//------------------------------//
// Chapter 6 
// Story: Monkeying Around -or- Pulling My Leg 
// by Dirty Bit 
//------------------------------//


Chapter 6


Get this Monkey off My Back!


In the kitchen, Spike quickly jotted down his own version of a distress call to the princess with fear in his eyes. Twilight stood over him protectively, thought held fear of her own "Hurry, Spike! I don't know how long before he actually finds one of us..." She whispered pleadingly.

Spike finished his letter and took a deep breath as he rolled it up"Done. Now all we gotta do is send it and pray it reaches her in time..." He went to spit fire, but he froze with his mouth open as wide as his eyes.

Twilight blinked "Spike, what's wrong?" Following his gaze, she turned to the kitchen's entrance and gasped when she noticed a grinning monkey holding a boomstick.

"Found you! Any last words before I turn you into swiss cheese?" The Monkey King quipped while aiming his gun carefully at Twilight 

Twilight stared before quickly turning to Spike "Senditsenditsendit!!" After Spike blew a stream of fire on the scroll and sent the message out the window, Twilight instantly brought up a shield over her and Spike the moment some bullets were fired, blocking the projectiles as they ricocheted loudly.

The Monkey King scowled "Hey, no fair! There's no sport in protection!" He scoffed until he smiled "Oh well..." His boomstick transformed into a mallet "Sometimes, you gotta crack a few eggs if you wanna make an omelette!" He grinned menacingly as he ran over and whacked the shield.

Twilight grunted in pain as she held up the shield "Spike! You'll have to run! I can't hold this shield up forever!" She grunted again as her barricade was whacked again.

Spike feared the worst from her sister figure suffering at the mercy of a giant monkey. He mustered the courage to reply to her "I-I can't leave you, Twilight! I won't do it!"

Twilight gritted her teeth as her shield was continuously pounded on "This isn't a request, Spike! You need to be safe! I can't bear to visualize what would happen if-GAH!" After one last hit, Twilight's concentration was broken, and her shield had been shattered like a dropped vase. She moaned and rubbed her head, but then opened her eyes to see the Monkey King tower over her and Spike with his mallet prepared.

The Monkey King held his mallet over his head as he grinned "Time to play Whack-a-Pony..." Before he could bring down his weapon, he as knocked forward, prompting Twilight and Spike to move out of the way as his head went through a cabinet door.

Twilight and Spike noticed their savior hovering steaming her nostrils after laying a good hit on the Monkey King "Nopony messes with my friends!" Rainbow Dash snapped as she landed by her friends "Are you two alright?" She asked while the Monkey King tried pulling himself out.

Spike heaved a sigh of relief "We were this close to being smashed into pancakes! Thanks for your help, Rainbow!" He smiled brightly at the cyan pegasus.

Rainbow Dash smiled back "No way am I gonna leave my friends in danger!" She turned to Twilight "Everypony ran outside while the Monkey King wasn't looking! I made sure to come back for you!"

Twilight nodded "At least everypony's safe. Spike managed to send the letter! Now let's hurry out of here!" Twilight, Spike, and Rainbow Dash ran out of the library.

The Monkey King growled when he pulled himself out "I think a certain Rainbow's gonna turn black, blue, and red all over when I'm through with her!" He picked up his staff and ran out of the library in pursuit of the mares, laughing as he went outside.
_____

Princess Celestia was busy enjoying a slice of fine marble cake in the royal kitchen. Nothing was more decadent than the succulent texture of a good cake baked by the finest chefs in Equestria. She wondered if she should consult to order more food from Sugarcube Corner given Pinkie's expertise in baking.

Both her thoughts and meal were cut short when a message was sent to her 'Huh? This is unexpected. I wonder who sent a friendship letter...' Her expectations were shot when she unraveled the scroll and read its contents; It was not a letter on what was learned about friendship, but actually a hastily-written distress call.

Dear Princess Celestia,

Please come and help us! Some weird and magical monkey turned Pinkie Pie into a puppet and is trying to kill us all! Please hurry before we're all done for!

