//------------------------------// // epilogue: Diary of a goddess // Story: Conversion Bureau: St George // by kryxel //------------------------------// Eternity is long. Really long. One would have a difficult time imagining just how mind bogglingly long it really is. A rainy Sunday afternoon may feel like it lasts forever, but isn’t even comparable to the blink of an eye against the utter vastness of eternity. However, there were two ponies who could at least give a somewhat reasonable estimate of how long eternity truly was, and plan accordingly. So, when one day the two of them independently from one another decided to start writing a diary, they both came to a somewhat disheartening conclusion: even if they’d turn all matter within existence into paper and ink, it would still not be enough to document even one tenth of a billionth of their lifespan. They did find a solution to this problem, even if it meant their writing wouldn’t be nearly as permanent as they could have wished. Deep below Canterlot, even further down than the Potion production facility, was a long, winding stairway leading to a room only a very select few ponies knew about. Given the nature of the ponies that knew, stairs seemed to be a bit redundant since teleporting that far would have been little more than a slight nuisance. And, if the only goal was to reach that room, the staircase would have been entirely superfluous indeed. However, the sheer monotony of walking down that many steps with only the sound of one’s own hooves had a purpose all of its own, a fact Princess Celestia reflected on every time she got down far enough for the sounds of Canterlot Castle to fade away entirely. As every week before and every week to come, Princess Celestia made her way down the many stairs, leading to that tiny room a little over a thousand human feet below her throne room. If anypony were to see her right now, they would accuse her of being an impostor, since everypony only ever knew her with that eternal, faint motherly smile on her muzzle. Instead, her face shifted expressions across the entire spectrum of emotions as she let her mind wander. In here, on that staircase that might as well be without end, nopony would find her. In here, it was just her, and her thoughts of the last week. Arriving at the room, she looked around, only to find the room the exact same way as it always had been. A square room, no more than 30 human feet in either direction, with a sturdy-looking pedestal near the entrance and two large openings into the soil near the back wall, each of them large enough for the door-sized slab of marble she had carried along with her. One of the openings was occupied with a short stack of obsidian slabs, containing her Sister’s Diary, the other was occupied by the small marble altar formed by her own. In time, the slabs on which she wrote her memories of Equestria would sink into the earth and eventually fall into the rock-smelting heat of Tartarus itself, ages upon ages since the occurrences either were forgotten entirely, or faded into myth so far removed from reality nopony could ever hope to extract even a single fact from among the embellishments and rumors added. Placing the slab on the pedestal, Princess Celestia began her task of documenting the events that had transpired in the past week, speaking out loud as she wrote each word. “Date: 1006 after Nightmare Moon, thirtieth of the Growing month, regarding the preceding week. “This week has been as eventful as ever, though this time I found myself involved in these events rather than observing them. As I mentioned before, the elusive Doctor Whooves visited me a while back and convinced me to enlist the aid of the elusive Dr. Tennant for the St. George Conversion Bureau, explaining part of his nebulous origins in the process. Though I still have some issues with his casual approach to time travel, his advice has proven sound, and amongst other things earned me a promising new recruit to the Royal Guard in the process.” Halting her inscription of the massive slab for a moment, Princess Celestia let her mind wander for a moment as she thought of how Victorious Shield was adjusting to his new life. Ever since its founding, birds of a feather would quite often flock together in New York. As such, nobody was surprised much when several of the old city blocks would adjust to offer a safe haven almost exclusively to newfoals and native Equestrians alike. However, despite the easily recognized Equestrian influences, the old mores of the Big Apple survived well, and if one were ever looking for a good pitcher of genuine Equestrian mostly-alcohol-free Cider, Red Cheeks’ was the place to be. Despite being a bar for all intents and purposes, the neighboring areas weren’t what one would call a bad place to raise foals. As such, Amazing Grace had few objections to moving there when an apartment freed up due to the previous tenants moving over to Equestria. Neither did Victorious Shield have any trouble finding a job. “And stay out until you learn some manners!” the sturdily built Unicorn shouted as he pushed the drunk human out of the bar and watched him stumble, only barely keeping upright. The man slurred some drunk insults, none of which made any sense or were any bit insulting, as he swayed out of the pony district in search of alcohol, leaving Victorious to shake his head. “How did he even manage to get that drunk?” His fellow bouncer Red Rope slapped him on the withers, laughing loudly. “Don’t worry about such people, they’ll figure things out eventually. Trust me, he won’t be back for a long time!” the jovial Earth pony shouted, making Victorious wonder once again if the large grey pony knew any volume other than “shouting” or “loudly speaking.” Victorious brushed the hoof off of him. “If you say so.” Red chuckled softly, meaning only the building he was in could hear him instead of the entire block. “Either way, you were talking about your wife and foals?” Victorious nodded, a slight smile creeping onto his face. “Yeah. The twins are doing great, I could swear I saw Chip levitate something yesterday...” Celestia smiled as she thought of her potential future guard, before quickly switching to another among her new subjects. “Silver Aura, another one of the newfoals who was involved in the same incident, is adjusting well, despite the traumatizing events following his conversion. It still proves a positive decision to let miss Rainbow Springs adopt him...” Tacksworn was one of Equestria’s most far-removed towns, and the distance from even the nearest trading hub showed in the somewhat utilitarian buildings. Still, what the town lacked in physical ways to express its wealth, it made up for in the sheer diversity of its inhabitants. However, when ponies, Gryphons, Diamond Dogs and Dragons lived together, one would often need a strong hand to take care of the various young. Or, in this case, a strong hoof. “Melissa Hildsdottir! Rover! How many times to I have to remind you of the rules!?” Rainbow Springs sternly spoke as she pushed the Gryphon fledgling off the Diamond dog pup. “B-but she start it, miss! She not give Rover shiny toy!” the young Diamond dog started. “Toy!?! This is a family heirloom, mutt! Keep your grubby claws off of it!” the fierce Gryphon shouted back, now clutching the polished silver emblem in her claws. Rainbow Springs bowed down, coming face to face with the young creatures. “Now, Rover, what did I tell you about taking things from others?” The tiny Diamond dog looked a little guilty as he responded, his head bowed down and his fore paws behind his back. “... not good to take things that are not Rover’s, without OK.” Rainbow Springs smiled, before turning her attention to the young Gryphon, catching her mid-raspberry. “And what have I taught you about sharing, Melissa?” Melissa had almost bit her tongue when Rainbow addressed her, and was now looking as if she were searching for an escape route. Eventually though, she sighed and hung her head as well. “’Don’t bring something you won’t share, nobody likes a braggart.’ But, Miss Springs! I-” Rainbow Springs shook her head, stopping Melissa’s argument dead in its tracks. “Melissa, Rover, if I catch you fighting over this shield again, I will confiscate it until your parents come to pick you up. Do you understand me?” The two youngsters nodded mutely. “Very well then. Play nicely,” Rainbow Springs said with a smile as she raised back to her hooves. “Yes miss Springs,” both of them said together. “Alright then, move along,” the kindergarten caretaker said, smiling as the two ran off, doubtlessly in search of more trouble. Rainbow Springs shook her head, silently chuckling to herself. “Those two... they’ll learn some day, I’m sure.” Looking over to the large cage of nets encompassing the flying practice area, she couldn’t keep her smile from growing as her son struggled and managed to get airborne under his own power, his wings still beating as fast as those of a humming bird. “Keep it up, my bright light, one day you’ll be a great Captain of the Royal Guard...” Celestia couldn’t stop a chuckle as she thought of the boy-turned-foal, before focusing on the task at hoof once more. “Regardless of the successes though, there are some who lost more than their human existence that day. Lives were lost, and until the end of time I will remember those that gave their lives for their beliefs. Still, during the attack, one man lost something that is not easily regained...” ’First rule, steady breath.’ Even after leaving for Equestria, Terrence found that certain parts of his past didn’t go away quite as easily. Even after she adopted the name of Eagle Eye, fact remained that for all intents and purposes, she was a sharpshooter. ’Second rule, mind the wind.’ This posed a problem, as the arrow-in-a-bulls-eye on her flank marked her as a mare of a little-sought-for talent. After all, Equestria tended to resolve its problems through diplomatic means, and the last actual skirmish had been ages ago, aside from the incidents since contact with Earth. ’Third rule, know where you will hit.’ However, a settlement as far removed from civilization as Appleloosa did still have use for an exceptionally sharp pair of eyes. After all, being able to spot trouble before it could take the town by surprise was a valuable asset indeed, especially in times like these, when the borders of the various kingdoms, countries and regions were more prone to change than Discord’s preferences. ’Fourth rule, heart, lungs, eyes or throat.’ Still, there was a lot of down time between guard shifts, so Eagle Eye had to find another source of income. Something that could be done during more peaceful times, would allow her to practice her gift, and yet would still earn her upkeep. Showbiz fit the bill on all accounts. ’Last rule, no second thoughts, no regrets!’ Eagle’s hoof shot forward, the sharp knife in it crossing the space between her and her target in less time than it took to blink. With a sharp *tak*, the knife buried itself a good inch into the wood of said target. Eagle stood frozen for a moment, the red-and-white board Redglare was tied to no longer in sight. What if her aim had been off? What if there had been an errant breeze? Most of her worries were silenced when the crowd went wild, stomping the ground in a pony applause, making her look up to a smiling (and still tied-down) Redglare, the edge of the knife still uncomfortably close to her jugular vein- ’NO!’ Eagle Eye shook her head a few times before facing the crowd. ’I didn’t kill her, and I never will!’ she thought as she forced her muzzle into a smile and bowed elegantly. Once the show was over and Eagle had dunked her head into a bowl of cool water often enough, she met up with a smiling Redglare again. “You almost had me worried there, with that last knife. You usually don’t give me such a close shave,” Redglare said with a chuckle. Eagle flinched in response. “D-did I hit you!? ImsosorryIdidntmeanto-” Before she could continue her ramble, Redglare silenced her with a hoof on her lips. “Calm down, featherbrain, you didn’t break skin. All I’m saying is, you cut a few hairs,” she said as she turned her neck, showing a thin line where her coat was just a hair thinner. “See? At worst, I should thank you for making the heat a little more bearable.” Eagle calmed down a little, though a tear rolled down her cheek. “...I could have hurt you...” Redglare laid her head over Eagle’s withers, drawing her into a pony hug. “You could, but you didn’t.” For the longest time, the two friends stood there, until eventually Eagle’s tears stopped. “Feeling better now?” Eagle Eye nodded. “Do you want to talk about it?” Eagle Eye shook her head, still resting at the base of Redglare’s neck. “Want to see what trouble Wild Wheat got into today?” Eagle chuckled a little, silently wondering what and how the farmer-turned-pony had been doing lately. Despite her new body being uniquely adapted to farm work, Jane’s behavior ever since she took the moniker of Wild Wheat wasn’t much like the usual Earth pony method of sticking to what they knew worked. Last she knew, the stubborn mare had been trying to force the ground into retaining the water the sparse rainfall brought, which mostly resulted in a lot of frustration on her part and unintentional amusement on everypony else’s part. Eagle Eye nodded, silently breaking the hug. Redglare nodded, a playful smile on her muzzle. “Then, let’s go! I heard she was visiting Braeburn tonight again. I still wonder how he can fancy somepony who looks so much like his cousin...” Celestia stopped writing for a moment, a sad look crossing her face. So many of her new subjects carried wounds that would take a lot of time to heal, perhaps even longer than their lifespans would allow. Taking a deep breath, she continued again. “My dear Sister recently acquired two new recruits to her Royal Guard. However, unlike most of her guard, they are actual