A voice calls from offstage. “You say you want a towel, Rhy?”
Rhino looks himself over, noting his soaked form while he idly flicks a few drops off a hoof, “Yes, I’d rather not do the rest of the show soaked in chocolate milk that tastes like sweat.” He gives a light sniff. “At least it still smells like chocolate...”
A towel smacks him in the face and starts vigorously rubbing all over him as the thermos was taken from him. As soon as he’s dry, it flies away. Vinyl walks onstage, holding the refilled container in her magical aura. “Here you go, dude. Anything else?”
He takes the thermos gratefully, “No thanks, Vi. I think I’ve actually got the right mindset for this now.” He smiles widely and laughs, “This place is a little crazy, but I have to admit, it is fun.”
She rolls her eyes, smiling playfully. “Yeah, that’s E’s writing, alright.”
He shrugs, still smiling, “Meh, I always say: everyone’s crazy, just in their own way.” He gives himself a once over after the towel assault, noting his fluffed up mane and tail. He swipes a hoof over each once or twice before they lay down, relatively speaking.
She pouts, looking at his mane. “Why did you do that? It was cute the way it was!”
He ruffles his mane and tail, “Oh don’t worry, I like the ‘fluffy look’ I just wanted it all going the same direction.”
She blinks, staring dumbly at him for a moment. “...wow, I must be losing my touch. You didn’t even blush.”
He gets a playful smile, “Maybe you’ll just have to try harder.” He winks at her.
“Oh?” She smirks cheekily, turning sideways and trailing her tail up his side. “How’s this, Rhy?”
The action causes quite the flush and slight stammer, “P-plenty. You win.”
“Good.” She glances down at his flank. “I should leave before something comes up.” She leans close, whispering in his ear. “If you know what I mean.~”
Rhino clears his throat and doesn’t respond as she laughs and saunters off-stage. “Anyways, next up we have...Nightmare Moon? Yeah, sure, why not. Nightmare Moon.”
The dark mare from before enters, staring down at him. “About time. I have plans to tend to.”
The host, thoroughly numbed after everything, replies simply, “Do any of those plans involve dark castles or evil lairs?”
She scowls angrily at him. “Maybe. It also concerns Sombra and Chrysalis. Now shut up and give me the question.”
“As you wish:”
This is for Nightmare Moon, if you had beaten the Doctor in the rap battle, would you have still tried to take over Equestria even after he show you who he really is?
- raybony
“If I had won, he wouldn’t have had the chance. And thank you for reminding me of that, foal.” She gets up and storms out, shoving the smaller alicorn who was entering onto her face as she passes her.
The unicorn stallion immediately gets up and offers his hoof to help the mare up, “Are you alright Princess?”
“Yes.” She gratefully takes the hoof, standing up. She places a hoof on her snout, frowning slightly. “I hope she didn’t break my nose.”
Rhino’s horn lights up for a moment before he speaks, “It’s fine, nerves are a bit agitated so it’ll be sore in about an hour, but other than that there’s no real damage.”
She stares at him in surprise. “That’s some impressive magical knowledge. Most unicorns only know basic telekinesis. That’s a respectable trait.” She walks past him to take her seat, looking curiously at him. “May I ask where you learned it?”
The stallion returns to his own seat as he answers, “The spell is just a tool of my trade. I guess it goes along with my talent in a way, but mostly just now was biological knowledge. Thank you for the complement.”
She shrugs slightly. “I tend to be candid with my statements. I suppose that’s why most ponies prefer to not play co-op games with me.”
Rhino returns the shrug, “Tact is all well and good, but candidness is for getting the truth about your thoughts out quickly, which is sometimes necessary. Speaking of the truth, let’s get to your first question:”
Luna, what is your favorite gaming genre?
- Rhino
She nods a little, smiling softly. “I would say adventure games. The next closest would be co-op first-pony shooters. Generally, though, I play anything with a good story behind it and good controls.”
He nods, “I prefer RPGs but a good story can make any game a must-have. Next:”
Luna: I bet I can merc you in summa dem Video Games you mentioned in yo battle against Celestia. You CANNOT SEE ME! You up for a challenge?
- TPurnell18
The host pauses at the question, “There’s candidness, and then there’s gibberish.”
The Princess of the night is standing up, glaring into the camera. “WE SHALL HAVE THOU KNOW WE’RE THE BEST! THOU SHALL PAY FOR THY INSOLENCE!” With that she teleports away, leaving behind a perplexed unicorn.
“Tartarus hath no fury like a princess scorned, ladies and gentlecolts.” He says, gesturing after the alicorn. “Next up we have Miss Twilight Sparkle!”
The lavender unicorn walks in, smiling calmly at the stallion. “Hello again, Rhino.” She sits herself down, looking inquisitively at him. “Are you feeling alright? Any adverse effects from the trans-dimensional spell?”
He grins, “From the spell? No. From this experience... fairly certain I went at least slightly insane for a moment or two. I’ve learned how to deal with it now though.”
“I don’t blame you for any momentary insanity.” She giggles, nodding a little. “Seeing ponies so similar yet different to the ones you know would likely do that to anypony.”
“Yes...but I feel you need to experience it to fully understand.” He clears his throat. “But, you are here to answer questions, and we can always speak later. So let us get to it:”
What determines a unicorn's magical aura color? One theory is eye color, but your brother proves this is not the case. And with some unicorns it appears the aura color can change given time. What are your theories on this?
- Rhino
“I’m not entirely sure, myself. I believe it’s the color of one’s cutie mark.” She shrugs.
“Hmm, I expected slightly wordier answer.”
She giggles, sticking her tongue out at him. “Not everything that comes out of my mouth is sesquipedalian loquaciousness.”
He chuckles, “True, I suppose that was stereotyping on my part. Next:”
Since one of your friends writes and you are a lover of reading, have you ever considered writing a book yourself? If so, what kind?
- Rhino
“I’ve written a book for a thesis in college.” She waves a hoof dismissively. “It was about how Equus’s flat topology made it necessary to raise and lower the sun and moon with magic. I got a perfect grade.”
“Anything you’ve considered writing? Educational, comedy, adventure, romance?”
“I suppose I haven’t.” She sheepishly smiles, rubbing the back of her neck. “I’d likely use too much technical language to write an enjoyable fictional story. And Spike can attest to my less-than-tactful attempts to teach subjects.”
He nods again, “Both fair points. Any final comments or questions from yourself?”
“I would ask some questions, but they can wait until later.” She glances at the camera. “Some of them might be a bit...personal.”
“Well, feel free to seek me out and ask whatever you wish when this is all done.” He puts a hoof to his chin in thought. “If Vi doesn’t know where I am, ask Ditzy, looks like I’ll be with her tomorrow.”
She smiles, nodding thoughtfully. “I’ll keep that in mind. I hope to talk with you later, Rhino.” Her horn lights up and she teleports out.
“Just had to make a flashy yet efficient exit, didn’t she?” The host chuckles, "Alright everypony, next up we have... Night Flyer!"
