//------------------------------// // Transitions, Part Three // Story: Beauty Is Where You Find It // by Verdigris //------------------------------// Chapter 22 (((()))) “So let's leave it alone, 'cause we can't see eye to eye. There ain't no good guys, there ain't no bad guys. There's only you and me and we just disagree.” – Billy Dean, Dave Mason, We Just Disagree (Fire In The Dark), (Let It Flow) (((()))) The next morning found Verdigris up early, out on his balcony and waiting for the sun. There were things he needed to do, but they’d wait until the rest of the Palace and Canterlot were awake. It was time for a little introspection. What the hay’s wrong with me? I can’t seem to go more than a few days without butting heads with somepony. Why? Am I so sure I’m right that I can’t listen, or don’t they get it? He shook his head. That can’t be it; I’ve made plenty of bone-headed moves, and Ivan’s right, up to a point. Is he too cautious, or am I really reckless? I can’t tell, and I ought to be able to. He looked east as the sky lightened. What am I missing? The sun’s limb broke over the horizon as he thought the last, and Celestia’s voice came to him. Perspective, Verdigris. You’ve done all right so far, but you need to learn more. You’re still only sixteen. You need a few more years, and more experience. He looked down and nodded. It’s nothing to be ashamed about; it’s not about arrogant pride. It’s about point of view. You make it look so easy, god-Dam. I keep thinking I can do the same thing, but I’ve got to admit I can’t. I keep forgetting I don’t know it all, even though I know more than most ponies. I know I’m hot-headed compared to some, but I’m not that bad. Am I? He felt her smile. Not that bad, but you’ve got to work on your temper. You can’t take everything personally. It’s not all about you, me, Luna or any pony. It’s all about everypony and everything. The sun cleared the horizon, and she asked, Will I see you for breakfast? I’ll be there. I can’t let the maneuvering get to me, can I? Cultivating serenity and patience is necessary. Remember the teasing you got in Oceanside? Do I ever. Bluestreak’s sneering face appeared in his mind. Think of it in those terms. They’re trying to provoke you, just to prove to themselves they can manipulate you, however mildly. You can’t let them get to you, whoever they might be. If you’re perturbed, you can’t think straight. It’s that simple. He nodded, and smiled at the sky. You really do make it look so easy. It’s burden I must bear, she replied with pensive amusement. I’ve had endless practice. I’ll see you in a little while. Good morning. Contact faded, and he watched the city wake up. “Verdigris? How art thou?” He looked up to see Luna hovering above him, her expression concerned. “Better. Talking with her after a good night’s sleep usually straightens me out.” Luna descended and nuzzled him. “I am gladdened. Last night was illuminating, especially after the song. I believe we had no idea.” “I didn’t want you to worry. Stupid of me, ‘cause I know you will anyway.” He put a wing over her, and the Princess leaned against him. “I’m a stubborn, head-strong Coast pony. That’s never gonna change.” She nodded. “Nor should thou. ‘Twould be wrong. All ponies are needed, regardless of their natures.” They stood there for a few minutes, and she said, “We must below. Breakfast.” Verdigris nuzzled her. “I’d be honored if you’ll allow me to escort you.” “Aye, I would like that very much.” She stepped back when he folded his wing, and let him precede her to the door. “Wait. Wear the Indigo. Methinks there should be another disturbance of the nobles’ smug surety.” Verdigris smiled. “I like how your mind malfunctions,” he said. He donned his armor, including the wing blades. “Ready.” He glanced at his reflection in the glass. “No, I don’t think they’re ready to know.” “What?” Luna gasped when his coat shifted to black. “Oh, my. Nay, verily they are not. Stormhawk should remain in the shadows, lest they make the connection, Verdigris. ‘Tis enough we know. They would react … badly.” He changed back. “Not unless it has to happen.” He walked to the door, opened it and nodded. “After you.” Luna smiled, nodded and walked out. Blaze started when he saw her, and asked, “Your Highness?” His tone asked a dozen questions. “How now, Blaze? Am I not free to move about as I please? Am I not permitted visitation? May I not combine them as is my wont?” Luna’s eyes danced merrily at his surprise. “Am I not a Princess?” “I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting to see you.” “Nopony expects a Princess’ visita—Ow!” Verdigris said as Luna kicked his shin. “Okay, maybe that was too much.” “Verily?” Luna asked with a mean little smile. “A Prince also has duties. Remember, thou wilt be treated as such in the future.” “And everypony wonders why I’m the Reluctant Prince,” he muttered. “Okay, enough shenanigans. Let’s go, Blaze. Breakfast.” “You got it, Boss. Princess?” He stepped back and bowed slightly, then fell in behind them. This should be good. (((()))) Celestia and most of the nobles were seated, waiting for Luna and Verdigris, the nobles impatiently, Celestia with a sense of anticipation she couldn’t explain. I wonder if those two are up to something, she thought. That’s the only way I can explain this feeling. Her curiosity was soon satisfied, much to her secret delight, when the doors opened and they walked in. Verdigris wore the Indigo, and there was a shocked silence when the nobles recognized it. The only way to make it “better” would be if he was “blacked out”. I considered it, but Luna talked me out of it, Verdigris told her silently. They’re not ready for that. “Is that – the Indigo?” Everypony looked at Tornado Kicker, who had been invited a week earlier. His eyes spoke volumes about his surprise. “I never thought I’d see it,” he finished, looking at Celestia. “It’s time to see it again,” Celestia answered. “Long past, some could say.” “The Hawks still exist?” a deep blue Unicorn asked skeptically. “That can’t be. They were wiped out.” “You’re wrong, Azure Sky, ” Shining replied. As usual, you nitwit, he thought scathingly. “The Hawks maintain,” Luna pronounced. “I have been a Hawk for o’er a millennium.” She looked at Verdigris. “Verdigris is the newest. Goshawk’s legacy continues.” “So was Stormhawk,” the Unicorn persisted angrily. “He was dealt with,” Verdigris said as he and Luna continued to their seats. “The Aerie is still going strong. They weren’t wiped out, they withdrew.” No forgiveness, Azure? He barely touched your family, he