February 7 1005
I got out of bed around 9 o'clock this morning to start getting ready for my day at Rarity's place. After a quick shower and some breakfast, my father and I were ready to go. He accompanied me again, for safety. Even though the Princess had told everypony in town to not hurt me, I still felt afraid. I know it is an irrational fear, it would be difficult for them to actually damage me seriously, but I think it is the feeling of being attacked that I fear. After arriving at Carousel Boutique my father arranged with Rarity to pick me up at half past five, when he finishes work, he then had to leave in a hurry as he was already running late.
Rarity, looking as pristine as she always seems to, turned to me. “Well, come on in darling, I must say I've been looking forward to this.”
“Why is that?” I asked.
“Well darling, how do I put this, I've never had the chance to mold a pony's behavior quite so, extensively before. We really are just about starting from scratch aren't we?”
“Yes, I suppose we are, is that a good thing?”
“Oh, I think so yes. You see, starting from scratch means I can teach you what you need to know without you having to unlearn any bad habits you may have developed otherwise.” Rarity then smiled, she seemed quite excited to be teaching me. “Now darling, why don't you tell me about any previous attempts you have made at walking naturally.”
“Okay, first I tried studying general pony movements but quickly discovered that there were far to many variables. So, next I tried analyzing a single pony's movement patterns. I wanted to collect data from a single subject over a longer period, instead of watching many ponies as they walked past me. I chose my mother as she is the only mare I could observe for long periods, at this time I had only left the house two times you see.” I explained.
“Uh huh, go on, what did you learn?” She asked.
“I learned that although my mother has a aesthetically pleasing way of walking and moving in general, much as you do Rarity, her movements are never identical when observed closely. The movement she uses to, for example, pick up a knife and even her cutting technique, are never quite the same speed or indeed the same movement. There are always slight variances in elbow and wrist movements. This turned out to be true of all her movements, any attempt at copying one of her walking movements precisely usually ended up in me almost losing my balance.”
“Oh dear, didn't you ask your mother for help with this?” Rarity asked.
“No, at the time I did not consider this a matter of much importance, I was just experimenting, of course this was many days before I realized how different I must seem to other ponies. I do not think my mother even realized I was observing her.” I told her.
“I see, well, I think I know where you are going wrong, and this may be more difficult than I thought, but no matter, it will simply take more time.”
“Rarity, on the topic of time, are you sure that you can spare the time to do this with me? Your shop is currently open is it not?”
“Oh yes darling it is, but don't worry I don't have any orders to work on currently, nor do I have any fitting appointments scheduled for tody. If a customer walks in I may have to leave you for a few minutes but I'm sure it won't take long.”
“Okay, I just do not wish to be in the way.” I said.
“Oh nonsense darling, you're not in the way at all, and come to think of it if there is time maybe I can help you with your speech too.” Rarity said with a thoughtful expression.
“My speech?”
“Yes my dear, your speech is so, exact, you have a beautiful voice you'd sound divine if you would speak more, naturally. Don't worry though, even if we can't fit it in today, I'll teach about that some other time okay.” She said smiling at me hopefully.
“Okay, you said earlier that you think you know where I went wrong in trying to walk naturally, can you tell me about it?”
“Of course, you see, the problem you are having is that you're trying to analyze walking in a mathematical kind of way.”
“That is correct, I was trying to derive a series of movements” I explained.
“Yes dear, and that's the problem, walking gracefully isn't a science, it's an art.” She stated firmly.
“I do not understand, how can something so intrinsic to pony life be an art form?”
“It's simple dear, you said yourself that your mothers movents were 'aesthetically pleasing' yes?” Rarity asked.
“Yes, her movements seemed graceful and fluid, watching her work in the kitchen was, comforting.”
“Well, what is art if not a thing that evokes emotion, hmm?” She asked.
“You have a point there, dance is considered an art form, why not movement in general.” I pondered out loud.
“Exactly darling, if done properly of course.” Rarity said. “Now, I guess I have to think of a way to teach you this that you can understand, hmmm. Well, how about instead of walking we start with some simple gestural movements and work our way up?”
“Okay, that sounds logical.”
“Alright, this is a gesture I'm sure you've seen many times.” She moved her hoof up and swept it from left to right and then placed it back down. “It is to indicate everything in the general area, for example.” She turned to the right slightly as if addressing someone else in the room. “I need all of this gone.” She repeated the gesture to her imaginary counterpart. “Do you see darling?”
“Yes, I understand, I am familiar with the gesture.” As I said this I performed the same gesture although not as elegantly as Rarity had.
“No no no darling, you're movement are far to sharp and quick.” her eyes then moved up in a thoughtful expression. “Your movements need to flow more, oh how do I explain this? Um, okay, let me put it this was, none of your joints should change direction too sharply, see how I do it.” She repeated the gesture. “See how I lift my hoof and sweep it around and put it down again in one continuous movement. You shouldn't be able to tell where the lifting becomes the sweeping and the sweeping becomes the putting back down motion. Does that make sense?” She asked with a hopeful expression.
