Sandpoint, Date Unknown (Presumably 24 September, 1000 SR), Morning
The face that appeared from behind the wooden door was that of one the locals, probably another one of those priest guys if his apparel was anything to go by. From what I could tell he was wearing a simple set of light blue robes, decorated here and there with strange patterns I couldn’t quite discern, sown from what appeared to be a gold-like thread. He also had a silver pendant hanging from a neck-chain, looking like a stylized representation of a butterfly with fine symbols on its wings. His face was that of a middle-aged stallion, or rather man; covered with a well trimmed short beard and supporting an elegantly looking mustache, this guy had a pleasant if not slightly wrinkled face, especially around his dark eyes, forming laugh lines. His hair, as well as his beard and mustache was quite dark in color, but the first gray hairs were slowly appearing amongst them, furthering the impression that this man was slowly getting old. All in all, the man looked like a nice enough guy.
The newcomer surveyed the dining room with his eyes, stopping only once he noticed Twilight and Trixie. A pleasant smile appeared on his face and he stepped in a bit more, allowing the doors behind him to stay slightly ajar.
“Ah, you two are still here, good.” He said, his voice a warm baritone and having a small cheer to it, like if he was happy about something. “I was hoping I would catch you before you left.”
Twilight looked slightly surprised by that and looked at the man more carefully, Trixie doing the same, but with much more suspicion in her eyes. I for one was confused by what was going on and only managed to look at the man with what must've been another of my dumb expressions. Finally, the silence was broken by the sound of Twi’s voice, sounding as surprised as she looked.
“Um… what’s the matter Father Zantus? Is something wrong?” Oh, so this is this whole ‘healer’ guy we were informed about. I was beginning to wonder when I would run into him. If I stayed with the girls I would’ve seen him earlier I bet. And speaking of them…
“Everything’s just fine miss Sparkle, I only wanted to inform you that a group of what appears to be your friends stumbled upon our humble church, but it seems you already know of this.” Here he shot me a quick glance, stopping for a moment to look at my hair for some reason. His words of course brought only more confusion to Twilight, who seemed not to get what was going on.
“A group of my friends?” She asked uncertainly, eyeing me in the process. “What do you mean by that? There’s only Spike here and…” She trailed off, sudden realization painted on her face. Father Zantus however took that as a prompting to continue.
“Well, aside from the little master over here there was a group of rather… interesting young ladies in need of healing. Nothing serious mind you, it was nothing I couldn’t handle.” He added as soon as he noticed Twilight looking worried at his words. “Best I let you see each other, no reason to keep friends ap… whoa!”
By the time Father Zantus was about to finish his sentence a bright pink blur ran right past him, almost knocking the poor guy on his back and making a beeline for Twilight. I couldn’t make out the finer features of what just ran straight for Twi, but to be honest –I didn’t need to. It was painfully obvious that it was Pinkie Pie, for only she could be that energetic and that enthusiastic, not to mention neck-breaking fast. My only hope was that Twi would survive the massive hug that was coming her way.
True to my predictions, Pinkie rammed full speed into Twilight, wrapping her hooves hands around Twi in a bone-crushing hug. The sheer force with which the pink mare tackled her almost made the two of them tumble to the floor, the chair tilting dangerously, balancing on two legs. As that didn’t happen however Pinkie could indulge Twilight in the pink mare’s favorite pastime.
Rapid Rambling Extravaganza.
“…I’m so, so, so super-duper happy to see you Twilight! We were all worried there for a second when we couldn’t find you, but then this funny guy with a bow stumbled upon us and we were like ‘hold it right there’ and he was like super silent so I talked to him and he seemed to be down so I tried to make him smile but he didn’t get my jokes and I was all sad for a moment, but then I turned that frown upside down and all that. And he was super nice too, he told us where to find you and how to get here and gave us those sunrods and this awesome dagger that Rarity’s walking with and all that. So we came here, talked with those funny looking guards and went here and let ol’ Pops here fix us up and then we came here and I was like ‘Twilight!’ and gave you a funarrific hug! Are you happy to see me, huh? Are you? Are you? You were gone for like seven chapters already and… are you gonna eat that? *om-no-nom*…”
I should’ve gotten used to Pinkie’s antics by now, but still –she catches me off guard all the time with the ease whit which she changed the subjects. In less than half a minute she managed to make putty out of my mind, and judging by Twilight's expression hers two. Long story short, she left all three of us, including Trixie, completely speechless, and in one human’s case looking at the pink mare with concern.
“Is that normal…?” He asked slowly and uncertainly, eyeing Pinkie warily. Before either of us could respond, an answer came from behind his back.
“Yeah, Ah wouldn’t worry ‘bout her. That’s Pinkie for ya.” AJ’s voice came from behind the half-open door and moments later she came from behind them herself. She looked fine if you ask me, better even than when I separated from the girls to look for Twi. She might've been generally okay after our stay in Tickwood Forest, but even so she had a few scratches here and there by the time we exited the woods. Now however it seemed like if every last one of those scratches disappeared, and if my eyes weren’t deceiving me it seemed that she even had the time to wash some grime off of her face. I have a sinking suspicion that Rarity had a hoof hand in this. Either way, the fact that AJ looked like if nothing happened to her whatsoever was slightly off-putting. Come to think of it, I seemed to be unable to locate the bump on Pinkie’s head from the farmpony’s blow. But that didn’t make any sense, something like that couldn’t just disappear all of a sudden.
By the time I made my observations Applejack entered the room and made way for the rest of the girls. Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy all came in through the door, all of them in a manner according to their nature, and each of them immediately went for Twilight, one by one embraced the completely flabbergasted by this point mare in relieved hugs. I easily noticed that RD’s side seemed to also be completely okay, something that I had a hard time comprehending. Just what the hay happened when I wasn’t around? Eh… no matter, I’m sure the girls are going to tell Twilight, I’ll learn it then.
The three mares joined Pinkie Pie with Twi and seemed to be too preoccupied with our resident brainiac to notice much of anything aside from her. The only one that didn’t immediately go for her was Applejack, who appeared to be talking with Father Zantus about something. Taking one last glance at Twilight’s stunned expression I walked up to the conversing duo, intent on figuring out what was actually going on.
“…again, Ah thank ya kindly for tha help. Ah dunno what we would do if ya couldn’t patch us up.”
“Don’t mention it dear, it was my pleasure.” Father Zantus waved AJ’s thanks off modestly, smiling at her warmly. He was definitely in a good mood. “Folks usually come to me when something ails them, I’m quite used to the work, and if I can alleviate someone’s pain than all the better. Desna knows how many cracked ribs I’ve mended.” He chuckled at that slightly, obviously an inside joke as Applejack seemed nonplussed by his words.
“Still, thanks pardner. We really appreciate it.” She finally said, sticking out her hand for what I assume was a hoof hand shake. The priest accepted it graciously, nodding slightly. It might be just me, but I think I saw AJ glance at the man’s butterfly pendant, her face momentarily shifting into an expression of wariness, but she quickly managed to hide it. Hm… Wonder what that was about.
“No problem.” My musings were interrupted by the priest’s voice. He seemed to be backing out of the room for some reason. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m needed outside. I still have to make sure everything is perfect for this year’s Swallowtail Festival. You all are invited of course. Feel free to use the personage as needed, but try not to roam around unsupervised.” At that point he shot a glance at me, winking good-naturedly which made me blushed abashed, having being caught red-handed. “I’ll leave Naffer to guide you around. See you girls at the festival!” And with that cheerful goodbye he strode out of the dining room, leaving the eight of us to our own devices. Strange man that one.
AJ looked for a moment at the now closed door behind which Father Zantus disappeared and breathed what I assumed was a sigh of relief. For whatever reason it appeared she was somewhat tense in his presence. I guess it must've had something to do with the way he tended their wounds, serious ones and scratches alike. Seriously, how did that guy manage to get rid of that gaping hole in RD’s side and Pinkie’s lump that quickly? Whatever he did must have shaken up Applejack something fierce.
