//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: June 20, The Mare in the Moon // Story: Yet Another Human In Equestria Story // by Bardic_Knowledge //------------------------------// Yet Another Human in Equestria Story By: Bardic Knowledge Chapter 1: June 20, The Mare in the Moon I awoke on the floor of Pinkie's room as she bounced around the room, gathering supplies. As soon as she noticed that I was awake, she zipped over to me, getting right in my face. “You were right!” she practically shouted. “I was just walking along the road and I saw this purple unicorn with a baby dragon next to her and when she said 'hi' I realized she was new in town and if she was new in town she didn't have any friends and then I remembered that you said that Twilight would be here today and I realized that that was probably her and so she would need friends and I was just getting my party supplies and invitations together to invite the rest of my friends to the library where she can meet them and become friends with us!” I blinked repeatedly in the wake of her breathless tirade and smiled shakily. “So, I take it that you've got the party planned properly?” “Nice alliteration! Normally, I do the whole thing myself, but since you're here, I can pass out the invitations while you can set up the party!” “I don't know, Pinkie. I'm not much of a party person, remember? How about you give me a route to pass out invites along, and I'll take care of that while you set things up? If you just met Twilight, then she's probably at Sweet Apple Acres right now, or soon enough.” “Ooh, you know her schedule for the day?” “Sort of. After meeting you the first time, she goes to Applejack's and gets persuaded by Apple Bloom's cuteness to stay for lunch. After that, she runs into Rainbow Dash, or rather, Dash runs into her, and they talk for all of a half-minute, if that. Then she goes to meet Rarity at the Town Hall, before being dragged to the Boutique for a quick make-over. Then she tries to talk to Fluttershy about her bird choir, but doesn't get much more than squeaks until Spike shows up. They end their journey at the library.” “So she'll be there even if I don't give her an invite?” “Right.” “Okie dokie lokie!” She turned her head over her shoulder and when she turned back there was a map in her mouth. She didn't even have her saddlebags on yet, she just pulled the map out of thick air. I reached forward and took the map, a green line already outlined along a path of buildings. She then grabbed her saddlebags, already full of supplies, and pulled out a page of sheet music. “Know how to sing?” “Music runs in the family. Dad's even got his own local-area band with two of his buddies: '3 Husbands on the Loose.' My sight-reading's a bit rusty, but I'm sure it's just like falling off a bicycle.” Pinkie's head cocked ninety degrees. I chuckled. “As a bit of a joke, I purposely mangle common sayings. I also tend to purPUSely put the emPHAsis on the wrong syLAble.” Pinkie giggled and skipped off, going to prepare the library for Twilight's Welcome Party/Summer Sun's Eve Party. I took a moment to read over the music, finding a miniature keyboard in Pinkie's room to find the key. After a few repetitions to make sure I had the funny little melody down, I headed out to the first house on the circuit. I knocked on the door, and the first pony I greeted was Lyra. I began singing in bass as soon she opened the door. o/` This invitation's from Pinkie Pie, from her to me to you/ We're having a party for the new mare in town, a wonderful to-do/ If you stick around long enough we'll see something new/ For tomorrow's the Summer Sun Celebration, the thousandth one, it's true!/ So stop by the library and join us all in cheering with a great whoo-hoo~!o/` I bowed at the end of the song, and she applauded in that pony way of stomping her hooves on the ground. As soon as she promised to be there, and to pass along the message, I waved to her and went on to the next house. After the first five houses, I needed to take a break and get a drink of water before I could continue singing. Maybe I should introduce Pinkie to the idea of written invitations early. After resting my voice and legs for a few minutes, I started in on the other fifteen houses. The line ended at the the words “These ponies are good at spreading the word. We'll have plenty of party-goers to make up for you, so join us at the library when you're done!” Another two hours or so later, I had delivered the message to all the houses on the map, and saw a few of those I had passed by already spreading the news. Walking for almost two hours and singing at regular intervals had tired me out pretty well, but I was still able to get to the library easily enough. As I arrived, I saw Pinkie firing off her party cannon at the table in the centre of the room. A shower of confetti scattered across the floor as a tablecloth not only landed on the table, but spread itself around the unicorn totem centerpiece without disturbing it. She pulled out a ball of streamers and turned to stuff it into the cannon when I spoke up. “How do you always manage to break physics like that?” She looked at me, confused for a moment, before I gestured at