Spike

P.S: Pinkie is a PUPPET!!

Well, there went her idea to request Pinkie to make delicious cakes. The mere thought of a magical monkey sounded ludicrous to her standards, but she still had to bear with a former spirit of chaos and disharmony being reformed after being such a villain. Perhaps she could try and convince this monkey into ignoring his murderous intentions and turn over a new leaf; it worked before, didn't it? She set her decadent slice of cake on the counter and activated her horn to teleport to Ponyville.
_____

Twilight and company gathered in front of Sugarcube Corner "Okay, everypony. The princess should be here soon, so we should try and stall for time if the Monkey King will be hot on our trail!"

Pinkie turned to Twilight "But the Monkey King isn't even hot! In fact, I'm not sure he's even cold." She answered obliviously, earning a facehoof from the others.

Lyra sighed "Leave it to Pinkie to lighten the mood..." She stated with half sincerity as she looked around "We should be more careful, though. The Monkey King could be anywhere!"

Rarity looked down "I just want Princess Celestia to come to Ponyville and resolve this whole issue so the day can be over!"

Applebloom frowned "But what if she don't make it in time? That monkey's so scary!"

Applejack looked down at her sister "Now that's just stinkin' thinkin', Applebloom! We'll be fine so long as we stay outta that varmint's sight!"

"Peek-a-boo!"

The group of mares darted their heads up at the front roof of Sugarcube Corner to see the Monkey King with a large mallet "I see you!!" He held his mallet and prepared to jump.

Twilight jumped at the sight of the Monkey King "Run!" She barked as the group sped off, the Monkey King striking the ground with his mallet. He leaped into a chase after the group of mares.

Rainbow Dash was flying off, then stopped to hover "Wait! Why am I running away?" She asked herself as she looked back at the Monkey King approaching with his hammer. Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes and assumed a midair karate stance "Alright, monkey boy! Bring it on!"

Twilight noticed her friend stopping and skidded to a halt "Rainbow Dash, no!" The other stopped as well and looked back at the cyan pegasus about to fight.

The Monkey King's grin widened "Gladly!" He called out as he leaped into the air with a primal screech. Both of them collided, with hoof meeting stick, and they engaged in combat; Rainbow Dash tapped into her extensive knowledge as a black belt while the Monkey King easily fought back with his staff in its regular form. Rainbow Dash sent her opponent back on the ground with a straight jab to the face, the Monkey King recovering in a flip as he landed on his feet "That's for leading me into a wall, you jerk!"

The Monkey King rubbed his cheek "A mare of payback, huh?" He looked around and noticed he was near a garden with a small metal wire fence. The ancient pranskter grinned and aimed his stick, shooting a magic beam at the fence; It then rose up from the ground and shot up to tightly constrict Rainbow Dash, bringing her down from the air.

While she struggled, the Monkey King's stick transformed into an axe as he advanced towards her "This is for stealing my audience!!" He snapped as he raised the axe over his head and went to bring it down. What managed to stop him was the sound of a quietly raging scream that rose in volume "That voice..." He uttered before his axe changed back into a stick. The Monkey King quickly turned around to deflect a pink blur headed towards him. He flung it away to reveal a certain pink puppet that was out for blood.

...Okay, maybe not blood, but she wasn't happy.

Pinkie stared down the Monkey King "Don't hurt my friend, you meanie!" She barked indignantly.

The Monkey King chuckled "Oh, come off it, girlie! I was just gonna axe her a question!"

Rainbow Dash stopped fussing with her iron bindings to stare blankly at the Monkey King. The rest of the group did the same before Spike finally called out "Boo!"

The Monkey King jerked his head towards the purple dragon "Quiet, you!" He hissed as he turned back to Pinkie "Besides, this isn't your fight!"

If Pinkie could steam from her nostrils, she would "It is now..." She growled as she pawed at the ground. The Monkey King saw this and spun his stick until he gripped it with both paws, taking a stance.

