The life of Equestria bustled around normally as Twilight headed down the street to go to Rarity’s Boutique for some reason that Rarity left unexplained. Her thoughts were on Pinkie Pie and her strangness from yesterday, something about us being controlled by other-worldly beings. While Twilight would look into it, as she promised Pinkie, she wouldn’t give it too much thought. After all, what is the possibility of a bunch of unknown creatures sitting around, writing what we say and do?
While Twilight was walking down the road, a portal opened in front of her, and another Twilight came out of it. Now, the real Twilight, remembering what happened last time, needed to listen intently to what she had to say, for she didn’t want any problems like last time.
“Twilight, you need to listen to me!”
“Of course. Talk!”
“I know you are going to think this is crazy, but-”
She was cut off from being tackled by a solid black stallion, who is now holding her down.
“Wow... You are surprisingly strong for your size...” the future Twilight said as Deemo kept her held down.
“Yeah, I get that a lot...” The stallion said. He looked over at Twilight, who is scared shitless right now.
“Who are you?” Twilight barely stammered out.
“It doesn’t matter...” Twilight turned around to see a human. “All you need to know is that this pony here never existed...”
The human was wearing some kind of metallic suit, the only color difference being the small red pane of plexiglass that let him see through.
Without another moment, the black stallion jumps off of the future Twilight and is shot by an arrow to the chest. Electricity shoots out everywhere from the arrow as Future Twilight falls to the ground. Not a single sound was heard from her.
Twilight gasped. “How could you-”
They were gone. It seemed as if as fast as they were there, they were gone within less time.
Twilight runs to the Boutique, which is where she was headed in the first place. She runs inside and sees Rarity sitting on the couch talking to Fluttershy.
“I know, sweetie, but it’s just not natural...”
Fluttershy was squeaking softly, so Twilight could not understand what she was saying.
“Rarity! Fluttershy!”
The two ponies look over at Twilight, who is now running towards them.
“Twilight? What is the matter, dear?” Rarity said, setting down a cup of water in front of Fluttershy.
“I don’t know how to explain this, but I just saw myself get killed...”
Her trail of thought was soon elsewhere. Considering that was her from the future, she realized she was going to be killed! She couldn’t let that happen. But how would she prevent it?
“Hey honey... I didn’t know you were coming here today...”
She turned around and saw her coltfriend, Blazer, standing in the doorway.
“Hey...”
Blazer could tell by the look on her face, and that of Rarity and Fluttershy that something was wrong here...
“What’s going on?” He said as he started walking towards Twilight.
“I just saw myself get killed...”
“How?”
“It was me from the future...”
“Twilight... Time can be rewritten... You’ll be fine...”
Twilight looked up at Blazer, tears starting to swell in her eyes.
“I know... It’s just so stressfull to see something like that...”
“Well, I know a good stress reliever...”
Twilight knew where this was going. She smiled slightly and looked over at her friends.
“I’ll talk to you two later...”
She looked up at her coltfriend, who began walking out of the Boutique. Following suit, Twilight followed Blazer back to the tree house. Upon entering, Blazer noticed Spike was still sleeping in his tiny ass bed. As much as Blazer wanted to pick him and throw his ass into the living room, he didn’t. He lifted his bed with magic, and took it into the living room and set it on the floor.
Walking back up the steps to the room, he saw Twili8ght laying on the bed. Blazer slowly walked up to the bed, and layed down next to her, and he was like, "Yeah..."
Twilight nudged closer to him, resting her head under Blazer’s chin. Blazer, taking no time at all, kissed her head.
“I love you, Twilight...” He said in a quite soothing voice.
“Mmm... I love you too...”
Before they could start, Blazer smells something burning.
“Hey... Do you smell that?” He whispered to Twilight.
“Yeah... I do...”
“It smells like smoke...”
Blazer gets up and goes downstairs. Looking around, he sees Spike lighting curtains on fire with his fire breath.
“Spike, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Blazer said, running down the stairs to try and stop Spike from causing any more damage.
“No! Fuck off, bro...” Spike said as he spit fire at him.
“Spike, what are you doing?” he said, dodging the fire like a fucking boss.
“What does it look like? I’m burning down the library!”
Blazer runs upstairs to Twilight, who jumps out of nowhere and starts beating the shit out of him.
“WHERE IS MY REDBULL?!” She shouted in his face.
“It’s... On the table over there...” He points at the Redbull sitting on the table across the room. Twilight grabs the Redbull with her magic and takes a large drink of it. After wiping her mouth and belching loudly, she sprouts wings and flies out of her window.
“Okay then...” Blazer said. He then walked down the stairs and then proceeded to beat the shit out of Spike.