“Ya could’a told us ya were gonna look for Twi, Spike.” AJ said after she shook her head to clear her thoughts. She looked at me, crossing her arms in front of her chest, and gave me a slight glare. “Ya gave us quite a scare ya know, for a moment there we thought sumthin’ happened to ya.”
“In a wooden corridor in a personage?” I retorted, rising an eyebrow. Seriously, somepony was worrying over nothing.
“Hey, don’t ya go balmin’ me for that. Try listenin’ ta Pinkie Pie once she’s on a roll an’ than try ta keep calm.” Ouch, good point. I remember she once almost convinced me a pony can spontaneously turn into something that she referred to only as GAK, whatever that is. “So, Ah see ya found Twi okay.” She changed the subject, for which I was quite grateful. Ponies turning into half-liquefied globs of goo were definitely not something I wanted to think about.
“Yeah, though I doubt she’s gonna be too happy to see you guys.” I admitted, prompting AJ to look at me with surprise.
“Whaddya mean by that?”
“Well, I think she was hoping that one of you girls would send word to the Princess about what happened so she could bring her back.” I reasoned. “She kinda can’t use magic in this new body…”
“Ah wouldn’t be so sure ‘bout that.” She muttered, glancing at the door once again. I was confused as to what she was talking about, but I deemed it unimportant for now.
I was about to ask Applejack what did I miss out on when something that I actually should've foreseen earlier happened. Before I was able to utter but a single word a loud “What the hay!” rang trough the dining room, making me lose my train of thought and look at the source of it. What I saw was the multicolored form of Rainbow Dash, pointing at something with her finger, a look of complete shock and incomprehension written on her face. Looking at what she was pointing at, the pieces of the puzzle fell into place.
She was pointing at an unamused Trixie, who looked like she wanted nothing more than for Rainbow to put that accusing digit where Celestia’s sun doesn’t shine.
“What… How… Why…” RD was having serious problems vocalizing her thoughts, sputtering. “What in the name of Celestia is she doing here?!”
Trixie raised an eyebrow at that in that infuriating way of hers.
“First the lizard and now the feather-brain. You sure pick complete morons for your minions, Sparkle.” Warning! Rainbow Dash rage levels reaching critical mass. Emergency discharge in… 3… 2… 1…
“Aaaiiiaaaggghh!!!” Letting out an animalistic cry, Rainbow Dash lunged at Trixie, in a manner of seconds closing the distance between the two of them and tackling the showpony full force to the ground, knocking her out of her chair. It was quite clear what she had in plan for the infuriating mare: she was going to wipe that smug smirk off of her face with her fists, and if she got lucky leave a bloody pulp in her wake. I admit, I actually had half the mind to let RD do just that –payback for calling me lizard-brain and just now a moron. Sadly, I was too good a guy for my own good, and apparently the rest of the girls also weren’t about to let something like that happen.
Before Rainbow was even able to land a single blow on the showpony’s face, Applejack decided to step in, running towards her and catching her raised fist before she could strike. Undeterred by that, RD prepared her other hand, only for it to end up caught in the same way. Only now noticing she was being held back Rainbow began struggling to break free, forcing AJ to tighten her grip and force her hooves hands behind her back in what I assumed was an improvised wrestling technique. By that point Rarity and I reached the slightly dazed silver-maned magician and began pulling her out of RD’s reach. The cyan mare wasn’t too happy about that, and began kicking and bucking, trying to break free of AJ’s hold and if possibly land a few hits on Trixie. She even partially succeeded in doing so; one or two of her kicks connecting with the showpony’s side and elicited strangled cries of pain from the mare. I think I saw a satisfied smirk cross Rarity’s face upon hearing them, but that must have been just my imagination. She couldn’t be that spiteful, right?
“Lemme go! I’m gonna beat her bragging face in! You hear that, oh Fake and Powerless!? I’m gonna buck your face so hard that you won’t be able to recognize yourself in a mirror!” Rainbow was definitely furious, yelling out threats along those lines and trying to break out of Applejack’s hold to no avail. Fortunately, AJ was not only keeping her from breaking free but also trying to talk some sense into the rainbow-maned mare.
“Calm down sugarcube, ya don’t really wanna do this.”
“Oh yeah?! That good for nothing braggart is the reason why we’re stuck here in the first place! Of course I wanna do this!”
“Sugar, we already talked ‘bout this. She ain’t the reason we’re here, it was somethin’ else.”
“You can’t be sure! She’s here, so that must mean that she had something to do with this! Now let me at her!”
“Oh for Pete’s sake… If ya don’t calm down this instant ya can forget ‘bout gettin’ any cider next Cider Season.” AJ was already fed up with Rainbow’s stubborn clams of our predicament being Trixie’s fault and rolled out the big guns. Hearing her threat RD momentarily ceased trashing and looked over her arm as best as she could at the farmpony holding her.
“You wouldn’t do that.” She said uncertainly, knowing full well that AJ was not somepony that liked casting words to the wind.
“Try my.” Was the only response she got from the farmpony, a look of fierce determination in her green eyes. Rainbow could only hang her head in defeat.
“Dang it! Ugh… fine, I won’t do anything to her. Now can you please let me go?” Well, that was easier than I thought. Rainbow must really love Apple Family Cider.
Applejack reluctantly released Rainbow from her grip, but stayed close to the cyan mare, just in case. RD in turn rubbed the parts of her body the farmpony held her down by, still glaring at Trixie who was slowly recovering from the shock of it all. Dash grumbled something under her breath, most probably another set of insults slash threats directed at the showpony, but the moment AJ cleared her throat expectantly she stopped and ostentatiously huffed, turning her back to the magician. Just what the hay did Trixie do to make Rainbow hate her so much? I mean apart from insulting her and apparently humiliating her in front of most of Ponyville?
I averted my gaze from the ponies involved in the incident, looking at the far end of the table at the rest, wondering why they didn’t help once RD went berserk. Twilight still seemed to be frozen in shock at seeing the girls; I think they actually broke her. Fluttershy obviously hid behind the closest thing she could find once the commotion started –in this case it was behind Twi. As for Pinkie Pie…
“Hello!” I whipped around with a start, scared half to death by that. I don’t know when or how, but Pinkie at some point joined us, and right now was crouching beside Trixie, looking at her with great, blue, unblinking eyes and with an ear-splitting grin plastered on her face. Truth be told, it was unnerving as hay.
Trixie, who was still dazed by what happened moments ago managed only the most basic of replies. “Huh?”
“Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie! You’re Trixie, right? Or is it The Great and Powerful Trixie? That would be a silly name, long-a-riffic, like Waggleton P. Tallyicker. I saw you in Ponyville, you know, when you came to town in that super-duper-awesome cart? You were all like ‘aha’ and everypony was like ‘oh’, and I went like *insert-dramatic-gasp* and I had this funarrific idea to throw you a ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ Party. But then I got teleported by a Solar and met Spike, and we were all like Sherclop Spike and Dr. Pie and tried to make head or tails of this glowing winged thingy from chapter one and I got this mega-hyper-fun idea to make a double ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ party, so we would have two guests of honor. And there would be games and dances and punch and cake and you like cake, don’t you? Who am I kidding, of course you like cake, who doesn’t, duh! What flavor do you like? I like strawberry cakes with chocolate icing, but then again, I like most flavors. The Cakes, not the pastries but my landlords, they own Sugarcube Corner, that’s like the best place in whole Ponyville. Did I mention I know everypony in Ponyville? I love making new friends, especially if they are interesting ponies from the wide, wide world of Equestria, and I bet the author is just trolling the viewers with how ridiculously long he made my rambling session this time…”
If Trixie didn’t snap from her daze earlier, it was clear she had by now. Pinkie’s rambling, as unfriendly as it may sound, was enough to make even a dead pony rise from the grave and run for the hills. I should know; I was subjected to it multiple times by now, and I never ever was able to keep up with her. The con mare herself wasn’t fearing much better either, as evident by the look in her eyes. She was gazing at Pinkie who was hanging over her with a mix of surprise, weariness and poorly concealed incomprehension. She was slowly inching away from her, as if afraid that she would suddenly get violent for no apparent reason. Yeah, right; as if Pinkie Pie would ever hurt a fly…
I was seriously beginning to wonder if the girls just decided to use the party pony as a sort of non-physical torture device on the magician. None of them seemed to keen on pacifying Pinkie anytime soon, and looking at Trixie it was clear that she was slowly losing it from listening to her insane monologue. Truth be told however, I wasn’t about to help her out of it either. Let’s just say this was an acceptable payback for insulting me.
