//------------------------------// // Problems and Solutions. // Story: The Princess and the Human // by Ausbrony //------------------------------// Chapter 2: Problems and Solutions This couldn’t be real; there was no possible way that Kai was staring at a purple horse in his living room. “What is this thing? Is it real?” he thought. “And its eyes are freakin huge!” Twilight was a little dazed. She had intended to teleport to the courtyard just outside her door. The initial test had gone well so what the hay went wrong? She found herself in a dark room with a very strange bipedal creature staring at her. “What is it?” she wondered. “And why does it possess such small eyes?” The staring match continued for a few more minutes until it was Twilight who found her voice first. “Um… if I may ask, what are you exactly? And where am I?” She kept her voice low in case it decided to attack her. But it was silent; it just sat on the floor with its legs crossed underneath it. It made Twilight hurt just thinking about it. Oh wait! Maybe it didn’t understand her? Kai sat cross-legged on the floor. The weird purple horse had just spoke, which gave him a fresh dose of brain hurt. But it hadn’t attacked him yet, and the subtle pain in his leg from when he tripped was a decent indicator that this wasn’t a dream. So there was only one logical step to take… “What… are you?” he asked slowly as so not to frighten it. There was another awkward silence as the two different beings processed their thoughts and came to the same conclusion. “This is so weird!” they said in unison, and then for some reason, the both of them broke out into giggles. “In answer to your questions,” Kai began to answer once the giggle fit had subsided. “My name is Kai, and you are in my apartment.” Twilight nodded slowly. Given the sound of its voice, Twilight gathered that this ‘Kai’ was male. “Um, my name is Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “May I ask again, what are you?” Well it was an odd question, Kai knew what he was. “Well, I’m a human,” he replied. “And what on earth are you?” “A pony.” Twilight simply replied. She had heard of humans before, the fictional creatures from storybooks. But surely they couldn’t be real!? … Were Lyra’s weird conspiracy theories actually true? … Kai decided to ask another question. “Are you by chance… a Unicorn?” he said. Wait? He knew of Unicorns? Then maybe there were other ponies around somewhere. “Yes, well sort of,” Twilight confirmed. “I am Princess Twilight Sparkle, the Alicorn Princess of Magic.” Sweet Celestia it was a long winded title, but maybe now she would get somewhere. “Princess? Alicorn? Magic!?” The human Kai slapped his face with the appendage on his arm. Did he just do the equivalent of a facehoof? “You have got to be kidding me! I wake up to get a drink of water, and now a fairy tale creature is sitting in my living room, saying it’s a princess of magic?” He suddenly stood up. The fluid motion of such an act made Twilight nauseous, just by how he moved like that with no tail or other appendages to support him. He just seemed to defy gravity and physics. He took a single step towards her and without warning, reached out and touched her! Twilight suddenly backed up and looked at him wide-eyed in shock, her face holding the slightest touch of pink. “J-j-just what do you think you’re doing!?” she said, surprised that the ‘human’ would just touch her like that. “I’m just making sure this isn’t all a weird-ass dream,” he said. He walked towards another room and switched on the light, causing Twilight to blink painfully. “I need some coffee,” he muttered. “Do you want anything to drink?” he asked. Twilight was taken aback a bit by the question, but she was a little thirsty now that he mentioned. “Um, some water perhaps?” she replied. Kai returned a moment later with a mug of coffee in one hand and a glass of water in the other. He set the water down next to her and then sat on the sofa nearby. Twilight nodded thankfully but when she attempted to levitate the glass, she found it to be rather difficult. Twilight managed a few sips before setting the glass back down. “I guess I burned out my magic with that teleportation,” she determined. Kai watched her horn light up with a gentle pink light and lift the glass without even touching it. Was that really magic that she used? He took a sip from his coffee and glanced at the wall clock. 4:20 a.m. Good thing he didn’t have work today. Twilight closed her eyes for a moment as the use of what little magic she possessed had given her a slight headache. It was then she noticed that she didn’t have her Element on her. She glanced around but didn’t see it lying somewhere. Did it get left behind? Kai’s voice broke the silence once more. “So uh… what are you doing here exactly?” It was a valid question, but unfortunately… “I don’t know,” Twilight replied quietly. “It was just supposed to be a simple teleportation spell; I’ve done it hundreds of times so I just don’t know what went wrong.” She went over every detail in her head, the placement of the crystals had been perfect, and the spell incantation was flawless. The previous transport had worked and she remembered to factor in the difference in her calculations such as the subjects mass and density, etc… so why? Twilight appeared to be deep in thought. Whatever had brought her here must have been an accident. What was he supposed to do now? “Too bad there isn’t a Teleporting Unicorns for Dummies book,” he muttered sarcastically. Twilight’s ears perked up when he mentioned a book. “There’s a book on teleportation here?” she asked excitedly. “May I see it?” Kai shook his head, “No, I said I wish there were, but teleportation is impossible,” he informed her. “It only happens in things like fictional books and movies.” “Magic is quite real.” Twilight huffed and lit up her horn once more. It flickered, like