//------------------------------// // Parousia Chapter 7- Catharsis // Story: Nature's Call // by Doc Crowl //------------------------------// The way back to the cave was beautiful in the newly risen sun, with vibrant colors anywhere I turned. Birds sang, there was a cooling breeze, and it was all-around picturesque. Unfortunately, I couldn't enjoy any of that. I was too busy fretting about precisely what Pinkie Pie- and by extension Fluttershy and Twilight-had been listening to. "Slipknot, System of a Down, Avenged Sevenfold, Metallica, Godsmack, even Linkin freakin' Park!" I fumed, running my hands through my hair. "I don't want ANY of that stuff coming into Equestria!" "Why not?" Deluge asked, breaking her silence for the first time in hours. I looked up in surprise; honestly, I'd kind of forgotten she was there. She raised a single eyebrow while carrying an exhausted Ruckus on one shoulder. "It's, um... They're not... That is, they kinda... Aw, to hell with it!" I drew in a breath, organized my thoughts, and started again. "The bands are all great, and if I didn't like them, they wouldn't be on there. But, and this is a major but, most of the songs are about situations and emotions that'd be foreign, out of place, in Equestria. They're mostly just too... angry." "You're a major butt," Ruckus mumbled through his sleepy lips. Deluge rolled her eyes and ordered him back to sleep. He immediately obliged, turning his head and nuzzling into her neck before sighing his way back into dreamland. "How can he wake himself up just to make a snide comment?" I asked. "'Cuz that'd be a pretty cool talent to develop!" "We look forward to time away from you when we can get it," she groaned. "Why would you take that away from us?" I huffed indignantly. Like they could even function without my overbearing presence! "Well, excuse me, Ms. High Horse. Why don't you step down off your towering steed and join us little people with our pitiful problems, then?" If her eyes rolled any more, they might just start spinning uncontrollably in their sockets. Which I wouldn't mind seeing. "It's not important," she downplayed. "You're not angry or mean, even if you do start getting annoying pretty fast. You've got nothing to worry about." I shook my head vehemently. "No, you don't understand," I told her. "I'm not angry or mean because I make the conscious decision not to be. And when I can't help it, when I feel like in going to explode from being so angry about something, then I lock myself in a room and listen to that kind of stuff as a way to vent. Then, even if I'm happy, I can listen to that angry music and associate it with a sort of... Cleansing of my emotions, I guess you could say. And I'm happy. "On the other hand- or hoof, as you natives like to say- Equestria hasn't got those feelings. There's no reason to listen to that music, no positive emotions associated with them. If anything, they'll just introduce it to the ponies or even Diamond Dogs." I looked at her hard, making sure I had her attention when I continued. "There are songs about death, loneliness, pure anger at the world, suicide, loss, drugs, separation, loss of faith, even utter self-hatred." I shrugged. "Granted, that doesn't make up a majority of the music. Most of it is just silly, or happy, or something to rock out to. Honestly, I wouldn't mind a little Stevie Ray Vaughn, Nat King Cole or Harry Connick Jr. making their way here. But… Christ! Just look at any of the songs by Staind! No pony would understand that!" Deluge considered my tirade for a moment before picking out my one slipup. "What is 'Christ'?" she asked. The sound of my palm smacking against my face in horror came resounding off the rocks that formed the tunnel entrance crystal clear. "You're just trying to kill me, aren't you?" I gasped. "You want me to have a stress-related aneurism so you can have Benjamin. That's what this is." "Quit being an immature puppy and just explain," she snapped back. "While I'm sure the two-excuse me, three of you- are having a super stimulating conversation, we need to get our flanks to the Great Cavern NOW if we're going to be a part of the meeting!" Lyra fumed, trotting out of the dark tunnel entrance and (thankfully) stopping Deluge's Christ related questions. It's not that I didn't believe in the guy; I just couldn't even begin to imagine what the Crusades would be like here! Better to just help the ponies out and get back home, changing as little as possible. Introducing one of Earth's largest religions and conflicting with their entire way of life doesn’t exactly fit into the ‘little change’ category. "So, it's actually called the 'Great Cavern'?" I pondered out loud. "That's certainly... uh... original. But shouldn't you be in bed?" Lyra turned and started trotting down the tunnel, forcing Deluge and I to jog after her if we wanted to keep up the conversation. "Princess Twilight woke up, we got word of some major movement in Ponyville, and every pony is getting antsy. There's no time for sleep!" she replied over her shoulder. I got excited, picking up my speed a little when I heard that Twilight had woken up. Hopefully, we could actually come up with a plan now, and I could apologize for almost killing her! "Paul, you've been happy every time I've seen you," Deluge started thinking aloud. "Not even the Nuckelavee have made you as angry as some ponies. What would make you so mad back on your world?" "Not the time, Deluge," I told her. "We kinda need to focus on Twilight, okay? And remember, call me Creed, if only for simplicity’s sake." She continued jogging for a few seconds, Ruckus bouncing on her shoulder without a care as he slept. "You told me stories about everyone in your family, and even your friends... Why don't you tell me one real quick about your mother?" I immediately started jogging faster than the others, outpacing them and widening the gap with each stride. I think my blood pressure jumped quite a few points, unrelated to the early morning run. Thankfully, neither of them called me back. I lost the two Equestrians fairly quickly in the tunnel, but I knew from my walk out that I still had a few minutes at this pace before I got back into the 'Great Cavern' or whatever, so I fished my iPod out of my pocket and plugged my earbuds in. Strangely, I saw that it still had quite a bit of power, but I decided to just accept my lucky break and make the most of it. I started blasting Staind's "Waste", my go-to song when something was stressing me out. As the track finished and I started to see some light at the end of the tunnel, I felt much better. Ready to be the chipper, wise-ass human everyone (myself included) needed. I yanked the buds out and shoved them in my pocket, entering the now brightly lit cave full of Diamond Dogs. They gave me done dirty looks as I passed by, some of them grabbing their children close, but I didn't care. One of the few friends I had in this world was awake, and I'd be damned if I let a few Debbie Downers get in my way! As I took the steps up to the second level three at a time, I saw that most of the bunks were empty. Their occupants