thought. “Why, if I may ask?” Fleur said. “If your Clan had that kind of traitor in it, you would,” Tornado replied. “Stormhawk was the worst.” He looked at Luna apologetically as she sat beside her sister, and Verdigris sat beside Twilight. “No offense, Highness.” “None taken. He hid his tendencies well; neither Celly nor myself saw him for what he was,” she replied calmly. “Well, we can take some reassurance that his line is gone,” Azure said with far too much satisfaction. Strangely enough, Blueblood stayed quiet, though he stared. Verdigris caught Celestia’s eye and raised an eyebrow, asking a silent question. She gave him the barest of nods, her eyes holding a subtle warning. “I wouldn’t say that,” he replied neutrally as he ordered breakfast. He met Luna’s gaze. It has to come out some time. Might as well be now. She barely nodded. “Oh? And how would you know that?” Azure asked condescendingly. “He had no offspring.” “Wrong. When I restored the Aerie’s archives, I learned he had five foals. Not all the mares were exactly willing, except Aurora’s mother. She thought she could ‘fix’ him.” He snorted. “Yeah, right.” “What? Why would they hide that?” Blueblood asked. Tornado snorted. “Would you tell a war-weary, half-hysterical country the Hawks Traitor had had foals? I don’t know about you, but I know that wouldn’t have gone over well. I read about the Blood-letting, and I’m sure other Clans would have gone for all-out extermination.” “And the reason I found out is I’m his direct descendant, Azure.” Everypony save the Princesses stared at him, incredulous. “No, I’m not going to follow in his hoof-steps. The past is dead and so is he, and that’s how it’s going to stay." “There’s more, but that’s not a subject for breakfast,” Celestia said, stopping the conversation. “Let it lie.” Everypony enjoyed their breakfast in silence, at least until Tornado cleared his throat, looked at Verdigris and said, “About Stallkhovich. I know something about his past, and I’d like to talk with you about it, your H – ” “Don’t go there,” Verdigris growled. “Unlike the Princesses, I’m not taking on a role I don’t want until I have no choice. Until that time, my name is Verdigris.” His eyes flashed slightly. “Understood, Ell-cee?” Kicker’s eyes narrowed, and he smiled thinly. This is more like it. “As you say, Verdigris.” “Thank you.” Verdigris glanced at Celestia, who merely shrugged. Maybe he’s having more of an effect than I thought, he told her silently. That could be, but I doubt it. You’re not going to stop being the Reluctant Prince, even after the Threshold, I suspect, she replied. Never mind. Just enjoy breakfast. You’ve got refresher training, remember? Right. Something to look forward to. Luna glanced at Tornado, wondering why he was here. He was Shining’s second-in-command, and Kicker Clan leader, thus giving him more duties than usual. Unless something important has come up, she thought. Celly? Why is Tornado Kicker here? I thought he should meet Verdigris, and I need to discuss further actions against the Griffins, if necessary. They’re not a threat, and I want it to stay that way, and try not to ruin our fragile treaties. They’d make good allies, if they’d tone it down, the Solar Diarch replied. Luna nodded, keeping her skeptical thoughts to herself. Mayhap something has changed, she thought. Breakfast continued. Verdigris and Twilight made small talk, catching up on past events, though he refused to discuss some things at the table. “Later, after I’m done with the Guards,” he said. Twilight sighed and nodded. When everypony had finished, Verdigris stood and escorted Luna out; Tornado escorted Celestia while Shining escorted Twilight. When they exited, the Captain said, “You’re going to be on time, I hope.” Verdigris smiled nastily. “Only if Luna’s finished with me.” Tornado stared, while Twilight face-hoofed. “As tempting as that may be, thou art not required to tuck me into bed,” Luna said with an evil grin. Celestia didn’t react, other than her eyes glinting with amusement. “We will part at the staircase.” She nodded to the others. “Good day.” As they walked away, Tornado asked in confusion, “Was that real, or were they just having fun with us?” “Oh, they were having fun,” Shining replied. He tilted his head to one side. “I’m trying to decide if it’ll be better when he decides he’s a Prince, or if he’ll drive us crazy.” “That won’t be a problem,” Celestia replied. “You should get ready, Captain. Twilight and I will be all right, at least until she has to return to Ponyville.” She looked at Tornado. “I believe you and I should discuss Ivan before informing anypony else.” Kicker nodded. “Then let’s go. Time and tide wait for nopony.” Shining bowed and trotted away. “Shall we?” (((()))) After seeing Luna on her way, Verdigris returned to his rooms and stood on the balcony for a few minutes before doffing the Indigo and donning the armor he’d found waiting for him. It wasn’t Guard armor, exactly; it wasn’t Patrol, either. It was plain, bright steel, and made in what he’d have to call “generic” form. Just what the buck is it supposed to be? he wondered as he looked at himself in the mirror. It’s not Guard – whoa, he thought as the armor changed form and color to match. Oh, I think I get it. Indigo. The armor changed again, matching his armor from the Aerie perfectly. Patrol, he thought, and it shifted to the sea foam and silver, bare-bones armor of the Patrol. “Wow. This is fantastic. Whose idea was it?” Since you may end up wearing many hats, this should help, Celestia replied. And I know you might think it’s too much, but I did say I’d help where I could. I couldn’t be there as much as either of us probably wanted, but I can relieve you of any financial hardship. Good armor is expensive, and since you’re determined to be one of Luna’s, I couldn’t see making you have more than one suit. This should do, and it will help keep your anonymity, though I believe that’s becoming an exercise in futility, god-son. You’re going to be known, like it or not. Try to learn to enjoy it. You know better, he replied. I’ll get used to it, but I won’t enjoy it. Like I told Luna, I wasn’t born for this. I’ll try, but I can’t promise I’ll ever be comfortable. Fair enough. Oh, there’s one more pattern you should try. I think you’ll like it, she answered, her smile coming through. And that is? Think about it. That should be more than enough. I’ll see you afterwards; we need to talk about your plans for the immediate future. Contact ended, and Verdigris nodded. He walked over to the mirror, cycling through the