//------------------------------//
// A Time for Action 
// Story: First Impressions 
// by Dynamic Dragon 
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As I flew over towards Ponyville, I reflected on why things were so bad there.  In many ways, it was not very different from Fillyfurt.  It had a peaceful, idyllic location.  Many of its celebrations and events looked fun.  The ponies there were polite and charming.  So what was the problem with it?

Well, for one thing, "charming" was not necessarily the same thing as "Nice".  For example, that awful yellow pegasus seemed kind and inoffensive at first, but that was only to get away with things.  She was cowardly, possessive, passive-aggressive, insulting, and, surprisingly enough, foul tempered.  An ambassador from the tribal council attended last year's Grand Galloping Gala, and had witnessed her breakdown when the animals in the Canterlot gardens refused to befriend her.  Reportedly, she had even tried to kill one of the squirrels.  Yet, for some reason, she was beloved by nearly everypony in town.  Then again, there were those in the Kraftalkon tribe who were nostalgic for the days of Vladimir von Feldkamp, a brutal, paranoid, megalomaniacal, psychotic, borderline genocidal dictator whose only real redeeming quality was his courage.  It probably helped that she was considered to be attractive.  After all, she had been a model for a while.  However, that alone was not enough to explain it.  I had to admit that I was drawing a blank on why so many ponies seemed to genuinely like her.  The pegasus' name was Fluttershy, which was a very inoffensive name for a very offensive pony.  How she ever got to become the wielder of the Element of Kindness, I would never know.

Many of the ponies there were rude.  That obnoxious Pinkie Pie might have been amusing, had she not blatantly kept trying to come between me and Dash.  None of my warnings got her to leave us alone.  Granted, I was probably a bit harsher than I should have been, but it was the first time in years that I had seen the one I had linked souls with.  Many ponies, especially those in Junior Speedsters', had believed my close friendship with Dash was a lesbian relationship.  In reality, however, it was much more complicated than that.  I was very close to Dash, but had never considered her a romantic partner.  Those lamer ponies always had sex on the brain.  I remember how one obnoxious pegasus kept following us with a drooling expression on his face, and telling us to make out.  In retaliation, I had crept into his cabin at night and placed a tarantula on his... nether regions.  It was not poisonous, but it was big and hairy enough to give him a good scare.

Then again, the ponies there had gotten more mature with age.  After all, they had only been kids and teens when all that had happened.  However, those of Ponyville had no such excuse.  Pinkie Pie seemed like a child in an adult's body, and had been very possessive.  She blatantly tried to break up my friendship with Dash, and may have succeeded.  Moreover, many of the pranks she had assigned for me were very painful.  For example, her "joy buzzer hoofshake" sent spasms rocking through my body.  She should have known that a buzzer made for someone with hooves would be incredibly  painful to someone with claws.  Besides, since she was the one who used the buzzer, that was at least one prank that could be credited to her.  Dash may have come up with some of the other pranks, but Pinkie was the one who threw the party.  I had very special things in mind for her and her bitchy friend Fluttershy.  

Still others were openly bigoted.  I remembered what that old mare had said to me when I had first arrived.


****


I landed in the Market, hoping to find a place to eat at.  Many of the ponies there stared at me.  I reminded myself that this was not Fillyfurt, and Griffins did not visit often.  The earthcrawlers would hopefully not be too bad.  

My stomach growled.  It was still very early in the morning, and there were only a few stalls open.  Most of the stores had no lights on.  Dash had said in her letters that the ponies here were very nice, and the food was very good.  It had delicious apples.  I saw that one apple stall was open.  It was controlled by an elderly mare with a green coat, and a young filly who I guessed was her granddaughter.  The filly did not yet have her cutie mark, and she had a yellow coat and a red mane.

As I walked over to the cart, I was nervous.  I was not used to dealing with earthcrawlers.  On my approach, I noticed that the mare was half asleep.  She was slouched over, and her eyes were barely open.  I didn't  make any loud noises or sudden moves, not wanting to startle the old filly.  The little filly gently nudged her and said "Granny Smith, we've got a customer."

As she woke up, a startled expression crossed her face when she noticed me.  I sighed, hoping it meant nothing more than she was surprised to see a griffin.  My older brother Adolph had always told me to be diplomatic whenever possible, even when someone was not being nice.  However, he also told me to not be a doormat, and to stand up for myself when needed.  It was advice that had gotten him far as a businessperson.  

I forced myself to smile.  "Hello.  I'd like to buy an apple.  How much?"

Granny glared at me.  "What's it to ya?"

I sighed.  Oh, wonderful.  "I said, I would like an apple".