The grey pegasus limps on the stage, bandages covering his left eye, wings, left fore hoof and waist. He holds up his good hoof and waves to the camera with a smile, "Hello everypony!"
At the sight of the injured pony, Rhino's eyes widen and he sits forward, "Woah, do you need some help? You look pretty badly hurt."
Night sits down and gently rubs his injured hoof while staring around the stage, "I just got discharged from the hospital, don't worry it's not serious, just some broken bones and a damaged lung"
The host raises a skeptical eyebrow, "As somepony in a medical profession, I can honestly tell you that what you just described is easily serious." He sighs while massaging the bridge of his nose, "But if they let you out, you’re not just going to drop dead, so I'll take it. Feel up to answering a question?"
The pegasus nods, "Sure"
"Here it is:"
Night Flyer: So how did you make those puzzle boxes of yours? They seem to be magically enchanted, seeing as Vi couldn't open them.
- raybony
"Oooh! That's a good one! I have a Unicorn friend in Manehattan that magically makes the parts. Building the box takes about a month or so to make, longer if a certain pony decides to ‘help’. It's also very dangerous if you don't place a gear or tighten a bolt properly, as you can see", Night looks at his injured body "It'll cause a surprisingly big explosion"
"Hmm, would it be possible for me to get one of these boxes?"
Night brightens up at the question "Sure you can get one!" He digs his good hoof into his mane and pulls out a small blue ball. He then throws it onto the ground, causing smoke to flood the stage. As the smoke clears, a small box lands in front of him
Rhino coughs as he clears the smoke with a hoof, "I appreciate it. Was the smoke necessary though?"
"Yes and no, it's a little side project I'm doing"
"Hmm, alright then. So the riddles are on the side correct?"
"Yes, three riddles around the box. This box is a little different though, instead of gears with half the letters on the sides this box is voice activated. Just press the bottom underneath the riddle and say the answer.”
"Excellent..." Rhino chuckles, "Oh I am going to have fun with this... and probably look a little crazy as I talk to it. Thank you very much for the souvenir Mr. Flight, and thank you for being here today. I wish you a speedy recovery."
"Thank yo-" Night interrupts himself by coughing violently, spitting blood on the floor, "I'm going back to the hospital, bye!"
Rhino shakes his head sadly as he looks at the blood. “I did only promise he wouldn’t drop dead.”
“Yeah, that sounds like a good sentiment, at least.” Vinyl steps onto the stage, wearing a gas mask on her face. “I’m wondering whether the hospital really let him out or not.” She turns on a ventilation system above the stage, which starts sucking up the rest of the smoke from the bomb. “Best to remove that stuff before it hurts somepony.” She quickly gets to work cleaning the blood off the floor, using a crimson cloth.
He eyes the rag, “Please tell me that’s a cloth you just happened to grab, and not one you have dedicated to blood stains because of their frequency.”
She looks at him with a bemused expression. “The former, dude. The color’s a coincidence.”
He lets out a small breath, “Oh good, thought I might have to actually be worried.”
“I hear ya.” She walks past him to exit, teasingly brushing her tail along his side once more. “Have fun, dude!~”
He shivers lightly at the touch but manages to fight the flush, “For our next guest, I would like to call Miss Pinchy to the stage.”
A small pink unicorn walks in, her wonder-filled eyes on him. “Hi.”
Looking surprised at the youth of his guest, Rhino speaks kindly, “Well hello little one, how are you today?”
“I’m fine.” She approaches the desk, raising herself up onto it to get a better look at him. “Miss Twilight told me about you. Is it true you can climb up walls?” Her eyes were positively shining with excitement.
He nods as he gets up from his seat, “It is absolutely true. Watch.” He walks over to one of the walls as a slight glow can be seen coming from under his hooves. As he gets to the wall, Rhino simply sets a hoof on it and continues walking straight up the wall like it was flat ground. He continues walking until he is on the ceiling right above his seat. He looks ‘up’ at the foal and smiles, “See?”
“Amazing!” She hops in glee, beaming brightly. “You’re just like a ninja! I want to do that, too!”
The stallion laughs as he walks his way back down and to his seat, “Well, its not exactly an easy spell, but if you have a magic teacher I could try and show them and you how to do it. Don’t expect to go scaling walls at first though, it’s one of those spells that gets better with experience. Ninjas aren’t made overnight you know.”
“Thank you!” She leaps forward and hugs him. “You’re the best!”
He beams as he lightly hugs her back, “Aww, aren’t you a sweet one.” He sets her down on the desk. “So, feel like answering a question or two?”
“Sure!” She nods happily, sitting herself down on the desk. “What’s the question, Mister Rhino?”
“It’s Doctor Rhino, technically, but you can just call me Rhino. The first question is:”
This is for Ruby Pinch, what kind of anime are in Equestria, and which one is your favorite?
- raybony
“Oh, there’s all kind of anime! Adventure, comedy, slice of life, you name it!” She tilts her head, thinking a bit. “As for my favorite? I’d say either ‘Naruto’ or ‘Darker Than Black’. Those are two good series.”
“I’m sure you just got them many more viewers by saying that. Next:”
If you were a ninja, what kind of ninja would you be? What would be your weapon of choice?
- Rhino
“That’s something I’ve thought about for a while, actually.” She smiles brightly, nodding a bit. “I’d like to be a Kage! They’re some of the most powerful ninjas there are!”
Rhino nods approvingly, “Good answer Pinchy. Any more questions for me while you’re up here?”
“Yes. Do you know what this is?” She pulls out a small dagger with a circle at the end of the handle. The pointed blade glints slightly in the light, facing his chest. “It’d be my weapon of choice.”
“That,” he says as he magically moves the dagger so it isn’t pointing at himself or the foal, “would be a kunai. Something I’m very curious as to how you obtained, and I hope you are being careful with.”
“So you are a ninja!” She giggles, nodding happily. “And don’t worry, I’ll be careful! See you later, Rhino!” She grabs the knife in her mouth and runs out, plans running through her head.
Rhino looks after her, “And thus, a mini-ninja is born and I choose to believe that there are no negative repercussions to this fact.”
“Just like her teacher.” Vinyl giggles, popping up behind him.
“Meaning you or somepony else?”
She frowns, laying her head on the desk. “...That actually hurt, dude.”
His ears flatten slightly, “Oh come now, how am I supposed to know who her teacher is?”
“Yeah, I suppose that’s fair.” She sits up, smirking playfully. “I’m not her main teacher, though. That’d be Tavi. Gotcha, didn’t I?” She asks in a sing-song voice.
He nods, but smirks, “Yes, yes you did. But that’s just par for the course for friends of yours huh?”
The white mare taps her chin thoughtfully. “‘Shy doesn’t fight, herself. Other than her, though, that’s an accurate statement.”
“Thus the Fluttershy Exception is proved once again. Shall I continue then, or do you want to smoke bomb your way out?”