were crowded around Twilight's room, and there was a healthy chatter going. Obviously, Twilight would be in the middle of that congregation. Who wouldn't want to say hello to the long lost Princess of the kingdom? At first I tried scooting through the crowd politely, asking the ponies and Diamond Dogs to pardon my rude advances. You know, all gentleman-like. Unfortunately for them, they were packed to tightly together, and simply refused to lose their spot in what they called a "line". So, I decided to take a page from my friend Andre the Giant's book, and cupped my hands together. "EVERYBODY MOVE!" I boomed, standing as tall and menacingly as I could in the tightly packed crowd. They immediately got the message, and I happily made my way to the front as the wall of flesh parted before me. When I reached the doorway, I turned back to them, and said as sweetly as I could, "Thank you all! Have a nice day!" Then I slammed the door in their faces. Screw 'em. I looked over my shoulder, and saw that Twilight was still in bed. There was Bon Bon next to her, spoon-feeding Twilight what looked like some sort of soup, with a concerned look on her face. She glanced up at me once, apparently didn't feel like there was a need to worry, and went back to feeding Twilight one spoonful at a time. I recognized a motherly tenderness unknown to me, but immediately put such bitter thoughts out of my mind. "Geez, Deluge really knows how to screw with my head... Just ignore it, and focus on your friend's wellbeing," I ordered myself. "You can listen to more music later and get it out of your system entirely." I walked forward with some trepidation, afraid in the back of my mind that she might reject me or maybe be broken if I made too much noise. Not very logical, but something you always feel when walking into a sick friend's room. "Hey there Twilight, ol' buddy, ol' pal, ol' friend of mine!" I started lightly. "How's it hanging?" She lifted her head briefly to look at me, and smiled. "Hey Paul," she said weakly, laying her head back onto her pillow. "You're not in magic sucking more right now, are you?" Bon Bon's head shot up to glare at me suspiciously. "Don't worry, I know enough not to walk into your room without getting rid of that," I lied, quickly focusing to do just that as I dropped my stuff next to the door. Immediately, the crystals that little room brightened. Twilight chuckled quietly. "Sure, whatever you say. How are you feeling now, Paul? Have you recovered?" "Don't worry about me, I'm fine," I told her. "I'm more concerned with you. They, uh.. They told me I might have come close to sucking you dry when you tried to fix my broken mind. So, really, I have much more reason to be concerned about your wellbeing than my own." She shook her head when Bon Bon offered the next spoonful, took a breath, and then sat up slowly in bed. I went to lend a helping hand, but she waved me off with a focused look on her face. I sat on the edge of her bed, and when she finally managed to sit up completely, she gave me an incredibly warm and genuine smile. "You can't love others unless you love yourself first," she said simply, her smile never wavering. "Did our show teach you that about friendship, or did its human producers leave that one out?" "Not mentioned to my knowledge," I laughed. "Probably because it's bull," I added within my head. I didn't say it out loud, considering it would probably cause her to pity me or something like that. I'd hated myself for as long as I could remember- trust me when I say I could love others more than I could love myself, and that's all that mattered. I didn’t need pity, or to give her cause to be concerned over anything but her own health. “But seriously, how do you feel?” I asked, immediately moving closer to inspect her. “Are you hurt physically? Do you feel ‘bone-weary’? Or are you just tired?” I started poking and prodding her, dreading to find some sort of break that I would have indirectly caused. She knocked my hands away, snorting. “I’m fine, just exhausted,” she told me. “Nothing to be alarmed about. In fact, I’d have expected much more damage going up against that Nuckelavee one-on-one, but really, I wasn’t-” I exploded. “You WHAT?!?” I screeched. “Twilight, what were you thinking?! You could have died! He’s one of the nine individuals responsible for the fall of Equestria in a matter of days, remember? Why would you do that!” “Because my friend needed me,” she said sourly. “A simple ‘thank you’ would have sufficed, you know! And I managed to drive him from Equestria in the end, anyway!” I took a deep breath, and exhaled with my eyes closed. “Aaand, calm. Phew. Okay. Twilight, thank you so so much. I can’t even begin to describe my gratitude,” I said sincerely. “But you have to understand where I’m coming from. I knew you ponies put yourselves in a lot of danger when you came to rescue me, but I kind of expected you to just distract him or something. I didn’t know you actually… How the Hell did you manage to drive him from Equestria all by yourself?” She smiled widely, obviously proud of herself. “Well,” she began, “he definitely put up a good fight. With you practically a zombie, I knew I had to do something, or we’d never be able to get back. So as Lyra carried you off, I squared up with him and-” Twilight was cut off for the second time that day as Lyra and Deluge busted in, sans Ruckus. Both looked incredibly relieved, but had to turn their attention to the crowd that started to push in behind them, seeing that Twilight was sitting up in bed. After a brief struggle, they managed to shut the door again, and Lyra turned back with a smug smile that I was coming to associate with her. “Speak of the Devil,” I deadpanned, but couldn’t keep a straight face as her smile dropped into a scowl immediately. “Shut it, monkey,” she snarled good-naturedly. “I took you down once, I can do it again!” “Not if I’m ready!” I shot back. Luckily, I ducked just in time for the small pebble she whipped at my head. “Told you,” I giggled as I sat back up. “Just wait, you’ll get yours,” she said semi-seriously. “Now then, how are you, Princess?” Twilight rolled her eyes. “Lyra, I told you, just call me Twilight! We’ve known each other for years!” Lyra smiled bashfully. “Yeah, I know, but you’re a Princess now. And an important leader in our rebellion, if that’s what you would call it. Better to be able to idolize you, right?” “I’ll say!” I put in. “She took out a Nuckelavee all by herself! You know, those fellas that laid waste to Equestria without breaking a sweat? The evil trans-dimensional beings from Earth that were a figure of myth up until now? The ones who defeated everything Equestria could muster military-wise, including the Princesses and their top warriors? Yeah, those baddies.” I looked at Twilight pointedly. “Which leads me to the next point: Rainbow Dash, Flotilla, and Armada were all in the Detention Hall when I was there. We need to get them out, especially if we plan on liberating the rest of Equestria. Since, you know, none of us are exactly military strategists.” I paused a few moments, choosing my