the tablecloth. She giggled at that before firing the cannon at the ceiling, spreading the streamers across the room. “I'll do anything for my friends,” she smiled. “Even if they hardly know me. Sometimes, ponies tell me that what I do is impossible, but if it was impossible, how could I do it?” I smiled back at her. Pinkie didn't not know something was impossible, she just refused to believe that something was impossible if her friends needed her to do it. “So, need a hand with the set-up?” I said, holding out my hands. “Nah. Actually, you could help me grab the food when I'm done here. I could get it all myself, but one trip would be better than two or three.” “Thanks.” I moved off to the side as Pinkie continued making the library party-friendly and pulled out a book entitled “Petriculture: The Growing of Stone.” Oddly appropriate considering my company. It was interesting stuff, actually. Despite being called “rock farms,” they were more like jewel farms. Most of the stones were actually geodes of one kind or another, and depending on the quality of the farm (the Pie farm was actually listed as one of the highest quality), the jewels from the geodes could be used in anything from basic jewelry and decoration to magical foci and specially enchanted amulets. I was only halfway into the book when Pinkie tapped me on the shoulder. “I've been trying to get your attention for a few minutes now,” she said, head cocked. “Sorry, when I get into a book I sometimes tune out the world around me. That actually got me in trouble once at school.” We headed out the door and walked to Sugarcube Corner, where we gathered a few boxes of cupcakes, some drinks, and some condiments. I had, in fact, tried the hot-sauce-cupcake thing at my party the night before, and it wasn't bad. The sweet and spice created an interesting dichotomy and the baked goods of Sugercube Corner were excellent on their own. Not long after we finished setting up, the ponies started filtering in through the door, Pinkie greeting each one by name as they arrived. I wish I had anywhere near as good a memory for practically anything as she did for names. I browsed the shelves again and grabbed a book on weather management this time before sitting down. While reading this book, I made sure I was only half-paying attention to it, so that I could keep track of the party. It was a bit annoying, because I wound up losing my spot on the page repeatedly as something happened nearby that would draw my attention. Eventually, the stream of ponies seemed to stop (though there was the occasional straggler), and Pinkie let everyone know that this was going to be a surprise party. After no one further arrived at the library, Pinkie gestured and everypony who was standing near a light put it out. It wasn't dark enough that I couldn't keep reading, but I shelved the book and knelt beside one of the ponies whose names I didn't catch, so as to stay out of sight. There was a thump outside. “Aw, wook at that! He's so sweepy he can't even keep his wittwe bawance!” Twilight cooed. “Poor thing. We simply must get him to bed!” Fluttershy replied, before flying into the library. Immediately after, Twilight popped in and took Spike from her before pushing her out the door. “We'll get right on that. Well, good night!” In the dim light, I saw Pinkie seem to flicker and disappear, before popping back up in a different spot with Fluttershy beside her. “Rude much?” Spike muttered. “Sorry, Spike, but I have to convince the Princess that Nightmare Moon is coming and we're running out of time. I just need to be alone so that I can study without a bunch of crazy ponies trying to make friends all the time.” She certainly failed her Spot Check. “Now, where's the lights?” And with that, the lights came back on and everyone cried out “Surprise!” I stood up as I said it, but my attempts to get Twilight's attention were stymied by Pinkie popping up in her face. “Surprise! Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie, and I threw this party just for you! Were you surprised? Were ya? Huh huh huh?” “Very surprised. Libraries are supposed to be quiet.” Twilight complained. “That's silly. What kind of welcome party would this be if it were quiet?” “Well, for one, it'd be easier to chat,” I commented, approaching them. “But it'd be so boring!” Pinkie replied. Twilight, however, backed up a few steps. “What are you?” she gasped. “I'm a human, and Pinkie's friend. Name's Joe. How're you enjoying Ponyville?” “Uh, well-” “Joe's only been here a day and he already feels at home! I threw him his party last night.” Pinkie interrupted. “I-” “I mean when I saw you walking into town and you said 'hi' and I realized Joe was right and you were here, but since you were new in town, you didn't have any friends here and that made me so sad and that's when I had an idea, and that's why I went *GASP*. I'd just throw a super-duper spectacular welcome party and invite everyone in Ponyville!” As Pinkie ran her mouth, Twilight walked over to the refreshments table and began pouring herself a goblet of hot sauce. Just as canon. “And now you have lots and lots of friends!” Pinkie cheered. Twilight flinched at the proclamation before turning around