They slowly circled each other while staring each other down as both tension and silence filled the air. The Monkey King finally broke the silence "You are not able to defeat me with your current physical condition!" He spoke in an abrupt mock-foreign accent; His lips moved entirely different from the words that came out of his mouth.

Pinkie scoffed "You underestimate my capability, Monkey King, for I have rose above many a challenge!" She quipped back in the same form of talking, lip movement and all. They squinted their eyes at each other, and then rushed in to close the distance between them and begin their fight.

Suddenly, a bright light expanded from nothingness in between them as they skidded to a halt, drawing both fighters into confusion. There was a bright flash before Princess Celestia appeared between Pinkie and the Monkey King. The ancient prankster looked miffed "Oh, come on! We were gonna start a battle of epic-" He changed his tune "and possibly comical-" He added quickly before going back to his cross tone "proportions!"

Twilight beamed "Princess Celestia! You made it!"

Princess Celestia smiled back at her student "It's good to see you all..." turned her head to gaze upon Pinkie Pie in her puppet state, looking surprised at first glance "I haven't seen something like this in ages!" He turned to face the Monkey King "So you're the one responsible for this?" She asked curiously.

The Monkey King giggled "Well, I wouldn't say I was responsible!" He pointed a finger "That one over there managed to save me from Marionette limbo by pulling my leg!" He paused before he looked away and waved "Literally speaking..."

Celestia nodded "I see...And I take it you do not wish to go back there, correct?"

Monkey King zipped up to Celestia and slapped a graduate hat on her head over her tiara and grinned as he slung an arm over her neck "Correct! She can be taught!" He called out comically to the group. He smacked the hat off of her head and pressed a finger to Celestia's chest with a smirk "So judging by the flashy regalia, you must be the head honcho of this place! Princess...Celery?" He asked.

"Celestia." The solar princess corrected politely "And you must be the evil monkey mentioned in my letter from Spike, if I'm not mistaken." She stated with a thin smile.

"Evil!?" The Monkey King asked in a baffled tone as he inched away from Celestia and pointed a thumb on his chest "Dunno where evil came from, lady, but I happen to be the Maharaja of Monkeyshines! The Monkey King, if you will!" He pointed at Celestia "You got something against comedy?"

Celestia shook her head "Not at all." She replied warmly "In fact, you remind me of somepony who acts just like you."

The Monkey King crossed his arms "Oh? Is he some kind of plagiarist trying to steal my act?" He asked with a small amount of ire. Competitive show-offs was one thing, but he could never tolerate someone stealing his material.

Celestia chuckled at the ancient prankster's tone "Not at all, in fact he's quite different in both appearance and mind." She took a deep breath and held a serious look "I wish to negotiate with you on the events of your behavior and your actions."

The Monkey King tilted his head "Negotiate? What are the terms?" He ask as he placed a free paw on his hip while the other held his staff.

Celestia closed her eyes "From what I've gathered, you must have been put in your wooden prison for a reason. Have your mischievous misadventures gone out of control at some point?"

The ancient prankster screeched and clenched a fist  "There's nothing wrong with a good prank now and then! Are you saying I have a problem?"

Celestia shook her head "No, I do not." She opened her eyes with a frown "But you must have caused a lot of wrongdoing in your time under the excuse of comical reasons to have been locked away as a puppet. Do you not care for the well-being of others?"

The Monkey King scoffed "Of course I do! I also make sure they get a good look at my handiwork, too!" He grinned smugly.

Rainbow Dash glared at the Monkey King "You liar! All you did was cause so much problems in Ponyville, and now you're trying to kill us all!"

The Monkey King waved a paw at Rainbow Dash "Meh, ignore her for a moment. So, while we all love to talk and junk, I'm on a tight schedule! Mind cutting to the chase?" He asked with an arched eyebrow

Celestia nodded "Very well. Monkey King, you're clearly one to express your love for freedom, mischief, and comedy, and your endless supply of magic helps see to that goal. But I urge you hear out my proposal so that I can ensure that your freedom stays intact."