next words carefully, before adding quietly, “And no one, especially not Rainbow Dash, deserves to be stuck there.” I couldn’t help but feel a bit of despair course through me, and I averted my gaze from theirs. The others were quiet before Lyra patted my knee, and I looked into her golden eyes. “We know it was difficult for you,” she said in a heartfelt tone. “I can’t even begin to understand what you went through, and I’m sorry you had to go through that. But you’re right. We need to focus on getting the others out. You, of all of us here, know that best.” I heard Deluge snort sarcastically, and felt Twilight tense through the bedsprings. As I looked into Lyra’s eyes, though, I couldn’t find one shred of deception. All I could see through the rings of shining gold were a deep-seeded pain and an earnestness that came from her soul. Her gaze never wavered, though she must have heard Deluge’s snort. Instead, she searched my own eyes. For what, though? Acceptance? Agreement? I couldn’t tell. As I sat there wondering, our eyes locked and nopony saying a word, I saw her grow more and more tense. More… I don’t know, desperate. And I couldn’t stand to see her like that; soul laid bare, pleading with her eyes. No matter what she had done, no matter what her intentions had been, I just… I couldn’t bring myself to reject her. I nodded solemnly, and then stood up. She smiled at me, real joy written all over her face, and I couldn’t help but to smile back. “Let’s get to it,” I sighed, turning to Twilight. “Any ideas, great leader?” Twilight relaxed visibly, but shook her head. “I’ve only been awake for about half an hour. I haven’t really had time to come up with anything.” I looked at Lyra and Deluge, both of who had contemplative looks on their faces. “Maybe, we could attack Ponyville? Digging from underneath them?” Deluge offered hopefully. I shook my head. “I don’t like it,” I told her flat-out. “There’s no way I’d allow you to start attacking each other. Someone, or somepony, would get hurt. Besides, the other Diamond Dogs have no more reason to fight than your group does, and look how quickly you guys switched sides. That’s out the window.” Lyra disagreed. “There’s nothing we can do to avoid conflict,” she put in morosely. “I’ve been thinking about it since this whole thing started. The Diamond Dogs guarding Ponyville are too scared for their families, and wouldn’t want to risk their safety. They’ll fight to the last. Then, after the Diamond Dogs, you’ve still got the Nuckelavee in the Detention Hall to deal with.” “No, you’re wrong,” I replied forcefully. “There’s absolutely no need for any one of you to get involved. If, say, Deluge and I were to dig in under the Detention Hall, I could confront Nahor and-” “And what would stop the Diamond Dogs from coming to his rescue?” she shot back. “What would stop them from tearing you apart? Even if you were going to take Nahor head-on, you need something to be going on in the meantime to provide you cover.” “That won’t work; there’s too much of a chance of someone getting hurt!” “News Flash, alien- Equestria isn’t the perfect land you make it out to be! There’s been war, there’s always been death, and there’s always been a struggle for freedom!” “Don’t give me that, your kind hasn’t seen war or any real struggle for ‘freedom’ since Nightmare Moon! And how long before that was it? Three generations? Four? Face it, none of you are prepared for this kind of fight!” “So what? When everything’s on the line, anypony would fight for the freedom of themselves and their loved ones! It’s not going to be an issue of moral!” “I think that-” Deluge started in. “Not now!” Lyra and I simultaneously reprimanded her before whipping back toward each other. “And what happens when one of you gets hurt? What happens when one of you die?!” I yelled, pointing at her. “What do you think your ponies are going to do then?” “Fight harder! Because that’s what we ponies do: we fight for what we know is right, whether or not it’s going to be a tough fight!” she shot right back. “Don’t impose your visions of a utopian society on us. We’re not one! And on a related note, stop pushing your own insecurities on us! Just because your mommy didn’t love you, it doesn’t give you the right to dictate what we can and can’t do for our world’s safety!” I think my eyes just about bulged out right then, and my hands started clenching of their own volition. I knew that feeling; it was one I had to deal with on a daily basis after my father died. It meant there had better be some sort of outlet now, or things were going to quickly spiral out of control. “You… You’re just so… infuriating!” I yelled at her. “You try to comfort me one second, then you’re screaming at me the next! You know what? FINE! Kill yourselves! What does it matter?! You’re all just a bunch of cartoons anyway!” With that, I stormed out of the room. Door in the way? Not anymore- that thing about cracked the stone wall it smacked open against. Crush of a few dozen bodies pressed as tightly against the doorway as they could in the hopes of getting a look at their Princess? Not for long- there were ponies and Diamond Dogs who were flying in every direction possible. Thankfully, I had the presence of mind to throw them only into their friends. Much softer targets than the stone walls behind me, and much less chance of them getting hurt. I looked around, deciding which way I was going to go. The Great Cavernous Cave of damn Diamond Dogs or whateverthehell was suddenly much too enclosed than I cared for, and I made up my mind to just get out. I strode away from Twilight’s doorway, and dropped off the side of the level instead of taking the stairs to save time. I landed with a heavy THUD, my shoes imprinting deeply into the cool dirt, and scaring the crap out of a small Diamond Dog who was trying to get in a midday nap. I continued my powerful strides toward the exit, ignoring anything in my way. Later, I felt bad about wrecking some of the cots, but at the time I couldn’t care less. For their own safety, I figured they could sacrifice some bedding. I made it to the exit, and glanced back briefly over my shoulder. There was a path carved through the cots to where I stood, and right above where that path started, stood Lyra. I couldn’t tell why she was standing with her legs braced, but I didn’t care. The mere sight of her once again stirred a mix of emotions, and I turned back into the darkness of the tunnel to leave. I paced my way purposefully up the tunnel, ignoring the offshoot to the left that supposedly lead to Ponyville. The same tunnel they would be leading a ragtag ‘army’ through to assault a fixed position, something even a layman knew would result in an Alamo-type situation with a being stronger than any of them. Just that thought nearly set me off again. I picked up my pace even harder, but didn’t sprint down the tunnel; for whatever reason, I’d found that the feeling of striding as long and hard as I could was more of a stress reliever than running could be. The tunnel, being underground, the stress of knowing I could help them if they justlistened to what