“I see, so the whole action should be performed in one flowing arc.”
“Yes!” She exclaimed “Now you try it.”
I performed a sweeping gesture almost like I was trying to draw a circle in the air, to my surprise it actually looked natural, at least it did to me. “How is this?” I asked as I did it again.
“That's much better darling!” Rarity had a huge smile on her face, apparently it looked natural to her too. “But, it isn't quite a sweeping motion, more of a circle motion.” She added. “Try flattening the arc a bit at the top so it's almost but not quite flat.”
I did as she asked, and it seemed to work. “Is this better?”
“Yes! oh that is fantastic darling!” She seemed to barely be containing her excitement, I smiled at her enthusiasm.
“Now, we just have to get some emotion behind it, put the gesture into context, yes?”
“Okay.” I turned to face the rest of the room. “Everything in this room is beautiful.” I said while performing the gesture again. “How was that?” I looked to Rarity.
“That was fantastic darling, you sounded so sincere too.”
“I was being sincere, I do not believe in lying for any purpose.” I responded.
“Really? You really think my work is beautiful?” She asked with a hopeful smile.
“Yes, I think you do wonderful work Rarity. Of course my knowledge of fashion and aesthetics in general is rather limited.” I replied.
“Be that as it may, thank you for the compliment darling, it's nice to feel appreciated every now and again.”
As the morning went on Rarity and I went through several more gestures. I came to realize that I could develop a more natural movement simply by using an algorithm that limited the rate of change of the angle of my joints. Of course finding the optimal rate of change for every joint and every movement will take some calibration, but it is progress.
We took a break for lunch, Rarity was kind enough to make me a cucumber and carrot sandwich, and some tea to go with it. I was sure to thank her for her generosity. Rarity said that after lunch we will try walking gracefully. With my new approach I hoped it would not take long to perfect, but I imagine it will still take many hours.
At about two o' clock, as we were working on the finer details of walking, the bell above the shop door rang, we were near the back of the main room using a space behind some dress forms as a 'runway', I did not understand the term as it was walking I was practicing, not running. “Coming!” Called Rarity to her new customer. then as she turned to go attend to them said over her shoulder. “Keep practicing that okay, I'll be right back.” I nodded.
I walked up and down the 'runway' a few more times. could hear Rarity talking to her customer, I recognized the voice as Fluttershy. As I became visible at the end of the line of dress forms Rarity called over to me. “Oh Amber darling, come over and say hello to Fluttershy, we can get back to practicing in a few minutes.” I trotted over to the two ponies using my new walking style to the best of my ability.
“Oh Amber, you're walking so wonderfully, you've done so much in one day.” Fluttershy said before I could even greet her, not that I minded, it was nice to see her not being so timid. I smiled at her compliment.
“Thank you Fluttershy, and how are you today?” I asked her.
“Oh, I'm very well thank you. I was just in town picking up some groceries and thought I'd drop in on my friend Rarity.” She said with a smile. “Oh, and to see how you were doing of course.” She quickly added, looking horrified that she forgot to mention me. I smiled to let her know that I was not offended.
“Thank you Fluttershy, that was thoughtful of you, I am doing well. Rarity and I are making significant progress with my walking technique.” I informed her.
“I can see that, you look beautiful walking that way.” Fluttershy said.
“Thank you Fluttershy, I hope one day I can look as beautiful as you and Rarity do while walking.” Both mares blushed slightly at this.
“Oh, um, I-I'm not that b-beautiful, a-and you're already more beautiful than me.” Fluttershy stammered. I looked at her with confusion.
“Why do have such a low opinion of yourself, you're easily one of the prettiest mares in town, from what I have observed.” I told her, she blushed furiously.
“Yes darling, Amber is quite right, you really shouldn't put yourself down like that. There's being humble and then there's putting yourself down. you know.” Rarity said to Fluttershy.
“Oh, um, thank you girls, you're right I guess I-I am... pretty.” Fluttershy said in a voice almost too quiet for even me to hear.
“Yes you are darling, I know you don't like to be reminded of it but you were a famous model for a little while.” Rarity said to Fluttershy, then she turned to me. “Although Amber, I have to ask, how are you certain of your opinion of Fluttershy's beauty? You said earlier that your knowedge of aesthetics is limited.”
“That comment was in reference to clothing, I do have some knowledge on the female form however. I once read a book on the subject, before I had ever left the house, to see if my father had done a good job constructing my form to mimic a typical mare. Also although I have not been outside much in life I have overheard several conversations while I have been outside. Several of these conversations concerned Fluttershy.” I told them. Both mares gasped lightly at this information.
“Well, what did they say about Fluttershy?” Rarity asked, she seemed a little worried.
