//------------------------------// // STOP SINGING, LULU! // Story: Little loony Luna and crazy caffeinated Celestia's life in Canterlot // by Vidhwansak //------------------------------// STOP SINGING, LULU! "...And who's this cute little button?!" The mare in the nurses outfit that Celestia was talking to smiled as she introduced the little filly in the bed. "This is Starshine! Say hello to Princess Celestia, dear!" Starshine looked up at Celestia with wide eyes and her mouth slightly open, trying to contain the excitement and awe in meeting Celestia; so far, she was doing really, really well to not have burst out by now in some way. Even some older ponies freaked out at the sight of Celestia, something that Twilight Sparkle had yet to be remedied of. Eventually, the filly managed to put together a few words. "You're...So big!" Celestia smiled at the filly, although inwardly, she winced; she felt like she was just called fat by a little filly, but she wasn't going to hold it against her. Wars were fought over by less. "Yes, I am, little one. I'm also a pretty princess! Are you a pretty princess too?" The filly's eyes grew even wider at the question, and she gave a little squeak before nodding at Celstia. "Yes! I'm a pretty princess too!" The nurse chuckled, and reached into a nearby refrigerator for a juice box for the filly, which, thankfully, Celestia could see that it was not banana flavored. The nurse only managed to open the refrigerator and stick her hoof in halfway towards the juice box as suddenly, a small group of royal guards, numbering five, two of them among Luna's lunar guard, while the three other her solar guard, entered the room. They were composed of two unicorns, two earth ponies, and one pegasus; the pegasus and two earth ponies were hers, while the unicorns were among Luna's guard. Needless to say, the sight of the royal guards entering the room caused the filly to whimper in fear; Celestia frowned, and wondered what could have caused five royal guards to suddenly want to seek her out. She did explicitly say that she didn't want to be disturbed while visiting a hospital for children, as the guards would most likely frighten them, so she expected a very good reason for why they intruded upon her now, of all times. She took a moment to take in their ranks, and immediately singled out the highest ranking guard among them. "Sergeant Morning Flower, what is the meaning of this? I thought I had very specific orders to not interrupt me. Unless there is a dire emergency, it can wait." The earth pony sergeant she named sighed, and looked back towards the other guards, who nudged her onward; the actions weren't missed by Celestia, and it took awhile for the sergeant to compose herself to say the dreadful words that Celestia never, ever wanted to hear. "I'm...Sorry for interrupting your visit to the hospital, Princess Celestia, but...Your sister is singing." Celestia groaned as took off into the skies back to the castle after bidding the nurse a hasty farewell; the pegasus guard, Radiant Rainbows, was flying alongside her, giving her more detailed information about what was going on in the castle and what the current situation was. It was, as sergeant Morning Flower had said, 'very bad'. "It's chaos that would even be too much for Discord himself, mam, pardon for speaking of your sister's 'singing' as such; however, the entire castle staff has evacuated the area, and we're waiting on your orders, as we assumed that you'd have a lot more experience with your sister's...'Singing'. We are at a total loss as to what else we should have done, so the only logical option left was to disrupt your visit to the hospital." 'You have no idea behind the truth of the words you spoke' groaned Celestia inwardly, remembering the times that Luna would sing in the shower; in fact, she wondered why it only became a problem now, her sister was usually quiet in her singing. "As much as I enjoy my hospital visits, you are right in summoning me from them; yes, I do have experience with my sister's 'singing', and I'm glad you have left the castle before you passed out from her sheer...'Intensity'. I love my dear sister, but I wished she had left her 'singing' on the moon." The rest of the flight was made in silence as the two ponies pushed themselves to reach the castle, and before long, they spotted a large group of ponies standing just outside the castle. Figuring them to be the castle staff and guards stationed at the castle, Celestia pulled into a dive towards them, and ponies began to cheer when they saw the solar princess touch down on the ground. "My little ponies! Do not worry, I'll have the situation under control soon!" With that short statement accompanied by the cheers of the castle staff, Celestia launched herself back up into the air to more quickly reach the castle; it was funny, really, how she was needed to stop her sister from singing. Unfortunately, Luna sang...Quite badly. Apparently, loudly, as well, as it was quite evident by the ponies standing outside of the castle, and the fact that Luna's voice was faintly heard even from this distance...She considered classifying Luna's singing as a weapon of mass destruction. All to soon, she was standing just outside the castle