I had to stay, it was all pressing down on me with a pressure I couldn’t escape. I started feeling claustrophobic, and my breath started coming in short bursts. My heart was racing, I was frustrated, and tears started to well up in my eyes for no good reason. It got to the point where I HAD to sprint, get out of the tunnel as fast as possible, get away from the Equestrians, and get somewhere I could clear my head. My veins all felt like they were about to burst from a pressure within, my head was going to explode from the constant pounding of my overacting heartbeat, and my legs were going to break if I forced them against the ground any faster or stronger than I was. I was hyperventilating, going lightheaded, about to pass out, with white splotches appearing in my vision. I had a feeling of dread, a fear that I was going to die, that something horrendously, inexplicably horrifying was going to happen, and I couldn’t do d damn thing about it. Then, I was suddenly free. I shot out of the tunnel into a clear and warm midday sun, with a rich blue blanketing the world above. The birds were chirping, and the trees swayed slightly with each breath of air tat whispered by. There was stillness, yet vitality, to Nature that I had come to pick up on, and it helped calm me now. I slowed to a trot, then a walk, and then finally, stopped. I was still hyperventilating, tears still threatened to flow, and my heart still beat a crazy tap-dance against my ribcage, but I there was no longer the feeling of dread that I’d had in the tunnel. I tried to take deep breaths to calm my vibrating body, and I started to come down from… whatever the hell it was that had just happened. I looked back, and was surprised to see that I was actually a good distance from the tunnel entrance. In fact, I couldn’t have been in the tunnel from more than a few minutes, tops. ”How fast was I going?” I asked myself, still breathing deeply. I shook myself, chalking it up to the weird way Equestria was affecting my body, and closed my eyes to actually contemplate what had just happened in critical, scientific detail. Just like talking through a patient in one of my workups for Med classes. ”Shortness of breath. Tears that seemed to come from nowhere. Claustrophobia, when I’ve never had trouble with small spaces before- in fact, they’d always been somewhat comforting to me. Heart racing. Blood pressure skyrocketing, as interpreted by the feeling that my veins were going to ‘pop’. Feeling of imminent dread, when there was nothing in the immediate vicinity that even came close to having the ability to hurt me.” What was it? I’d never heard of anything like that, no diseases or psychological issues that were like it. “So what was it?” I asked myself. “Describe how it felt, and pretend you’re treating a patient.” As I stood on the clearing, I crossed my arms and tried to give voice to exactly the emotions I had experienced. Aloud, I said, “Well, it was… terrifying. I felt like I was going to die. That there was something that was crushing in from every side, and my body was trying to explode outwards to escape it. Or….. Something similar. But that doesn’t really describe how you felt emotionally, does it? No, I guess not. Emotionally, I guess it was sort of like my body was speaking to me. It was saying ‘run, run, get out, get away from the evil thing or it’s going to get you.’ But what physiologically would cause that?” I sucked in my left cheek, chewing on it slightly while I mulled it over. “I suppose, that could be attributed to your fight or flight response,” I reminded myself weakly. “Yeah, but I’ve never been one to run away from something. Sure, I usually wouldn’t fight it either, but the whole ‘flight’ ting just isn’t me.” I nodded, trying to take the logic step by step. “Right. So, I’m acting against my status quo, reacting with a sort of panic to a situation where I should have just angrily walked away. Why would I do that?” My ears perked up. “Wait… panic… Reactions of a ‘fight or flight’ response, the feeling of doom, the tears, the increased heartbeat and blood pressure- that’s it! I had a panic attack!” It felt wonderful to have figured that mystery out, and I was pretty proud of myself. Plus, all those medical and psych classes were paying off on another world! “Yeah!” I yelled, pumping my fists in the air and doing a little shuffle like a boxer who was just getting warmed up. “So what if I talk to myself out loud?! It worked, I figured it out, and I’m not crazy!” There are studies saying people who talk to themselves tend to be smarter than those who don’t right? Right. As I smiled, again taking in the beauty of the area I found myself in, I finally remembered what I had just been running from. My arms slowly dropped to my sides and I sighed, before bringing them up to rub my eyes. “What are they thinking?” I groaned. “They can’t do this… Hell, I can’t do this either, but I’d at least have a better chance. Plus, even if I do go down, it’s not like they’ve lost someone who they’ve grown up with. I’ll just be a stranger, here the briefest of seconds, and then they can continue with their lives…” I trailed off, knowing I had to stop myself before I got all philosophical. My stomach growled, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten in at least a day. For a guy my size, that just wouldn’t do. I glanced around, remembering everything my father had taught me about hunting and surviving in the wilderness. “Well,” I mumbled, cracking my neck several ways. “I guess it’s long past the time that I put Dad’s teachings to some good use.” _________________________________________________________________________________________ When Deluge emerged from the tunnel entrance, Celestia’s beautiful sun had just dipped behind the horizon. Her Diamond Dogs eyes adjusted swiftly, thanks to years of evolution from working underground to reach their precious rocks. She sniffed the air cautiously, picking up faint whispers of fire-cooked meat. She knew enough of her own kind to assume that any kills would have been brought down for the good of the pack, and because there were no dragons for miles (well, except for Spike, but he didn’t really count), that left just one possible source. Her target, the human. She padded softly, following the winding trail of scents that lead her deeper into the forest. Over trees, around a few small streams, she finally found him camped out atop a small ridge, with several of the large trees in the area felled and set up around the campfire in a circle. He sat silently, rare for the ridiculously large and silly human, staring into the fire and chewing slowly on one of a few small animals that had been cooked. The others remained on the spit, roasting. Deluge considered him as he sat, staying out in the darkness as she stared. He was powerfully built, not unlike a few of the apes she had come across in her traveling years. He liked to make jokes about being overweight, but even with nothing to cross-reference him with, she knew he simply perceived himself that way. He was actually fairly hardened, softer emotionally than physically. It