Sadly, good things never last long, and it was true in this case as well. As Pinkie was still rambling on and on, bringing Trixie to the verge of a mental breakdown, Fluttershy finally gathered the courage to leave the relative safeness of Twilight’s back and take stock of what actually happened. Her blue eyes quickly fell on the form of the con mare, now crawling backwards and away from the pink menace, and her caring nature went into overdrive. In a flash she was right beside Trixie, effectively cutting off her escape route, and with a worried expression she began looking for any signs of injury on her.
“Oh my goodness, are you okay?” She asked surprisingly loudly (almost normal talking volume for normal ponies). “Did Rainbow Dash hurt you? I-I’m sure she’s sorry for that.” I think I’ve heard a faint ‘No I’m not’ from the cyan mare at that, but I can’t be sure. “D-Do you need any help? I know a thing or two about medicine, I’m sure I can help. If you don’t mind that is…”
Trixie’s eyes darted from one pony to the other, utter confusion painted on her face. She must've realized that she was being sandwiched between two mares that in her nomenclature would be called ‘Sparkle’s minions’, and that at least one of them was clearly insane. Slight paranoia after being assaulted by RD prevented her also from accepting Fluttershy’s help, expecting to be double-crossed if she accepted any help, or at least I think that was the reason behind her next actions. Speaking of which…
“Would you bucking shut up already?! Trixie is sick and tired of your nonsensical rambling, you pink bedlamite! Do you seriously believe that the Great and Powerful Trixie cares about your preferences when it comes to pastries? No, that she does not! So do Trixie a favor and shut up!” Well, at least she didn’t bottle it all up. Who knows what would have happened to her psyche if she didn’t vent her frustration like that. Besides, Pinkie Pie seemed completely obvious to the fact she was rudely ‘asked’ to be quiet and called some rather derogatory things. If anypony could take an insult to the face and be completely unfazed by it, it was Pinkie Pie.
Unless you insulted sugar-based products. Celestia forbid you do that.
Once Trixie vented her frustration on the still creepily smiling Pinkie Pie, she turned sharply to Fluttershy. The yellow pegasus squeaked in fright and took a step back once she met the showpony’s gaze.
“And you…” She started in a low voice, glaring at ‘Shy. “You can take your concerns and shove them… shove them… em…” Suddenly she trailed off, looking at the covering form of Fluttershy, who apparently wanted nothing more than to run away as quickly as possible with a weird expression on her face. I wasn’t sure what exactly happened, nor did I understand what Trixie was saying once she started muttering something under her breath, but one thing was for certain –she wasn’t going to finish her insult.
Finally, after a moment or two of just looking at the covering form of Fluttershy and muttering to herself Trixie decided to speak up. She took a deep breath, let out a sigh and fixed her eyes on the butter-yellow mare, her expression void of any emotion.
“Trixie does not require medical assistance, she is okay.” She stated calmly while rising to her feet. She was obviously lying, the way she favored one of her sides was clear that RD’s kicks reached their marks good, but for some odd reason she tried not to show that. “Now, if you would be so kind as to step away from Trixie; you are invading her personal space.”
With another squeak Fluttershy backed out of Trixie’s reach, avoiding eye contact at all costs. Still, it went better than expected –for a moment there I thought she would begin insulting poor ‘Shy as she did with Pinkie Pie. Fortunately, I (and the rest of the girls, if Rainbow’s, AJ’s and Rarity’s clenched fists and ready stances were anything to go by) was pleasantly surprised by this turn of events. Yet again Fluttershy’s undeniable charm and sheer adorableness proved to be able to tame even the wildest of beasts.
Once Trixie was back on her feet an impasse of sorts had occurred, the magician glaring daggers at Rainbow Dash as the mare in question was giving her own stink-eye to the con artist. Tension between the two of them was so high that you could almost feel it in the air. The fact the others, especially Rarity for some reason and AJ to a lesser extent were keeping their eyes on Trixie as if half-expecting her to try something funny definitely didn’t help.
Speaking of funny, Pinkie Pie as per usual thought this was some kind of game and was desperate to join in, choosing to stare at Fluttershy of all ponies as if her life depended on it. Long story short, Flutters was creeped out only after a few seconds and was trying to hide behind her pink hair, voicing a weak protest that went completely unnoticed by the hyperactive pony.
Seriously, this was getting ridiculous. If this was going to last any longer, than I swear on Celestia’s Beard I’m gonna blow a gasket. We didn’t go through all that jazz with Tickwood forest and that grumpy guard for something as stupid and childish as this!
…Boy, does it sound weird to actually think like somepony responsible.
I was silently fuming, working up my rage in an attempt to shock the girls out of this farce (worked well enough the last time) when finally something happened. The almost complete silence, broken only by Fluttershy’s soft protests and Pinkie’s silent giggles was shattered to a million pieces by the voice of none other than Twilight, who said something that only a pony with a superior intellect like hers could come up with.
“Wha?!?!?!” Just as I said –pure eloquence and elegance at its finest.
Twi’s cry was loud enough to startle the girls out of their revere, making ‘Shy almost jump out of her skin and Pinkie Pie proclaim victory in a game only she knew she was playing. All eyes fell on Twilight’s form, taking in her current state. And considering I knew her the longest of them all, I could with relative safeness assume what was her current mental state. And let me tell you –it was not good.
I was able to pick up the symptoms of a panic attack setting in. Twilight’s mane hair started to randomly stick out at odd places and her eyes were shifting rapidly from side to side; I think they even shrunk a bit, as more lavender could be seen in place of the giant pools of black. What was most noticeable was that she stood up from her chair abruptly, making it fall over to the floor with a loud smash and began pacing so quickly that even Rainbow Dash would have had a hard time keeping up with her. The fact she was beginning to speak to herself only confirmed my suspicions that Twi was going through a mental breakdown… again. Hope this time it’ll be easier than the last. I doubt a battalion of Royal Guards is somewhere nearby to stop her.
“This is bad. This is really, really, really, really bad.” Twilight was repeating over and over again, shooting us distressed, panicked even looks. “This can’t be happening, it just can’t!”
“Em… Sugarcube?” AJ was the first to speak. She looked at Twi worriedly, concern evident in her green orbs. “Y’all‘right? Everythin’ okay?”
“Nothing is okay anymore!!!” In response to her concerns Applejack got a furious Twilight to the face. Twi was hyperventilating and visibly shaking, evidence that she was going to break down completely any minute now. Just to be on the safe side I began rummaging around the room in search of anything that could work as a makeshift paper bag. “This wasn’t supposed to happen! You and Spike should've stayed back home and send word to the Princess, not follow me! You shouldn’t even be here!”
The girls exchanged worried glances, not sure how to react to Twilight’s behavior. It was the first time they’ve seen her in such a state, and as a result didn’t have the slightest clue how to approach her. I of course was more experienced in the matter, and as such I was already well underway with a plan to calm her down. Now, where do they keep sedatives around here…
“This is all just so horribly wrong.” I heard Twilight lament, getting closer to completely breaking down with each passing sentence. “I didn’t want anything like this to happen. I hoped I was the only one sent here, so that you could send word to the Princess so she may help me back. But now… now we’re stuck here for good. I can’t send word to the Princess, Spike can’t breathe fire, none of us are even in our own bodies… This is just so messed up!”
