//------------------------------// // The Parade // Story: In Good Company // by PseudoFiction //------------------------------// The Parade The Royal Guard Parade was an annual affair. It was a chance for everypony to see those stoic guardsponies who guarded the princesses and their palace with unflinching resolve in a different setting. Instead of seeing the silent, still and unmoving stallions and mares of the Royal Guard, the general populace would be able to see them do something a little different. But let’s be honest. It was still just a pony-show. However, the Canterlot Stadium was packed with ponies from all walks of life regardless. Both Princess Celestia and Princess Luna attended every year by default, standing tall in the VIP booth at the very top of the stadium. It was the only time they could be seen in public without their guardsponies flanking them. After all, the stadium was packed with combat-ready Royal Guard anyway. The event had started with a short but reasonably impressive Wonderbolts show as the ‘best fliers in Equestria’ – more like the ‘most overrated showoffs in Equestria’ – showed off some fancy loops and spins. Most guardsponies failed to see what made the Wonderbolts so impressive, even if the Wonderbolts were home to ex-Royal Guard pegasi. A while back they had been dispatched to deal with a dragon in Ponyville – sending show-fliers to deal with a dragon; yeah, that sounds like a good idea – an operation that had failed miserably. Now had active serving Royal Guard pegasi been dispatched the problem would have been dealt with swiftly. And this fact was made all the more apparent when the Royal Guard Pegasus Fast Recon Regiment followed a quick show following the Wonderbolts. Alas, even though they showed off much more impressive manoeuvres in company strong formations, they had less fireworks, less wreckless stunts and less shiny lights; and thus elicited less of an applause from the crowds who had come to see. Everypony knew it was mainly the Wonderbolts on the promotional posters for the annual parade that enticed most ponies to attend. The Royal Guard pegasi had been followed by a few select companies of unicorns parading the stadium. There had been a few drills showing off swordsmanship, spears, bows, etcetera. Unfortunately, earth-pony regiments had very little to show off. All three regiments, the mechanised, engineering and shields regiments just waited silently in line, standing to attention under the watchful eyes of their regimental commanders. Colonel Hard Candy was keeping her gaze completely fixed on Stonewall Company as they stood shoulder to shoulder with the rest of the Earth-Pony Shields Regiment. All the while Archer Company from the Unicorn Ranged Infantry Regiment marched out to the central square for the final show of the day. That would make the final show for the Sol Guard before the parade resumed after sun-down for the Lunar Guard show. The unicorns would no doubt do some kind of silent-drill that blew all other drills out of the water. It was usually an impressive sight to behold. In the midst of the still bodies of Stonewall Company however, everything was quiet… until a particular earth-pony opened his mouth. “This is ridiculous.” The pony hissed so only his fellows including the staff sergeant could hear. “We’re warriors, sarge! Not prancer-ponies!” Private Brute Force chuckled. “Rich coming from you, Shadow Prancer.” “Ah, eat me!” Shadow Prancer retorted. “Shut it, you foals!” Staff Sergeant Buckshot scowled through his cigar stub. “When the princess says prance, you prance! Now you’ll prance like a pretty filly and you’ll like it!” “We haven’t done much prancing since we got here, sarge.” Private Brute Force stated. “We slated to actually do something?” “We’re marching in the final fly-by for the end of the show.” Buckshot said. Looking sideways to Steel Block, Brute Force gave a little smirk. “Isn’t the final fly-by a mandatory march for all regiments?” “Eyes forward.” Steel hissed. Tiredly turning his gaze forward again, he watched the unicorns from one of Archer Company’s squads stomp to a halt and twist sharply to one side, forming a single long line diagonally across the square. While they faced the princess’ booth and stood to attention all their heads smoothly cocked to one side to watch an approaching figure. Breaking ranks from the other waiting unicorn companies was a tall figure. It stood upright on two legs and towered a good two head-heights above the sea of ponies surrounding it. The body was clad in a heavily modified version of the Royal Guard uniform. A light grey set of fatigues covered the figure, with gold coloured plates of armour laid over the top. The plates covered the chest and back, as well as the forearms and the lower legs around the boots. A helmet was perched over the head with a crest fanning like a silver Mohawk across the scalp. Centred on Corporal Who’s chest plate was the emblem of Archer Company. Joining the ranks of his squad, the human fluidly marched to a halt and turned sharply on his heel. As he stomped into a tight attentive posture once more, the privates from Archer Company put under his command snapped their heads up to the princesses. As one the entourage saluted; paused; and then very slowly and smoothly lowered their saluting limbs. Not once was an order issued. The stadium was bathed in complete silence as the crowds watched Archer Company’s silent-drills pulled off with choreographed perfection. Corporal Iron Gates immediately turned slack-jawed