“Where’s the fun in that?” With that, she was gone.
A small eye twitch is all that takes away from the chuckle that follows her departure, “Would have preferred a smoke bomb covering that little disappearing act up. I’ll just think of it as teleporting for the sake of my sanity.” He looks back at the camera, “Next up folks, we have Miss Broadway Bound!”
The filly walks in, obviously excited. She sits down. “This is so awesome! I mean, I’ve been in plays and stuff, but this is like a talk show-thingy!”
Rhino chuckles, “That’s exactly what this is. Ready to answers some questions from your fans?”
“Yes! Yes-yes-yes-yes-yes!” She then coughs slightly, “I mean...why, of course!”
He simply smiles, “Definitely an actress. Here we go:”
Broadway: Just how did you manage to sneak from the orphanage in Canterlot and get to E and V's engagement party? Or did I miss something on E's past story?
- raybony
“I actually live in Enigma’s old apartment in Canterlot. I snuck onto the train to Ponyville though!” she smiles innocently.
The host hums to himself, “I’m surprised a pony of your age doesn’t at least have somepony looking after you.”
“Well, the landlord checks on me occasionally! I did live on the streets for a while when I was younger!”
“Here’s hoping that doesn’t happen again. Here’s your next question:”
Broadway: Did you regret eating all of E's ice-cream afterwards? If not from guilt, maybe from something else?
- raybony
She looks sick as she hugs herself. “Definitely! But I felt better after watching... Five... Maybe seven seasons of Supernatural or whatever show was on!”
“Felt a bit like a big ball instead of a pony?”
“Yeah, I thought somepony would find me exploded everywhere!” She flails her forehooves to emphasize her point.
“Glad to see that wasn’t the case, what your fans do if you went and exploded one day?”
“It would be terrible!” she places her left forehoof over her forehead.
Vinyl pops out from behind Broadway’s chair, frowning down at her. “Laying it on a little thick there, aren’t you, Bebe?”
She chuckles nervously. “Ha... Whoops?” she sat up a little straighter.
The unamused mare turns to Rhino, gesturing to the smaller white pony in front of her. “She’s an actress. In fact, the first time she met E, she tried to guilt-trip him into taking her to his home. Fortunately, E saw through that - with the help of a book I gave him - and still let her come with him.”
She lifts her forehooves. “What can ya do? I mean, It wasn’t that fun out there! Wait... So that’s what that book was!”
She stares down at her incredulously. “...dude, it was called ‘Body Language, Sarcasm and You’. What else would it be about?”
“I dunno, at first I thought he was some random nerd carrying books around all the time!”
“Hey. He’s my nerd.” She giggles, playfully patting her head.
Broadway hugs Vinyl. “And you’re my favorite DJ!”
“Not sure if acting or serious.” She shrugs, walking off behind Rhino. “I choose to believe the latter.”
The host sits back up from where he had been leaning back watching the two converse, “Well then little starlet. Thank you for coming on today.”
“Thank you for having me!” she smiles before trotting off.
Rhino turns towards the camera, “Next up, everypony please welcome... Lyrical!”
“Yo!” A light brown, hoody-wearing unicorn says, entering and promptly taking a seat. “What up, everypony?”
“Excited to be here then?”
“Yezzir.” Lyrical says with a nod. “Nice to meet you too, Rhino.” Lyrical looks around and spots Vinyl. “What’s up, you!”
She grins, waving a hoof at him. “Hey, dude! How’s it going with Gilda?” She winks at him, smirking playfully.
Lyrical stays silent for a moment, then smiles. “Next question!”
Rhino smirks as well, “Second verse, same as the first:”
Lyrical: So have you and G manage to make amends? And G, try not to hurt him too much...when alone~
- raybony
“...Really? Celestia dammit. You would ask that question, Ray.” Lyrical says softly, looking around for Ray. “Well...aside from our first meeting, which was when she tried to claw...talon? Talon my eyes out, we’ve been on good terms.”
“Lyr’, we both know that’s not what Ray meant.” She leans against the wall, her forelegs crossed in slight disappointment. “Now would you kindly answer the question properly?”
Lyrical sighs in defeat. “Fine...We’ve been...going out. Ya happy?”
“Very.” She giggles, sticking her tongue out at him. “Glad I remembered that interesting code phrase.”
Rhino looks back at Vinyl, confused, “Did I miss something in that exchange?”
“You would do that.” The brown stallion said, coldly.
“Hey.” The disk jockey frowns, pointing a hoof at him. “Enough of that. Or would you prefer me to make you do something embarrassing? Like, I don’t know, remove your hoodie?”
The host mutters under his breath, “Dun dun dun.”
“...No. Even if it’s 89 degrees on a hot summer day, I will not remove my awesome black hoodie.” The black and white maned stallion said.
Vinyl smirks, taking a few steps closer to him. “Would. You. Kindly?”
“Nope.” Lyrical said, not doing a thing. “But...would you kindly step two steps back?”
“It doesn’t work on me, dude. Now,” she grins, mere inches from his face now. “would you kindly take off your hoodie?”
“I hate mind control-” Was all Lyrical could say before he finally removed his hoodie, showing a large white t shirt.
Rhino sits back, still observing, “Do I need to get you two a room, considering how much you want his clothes off?”
“Nah. I just felt like-” She stops mid-sentence, noticing the shirt. “...are you bucking kidding me?”
“...Nah.”
Vinyl rolls her eyes. “Fine. At least my love doesn’t wrestle me for dominance every time we’re in bed. Speaking of...” She points behind him, smirking in triumph.
Before Lyrical can react, a large brown griffon swoops in and carries him offstage.
“Well, that was fun. Good luck with the rest of the questions, Rhy!” She leaves the stage in the same direction as the couple before had, whistling a few bars to a song.
In the distance, a stallion can be heard screaming, “MY BODY IS READYYYYYYYY.”
The stallion shrugs, “Ah well. It looks like next we are going to have a special guest via the screen behind me, everypony please welcome Prince Blueblood!” He rotates in his seat as the screen slowly drops down the wall.
“Ah! ‘ello! So good to see you again. In prison.” The prince in an orange suit is chained to a concrete wall.
Vinyl pokes her head in behind Rhino, frowning slightly. “Not sure I feel the same. Of course, I promised E I’d give you the benefit of the doubt.” She glances at the background behind the high-class stallion. “...who’s the griffon?”
“Oh! That is my girlfriend, Trixie Gemini Sanderson! She’s a griffon! And apparently, my new lawyer.”
Said griffon clears her throat, a small blush on her cheeks. “I have to ask you to refrain from calling me your girlfriend until after the trial. They’d dismiss me if there was a personal bias, you see.”
“Fair enough, fair enough. Alright, good news! Vinyl hasn’t closed the chat yet! This is already going well! So! I heard that you had some questions for me?” The prince gets back on topic.
“Right.” Rhino taps the cards to straighten them, “Here we are:”
Blueblood: Do you have any idea who was controlling you? Also, do you have any harsh feelings towards E still? Or even V?