with a reddened face and tears forming in her eyes. “Are you okay, sugarcube?” asked Applejack. I jumped a little, since I didn't see her coming. Though I should have remembered that everyone gathered around as she drank that. Just before she jumped away, I spoke up. “Milk helps with spicy foods.” But my advice fell on deaf ears as she ran upstairs. “Aw, she's so happy she's crying.” “Not quite, Pinkie. Some people can't handle spicy foods.” I said, as Spike examined the bottle of hot sauce. Pinkie used the bottle on a cupcake while I grabbed another cupcake and dipped it in Twilight's abandoned goblet. We munched on the cupcakes to everyone else's odd looks as I explained. “For instance, my Aunt Linda would make some chili that Gramma said was really spicy, but it'd taste really mild to me.” “How can you eat that?” asked Rainbow Dash, confused. “Like this.” I replied, opening my mouth and taking a bite. Pinkie giggled. “It's good, really!” Dash looked dubious, but decided to take our word for it. As I ate an apple fritter, which was amazing, I had a thought. “Hey, AJ. Do you think your family could use some hands with any harvests? I could help out with some of the lifting of the apple baskets.” “Well, we ain't doin' a big harvest again fer some time, but there's always some dead fall to be found and picked up. Ya sure you wanna work at the farm?” “Well, physical labour isn't exactly my strong point, but hopefully, I'd be able to get used to it. Living in Ponyville's bound to make me fitter in any case.” “So yer stickin' around?” “Well, since I don't know how I got to Ponyville, I don't have much choice at this point.” “How can you not know how you got here?” asked Dash. “I thought you said you know the future or something.” “It's a bit of an odd tale, and I promise on my honour that I will explain all of it tomorrow, when the Princesses are present.” “Princesses?” asked Applejack. “Whoops. May want to hold onto that bit of info for now. If you'll excuse me, I want to find Spike. Dragons are awesome.” And with that I wound my way through the crowd to find Spike talking with Fluttershy some more. I joined in on the conversation, and learned that Fluttershy already knew that Twilight was just being silly with the whole Spike-is-sleepy-thing at the front door when she got in. We chatted for a few minutes before I got bored with that and Spike's lack of draconic knowledge. After wandering around, I did my usual thing and grabbed a book to read before sitting down in a corner. Instead of something new, I grabbed the weather management book again, as I hadn't gotten near as far in that as I had the Petriculture book. After a few pages, a pillow set down beside me covered in a blue glow, which vanished as Rarity sat down, a napkin dabbing at her muzzle. “I see you're enjoying the party,” she said sardonically. “I'm like this at most parties,” I said, continuing to read. “I barely know anyone here, even you guys, so I don't have much related material to talk about yet. And there aren't really any games to play.” Rarity gestured over to another wall, where a group of ponies were playing Pin The Tail On The Pony. I sighed. “Yeah, that's not really a game to me. I mean something like the card game Apples to Apples, or Fluxx, or the board game King of Tokyo.” “You did mention that your father owned over nine hundred games?” “Yeah. Of course, a few of those were ones he invented, but still. Heck, Monopoly has its flaws, but I'd still like to play it.” “So how do you celebrate your birthdays if you don't like parties like this?” “Typically, I invite my few close friends over for an afternoon or something and then we sit around watching movies or playing video games.” At this point, I set the book aside. “You mentioned these video games before. Are they anything like the arcade cabinets in town?” “Arcade games are the precursor to video games, but most of the games I played were known as RPGs, or Role Playing Games, since they tell a story and there's a challenge to them. Sometimes, while playing board games, I'd invent a reason behind what I was doing on my turn. Shadows, I'm such a geek.” Rarity giggled, “Well, you did say your cutie mark would be a book.” I smiled. “Yeah. And that's actually something I'm curious about. Your cutie mark is a trio of gems, but your career is in fashion that doesn't always use jewelry. How does that work?” “Well, your talent is stories, but, from what you've said, you're good with mathematics. And you worked customer service in multiple places.” “Ugh. I only worked at McDonald's for three years because I couldn't get another job. A misanthrope in customer service is not a good combination.” “Misanthrope?” “Mm, right. Words formed by thought. Basically it means someone who doesn't like humans. 