Blazer then hogtied him up and setting him on the couch, he goes outside, wondering where Twilight has gone off to...
***
Twilight sat on her balcony, watching Blazer walk out the door. She wasn’t sure if she should go after him or not, but she looked at Spike, who was hogtied on the couch...
“Hmm... Cock blocker...”
***
Blazer went for a walk through the town. There was nothing more upsetting to him than being beat down by his mare. It might be a while before he goes back to Twilight’s place... Or maybe just tomorrow...
***
Twilight couldn’t stand it anymore. She had to go after him. She didn’t know what to say to him, considering she just beat him down... But she had to... She wanted it... No, she needed it...
She looked back at her badass fly wings. Time to catch her coltfriend...
***
Blazer was at Sugarcube corner now. Still trying to deal with what happened, he thought some sugary sweetness is just what he needed.
“Hi! Idon’tthinkIhavemetyoubeforewhat’syourname?” Pinkie Pie said as she burst out from behind the counter, scaring the crap out of Blazer.
“Uhh... What?” Was all he could say.
“It’sokayifyouhaven’tmetmebutit’snotokaythatIhaven’tmetyouIknoweveryponyinthistownandnotknowingsomeponymakesmesadbecauseIwanttobeeverypony’sfriendand...”
Blazer felt his chest hurting from how much she was talking. He tries to tune her out, but to know prevail.
“...flwegq2lgbwkletlkwfjqnlwuigyrlqiufbhruoegvboedbqwefhiybqeruk... Wait, do you hear that?”
Blazer slowly unplugged his ears, because at that point he could actually understand her. Listening, he hears music playing.
I’m gonna be, the very best... Like no one ever was...
“What the hell?” Blazer said, “God, it sounds fucking terrible...”
To catch them is my real test. To train them is my cause....
“Pokemon! Ilovepokemondon’tyouPokemonisawesomeIrememberthisonetimeatbandcamp...”
Blazer groans loudly. How can I get her to shut the fuck up?! He thought, then he got an idea.
He gets up, walks over to Pinkie Pie and kisses her on the lips. The silence was music to Blazer’s ears.
Upon breaking the kiss and seeing Pinkie smiling, he knew he had to wipe that off her face.
“Now, shut the fuck up, you annoying shit!”
Pinkie kept smiling, like she was in some kind of daydream.
Crazy bitch... He thought, then started walking out of the Corner.
With a bright flash of pink, he felt lips lock again with the cotton candy-flavored pony. After a moment, Blazer gave way and started kissing her back. He began forcing his tongue into her mouth and then he turned and walked out.
But she wouldn’t let him leave...
***
Blazer awakes with a gasp. He looked around. He was on the outskirts of Ponyville. He could barely see it in the dim light Looking down, he saw he was in Pinkie’s bed, but he was also tied down...
Then he noticed Pinkie was on top of him...
Blazer knew what was going to happen next. Pinkie took her long fucking tongue and licked him all the way up his body. While Blazer’s mind was telling him no... His body said yes...
***
After ten hours of nonstop loving, Blazer rolled off of Pinkie Pie. He looked over at Twilight, who joined about halfway through, and felt he done good. He was just happy Pinkie untied him before they started. Pinkie Pie didn’t look tired whatsoever, whether it was because she is always hyper as hell, or it’s because she has done something like this many times in the past.
Then Blazer notices blood everywhere...
Looking around, he sees dead animals that have been mutilated and torn open that just line the walls completely. How they ended up in there, he has no idea, and he didn’t care. He was happy.
“Hey, hey, hey...”
He looks up at the door to see Fluttershy standing in the doorway.
“What?” Blazer said, “You want some too?”
“Not exactly....”
Then Blazer notices a chainsaw in her hooves.
Blazer and the two mare jumps off the bed, barely avoiding be cut by the chainsaw. Pinkie’s bed wasn’t so lucky...
“I’ll miss you, Steve...” Pinkie said, then she dived out a window. Twilight did the same, but Blazer didn’t get out in time...
“Do you know what happens next?” Fluttershy says as she starts to walk closer.
“No... What?”
Fluttershy is now right in his face.
“I...”
She raises the chainsaw above her head.
“Eat...”
After a moment of silence, Blazer opens his eyes to see Fluttershy used the chainsaw to cut cake.
“Want some?” She said, extending a hoof with cake on it.
“Uhh... Sure...”
“No!” Fluttershy throws the cake at him. “The cake is a lie!”
***
Gary wakes up. Looking around the room, he sees Spongebob’s bed next to him, and sighs.
In really wish I would stop having these strange dreams...
Gary yawns, then slowly falls back asleep.