- raybony
“Not in the bucking slightest. All I remember is a dat- night with Gem, blacking out and waking up in a police van enroute to the Ponyville City Penitentiary. Not even my strangest night, for real, for real.”
“As for the second questions, welp, no. I have never, in all my years, held the slightest hatred towards Miss Mystere, nor Vinyl. And while Enigma treats me with slight disdain, Vinyl hates my guts. Still opened the chat, though.” The prince gives a small laugh. “Speaking of which, she never told me why she hates me so much. I chalked it up to magic.”
Rhino gestures towards the DJ, “Care to share, Vi?”
“E told me what happened during your first meeting.” She rubs the back of her head, grimacing a little. “I guess I became outraged at the thought.”
The prince grips his hoof onto his chin. “Hmm. That’s odd. Can’t really- what did happen that time?”
“You attempted to...take advantage of him.”
“One, her. Two, small question. Where was this exactly? If it’s where I think it was, then I’ll laugh out loud. Well, no. Because that’s not very funny. Hmm...” Blueblood trails off with a thoughtful look.
“It happened in a park. After you followed him out of my club in Canterlot.” She sighs, rubbing the side of her head. “...why am I even saying this? You may not have been in control of yourself, but the device that was controlling you would’ve let you know what was going on.”
“True, true. If I was being controlled, there would be no excuse. But here’s the funny thing. You said it was after leaving a club? Vinyl,” Blueblood chuckles, “did it ever occur to you that perhaps I was drunk off my hooves that night? Because, I tell you what. Prince Blueblood Soluna would never, in sane mind nor body, try to touch a mare who does not want to be touched. I swear it.”
She gives him a bemused look. “You said you knew E was a stallion, and preferred it that way.”
“You can’t mean Miss Mystere! Oh, now I KNOW I was drunk that night! I am so, so, sorry! And I’m not even gay!” Blueblood paces as best as he can, with him being chained and all.
“You also had that fake mole on your face that hid the mind-control device.”
“And what, pray tell, would me raping Enigma gain for my controllers? I mean, at least with the scenario the police told me, I could have drugged her and then captured her somewhere. But unless they were super horny and had very strange fetishes, that doesn’t make any sense.”
Vinyl opens her mouth to speak, but comes up short. “...I literally have no response to that train of thought. And I think we’re wasting the audience’s time, now.”
Blueblood gives a large smile. “Yes. I guess you’re right. My train of thought is strange but let’s leave that to another day. Anyway, guys, glad we can have a civil conversation for once. You know, without Vinyl hoofing me in the kiwis. Again. See you when I get out!”
“When you get out?” The normally quiet griffon glances up.
“Yes. Because not only can we use this feed as evidence to my innocence, I trust you with all my heart.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Of course. Besides, if we do fail, get the judge to give the death penalty.”
“What-WHY?!”
“Just trust me on that one.” Blueblood gives the griffon a ‘I-know-something-you-don’t’ smirk. “This is Blueblood Soluna, signing off!” And with that, the feed ends.
As the screen rises back up, Rhino turns to Vinyl, “Well, that happened.”
“Yeah, it did.” She stays quiet for a little bit before tapping his nose with a hoof. “Boop!” She runs off, giggling childishly.
“Glad to see her back to her normal self.” He rubs his nose a bit. “Next up, we have the duo of Snips and Snails!”
The duo walk in, sitting themselves down dutifully. They sit there silently.
Vinyl pokes her head in from offstage behind Rhino. “What’s going on here? You two are never that well-behaved.”
The taller one speaks up. “We were told to not misbehave.”
She narrows her eyes, wondering at the validity of that statement. Eventually, she points her hoof at her eyes then at them, slowly retreating backstage.
Rhino flips through the cards as he remarks, “Careful boys, you never know which ponies are ninjas,” he gets up from his seat only to disappear and reappear behind them with the barest hint of horn flare, “watching you.” He teleports back to his seat, “But if you aren’t misbehaving, then I think they’ll have nothing but good things to say about you. So, want to answer a question?”
“Sure.” Snails grins, completely oblivious to the stallion’s words. In contrast, his friend was shivering slightly. Before Rhino can say anything, though, he speaks up again, noticing something odd. “Mister, do you know there’s a squirrel in your mane?”
The green unicorn looks upwards as he raises a hoof to his mane. He feels a slight shifting of weight on his head just before a small black squirrel hops out of his mane and onto the desk. Rhino smiles as he sees the little pet, “Specter? I didn’t know you came here with me. Were you really up there this whole time?”
The squirrel only nods before his owner nuzzles him. Specter makes his way back onto Rhino’s head, but this time not burying himself in the mane, instead he simply lays down and looks at the guests with his little golden eyes.
Rhino turns to the colts as well, “Thank you for pointing him out to me Snails, I guess I’m just used to the weight of him being up there.”
“You’re welcome.” He smiles once more before a thought occurs to him. “Hey, didn’t you flatten your mane a while back? What did that do to him?”
Rhino shrugs, “If I had to guess, I’d say he probably saw the cloud before I did, jumped out, and jumped back in once I stopped messing with my mane when it was dried. With everything else happening today, I’m not surprised nopony noticed my little buddy. Ain’t that right, Specs?”
The squirrel nods.
Snips speaks up, starting to get impatient. “I thought you had a question for us?” He tries not to be rude, he really does, but it comes across as that.
Rhino ignores the rudeness, sometimes things just come out that way after all, “Right, got distracted. Ahem:”
Question for Snips and Snails: how did you two get your hooves on the Millenium Puzzle in the first place?
- Quillflare
“Oh, I know this!” Snails grins, raising a hoof. “My grandpa got it from a pyramid he explored back in Zebrica. Said something was supposed to happen if I finished it.” He grimaces a bit, looking up in thought. “I never could...hey, why are there hoofprints on the ceiling?”
The host answers frankly, “Because they don’t clean the ceiling enough, meaning the dust gets easily disturbed.”
“Oh.” He stands up, walking out. “Maybe I should get something for Spoon. Her birthday’s coming up soon...”
Snips rolls his eyes, groaning a bit as he follows his friend. “Why are you so interested in her? She used to make fun of you!” Their conversation soon goes out of earshot.
Rhino takes a sip from his thermos as he watches the retreating colts, “I’ll admit, I don’t know what to say about that interview. They were well-behaved though.” He rolls his eyes upward to his mane, “Any comments from you, Specs?”
Said squirrel pops his head down in front of his owner’s eyes to shake his head.
“Oh, that reminds me!” Vinyl pops back in once more, a small headset in her magical grasp. “Have him try this on. It should allow him to communicate with us.” She holds it out to him, beaming brightly.
The stallion’s eyes widen, “Really?” He grabs the tiny headset with his magic and passes it up to Specter.
A few tiny movements later and a voice comes from Specter’s direction, “Testing, testing, one two three. I am fuzzy.”
