels, and 22 votes for Psyche! “Psyche, isn’t this great? You’re winning!” I said. “You know what? I never thought I’d get this far! I couldn’ve done it without you, Flare!” Psyche said, patting me on the back. “No problemo, brah! I’m always there for you!” I said. ”I can’t believe this. I thought Ponyville loved me as their mayor. How can it all go so wrong?” Mare asked herself upsettingly. “Calm down, Mare. The election isn’t over yet.” Luna said. “This isn’t right. I’m doomed.” Mare said nervously. “Tonight is the night you talk to the undecided voters. The final votes will be counted tomorrow morning, and then we’ll have our new mayor!” Luna explained. “Ok…. Ok….. deep breathes….. deep breathes…..” Mare said, taking deep breathes, because she was really afraid she wasn’t going to win. Over behind some crates, Nickels hid behind them without anypony noticing and he activates his ear communicator. “Boss.” Nickels whispered. “What is it, Nickels?” Swinebutt asked. “This isn’t good! I’m down to second place behind Psyche! What are we going to do?” Nickels whispered. “Clam down, Nickels. Everything will be under control. Just hang in there.” Swinebutt advised him. “Did you just say ‘clam’ down?” Nickels asked. A few minutes went by, and the undecided voters gathered around town hall so they can talk to the candidates. Psyche, Nickels, and Mare went to their spots, and Luna started up the show. This conference just turned into a musical. Luna starts it off by playing a piano-guitar: “Welcome to the town hall debate, where ordinary ponies talk to the candidates!” Luna sang. “The fillies tell me, they like a stallion with insurance. So how do I get some, without paying a million bits for it? Tell me, who’s gonna work out, baby? Who’s gonna work it out?” Skyblaze sang. “This isn’t just a health issue, it’s an economic issue. This is money out of that family’s pocket.” Psyche sang. “If pony-care is implemented fully, it would be another 2,500 on top.” Officer Nickels sang. “You’ve seen health insurance premiums; gone up… incomes come down.” “I said that we would make sure that insurance companies can’t jerk you around.” Psyche sang. “What you gonna do?” Skyblaze sang. “We need to make sure our legal system works.” Nickels sang. “Oh, what you gonna do?” Luna sang. “Go after wannabee gangsters, we’re gonna get it done in a second term!” Psyche sang. “Oh, what you gonna do?” Skyblaze sang. “Take the money we’ve been spending on parasprites.” Mare sang. “More building.” Nickels sang. “Double our exports.” Mare sang. “Who’s gonna work it out, baby?” Skyblaze sang. “Gonna work it out?” Luna sang in the background during Skyblaze’s lyrics. “Who’s gonna work it out?” Skyblaze sang. “Since I got out of college, I’ve been living in Spark Note’s basement!” Mynx sang. “But we were roleplaying!” Spark Note reminded him. “How you going to give me a job before she goes totally ape stuff?” Mynx sang. “I already am!” Spark Note said. “Who’s gonna work it out, baby? Who’s gonna work it out?” Mynx sang. “Yeeeeaah!” Luna sang. “I want you to be able to get a job; I know what it takes… to make Ponyville the most attractive place, that’s why I wanna bring down the tax rates!” Psyche sang. “Low-skill jobs are not gonna come back, I want jobs with a high wage.” Mare sang. “If we’re adding to our deficits for tax cuts, we will lose that race!” “Just because I am a mare, my salary’s a little bit less…” Spark Note sang. “Ooo!” Luna cried. “How can every mare get equal-pay, and please stop looking at my chest.” Spark Note sang. “Tell me who’s gonna work it out, baby. Who’s gonna work it out.” “I had the chance to pull together a cabinet, I brought us binders full of mares; my boss said ‘I need be making dinner for my kids’; so we said fine.” Nickels sang. “My grandmother worked her way up to become the senator of Ponyville, but she hit the glass ceiling; now I’ve got a stallion-friend and I wanna make the same opportunities, anypony’s daughters have.” Mare sang. “What you gonna do?” Spark Note sang. “We need to make sure our legal system works.” Nickels sang. “Oh, what you gonna do?” Luna sang. “Go after wannabee gangsters, we’re gonna get it done in a second term!” Psyche sang. “Oh, what you gonna do?” Skyblaze sang. “Take the money we’ve been spending on parasprites.” Mare sang. “More building.” Nickels sang. “Double our exports.” Mare sang. “Who’s gonna work it out, baby?” Spark Note sang. “Who’s gonna work it out?” Luna sang backup to Spark Note’s. “Who’s gonna work it out?” Spark Note sang. “Yeaaaah!” Mynx sang. “From the space observer, we haven’t heard; any specifics beyond the herd.” Nickels sang. “That’s completely false!” Psyche cried. “Not true!” Nickels corrected him. “Absolutely true!” Psyche corrected him. “What is true?” Mare asked. “Woooo!” Luna concluded the song. So everypony clapped at the candidates just as the undecided voters got all the answers they need. “The booths are opened! Cast your final votes now!” Luna said, pointing to the voting booths with Spike on the