The Four and One Erebi Nights
or
The Psychosomatics
Day Four
during which Princess Luna makes coffee.
“Skip that radio and the camera. Teach me cooking.”
“But princess! You have servants for that... and...” the young technician lay his ears along his neck. “I don’t know cooking.”
“But you know the basics, the appliances, don’t you?”
“Umm... yes...?”
“Grinding. Mixing. Frying. Brewing. Straining. Drying. Baking. I have a very special coffee blend to make.”
“Oh, I think I understand... it’s more of alchemy than cooking, isn’t it? I know there’s a university laboratory...”
“No, no, no. Nopony ever wants to drink coffee prepared in a laboratory. Besides, appliances used daily for cooking food are... infused with certain spirit... Try coffee with water from a kettle that boiled water for coffee a thousand times, and from a brand new one...”
“I get it. Magic.” The technician’s look bore sudden respect, recalling the princess is not some cute filly but a truly mighty, ancient magician. “I think I can do some of it... and I can get a cook to teach you the rest.”
They got to work, taking over the palace kitchen, disrupting the work of the royal cooks, and taking over ovens, heaters, blenders, coffee grinders, mixers, all kinds of appliances. Luna was so hungry for knowledge, so obsessed, that the young technician was sweating profusely, as he finished the lesson under the wary eye of the master cook. Meanwhile, the master cook, while ired at the princess’ antics, would not dare to oppose her wish, and would correct the technician whenever he’d make a mistake describing the operation of given appliance.
As they finished, Luna picked a section of the kitchen for her own use, set her chosen ingredients on the big table and began chanting the spell she had worked on the whole morning. She began preparing the blend. She danced and pranced between the pots and appliances, grinding, grating, chopping, mixing, adding, stirring, straining, and chanting all the while.
A few pine needles to add the pining.
A strand of strangler to prevent straining.
Will-o-the-wisp for wistful feeling.
Peels from an orange to feel more appealing.
Freedom from fern grown in the Everfree
Bee honey and sting for honesty.
Shamrock to allow shame to surface.
Ten grains of quicksand to set the pace.
A cone of fir to help fight your fear.
Burnt caramel for the bittersweet tear.
Forget-me-nots for feeling blue.
A bit of clover to give you clue.
A dash of dashing, arousing rose,
Binding of bindweed for staying close,
A clove for love, a hot bit of heather,
A grain of pepper to make you feel better
And coffee so dark to summon the night,
to bear the burden of the mixture’s might.
As Luna finished, putting the mix in the grinder in the end, and running it for a minute on highest speed, the aroma made her eyes fill with tears. That wasn’t the same wonderful blend as her psychosomatic coffee. It was something... different. She had no doubts, it wouldn’t be any more popular than her previous blend. Ponies would be extremely reluctant to try it. Still, trying it once would suffice...
The work occupied her so much that when she peered outside, the Sun was about to dip behind the horizon. She would be late to Ponyville - she had to stay in Canterlot for her evening chores.
She packed the new blend into a coffee can and returned to her room, pondering whether to try it on herself first, or save it for the evening.
No, no experimenting with psychosomatic beverages before raising the Moon. The coffee would have to wait.