color schemes, and it occurred to him. Night, he thought. He was suddenly wearing Luna’s livery, and he studied his reflection for a few minutes, a slow smile appearing. “I definitely like it,” he murmured to himself as he inspected the shoes. He glanced up, and was startled to see how much he resembled Stormhawk. He shook his head and looked away. “Okay, that image I didn’t need.” He walked out, his thoughts troubled. (((()))) Celestia and Tornado stood side-by-side on her balcony, looking out as they talked. “You’re sure?” he asked. “Absolutely, Tornado,” she replied. “I know of his history, but there are a few things I don’t know. His childhood is a complete mystery to me, and he refuses to discuss it. There’s another incident he won’t talk about, either, and I think it’s where his leadership issues come from. It must have been painful, and I can’t have that interfering with his duties.” Celestia sighed and looked out over the city. “That’s why I made him take a leave of absence until Verdigris goes to Ponyville, and then home. They just don’t see eye-to-eye on some issues; unfortunately, he views my god-son as he does Luna and I, and that just won’t fly. Verdigris bristles at the idea of what he calls running to and hiding behind me, and I don’t blame him. He’s a natural leader, but you wouldn’t know by looking at him.” “And Stallkhovich’s concerns are all over-blown?” “So far, yes. He’s right about magical and technical advancements, but what he showed me makes no sense. Those devices were rejected as being too dangerous, especially the backpack rocket. We lost three Pegasai before that project was scrapped, and the injuries were appalling. I can’t believe the Griffins would use them. They’re not that crazy, and we’re still something like allies,” Celestia replied. “He makes every threat out to be a potential catastrophe, and uses that to justify us staying back, far behind the lines. That’s why I’m wondering about his mental health and stability. He’s over-protective of us, and believes the Guard can handle every threat. That’s impossible, and he should know it, and nothing he warned me about ever materialized. That and more is why I’m going to order him into Counseling. He has to deal with his issues before they become unmanageable.” Kicker nodded. “I think I see where he’s coming from, but I’d have to check into a few things. I kind of understand. He wants to protect you. Hay, I feel the same about Cloud, even though she’s more than capable of taking care of herself.” He shrugged. “I don’t know why she ran out, but I supported her decision and I’m proud of her accomplishments.” He looked out thoughtfully. “The Guard is a serious commitment, and I think it just hit her all at once.” “I’ll leave that to you. At the moment, everything is calm, and I want it to stay that way. Check into his more credible scenarios, but don’t spend more time than is prudent.” She looked out, then smiled. “Enough business. How are Nimbus and Alula?” “Doing as well as can be expected. Alula’s a hoof-full, but then most fillies her age are.” He paused, then continued, “Nimbus is the same. Nothing changes.” “You know the rumors about Cloud’s departure affecting your position are untrue.” Celestia stood straight, affecting a cool, disdainful manner. “I do not allow my Guards to play politics. If I find it’s so, there will be new openings, and fast.” “No, don’t. It’s her opinion, and that won’t change right away. Please let it be.” Celestia’s expression softened. “Very well, I shall. Is there anything else to report?” “Besides Stallkhovich, no.” Tornado paused, looking out over the city. “So, what about Verdigris should I know, other than what I found in records, and that surprise he dropped on us?” “He’s very self-determined, and tends to keep his thoughts and feelings to himself, unless it’s important. That’s from being an Oceanside and Patrol pony, as well as his ancestry. He wasn’t joking about being Stormhawk’s descendant. I didn’t want to tell him, but he asked, and I couldn’t refuse.” “I can’t see that being a problem, Commander.” When she glared at him, he added, “Despite what’s attached to the title, we Kickers don’t think of you as anything else, Celestia. Where you lead, we will follow, no questions asked. We know you won’t steer us wrong.” When Celestia nodded, he continued, “Our ancestors may affect us, but only as much as we’ll let them.” He looked down as the Guards made their way out to the practice field; Verdigris was obvious, if only for his size. “I’ll have to see more of him before I can make an assessment, but I think he’ll be fine.” “Thank you, for your candor and honesty, Tornado.” She looked down as the training started, and winced a few times when Verdigris used what he’d learned, not only at the Aerie, but throughout his life. “That’s got to hurt.” “Aye, it will. It’ll teach them to hold back,” Tornado replied. “Hmm, interesting use of the Hammer Wing. Oh, that was nasty.” He clicked his tongue. “Good thing they’re wearing horn guards.” (((()))) Verdigris returned to his rooms after seeing that the ponies he’d trounced were all right. None of them took it personally, and returned the favor when they could. Both he and they learned a few things in the process, which was good all around. When he entered, he removed his armor and took a long, hot shower, both to clean up and relieve the tension and aches. He still couldn’t believe Tango got through his defenses so easily, but he’d learned from it. He stood in the shower, letting the heat soak in. “Verdigris?” Twilight’s voice said. “In here,” he called. “I’ll be out in a few minutes.” “Okay. I brought lunch,” she replied. Verdigris finished up, dried off and groomed himself, then exited to find Twilight, Honey and Grass at the table. “Lunch” looked more like a banquet. “Hey, good to see everypony.” He trotted over and gave his loves heart-felt hugs and kisses, and nuzzled his friend. “I missed you all. How’s ‘Feather?” “Good. You know about her school time, but she’s getting back into the swing of things,” Grass replied. Verdigris looked at her questioningly, with his head tilted to one side. “Does that mean what I think it means? She’s seeing somepony?” “Yes. She sometimes goes on double-dates with your mom,” Honey answered. “She seems happier than I can remember. She’s still a little thin, but that’s going away. I think I can relax.” “Good.” He turned to Twilight after enjoying his perch. “Okay, I think I owe you a few answers, Twi.” “Well, maybe not. I read the copy of the Archives you sent while you were working out.” She