//------------------------------// // The Suspects // Story: Equestia's Unsolved Case Files // by Silverstreak //------------------------------// Ponyville 9 a.m. "Do you even know where you're going?" Jack looked down at the tired reporter, questioning why she brought him with her. "Yes." "Really?" "Of course." "Then why have we been walking around this town for two hours!" "Gathering clues." The reporter seemed to drown in his misery. "How is walking around the town gathering clues? Aren't we suppose to be talking to the two on the list!" Jack brought the list out from her front pocket, reading the names she remembered the real reason for their visit. Oh jeez. I better not forget again when I meet them. They walked through the town for a few more minutes before coming to a giant tree. Jack barely had control over her body and voice as the got closer. "Well, we're here...Twilight Sparkle's house!" Jack sounded like a mouse being stepped on. The reporter looked up worried about the human. "Are you sure?" "Yes, come on." Jack knock three times on the door that only went as high as her shoulders. "It's so small!" "Well what did you expect?" The door opened before Jack could answer. Though Jack couldn't answer anyway due to the fact that she had to locked down her jaw from screaming from joy at seeing Twilight. "Can I help...you?" Twilight and the reporter both looked up at Jack, who seemed to be frozen in place. "Can we talk inside Miss Sparkle, I have the notes I need to ask you some questions." "Oh, yes come in." Twilight lead the way into her home, while the reporter gave one last worried glance at the human. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "And why do you think I would kill my teacher?" "Well you're the first one on the list." "What list?" ''The list of ponies working in Celestia's kill and bake ponies list." "She made a list!" "Yes." "That little bitch! She told me that I wouldn't be connected to the murders!" "Well were not really all that concerned with the murders, just Celestia's murder." "Oh, well what do you want to know." "Wait, you believe me that easy?" "Well of course, they don't call it a truth spell for nothing." "Wait, you put a truth spell on me." "Yeah." "When?" "Before I opened the door." The reporter was at a lost for words, not once in his life did he suspect this. "Well while you gather your thoughts, lets see. The Princess saw great potential in me when I was young, uh, when I got older she told me she could help me become more powerful if I helped her kill rebellious ponies. Except for Rainbow Dash being the element of loyalty she was pretty much safe. Maybe that's why she slept so much, being untouchable she didn't really have to watch her back so much. Then she just must have gotten to lazy to attack the princess, or afraid that being the element of loyalty wouldn't help her there? Well anyway I don't really kill any ponies, I just help my associate track them down and erase all records of them from the town. Then every now and then Celestia would give me a spell that would help me become more powerful, speaking of which you didn't happen to find any spells that could turn me into an alicorn? Did you?" ''What...why would you want to become an alicorn?" "Well more magic and power, plus being the element of magic I could've thrown Celestia over and ruled." "Why?" "To get revenge on all those who despised me in magic kindergarten." The report stood dumbfounded by what Twilight just said, unable to think of anything to say. "What?'' Twilight looked confused at the reporter's face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After dragging Jack for ten minutes away from Twilight's house, she finally became unfrozen. "Uh...uh...wha..." "Finally you're unfrozen!" "What happened?" "I think Twilight use her magic to freeze you." "Why would she do that? Can she do that? Well of course she can, but I mean..." "I know what you mean, it's just that she said that she was power hungry and wanted to become an alicorn..." Jack giggled a little bit. "What's so funny?" "Well it's just that you said that Twilight wanted to become an alicorn." "Well she did!" "Sure." Jack stood, grabbed the list out from her pocket, "Alright who's ne..." The reporter looked up at the human. "What? Let me see, let me see!" "P....p...." "You have to pee?" "No, p...pi...pi..." The reporter jumped and grabbed the list with his teeth. "Oh let me see. Yeah a Miss Pinkamena Diane Pie." "I prefer Pinkie Pie, but you can call me that." Both Jack and the reporter jumped into the air. "Huh, that's a lot higher then usual." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sugarcube Corner 9:32 a.m. "Hey where's your friend?" The reporter struggled to speak clearly while trying to stop a smile, but he couldn't do it not in a room as colorful and decorated as this. He finally cracked. "She's downstairs." "Want me to go get her?" The reporter closed his eyes, giggling and the sparkles in Pinkie's main. "No thanks she said something about..." He opened his eyes to see her gone, "How? I had the door locked?