was only his mental lens that distorted his body into an ugly thing. His facial hair and clothing swayed slightly in the breeze, but he remained stoic. His ‘beard’ had grown several centimeters since she had first seen him, and he had complained the previous day that he had to see about two things in Equestria: a barber, and someplace to shower. He tossed the stick he had been holding into the fire, and the small flare up in the flames was enough to reflect off his deep amber eyes. Deluge thanked the Gods the fire threw off his night vision, so she could sit and watch him. Paul- she never really could think of him as ‘Creed’- was really the most suitable candidate for a father her darling Ruckus could have. He was intelligent, strong, thoughtful, funny, playful- she could continue the list forever. She knew he fought tooth and claw for his friends, even those he had just met, but she shivered to think what anyone would have to face if they threatened his family. Paul sighed, shaking his head, and moved forward to sit on the ground to lean back against the trunk of the medium sized tree. He looked into the sky, searching for something Deluge could only guess at. She had seen him do this a few times before; during the nights he couldn’t sleep back at the Ruins, he would find someplace elevated to lay on his back and stare at the sky. Sometimes he might talk to himself, but usually he just spoke to the ghost of his father. Asking forgiveness, asking advice, speaking about his emotions in his absence, that sort of talk. Deluge never interrupted it, feeling like she was sitting in on a sacred convening or privy to the secrets of an entirely different world. He laid his soul bare, and she could honestly say she loved him for it. Even if he didn’t, or couldn’t, return her emotions, being close friends or even just being there for him was good enough for her. Her ears immediately stood on point as he began talking to his father in that low, rumbling, carousing way of his. “She gets on my nerves like no one I’ve ever met,” he admitted slowly. “I know she’s the reason for me… losing myself, at the Detention Hall. But I can’t think of her that way. Every time I see her, I can’t help but notice the pain she’s got deep inside. The same kind of pain I’ve been telling you about for years.” It took her a moment, but Deluge realized he was talking about that green pony, Lyra Heartstrings. The one who had pushed for his mental collapse. Deluge’s hackles raised, and she let the barest hint of a growl escape. She might deal with the pony in order to save Equestria, but if it came time to decide between sacrificing Paul and losing Equestria, well… There were other worlds. “I know Deluge kids around with me, but I can tell she really has feelings. I’ve watched her, even when she doesn’t notice. But… talking with her the other night, while walking through the forest… It… it was almost like I had you back again.” He seemed to struggle with the last admission, even if it made Deluge’s heart sing. “I just… I can’t see her that way,” he continued. “I know, you’d be pushing me to go for it, like little Jenny Perkins in fourth grade.” He chuckled. “You remember that? She would make googly eyes for me to make me laugh, we’d come up with silly songs together… That is, until her family moved away when the gangs got too bad…” Deluge wasn’t sure she liked the comparison to a little girl from Paul’s childhood, but he spoke well enough of her that she couldn't complain. Maybe she could try those 'guglee eyes' later to cheer him up? "But that Lyra..." Paul continued, utterly unaware of Deluge's presence. "I don't know, she just seems like a kind of... Kindred spirit, maybe? Someone- er, somepony- that could relate to me? I can’t get too mad at her, because in a way, I know how she feels… I don't know, Dad, I just wish you were here to help me. You'd probably tell me 'independence is a part of growing up' or 'life is defined not by your mistakes, but how you handle them, so get out there and do something stupid!' like you used to. Even if that's all you'd say... At least I could thank you in person for the guidance." Paul lapsed into silence, letting the crackling of the flames fill the air with their own speech. Deluge recognized his usual pattern of ending his 'conversations', and started padding toward the ridge. Though she was loath to interrupt what she felt was a sacred and cathartic time for Paul, she had something to tell him. "If he caught me thinking words like 'cathartic', he'd never let me live it down," she thought to herself sarcastically. She climbed the ridge opposite the campfire from Paul, taking care to make enough noise that he would know someone was approaching. When she reached the top, she was surprised to see he hasn't moved a muscle. He remained stationary, a statue, except for his eyes. They constantly roamed the sky, taking in every infinitesimal speck of light that pierced the atmosphere miles above his head. "Pa-uh, Creed," Deluge caught herself before he could. "I need to talk to you. About the plans." He didn't respond at first, his eyes still searching the sky. Then, he said, "You know, where I come from, you can't see almost any stars at night. They're blocked by the light of the city. That's one reason I chose to attend college where I did. You can see the twinkling lights clearly no matter what." "That's nice Creed, but-" "I like being able to see the stars, because they remind me of when my father and I would sneak out of the house late at night with his telescope. Despite my mother's wishes, of course. You couldn’t see them all that well, but with the telescope, you could just make some out," he sighed contentedly. "He was so out of place in that ghetto of an area, my dad. He was a thinker, an entertainer, the most loving guy, and totally brilliant. If he got going on a subject he found fascinating or felt strongly about, he had this... excited way of talking about it that would suck you in until you couldn't help but to be left breathless in wonder." Deluge sighed. "Creed, I understand you love and miss your father. But really, what does he have to do with this situation we're facing? Here and now?" He shook his head. "You didn't let me finish. We would go out back, into our little dirt yard with the finder lock walls that would fall if you blew on them, and he would talk to me about his day, my day, what issues we were having, what we could do about it. I went out here always convinced I would get him to talk about his own parents, which he never did, and then would end up talking for hours about my own problems." He scoffed. "My problems. Heh. He was going through cancer, and I was talking about my stupid thirteen year old problems... Oh, but did he listen and give the greatest advice... Anyway, he said something that put a lot in perspective for me once. Something I've been thinking about long and hard these last few hours. He pointed up at the sky after the first few years of stargazing, when I was old enough to understand what he was talking about, and said, 'You know, most of the stars you see right now are dead