An Eque$trian Payday

by The card holder


A Twilight Interlude

Twilight Sparkle kept going over the newspaper clippings, looking for clues as to the identity and motive of the now-infamous gang. Being Princess Celestia's personal student, there was no trouble in getting copies of newspapers that ran back on Earth, as well as what little security footage they had of the crew, which she was also viewing on her computer.

Unfortunately for her, so far she had yet to find anything telling her about their motive. So instead, she decided to go over all of their heists as a whole, to try and find a common trait between them. The first one was supposed to be obvious: money. But with the most recent incident and the Ponyville Hospital, as well as a few other heists back on Earth, it was proven that either money wasn't everything for them, or they also acted as some kind of mercenary group, stealing things for the highest bidder. Both of those things complicated the entire issue, making it a wild goose chase to find where they'll strike next.

Sighing in frustration, Twilight went to the kitchen, to get herself a glass of water. However, when she held the glass under the faucet and turned it on, nothing happened, apart from some noises that a sink should probably never make.

"When are those plumbers going to get here," she muttered angrily to herself. Hearing a knock on the door, Twilight's anger faded. Looks like they were finally here.

Since Kevin was out doing something right now with Spike (probably doing something men liked to do together, like sports), Twilight had the entire tree to herself. She went over to the door and opened it, seeing four men in work uniforms waiting.

"Bodhi's Plumbing," one of them says, clean-shaven and with a short head of hair. There was a slight accent to his words, but she paid it no mind.

"Excellent, right this way." The men followed her inside to the kitchen, where she pointed to the sink. "I honestly know nothing about plumbing, so..." She coughed. "Well, the sink is broken, so... fix it, please, I guess?"

"Don't worry, ma'am," one of them said, this one's face adorned with a mustache. "We'll handle it."

Satisfied, Twilight went back to her computer desk, to start going over the crew's heists again. There was an incident at a bank, where they stole a hefty amount of money, and it also seemed to be their first major recorded crime. Then there was an incident where the men went on, as the newspaper described, "a postal rampage through the streets, gunning down cops in order to achieve some unknown goal." However, after looking at both pictures and police reports from the incident, Twilight could tell that the reason they did so was more than likely because someone in their operation betrayed them, and they saw fit to deal with him. If nothing else, that was something: when betrayed, the crew will stop at nothing to take revenge.

Other reported heists picked up her interest. One of them involved a local meth lab being robbed of millions in cash by the men. Criminals stealing from criminals, a kind of poetic justice. What was most interesting about it was that the money wasn't carried out- at least, not by the men. Instead, it was reportedly air-lifted out by a helicopter pilot under their payroll. When these guys wanted something, they got it, one way or another.

There was also a robbery of a wealthy jewelry business, but there was little to no evidence linking the crew with the crime, although several witnesses described seeing four masked men escaping via helicopter once the alarm went up.

The next one featured a good amount of gold being stolen from a mercenary group, which was soon lost among the crates in a shipping yard. A lot of co-ordination was shown on the part of the crew, with multiple other accomplices being reported.

Another one had the crew taking a prisoner from a prison transport, before making them almost vanish into thin air, though it's suspected a "sky hook" was involved.

Of particular note was another heist at a hospital, though this one was special in that the men seemed to be after a certain patient's blood, which contained a very potent virus that, according to various experts, could very well cause an apocalypse scenario if left unchecked. The military was actually called in for this one, resorting to bombing the building in a desperate bid to take down the assailants. They got away, but the man they sold the blood to was soon found and arrested, preventing a global crisis.

Yet another report had them holding a government official hostage as they grilled him for passwords to a server holding over twenty-five million in tax dollars. Police were actually trying to detain the official when the crew got involved, leading to a swift response.

One of the more odd heists was one in a state called "Florida", where apparently two men were running a counterfeit operation. The gang went to great lengths to pull this one off, even going as far as to make a fake business weeks in advance-

"Ma'am, we're finished," a voice said from behind. Turning, Twilight saw the four men heading to the door, the mustached one being the one who spoke to her.

"Oh, alright, thanks." She pulled out a bag of bits. "How much will this be?"

"Twenty bits."

Taking out the appropriate amount, she levitated it to the man, who accepted and put it in his pockets. He gives a quick wave goodbye before heading outside with the other three.

Going back to her studies, Twilight's brow furrowed. All of the group's heists had a few things in common: perfect teamwork, multiple occasions of both well-thought-out plans as well as equally-well-thought-out backup plans, and body counts that could go into the hundreds, nearly all of which are police. Civilian deaths rarely occur, almost as if they know that the cops will hold off in a hostage situation. All of these facts didn't help her at all.

Hitting her head on the desk in frustration, Twilight wondered just where these dangerous criminals could be, and where they would strike next...