“Um… Twilight?” The quiet voice of Fluttershy brought my attention from my search. Looking at her, I spotted that she was slowly and, true to her name, shyly approaching the distraught unicorn, a concerned expression on her face. “Um… if it’s okay with you, I just wanted to say that… em… that we’re not angry at you. We know it’s not your fault and that if you could help it you wouldn’t put us in a situation like this. So…” She didn’t finish, instead wrapping Twi in a tight, warm hug.
At first I wasn’t sure how that would work out; last time, as I’ve already stated, Twilight needed to be held down against her will by a battalion of the Royal Guard, and even then it was only thanks to Princess Celestia’s personal intervention that Twi calmed down. I was half expecting her to break out of the hug and go on a destructive rampage, turning deep green in the process and losing most of her mental capabilities (I definitely read too much comics). Instead however, Twi, who at first went rigid began to slowly loosen up and after a moment or two returned the hug, if not a bit shakily. Encouraged by Fluttershy’s success, the rest of the girls soon joined in, forming a group hug around the distraught mare. The only ones not included in it was Trixie, for obvious reasons, and I.
“Does this happen often?”
“Enough that I’ve gotten used to it.” I responded not thinking. Only after a moment did I realize, that it was Trixie that asked me that, and that she was looking at the girls with what I assumed was a ‘what the hay just happened’ kind of expression. What shocked me even more was that she was actually being civil, though that might have been the effect of her being utterly confused.
The group hug lasted maybe a couple of seconds, but its effects were easily noticeable. Twilight seemed calmer than moments before, and her hair seemed to go back to normal, losing its frizzled look. Once the girls released Twi from their hold, she stood there, taking a series of deep, calming breaths and looked at our friends, smiling slightly and blushing from embarrassment.
“Sorry about that.” She said sheepishly. “I… I guess all this just took a toll on me. It’s not every day you wake up in another’s body.”
“You can say that again.” Rainbow nodded earnestly, glancing behind her on instinct. She definitely missed her wings.
“Tell me Twilight, do you happen to have some sort of idea how we could possibly get back home, or at the very least back to the way we normally look?” This time it was Rarity that decided to ask the obvious question. She did look a bit dejected at her own, two-legged form. “As much as being able to mingle with another culture and gather ideas for new dress designs is rewarding, I am not too keen on spending too much time away from our home, and I do believe that I speak on behalf all of us in this matter.” The nods she received in response were answer enough.
Rarity’s words of course prompted Twilight to sadden, once again remembering she was stripped of her biggest talent in this body. She took a hold of herself however and explained everything she knew to the best of her abilities. Most of it I tuned out, already knowing it from my previous conversation with Twi, and apparently so did Trixie, opting for glaring a hole in the back of the head of one Rainbow Dash instead. Something told me this was going to be interesting.
I was brought back to attention when Twilight moved to another topic of her explanation: her plan of escape, and why the girls’ and my presence here was such a setback.
“…So you see, with Spike here and unable to breathe fire I can’t ask the Pr… I mean I can’t ask my teacher for help.” Seriously, Twilight was making a fool of herself now. Considering she all but proclaimed she was Celestia’s protégé during her mental breakdown, Trixie most probably already knew, and this was no secret. “I thought that I could count on one of you girls to send her a letter and inform her about this situation, but as it’s perfectly clear you can’t do that while stuck here with me. And I seriously doubt the citizens of Ponyville will be much help –they may report that we mysteriously disappeared to the authorities, but I doubt anypony aside from Princess Celestia herself can really help us. You know ponies in the right places and they don’t, so we can forget about sending word there…”
Twilight trailed off, her eyes widening suspiciously, and a look of shocked realization creeping on her face. The girls exchanged surprised and in more than one case worried glances and began trying to get a response from Twi, sadly to no avail. She became completely unresponsive for some reason and that frightened look wasn’t helping any. Finally, after a good moment of prompting a response my companion seemed to snap out of whatever she was in. Problem is, her hair once again began looking frizzled, another panic attack coming to life.
“No…” She said softly, shaking her head slightly. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no…” By that point she began pacing and with each of the repeated ‘no’ she was becoming louder and louder. “This is not good, not good at all. How am I going to explain this?”
“Explain what exactly, dear?” Rarity asked hesitantly. In response, Twilight only quickened her pace.
“Oh, she’s going to be so disappointed in me! I can already tell she’s going to be furious… what if she decides to terminate them?”
“Terminate what, sugarcube?” This time it was Applejack, who stepped in the path Twilight was walking and tried to stop her. Twi faced her and with the most serious expression I’ve ever seen on her face and:
“My advanced studies Applejack, that’s what.” She said in a no nonsense voice, making me faceclaw(?) and confusing the poor farmpony.
“Huh?”
“I'm required to send a message every week pertaining my research on the Magic of Friendship.” I think I saw Trixie mouth ‘Magic of Friendship’ with a raised eyebrow, but I ignored it. “I have a strict schedule and I can’t just let it slip no matter what the situation. If I don’t send a Friendship Report in the following few days I’ll become… *gasp* tardy!”
Only thanks to the years spent in Twilight’s company was I able to hold back a snort at that statement. Tardy was definitely one of my favorite words of all time, in Twi’s voice it had that extra funny ring to it. Sadly, she only used it when it came to important, school/research-related matters, and it was one of the symptoms of her worrying too much. Unfortunately however, the girls didn’t know that, and Pinkie being her normal, cheerful self began giggling like mad once she heard that word escape Twi’s mouth.
“Oh Twilight, that was a good one!” The party pony exclaimed cheerfully once she stopped laughing. She didn’t notice the angry blush on Twi’s cheeks. “I love saying funny words like that. Do you know any more? Oh! Do you know the word kumquat? I didn’t even made it up myself, it’s a real thing!”
“Pinkie, this is no laughing matter!” Twilight snapped at her. That got the pink mare’s attention; Pinkie looked at Twi with wide eyes expectantly, waiting for her to continue. “If I don’t send my report before the deadline, Celestia will think I’m not taking my studies seriously, and if she thinks that, than she will give me a test to check if I really am studying. What if there will be a question I can’t answer somewhere in there? What if I don’t pass? What if…”
By then I had enough of Twilight’s constant worrying. For an unbelievably intelligent mare she could be so dense at times. I sighed deeply, trying to calm my nerves as much as possible (if I was angry I wouldn’t get anywhere with this), and approached the panicking unicorn turned human (or elf I suppose) and shook her as best I could with our height difference.
“Twilight, snap out of it!” I shouted at her. Twi looked confused for a moment and then looked down at me. Good, we’ve made eye contact, it'll make things easier on my side. “Listen Twilight, you’re worrying too much over this. I know, you want to explode in my face right now and say that I don’t have the slightest idea what I’m talking about, but listen to me, okay? Okay?” I repeated, shaking her a bit for emphasis. She nodded slowly, so I continued.
“I know you don’t want to disappoint Princess Celestia, I really do, but first off –we can’t send word to her from here, so Friendship Reports are stuck here as well, and secondly –this may work to our advantage.”
“It can?” It wasn’t Twilight who asked that question, but Rarity. She was looking at me with a slightly surprised expression, but managed to hide it well behind her lady-like mask. She wasn’t the only one confused by my words however.
“How can Twi not sending her reports to the Princess possibly work to our advantage? “ Rainbow asked, trying to figure my words out. I grinned in response –this was my five minutes and I was determined to make it count.
“Think about it: if we’re stuck here for a longer period of time, then we’ll miss up on more than one deadline.” At the mention of this Twilight flinched like if physically struck. “The more deadlines we miss on, the more it will concern Princess Celestia. She’ll then probably send somepony to check up on you, and once they discover that we’re missing the Princess will organize a search party, or investigate our disappearance herself. She’ll sooner or later find out that we were teleported somewhere, and if we’re lucky, she’ll bring us back.”