and gone. Their light has just taken such a long time to get here that, to us, they still twinkle night after night.'" Paul sat up, staring intently into Deluge's eyes. His never wavered, and never looked away. They were intense, enveloping, like a flood of pent-up emotions that swept Deluge away in their turbulent embrace. And right then, Deluge understood exactly what Paul had meant about his father’s way of leaving someone breathless speaking about a deeply felt subject. "That's stuck with me for years. That everything you see is an illusion, that reality itself is based on your perception. That everyone and everything, deep down, is different than what they portray. The only constant in the world, the stars in the night sky themselves, are liars just like the rest of us." He took a deep breath, and then cocked his head. "So you asked me earlier why I don't talk about my mother... Here it is. Here's my supernova, my center, what none but those closest to me know. "She used to be a wonderful woman. Kind, compassionate, caring. But then my father died. The one I looked to the most, the one I idolized, was gone, and I needed someone there to take care of me. Instead, she became a goodfornothing drunk, couldn’t keep a job. Thankfully, my father had the forward thinking to put some money away so the mortgage would be paid off... But she fell into this zombie-like state of perpetual intoxication, coming out of it only when we ran out of money for her to keep going. Then she would sell our food stamps to get more, what you would use to buy food cheap if you couldn't afford even the barest minimum to keep yourself and your family alive. "My older sister left to stay with some friends, then got knocked up and moved out of state to live with her husband. She was the smart one. I was the stupid, idealistic one. I stayed to take care of my little brother, who was only three years younger when Dad died. "I was thirteen goddamnit, I was still a kid! Children aren't supposed to get jobs on the street, running suspicious packages between houses so the cops wouldn't arrest the owners! They aren't supposed to lose one parent to cancer, followed immediately after by the other parent's departure mentally! I didn't even DO drugs! I grew up in an area where you don't talk about others people's business, but even those degenerate cartel asshats had more money than I did, and I had to BEG just to get enough cash to feed Joe at night while my mother locked herself in her room and drank herself into oblivion!" He started shaking, his fists clenching open and closed, but he took some deep breaths and the tremors subsided. All the while, he never broke we contact. "When I got old enough to work legally, I did. Then, she started taking all the money to pay for her newfound remedies. Alcohol, cocaine, heroin, even fortune tellers, whatever let her escape the real world. Whatever let her change her 'perspective', if you will, because like I said, our reality is based on our perceptions. So, she fooled herself into thinking everything was alright." He leaned back, finally breaking his gaze from Deluge. She felt like she was released for a spell, and looked around to see it was pitch black. Just how long had they been talking? Paul sighed, much more quiet now. "I suppose she was right, in a way," he mumbled. "I worked my butt off in school, making sure I could find a college away from her that I could attend full-ride. I did well enough that I got offers from all around the country, the greatest institutions of higher learning you could think of. But... I couldn't afford any of them.. So I ended up going where I did. I have no way of contacting my sister; it's been too many years. Mom's still in a daze, and last I heard, Joe had been offered some jobs from the local gangs since they said 'your brother was such a hard worker, if you're anything like him we'll start you off high up!'" He glanced at the fire, which was just starting to lose its might. Grabbing a nearby log, he poked around the fire to stir it up before placing the log where it would burn correctly. "Anyway, you probably don't understand half of the terms I used, or even the nuances of it all. But, now you know. I'm the guy that has to put out a constant stream of happiness and joviality because, if I couldn't laugh at life, I'd be crying." He glanced up at the stars as he spoke. "Maybe, the light the stars put out is their best and brightest... The way they want others to see them, the way they wish they could see themselves. Hoping that they can positively influence another's life, or maybe fake the shining until they themselves could believe it... But, in the end, they're all dead inside." Deluge knew Paul was talking about more than the stars, but she didn't point that out. While it was true, she didn't understand much of what he'd said, she knew enough to see he had just laid his soul bare. And it was odd, she mused, how such a large and intimidating man could, under the light of the stars, so remind her of a lost puppy. "So... I guess I never told you my Dad wore a hat all the time that read 'don't be a wussy'... I think the time's come to take that advice to heart," Paul snickered halfheartedly. "What did you come up with in your meeting? And please tell me it's not some kind big frontal assault." Deluge cringed. "Well, not exactly," she said uncertainly. Paul moaned, dropping his head into his hands. “Davy Crockett would have a field day with you!” he cried. As Deluge was about to explain, apologize for his life, comfort him, just talk like her motherly instincts demanded of her, she saw Paul stiffen and stare rigidly into the darkness behind her. Deluge’s head swiveled immediately, to be greeted by the decidedly less than pleasant sight of the green pony Lyra approaching the campfire abashedly. Really, why Paul had such conflicting feelings about the stupid mare was beyond Deluge. She was an instigator, nothing more, nothing less. She had hurt him deeply, to the point that he was mentally broken and actually needed magic to heal himself. There was only one emotion associated with her: anger. She could never forgive her for that, and her hackles rose noticeably. Glancing back at Paul, she saw he had shifted uncomfortably, and was now staring back into the flames of his fire. He seemed to be debating something, about to speak one second but letting the breath go the next. After what seemed like a fairly brief struggle, he straightened, apparently coming to some sort of a conclusion. “Well, I made sure to leave an extra rabbit for any company I might have tonight. Since I’m assuming you wouldn’t want a bite Lyra, would Ms. Deluge care to taste?” Paul said, a smile cracking his visage. Deluge happily snatched the other rodent from the spit, deciding to simply sit and listen to their conversation. She’d be there if Paul needed her. Lyra gave a snort, tossing her mane. “Of course not,” she smiled back sheepishly. “Listen, I came out here because Deluge there was gone for much longer than anyone expected, but I can talk about that later. I, uh… I overheard your little talk.” She braced herself and cringed, expecting a verbal lashing like earlier and not planning on coming back with any of her own. After something like that, she couldn’t bring herself to. However, no harsh words came. She glanced at Creed, who sat with his lips pursed. He was staring at Deluge, studying her, before a smile slowly spread. “I guess I can’t be mad; Deluge is a great listener, and she has my thanks for that, but if I’m going to share with her then I think it’s only fair you hear too. You did save my life, after all.