//------------------------------//
// II.2 - Conflicted Loyalties 
// Story: Night 
// by Revenant Wings 
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	When I woke up, it was very early in the morning and the Golden Oaks Library and the rest of Ponyville was quiet with sleep.  The moon shone brightly outside, providing enough light to see the town and the fields beyond without needing to turn on a light.  The light of the moon cast a pale, eerie glow over the town as I carefully walked outside my room and as quietly as I could over to a balcony that looked out over Ponyville.  The balcony was covered by the branches of the tree and I enjoyed the little shelter I had sitting there, watching an orange figure flying around under the nighttime sky, thinking.
It was on a night like this that I ran away from home once.  I had just finished my grade school education and had received a diploma from a school.  I didn’t have much money but I had gotten myself a job, so I crawled out my bedroom window and left.  I wanted to follow my sister’s steps and go to our grandmother’s house, but I didn’t have enough money for a ticket.  I contemplated running away again that night, away from Twilight, from Princess Celestia and Cadence, from Shining Armor and Revenant Wings.  But… where to?
“I never thought I’d see you again so soon, Nemo.”
Startled out of my reverie, I looked around to see where the voice had come from.  It took me a minute to see that the orange figure had come closer to reveal itself as a golden pegasus mare with a mane like fire and a fiery thunderbolt for a cutie mark hovering just off the balcony with easy flaps of her wings.
“Spitfire, is it?” I said upon recognizing the pegasus.  “It’s been a while since I met you at the Wonderbolts Derby back in Canterlot.  What time is it?”
“About four in the morning,” Spitfire replied.  “Couldn’t sleep?”
“Oh, I slept fine,” I said.  “I just went to bed earlier last night than I usually do.”
Spitfire gently landed on the balcony and trotted over to me.  “So, what brings you down from Canterlot to Ponyville?”
“I got into a disagreement of sorts with Princess Luna,” I told her.  “The others figured it’d be better for me if I came her and got away from the castle, saw something new, that maybe it would help calm me down.”
Spitfire sighed.  “Yeah, I like small towns like this.  It’s nice to be able to come somewhere where everyone knows your name and you’re welcomed like family.”
Family…  “I don’t have much of a family anywhere at the moment…”
“Right…” Spitfire said.  “Sorry about bringing that up.”
“No, it’s alright.”
There was a moment of silence between us.
“So… when did you get here?”
“Yesterday evening.”
“And… how long are you here for?”
“Until the Summer Sun Celebration.  Then Princess Celestia is sending me back…”  I couldn’t finish the sentence.
Spitfire blinked.  “What do you mean?”
I arched an eyebrow.  “Why do you care?  Do you just want me to stay for you to have on your team?”
“I understand it shouldn’t be any of my personal business,” Spitfire said calmly.  “However, when a team member is low on morale, part of my duty is to make sure that morale is boosted back up.  Even if you don’t sign up, you’re friends with two of the Elements of Harmony, two of the princesses and have a kindred bond with the Captain of the Solar Guard.  Since part of the duties of the Wonderbolts is to assist any of those groups when necessary, you’re as much a part of my duties and responsibilities as any one of them.”
I looked around, struggling to find the right words to explain to Spitfire.  “I was considering running away,” I told her.
“Running away?” Spitfire asked incredulously.  “But… where to?”
“I don’t know!” I said, getting up from my seat and wandering the balcony.  “Anywhere that isn’t here.  This place doesn’t feel like home to me.  But at this point nowhere feels like home to me.  I can’t stay in Canterlot with the rest of them, I can’t stay here in Ponyville with anyone here, but I can’t go… go to…”  Words failed me yet again.
“You can’t go where?”
“…back home.”
“Why not?”
“Because it doesn’t feel like it anymore!” I shouted.  I realized how loud I was after seeing Spitfire flinching and calmed myself down before continuing.  “I can’t go back home because it doesn’t feel like home anymore.  I can’t stay here because it never felt like home here to begin with.  I don’t know what to do anymore…”
There was a look of melancholy in Spitfire’s face that I couldn’t quite see.  She flapped her wings and hovered in the air in front of me, gently placing a hoof on my shoulder.  “It’s okay, Nemo,” she said gently.  “I understand it’s hard having to be here so long, but you need to remember that Celestia had promised you she would send you back home and you always have the choice to go back home or stay here.  I can’t say I know anything of what life is like back there, but if that’s your choice I’m sure that Princess Celestia will agree to it.”
I nodded.  “Thank you, Spitfire.  Thank you for listening.”