The girls began murmuring between themselves at this point, most of them seeing what I was going at. Sadly, Twilight didn’t look too happy at my suggestion, though she didn’t outright state that this was a bad idea. I suspect that she actually saw my point, but she didn’t like the method. Either way, her hair was becoming less frizzled, so I was happy about that –means she’s calming down again.
“I don’t know Spike.” Twilight began slowly, looking at me doubtfully. “This all depends on something I’m not exactly comfortable with. What if the Princess decides that despite being stuck somewhere outside of Equestria I should've continued my studies?”
“Simple: you continue your studies.” I responded, crossing my arms over my chest and grinning smugly. I was really proud of myself right there. Still, Twi looked unconvinced, so I needed to press the matter. “There’s no reason for you not to continue your studies. Hay, you can even write your Friendship Reports and store them until we get back. That way you’ll show the Princess that you didn’t slack off while stuck here and that you learned something about friendship. I’ll even send them in one go if you’d like.”
That seemed to appease her for the time being. Twilight shifted her gaze from me and looked outside the window, a thoughtful expression on her face. She stayed like that for almost a full minute, before she snapped out of it and looked at me again, this time fiery determination burning in her eyes.
“You’re right Spike, the Princess should understand. She ruled over Equestria for thousands of years, I’m sure she’ll understand that I just couldn’t send them sooner, especially if I send something more than just my Friendship Reports along with it.” I blinked at that and looked at Twi uncertainly.
“Em… What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about studying the culture of the creatures we’re turned into of course!” She almost jumped at that, exclaiming it with so much enthusiasm that it made Pinkie Pie shed tears of pride while saying ‘she grows up so fast’. I on the other hoof looked at her nonplussed, not exactly getting what she was so happy about. Then again, she was most happy when she had to study something really difficult, so that must have had something to do with it.
“You want to study the culture of humans?” I asked, just to be sure. I got a really enthusiastic nod from Twilight in response, which made me roll my eyes. Typical Twi right there.
“This is going to be so interesting! I’ll get to know first hoof about creatures of the oldest pony myths! Who knows, maybe even the science society of the University of Canterlot will be interested in my finds. Oh… maybe I’ll get to give a lecture about what I learn here! That would be a dream come true…”
“…It’s frightening how much like Pinkie Pie can Twilight act.” Rainbow commented to no one, her eyes fixed uncertainly on the unicorn in question. The girls minus Pinkie nodded silently in agreement.
“Twilight, dear, aren’t you forgetting about something?” Rarity tried to catch her attention, unfortunately having no success in that matter. Twi was still rambling to herself, and she even started to skip while pacing excitably around the room. I was half expecting her to begin to prance around repeating ‘yes, yes, yes…’ over and over.
“…We’ll need lots of ink, not to mention parchment. Lots and lots of parchment. Do they even have that around here? Oh, they better have. What sort of civilization would this be if they didn’t even have the basic skill of writing down their…”
“Twilight!!!” I almost jumped out of my scales skin once I heard that. Apparently seeing that Rarity had problems with gaining Twi’s attention Dash decided to help out, which of course consisted of her hollering her name on top of her lungs. It did serve its purpose at least –Twilight snapped out of her planning frenzy and looked questioningly at RD, who in turned pointed at Rarity.
“You do know that you didn’t have to do that, Rainbow Dash?” The fashionista scolded the rainbow pegasus, after which she turned to Twi and cleared her throat in a dignified manner. “Yes, now… Twilight. Didn’t you by chance forget about something so important that one would even go as far as to call it a pressing matter, hm? Something that affects all of us personally?”
Twi blinked a couple of times at the question, not sure what Rarity meant by it. Thankfully, her ridiculously fast thinking prevented her from making a fool of herself, and after a few short moments it finally clicked. She gave Rarity a look that I knew all too well –a look titled ‘are you seriously asking me that question?’
“I expected at least you to understand the situation we’re in, Rarity.” Twilight started, her tone of voice heavy on the disappointed side. “We’re not ponies anymore, we’re not unicorns anymore. Without our horns, we can’t do any magic, and I seriously doubt that there is a mundane method of returning to Equestria, not to mention to the way we looked earlier. And try as we might, we won’t be able to use magic as humans or whatever we’re actually turned into. They’re a completely magicless species.” She finished with an air of finality to it, nodding to herself.
For a moment I was confused as to why did Rarity ask that question in the first place. We already knew that none of our unicorns could use magic, so it was pointless to talk about it. Still, Rarity insisted, so it must have had some kind of reason behind it.
As I looked at our friends, searching for an answer to my questions, I noticed that the girls huddled together and seemed to discuss something amongst themselves in hushed tones. Even Pinkie Pie was taking a part of that quiet discussion, though she looked more like a vedette, glancing at Twilight at odd intervals. I looked at them quizzically, as did Twilight, and even Trixie, who for the most part tried to look as disinterested as possible was stealing glances at the group, probably trying to figure out if they were plotting something against her or something. After a good moment of that hushed conversation Twi couldn’t take it anymore.
“Can somepony please tell me what’s going on here?!” She asked, clearly annoyed that she was kept out of the loop. “Why are you acting so odd all of a sudden? What’s with the whispering?”
The girls looked at one another again, and nodded collectively. Rarity stepped forward and approached Twilight, a serious expression on her face.
“What would you say, dear, if I were to tell you that humans really aren’t as magicless beings as you make them be?” She asked what I assumed was a completely unrelated, not to mention rhetorical question. Twilight seemed to be thinking the same thing, because she stifled a small laugh and rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, right. As if a creature without a horn or magic in their blood could control magic.” She laughed for a moment, though that laugh died down as time passed. Rarity’s look did not change a bit from her earlier seriousness. “You’re serious, aren’t you?”
“As serious as I ever was, darling.” Was Rarity’s response.
“How?”
“We’re not sure ourselves, sugarcube.” Applejack joined the conversation, a rather spooked expression on her face. Apparently the prospect of something other than a unicorn using magic was uncomfortable for her. Truth be told, I was feeling the same way –how did that even work? “Ya see, when we were herded to dem whole Father Zantus fellar, the guy did sum kinda examination on us and took note of our injuries…”
“You look just fine to me.” Twilight interrupted, looking at the girls confusedly. Seriously, did she not notice the state of their clothing right now, or the fact the side of Rainbow's shirt was torn and bloodied? Either way, Twi looked at them, not understanding what they were talking about.
“Well yeah, now we look okay. Pops really is a hay of an awesome doctor. Strange guy that one, but he’s cool.” It was Rainbow's time to add her two bits. Twilight looked at her nonplussed however.
“What do you mean by that? What kind of injuries could he had possibly taken care of to such an extent that you look a-okay to me?” Twi with every passing moment was getting more and more confused. Seeing all this I grinned mischievously. This was too good an opportunity…
“Oh, nothing much apparently.” I started innocently, beginning to count down on my claws fingers. “Let’s see now: there were scraps, some bumps, shallow cuts, a lump the size of my fist on Pinkie’s forehead and an open wound from a boar’s tusk on Rainbow Dash’s side. Did I miss anything?”
Twilight looked at me like if I was pulling her leg, which only made this even more funny in my opinion. And speaking of comical, Pinkie Pie must've realized what I was trying to do, because she played along, tapping her chin in thought before speaking up.
“I think that’s all Spike. Though I’m still a bit sad that it wasn’t actually a growing unicorn horn. Can you imagine how much fun I would have if I could use magic?” Truth be told, I did imagine just that. Only two words could sum up what I saw in my imagination: NEVER. AGAIN.
“Okay, now I know this is a sham.” Twi stated with an air of finality. “This couldn’t happen, you would have to be hospitalized for a couple of days to be up and running again. It’s all just a stupid joke… it’s not a joke, isn't it?” She finished once she noticed the looks the rest of the girls were giving her.
“We would never joke around about something as horrible as that, Twilight. You should know better than to assume something like that.” It was Fluttershy who decided to speak up, and she did that with a surprisingly stern voice. One would go as far as to say she was scolding Twi, which in itself was absurd enough. Well, this place sure as hay brought the strangest things out of everypony, that’s for sure.
