Lost
This is terrible. Horrible in fact. Nothing had managed to hit home to me the power I had until today. As soon as I saw the oozing red blood seeping out of the body I knew this had become serious. The group I was representing was serious--and I'm not sure anymore whether I can do this.
Everypony gets hurt around me. It's all my fault. It's all my fault and there's nothing I can do. Not long ago I was a sane pony and now, look at me. I'm nothing but the shadow of the mare I once was. If the younger version of me could see me now she'd be terrified; not just of what she was going to become, but of herself. Could she be systematically destroying everything she had ever cared about without even knowing she was doing so? Oh no, I knew what I'd been doing. And yet I'd done nothing to stop it. I was an idiot. Blinded like a little foal.
My cause had been so strong that I ignored the sense runninng through my head. The police were so desparate for this to end-- for the rebellion to be torn down, but they just didn't understand. They didn't understand us, and neither do I. We work so hard to destroy things-- and why? To bring peace? That's what they always say in our meetings. That we're there to save everypony, not to be rid of everything good in this world. But we were going about it the wrong way... and I can't believe I've only just noticed that.
I had been so cynical, simply because of how scared I was about being alone. Maybe my anger was only there because I felt so afraid. My friends had left me for a new life, but I hadn't wanted that. I didn't want to lose them like I'd lost every other pony in my life. And now my life- seemed a waste. Death scares me so much; only because I've felt like I'd lost everything. I felt like, in order to make things right, they're had to be a new order. Yes, maybe we do need some changes in Equestria, but this? Nopony needs this.
And it's all my fault.
Twelve killings and all because of me and my actions. This has to have an end... and I know what it'll be. The ending's coming soon, I can feel it. I just wish somepony was here with me, to help me. The little filly's gone. She's gone and all because I'd been too foalish to recognise when she'd really needed my help. Her Father had been an idiot-- but I'd done much worse for the cause.
I can't imagine how bad her parents must feel now. Her Mother-- losing her husband to the dungeons, and now her daughter to a death caused by somepony who she saw as a saviour-- not a killer. And that's just what I am, a killer. A killer with murderous tendencies that I can't ignore.
So many of us would love to kill in cold-blood, yet barely any become dedicated enough to accomplish it. Yet it was managed this time. I can't live with myself. Not here. Not now. I have to stop my team. I have to stop them. Otherwise we'll all be lost forever.
Yes, the ending is near. And it's not going to pretty. There has to be some more deaths-- otherwise this can never stop. The chain just goes on and on without anypony even daring to notice.
Snips, I'm sorry. I should have never thought anything mean about you when you were trying to talk to me and make me feel happy. Twist-- oh Twist-- I was so harsh on you when all you wanted to do was prove that I still had a friend by my side. Cheerile, Big Mac, Rarity, Mrs Cake, Smarty Pants; every one of the dead... I thought you'd failed me as a friend but it was really the other way round. You'd done all you could to make me feel better and I ignored you and started heading off in the wrong direction.
But I can make it all better with this next funeral. The ponies who are truly to blame for my cause: the royals. Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Captain Shining Armour, Princess Twilght-- you'd better be careful and mind your step when you come to Ponyville next week.
And as for you two, Little Belle and Little Bloom, there was somepony stalking you all along to. Revenge is coming my friends. You'd better run-
RUN, RUN, RUN.