entrance, and she knew that she didn't want to hear what was on the other side. She also knew, however, that this was for Equestria, and the less ponies that heard Luna's 'singing', the better. That meant, however, that she would be directly confronting Luna's singing in full force, alone... She wished she had backup, or at least a pair of ear plugs. Nevertheless, she pushed open the great doors that led into the dining room... ...And was nearly blown back from the force of Luna's 'singing', which, unfortunately for Celestia, was even louder than the royal Canterlot voice; the only thing that prevented Celestia from retreating in fear was the fact that Celestia had the unfortunate experience of dealing with Luna's singing on multiple occasions, and that she knew how to block (Most) of her sister's 'singing' from her eardrums by imagining her sister eating apples. That humorous thought always helped her whenever she needed to stop Luna from singing; however, a thousand years of not hearing her sister sing meant that she was probably pretty rusty at stopping her, not to mention that Luna's singing seemed to have gotten even worse. "I swear, Lulu, I will teach you how to sing properly one of these days. QUIETLY. Either that, or I'll be forced to do the one thing I'd dearly love to do, stop you from singing!" She walked into the castle, her ears flickering towards the general direction where her sister's voice was coming from; fortunately, she just seemed to be in her room, which made it all the easier for her to reach Luna. Unfortunately, that was not the case; every step she took towards Luna's room was, well, another step towards Luna herself. Every step increased the volume, and with every step, Celestia swore that she was drowning in the noise that Luna was putting out. Her bones seemed to rattle from the deathly voice that was her sister's, and she briefly wondered what life would be like, deaf. At least she wouldn't have to listen to Blueblood trying to convince her to make him some macaroni and cheese, only for him to take it and try to make a quick bit on E-Bay. It was amusing, but she wasn't going to make macaroni and cheese for him, only to see it being sold and not eaten. Seemly forever and all too soon at the same time, she found herself at Luna's door. Composing herself, she took in a deep breath before she smashed the door down by ramming her head through it; she could have it repaired later, and it wasn't as if the door itself was anything special. Right now, the most important thing was silencing her sister, not an old door. Celestia's mane was frayed, messy, and had splinters inside of it, and she did not have an amused look on her face as she opened her mouth to scream at Luna. "STOP SINGING, LULU! YOU'RE SCARING EVERYPONY WITH THAT FAUST FORSAKEN SINGING OF YOURS!" Unfortunately, her sister wasn't responding, and Celestia's look of anger had melted into a look of confusion that changed into horror as she finally grasped the entirety of the situation that she was in; her sister was dancing around wildly with her eyes closed, hooves flailing about randomly in a way that managed to actually be worse than her student (She mentally reminded herself that she should get the both of them dance instructors), and in Luna's magical grasp was a rather recent pony invention, dubbed the iHOOF, which could store songs for anypony to listen to whenever they felt so inclined. Celestia had praised the invention for its creativity, ease of use, and ability to have your own personal music on the go. Right now, she was starting to have second ideas about the iHOOF. Luna suddenly twirled in her direction, and Celestia barely had time to throw herself out of the way while Luna spun around like a tornado of death, then went back to flailing herself around. Groaning, Celestia picked herself off the ground, noting the dust that had accumulated on her coat. "I'm going to have a word with the maids that were supposed to clean up your room, Lulu. Anyway, please forgive me for what I'm going to do next!" Empowering her horn with her radiant magic glow, she enveloped it over the iHoof, and tugged at it violently, ripping it away from Luna's grasp and ears. Luna stopped in the middle of a mid-air somersault, defying gravity, wondering why the music suddenly stopped before gravity showed her that it did not take kindly to upstarts defying it, even if they were alicorns. "Oof! Ow...My music..." "Your singing scared everypony off." Surprised, Luna looked over towards the sound of the voice, and smiled. "Tia, you're..." Her voice died as she saw how disheveled Celestia looked like, the low snarling coming from her, and the unamused looked that she was being given made Luna feel like she was staring at death itself; she squeaked, and jumped up to her hooves. "...I'm...In big trouble, aren't I?" Celestia nodded once, and tossed Luna's iHOOF away, where it landed softly on her bed. "Yep." Luna gulped, and began to back up slowly, wondering if she'd get out alive. "...Faust hel-" "FAUST WON'T HELP YOU NOW LULU!" Celestia dived for Luna, who scampered out of the way. Carpenters, architects, and construction ponies alike would be later pleased with the amount of work they had to do in the castle.