a light bulb about to go out, but still managed to levitate a pillow next to Kai. “See!” she said proudly, “Magic is quite simple, though it mine should be a little stronger, even if I did burnout.” Kai looked at the pillow that she had levitated for all of about 2 seconds. “Be that as it may” he said. “Magic doesn’t exist here, just smoke and mirror illusions.” This was news that Twilight didn’t want to hear. Her magic would return with rest, but if magic truly didn’t exist here… then returning home might be rather difficult. “I… I think I need to sleep,” she said, sounding defeated. Kai nodded, he would think better with sleep and a clear head. This evening was weird above all else, but he still had a strict set of manners. “Do you want the bed?” he asked the odd houseguest. “I imagine you’ll need it more than I do.” Twilight shook her head; she was the guest after all, circumstances aside. She couldn’t just show up out of the blue and take his bed. “Oh, no. I simply couldn’t…” “Don’t worry about it,” Kai replied. “I often doze off on the couch anyhow so I don’t mind at all.” He got up and headed into his room to clean the bed of any dirty clothes and did a general tidy of his room. It had to house a Princess after all! It took about fifteen minutes and once he emerged to tell Twilight that it was ready, she was sound asleep on the floor, snoring adorably. “Well I guess that’s that then.” He knelt down and once he figured out a way, he lifted her off the floor with a slight grunt. She weighed more than she looked! He carried her into his room and placed her gently on the bed. She groaned slightly but drifted back into a deep sleep almost straight away. “She really does look like a cartoon character or something.” Kai wondered just what the hell he would do now. People would probably freak if she was discovered and she be hauled off to be experimented on like some lab animal. “I guess we’ll discuss it tomorrow though.” Kai yawned and headed back out to the living room couch, grabbing a spare blanket on the way out. Tomorrow would be interesting to say the least… *** It was well into the day by the time Twilight awoke. She opened her eyes slowly and lifted her head to look around. The room she was in was darkened due to the thick, heavy curtains and she lit up her horn to slide one open, blinking painfully from both the sudden intrusion of sunlight and the sharp pain in her horn. Glancing around some more, she noticed an analogue clock next to the bed and noticed that the numbers were different to Equestrian numbers. “The design looks the same though,” she said quietly. “If numbers are similar, then I/m guessing it’s about a quarter to ten…” She sat bolt upright and jumped out of the bed. She stumbled and landed roughly on the ground with a loud thump, not expecting the bed to be so high off of the ground. The door opened and Kai walked in to see the alicorn lying on the floor, tangled among the bed sheets. “Are you okay?” he asked, stifling a small laugh at the indignantly positioned pony. “Ow.” Twilight picked herself up and shook off the sheets. “Yeah, I was a little higher up than I thought.” She got to her hooves and used her wings to dust herself off. She opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted by a loud rumbling sound, A sound coming from her empty stomach. She blushed, looking a little embarrassed. “Guess I’m a little hungry,” she said. Kai nodded and motioned towards the living room. “I made some breakfast, but I’m not sure what you’d eat…” Twilight followed him out into the kitchen and saw several plates on the table with various types of food, pancakes, fruit and vegetables and scrambled eggs. Kai sat down and picked up an English muffin with egg and an odd brownish red substance. “What’s that?” Twilight pointed with her hoof, her curiosity getting the better of her. Kai took a bite and chewed before answering. “Just a bacon and egg muffin,” he replied before taking another bite. “Bacon?” It took a moment for Twilight to realise what it actually was and took an uneasy step back. “You… you’re a… a carnivore!?” Twilight suddenly didn’t feel so safe anymore. What if he wanted to eat her for dinner? She couldn’t use her magic still and he could probably overpower her, tie her up and do whatever he wanted with her… Wait! Where the heck was this train of thought going!? Kai watched the alicorn with a bemused look as she trotted about in a small circle, muttering and wearing a panicked expression on her face. It was pretty cute. “Hey!” he decided to call out, derailing whatever it was she was thinking off. “Are you done? Because there’s I’d like to explain something to you.” Twilight turned on the spot and looked at the human sitting at the small table. Her face blank and her eyes wide. “For starters,” Kai began. “Yes, I consume meat, most humans do in fact. Meat provides several important minerals that the human body requires to survive and function.” He picked up a piece of tomato from the salad on the table and popped it into his mouth. “But we also consume fruit, vegetable and grains…” Twilight suddenly smiled as she realised what he was getting at. “So humans are omnivores then?” Kai nodded and took another bite from his muffin. “There are humans that refuse to eat meat or are even allergic to it, so they get by with vitamin tablets and whatnot… I guess the point I am trying to make though is that if you are concerned, I will not eat you. Okay?” Twilight just gave him a sheepish smile and walked back over to the table, taking a mouthful of salad and chewing. It was actually quite nice~ *** After breakfast and now she was feeling a little more awake, Twilight took a better look around the abode she now found herself in. It was rather small in comparison to her library or her friends’ houses, but it still had that homey feel. The living room was the largest and focused as the centre