My companion seemed a bit ashamed at her own assumptions, but that was quickly erased from her face by a look of confusion. She looked thoughtful for a moment, as if analyzing what she already knew, and after a moment or two she spoke up, looking clearly lost.
“I don’t get it. How’s that possible? Even with unicorn magic, healing spells can do only so much in terms of treating injuries, and from your description I can’t even begin to see how it was possible that Father Zantus managed to patch you girls up so good in such short notice. How did he do that?”
At this point it was pretty obvious to whoever was looking at Trixie that she was more than just a little bit interested in what was currently being discussed. Leaning slightly towards the girls she stood in her place she was eagerly awaiting the response from the girls. As much as I wanted to point that out and ruin her chance to learn how to apparently do magic as a non-unicorn, I couldn’t bring myself to do that. It probably had something to do with the fact that in that particular moment she had the exact same expression on her face as Twilight –an expression of unbridled curiosity.
I was half expecting Rarity, as the only unicorn present at that particular event to begin to explain what happened when I was gone, but to my surprise it wasn’t her that began. Instead it was AJ of all ponies who started.
“As Ah said earlier, the Father fellar did examine us an’ took note of our injuries, all the while mutterin’ sumthin’ under his breath. Can’t be sure what he was babbling ‘bout though, he spoke too softly. Either way, once he was done with it, things started ta get all strange like.”
“Strange? In what way?” Twilight asked, curious.
“Well, the guy pulled that silver butterfly pendant of his for some reason.” Rainbow answered for AJ, furrowing her brows in thought. “Come to think of it, he was kinda holding it for the entire time he was examining us. Like if it was calming him or something…”
“Yeah, well, RD’s right there Twi, he did pull that bauble of his an’ raised it over his head, so that all could see it. He then said somethin’ along tha lines o’ ‘may the soft glow of Desna shine upon ye’ or somethin’ like that. Ah was beginnin’ ta think that this was some kind o’ weird joke Ah wasn’t gettin’, but then all of a sudden the room was filled with this strange silvery glow.”
“Strange silvery glow?” Twi repeated, scratching her head in confusion. “I don’t know any spell that give off that kind of side-effect, aside from the teleportation spell, but that’s more of a flash then a glow. What happened next?”
“Well, that’s where it really started to get bizarre, darling.” It was time for Rarity to begin explaining, seeing that she had a bit more knowledge in regards of magic than the rest and could probably explain things better than them. “You see, once this glow began emanating, it became clear it was coming from that lovely pendant of his, just as if it was a horn of a unicorn and was affecting everything in the room. None of us of course felt any type of vertigo of being lifted in the air via magic, so I immediately assumed that it was some kind of magic with a more specific function, like my gem detecting spell. Then, and that’s what I was referring to as bizarre, the light from the glow seemed to move on its own accord, ‘slithering’ through the air towards us and seeping into us through our cuts and other wounds. It was a really odd sensation I must admit, not uncomfortable of course, but most definitely odd.”
“And let me guess: after the ‘light’ entered your bodies your wounds suddenly began rapidly healing.” I stated more than asked, already seeing there this story was going.
“Yes, quite. Thought I must confess, I cringed a bit seeing the process taking hold on Rainbow Dash.” Rarity admitted, shivering slightly. Curious, I glanced at the pegasus in question, and she just shrugged.
“What didja expect from Rarity? She cringes at the sight of a paper cut, let alone a full-blown hole in the side.” She answered in such a way that it was impossible not to notice the pride in her voice. She probably decided to think about her wound in the categories of ‘why I’m awesome’ now that it was gone. “Seriously guys, the way that wound just began closing in front of my eyes, fresh flesh just growing out of nowhere, it was so awesome.”
“Flesh growing from nowhere?” Twilight repeated as if uncertain if she heard that right. At the eager nod courtesy of Rainbow Dash she continued. “That’s some really weird and surprisingly powerful magic you girls described here. Most spells back home only mend small cuts, and that’s only because it hastens the natural process of regeneration in the skin. And then there’s the fact it affected all of you at once. That’s not something you see every day…” She trailed off, deep in thought. I was genuinely surprised how calm Twi was actually approaching the matter, just as if she was readily accepting the fact that something that shouldn’t be able to do magic apparently just did it. It was almost as if she was a completely different mare.
Twilight wasn’t the only one thinking deeply on the matter at hoof, as it became apparent once I turned my attention from my companion. Apparently, none other than “the Great and Powerful” mare herself was lost in thought as well, furrowing her brows and looking absentmindedly at the floor. Admittedly, I think she wasn’t thinking about the exact same thing as Twi did. I got the distinct impression she was scheming something right now, and whatever it was, it wouldn’t end well for us. Hope whatever she’s planning will end up backfiring in her…
“Prosthetic horns.” …what? Seriously, what did just happen? One moment I was more than certain that Trixie was planning something nasty for us, and now for no apparent reason she says something so random that Pinkie Pie would be proud? Did Rainbow Dash hit her on the head when I wasn’t looking or something?
Apparently I wasn’t the only one that was surprised by that random outburst. Most of the girls looked at the con mare with looks ranging from confused to hateful (at least RD’s was), and in Pinkie’s case with a ‘hey, that was my line’ kind of look. Even Twilight seemed to have heard that despite her being deep in thought and looked at her. Of course, being the center of attention was something Trixie thrived on, and in but a few seconds she adopted a more dignified pose and pointed her nose at the ceiling proudly.
“What in tarnation’ are ya talkin’ ‘bout now?”AJ was the first to ask the question on everypony’s mind. Rainbow was close to saying something of her own, most probably insult the magician, but Trixie was quicker.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie doubts that a puny mind of a farmpony could even begin to comprehend the complexity of magical theory or unicorn biology or medicine, but she supposes that there won’t be any harm in showing how well educated Trixie really is. Hopefully at least some ponies will get what Trixie is talking about.” She announced in that annoying way of hers, making AJ grit her teeth. Before she was able to retort however, the magician began her explanation.
“As all well know, unicorn magic is siphoned through a horn on the forehead of said unicorn. It serves as a conduit for the inner magic of a pony to manifest as an outward, quasi-physical force, able to manipulate the surrounding matter on a molecular level.” She was using that kind of terminology to confuse ponies on purpose, I know it. “It also serves as a valve, controlling the exact amount of raw magical energy used, and as a processing center, reconfiguring that raw energy into useful and controllable effects referred to commonly as spells. If a unicorn horn is whole and healthy, its owner can use magic with relative ease. Of course some are much better at it, as for example the Great and Powerful Trixie, but that is only because of her own natural predispositions as well as her cutie mark. However, if a horn is in some way damaged it can create disastrous effects.
“History knows of certain instances, when a simple damaged horn and a unicorn that ignored it and tried to use magic were the causes of massive damage, and in some cases even death. Depending on the nature of the wound on the horn itself, magic channeled through them can trigger certain reactions. For example, a stallion named Green Leaf in the year 874 SE, who apparently had his horn cracked could not control his levitation spell while transporting his friends over a ravine and one of them, the mayor of Manehattan if Trixie recalls it correctly, fell to his untimely demise. A mare by the name Sweet Symphony in the year 966 SE, having the tip of her horn chipped off attempted to cast a spell that apparently was meant to animate an orchestra-worth of instruments as part of her one-mare symphony act in the Los Pegasus Concert Hall. Instead, bolts of fire shot out of her horn in random directions, setting ablaze the Concert Hall and injuring hundreds of spectators, dozens of them lethally. Sweet Symphony herself perished during that incident, and the Concert Hall needed to be razed to the ground because of the damage it took during the fire. Instances of complete loss of a horn are rare however, and the effects of such injury aren’t as spectacular as the ones Trixie described earlier, but they are none the less frightening, at least for the interested unicorns. Complete loss of all magical abilities, and considering Earth Pony ‘magic’ is completely different from the unicorn one, ponies that suffered the removal of their horn are forever crippled.