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Jack walked the kitchen, nerves on high. She was in Sugercube Corner. Sugercube Corner! "Hey." Jack leapt back, almost knocking into the fridge. She held a terrible kung fu stance, facing Pinkie who had just popped out of a drawer. "How did you? Never mind you're Pinkie." "Hey are you ok?" "Yeah I'm fine." Jack wiped sweat from her forehead, "Just fine." "Then why are you shaking?" "Shaking? I'm not shaking." "Sure. Anyway your friend is waiting for you upstairs." "Oh, I'm not part of the interrogation." "What's interrogation mean?" "It means asking questions?" "Oh, so why don't we interrogate down here. I'll bake you both some cupcakes!" "Uh, no, no it's better that he ask you questions upstairs." Pinkie had already gotten all the bowls, utensils, and ingredients. "Really?" "Yeah, but after we can have some cupcakes." "You promise." "Yeah I promise." "Okey Dokey, I'll be right back." Pinkie left the kitchen, and went back upstairs. Jack went back to walking the kitchen. "Oh my god. I'm going to have cupcakes with PInkie!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sugarcube Corner 9:41a.m. The reporter continued to scan the room, looking for a way that Pinkie could have escaped. The door was still locked, windows where locked, and the floor wasn't loose in any area. "What are you doing?" The reporter leapt into the air, smashing his head on the roof. "Oops, sorry. I forgot how easily you get scared." "I don't get scared!" "Then what was that?" Pinkie lifted a hoof into the air. "Well...what was what you did?" "What?" "You know, the disappearing and reappearing out of nowhere." "I don't know." "What do you mean you don't know! You just did those things." "Well yeah, but I don't know how I did them." "Oh come on, you have to have a unicorn helping you." "Nope, just me." "Really?'' Pinkie nodded her head, sparkles flying around. "Ok, well, um," The reporter lifted the clipboard, but paused halfway, feeling somepony breath down his back. He turned to see Pinkie standing behind him, eyes moving as she read. "Um, can you sit down please." "Sure." "Ok, so what do you know about Celestia's murder." "Well she died from a fall, which is really weird since she had wings, though if somepony was to cut them off then she could fall, but she still has her horn, but if you cut that off then she could fall to her death. Though that would be a waste of good meat." The reporter stood frozen from Pinkie's words. ''Are you ok?" "What no!" "Well why not?" "Because of what you said!" "What that you're ok?" "No before that!" "Oh about a waste of meat." "Yeah a waste of meat that's Celestia!" "Well why does that make you not ok." "Because it's Celestia and you and Twilight and others want to kill and bake and eat!" "Oh come on, you should be fine with this already, I'm mean Celestia's been dead for about two days now." "Well, I've been on the case for about a few hours, but how did you..." "Please I haven't had a kill order for two days." "No, no I'm done, we're done." "Done with what?" "This 'interrogation'." "Oh goody! Now I can bake you some cupcakes!" Pinkie flew to the door, opened it, and disappeared down the stairs. "I need to get a new talent." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Are you sure they were on the list!" "Yes." "Ugh." "What's wrong?" "We've been in this town for two days! We've talked to about everypony in it, and we're still looking for two more!" "Well then we'll keep looking!" "Why!" "We're investigating a murder, my trusty sidekick." "Really? Cause the questions you're asking seem to be coming from a mouse who doesn't even remember why it's here!" "Why I..." A grey blur crashed into the ground between the two, causing them both to leapt backwards on their backs. "God Damn It! I'm sick of all these ponies flying out of nowhere!" "And I'm sick of being a part of this investigation!" "Wow, you two are mad." Jack lifted her head to see a grey pony a yellow main and tail with bubbles on her flank. "Derpy? Derpy Hooves?" "You know me!" Jack's head fell back down muttering something about crooked eyes. Derpy looked over to the reporter. "Is she ok?'' "Honestly I don't care anymore." "I'm Derpy. Who are you?" "Hi Derpy. I'm..." Jack popped back up on her feet. ''Derpy!" "Yes." ''Is it true that you are the mailpony for Ponyville?'' Derpy nodded her head, searching around for something. "Oh no!" "What?'' "My mailbag!" Derpy started flapping her wings lifting herself into the air, "I need to find it!" The reporter lifted a brown bag from his hoof. "This is it, right?" Derpy flew into him, hugging him violently. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" "No...problem! Now can you....let go...of me!" "Oh yeah sorry!" The reporter rubbed his throat. "It's ok.'' Derpy reached into the bag, pulled out a banana muffin, and started eating it. "Uh, Derpy?'' "Yes." She spat muffin at Jack. "Isn't that suppose to be your mailbag?'' "No silly this is my muffinbag." The reporter started sneaking up to Derpy's muffinbag, hoping to snatch one to settle his stomach. Derpy spun around in mid-air, kicking the poor reporter in the chest, and knocking him back three feet. "Woah! What was that about?" "He tried to sneak up on me." "No I saw that. I meant with the spin-kick move there." "Ahhhh!" "What?" "My mailbag!" With that Derpy flew off, leaving Jack stunned by the moment. Only when the reporter tapped her leg did Jack come out of her trance. "What was that?" "That my sidekick, was Derpy Hooves.'' "She's..." "Weird." "Yeah.''