… Exactly how long were you out there, though?” Lyra blushed immediately. “Well, uh, long enough… quite some time, actually. Listen, I’m really sorry about what I said back in Twilight’s room. It was insensitive, and not to mention immature, of me to go there.” Creed nodded. “Me, too. I overstepped my bounds in trying to force my ideas on you guys… I hope you understand I only want to limit whatever damage comes to Equestria because of the Nuckelavee. Since they’re from Earth, I guess you could say they’re my responsibility.” He gave a goofy lopsided grin to show he was kidding, and Lyra giggled a little bit. She was relieved that he wasn’t mad at her, more relieved than she’d admit to herself. She still felt a deep-seeded guilt over her decision that lead to his mental collapse, and she felt a bizarre need to make it up to him. “Your Earth humans must not be any good at cleaning up your messes, then,” she joked. “You think that’s bad, you should see some of my friends’ rooms. They look worse than the old castle ruins!” he kidded right back. Lyra took a seat halfway between Paul and Deluge, leaning into the fire to ward off the slight chill in the air. She couldn’t help but to be impressed by the cozy little setup Creed had managed to construct barehanded in a matter of hours. The tree trunks that served as benches were smooth, there was a decent sized pile of firewood sitting next to him, and he had obviously done well enough hunting to satisfy himself. “How’d you find and drag all these tree trunks up here?” she asked, curious. “They would usually take a team of strong earth ponies a few hours to scour out and put in place, but you did it by yourself in the same timeframe. How’s that?” He looked at her with his eyebrows furrowed. “Twilight didn’t tell her?” he asked Deluge, who elected to simply shake her head as her mouth was filled with tender rabbit. He gave a little Hmph before turning back to Lyra, who sat on his left. “Well, where should I start?” he began. “I figured out when I was running with Twilight that I wasn’t getting winded at all, while she was completely out of breath. Later, a cut miraculously healed itself, and I was able to move rocks much larger than I would have expected.” Creed shrugged. “I just kinda realized that I was drawing magic from the sources around me, and my body was putting it to use in the form of strength, healing, and stamina. I can barely use any real magic, though; it’s limited to what small amounts I can push out in the form of either acoustic or magical waves when focused with something.” He gestured towards Deluge. “That’s how I fixed her broken rib and punctured lung, which happened in a completely unrelated-to-me incident. And I may have gotten a little mad and beat up a Nuckelavee by the name of Gomorrah… But that’s not a big deal, he wasn’t expecting it.” Deluge snickered. “You’re forgetting to mention the fact that it was actually your elbow drop that broke my rib, which you immediately reset after scaring off half my hunting pack. Then, you went outside a beat Gomorrah into a pulp and dropped him off a cliff while Twilight and I watched!” She was nearly falling off her tree trunk seat by the time she finished. “You should have seen his face when he turned around and realized he had been cursing in front of us the entire time!” Creed’s cheeks burned red, but he stood his ground even as Lyra caught the laughter bug. “In my defense, he didn’t like my impression of Gollum,” he said simply. “You know, Twilight failed to mention that little tidbit,” Lyra giggled. She noticed Creed had become much more relaxed, much quicker to smile or crack a joke. Whether or not that was because of his confession about his mother, or simply him becoming more easy around her, she couldn’t tell. But she liked it. They talked for a few minutes more before a comfortable silence drifted between them. Creed wasn’t paying any more attention to the stars, and was instead sitting with a trace of a smile on his face as he sat contemplating his memories. Lyra couldn’t help but to realize that the time had come to finally broach the subject of the upcoming battle. “Listen, Creed, I think you should know… We decided on a plan of attack.” He nodded, his face faltering for only a brief second before collecting himself. “And?” he asked, trying to appear relaxed. Unfortunately for him, you can’t lie to a liar; Lyra could tell he was hanging on her every word. “Well, we decided to take your advice, at least partially. You and Deluge are going to burrow under the Detention Hall, and free Rainbow Dash, Flotilla, and Armada.” Just as Creed was drawing breath, probably for a cheer, Lyra cut him off with a raised hoof. “However,” she continued. “There’s more: we’re sending Bon Bon with you, to act as backup. Before you argue, she’s the best fighter we have, and of anypony besides Twilight, she’d best be able to help you.” “Where are you and Twilight going to be?” Creed asked, confused. “We’re going to be in the town proper, defending ourselves and the others if need be from the Diamond Dogs, and drawing them away from you.” “Before you get mad, almost all of the Diamond Dogs are going to be at the gates trying to drive away the forest animals. That way, they won’t have the Nuckelavee whispering in their ear, they’ll be pressed from both sides, and they’ll have an entire pack telling them that standing down is the right idea” Deluge put in reassuringly. Creed rubbed his chin worriedly. “So, you’re keeping Fluttershy’s part of Operation: Cool Hoof Creed, huh?” he chuckled nervously. “That was only supposed to be a reason for the Diamond Dogs to surrender after I left for Canterlot.” Lyra shrugged. “I really did try to take your advice and limit our potential losses,” she said. “This way, the Diamond Dogs will have no choice to surrender. Those few that do choose to fight, if there are any, won’t be able to hurt anypony with Twilight, an entire new pack, and I there to deter them.” Creed sighed defeated. “I guess there’s no way I can fight this, is there?” he mumbled. “Of course you can fight it,” Lyra comforted him. “Just fight on our side. Take the Nuckelavee out of the picture as soon as possible. If you can do that, then we’ve won.” He nodded solemnly. “Alright, I guess that’s fair. Do Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie, along with that whole pack of Diamond dogs, know yet?” Deluge nodded. “We sent a runner over there with the full battle plans as soon as we drafted them. You were the last part of the plan that didn’t know.” “This sort of thing’s going to take some serious training