Rhino smiles widely at his little friend, “Glad to have you with us Specs,” he turns to Vinyl. “mind if he co-hosts?”
“Not a problem.” She giggles, winking a bit. “I find his voice quite amusing. Didn’t expect a squirrel to have a diabetes-causing cute voice.” She trots off, humming a tune to herself.
Specter meets Rhino’s eye, “I like her, she’s funny.”
The unicorn nods, “That she is.” He turns an eye upward, “You want to announce the next one Specs?”
“Sure!” The squirrel straightens up and puffs out his chest, “Would Mr. Moonfeather please come to the stage?”
Moonfeather slowly walks into the room. “Was that a squirrel?” He raises an eyebrow. “You know what? I’m not gonna question anything anymore.” He holds his hooves up in surrender before taking a seat in front of Rhino. “What’s up, colt?”
Rhino nods at the other stallion, “Oh, you know, having a crazy day.”
“Crazy? How so?” He looks around, rubbing the back of his neck. “Uh... may I have some water, or tea, or something?”
The host calls backstage, “Hey Vi, can we get some hydration up here please?”
The white unicorn walks onstage, a bottle of clear liquid in her magical aura. She tosses it to the guest, smiling politely. “Here you go, dude.”
Moonfeather catches the bottle with ease. “Thanks, Vinyl!”
Specter amuses himself by gliding down from Rhino’s head onto the desk. Once there, he asks, “So, was that actually thirst, or was it stage fright?”
“W-well, both. Thirst, yeah, but stage fright due to another one of the guys in here,” he knocks a hoof on the side of his head. “I swear to Luna, they’re so annoying... And they don’t pay rent, either!”
Vinyl giggles, rolling her eyes. “I bet that he just wanted to see my face or something. Touching, but a little awkward.”
Rhino gives the stallion an appraising look, “Ah, I see. Did one of them want to answer questions, or are you the one who will?”
Moonfeather blushes at Vinyl. “H-hey! I can’t help the horny ones!” He blinked. “... Just forget I said that, please.” He buries his face under his hooves. He looks back up at Rhino. “Well, it’s not like I can help it when another just pops on in. How many questions did I get, anyways? Who knows, I might have to humor you.”
She stares at him blankly, unamused. “...what.”
Moonfeather shrugs, a deep blush on his face. “It’s the truth, Vi! Man, they really need to make a medicine for this... Seriously.”
She walks off the stage, shaking her head. “...that stallion has issues...and they don’t come in mylar bags...”
The unicorn host coughs lightly, “Moving on then. You received a single question:”
Moonfeather: So how have things gone with Applejack? Did she return the feelings? And if not, what will you do if Rainbow wins the rap battle?
- raybony
Moonfeather sighs, looking at the table. “I... uh... well, I haven’t really... asked yet. I think one of the guys might pop in, and Celestia knows how she’d react. Ugh... Damn it!” He rests his head on the table again. “Don’t get me wrong, I seriously want to ask her. I do. I’d like to have what Vinyl and Enigma get to have. But I don’t think I’ll ever come close to that. What those two have... that’s a really special bond right there, maybe even stronger than the Elements themselves.” His eye twitches. “But whatever! If I’m gonna die alone, I need to have some fun! Maybe rob a store or two. Crash a party. Ruin a wedding. Oh, the possibilities!” He starts to laugh maniacally. “Oh crap.”
A kunai flies through the air, hitting him in the head with its blunt end.
Moonfeather’s eyes widen. “D-damn... that... Pinchy.” He rubs the already growing bump. “This... this is why I never want to have kids.” He throws the kunai through the window angrily.
Vinyl pops up behind him, placing her forelegs on his head. “Then maybe you shouldn’t go for AJ. She’ll probably want some foals, dude.” She idly flicks his horn as she talks.
Moonfeather sighs. “Vinyl, I thought you knew more than anyone that love means sacrifice and compromise. And- GAH!” He lets out a gasp as he feels his horn flicked. “Y-you’re teasing me on purpose, aren’t you?”
“Not really. I just mess with the nearest pony when I’m bored.” She taps the tip of his horn, thinking a bit. “Why is your horn sharper than most unicorns’, dude?”
“Actually... my adoptive parents always wanted to avoid the topic, but I ran into a certain lavender unicorn. She thinks I’m descended from Royalty, which is why my horn’s like that. That, or I come from some Neanderthal tribe that combats only with horns, supposedly having disappeared many Millennia ago. Was it... I think it was something like ‘Sparta’ or something. They were quite fond of kicking ponies into holes. And.. you do know what touching a unicorn horn like that is for. Ever since your engagement party, you’ve been doing things like that, you sly unicorn. I’m starting to think you want me to be more than just a friend,” he teases.
“Keep dreaming.” She gave it a harsh flick. “I may tease, but my heart belongs to E.”
“Well, you-I-tried. Wow. I can’t believe they can be so perverted! I swear, it’s not me doing this!” He closes his eyes, fighting the ‘happiness’ coursing from his horn, which, due to its sharpness, is more sensitive than other horns.
“Uh huh.” She moves off of him, a little weirded out. “I’m starting to think you’re a masochist. That would’ve hurt other unicorns. Or at least stung.”
“Hey, it’s both, really. But I think you’d know that,” he sticks his tongue out.
Rhino raises his voice slightly, “Ok, I think I’m gonna draw the line there. Thank you for being with us here today Moonfeather.””
Moonfeather shrugs. “Well, I guess everypony gets to have their five minutes of fame. I’m gonna try to find the courage to talk to Applejack... See ya, everypony.” He gets up from the chair, taking one last drink before walking backstage, waving a hoof as he went.
She watches the unicorn leave, frowning slightly. “...I swear, I wonder what the buck’s wrong with that guy...”
Rhino looks at her curiously, “He didn’t seem that bad to me, a bit scatter-brained perhaps, but we all tend to be guilty of that at some point or another. Besides, the way you were hanging all over him I would think you two had known each other long enough for you to be used to it.”
She shrugs slightly, draping herself over the chair. “When I’m bored, I drape myself over furniture and mess with the closest pony.” Her horn lights up, and a quill starts poking the green pony in the back of the head.
“So it appears.” He levitates a quill from one of the desk drawers up to Specter. “If you wouldn’t mind, Specs?”
“My pleasure.” Specter takes the proffered quill and starts fencing the DJ’s own feather away from his perch.
The floating feather stops poking the unicorn and instead moves to start a playful bout with the little creature. Vinyl watches this whole scene with a small smile on her face.
“Aye, now that be a squirrel skilled with a sword. Ye’d always be welcome.” With that, a black unicorn with batwings appears on stage. Oddly enough, he is wearing a suit to match his eyepatch and pegleg.
The host addresses the newcomer, ignoring the continuing duel on his head, “Captain Jolly Roger, I presume?”
“Aye, the one an’ only! Somepony told me there be a question for me?”