The Monkey King stared before he pulled up a chair out of nowhere and sat down, placing his fingertips together as he stared intently "I'm listening..." He spoke in an intrigued tone.

Celestia smiled "I'm willing to let you enjoy your freedom entirely, so long as you try and use your powers for the greater good."

Rainbow Dash held an incredulous expression "Princess, are you serious!? I don't think the same trick will work twice, especially with this guy!"

Twilight studied how confident Celestia looked and turned to her bound friend "I think she's onto something, Rainbow Dash. Let's watch..." She said as she stared at her mentor and the Monkey King intently.

Celestia continued "If you're willing to ignore the vendetta you have with my little ponies, I'll even grant you a room back at my castle so you can actually feel like a respected king."

The Monkey King stared with awestruck eyes at the thought of his own throne, and stroked his beard with a thoughtful glance "A chance to actually show my status as a king...I like it..." He said in an interested tone.

Lyra frowned "But princess! What about Pinkie? She's still a puppet!"

Celestia held a hoof "I can take care of that easily. All I'm waiting for now is a direct answer from the Monkey King." She stared at the ancient prankster mulling over the proposal "So, what do you say to my offer, Monkey King? Are you willing to reform yourself so you can live a better life?" She asked sincerely with a smile.

The Monkey King stood up from his chair with a blank face as everypony around him waited for an answer "You know...Looking back on it, maybe I haven't had a good audience to marvel at what I do to bring a good amount of laughs. A tickle or two, maybe even a pie to the face, but it isn't enough!" He looked down as he stroked his beard "Perhaps I've been milking the same old thing over and over. I mean, I still have a vendetta with a bunch of people, but I don't even know if they're alive! Which reminds me..." He paused before pulling out a scroll and unraveling it to reveal a picture of two bipedal figures.

One of them was a tall male figure with a blue shirt, beige pants, and brown loafers with black hair. Next to him was a small female child with an orange coat and blue pants; She had black hair as well. The Monkey King pointed a finger to the picture "Know where I can find these two?" He asked politely.

Celestia studied the picture before shaking her head "I'm sorry. For as long as I've lived, I haven't seen a trace of the figures on your picture. I do not think they even exist in Equestria." She said as she bowed her head with a frown.

The Monkey King's eyes shot wide as his jaw dropped to the ground along with his pictures "Y-...You mean...They're..." His pupils trembled as he leaked tears "Gone?" He squeaked feebly as his lip quivered.

Celestia nodded "I'm afraid so, Monkey King...I'm sorry for your loss."

The Monkey King drooped down "Great, now I can't even enjoy a proper revenge to go with my freedom!" He dropped to his knees and brought his fists to the sky "What do I have to live for now!?" He shouted to the heavens.

Celestia smiled hopefully "You shouldn't feel sad. I'd say you have a bright future ahead of you if you're willing to oblige to my offer."

Fluttershy stared at the Monkey King with pity upon seeing him a broken mess "That poor monkey...I think we should give him a second chance..."

Rarity and Applejack turned to Fluttershy with disapproving frowns on their faces "Really?" They spoke simultaneously.

Fluttershy recoiled from their question "W-Well, maybe he's just misunderstood!"

Lyra examined the Monkey King "You know, I'm kind of with Fluttershy on this."

Twilight gave Lyra a deadpan stare "It's because of your love for humans, isn't it?"

Lyra looked away "Maybe..." She muttered as she pawed at the ground innocently.

Celestia stared at the Monkey King as he rose up and brushed himself off "Well? Will you consider my words?"

The Monkey King hummed and looked down in thought "You know, now that the Chans are gone and I'm all alone in a world full of technicolor ponies, maybe it's time for a change after all...Maybe...Maybe I should try and start a new reign as the unrivaled master of mischief and king of all that is monkey...." He scratched his head "Maybe I should accept that some of my pranks have been dry running gags for the longest time..." He stared at his staff "Maybe..." The Monkey King took his staff with both paws.