at the sight. He wasn’t impressed by the silent-drill, he’d seen them plenty of times before. His shock came at the sight of the human. “Holy hay! Look at that. Is that who I think it is?” “Didn’t you guys hear?” Steel Block rumbled almost proudly. “Who passed! He’s in the Sol Guard! Unicorn Ranged Infantry Regiment” “Who passed?” Mercury asked. “Who’s in?” “Yes!” Steel Block confirmed. That just deepened the mare’s frown. “Yes, what? Who are we talking about?” “Who the human!” Steel Block stated obviously. “Who’s the who-man?” Realising he was being had, Steel’s eyelids sagged sarcastically. “... sunova-diamond dog. You’re doing that on purpose, aren’t you?” Mercury smiled at how easy it was to get Steel Block worked up about his human friend. “So the big monkey is a Royal Guard now. Doesn’t mean I like him.” “Nopony said anything about you liking him...” Steel Block glanced sideways with a pause. “And are you drooling?” he added confoundedly. Mercury quickly wiped away the drool dribbling over her lips as she watched Corporal Who lead the perfectly silent unicorns. “No I’m not!” – glancing from side to side she noticed the whole company was staring at her, staff sergeant included – “He looks good in uniform, alright?” she finally explained defeatedly. Noticing their volume getting a little out of control, Staff Sergeant Buckshot snapped across them before Colonel Hard Candy noticed: “Would you dunder-heads keep it down?” luckily the colonel was entranced by the silent-drills of the unicorn archers. Brute Force softly cleared his throat. “I didn’t actually say anything.” He complained before watching Corporal Who. The unicorns had broken out of the line. They stepped forward, stomped to a halt, then sharply turned in seemingly random directions, then stepped again. Step; stomp; turn; repeat. It was constant, each stomp like the perfectly synchronised ticking of a thousand clocks. They moved as one, but they seemingly picked their own directions. Moving as one, but moving individually. And all the time they were twirling their crossbows in magical telekinetic grips above their heads; throwing the weapons across to each other and neatly pulling them to their sides; before once again resuming the glittering display of twirling crossbows. It was harmony and it was chaos at the exact same time. The princesses smiled at the sight, giving impressed nods and finding themselves entranced by the display. All throughout, Who did not move. It allowed Private Brute Force to easily spot the rank tabs affixed to the shoulders of the human’s armour. “Are those ‘corporal’ rank-tabs?” the private asked. Steel Block nodded. “He studied his butt off. He deserves ‘em.” Brute Force scoffed. “He’s not even a unicorn!” Mercury smiled at that comment. “And even still he’s more useful than you are, Brute.” “Oh, shut up. You’re just infatuated with him.” Brute Force grumbled. “Hey, don’t call me things I don’t know the meaning of.” The mare snorted angrily. The complicated marching patterns of the unicorns finally ended when they smoothly formed their line facing the princesses once more. When they were in position and standing to rapt attention, Who moved out. The human stepped forward, walking gingerly in front of the unicorns, but at the same time marching with an unrelenting purpose. His head was turned sideways to inspect each and every unicorn in his squad as he walked by them. Out of nowhere, seemingly for no reason, a unicorn jerked ever so slightly. The motion was impossible to mistake among the other unicorns who seemed to be carved out of grey marble. It happened just as Who stepped past her. And as she jerked, the telekinetic grip on the crossbow held by her side seemed to intensify. With a single throw, the crossbow was launched into the air, letting it arc neatly above Who’s head. The corporal stopped in his tracks and reached up with one arm, catching the crossbow before if flew out of range. The telekinetic grip had faded on the weapon as Who carefully stepped back to the unicorn mare and turned to face her. Turning the weapon over, he rigidly inspected every string, bolt and mechanism before twisting it to his side. Holding the crossbow by the front he set the butt on the stone beside his feet with a distinct tchock before lifting the weapon up again. Pausing he suddenly set the weapon down again. Only this time the rest of the unicorns slammed the butts of their weapons on the ground. This time there was a thunderous tchock that filled the whole arena. Lifting his crossbow up, he twirled it around before catching it by the stock and throwing it back to the original owner. The unicorn mare caught it out of the air and smoothly let it descend to her side. Once again all the crossbows fell and hit the ground with a synchronous clang at the exact same moment Who turned about face. As one, the whole squad saluted the princesses once more before turning to exit stage right; sent on their way with a smatter of impressed applause. When Corporal Who’s squad joined the side-lined ranks once more, a single pony marched into the square. The captain of the guard was impossible to mistake. Captain Shining Armour clad in the very same neat dress-uniform he was married in trotted before the full might of the Sol Guard gathered before him. Stomping to a ttention he quickly snapped into a salute. That was the signal. The final signal. “Sol Guard!” regiment leaders all bellowed at the same time. “Ten-hut!” As one all the Sol Guard regiments stood to attention. Thousands of hooves stomped