Spitfire smiled at me.  “I’d love to stick around and chat a bit more, but I have to make sure my new recruits are waking up on time.  If you need somepony to talk to, feel free to come around our offices in Ponyville and talk.  Remember: you’re friends with some powerful ponies, and it’s my duty to take care of you as much as it is to take care of them when they need it.”
“Thank you, again.”
Spitfire gave me a salute and took off into the sky once again.  I watched her until she was no more than a speck against the darkness of the night sky, like a firefly or a satellite flittering around, and continued watching her until long after the fiery orange coat had disappeared.

*	*	*

The sun was peaking over the horizon when I returned inside the library.  I had entered the study expecting to return to my room for a while longer when I saw Twilight sitting on her ledge looking at me.
“I heard you screaming earlier,” she said.  “Is everything alright?”
I sighed.  “I figure I should tell you what’s been happening to me over these last two months.”
Twilight motioned to a spot on her bed next to her and I sat down on the bed and began telling her everything that happened.  I stopped only at two points, for us to have breakfast and lunch, as I told her everything that had happened.  I told her of how Celestia had brought me here but I had become amnesiac in the crossing and forgot most of my former life.  I told her of how I had become friends with Shining Armor and Princess Cadence but that Princess Luna never liked my appearance.  I told her of Celestia planning to create the kindred bond between me and Shining Armor in order to get me to stay and how that had (mostly) failed.
And then I told her of the lessons I took with Princess Luna.  I told her of the homework assignments and the scolding and the scowling and the refusal to even grade my papers correctly.  I told her of Princess Celestia’s intervention after the memory spell that caused me to accidentally hit Princess Luna, and I even told her of the argument I had with her about Nightmare Moon.
By the time dinner rolled around, I had finally finished and Twilight was deep in thought.  It wasn’t until after dinner was prepared that she finally spoke.  “You know, you’re right on most accounts.”
“You mean… you agree with me?”
Twilight nodded.  “Princess Luna is nice, but she hardly ever gets out.  She’s come here for Nightmare Night a few times and was present at the wedding of Shining Armor and Princess Cadence.  However, she spends little time outside of Canterlot and the castle.  There are those that respect her, but she doesn’t exactly have any ‘friends’ so to speak… besides me.”
“You’re friends with her?”
“Spend your first day in Ponyville taking down a mad god under the influence of a tainted shadow and you’re likely to make a few friends on that day alone.  Matter of fact, that was the only part you got wrong: as far as I know, I’m the only true friend she has.”
I looked around as I ate my sandwich Twilight had made for dinner.
“What if I told you I thought about running away?”	
Twilight put a hoof to her chin.  “Well, I suppose I can’t blame you.”
“How is that?”
“Well, you’re not exactly where you think home is, are you?”
“That depends on your definition of home.”
“So… define ‘home’ as you see it.”
“Well… home is where you feel comfortable.  Home is where you feel safe.  Home is where you walk in and everyone accepts you.  Home is where your family is.  Home is where you’re able to settle down and not have to worry.  Maybe… maybe most of all, home is where you feel like you belong, like you can identify with those around you.”
“…and you don’t feel any of those?”
“I do feel safe, safer than I’ve ever felt.  If I were to walk in to Canterlot Castle, I’d have ponies there that would accept me with open hooves.  But… I don’t have any family and I don’t feel comfortable.  I find it hard to identify with all of you ponies who have been here your whole lives.  I… I don’t belong.”
“What about back on Earth?  Did you feel any of those?”
It was a question I hadn’t considered.  “E-every day was a fight for my life.  I would go to work and find myself constantly under threat of losing my job.  I had to take an extra year of class because I dropped out of high school and ended up being seen as a delinquent because of it.  I had no family I could go to; my sister ran away to my grandparents but I didn’t have the money to follow her.  And I worried.  I worried every day about whether or not I was going to make it the next month.”
Twilight didn’t respond for a long while.  “Well… have you ever considered why you don’t want to stay here?”
I eyed Twilight suspiciously.  “You’re not doing this because the Princesses asked you, are you?”
“No,” Twilight replied, surprisingly calm.  “I asked of my own curiosity.  You don’t have to answer if you don’t want.”
I thought about my answer for a minute before responding.  “I… I don’t know.  I sort of just assumed I didn’t belong here and that I would belong there.  I suppose I never really gave much thought into if I belonged there.”
Twilight got out of her seat and came over to be, placing a hoof on my shoulder.  “Give it time, Nemo.  I wasn’t sure where I belonged when I first became an alicorn, whether I should adopt the life of royalty and live in Canterlot or if I belonged in Ponyville with all my friends.  You just need to take the time to think about where you feel you belong and what feels right to you.  You still have a month.  Until then… well, enjoy the ride.”
With that, Twilight walked off to her study, leaving me alone to think about what she just said.