//------------------------------// // Meet the Engineer // Story: Pony Fortress 2 // by Bahamut Omega //------------------------------// Applejack whistled a tune as she set down her wrench and sat down in front of her campfire with a bottle of good cider. "Somethin wrong?" she asked of her companions. She was escorting Jet Set and Upper Crust back to their estate in Canterlot. They had come to her for such an escort because the train tracks from Ponyville to Canterlot were damaged and the area in between was bandit territory. For a hefty sum of bits, Applejack had agreed, and now they were camped out in a forest clearing, with the upper class couple being on edge compared to the relaxed Applejack. "How can you be so relaxed?" Jet Set asked as the tripod mounted device next to the campfire turned and shot someone in the dark, getting a scream. "Look buddy. I'm an engineer. Which means Ah solve problems," Applejack said. "Well then, what is beauty?" Upper Crust asked, cringing as another bandit was gunned down. "Ah don't solve problems like that," Applejack said. "That falls in the purview of yer conundrums of philosophy. Better question for Rarity if ya ask me." Another bandit was gunned down as the farmmare took a swig of cider. "Ah solve practical problems. Fer example: how am I gonna stop some big, mean motherhubberd from tearing me a new behind?" Another turret, this one with dual machine guns rather than the smaller semiautomatic one, turned and blasted several bandits. "The answer: use a gun." "And if that doesn't work?" Jet Set asked in a bit of nervousness from the screams. In answer to his question, a third turret, this one with a rocket launcher mounted on the top along with the machine guns, turned and fired its rockets at a group of bandits. "If that don't work, use more gun," Applejack said with a grin as an explosion went off and lit up a part of the woods. "MY LEGGGGG!!!" a bandit screamed as said limb landed in front of Applejack, drawing the semiautomatic turret's attention. "Like this high caliber, tripod mounted little number," Applejack said. "Designed by me. Built by me," a quick buck sent the leg flying, where the semiautomatic turret shot it down. "And you'd best hope... not pointed at you," she said in a bit of an ominous tone as the bandits tried bum rushing them, only to be cut down one after another by the turrets. "Ah... music to mah ears." Jet Set and Upper Crust on the other hoof, were trembling in new found fear of their escort. A country mare she might have been, but this unassuming looking apple farmer was dangerous. Some more bandits got cut down by machine gun fire. Though not from the turrets. Another couple got blasted with rockets not from a turret, and yet another got hit in the head with a single well placed bullet. "Well I'll be. Who knew Ah'd find you three in these parts?" Applejack asked with a grin as Twilight, Spike, and Big Macintosh came into the light of the campfire. "Are you... Twilight Sparkle?!" Upper Crust asked. She had never expected to find Twilight Sparkle of all ponies wearing an outfit more suited to hunting than research, and carrying a sniper rifle that looked quite menacing despite looking to have been made from random items in one of those flea markets she'd heard about. "Indeed I am," Twilight said as she sat down. "The dragon is my assistant Spike." "Hi," Spike said as he affectionately rubbed his rocket launcher. "And the stallion is Applejack's brother Big Macintosh," Twilight said. "Eeyup," Big Mac said as he looked over his machine gun. "Got yourself a new gun, Twi?" Applejack asked. "Yup. I call it the Bazaar Bargain," Twilight said. "Enchanted to become more powerful with successive headshots." Jet Set and Upper Crust could only sit in silence as they wondered what kind of ponies they were in the presence of.