'Anthro' meaning human, and 'mis' meaning something negative. A misogynist is someone who doesn't like women, and a misandrist would be someone who doesn't like men. If it was an actual word, that is.” “I know you said you had in interest in language, but I didn't realize it was that in-depth.” “I don't do much more than read and play games. Linguistics is something I read about.” “I think we've gotten off topic.” “Huh?” I blinked and thought back. “I guess so.” “In any case, the moral of the conversation is that while our talents are our specialty, it's not everything we are. My cutie mark is gems because I'm good at making ponies shine, mostly through clothing. Even you aren't defined by books, despite them being a guiding force in your life.” “Heh. If I had my Fullmetal hoodie, I'd have to move your pin up the sleeve a few places.” She frowned. “I still don't care for the fact that you rank us like that. Do you do that with your human friends?” “Kinda, yeah. I have four best friends out of all of my friends, and amongst them I have two I call my brother in some way, and between them, Frank is the one I refer to as my best-of-best-friends. Then again, I'm an odd person.” I glanced up as Rarity and I kept talking, just in time to watch Spike and Pinkie start dancing around with lampshades on their heads, other ponies laughing and dancing along. It didn't even seem to matter that Twilight had ducked out, they were still having fun. Eventually, Spike went up the stairs to ask Twilight to come down, and Pinkie was over by her favourite game. I glanced at the moon, a window thankfully nearby. It wouldn't be long 'til moondown. My how time flies. The sky was already glowing slightly brighter, and the stars were slowly approaching the moon. Rarity looked closely at me. “Anything wrong?” “Aside from the sun coming up, not really. It's almost time.” She put her hoof on my knee. It wasn't as hard as I would have thought. It was like having someone else's knee touching mine. “Let's go.” I stood up and stretched as Rarity did the same. We walked to the town hall, with ponies that hadn't been at the party joining us on the way, including Big Mac, Apple Bloom, and some of the other Apple Clan with food for the celebration. Rarity met up with her parents and Sweetie Belle and she introduced me. Sweetie was very interested in what I was and how I knew Rarity. As it turns out, Rarity's dad was actually named Magnum Fantastic, and he had a doctorate in forensic science, even though his passion was sports. I waved to them as I mingled with some of the others in the crowd, watching Fluttershy fly in through a window with her bird choir and Rarity moved to the upper balcony. I stepped beside Twilight after Pinkie nattered on about how exited she was, then Twilight and I both looked up at the moon and stars as the Mayor began her speech. “It's almost time,” I commented. “Let's just hope it's only an old pony tale.” she muttered, before doing a double-take. “You...?” “Brave heart, Twilight Sparkle. On this morning, you must let your friends be your guide.” As soon as her attention was stolen by the vanishing Mare in the Moon, I ducked back into the crowd, Pinkie following after me. “What was that about?” she whispered. The Mayor was still talking. “Just having a bit of fun, I suppose. But really, you and the others need to stick with her. She is lonely, but she doesn't quite realize it. All she's had is her family, Spike, the Princess, and her studies.” I closed my eyes. “...Princess Celestia!” announced the Mayor, and Fluttershy's birds started singing. Rarity pulled the rope that opened the curtains to reveal nothing. As the crowd murmured, I heard Twilight say, “This can't be good.” “Be calm everypony, there must be a reasonable explanation!” The Mayor said. “Ooh! I love guessing games! Is she hiding?” Pinkie hopped in place. “Not quite, Pi-” “She's gone!” said Rarity, returning from backstage. Every pony in the room gasped as Twilight and Pinkie both turned to stare at me. I then pointed at the balcony where Nightmare Moon was making her appearance. “Oh, my beloved subjects,” purred the Nightmare. “It's been so long since I've seen your precious, sun-loving faces.” “What did you do with our Princess?!” shouted Rainbow Dash. But before she could assault the dark alicorn her tail was grabbed by Applejack. Nightmare Moon chuckled. “Why? Am I not royal enough for you? Don't you know who I am?” I was tempted to speak up, but I didn't want to draw too much attention to myself. I did keep Pinkie quiet as she was about to call Nightmare Moon “Black Snooty.” Applejack looked at me gratefully. “Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years?” she glared menacingly at Fluttershy and I was very tempted to yell at her. “Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs?” “I did!” shouted Twilight. “And I know who you are. You're the Mare in the Moon. Nightmare Moon!” The crowd gasped. “Well, well, well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why I'm here.” Finally, I decided to make my presence known. “Eternal night,” I said. I stepped forward and stood beside Twilight. “I'm not for sunlight, myself, but eternal night is a bad for frost, trees, crops, and tides.” “What?!” she shouted. “Without the sun, cold would take the world. And what I hate more than the pain sunlight brings, is cold.” “I don't care what you think,” Nightmare Moon growled. “Remember this day, my little ponies, for it will be your last. From this moment forth, the night will last FOREVER!” Then she began cackling, punctuated with lightning. My eyes narrowed at her as Twilight stared on in horror.