point of the home. It had a heavy looking door with at least half a dozen locks on the inside of it. Kai explained that it was the front door and the locks were added security. Against the left side wall, next to the front door was a desk with an odd-looking device. It was a large rectangular, yet thin box with what appeared to be a pane of glass on the front. After giving it a quizzical stare, Kai explained that it was called a computer. An electronic device that could be used to perform all kinds of tasks. Twilight vowed she would take a better look at that later. The wall next to it had a window in the centre and a couch just underneath it. The couch had some blankets haphazardly tossed onto one end of it and Twilight felt guilty once more about taking his bed. Next to the couch was the door that led to his bedroom and a second that Kai said led to the bathroom. The next wall was just lined with shelves that contained books, some small statues of human girls in cute outfits and thin, plastic cases that Twilight didn’t recognise. “Those are video games.” Kai explained. “I’ll show you those later.” The next wall was the kitchen and then she was back to the start again. Like she said, not a real big place. “Do all humans live like this?” she asked. Kai shook his head. “No, some humans have much larger houses, mansions… even castles and palaces. Other humans don’t live in a house at all…” Twilight wandered over to the window and gazed out of it. What she saw made her gasp in surprise. It was an enormous city, spread out as far as the eye could see. “Oh wow…” she said in awe of the grand sight. “It’s even bigger that Canterlot!” “Canterlot?” Kai questioned. “Is that where you’re from?” “Sort of,” Twilight replied, her eyes still staring out the window of the seventh floor apartment. “I have a research laboratory and observatory in Canterlot, but my home is the library in Ponyville.” “Canterlot, Ponyville?” Kai face palmed at the bad puns. Their city planner has a really bad sense of humour. But bad jokes aside, there was something else he had to ask her. “Uh, Twilight was it?” Twilight turned to face him and nodded. What was the cause at his sudden change of tone? “I need to ask you, what will you do until you can return home?” Kai asked the purple alicorn. “Well by my estimates, I think it should take about a week for my magic to return to full strength, in the meantime, I’m going to try to figure out where my spell went wrong and how to reverse its affects.” She glanced back towards the window, “Maybe I’ll explore this world a little too, see what it’s like.” “That’s the problem!” Kai said. “I hate to tell you this, but flying purple unicorns simply do not exist here. They never have.” He sat on the couch and looked her in the eye. “If you go outside and get seen, you would most likely be captured and experimented on…” Kai had a sullen look on his face, he wasn’t proud of some of humanity’s ‘acomplishments’ but humans weren’t all bad. “Look, I don’t want to see you get hurt, and I sure as hell don’t want humans getting their hands on your magic… so if you want, you can hide out here until your better. I have enough room and you’ll be kept fed and safe… if you want to.” Were humans as dangerous as Kai led her to believe? She really wanted to go out and see what this world was like. But the idea of being an experiment wasn’t all too appealing either. Kai seemed nice enough though and the offer was quite generous… “If you want to learn…” Kai continued. “I can try to figure out a way to sneak you into the public library near here.” Twilight’s ears instantly pricked up at the mere mention of the word library. “You have a library near here!?” she asked excitedly. “Yeah, I do some part time work there on weekend evenings,” Kai explained and then let out a small chuckle. “Besides, this way I get to read all I want without having to actually buy the book.” This news infinitely improved Twilight’s mood. With a library, she could research all she wanted without the necessary field work. “So what are we waiting for? Let’s go!” Twilight said excitedly, bouncing off of the couch and landing near Kai. “All in good time,” Kai chuckled. “I don’t work until the evening and sneaking you there is something I still have to work out. He gave Twilight a look over and wondered just how he would do that. “I wonder if that’ll work…?” he thought out loud. “Tell you what, I have an idea.” Twilight looked confused as to what he was talking about. “I think a costume disguise might be best, but I need to go and get a few things. Will you be okay here by yourself for a about an hour?” Twilight nodded in response. “Yes, though I really wish I could go out and look around.” “I know and I’m sorry,” Kai replied. “I’ll find some way to make it up to you okay?” Twilight sighed but nodded once more in agreement. “Alright then, “I’ll take your word for it… but yu owe me mister!” she flashed a devious smile. Kai nodded and grabbed his keys and wallet. “Don’t open the door for anyone other than me okay?” he told her. “Though I hardly ever get visitors, you can never be too sure…” He unlocked the many slides and deadbolts on his door and opened it. “I should only be about an hour okay?” And with that he disappeared through the door and headed out towards Market City. He should be able to get what he needed from the markets in the basement levels. “I’m still waiting to wake up from this dream…” he muttered as he walked the streets of Sydney. A slight smile crept its way onto his face however. “But I guess it’s a pretty good dream though.” *** Princess Celestia walked into her throne room, her horn illuminating the darkness. She looked around the room and then walked up to her throne and searched it too. "Well that's odd," she murmured as she sighed and headed back to her bedchambers. "I could have sworn that I left my book and my snack in there..."