//------------------------------// // You Gotta Face Your Fears // Story: Dusk // by Resda //------------------------------// I said my goodbyes to Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie earlier this morning, fully intending to march straight to the hive myself, rescue Twilight and come back, somehow earning redemption in the eyes of those around me, et cetera et cetera. The plan was, essentially, to go on an odyssey of literal and metaphorical self-discovery that speaks to the concepts of identity and the equine condition. The thing about plans like that is that they require you to... well, you know. Move. But I'm still standing here, straddling the tree line into the Everfree Forest. "What are you afraid of?" The sudden voice causes me to nearly jump out of my skin."Afraid? Me? Of course not! All I'm doing is-" I turn around, only to meet Pinkie Pie's smiling face. "Wait. Pinkie, what are you doing here?" Pinkie just smiles brightly back at me. I'm not oblivious to her intentions, though... the saddlebags full-to-bursting resting on her back were indication enough. Behind her, I could see Fluttershy, looking half as cheerful, but just as determined. Her bags were packed as well, and she looked ahead into the forest. "No," I snap. "Not a chance." Pinkie rolls her eyes. "Hmph. As if we're going to let you into the forest alone!" "I can take care of myself," I reply. "Oh, so like the other time you went into the forest all alone?" Pinkie chuckles. "How long were you petrified for? Fluttershy never told me." "That was different!" I say, because it totally is, I mean come on! Unfortunately, another realization quickly sobers my expression. "And technically... that wasn't even me." Pinkie blinks a bit at that, but it isn't enough to dissuade her. "Whatever it is you're afraid of, we can help! Like... oh! Worried about starving to death in the Everfree Forest? Don't be!" Before I can protest, she shoves a hoof into her saddlebag, digging around and producing a blue plate with a single, immaculately frosted cupcake in its center. "Auntie Pinkie's got you covered!" "The river that runs through the forest is clean, and Zecora taught me which wild berries are safe to eat," I offer as a rebuttal. "Plus, well, grass." Pinkie sighs. "What about first aid? What if you run into somepony or something that gets you hurt? Because Fluttershy-" "I'm an alicorn. Pegasus flight, unicorn magic, and earth pony resilience. And alicorn magic is regenerative, if you haven't noticed," I add, flaring both my wings and brushing my hair aside to reveal that the bleeding around my horn had stopped entirely. "And besides that, I know how to defend myself." Pinkie pouts. "What about a map? Do you even know where you're going? Aren't you afraid of getting lost?" "I know exactly where I'm going!" I yell in exasperation. "Because-" Wait. I shouldn't tell them this. How comfortable would they be, knowing exactly how I planned to get to the hive? The idea of me being a changeling copy of Twilight Sparkle was probably bad enough! "...because I figured out where the hive is!" Pinkie Pie, fortunately, did not bother to press the issue. "Well, you're still not going to go alone. Nopony goes into the Everfree Forest alone without Bad Things happening! And I mean Bad Things, capital B, capital T!" She jabbed her hoof into my chest to make sure I got the message. "And then there's something else..." She took in a large gulp of air and paused for effect. Oh boy. "Your plan is, essentially, to go on an odyssey of literal and metaphorical self-discovery that speaks to the concepts of identity and the equine condition." Wait. How did she know about- "As the protagonist of the story, you need side characters to act either as foils to accentuate your character growth, as outlets for building tension (in the form of comic relief, most likely), or as key elements to advance the plotline." ...What. Just... what. I can swear I just heard her use parentheses. How do you even do that verbally? I look over to Fluttershy, who's just as dumbfounded as I am. "I didn't even think you knew those words," I finally admit. Pinkie grins innocently. "What words?" I turn to my saner friend, deciding it's easier to just let it go. "What about you, Fluttershy? Why do you want to come along?" Fluttershy's face disappears behind a pink curtain. "Well... Pinkie's right, nopony should go into the forest alone, but there's more to it than