“That there is cap’n-” He finally acknowledges the scuffle going on and flicks his eyes between the squirrel and mare, “Could you two stop for a moment while we have a guest?”
“No. This is actually fun.” The quill accidentally jabs the host’s horn. “Sorry.”
“It be alright. Ye get used to it. I be talking between fights all the time.”
Rhino grumbles, “Aye, I suppose ye would. To the question then:”
Captain Jolly Roger: Mind telling us how did you manage to get a pirate ship to land in Ponyville? Seeing as there are no ports, or better still, any oceans near it.
- raybony
“Oh, that be an interesting one. But it be quite simple really. Ye see, there be a nice little lake in the Everfree forest, where the ponies of Ponyville built a little, hidden port. Now getting there be a lot harder. But fortunately, the ‘Golden Pegasus’ has a few Crewmembers with wings: A few pegasi, two griffins and a teenage dragon. With the help of a lot o’ rope, we could just fly there.”
The other stallion asks, “Have ye ever considered turning yer ship into a zepplin? Sky piratin’ seems like it’d be a bit more accessible to larger areas.”
“I did, actually. But then the problems occured to me:
-Most ships in Equestria are zeppelins. That means the Sky-Pirates are pretty common, leading to the valuable ships travelling on the sea. Most Sky-Pirates don’t know that, and so me and me crew can get a lot more booty.
-Also, have ye ever thought what would happen if we shot down a vessel in the sky? All the treasure would be lost. And if we were shot out of th’ sky, we’d be dead.”
Rhino nods, “Fair enough. Alright then Cap’n, thank ye very much for being-”
The quill jabs his horn once more, this time on purpose. “Dude, he still has another question.”
“Hmm?” He flips through his cards, “No, this is the only one with his name on it.”
“He has to answer the one for Shiny.” She moves over and points at the card in question. “The honorable Captain’s busy getting ready to interrogate Blueblood.”
“HEY!”
She jumps in surprise, quickly turning to the bat-winged stallion. “What?”
“I may be a pirate, and some o’ the stuff I said in me life may have been exaggerated a bit, but I still stick to me Code o’ honor. I spent enough time on one ship with Armor t’know that he would act honorable on the outside, but as soon as he thinks he’s unwatched, he starts threatening war-prisoners like dirt.”
“Hey.” She scowls, stomping over and poking him in the chest. “That’s my cousin you’re talking about. I’d appreciate you not dragging his name through the mud, Roger.”
“I’d love to, but I only be telling what I saw with me own eye. I can stop, though.” He says, seeing Vinyl reach towards her V-Rifle.
Rhino cautions her, “Careful Vi, don’t start too many fights at once now.” Right as he finishes saying that, Vi’s quill flies over and smacks her in the head as Specter gives a victory cry.
She flails her forelegs, having not expected that. She runs off the stage, knocking the desk and the hosts behind it over in the process.
Specter’s voice is heard from the pile, “I call foul!”
The pirate curses lightly, “Dammit! I gotta apologize t’her. I might have gone a little too far.”
The fallen host groans as he picks himself up and starts to right the desk. “While I don’t think it would hurt to do that, she should be fine if ye decide not to. She just got spooked I think.”
“Still. Honor Code be Honor Code. Here, Article 13: Never make a lass cry without apologizing.”
A bit flies through the air, beaning the pirate in the forehead. “Not crying!”
“I guess it counts towards angerin them too?”
The black pony rubs his snow-white forehead. “Aye, but that be fer own safety reasons. What’s the question?”
“Right,” Rhino finishes tidying up and locates the chained cards, “here we are:”
Shining Armor: Just how did you meet the Great Captain Jolly Roger? And what is your history with him?
- raybony
“Ah, that be easy: Ye see, I actually come from a family of Navy captains, and even though I got the pirate mark early in life, I still tried to take after me granddad and one half of me dad. When I had worked me up the ranks, I got to be Captain of me own ship. Shining Armor came on board as a private, and I gave him work. But, that lad did not fall on his head. He figured out the meaning behind me initials, I had used them to sign everything, and started spyin’ on me. He watched me take off me coat in my cabin and pulled it down when me superiors came by t’check on me. And ye can’t expect to stay in the navy with a pirate-cutie-mark and being Discord’s grandson.”
“Ya don’t say?” Vinyl coughs offstage, sheepishly smiling. “Sorry, couldn’t resist.”
“And thus began yer rivalry?”
“Aye. I mean, ye also would want revenge on the stallion who is responsible fer them takin’ away everything: Yer job, yer honor, ye lass. Didn’t want to live with a pirate...”
The last item in the list causes Rhino’s ears to flick, “Aye, perhaps it’s best it was out of the way early, doesn’t make it any easier though.” He shakes his head quickly, “Ah, but enough of that talk. Hopefully I’m right this time when I say it was great having ye with us today Cap’n.”
“Yeah, that’s his last question.” She walks onstage, holding a hoof out to him. “Have a nice day, Captain Roger.”
“Aye, It was great being here, too.” He goes towards Vinyl “Sorry. I didn’t know he was yer cousin. Have a nice day, too, Vinyl!” With that, he leaves the stage.
“I should go check on...something. See ya soon, Rhy!~” She rushes off, a small smirk on her lips.
The host consults the cards as he rolls his tongue around in his mouth to get rid of any remaining pirate accent. “Alright Specter we have a couple coming in next, everypony please welcome Lady Rarity and Sir Soarin!”
The couple walk in, both of them looking at the co-hosts in curiosity. The mare speaks up for the both of them. “I must say, darling, you have a magnificent accent. Why, it almost sounds like mine.”
Rhino bows slightly to the mare, “Why thank you. It is an honor to be considered as well spoken as yourself.”
She blushes a bit while her coltfriend frowns at the other stallion. “I’m glad to hear that. Well, we should move onto the questions before Soarin’ gets too jealous, wouldn’t you agree?”
The host nods, “Indeed.”
As Rhino flips to the couple’s questions, Specter speaks up while looking at Soarin, “You know, he was only being polite. There’s no need to be mad at him, he’s already spoken for anyway!”
The pegasus sighs, lowering his head. “I know. I guess I’m just a little protective of Rarity.” He leans over, gently nuzzling her. She nuzzles him back, smiling softly.
Rhino smiles at the display of affection, “No need to explain that to me. There is nothing wrong with being protective, you have to protect what is most important to you after all.” He reaches up and scratches Specter lightly with a hoof as he says this. “Shall we get to the questions then? First:”
(to Soarin) According to rap 23 you fucked Spitfire, have you done any other mares in Equestria?
- Glistening_Spark
Specter speaks up again, “What does that word between ‘you’ and ‘Spitfire’ mean?”
Rhino coughs lightly as he flips the card over, “Nothing you need to worry about until I explain it to you when you’re older.”
“Uh.” Soarin’ looks at his marefriend, who nods reassuringly at him. “...well, I’ve been with five mares in my life before Rarity...and, uh, one griffon.”