“Now, during the last fifty or so years the doctors form the Canterlot Medical University were trying to create a working, fully functional prosthetic unicorn horn. Although they were unsuccessful in developing one, they were able to create half-prosthetic overlays on damaged horns, limiting the chance of accidental magical misfires close to null, and…”
"Oh for the love of... Could you get to the important bit already?!" She was interrupted by Rainbow's peeved yet utterly bored voice. "Nopony cares about the history lesson. Besides, I bet most of it you made up, like the thing with the Ursa." She added smugly.
For a moment I was almost certain that Trixie would respond in an utterly undignified way, but she surprised me once more. Staying calm and collected, she looked at Rainbow with a small smirk appearing on her face. "It appears that somepony has problems with processing large amounts of information at once. It really makes Trixie feel so, so sorry for you. She can't imagine how hard it must be, to live with a brain the size of a walnut."
"My brain is not the size of a walnut." RD growled out through gritted teeth, sending the mother of all glares at Trixie.
"Oh, my mistake. Trixie should have realized that she's dealing with a pea-brain." Came the venomous replay of the showpony.
"You're the only one with a pea-brain here you fraud!"
"Fraud, really creative. But one shouldn't really expect anything groundbreaking from somepony with room-temperature IQ."
This back and forth between the two would no doubt last for quite some time, or at least until RD finally lost it and decided to get physical about it again if it wasn't for Twilight. She really didn't want this to escalate any further and most definitely didn't want to spend the next few hours explaining to Father Zantus why there was an elf-shaped whole in his wall.
“Quiet you two, you’re not making this any easier.” Twi intervened calmly, or as calmly as the situation let her. Rainbow Dash wasn’t so keen on letting the matter drop and was flinging insults left and right. Trixie just glared in response at Twilight, muttering something under her breath, but what came as a total surprise to me she ceased her taunting. The satisfied grin on her face told me all I needed to know –she achieved her goal and made Rainbow Dash look like a fool.
“Rainbow Dash, calm down!” Twilight tried again, this time more forcefully. Again, RD completely ignored her, her undivided attention strictly on the smug-looking magician. “Rainbow, stop it this instance!” She tried again, to no avail.
“Maybe I can help Twilight?” Pinkie Pie suggested, appearing right beside Twi. Twilight in turn let out an exasperated huff and looked at the pink ball of energy with resignation.
“If you have any idea how to calm Rainbow down than by all means.” She stepped aside, letting Pinkie do her thing.
Pinkie stood in front of the still struggling Rainbow Dash and looked at her for a moment, furrowing her enormous eyebrows in thought and scratching her chin contemplative. Moments later she snapped her fingers (don’t know how she figured how to do that so quickly) and began to rummage with her hand in her hair of all places. After a moment or two she pulled out from it something that looked like a picture of some kind. I caught a glimpse of it and noticed a surprising amount of blue on it, as well as at least one lightning bolt.
“Hay Dashie, look what I have!” She called out with a sing-song voice, dangling the picture in front of Dash. “It’s a picture of the Wonderbolts, limited edition, and it’s signed by Spitfire too. You know you want it.”
“Wonderbolts?! Where?!” Dash was momentarily snapped out of her rage, scanning the room in search of the picture. Once she noticed it in Pinkie’s grasp she lunged at her with enough speed to get to Pinkie in about a nanosecond and tackle her. Pinkie Pie of course didn't mind that at all, and let her snatch the picture from her hands. Triumphant, Rainbow cried out a loud ‘mine!’ and rolled to the ground. Moments later we all had the chance to see one of the toughest mares in Ponyville hugging a piece of paper like if it was her own foal, all the while having a goofy grin plastered on her face. That grin however faltered once she took a better look at the picture.
“What the hay…?!” She exclaimed, almost tossing the picture away and looking at it with a mixture of shock and confusion on her face. Taking the opportunity I took a better look at what was on the piece of paper, and after a few seconds I was desperately trying to hold back a laugh.
The picture that Pinkie Pie baited Rainbow Dash was indeed showing the Wonderbolts. In fact, it was a copy of the more popular Wonderbolts posters, a ‘good’ one at that, made with the extensive use of such specialist tools like crayons and markers. As if that wasn’t enough, the signature on the picture itself was a smiling likeness of Pinkie Pie in her normal form with the words ‘you were just pranked by the Pink-E Pie’ written in capital letters underneath it.
Rainbow stared at the piece of paper with a completely stupefied look. By that point of time Pinkie began cracking up and moments later she burst into a fit of giggles. That of course snapped RD out of her stupor and she looked at the laughing mare with a hurt, almost angry expression.
“That was totally uncool.” She said coldly, handing the picture back to Pinkie.
“Ah, don’t be mad Dashie. It was all in good fun. And besides, Twilight asked me to get your attention, and I figured this would be the best way to do that… not to mention the look on your face was priceless!” Our resident party pony replied with a grin threatening to split her head in half. Rainbow in return only rolled her eyes and was about to shift her attention back to Trixie when Twilight decided to step in, both figuratively and literally.
“Rainbow Dash, can you please explain to me why did you do that?” Twi asked, her voice as stern as the look she was giving the rainbow pegasus.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” RD answered evenly, not impressed by Twilight’s attempt at being intimidating.
“I’m talking about why you suddenly decided to interrupt a pony, rudely might I add, when she was giving a lecture.”
“Hey, you can’t blame me for trying to spare us the lies of that fraud!” Rainbow replied hotly. “She was spewing nonsense and generally trying to distract us from what’s important. And didn’t you hear what she was calling me? She dared to call me an idiot for crying out loud, how was I supposed to react to that?!”
“She was right you know.” Twilight replied flatly, unthinking. Of course, it became apparent what her mistake was when Rainbow gave her a totally betrayed look.
“…You too? You think I’m an idiot?” She asked in a hurt voice. Hearing this Trixie snorted in amusement but didn’t comment. Only then did Twilight realize the double meaning behind her own earlier statement and immediately began explaining herself.
“No, no, no, I wasn’t referring to that. I don’t think you’re stupid or anything. Maybe not that well read, but definitely not stupid.” She stumbled with her explanation for a bit until she decided that this was going nowhere. “What I’ve meant was that Trixie was actually giving a fairly good lecture about possible repercussions of casting spells with damaged horns and about the research on artificial horns.”
“Wait a darn moment there sugarcube.” AJ decided to interject, confusion written on her face. “Yer tellin’ us that this ‘un wasn’t spewing a bunch of hooey right now?”
“Well, aside from the bits she used as self-promotion it was more or less what I know on the matter.” She answered simply, causing most of the girls to look stunned at the revelation.
Trixie huffed, puffing out her chest proudly and looked at RD and AJ with superiority.
“Was there ever any doubt? Not only is Trixie great and powerful, but she also possesses knowledge well beyond that of most ponies in Equestria. Your puny little minds can’t even begin to comprehend the vastness of Trixie’s knowledge…!”
“Though I doubt that her theory of those humans using some kind of artificial horns to utilize magic is correct.” Twilight added, making Trixie stop mid-sentence and look at her confusedly for a moment. That confused expression however quickly morphed into a scowl.
“Trixie fails to see how her theory has any flaws, Sparkle. She also fails to see you coming up any of your own, let alone a better one.”
“True, I don’t have a theory of my own, yet, but that doesn’t mean I’ll won’t come up with one sooner or later. Besides, if humans actually are able to create something akin to an artificial horn than they would have to be on a completely different level of development than ponykind, and if they lacked magic earlier, than why were they developing a prosthesis for a clearly magical creature? No, that theory has too many flaws in it to be taken seriously.”
“Than what Sparkle, you suppose that those humans had magic of their own? Don’t make Trixie laugh.” The con mare sneered, which went completely unnoticed by Twilight. She did however react the moment Trixie tried something else. “For somepony tutored by Princess Celestia herself you sure lack open-mindedness, Twilight Sparkle.”
