//------------------------------//
// one 
// Story: Comic Relief 
// by ThatGirlOnFire 
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There were days when she found it hard to sleep because of the tears. Other times they helped- her own sobs working as a sort of lullaby for herself. 
This night was more of the former.
Pinkie Pie tossed and turned, tears streaking down her face, sheets tangling around her pink body. Her mane was snarled around her hooves as she writhed in a ineffective attempt to get comfortable enough to sleep.
Their faces wouldn't stop flashing in her mind.
Rainbow Dash was first, as usual. As if she would allow herself to be anything but. In the visions, she was watching Pinkie with that seductive look on her face, wings outstretched toward Pinkie.
Then Twilight Sparkle appeared, smiling as Rainbow Dash tugged away her book. 
Fluttershy was next- that soft pink hair Pinkie had always just wanted to bury herself in and stay in forever  cascading down her neck and hiding her gentle smile. She was lying her head on Twilight's side, eyes half-closed as if she was falling asleep.
Rarity waltzed into view, purple curls flowing down her shoulders as she laughed and kissed Applejack, who was beside Fluttershy and underneath her wing. 
The five mares- gorgeous, gorgeous mares, Pinkie thought- all began kissing and embracing one another. The dream-Pinkie watched them with a smile on her face. "Can I play too?.." she asked, bouncing up and down. The dream-mares began to laugh. Not the nice, cheerful laughs Pinkie truly adored hearing. Cruel, twisted laughs. The kind that made it clear they weren't laughing with Pinkie. They were laughing at her. 
Dream-Pinkie stared at her friends, eyes widened with shock as they laughed and jeered and booed and laughed and it hurt it hurt it hurt it hurt ithurtithurtithurt--


Pinkie sat up in bed, not so much surprised as listlessly tired. She had known it would come when she finally slept, it always did, really. 

Sometimes she wanted to find them, to gather them together and tell them all how she felt. Tell them how much their smiling faces made her heart so happy and made her want to smile too... 
But each fantasy devolved into that same demented image of her friends, watching her, and laughing. 
So she didn't tell them. Maybe it was better that things stay this same way, with them oblivious to her adoration and her dying on the inside.
She kept up a brave front. She couldn't let them see how much it cut when they smiled at her. She had to keep smiling, for Ponyville if nothing else. She knew how much her laughter and smiles mattered to some of the ponyies when they were having a bad day. She was the constant, the one thing that stayed exactly the same between the day-to-day dramas and heartbreaks. When Bon-Bon broke up with Lyra, Pinkie Pie was there to cheer Lyra up and help them get back together. When Berry Punch lost her job, Pinkie Pie was there to help her feel better and start applications to new jobs.
She was the glue that held Ponyville together. She couldn't change. She had to stay the same while everyone else changed. 

She was the one who kept things from slipping into the darkness, from becoming too teary and sad. She couldn't start crying herself, could she? After all, she was the element of Laughter, and tears are virtually the opposite of Laughter. So she hid her tears, smiled wide, and pretended everything would be alright. 
Everything would be alright.
Everything would be alright.
It would, wouldn't it?
It would.
It wouldn't.