if we want to do it right. When’s the attack scheduled?” Both of the females cringed, hearing the question they knew would set him off. “That’s the thing… uh, it’s happening at dawn tomorrow,” Lyra told Creed pensively. “Oh… oh wow…” he said, placing his hand over his heart and starting to breath rapidly. “It’s… heh… a good thing I’m not back in the tunnels right now, or I’d have another panic attack!” “’Another’?” Lyra and Deluge asked at the same time, both somewhat alarmed. “Yeah, yeah, had one on the way out earlier. Sorry, didn’t seem like a conversational piece that would come up,” he breathed hard, still clutching at his heart. “Nothing to worry about. Just some breathing exercises and I’m good as new.” Lyra and Deluge shared a look that was one part concern, one part incredulity, and one part amazement. They’d both seen panic attacks before, Deluge while in a skirmish between her hunting party and some dragons, and Lyra during a stressful martial arts competition back in Canterlot. They knew how crippling a panic attack could be, oftentimes leading to hospitalization. “You, uh… You’re not going to have a panic attack while we’re tunneling in, are you?” Deluge asked, concerned for everyone’s sake. “Nah, I’ll just take some deep breaths before we go in,” he told her. “But honestly, what the hell are the two of you doing out here right now? If this thing is going down in-” he pulled out his iPod to check the time “-nine hours, you both need to be in there getting all those Diamond Dogs and ponies ready! Go on, shoo!” He waved the two of them away, standing up and making them follow suit. Encouraging the two with pushes every once in a while whenever they slowed, Creed herded them, as he put it, ‘like cats!’ all the way back to the tunnel entrance. As they reached the entrance, Deluge immediately started down its length, assuming he would be right behind her. After a few feet and no sound of pattering feet, though, she slowed and turned. At the entrance, the silhouettes of Lyra and Paul were hugging each other- Paul on his knees, and Lyra with her forehooves thrown around his shoulders. Deluge, though she was loath to admit it, could see how easily the two of them fit together in that tight embrace. What that meant for any of them, she couldn’t tell. She saw him whisper something in Lyra’s ear that made her tremble, before standing and turning toward the tunnel. “Be safe, Deluge! I’ll be back before we start!” he called. Deluge didn’t know what to say, so she just nodded, hoping he could see her. What was he thinking? Paul turned back to the forest and sprinted away, a man on a mission. Lyra and Deluge stood watching him until he left their sight behind a particularly thick copse of trees. Lyra shook her head, then turned and started trotting into the tunnel. Deluge joined her, padding quickly by her side. “What was all that about?” she asked the pony. “I saw he told you something…” Lyra wouldn’t return Deluge’s gaze, instead staring away as she maintained her speed. “He… he dropped to his knees and just grabbed me,” she said. “He told me that he knew… he knew what I’d done. And that it was okay. That he forgave me.” _________________________________________________________________________________________ The sun was impossibly large in the evening sky. It shone its life-giving rays across the lands of Equestria, bringing energy into ecosystems and warming the creatures they contained. Everywhere, the world drank in the last golden light of the day, and Equestria itself seemed to sigh in content. But Celestia knew differently. There was a taint on her lands, the same darkness that sucked in the rays of her beloved sun greedily behind her even as she lowered it. Her subjects may take the fading light as evening’s normal progression, but it took eyes that had studied the sun for millennia to see it was fading for entirely other reasons. Even as her horn glowed and she lowered the sun, Celestia knew that there was nothing she could do. Luna and herself had been lead, chained, to this same spot each day to create the dawns and dusks the world demanded. The entire time, Lazarus stood between the Princesses and their respective charges, absorbing as much of the power as he could. That was the reason behind the sun and moon’s impossible sizes. As Lazarus suckled at the teat of power, the heavenly bodies began to diminish in brilliance. The Princesses were no different, slowly losing every single strand of magic they possessed as they drove their responsibilities closer to Equestria than would have been safe under normal circumstances. “Yet these are anything but normal circumstances,” Celestia thought bitterly to herself as her sun sank behind the horizon. Her anemic frame, her weakness, her chains were only indicative of the true problem within: she was dying. And there was absolutely nothing that could be done to stop it. Luna was no better. From the cage behind her, Celestia heard her little sister whimper as she prepared herself for the moon’s rising. It was a harrowing ordeal, to push oneself even as the strength was sapped from one’s bones. But then you simply had to push harder, hoping aginst hope there would be an end to the suffering soon. “At least he still needs us,” Celestia reminded herself. That was the one silver lining, the single thread of hope that had allowed Luna and Celestia to survive this long. Lazarus couldn’t kill them, lest he sacrifice not only his daily magical indulgence, but the world itself. “Shall I retrieve my sister for you?” Celestia asked, her chin held high. Though she was loath to speak the words, she knew that punishment for not saying them was severe. For herself, as well as Luna. He stood motionless, disrobed ad had become his style during such times. The thick black blood pumped through guttural veins and arteries, and the seemingly decomposing muscles flexed with each beat. Then Lazarus started chuckling, a roiling hiss that pierced Celestia’s mind and drive shivers into her very soul. He turned, the socket which his one eye resided glowing a brilliant, bloody red. Celestia gasped despite herself, horrified. Never had Lazarus displayed such a reaction to his daily magical feedings before, and their implications terrified her beyond words. However, for Luna’s sake, she gathered herself. Once again she became the visage of royal benevolence. The chuckling didn’t cease, even as Lazarus rose on of his torso’s arms. Without breaking eye contact with Celestia, the light from his single orb diminished suddenly to a smoldering ember. As Celestia and her sister watched, stricken with fear, they saw the first sliver of the moon appear at the other end of the horizon. As Lazarus raised his arm, a single finger glowed with a light that one couldn’t quite see when they looked straight at it. If she had to describe it, Celestia would have said it was off-white, somewhere between opaque and purple. The moon began to follow its normal course, rising simultaneously with Lazarus’s finger. “I don’t believe that will be nesssesssary, my dear Sssselessstia,” he hissed from within the Princesses’ minds.