stopped and looked at him steadily, but there was a touch of nervousness. “Did you really – ?” “Yes,” he said, stopping her short. “There was no way I was going to let Tatya die.” He took a breath and let it out slowly. “I know a little more about why I’m the way I am, so I have to work on anger management.” “She’s just a friend, right?” He nodded. “I’d hate to see what you’d do if somepony came after us,” Sea Grass said after a few false-starts. “I’m pretty sure the closer a pony is to me the worse it’ll be,” he replied softly. “If they do, somepony’s probably gonna die, Grass.” He paused, closed his eyes and grimaced. “If one of you dies, I won’t stop until I turn the ground a hundred yards around them into glass.” Twilight gasped; she’d read the few accounts of the Glasslands that had survived the passage of time. “Y-you can’t mean that.” “Why not? Do you think Celestia was in a good place mentally when that happened? I know she wasn’t. She was somewhere between utter despair, absolute rage and total madness, and she wasn’t much different when Luna was banished. She blamed the nobles for pushing her into that, and the toll was pretty gruesome. I don’t know how true that is, but I wouldn’t be surprised to find out there’s something to it.” Verdigris looked out the balcony doors for a moment. “I know what keeps her awake at night; I see and dream it, too.” Honey Bunch shuddered. She’d listened to Celestia sometimes when she was having bad dreams, and it sounded horrible. They’d talked, but even then Celestia didn’t open up completely. She vaguely understood after what Verdigris had done a few months ago. “But you’re better, now, right?” Grass asked, almost pleadingly. “Now, yeah. I guess I’d better tell you all of it.” Verdigris told them about Archer, what little he knew about her team, and the Speaker. “Somepony’s really mad at me, ‘cause the word is Archer’s never involved unless it’s personal. The problem is, I can’t think of who it might be. I’ve pissed-off a lot of ponies.” “You had reasons for what you did, Verdi,” Twilight said pointedly. “Maybe, but they’re worried about me for good reason, Twi. So far, everything has escalated, just like Ivan said. I’m gonna go too far one of these days, and it’ll be worse once I cross that final Threshold.” He looked at his plate bleakly. “You know how that feels, knowing what might happen?” “Might happen, not will happen,” Grass said. “Nopony knows what the future brings.” “Luna said about the same thing, but that didn’t make me feel better, either. I’ve gotta be careful, ‘cause you can’t call back a power bolt.” Twilight looked at him steadily for a moment, then nodded. They ate in silence for a while, just enjoying each other’s company, when a knock startled them. “You’re not expecting anypony, are you?” “No.” He closed his eyes and concentrated, then smiled. “Come in, god-mother.” The door opened and Celestia walked in. “What is it?” “I can’t say,” she replied, looking apologetically at the mares. Ivan. You need to know. “May I join you? It appears you have more food than you can possibly eat.” Verdigris pinned Twilight with a gimlet stare. “Yeah, if I was the suspicious type, I’d say somepony knew ahead of time,” he said with over-done sarcasm. Instead of ducking her head, she stuck out her tongue, and he chuckled. “Okay, I guess that means ‘Shut up and eat’.” Celestia chuckled and joined them. “So, how do you like the armor?” Verdigris smiled broadly. “Good. As I told you, owning more than one suit can be nigh-on impossible, and that’s only the expense. Imagine the up-keep.” “What do you mean, Princess?” “Well, Verdigris is Patrol, and a Hawk, Twilight. That’s two. Add his Cadet and Guard armor, then his Night Guard armor, and I think you see what I mean. Plus, on top of all that, his size.” Celestia gently shook her head. “Five suits for one very large pony would be nearly ten thousand bits. Ridiculously expensive. Then he’d have to maintain and polish it; Guard and Patrol ponies have to look their best, and the Hawks took it to the same level of near-obsession as the Kickers. He’d have no time for much else than eating, sleeping, duty and maintenance. He wants a life, but that will make it extremely difficult.” Sparkle’s eyes widened considerably. “Wow. Can’t a suit be re-used?” “Some, but it would have to be adjusted. Not mine, though,” Verdigris replied. “You could almost fit two ponies in the crupper. No, I’m kidding, but there’s a lot of work involved.” “So how do you have five suits? I only see two.” “Well, it’s been specially enchanted to change,” he said. “I don’t know what was done, but it’s even more expensive than the five would be.” “And you’re worth it,” Celestia told him seriously. “If you’re going to do what I think you will, you’ll need to wear many hats.” “Do?” Honey Bunch asked. “I won’t ask him to leave the Patrol, and I discussed a Clan Adjutant with Golden Eagle. Guess whose name came up,” she said with a mischievous smile as Verdigris glared at her. “He’ll have to have Cadet armor for the Academy, plus his regular and ceremonial Guard armor. On top of that, Luna’s Guards wear a distinctive type and form. That’s eight suits.” She turned to Twilight. “His Patrol armor is in Oceanside, so he owns three.” “Eight? Where’s the two we missed?” Grass asked. “Standard and ceremonial Night Guards, and standard and Adjutant Indigo,” Verdigris said. “I’m not getting out of it, am I?” “We all serve Equestria in one way or another, god-son,” she said softly. He nodded and accepted a nuzzle. “You’ll do all right. Golden’s still not very happy with you, but she’s pleased with the idea. You did a lot of good, and she appreciates it.” Lunch continued quietly, and when they were finished, Grass and Honey nuzzled Verdigris after they collected the dishes, and went back to work. Twilight stayed a little longer, mostly to inspect Verdigris’ armor, then left to get ready to return to Ponyville. When they were alone, Celestia said, “I know you’re upset with Ivan, and you think he’s clueless, but he has his reasons. His life wasn’t very good before he came to Canterlot. I don’t know the particulars, but he grew up in a less than loving household; I could tell that much. While he’s off duty, he’ll go into counseling, and it’s not optional.” She looked at Verdigris long enough to for him to understand that applied to him as well. “I can’t have divisiveness here in Canterlot, least of all in the Guards. As much as you hate the idea, we still have to pander to an image. We didn’t want it, but as I said, it was easier than arguing, and it