table, passing out the papers and the ponies go into the booths to cast their votes. “We’ll be counting the votes and tomorrow morning we’ll have our new mayor!” So everypony casted their votes and went on home. I was about to leave, but I had to tell Psyche a couple of things first. “I see nothing but great things for you, ma boy!” I said. “Yeah well, tomorrow’s the big day!” Psyche said excitedly. “It sure is! Tomorrow will be the day of YOU becoming the new mayor of Ponyville!” I said. “I hope so.” Psyche nodded. “I’m gonna go get some rest for tomorrow.” “Alright, I’ll catch ya later, brah!” I said. So Psyche went on home, but not I. I had to stay and make sure Nickels or Swinebutt don’t think of trying anything. I got Spike to get some stuff at home so I can stay and keep watch. “Are you sure about this, Flare?” Spike asked. “I can’t let Nickels or Swinebutt try anything. They’re up to no good.” I said. “Also I don’t wanna walk home. It’s hard for me to walk.” “Just take off the peg leg then.” Spike suggested. “Nah. I look cool as a pirate.” I said. “I’d be protectin’ my booty.” “Do you have the booty?” Spike asked. “I doooooooo!” I said. “Alright, if you need any help. Call me.” Spike advised me. “I’ll be fine, brah.” I said, taking a seat on my lounge chair, drinking some soda so I can stay awake. Nickels and Swinebutt were nowhere to be found that night, and suddenly I got a little drowsy, but I kept telling myself I had to stay awake! I had to do this, for Psyche, and for the fate of Ponyville, but I couldn’t make it, so I fell asleep. The time was 5 AM and Swinebutt got up early so he can change the votes. He snuck into the voting booths and tried to change the votes, but the system was password protected. It took him an hour to finally hack in, but luckily, in case the system gets hacked, I have a little alarm system on my cell phone to wake me up in case something happens. I woke up a little while after, and just as Swinebutt was changing the votes, I walk inside to stop him. “Cheat much?” I asked. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Swinebutt said. “What’s done is done! The voting booths are closed, and today, Psyche will become our new mayor!” I said. “Well, even though Psyche had the most votes, I won’t let him win! Nickels is becoming the new Ponyville mayor, and there’s not a thing you can do to stop me!” Swinebutt said. “So let me get this straight… Psyche got the most votes?” I asked. “Not for long!” Swinebutt said, still changing the votes around. “So Psyche won! I knew he could do it!” I cried in excitement. “It doesn’t matter. Nickels is becoming our mayor, and I’ll destroy both your life, and Boorlie’s!” Swinebutt said. “You’re still mad at Boorlie for stealing your business, huh?” I asked. “Yeah…. Do you need to always point out the obvious?” Swinebutt asked. “You can’t get away by cheating! Cheaters never win! Step away from the panel, Doctor!” I demanded as my horn starting glowing. “Make me!” Swinebutt yelled as he snorts and places his pinky near his mouth. I was about to fire my laser blast spell at him, but he tackles me, and we start fighting in the booth; we fought so much that the booth started jumping and tilting about. We were fighting so loud too that it made chicken sounds and horn sounds and cat sounds and dolphin sounds and lots of other random sound effects. Little did we know though that ponies woke up early so they’d get good spots for a clear show to see who the winner is. The ponies were looking over at one of the voting booths to see what the racket was, and even Luna was on the scene. “What is going on here?” Luna asked. Swinebutt and I bursted out of the booth, and continued to punch eachother. “OW! MY GOOD EYE!” I yelled. “Ha! I blinded you! Whatcha gonna do about it now, Crimson?” Swinebutt asked mischievously. Just then, I moved my eye patch from the left side of my eye to the right to cover the wound. “There! All better!” I said excitedly. Luna then suddenly broke up our fight using her magic. “Explain this!” Luna demanded. “FLARE TRIED TO CHEAT! I saw him! Psyche sent him to cheat!” Swinebutt lied. “No I didn’t! Swinebutt is trying to make Nickels win, and then destroy my business!” I said. “… And Boorlie’s.” Swinebutt added. ”I was only there to stop him!” I said. “NO! I was trying to stop you! You knew were the cheater, Flare! You were laying outside all night, waiting for your chance to go win the easy way!” Swinebutt fibbed. “Luna, you know that is not true. You know me!” I pleaded. Luna took a deep breath, she released us both, and said; “I made my decision.” Everypony was very nervous of the suspense. “I hereby disqualify Penny Nickels and Psyche Illusion from the election.” “WHAT?!” Nickels yelled. “I somewhat knew this was going to happen.” Psyche said, facehoocing herself. “So, by the power of Equestria, and the Elements of Harmony; I hereby declare Mare the winner of this election. “Wow! I can’t believe it! I could’ve sworn I was going to lose!” Mare said in relief. “Aww c’mon, Luna!” I