“Well, two mares wished they were as graceful as you.” I nodded to Fluttershy. “One mare said she wished her mane were as silky as yours, and one stallion said you were, and I quote 'the most beautiful sight in Equestria', end quote.” I finished my summary. By this time Fluttershy was blushing intensely, and Rarity was smiling at her friend.
“See darling, we aren't the only ones who think you're beautiful, and it seems you have at least one gentlecolt admirer.” She then turned to me. “I don't suppose you know who this stallion was do you?” She asked me.
“I am sorry, no, I may be able to recognize his voice if I heard it again, but I am not sure I got a sufficient audio sample for that.” I do apologise.” I said aiming my last sentence toward Fluttershy.
“That's okay, I don't think I want to know.” Fluttershy said quickly.
“Why ever not darling?” Rarity asked.
“Because if I knew who he was I'd never be able to look at him again, I'd be too embarrassed too. I mean what if he say me looking and came over to me and asked me out, that's too much pressure.” She said in a panicked voice while she was curling up into a ball on the floor.
“Darling, calm down, it's okay.” Rarity said while lightly stroking Fluttershy's mane.
I could understand what Fluttershy was feeling. I decided the best way I had to comfort her was to show her she was not alone in her fear. As Rarity was already using the mane stroking technique I would have used in this situation, I instead lay on the floor in front of her so I could look into her eyes.
“It is alright Fluttershy.” I said softly. “I understand how you feel, I do not have any significant knowledge of romance either. I think if a stallion asked me out, I would be afraid too. Afraid of hurting his feelings if I said something wrong, afraid of looking silly by saying something completely out of place. It would be quite the anxiety inducing experience I think.” She lifted her eyes a little, looking at me hopefully, so I continued “I think if that were ever to happen to you, you should tell him you need time to think about it, and then get abvice from your friends or family. I admit I am only guessing here but I think any stallion who wants a romantic relationship with you will be willing to give you time to consider it.” Fluttershy smiled, and slowly stretched up into a sitting position, I did the same.
“You're right Amber, if that ever happens, I just need to ask for time, and think about it calmly and talk to my friends.” Fluttershy said looking at me, then she looked down at the floor again. “Sorry about that, I just get panicky sometimes.”
“It is quite alright Fluttershy, I think it is a good thing, it shows you care about how others feel.” I smiled at her.
“O-oh, t-thank you, Amber.” Fluttershy said starting to blush again. “Um, I'd best be going, I have some animals to attend to this afternoon.” She added.
“Oh of course darling, don't let us keep you, see you soon Fluttershy.” Rarity said.
“Okay bye Rarity, bye Amber, um, I hope to see you again soon.” Fluttershy said looking at me.
“I hope to see you again soon too Fluttershy.” I smiled at her. “See you later.” With that Fluttershy left the boutique.
“That was very nice, what you did for Fluttershy.” Rarity said smiling at me.
“Thank you Rarity, I just wanted to help her, and I do understand her fear in that regard. Although I doubt I will ever have to worry about a stallion asking me to be in a romantic relationship with him.”
“Oh I wouldn't be so sure of that darling, you do have quite a nice figure, and your mane, properly styled, could be amazing. By the time we have you walking and talking more naturally, I think you'll have stallions lining up to be with you.” Rarity said.
“You think so?” I asked feeling a bit anxious about this.
'Mmhmm.” Rarity said while nodding.
“Then, what will I do if that happens?” I was starting to get very worried about the prospect of being desirable to stallions, yes I want friends, but romance is something I am clearly not ready for.
Rarity laughed a little. “Then you follow your own advice, talk to your friends, you have a number of them already you know.” She said smiling at me.
I calmed down upon hearing that. “You are right, that is exactly what I should do.” I smiled. “After the events of two days ago, I thought I would never have friends.”
“Oh darling, I know that must have been terrifying for you, and I was frankly appalled at the behavior of those ponies when I heard about it. However, you do have friends now, and we'll look out for you, always.” Rarity said in a soothing voice, then she came over to me and hugged me. It amazes me what can change in two days, the feeling of loneliness that I had then is completely gone now. I have confidence in myself again, and I think I made a new friend in Fluttershy. I think I would like to spend a lot more time with her, she is so pleasant to be around.
Rarity and I got back to my walking lesson and by the time five o'clock came around I had perfected it. Rarity said I was walking like a true lady, I had smiled with pride when she said that. My father came and picked me up at half past five as arranged. Rarity and I had just finished drinking tea and talking a little. On the way home I walked with my new technique, which of course I would be using from now on. My father was smiling at me with pride the whole way home. When I showed my mother my new walking style, she clapped her hooves with happiness and hugged me, telling me how proud she was of me. Tomorrow I may visit Fluttershy at her cottage, despite how quietly and awkwardly she speaks, Rarity tells me she may be able to help me speak more naturally, but even if she can not it would be nice just to see her again.