helped solidify what started on Hearth’s Warming.” She gave a helpless shrug with her wings. “We didn’t really have a choice.” He nodded. “I get that, but I could do without a lot of the pomp. Luna might enjoy it a little, but I know you don’t.” He sighed and looked at his armor. “You need somepony you can trust, and I understand that. I asked Blaze to help with the potential threat to my family and friends here, for the same reason.” He tilted his head to one side. “Is he permanently assigned to me? I can’t have him shadowing me when I join the Guard. It wouldn’t look right.” “Every Commander has his or her adjutant,” she replied with a knowing smile. Verdigris face-hoofed, then looked at her with foal’s eyes. “Do I have to?” he whined half-seriously. When she nodded, he said, “Well, okay.” He shook his head slowly in wonder. “You really make it look so easy.” “You’ll learn.” She sighed. “You’ll have to. Maybe you can still go and do what you feel you have to alone, but we need the solidarity. Not just for outsiders, but our ponies. They need to feel safe and secure. It’s what Michael said. I think it went, ‘Sometimes you have to give up something so those you’re responsible for can have and enjoy it.’ Something like that.” Verdigris nodded. “I read it in his memoirs, and I understand. I don’t want Oceanside turning into another Stalliongrad, and, well, I hate bullies.” He paused, then added, “‘Nopony should have to face the fear or the darkness alone’.” “Yes, that and more.” She looked at him assessingly. “I know it’s a lot, but I wouldn’t ask if I thought you couldn’t handle it. Take it just seriously enough to stay focused. Don’t worry about anypony’s opinion if you don’t have to. We’re doing it for them, even if it doesn’t always look like it. Not everypony can be brilliant at all times.” Her smile flickered briefly. “Even Twilight has her lapses, and she’s the smartest pony I’ve ever met.” “Well, I’m glad you think so highly of me. I’ll try to live up to it.” He glanced at the door. “What about Ivan?” “He’s not your problem, right now. Now then, I think there’s more you’ve got to do with the Guard. Slope’s about to demonstrate, and she’ll need a sparring partner.” He smiled. “With pleasure, god-Dam. See you for dinner.” He nuzzled her as they stood, and she left with a smile. He walked to his armor and smiled. “Yeah, this is gonna be fun,” he said as he began putting it on. “Should literally set somepony on their ear.” (((()))) Ivan sat in his aunt and uncle’s upscale bar, The Bantered Mare, nursing his beer. He was thinking about what he’d said to Luna, Celestia and Verdigris the night before, and felt guilty. While he knew what he’d said was correct, the source of his guilt was the timing. Yes, he thought to himself. Very bad timing – no, it was atrocious. Yes, the perfect word, and she warned me about that. He felt a shadow come over him and looked up to to see his uncle Nikolai wiping a glass he had just picked up. Nikolai peered at his nephew with concern. “What is matter, Ivan? You have cloud over your head so black it blocks the sunshine.” Ivan looked at his uncle, and remembered Nikolai had a way finding out things that were kept from him. He sighed. “Princesses Celestia and Luna, and a pony named Verdigris are pissed at me.” (((()))) While returning to her office, Celestia heard Ivan speak her name and “looked” to see him talking to another pony, a trusted relative, no doubt. Despite her mild anger, she chose to listen to what they were saying. She suspected Luna was, too. (((()))) When Ivan finished, Nikolai said something completely off the wall. “Is not Mareamar, and Princesses aren't Captain Fire Flash, мальчик. Get that mare out your head. She's dead.” “What? This has nothing to do with her,” Ivan said in surprise. “нет?” Nikolai said, raising his eyebrows. “Be surprised if you come away from this with hide intact, сынок." "I fail to see how Fire Flash is the source," Ivan said stubbornly. “Because were standing next to her when Griffin took her head, maybe? Ivan, you gotta understand. Our Princesses are years and years old; have seen more than we can ever understand and are still around today. Yes, you want our Princesses safe, and don't want them to die, but you think Death could touch them? Have to understand, they not like us and never will be. Heart was in right place, but words and timing were terrible.” Ivan looked away. “No I don't. I've seen what can happen when a popular leader is killed. It can have demoralizing affect on the troops below him or her, but Celestia and Luna are our rulers. If they’re killed, it affects the entire nation. As per my job, I keep track of improving or emerging magical talents, spells and technological development in other nations, and what I'm seeing concerns me.” Nikolai poked him in the chest with a hoof. “Like your aunt Sasha, a worry wart, да? You know how she gets. Take my advice, lad. Take the heat. Celestia is forgiving. Believe Luna is too, but only after she bucks you around some. Believe once their anger has cooled, may even agree with you on some level.” Nikolai poked him again. “And never forget, your early life has effect. Could have strangled Grigoriy when you appeared on door-step half-starved, cold and filthy. Will never forget what he and Nadia did, and never forgive. You deserved better.” He shook his head. “Was worse for Ravenna, and – well, know what came later.” Ivan sighed. Nikolai was right, but he was sure the threat was real. Unless the “sun drop” was an illusion. Was any of it even real? he thought. He shook his head. I’ll have to check that again – thoroughly – to make absolutely sure. “I’d rather not talk about that. It still hurts.” The older Pegasus nodded. “да, hurt never goes, Ivan. Still angry, after time that has passed. Never forgive a wrong, but not let it rule your life. Will kill you.” He nodded again, emphatically. Ivan, I’d like to speak with you, Celestia’s voice said, startling him. Nikolai looked at him in puzzlement, and his nephew mouthed “Celestia”; he nodded and backed up a pace. Is it important? he asked silently. Yes. Verdigris is busy, and Luna’s sleeping. Come see me immediately. Contact faded, and Ivan finished his beer. “She wants you?” “Yes, and I can’t imagine why. She was very angry last night.” “As said before, Princesses are forgiving. Even Verdigris forgives. Somewhat.” Nikolai chuckled evilly. “If see him, say I like his style, Ivan. Maybe not born Rus, but understands how to play.” Stallkhovich smiled in spite of himself. “I’m supposed to stay away from him, but