//------------------------------// // Gangs All Here // Story: A Whole New World // by Van50608 //------------------------------// Chapter 16 Gangs All Here Three hours later Michael woke up from falling face first into Equestia. I was sitting by him in the street making sure that nobody tried to steal his stuff. Yes, I should have taken to a hospital, but I decided that if he was dead than it would be a waste of my bits. I did just realized that i haven't looked at him yet he was a unicorn with a fiddle as his cutie mark, had a light brown coat, a darker brown mane, and (opens eyes) bright sky blue eyes. After making my observations on his appearance I waited and waited and waited some more until I was just about to fuck it and pronounce him dead as a doorknob he woke up and grabbed my back hoof and finished his sentence with a "CCCCCKKKKK". Until he noticed that he had grabbed my leg and said "Sorry mister, but can you tell me where I am?". I said "Michael it Van and were in Equestria!". He looked at me stupidly and asked "Equestiwhere?". I facehoofed and said "Land of the ponies". Apparently the light bulb went on and he said "Oh yeah Equestria wait can I ever go home?". I said "Nope". He replied "Great I hated that place. Now can you give me a tour of where your living?". I said "Sure, but it's defiantly not here. Hold on". And we transported back to Ponyville. With a flash we arrived in Ponyville of the store Fiddles n Stuff. I looked over at him and said "To celebrate you coming here I'm going to buy you the best damn fiddle you've ever seen". "Fuck Yeah!". He yelled in his loudest voice which seemed to attract a lot of people towards him. Lots were wondering who his this new mystery pony was and why he was randomly shouting obstinacies in the middle of a public full of fillies. I motioned him to go in and said "Alright let's go inside before someone calls the royal guard on your ass". And we walked inside to Fiddles n Stuff to find ourselves a high quality instrument. Three long hours late of fiddle browsing Michael finally found himself the perfect fiddle. A hardwood oak, custom stringed, specially handcrafted, fucking expensive as hell fiddle. It cost OVER 9000 bits and we were starting to run low so we would have to ask Celestia for more bits soon, but that doesn't matter now because Michael is happy and he has an infinite supply of cheese pizza! So how can I be mad at him for having to spend 9000 bits besides we'd probably eat about that much in pizza anyway so I guess I still owe hike even more of that. After our little shipping trip we finally took out tour. We went to Twilight's library, Sweet Apple Acres, Rarity's Boutique, Town Square, and finally our house where we opened the door and looked in to see everypony on the couch relaxing. Cory said "Hey who's this fucker?". Elliott looked over at him and said "Looks familiar but I can't put my finger. Fuck! Hoof on it". A light bulb went off in Graham's head and he said "Is that a fiddle?". Michael said "Yes And If you don't know who I am you will now!". And played his solo part from the song "Little Girls" ft Austin. And when he was finished him everyone said in unison "Van is that the fiddler?". I replied "Damn straight". Jacob asked "How in Fucks name did you get him in here?". I Said " Pinkie has a phone that can break the fourth wall and open portals to get here, but not back. Also his brought pizza". " Elliott started again "So how in fuck name does that work". I said "Pinkie Pie. Don't ask". That seemed to do the trick for them and I said "Lets do something we haven't done for a long time, but we did it every time we say each other". Michael asked "And what might that be". I started to say something, but Cory effectively cut me off and yelled "Blow Shit Up!". Graham yelled "Fuck Yeah!". And I yelled " To Quills and Sofas for explosives! Away!". And we all trotted of to get our explosives for a fun night. After exhaustion just about all our bits we finally had enough explosives to have some fun. We went out to one of the more remote parts of the town to blow our shit up. We grabbed some Semtex, some frag grenades, C4, and some TNT and we were going to blow up stuffed animals on a wide open plane. We placed our animals down and I said "Michael since your new you have the honors here so have the first explosion. I hoofed him a frag grenade and he said "Thanks. Now let's get it on! Frag Out!". And chucked his grenade at a nearby manticore doll and effectively blew it to high hell. After we ran out of explosives and stuffed animals we decided that it would be about time to walk home. I said to Michael "Hey I have a problem for you to solve". He said " Let me guess. Women". I replied "Yep". He said quizzically "explain your problem". I elaborated with my story and when I was finished he said " Well it seems to me that you have some apologizing to do just say "I was drunk I didn't mean it. I'm sorry and I'll never do it again please forgive me. That's most likely your best move". I yelled at him " Michael that will never work! It's the biggest rip-off of every chick flick ever!". He replied defensively "Then you figure it out dumbass". I gave in and said "Fine I'll go to Canterlot as soon as possible and just then Elliott burst in the room and says "Guys we have a problem".