"Naaaaah~!!"

He directed his staff and shot a magic beam towards the princess, startling everypony, especially Twilight "Princess Celestia!!" She called out in shock.

Celestia only closed her eyes and took a deep breath "Oh well. I tried..." She activated her horn, and her eyes shot open with glowing white light. A golden shield appeared and blocked the magic beam, neutralizing it completely. She then grabbed the Monkey King in a golden aura as he tried to struggle "It saddens me that you had to choose this path, Monkey King. You've wasted a lot of potential as becoming another one of Equestria's greatest icons. You leave me with no choice but to send you back where you belong..."

Her horn shined brightly and fired a magic beam at the Monkey King, and a golden whirlwind surrounded him as he felt himself becoming a puppet again "Nooooooooo!! I was just kidding! Can't you take a joke!?"

Celestia simply replied with "Not today..."

The Monkey King screeched "I'll say it once and I'll say it again: Everyone's a critic~!!!" His voice faded until he was finally reduced to his former puppet form, dropped to the ground as he laid in a ragdoll position.

Pinkie stared until a pink mist appeared around her and swirled into a rapid whirlwind. It then subsided to reveal the party pony back in her original form. After examining herself and gasping in surprise, Pinkie hopped up and down joyfully "Hooray! I'm me again! Princess Celestia saved the day!" She grinned brightly. Pinkie then zoomed up to the solar princess and hugged her "Thank you so much for your help, princess!"

Celestia returned the embrace "Anything to help my subjects!" She replied brightly. She looked down at the puppet in front of her and frowned "We'll have to deal with this one properly."

"Umm...Princess?"

Celestia turned to Fluttershy as she approached her "I was wondering, after seeing the Monkey King like that...Maybe he's just not ready to be good yet."

Lyra turned to Fluttershy "You don't mean..."

Fluttershy nodded "That's right. I still think he deserves another chance. Now just wasn't the time is all. Maybe we can wait until we feel he can change his ways sometime in the future." She looked away "I-If you don't mind that is..."

Celestia stared at Fluttershy before she chuckled "I'd expect no less of a request from the Element of Kindness. Your empathy is to be commended, Fluttershy. I'm willing to leave this puppet in your care until you feel it's necessary to revive and reform him."

Lyra raised a hoof "I can take him in myself, your majesty." She looked down "It's partially my fault he even came around."

Pinkie turned to Lyra "Ponyfeathers!" She sped towards Lyra and hugged her as she smiled "This wasn't your fault, and you know it! I'm the one who bought the puppet and pulled his leg, silly!" Pinkie stared at her friend "What makes this cool is that if we actually DO reform the Monkey King, he'll tell you all about humans, just like you want him to!"

Lyra stared back at Pinkie before she smiled back "Pinkie...You're a real friend, you know that?"

"Hello??"

Lyra and Pinkie turned to Rainbow Dash, who was still tied up "A little help here, please?" The two mares giggled and went to help the cyan pegasus.

Applejack sighed "Ah'm surprised we're even gonna give this ape another chance after all that he's done..."

Rarity shook her head "You and me both, darling..."

Celestia smiled "Well, then I leave it up to you, my little ponies. Hopefully, when the time is right, you'll guide the Monkey King on the right path."

Before Twilight could say anything, a bright flash appeared over the group. They looked up to see a certain draconequus wearing a Haywaian shirt and sunglasses laying back in the air, sipping from a straw in a coconut shell. He stopped sipping to raise his shades and look down at the ponies below him with a smile "Hello there, everypony! Did I miss anything?" He asked with genuine curiousity.

Fluttershy stared up for a moment before she smiled "Discord~..." She and Discord shared a laugh, to which everypony else joined in shortly after. Even if today turned out to be a hectic one of comical proportions, there was nothing like a good laugh between friends.

And to think, the one who brought their laughter was now a puppet once more, waiting for the next chance to come out and have some more fun.


The End