I will if I see him. I have to go.” “Then go. Will tell Sasha you stopped by.” He looked thoughtful. “Come to dinner, Ivan. Have not seen you in too long. Be good for you, да?” “If I can. That’s a promise, uncle Nikolai. до свидания.” (((()))) Celestia sat at her desk, working on various legal forms, ranging from taxes to criminal reforms. She was using it as a distraction and knew it, but didn't care. Her thoughts turned to Ivan, and she admitted to herself although she was still mad, she was also worried about him. What's happening to you, Ivan? she asked herself. She heard a knock on her door. “Enter.” Ivan entered her office as bidden and stood before her. “You wanted to see me, Highness?” he asked. “Yes,” Celestia replied. “This is about what happened at dinner.” “It is.” Ivan looked at her and knew what she was asking. “I … I – ” “Level with me, Ivan. It’s about your parents, isn't it?” Celestia said. Stallkhovich looked down and turned his ears back in anger and shame. “Yes,” he said almost inaudibly. “Among other things.” “I overheard your conversation with Nikolai, and I have to say something.” Celestia looked at him steadily as he gawked at her. "Ivan, I suspect your parents' death has been eating at you over the years. You've snapped like this before, and I've always chalked it up to job stress, but now I’m not so sure.” She produced a card. “Verdigris has been a good friend, and there was no reason for you to snap at him." “Yes, he has.” “That's why I want you see Princess Cadance. She is a licensed Counselor, and one of the best.” “But Commander – a Counselor? Isn't this a little sudden?” “Yes it is. You've ignored this problem for years, until it’s gotten beyond your ability to deal with in healthy ways. So I'm forcing the issue.” She looked at him steadily. “You haven’t left me much choice.” She gave him the card. "And Ivan.” She held his gaze. “It’s not a request.” "Yes, Commander.” As he turned to leave, he spoke. “Celestia?” Finally. “Yes, Ivan?” “I'm truly sorry.” “I know. Luna and Verdigris are forgiving and don't hold grudges, even though it doesn't seem like it,” she replied with a smile. “And I’d like to hear it from you, when you’re feeling up to it.” Ivan nodded. “Thank you,” he said before walking out. Celestia sighed and swept the paperwork into a drawer. It could wait. This couldn’t. (((()))) Verdigris and Slope walked away from the practice field, their heads held high and their eyes shining. Today had been a good day, and the work-out capped it nicely. “Verdi, what’s Stallkhovich doing here?” He looked to see Ivan walking away from the Palace, his step and posture telling of a purpose. “If Celestia called him, he has to answer. I’m not going to start any trouble, so don’t worry.” They stopped and watched as the stallion trotted out the gates. “Must have a mission of some kind.” Verdigris, we need to talk. He looked up to see the Day Princess on her balcony, watching them. Right now? He saw her nod. Right away. You might want to step back. She smiled and walked inside. “Gotta go. Celestia’s calling,” he told Slope. “Aw, I was hoping to celebrate,” Slope complained as Marl and Blackrock passed them. “Hey, you two. You heard the mare.” They stopped and looked at each other, then grinned. “No shenanigans. She’s Stallkhovich’s cousin, and I won’t be very happy if you get her in trouble.” He caught and held their eyes. “Got it?” “Sure, Boss. We’ll just show her around, and warn her about Cloud Kicker,” Marl replied. “Warn? I met Cloud a few years ago, and she was all right.” What’s going on? ‘Rock grinned. “You might want to let us tell you. You’ve been a little out of the loop.” Verdigris nodded dubiously. “Okay. Have fun, but not too much. Gotta go.” He trotted away, spread his wings and launched. He flew up, noticing how light his armor really was, and silently thanked Celestia. He landed on the balcony and stepped inside to find his god-mother sitting at her desk, staring at the wall. “What’s happening?” “I think we over-reacted, but what’s done is done,” she replied softly. “I over-heard a conversation between Ivan and his uncle, and there’s more we didn’t know.” She fixed her eyes on him and continued, “I want you to look into the death of Captain Fire Flash near the Griffin borders. I didn’t know her; she was in the Stalliongrad Garrison. Ask Shining – no, he wouldn’t know. Talk to Surestrike. He would.” “Oh, I think I know what it’s about. She was his C.O.” Verdigris shook his head. “What if I don’t find anything here? I might have to go to Stalliongrad.” Celestia smiled. “Your armor’s enchantment works the same way as the others’. I don’t miss a trick if I have something in the pot.” “I’m never playing poker with you again,” he replied, blushing slightly. He chuckled, then sobered quickly. “What about Ivan? I still think he’s off on his assessment of the Griffins. If they had anything dangerous, they’d have used it before now. They just don’t seem to have the patience. The Archives were clear on that.” “Maybe. I’ll have some of the ‘Light Brigade’ do a reconnaissance probe to make sure. The last thing I want is to be wrong when Ivan was right. He won’t say ‘I told you so’, but...” she trailed off significantly. “No, no reason to do that to him,” Verdigris agreed. “Okay, is that all? You’ve got me wondering, and I want to get started.” “Nothing else. Oh, how’s Slope adjusting?” “Like she was born a Guard,” he replied with a smile. “I guess I did good.” Celestia nodded and smiled. “Go on. You, Luna and I will need to talk after dinner tonight. I think we have to re-assess our reactions.” Verdigris’ smile vanished. “Yeah, we went too far. Being pissed is no excuse for that, and Luna’s behavior was partly my fault. I can promise he’ll get his hearing, depending on what the SpecOps colts find. I’ll just get going.” He paused for a goodbye nuzzle and let himself out. Celestia sighed, got up and walked to her balcony, looking out over Canterlot. If I misjudged you, I’m sorry, and I’ll make it right, Ivan. That’s a promise. (((()))) Ivan sighed as he looked at card's address. When he arrived, he was blown away by the mansion and its surrounding decor. He saw ponies tending the well-manicured shrubs and grass, as well as the statuary dotting the grounds. All in all, it created a sense of serenity surrounding the manse. “Heh. Perks of a Princess, I suppose.” He approached the mansion's front door – which appeared very expensive, to say the least – and knocked very gently. I'd swear if I knock any harder that door will crumble. He chuckled to himself. The door