The unicorn host doesn’t react to the answer, “Very well, next:”
This is for Soarin and Rarity, why did you too decided to date each other, and how did it all start. And try to keep it simple Rarity, I know how you can get with romance.
- raybony
“Oh, we met when I attended the Wonderbolts Derby. I was brought back into the locker area by Fancy Pants, and, to be quite honest, I fell in love with him at first sight.” She blushes brightly, leaning against him. “We’ve been together since.”
Rhino gestures to the pegasus, “Anything to add?”
He shakes his head. “Nothing important. I’m certain it happened exactly like she described.”
The unicorn stallion nods, “Well, I wish both of you nothing but the best and hope things go just as smoothly from now on. Last one:”
Soarin': No question for you. Just here to say you are not a nice guy... in the "good" way.
- TPurnell18
Specter tilts his head to one side, “I don’t get it.”
The pegasus shrugs. “Neither do I. Maybe it had to do with the Sailor Mouth I was displaying during my rap battle?” He gets up, offering a hoof to the white unicorn. “We should go. Rarity and I have a reservation at a restaurant in a few minutes.” They begin to leave, waving their goodbyes to the hosts.
The two wave back to the exiting couple. After a moment Specter asks, “You know, I like their story about how they got together, but I think I like your’s and Fluttershy’s more.”
Rhino grimaces in response, “Personally I think I would have preferred the ‘love at first sight’ story.”
“Why?” Vinyl pops up next to him, smirking playfully. “Those Phoenix Flake things not romantic enough?”
Rhino smirks but is still a bit quiet, “That was just Shy and I’s first extended interaction, we didn’t get together because of that.”
“Hey, it was the first hint of any feelings you had for her.” She shrugs. “And it was funny when it got into your eyes.”
Rhino shrugs, still not smiling, “Yeah, in hindsight I suppose it is, but suffice to say there’s a reason I tell that story instead of the one that got us together.” He grunts as he takes a long swig of milk.
“Makes sense. At least you were able to see your crush while talking to them.” She glances at the next card, grimacing slightly. “Yikes. No way that everypony is answering that one. I’ll just answer it.” She moves over to the chairs, sitting down and looking expectantly at him.
The stallion twitches his ear to get his pet’s attention, “You want to take this one? I need a moment.” He takes another drink and stares off in thought.
Specter jumps onto the desk to grab the card, “Alright:”
This is for everyone, what is your opinion about settling arguments with rap battles instead of talking it out?
- raybony
“Here’s the thing.” Vinyl shifts in her seat, leaning forward. “Rap battles allow everypony to get every bit of frustration at a pony out at once. It’s a therapeutic thing, see?”
Rhino, out of his little funk, remarks, “Frankly, I’m just surprised everypony can rap. I don’t think I could string four lines together.”
“Hey, we live in a universe where almost everypony can break out into song at a moment’s notice. I’m surprised that anypony can’t rap.” She laughs, playfully patting his shoulder.
“Meh, maybe I overthink it.”
A feminine pegasus rushes in, anxiety on his face. “I’m not late, am I?”
Rhino raises an eyebrow, “Mister Enigma right? Actually you’re right on time, the next set of questions were for you.”
Specter peeks at the cards, “The set after that are for him and Vinyl, so... what? Is she gonna leave and come back in 5 minutes?”
“Nah, I’m good. I’ll just stay here for now.” She leans back in her seat, watching them both in partial interest.
The burgundy stallion sits down, still breathing heavily, trying to calm his hammering heart down. “Sorry, I was taking care of something in the Everfree and...” He looks down at his mythril-clad forehooves, blushing slightly. “...okay, fine, I was practicing with the Bass Drops.”
“I take it those are related to Vi’s gun then?” Rhino says, gesturing to the mare.
“Yep. I made the Bass Drops, the Rewind and the V-Rifle.” She grins, pushing her shades up her nose. “I also made a Dubstep Sword I call the Smooth Rhythm. All of them are freakin’ awesome.”
Specter looks at the mare, “What, all weapons, no armor?”
“Oh, I’ve made a few harnesses as well, but that’s mostly for games. Besides, the Rewind is more than enough armor for Enigma.” She giggles, tapping the pony’s head. “He’s ridiculously durable. I once threw a bomb in his face and all he got was a cut on his forehead.”
Vinyl pauses, a thought coming to her head. “In fact, I bet he could beat you in a fight.” She grins so widely they both could see all of her teeth.
Rhino simply looks at her, “I don’t really fight without a good reason, and that tends to be a short list.”
She frowns, slouching down in her seat. “...you’re no fun, you know that?”
He shrugs, “Sorry, I have been known to be a buzzkill for that kind of thing. Besides, do you really want to see your fiance hurt?”
The white mare quirks an eyebrow at him. “Are you kidding? We fought once during a game, and he freaking beat me. There’s no way he’d lose.”
Enigma speaks up, sheepishly smiling. “Vi, I think you misunderstood his question.” He clears his throat, turning towards Rhino. “I apologize for that. She gets rather competitive.”
Rhino waves it off, “No problem, anyone who knows Rainbow Dash knows how to deal with that type. To her credit though, I am a bit surprised she lost, she seems like she’d be tenacious enough to keep beating you until you stayed down, but then again, I suppose it depends on the type of fight.”
She sighs, lowering her head. “He knocked my lives down to zero, causing my harness to lock up my skeletal muscles.”
Specter mutters, “Huh?”
Rhino looks at the couple, “I’m starting to think you and I have different definitions of the word ‘fight.’ It sounds like you two were sparring more than anything else.”
“Trust me, I was going after him like a Timberwolf after its prey.” She shrugs, shaking her head. “I was extremely enraged at the time.”
The unicorn stallion nods while his eyes glass over a moment, “Yes, its amazing how hard one will fight if they get angry enough.”
A gray mare pokes her head onto the set, frowning slightly. “Please get a move on. The audience is starting to get annoyed by the lack of questions.” With that said, she pops back out.
Specter goes through the cards before passing them to Rhino, remarking, “Technically there were questions, just none of the viewer’s ones.”
The stallion pats his buddy, “Yes, but those are the ones they came to see. Now then:”
How come in ERBOP (Lol, probably spelled it wrong) Enigma used his "Pinkie Sense" to tell when somepony called him a girl (recently, not throughout the entire book).
- NINJA-PON3
“Oh, that.” He shrugs. “It’s something I found out about myself awhile back. If I sneeze twice in a row, then somepony I can’t see has just called me a mare.” He clenches his teeth, taking a deep calming breath. “Not a mare.”
Vinyl rolls her eyes, turning to the co-hosts. “He gets mistaken for a mare quite often due to his appearance. You know, smaller frame, feminine voice - not kidding, it sounds like Dashie’s - rounded snout and noticeable eyelashes.” She points out the characteristics as she mentions them. “I’m surprised you didn’t mistake him for a mare, before.”