that..." I nod, allowing her to continue. "I... don't like this idea. At all. Going straight to the hive is really, really dangerous." She sighs. "But I understand why you're doing it. You want to do what's right. It's..." She trails off into mumbling. Pinkie nuzzles Fluttershy gently, finishing her thought for her. "It's what Twilight would do in your horseshoes." I heave a great sigh. "There's no way I can dissuade you, is there?" Fluttershy shakes her head. "See? There's nothing for you to be scared of!" Pinkie continues. "You've got me and Fluttershy! The power of three! That's a thing, isn't it?" "Who says I'm scared?" I snap immediately. Pinkie gives me a knowing look. Okay. I'm scared. But it's neither the Forest, nor the things inside it that scare me, nor the possibility of opposition. But there's no need to bother anypony with that, I decide. "Well, come on, then," I say with a sigh and take a step into the forest... the first of many. The Everfree Forest... For all of the rumors of wild magic storms and untamed creatures, ponies never coming out, hidden villages full of blank-flanked zombie ponies, so on and so forth... it would come as a surprise to learn that it's actually quite navigable. The three of us travel through it with relative ease. Whether that ease came from experience, determination or otherwise was neither here nor there. As we get deeper into the forest, my horn begins to tingle. It's a subtle thing. Most unicorns would dismiss it as just some extra magic in the air. But I'm not most unicorns. I know exactly what it is; it's Chrysalis, calling me home. And it's telling me exactly where to go. It's actually interesting to note exactly how many qualities unique to changeling biology found their way into my pony body. I've fed off of love, I can hear the hivemind, my instincts tell me to obey the Queen... but my changeling body was destroyed, its biomass used to build this body. I'm not just a shapeshifted changeling, this is my true form. How thorough was Chrysalis's application of the Proteus Spell? Was it flawed? It never was tested on living subjects, thank Celestia... the concept of copying the consciousness, or the soul... perhaps an incorporeal part of me stayed when the transformation was performed. But then, why wouldn't I have realized it sooner? I mean, I had been, literally been Twilight Sparkle for the better part of a year- Let's think about something else now. Fluttershy moves through the forest like it's her backyard - because it ostensibly is. Her steps are fluid and graceful, and her careful eye spots hazards before even I can see them. But there is still a sense of unease about her. I'm not quite able to place it... and then she looks at me. Our eyes only meet for a split second before she instantly flicks her gaze elsewhere. She's afraid of me. Something else else, please? Pinkie Pie is bouncing about, carefree as can be, considering the circumstances. An errant tail twitch or ear wiggle is the only indication I have that she knows where she's going. But soon she stops in her tracks. "Hey, look you guys!" She jabs a hoof at a grove of trees with reddish-brown bark. "It's the fear trees from that one time! They look kinda dull without the faces on them, don't they?" "I like them better this way," Fluttershy replies, and I chuckle. Pinkie shudders. "Ooh! Twitchy!" Here we go again. Fluttershy and I watch her carefully as her flank begins to bounce to an unheard rhythm. One, two. One and two. One, two, three, four... "My Pinkie Sense says it's time for a musical reprise!" Pinkie announces with finality. "And I've got just the tune!" And suddenly, without warning, she's singing. It's the first song I had ever heard her sing... even if it feels like only yesterday... "When I was a little filly, and the sun was going down..." she croons, wiggling an eyebrow at me. "The darkness and the shadows..." Suddenly, she's pointing a hoof at Fluttershy. She flinches at the sudden attention, but chimes in just the same. "...they would always make me frown..." Now, when I first arrived in Ponyville, this song simply refused to leave my brain. The little earworm persisted for weeks, in which time I had plenty of opportunity to try various harmonies, duets and countermelodies. "I'd hide under my pillow," Pinkie continues, "from what I thought I saw..." "But Granny Pie said that wasn't the way to deal with fears at all..." I finish, as Pinkie's grin stretches incredibly