opened a bit at his knock, and one of the most beautiful mares he’d ever seen gazed at him through the gap; surprisingly, she was an Alicorn. The mare opened the door all the way and said with a smile, "You must be Ivan. I'm Cadance. Please come in." “Thank you, your Highness,” he said formally as he entered the mansion's foyer. “Please, just Cadance,” she insisted gently. “All right, Cadance.” Everything was nice, clean and quiet until he heard something fall and break. He turned to see a white-coated, red-maned mare staring down at a broken plate with guilty expression on her face. “I'm sorry, Cadance. I – I – ” she sobbed. “Its all right, Peppermint. Accidents happen. Just clean it up and blow it off,” Cadance said. Ivan was somewhat taken back by her casual attitude. She saw this and laughed softly. “Expecting me to jump down her throat the way Celestia, Luna and this Verdigris did with you?” “You know about that?” he said, wincing. “Yes. Celestia told me everything, which is why you’re here. Follow me, please.” Cadance led the way from the foyer to a private room where two cushions waited. “Please sit,” she said as she closed the door. Ivan obeyed and made himself comfortable as she took the other cushion. “Let's start with your childhood, okay?” He groaned inwardly. “Why there?” “Because most serious and some life-threatening problems begin there,” she said. Her eyes became very penetrating. “Do not lie to me, Ivan. Trust me, I'll know.” He nodded, then sighed and thought back to his childhood. “Ravenna was always the favored one,” he began. "Me? I didn't exist in my parents’ eyes. My birthday was never celebrated; my sister's was, and I was always made to pick up after everypony when the celebrations ended. I never got any gifts from them – well I got one. It was a rake and my father told me to use it to gather up the leaves outside the house and bag them. My parents took my sister everywhere, but I was always left at home, even on Hearth's Warming." “So you were ignored and taken advantage of,” Cadance said. “Yes, and my when parents did address me, they only screamed or called me ‘thing, minion or slave’,” Ivan said. His anger rose until it threatened to choke him, and he brutally fought it down. Cadance nodded and said, “But that's not all, is it?” “No, it’s not.” He had a flash of insight, and thought, Oh, Celestia, no. Please don’t ask. I don’t want to think about this. “Did your parents beat you, Ivan?” He cringed internally; all that showed was a flicker in his eyes. “Yes, but they never touched Ravenna, and never beat me in front of her. They showed her nothing but love, but not me. You see, I was an unplanned foal, so my ‘crime’ was being born. One day when I was ten years old my father called me by my name. You can imagine my surprise. I came downstairs and next thing I knew he literally threw me from the house and told me to never come back. The Stallkhovich household was a living hell, so I was actually relieved,” he said in a slow, precise monotone. “How do you feel about your parents' death, Ivan?” Cadance asked. “Part of me is sad, because I’ll never have the chance to ask why they treated me this way; part of me wants them to burn in Tarterus for the same reason,” he said, finally showing some emotion. Cadance nodded. “That’s understandable, Ivan. You said you were relieved when your father kicked you out of the house?” Celestia was right to send him to me. I'm sure she doesn’t know this part, so I’ll tell her when I give her my full report, she thought to herself. “Yes,” Ivan replied with a snort. “He actually did me a favor, in a way.” “Explain, please.” He sighed as if a great weight had been removed. “After my father threw me from the house, I bucked in the front door and ran as fast and far as I could. I had relatives in Canterlot – an uncle and aunt – and went there. They took me in, no questions asked, and I think for the first time in my life, I actually felt wanted and loved.” Cadance nodded. “But the damage was done,” she said. “Yes. It was,” he replied in a tone so bitter it was like eating unprocessed cacao beans. Cadance sighed to herself. “Ravenna never knew what happened, I take it.” “No. Apparently, my parents told her I’d run away; the ungrateful wretch.” He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. “We didn’t meet again until after the train wreck. I’d been assigned to secure the area, and she’d come to identify the remains. It … wasn’t exactly a tearful reunion; it was more like meeting a stranger, but we knew each other’s cutie marks.” “May I ask what they are?” “Mine’s two parallel silver spears pointing up and forward. Hers is a red longbow with two silver arrows nocked, pointing the same direction,” he replied with a thin smile. “She was very, very good with a longbow.” The smile disappeared. “And she got better after that day.” “What do you mean?” Cadance asked reluctantly. She could tell this was another piece of the puzzle; an important and nasty one. “We learned afterward the Vory had threatened the train company, and their safety would be guaranteed by a very large ‘donation’. They naturally refused, and our parents were aboard that train. Ravenna … didn’t take it well. The lovely little filly she once was vanished. She trained very hard to perfect her skills. Her professional name is one you might know: Archer.” Cadance nodded. It made sense. The younger, favored child would want revenge in the worst way. “And your relationship?” “It never existed, as far as I knew. I was just a colt staying with them; they never told her the truth,” he replied with a twisted smile that never touched his eyes. “I was not long out of the Academy as a Guard when we saw each other. It was all too much of a surprise, on top of the rest.” He sighed. “We never saw eye-to-eye on anything, and the circumstances made it worse. At best, it’s a tense stand-off.” Cadance nodded, and glanced at the clock. An hour had passed in what seemed like no time at all. “This is a good point to pause, Ivan. I don’t have any advice or instructions; I’ll need to process everything you’ve told me,” she said. “How are you feeling?” “It’s not easy re-living it, but I feel better. A huge weight’s off my shoulders,” he said, blinking back tears. “I haven’t thought about it much since I arrived in Canterlot; it was too painful. It still is, but I can see Celestia was right. This has been eating at me. I thought I could deal with it alone, but I wasn’t.” She put a hoof on his foreleg. “Nopony can do everything on their own, Ivan. Everypony needs help, and friends. Even