the ground as one causing a sharp attentive crack to echo through the air. Neatly the Sol Guard turned about face and prepared to march. “On the left… march!” The sound of marching hooves filled the air as the regiments moved. They all may as well have been clones, moving in the same step. “One-two! One-two!” Regiment leaders chanted so the correct pace was maintained. Except Stonewall Company seemed to drift off-step. Though it was no fault of their own. Of anypony to blame, it was actually Buckshot’s fault. Feeling his jaw drop, Steel Block stared at what the staff sergeant was doing. Buckshot was far off beat. His march was more to the step of marching drums… upbeat marching drums usually followed by some sort of training cadence. And to add to it, the staff sergeant was whistling! “What the hay?” Brute Force mumbled watching the staff sergeant quick step, drumming home the chorus beat before resuming a new verse. “Well?” Buckshot turned his eyes expectantly to his company. “What are you degenerates waiting for? SING!” “Sing?” a private nearby whimpered recognising the beat from one they had practiced in the barracks a few times. “Aww, sarge~!” Private Shadow Prancer complained with a girlish whine unbecoming of his buff physique. “We promised no more prancing and singing.” “Prance, darn it!” Buckshot barked. “Sing you degenerates! Give these ponies a show!!!” The shield-bearers of Stonewall Company didn’t dare disobey. Glancing among themselves and shrugging defeated they quickly matched the staff sergeant’s odd marching patter, quickstepping before drumming out a proud trot. And so, while drumming out the heavy marching beat, they whistled and sang: “I've got the reach and the teeth of a killin’ machine, with a need to bleed you when the light goes green; best believe, I’m in a zone to be; from my yin to my yang to my Yang Tze. Put a grin on my chin, when you come to me; ‘cuz I’ll win, I’m a one-of-a-kind and I’ll bring death to the place you’re about to be; another river of blood runnin’ up to my knees. Forged in a fire lit long ago, stand next to me, you’ll never stand alone. I’m last to leave, but the first to go; princess, make me dead ‘fore you make me old. I feed on the fear of the devil inside of the enemy faces in my sight: aim for the heart, fight with the mind, kill with resolve of arctic ice.” They paused, heavy hoof-beats dominating the stadium before Stonewall Company broke into chorus: “I am a guardspony I’m marching on!” Staff Sergeant Buckshot bellowed out on his lonesome. “I am a guardspony I’m marching on!” the rest of the company echoed. “I am a warrior, this is my song!” Buckshot yelled. And once again the company repeated, ending the chorus – but they weren’t alone. Knowing the lyrics all to well, the rest of the shields regiment following in Stonewall Company’s wake joined in for the end of the chorus, and the verse that followed. “I am a warrior and this is my song! “I bask in the glow of the rising war, lay waste to the ground of an enemy shore; wade through the blood spilled on the floor, and if another one stands I’ll kill some more.” – with the other earth-pony companies joining in their volume was doubled, carrying further across the stadium – “Shield on my shoulder and a fire in me, like a cigarette thrown to gasoline; if death don’t bring you fear I swear you'll fear this marching beat. Come to Tartarus, come to me, deep down in the dark where Tirek be; in the maw with the jaws and the razor teeth, where the brimstone burns and the alicorn weep. Call to your gods if I cross your path and my silhouette hangs like a bloody rag; hope is a moment now long past; the shadow of death is the one I cast.” Sensing the next chorus – and even though they didn’t know all the words – the unicorns regiment leading the earth-ponies joined in haphazardly. “I am a guardspony I’m marching on; I am a warrior and this is my song. “My eyes are steel and my gaze is long;” – ‘I cannot hear you!’ Buckshot bellowed through the chorus encouraging the company to crank up the volume to overpower the guardsponies joining their voices – “I am a warrior and this is my song! “Now I live lean and I mean to inflict the grief and the least of me is still out of your reach. The killing machine’s gonna do the deed, until the river runs dry and my last breath leaves. Chin in the air with a head held high, I’ll stand in the path of the enemy line. Feel no fear; know my pride; for friends and harmony I’ll end your life.” Pegasi screeched overhead in a blur of white and gold turning sharply and curling in a display of precision aerobatics while they joined their voices with the ground based troops before rank by rank the regiments of ponies filed out of the stadium. “I am a guardspony I’m marching on;” – the very foundations of the stadium rattled, but it only served to draw more excited cheers from the ponies who watched – “I am a warrior and this is my song! “My skin is iron and my gaze is long; I am a warrior and this is my song! “When Tirek sees us charge he’ll up and run; I am a warrior and this is my song! “There ain’t a demon I can’t overcome; I am a warrior and this is my song!” Applause exploded across the ranks of the stadium, unlike that offered to even the Wonderbolts. Nothing could quite beat a song. And as they finally filed out of the stadium and out of the sight of the applauding – some even saluting – ponies, Stonewall Company bellowed out one last chorus: “Into the fire I will keep marching on – hoo-ah! I am a shield-bearer and this is my song!”