//------------------------------//
// New, Wacky Creature Discovered in Ponyville 
// Story: The Onion: Equestrian Bureau 
// by The Read Later List 
//------------------------------//

New, Wacky Creature Discovered in Ponyville

Artist rendition of the little guy

Ponyville, Equestria- Following a small rift opening up in the middle of Ponyville square, a new bipedal, fun-loving creature  has risen to great popularity among the young and old alike.  The strange creature is what authorities believe to be a half monkey, half dragon hybrid with an affinity for long black boots, playing hide and seek, and drawing the same red symbol that resembles a medical cross with 4 emendations branching from the sides.

Sources confirmed that after a small misunderstanding between the the creature and the Ponyville police department, the "mensch" as he calls himself, began to entertain Ponyville's population with wacky antics that included incomprehensible babble, a series of screaming rants, and his overall pouty attitude in which we believe was an effort to make it evident that he was hungry.  It seems as though one pony, Twilight Sparkle, has taking a liking to the creature and has promptly applied to adopt him as her pet.

"Well, at first I was a little bit distracted when he mistakingly set fire to a pile of books from my library in what I think was an attempt to warm himself up," said Princess Twilight Sparkle, a resident of Ponyville.  "But then I saw his cute little upper lip hair and that sad mane combover, and well, I just couldn't let the little cutie starve on the streets.  It's weird that he would start a fire in the middle of July though... and he has a pretty heavy coat on as well...  I guess he just gets cold really easy."

Dapper little "Spot", as Sparkle has come to refer to him as because of the spot of hair on his upper lip, has taken Equestria by storm, garnering a colt following of fans who would squee at the chance of petting him or giving him a treat.  Even though most think Spot is a kind, loving creature who would never cause harm to anypony no matter what, some believe that he is a danger to society.

"We do not know where this creature came from," said Ponyville veterinarian Nasal Spray.  "For all we know, it can be carrying some disease that could be putting us all at risk.  I mean, look at it.  After giving it a glance up close, I found it to be extremely out of shape and had no desire at all to exercise.  It's almost as if this sprightly young animal was stricken with some terrible illness that gave him the physique of a fifty year old stallion.  But then again... he is awfully cute with that little uniform of his."

When reached for a comment, Spot had this to say:  "Wenn dies die Hölle ist, wo sind dann die Juden?"