Celestia and Luna.” “That – that’s hard to accept. They’ve seen and done so much.” “They’re still ponies like us, never mind the exterior. Inside we’re all the same,” she tapped a hoof over her heart. “We need love and friendship, and all that goes with them. You can die from lacking that; more accurately it can shorten your life, but you see what I mean.” She studied him for a few minutes. “I think you’ll be all right, but one session isn’t going to do everything.” She took a quill in her telekinesis and wrote a note. “I want to see you next week, at this time. I know it won’t be easy, but this will help you in ways you don’t know. Can you do this?” she asked as the note floated by his hoof. He accepted the note. “I can’t promise anything, but I will try. I … I haven’t felt this good in a long time.” Nikolai was right; I’m a worry-wart. That doesn’t change anything, but, well, I can’t stop now. I don’t think Celestia’s going to let me quit. “All right. I’ll see you in a week.” They stood and walked out to the foyer. “Ivan, I want you to keep a journal, someplace to put down your thoughts and feelings. It should help you identify and hopefully deal with them, at least what doesn’t need me. It helps a lot more than you’d think. If nothing else, you'll know what’s bothering you, and I want you to bring it with you. I’ll read it, and we can discuss what’s really troubling you.” “Yes, I can do that.” He bowed after stepping outside. “Thank you, Cadance. I’ll see you next week.” As he turned and walked away, Cadance stood there, watching him with professional calm. Only when he turned into the street did her expression change to show her sadness. “I hope we can get you through this, Ivan. Nopony deserves what you suffered,” she murmured. She wiped her eyes and closed the door. (((()))) Celestia waited for Luna and Verdigris, her expression sad. Oh, Ivan. It’s worse than I thought, and there’s still more to come. She shook her head. I don’t know how, but I’ll make it up to you. The door opened, and her god-son and sister walked inside. “Good evening.” “You’re being formal; that doesn’t sound good,” Verdigris said as the pair joined her at the table. “How bad?” he asked gently as Celestia poured tea. “Ivan’s home life wasn’t a good one. In fact, it was more like slavery.” Celestia took a breath and told them what Cadance had reported an hour ago. Their eyes widened in shock; Verdigris closed his eyes and grimaced, muttering to himself in Zebrican. When did he have time to learn it? she wondered. “What he told Cadance meshes a little too well with what he told you, god-son.” “Damn it. Well, I wish I could tell you I had the rest, but it’s not here; all we’ve got is a thin brief and a casualty report. I’ll have to go to Stalliongrad, and I’m not looking forward to that.” “Oh, Celly, prithee say ‘tis not true,” Luna said in a small voice, her eyes glinting with unshed tears. “I’m afraid I can’t. You know how empathic Cadance is.” The younger Princess looked down and sniffled. “Faust, what foals we be,” she lamented. “No more than I,” Celestia said. “I still think he’s over-reacting, and I’m positive Fire Flash is the key.” She paused in thought, then winced. “Well, it wouldn’t be the first time somepony fell in love with their Commanding Officer.” “Any since Night Fire?” Verdigris asked. He wasn’t teasing, from his expression. “Not that I was aware of.” Celestia looked out the Prench doors wistfully. “I miss some; others I could have done without. Creepy.” “Recall what I said some weeks ago, Celly?” When her sister nodded, Luna continued, “‘Tis a tragedy and heart-ache biding its time. I would not wish that upon anypony.” “Oh, yes, something we wanted to show you,” Celestia said after looking out into the night. She walked to a cabinet, opened it and brought out a frosted glass globe about a foot in diameter. Luna ran to and leaped from the balcony, returning a short time later with a one-foot cube of similar material. “What do you think?” Verdigris looked them over critically for a few minutes. His horn glowed as he examined them magically. “They store sunlight in the day and release it at night?” Celestia nodded. “Nice. Ponies can go out at night, and there’s no fuel costs. How large an area do they light up?” “About fifty to an hundred feet across, depending on height,” Luna answered. “Mine have electrical supplements for rainy days.” He resumed studying the devices, then smiled. “I think you’ve got something here.” The smile faded. “What prompted you?” Celestia explained the conversation they’d had the first week he’d been gone, leaving out the pie discussion; Luna smirked, but remained silent. When she finished, Verdigris nodded. “I can see that, and you’re right. I suppose my business connections could help, if only to point you in the right direction. I’ll make a few inquiries.” He looked outside. “Canterlot could use some night life. The place sometimes resembles a ghost town.” “Thank you. At least there’s some good news for today.” Verdigris nodded, then said, “Y’know, something just occurred to me. I don’t remember seeing Ravenna’s cutie mark. I don’t remember if she had it covered, either.” “Magic is not restricted to Unicorns and Alicorns, nor only the Type specialities,” Luna replied after some thought. “Some can do unusual things, and thou said she was a Hawk. Mayhap her lineage is as mixed as thine. ‘Twould explain much.” “Ivan didn’t mention that, either. Something else you’ll have to check in Stalliongrad,” Celestia added. “Faust, I hate that place, but I’ll look into it.” Celestia gave him a gentle but pert smile. “Not swearing by me?” “You’re here. It’s kinda not right,” Verdigris said with a shrug. “Aye, ‘twould be uncomfortable,” Luna agreed. “Is there aught else, Celly?” “No, I think that’s everything.” Celestia sighed. “He’s had it worse than you have, Verdigris. You knew your parents wanted you. I can’t imagine anything else.” “Neither can I.” Verdigris looked outside. “How can ponies be that way?” He thought a moment. “Maybe it’s Stalliongrad. The place is a total mess, god-mother.” “That may be true, but how to fix it,” Celestia agreed. “One may hope ‘twill resolve itself,” Luna said as she wiped her eyes. “May I watch him, Celly? Mayhap I can learn from his dreams.” “All right, but be careful, Lulu.” The Solar Diarch looked at her god-son. “I want you on your way at first light. I can’t stand to have my ponies hurting when I can do something about it.” “No need to tell me twice. That’s just not right.” “Then we’re adjourned. We messed this up, so we’ll fix it.”