wide. "Pinkie, you've gotta stand up tall, learn to face your fears, You'll see that they can't hurt you, just laugh to make them disappear..." When the three of us belt out a "Ha, ha, ha!" in perfect unison, I can't help but start to laugh for real. But it didn't last long. Fluttershy notices it first. She freezes, flaring out her wings on instinct. I look ahead, past where Pinkie was hopping backwards to the music, to the beast staring back at us, baring its teeth and growling angrily. A manticore. "So... Giggle at the ghostly... guffaw at the- Hey, girls, where'd my backup go?" Pinkie crows, backing up absently. "Pinkie..." Fluttershy stage-whispers. "Don't move." She complies, freezing in place at the sound of growling behind her. Slowly, she turns around, and her eyes look into a maw full of sharp teeth. I watch as her expression instantly turns to one of nervous shock. "Uh... ha ha ha?" she yelps. Pinkie vanishes into thin air before anypony can react. The manticore bites down on thin air and looks around wildly for its missing prey. The party pony reappears, safe and sound, right behind us. I want to yell at the beast. How dare you even think of attacking my friends? I'd say. No big deal, a magical bolt to the face ought to communicate my message just fine. I light up my horn. "Girls, stay back." "Wait a minute..." Fluttershy says, even as the manticore braces itself to pounce on us. But I'm not focusing on that. I'm directing my magic into a powerful blast, keeping my mind off of the rage that threatened to turn it into a wild, uncontrollable explosion. The manticore's expression changes, and it takes a step forward. That's enough of a warning for me. I let the magic fly, even as Fluttershy cries out something I can't understand. A deluge of green fire pours out of my horn like a torrent, immolating the manticore where it stood. The manticore roars in pain as it charges away, illuminating the woods around it with emerald. Green fire. That was green fire. Changeling magic. But that's impossible. I shouldn't have any changeling magic, let alone enough to fire off a blast like that. But considering everything else... the ability to feel the hive, to feed on love from those around me... what did Chrysalis do to me? I hear a hoofstep behind me. Pinkie's looking down the path the manticore took, marked with tiny, fading wisps of flame. "Pinkie... are you..." I start, but she holds a hoof up, studying the green fire intensely. Of course she's going to figure it out. I already know what she's going to ask... "Did you send the manticore to Princess Celestia?" I put a hoof to my forehead, for lack of an appropriate reaction. "No, Pinkie, I just..." "Because I've only ever seen green fire twice. One was Spike's fire, and the other was from changeling magic. So it's gotta be one of those." Despite Pinkie's flawed logic, I still dignify her with a response. "No, Pinkie, I didn't send the manticore to the Princess." "Then it's changeling fire." "But it can't be changeling fire," I argue. "I've been using unicorn magic for months. I shouldn't even be able to-" "Well, which is it?" Pinkie asks, pointing a hoof at me. "You're being awfully confusing." I try to sputter out a reply before Pinkie comments again. "Fluttershy, what do you think?" We both turn to the pegasus. Her body is trembling, eyes shaded behind her hair as she struggles to come to terms with what has just happened. When she speaks, I feel more dread than I did with the manticore: "You... you hurt it." "Pinkie was in danger," I reply, trying to stand my ground. "Manticores are territorial. All we had to do was apologize and get out of his territory." Fluttershy's gaze snaps up to me. Her normally serene face is twisted with rage. "All we had to do was talk!" I'm completely taken aback. "It was instinct!" I argue. "There's no need to get this upset! Why are you even..." "That manticore was the one that was injured, two years ago. The one that Nightmare Moon attacked. All it took was a little kindness, and he let us through." Fluttershy's advancing on me, and I can't do anything but step backward. "But you... you immediately set it on fire! You're..." I try to reply, but Fluttershy cuts me off. "You're less like Twilight Sparkle than I thought." The forest is deathly silent for a full minute. Fluttershy's words send me reeling, more so than Rainbow Dash's hoof did yesterday. "Fine," I stammer out, "that's... f-fine." I meet