complained. “No c’mons, Flare Gun. I made my choice.” Luna said making her final decision and trots away. “It is so good to be back to my old post again! Being a mayor is all that I’m good at anyway.” Mare said. “Yeah, you deserved it. Congratulations!” Psyche said to her. “Yeah, perhaps I was a little harsh to you before.” I said to her. “You do a great job running this town, and I’ll accept any position you give me!” “Well, to be honest, Flare, you’re right. We should have the right to make our own decisions. Next Winter Wrap-Up, everypony can get whatever post they want!” Mare said. “That’s awesome! Thanks!” I said gratefully. “It was Twlight’s idea for us to get organized like this in the first place. I thought it was a good idea.” Mare said. “Tis true.” I nodded. “Congrats on the election, and I wish you best of lucks, sista!” “Thank you, Mr. Gun!” Mare said. “Now as for you, Swinebu-“ I turned around to give them a message, but Swinebutt and Nickels were already gone. So instead, I turned to Psyche. “Hey, brah?” Psyche just ignored me and trotted away. I knew he was mad at me because he thought I cheated for him. I know I risked my friendship with him…. Again, I had to do what was right for the town. Perhaps I made the wrong choice. Later that night, I sat down at the cider bar, alone, and depressed, until Princess Luna came in and ordered a cider. “Hello, Flare Gun!” she said. ”Hey.” I said. “You guessing that you should’ve thought twice about what you done?” Luna asked. “I always skip to conclusions, you know? I’m the particular pony I sworn to never be! I screwed up!” I complained. “We all make mistakes, Flare. That’s what makes us equal.” Luna said. “But I swear, I did not cheat! Psyche was going to win anyway, but Swinebutt was trying to change it!” I explained. “I know, Flare Gun. I know.” Luna said, drinking the cider she just got. “Thank you!” “So if you knew I didn’t, why did you disqualify Psyche?” I asked. “Because I didn’t want to be mayor in the first place anyway.” Psyche said, sitting down next to me. “So why did you join the election?” I asked. “I wanted to be mayor at first, but I thought it over, and it looks like hard work, and you know what? Mare is the right pony for the job, so she deserves the post.” “But what about the taxes, and the things you wanted to change?” I asked. “Mare agreed on the suggestion box idea.” Psyche said. “But Psyche, I have to know…. did you actually think I cheated?” I asked. “At first, yes. I know you were desperate on wanting me to be mayor, but I was thinking and, well…. I forgot who we’re dealing with. I saw Dr. Swinebutt with you and we all know how that pig is.” Psyche said. “I mean, if it was anypony else in there with you, I’d actually think you’re cheating. But with Swinebutt, heh, I kinda figured you were trying to stop him. So you’re off the hook.” “OOOOH! That’s what I was forgetting! I knew I forgot something with all this pirate gear.” I just remembered. “How about one of those annoying talking parrots?” Luna asked. “Meh… I tried to rent one, but all the parrot could say was ‘bonjour stupid’.” I said. “I understand.” Luna nodded. “Psyche I didn’t mean to force you to become mayor. I guess I was just so angry at the position Mare gave me during Winter Wrap-Up that I needed somepony to take her place; and you, you’re the best there is!” I explained. “I know. No need to brag about it.” Psyche teased, and laughed. “But I’m still mad at Cadance though.” I added. “I know, and that…. I could care less about.” Psyche said. So, we had a great night, the three of us. We overdid it on the ciders though, and Engie's harvesting robot kinda crashed the party. Heh! Well, Swinebutt and Nickels got away again. “I can’t believe you screwed us up!” Swinebutt yelled at Nickels. “That was your fault! Everypony saw YOU cheat! Don’t blame me for something I didn’t do!” Nickels yelled. “And that’s why you’re off the hook.” Swinebutt said. “But I didn’t- Ok, fine…. Whatever.” Nickels said. “Don’t worry; I had second thoughts about this plan anyway. I have developed a new plan, and we’re just trying to ruin Flare’s life, but I know how much Flare hates it when his friends are part of this.” Swinebutt said. “So what are you planning on next, boss?” Nickels asked. “This plan should work, but I’ll need to make preparations back at HQ. We’ll also need to call upon some old friends to help with the job.” Swinebutt said mischievously as he snorted and placed his pinky near his mouth. “So you’re gonna go all Dr. Evil?” Nickels asked. “I am nowhere close to Dr. Evil! Don’t compare me to him!” Swinebutt demanded. What is Swinebutt planning on now? Well, we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. Also, it seems this was a successful session of the Friendship is Epic challenge! I must admit it was very challenging when it was still snowing but after the wrap-up, I was good! Ok maybe that was a little too easy. I’m going to think of something harder for the next session. Let me know if you have any recommendations!