"We ain't sellin' to beasts".

I felt my efforts to be polite slipping away.  "Excuse Me?!"  I tried to return to a pleasant tone.  "I am not a beast", I said in a tone with an edge to it.  "I am a person who would like to buy apples".

"After your kind killed and ate my aunt Gold Delicious, Ah don't think you griffins are people anymore.  More likely, you'd wanna use them to flavor pony stew.  The only apples I'd give to y'all are horseapples!"

Her granddaughter told her "She's a payin' customer, Granny."  Then she turned to me.  "Sorry 'bout that.  Granny grew up during the Sharptalon war".

I assumed the filly meant the Ironhoof war.  That was surprising, considering that the war was three hundred years ago, and I had yet to personally meet anyone who had lived that long.

Any respect she might have just gained was lost, however, when she replied.  "Apple Bloom!  We do not talk to cannibals!  Do you want to be served on a platter with an apple in your mouth?"

By this point, I had lost my temper.  "Fine, then!  I'm not buying from a specist old mare! Hope you go out of business, you lame pony!"

"Go back north and eat yourself to death", she replied to me, and walked away, her granddaughter in tow.  I made an obscene gesture as she left.


****


That bigoted old filly had been a major pain.  I got my revenge on her, but that had only made things worse.  For some reason, she was seen as a pillar of the community.  Most likely, it was because she was the only apple supplier in the area.  If anybody else tried to sell apples in Ponyville, she and her hick grandchildren would be forced to leave.

In short, the only cool pony in town was Rainbow Dash.  Even then, the town was starting to corrupt her, because she had taken their side over mine.  However, that would soon change.  She would see Ponyville for what it really was, and come crying back to me.  I just hoped that I wasn't too late.

By this point, I noticed that I was nearing the edge of the forest.  I landed and ducked behind a tree.  Nobody was around, and there was a puddle nearby.  This was the perfect opportunity to test my package.

I sprayed myself and the stick with a perfume bottle containing Rainbow Dash's scent.  I had subtly collected it by following her during her training and gathering the sweat she left.  After that, I took out the package and removed the wrapping paper.  I opened the box, and saw a ring.  In every way, it look ordinary, but as I prepared to put it on, it changed size to fit one of my talons.  

I put it on and checked the puddle.  As I bent over, I saw no reflection.  The puddle only showed trees and the sky.  The ring had been made by very skilled unicorns working for the De Buck's jewelry company.  With this, I could move around Ponyville undetected, as long as I stayed quiet.  Satisfied, I picked up the stick and flew towards Sweet Apple Acres.

I landed in a field near the barn.  My stick would make a great screwdriver.  Everything on the farm was held together by screws, and moreover, they were all the same type of screw.  However, I would have to work blind, because the ring also made anything I was wearing or holding invisible with me.  I had ordered some contacts that would counteract this, but until then, I would have to work by feel alone.  

I headed over to the plow.  It took a while, but I eventually got a feel for unscrewing while invisible.  I worked carefully on each screw.  I didn't unscrew each screw completely, but just enough to make the plow unstable.  Hopefully, they would not notice until it was too late.  After that was done, I moved over to the other farming equipment in the barn.

By the time I was finished, every piece of farming equipment was hanging by a thread.  It had taken me well over an hour to finish, but the results would be worth it.  I had considered doing the same thing to the buildings, but ruining the family's livelihood would be incredibly petty.  Besides, I didn't want to make them really suffer, I just wanted to prove a point. 

As I left the farm, I helped myself to some apples.  Then, I headed up towards Dash's house.  

As I approached, I noticed that Dash was not there.  She was probably off practicing her trick flying.  This was a perfect opportunity.  The only witness was a sleeping tortoise, who I avoided waking up.  As I walked into the living room, I noticed that Dash had several books on her coffee table, many of them part of the Daring Do series.  

I smiled to myself.  It seemed that Dash had finally discovered the joys of reading.  She'd given me some good-natured ribbing for liking to read, but I had always hoped that she would get into it too.

Then, I remembered why I had come here.  I needed to hide the stick in a place that was fairly well hidden, but just enough to pass over initially.  I wanted it so that somebody would be able to find it, if they knew what they were looking for.  Then it hit me.  I went into Dash's bedroom and hid the stick under her bed.

I smiled to myself and flew out the window.  As I headed back to Fillyfurt to do some shopping and check my mail, I thought to myself.  Soon, you'll know how it feels, Dash.  Then you'll realize how bad Ponyville really is, and come crying back to me.  I hope I'm humble enough not to say that I told you so.