Nocturnal ponies. The fact that the old Bloodline of Luna’s guard died out after the Nightmare’s banishment worries me a little, but she insists that they are reliable. On top of that, Luna insists that the two of them are her ‘OTP,’ apparently meaning she considers them a couple. I’ll need to have a serious conversation with her regarding matchmaking, once I learn where they came from...” Ever since the Sisters ascended to the thrones of Equestria, their Royal Guards were the very image of their rule, carrying out whichever mission they were tasked with for the betterment of Equestria as a whole. Still, some ponies asked questions about them. First and foremost among them, “How come the guards all look the same, and why?” For Celestia’s Guard, the answers were quite straightforward. The members of Her Guard dyed their coats and had some enchantments built into their armor to change their eye color to the same cyan hue. And though the story behind it was mostly lost to time, nopony could deny the striking resemblance to General Boiling Blood, leading to a few rumors about what went on between them on top of allowing for Prince Blue Blood’s claim to fame. Luna’s guard on the other hoof relied entirely on illusions woven into their armor, mostly because the changes to their horns and wings were so complicated, it simply was easier to just add a dye job to the network of spells running through their plating. Still, the question of “why” was not quite as easily answered. For as long as Princess Luna had shared the throne with her Sister, scholars had been searching for an answer as to why the Princess of the Night insisted on granting her closest followers with the wings and eyes of Dragons. The search for an answer was a futile one however, since if anypony would bother to just ask Princess Luna for the motivation behind her Guard’s look, she would have answered without hesitation. Truth was, she insisted on the look out of sheer nostalgia. Though the evidence for it had been eroded to near-nothingness, when Equestria was first formed there were three races, two genders, and, unlike any other species since, two branches of ponies. One branch loved the day, frolicking and working from sunrise to sunset. The other branch however embraced the night, keeping a watchful eye over the resting ponies and keeping them from harm. Since the rise and banishment of Nightmare moon however, members of the latter branch found themselves in the decidedly uncomfortable position of superficially resembling the mare who had tried to permanently remove the sun from the sky, not to mention that her royal guard and closest allies mostly consisted of these Nocturnal ponies. While the specifics vary between accounts, fact remains that by the time Luna returned the Nocturnal branch of ponykind was extinct, the only proof of their existence being a hoof-full of millennium-old stories. That, and many traces of their genetic heritage existing in every pony alive. Traces, which would take some unusual circumstances to reemerge. And it would take a particularly jaded individual to deny that being converted after surviving a nuclear detonation at point-blank range was anything less than ridiculously weird. Shadow Wing sighed, wondering for the umpteenth time why he let his Princess talk him into taking that name. “Remind me why we are doing this,” he muttered to the pony in the tiny cart he was pulling. The mare chuckled, knowing fully well that he would be able to hear her. “Well, Hal, I am doing this because Her Royal Majesty Princess Luna ordered me to. You do remember how I feel about orders, don’t you?” “Stop calling me that, Elane, you know I left that name in the dirt,” Shadow replied. “Besides, I was asking why it had to be us! Our comrades get to do their job and guard ponies, and what do we get? Dragon duty!” Another giggle sounded through the night, caught only by Shadow’s remarkable hearing. “I’ll stop calling you that once you start calling me by my name. Surely you remember it?” Shadow rolled his eyes. “Suuure, Star Glint, not like I could forget a name as ridiculous as that. Still, remind me again why we are heading this ‘diplomatic mission of importance beyond understatement,’ when the last time you opened your mouth you almost got thrown in jail.” Glint shot him an annoyed look, one he thankfully didn’t notice. “As the Princess said, the dragons have had a preference for contact with the Nocturnal ponies for ages, which you would have known if you paid attention for once!” Shadow shook his head, momentarily taking his eyes off the distant volcano they were flying towards. “I’ll do that, the day you pay attention