Rhino shrugs, “Well, I knew his name and you kept referring to the pony of that name as a ‘he’ earlier, plus his question cards have his gender on them. I guess that would be why. I can understand why some would think he is a mare at first glance though, just as I can understand why this would be something he hates.” He takes another glance at Enigma, “I would suggest growing a beard like I can, but somehow I feel that would just draw more odd glances.”
The pegasus scrunches up his snout, frowning. “I tried that once. I looked rather stupid with any long facial hair.”
“I guess some can pull it off, some can’t. Not too sure what you can do though, besides correct them.” He shrugs again, “Ah well, next question:”
What is the best part about being with Vinyl?
- Rhino
“Where to begin?” He chuckles, wrapping a wing around her. “I’ve known her ever since she answered a letter of mine. I didn’t even expect it to make it to her.” He shrugs a bit. “The best part, though, is feeling like I have a purpose. She’s the reason I’m here.” He nuzzles her cheek, feeling the heat coming from it. “It’s also nice to see her cute blush.”
Rhino smiles as he props his head up with a hoof, “Awww.” He chuckles as he flips through the few cards remaining, “Here we go:”
What is your favorite thing about music?
- Rhino
“My favorite thing about music?” He taps his chin, thinking a little. “I suppose I like how it conveys emotion. Whether through a ballad or a masterfully-written composition, I enjoy music that causes me to feel something.”
The other stallion nods, “Agreed. I feel something can also be said for the music that you can simply become engrossed in so much so that you just stop thinking for awhile, and simply ...are. No worries, just you and the music.”
Vinyl nods, giggling softly. “I feel you both. That’s what I try to do with my own music. I try to weave a metaphorical story into them - one that you don’t hear, but instead feel, see in your mind’s eye. Y’know what I mean.”
Rhino doesn’t answer as he simply stares into space. Specter leans over and snaps his fingers a few times to get his attention, “Hey, no zoning out to your head music right now.”
The green pony shakes himself out of it, “Right right, sorry. Next question:”
Enigma: I see that you really care for your friend Broadway. But have you ever thought of being more than just a friend to her? Maybe even a dad?
- raybony
He blinks, surprised by the question. “...I never considered that, no.” He shrugs, sheepish. “I’m not sure I could be a father to her. I have trouble disciplining fillies and colts.”
Rhino raises an eyebrow. “Is that really all that’s stopping you?”
He frowns slightly, thinking a little harder. “I have trouble taking care of myself. I barely get myself up in the morning - and that is only so I don’t upset my love.”
Vinyl glances away, slightly uncomfortable at this.
Specter huffs, “Well that sucks. I would think it would be good for both you and her.” He shrugs, “But, I guess maybe you aren’t quite ready.”
His owner simply hums in thought. “Let’s just move on shall we:”
I'm kinda confused. You said the last section would explain why Enigma was acting like he did. How was he acting again? And why was BlueBlood trying to kill him?..Or will that be answered in the Q&A?
Sorry for missing all this...It's been a long night...
- Brony Leader
“I can answer that.” Vinyl giggles, pushing playfully on her pegasus. “E here might get mad at being called a mare, but he’ll never blatantly attack a pony because of it. Not unless he’s in the middle of a fight already, I mean. Also, that needle was full of a specialized love poison. It wouldn’t have killed him, just made him fall for that upstuck noble ass.” She turns to the side, sheepishly smiling. “No offense.”
The donkey there nods, smiling genially. “None taken.”
Rhino looks slightly alarmed, “Really? Sounds like he really was a sicko.”
She sighs, shaking her head. “Not so. As it turns out, he was being mind-controlled. It was almost foal-proof - we’d never have caught it if somepony hadn’t knocked the device off his royal face.”
Specter shakes his head, “Why does it always have to be complicated? Why can’t the pony just be a sicko, you beat the tar out of them, then not feel guilty about it since they deserved it?”
Rhino speaks frankly, “Or you just don’t have the entire situation to begin with.”
“True, but we have to give them the benefit of the doubt.” She gets up, about to leave. “Well, I suppose that’s everything. Thank you for being here with us, Rhy.”
The green unicorn raises a hoof, “Umm, actually, there’s two more questions. They’re for both you and E.”
“Oh?” She promptly plops her plot back down, curious. “What would they be?”
“Ahem:”
How does "Keep Calm and Flutter On" and "Magical Mystery Cure" affect this story and its canon? That scene I'm thinking about makes me believe that something very odd is going on.
- SuperChaosKG
“Oh, that one’s easy.” Vinyl waved a hoof dismissively, giggling a bit. “The events of this story assume that the show stops before the Season Three Finale.” She taps her chin, thinking about that for a moment. “Strike that, we just assume that Twi never became an alicorn. That makes more sense. As for Discord, he just went too long without causing chaos. The Princesses put him in the sun as a punishment, but that’s more akin to a time-out than anything else.”
Enigma stares at her blankly. “...Twi became an alicorn? What are you talking about? The last time I checked, she didn’t have wings...”
“Alternate universe stuff, I would assume. Last question:”
E and Vinyl: I hope you know that unless somepony's smart enough to realize it, that ‘A’ word's gonna be on a lot of minds until you speak up... right?
- TPurnell18
The couple blush brightly, at a loss for words. They lean towards each other, whispering softly to each other.
Eventually, the white mare speaks up, her cheeks burning with embarrassment. “...Um...I don’t think I’ll be able to mention the word and allow this story to keep a ‘teen’ rating...”
Rhino holds up both hooves, “No need to elaborate, message received.”
She sighs in relief, leaning against her love. “That’s good. What we do in the bedroom should be private anyways.” She looks up at the other unicorn, a playful smirk on her lips. “Don’t you agree?~”
The stallion avoids her eyes as he points in a random direction, “Oh look, a change of subject!”
She frowns at him, an eyebrow quirked. “I’m not falling for that a third time, dude.”
Enigma points out the window. “Oh, look, a Changeling.”
Vinyl was gone, crashing through the window. “I’MA CRUSH THAT INSECT! WHERE THE BUCK IS IT?!”
He looks at the green stallion, shrugging a bit. “She hates Changelings, if it wasn’t obvious.”
Specter just looks at the window, “As the squirrel here, I’m gonna go out on a limb and say it was obvious.”
Rhino turns back to Enigma, “So what happens now? To both the show and me I suppose.”
“Well, you can stay here as long as you like. The show will probably be ending soon enough.” He gets up, holding out a hoof. “And hey, you can keep the headset if you don’t think it’ll freak ponies out in your universe.” He looks at the window, thinking a bit. “...strike that, Vi might need it later on.”
The squirrel secures the headset further on his head, “So I can keep this until we leave for home or until Vinyl needs it?”
Rhino nods. “As for how long we’ll be staying, I guess Twilight has some say in this, but I don’t personally see the harm in staying for at least a little bit.”
“Until you leave for home, and I think Twi will be fine with you staying a bit.” He turns to the pony behind the camera. “You can end the broadcast now.”
With that, the program fades to black.