Fluttershy's gaze with one of equal intensity. "Because I'm not Twilight Sparkle." Fluttershy puts a hoof to her lips, realizing what she's said. "Wait, Dusk, I-" "This was a bad idea," I declare, taking a breath. I feel out the call of the hive again and know exactly which direction to go. "You two can go back. I'll be fine on my own." Pinkie whimpers from behind me. "Dusk, you don't have to..." I don't bother to turn around. Their voices fade into the backdrop of the forest, drowned out by the constant buzz that lingers in my ears. So here I am. Alone, in the Everfree Forest, following a sound only I can hear to a place where I'm sure to end up killed or worse. A sane mare would have turned tail and fled long ago. But I'm far from sane. Stupid. Stupid. How could I have just assumed that everything would be alright? They knew I wasn't Twilight, yet it was so easy to fall back into the usual patterns again. Even for me... how many stolen memories crossed my mind over the last few hours? How simple was it to just forget? The buzzing kicks in again, right on cue. Return. Home, she's telling me. With every step I take, I know that I'm just granting her wish. Before I know it, I can see the tree line start to thin out. The orange light of sunset peeks through the foliage, and the air itself seems to get lighter. That's one leg of the journey down... or is it? The growling behind me tells me otherwise. I turn around, by degrees so as not to provoke the beast, but I already know who it is. The manticore from before is glaring down at me. Parts of its flesh are charred and blackened from my last assault, but that only makes it look more intimidating than before. As it bears down on me, breathing hot, misty breaths that threaten to blow me off of my hooves, I can only think of Fluttershy. "Look," I start, as I backpedal away from the manticore. "I'm sorry for setting you on fire. I was trying to protect my friend. You understand that, right?" The manticore's growl quiets somewhat, though it still advances, slowly but surely. A little kindness, huh? Let's see about that. I stand my ground, making myself look as large and inedible as possible. "I'm going to leave the forest. I'll be out of your... uh, mane... very soon. I won't bother you again." It crouches lower. But this time, what I thought was a pounce looks more like an attempt to understand what I was saying. "So..." I try. I don't have Fluttershy's way with animals, so I can only pray that this is working. "Uh, bygones?" The manticore lowers itself further. Is it agreeing? It's not growling anymore, but I can hear something hissing, and pick up the acrid smell of something acidic burning through the ground. No. It's not here to make peace. I see its eyes flash, and brace myself for its inevitable attack. "Stop!" That... that's not the sound of an angry manticore. That's the sound of an angry pegasus caretaker. I dare to look up, only to find myself yanked backwards by a pair of pink hooves. From my new vantage point, I can see Fluttershy, clamped on the manticore's stinging tail. "Don't you dare attack my friend!" she yells. The manticore roars, whipping Fluttershy about like a rag doll. Her grip finally loosens, and she is thrown to the ground. "Fluttershy!" Pinkie and I cry out. But she's on her feet quickly, staring down the creature. Her wings splay open. Her posture changes, and her eyes take on all the qualities of a wild animal. The manticore shrinks back under the might of her gaze, and for a moment I'm reminded of Chrysalis. "Go," she commands. "Now." The manticore complies, retreating deep into the forest and vanishing from sight. I'm dumbstruck. Applejack and the others always mentioned how powerful her Stare was, but to actually witness it... "Fluttershy, that was amazing," I manage after a moment. Fluttershy looks back at me. Her smile is weak, her gaze unfocused. Does the Stare usually do that to her? Or... Oh... oh no. Pinkie leaps forward before I can. "No, no, please, don't be..." She catches Fluttershy, just as her legs finally give out, and flips her body over into a supine position. There, plain as day, is a deep puncture wound. It's only then that I finally notice the blood, dripping off of her body and onto the forest floor. Fluttershy stares past me, into the golden light of the sun. "Oh, look, it's the edge of the forest... we made it after all..." Her eyes flutter closed as her entire body goes limp in Pinkie's arms.