when things go bad. Or did you forget about Mt. Svartvinge?” Glint grimaced, being thankful that their night vision didn’t let them see through the backs of their heads. “...No. And I still remember what you told me, before the rest of the guard caught up.” Shadow almost stalled, but barely managed to retain his stability. “Y-you heard that!?” “hmm... yes. Though, for now you better focus on the mission. We’re here.” Focusing on his flight again, Shadow indeed noted they were just about to reach the volcano, and he started looking for a place to land. After finding a small but sufficient ledge and securing the cart against the stiff winds around the towering volcano, the two set out for the Dragon Elder they were supposed to meet. Looking up to the dull red glow marking the top of the volcano, Shadow silently wished they could just land up there. Sadly, their briefing had been clear on that account. Landing near the entrance to the Elder’s abode would be seen as a direct attack, making a diplomatic agreement even harder to reach than it would normally have been. Besides, he couldn’t just leave Glint behind, right? “Well, looks like we’ll have to climb from here out. Ready, batbrain?” Glint said as she looked to the top as well. Shadow scoffed. “Sure, syringe-for-a-brain. Just try to keep up for a change!” he said with a determined smile, charging towards the side of the mountain, leaving Glint in his dust. “H-hey! Not fair!” Glint shouted as she started chasing after him, grinning as she struggled to keep up... “... but I suspect it will be quite a while before I learn of their origin, knowing my dear Sister’s penchant for secrecy,” Celestia softly smiled as she inscribed the white stone slab before her. Hours passed as she patiently inscribed the other events of the week on the slab, eventually turning it over and filling the other side as well, until she reached the last few inches of smooth rock. “Finally, the Doctor’s earlier prediction came true. It is a shame about the mosaic in the bathroom, but I’m certain the repair crew will do an admirable job repairing it. Still, it saddens me that, yet again, he disappeared before we could sit down and talk, though I still hold some hope we can discuss certain matters of importance soon. Time will tell, and if anything, I am a patient mare. Regardless of all that, his actions directly led to not only the safety of my Most Faithful Student Twilight Sparkle, but also that of many of my subjects. For that, I am grateful. And though I still have misgivings about such reckless use of time travel, fact remains that his influence on history has been proven mostly benevolent so far. “As such, Doctor Whooves, if by chance you read this, know that I mean you no harm, and would in fact wish to sit down and share tea with you once more. Though, I must insist that one of the subjects discussed will be your flagrant disregard of privacy. A mare’s diary is private, thank you kindly. “As sure as the Sun will rise, “Celestia.” With a single beat of her wings, Celestia blew away the dust gathered on the slab before giving her work a last inspection. Nodding to herself as she found no errors, she lifted the slab from its pedestal and carried it over to the small stack slowly sinking into the ground. Taking one last sigh of the stale air, she glanced to her Sister’s diary. One peek would have been all it took to learn the origins of her Sister’s remarkable recruits, plus moon-knows how much more. Looking at the last line of her own diary however, proved to be enough. None of her loyal subjects would appreciate a hypocrite leading them after all. Turning her back on the stacks of slabs, the Princess of Equestria left the room, once again climbing the countless stairs leading to the tiny room. If anypony knew of the ritual, they would demand why she would even bother climbing that many steps. After all, while the downward path had its reasons for existing, surely the climb back up wouldn’t need to exist? Still, nopony but her Sister knew, and Celestia didn’t worry about anypony else finding out. Besides, the climb downwards was for the future, to remember all that had happened so that old mistakes didn’t have to be made again. To complement that, the climb upwards was dedicated to the past, to the endless memories of joy and hurt, and the unending resilience of her little ponies. Smiling as she climbed ever higher, Celestia started to softly sing, the sound of her voice being the only thing besides the steady clip-clop of her hooves. “My little pony, my little pony, what will todays adventure be? My little pony, my little pony, will there be exiting sights to see...?”