“H-How do you know about that?!” Twi almost shrieked that question out, that’s how surprised she was. It was however a question so ridiculously stupid, that I had to force myself not to faceclaw. Muttering to myself I jabbed my finger Twilight’s side to gain her attention and muttered just loud enough for her to hear.
“You told her yourself, remember?”
“What!? Why would I do that?”
“You were freaking out that you’ll get expelled because you didn’t send your friendship reports on time and you kinda let it slip out… multiple times.” At that Twilight looked quite a bit embarrassed as her mouth formed a small ‘o’, flanked by her blushing cheeks.
Trixie glared at Twilight for the whole time, though a spark in her eyes was enough for me to realize that she was once again enjoying herself, this time on the expense of a fellow unicorn. After noticing Twi’s embarrassment she decided to boost her own morale a bit more.
“It beats Trixie how somepony with an obvious lack of imagination and flare could become a personal protégé of the single most powerful equine in the world. If Trixie was in your horseshoes Sparkle, she would be definitely more powerful than you are right now. As it is however, you have an unfair advantage over Trixie and that was the only thing that saved your life and took care of that Ursa.” Ugh, this again. Seriously, is she going to bring that up all the time we’re stuck here? I hope not.
“Yeah, right, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Muttered Rainbow Dash once she heard those claims, still glaring at the magician yet having at least the semblance of control over herself and not doing anything else. By that time Twilight managed to recover from her embarrassed state and loudly clearing her throat she shifted the conversation back on track.
“I admit, I don’t know how these humans are able to do any magic, or if that pendant-thing really was something similar to an artificial horn, but I still think it’s too much of a coincidence to think this really is the case. There must be something else at hoof here, I just know it.”
“Well, y’all can think ‘bout that later. Now we kinda hafta figure out what the hay we do next.” Applejack decided to interject, figuring this conversation might transform into an argument of two magicians, an argument over something she didn’t have the slightest clue about.
Twilight, though reluctantly, nodded her head in agreement. As much as she was looking forward to a discussion on magical theory, even if her interlocutor would be somepony like Trixie, there were priorities she needed to have in mind. She frowned a bit in thought, and after a moment she looked at the girls, fiery determination burning behind her lavender eyes.
“Father Zantus said something about some kind of festival taking place here. I think that we should take him up on his offer and attend it.” Wait, what? That was something clearly different, normally Twilight tried avoiding any larger social gathering, though that began changing the moment she found friends in Ponyville. But this was different, and the look in her eyes… it was so much like when she was getting started on a new assignment.
“Say what?” Was the only answer Twilight received from her friends, all the girls looking at her with confusion. AJ in particular looked like she didn’t understand what just happened. Twi in turn looked at them as if she didn’t understand why were they even asking her that question.
“Look girls: for the time being we’re stuck here, as in I can’t get us back home. Until we figure out a way out of here, or until I figure out how to actually do magic in this body we’re not going anywhere, and there’s no telling when Princess Celestia is going to find out where we ended up and when she’ll get us back home. So at least for now we should try to blend in and try to make do for the time being. It’s also best if we stay here –it’s the closest civilized place for miles or that’s what I’ve heard, and it may require from us to be in the place we landed in to get back home.”
“So what, you’re telling us that we need to stick around here and do nothing?” Rainbow Dash was not happy about that, and she made it perfectly clear. Applejack too wasn’t looking so thrilled with the prospect of ‘sitting on her hooves’.
“That’s not entirely true.” Twilight replied with conviction. “I for one am going to look for a method that will allow me to use my magic in this body. Hopefully I’ll be able to do so, and then I’ll work on getting us back home from our end. Hm… I’ll probably have to get some local books on magic to figure anything out…”
“You know Twi, that can be a problem.” I decided to interject. In her planning, Twilight overlooked a really important issue. “We don’t have any money on us, the only things we do have are our clothes, and those are more or less rags at this point.” Rarity mentioned at this point something along the lines of ‘I can still salvage some of it’, but I mostly ignored it and continued. “We also can’t just hope that this Zantus character will keep us all tucked in his own church-thingy free of charge forever.”
“That’s a good point Spike. We’ll need to find a source of income.” Twilight nodded, and I could already envision her making a mental checklist of things to do. There was however one thing that stood in the way.
“Darling, not to rain on your parade, but to gather income we would require first to invest some bits of our own.” Rarity stated exactly what I was worried about. “Opening a business has its costs, believe me. You would not believe the amount of really precious gems I had to sell before I could afford my boutique.”
“Then we’ll just have to find jobs. Shouldn’t be too difficult.” Twi tried at another angle.
“Hate ta break it to ya Twi, but earnin’ yer salary ain’t exactly a walk in a park.” Applejack was the one to respond this time, she too not having particularly good news. “We need ta find work that we can do, and Ah doubt any employer’s gunna just pay us up front. We’d need at least a week or so to get any substantial amount o’ money.”
“We could always try and sell the dagger that Einael guy gave us.” I suggested. I was still feeling an odd vibe from it, and by selling it we could get rid of it, making me sleep better, not to mention it would prove somewhat useful in the end. AJ seemed to catch up to my line of thought pretty quickly too, and she wholeheartedly backed my idea up.
“This ain’t half-bad an idea Spike! We’d get some bits out of it Ah reckon, an’ we could live off of what we earn from sellin’ it fer some time, at least until we find some sort o' paid work ‘round here. That fancy lookin’ blade is bound ta fetch a nice price.”
The girls all agreed with Applejack’s reasoning, though Rarity seemed not to be too thrilled about parting with an item of such quality work, even if it was an implement of war. Twilight of course didn’t have the slightest idea what we were all talking about, as well as Trixie, so we had to show her the weapon. All she did with it was look at it for a moment and unsheathe it to check what we were referring to as a quality looking item. Of course she knew exactly as much about weapons as we did, so she didn’t find anything we overlooked. Still, I wonder how much is it really worth…
“Okay, sounds like a plan.” Twilight nodded while sheathing the dagger back and passing it back to Rarity. “We’ll go to the festival, mingle a bit with the locals and try to sell that dagger. After that we’ll…”
“Find a dressmaker and order some clothes.” Rarity suddenly butted in. All eyes fell on her, most of them holding unasked questions in them, and the fashionista could do nothing else than blush at the sudden attention. “What? Spike was right you know, we’re basically going about in rags at this point. We need new clothes, and some change too.”
“Change?” Surprisingly enough it was Trixie who asked that, completely baffled as to what Rarity was talking about. My fair maiden frowned a bit in response and looked at the magician like she was slow.
“Yes, change. I do not fancy parading about naked in a body that lacks any fur, and I am not going to make a scandal just because I don’t have any clothes on.”
“Yes, well… we’ll just have to add that to the list I suppose.” Twilight intervened before Trixie came up with some sort of witty and completely aggravating response. “Okay, after that we’ll try to find a place to stay for now, hopefully some sort of motel or something, and look around for work. I hope they’ll need somepony with our talents around here.” She added the last part in a small voice, Rarity’s and Applejack’s concerns getting to her apparently. She still tried to look strong though, and for the most part she succeeded at it. With a plan to follow and together once again, confidence began to rise within us, for the first time from the moment we ended up here.
There was however one problem.
“And why do you think, Sparkle, that I, the Great and Powerful Trixie, will just like that go with your plan?” I should've expected it. The mare with an ego the size of Canterlot Mountain just had to make this all the more complicated. “In Trixie’s opinion, she will do a lot better without you or your minions to slow her down.”
“Then go ahead, nopony’s keeping you here!” Rainbow almost immediately retorted, torn between anger at being once again called a minion and happiness that Trixie would finally leave us alone. “Goodbye and good riddance!”
“Easy there Rainbow.” I tried to calm her down, knowing full well that this was definitely not something Twilight wanted to happen. Seeing that I was giving her an opening, Twi initiated damage control and tried to convince Trixie to stay.
One thing was for sure however –this was going to be a loooong stay.