//------------------------------//
// Dealing with it 
// Story: G.N.D: A My Little Dashie Sequel 
// by Nibrudly 
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It was hard finding room for all seven of them, especially Celestia. Luckily, she was able to fit on the couch in the living room and I was able to find places on the floor for everyone else. Dashie set up a cot next to Dad’s bed, caring for all his needs alongside Annie. It was hilarious when she came that first evening to set Dad up with his IV and she saw all of them. She went for the baseball bat Dad keeps in the front closet, waiting for them to strike before I explained what was going on. Then I showed her my Dad’s album, Dashie introduced herself, and Dad and Twilight confirmed that it was all real. She’s still uneasy, but now she’s sort of used to them all. 

We had talked about how we were going to explain this to Jake and Lucy when they came on Friday. In the end, we just had them meet the ponies without trying to hide them, and without trying to explain them away. Lucy went crazy when she saw them; she watches the re-runs every Saturday. It blew her mind to find out that Rainbow Dash was technically her aunt. Jake was freaked out at first; he didn’t really know what to do. But once he saw they weren’t going to bite, he thought they were, in his words “really cool,” especially once Dash whipped him at TF2. With the ponies here, it’s definitely made them happy again; Lucy especially.

As for me, I still can’t believe they’re real. I mean, with how he would talk about Dashie and all those birthdays we celebrated, I knew she was real in some way. But just to see her and be able to touch her is rather surreal. All I know is this was the best possible thing that could happen. Now that she’s here, I know my Old Man is going to die with the biggest smile on his face. Not that he wasn’t before, and not that I want him to die, I’m just glad he got to see her again before he had to go. I’m still having a hard time seeing her as my sister; I’m sure she feels the same way about me. (That still doesn’t seem altogether right. But it’s what my Old Man wants and that’s what I’ll give him.)         

It is for that reason I was surprised to find her waiting for me outside on the front porch Wednesday afternoon. She seemed out of it, sort of like how I was back when I was younger. If she was, she certainly wasn’t admitting it as she called me over to sit next to her. 

“Hey.” She had a smile on her face, but it looked forced more than anything else.

“Hey.” I took my seat next to her.

“So I was just sitting here and I realized we haven’t really talked.”

“Have you talked to Annie?”

“Occasionally, we chat when she comes in to attend to Dad. Don’t change the subject.” She gave me a small punch on my shoulder.

“Okay then, what would you like to talk about?”

“I was wondering just how you ended up becoming my ‘brother.’”

Last time I told this story was at the charity dinner for the orphanage when Ryan had asked me to be the guest speaker; haven’t really talked to him since his dad died. In any case, it was a story I certainly didn’t mind repeating. Though this time, I used the abridged version.

“He joined a program at the city orphanage and he was assigned to me. This went on for a couple of months before things kicked up a notch.”

“What do you mean?” 

“When he came for our annual Christmas Party, he gave me one of grandma’s painting’s. It was one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received. When I ran over to thank him I accidentally called him Dad. From then until New Year’s I was worried I had freaked him out and that he was going to keep his distance, but you know what? When he came for our New Year’s bash he said he was actually open to the idea. Six months later, the paperwork was signed and I was legally his.”

“Nice,” she stared out at the lawn, Lucy and a few of the ponies were setting up goal posts, “Sounds like it was really wonderful.”

I did the same. “I don’t know what I would have done without him.”

We sat there watching Lucy playing soccer with Pinkie, Fluttershy and Applejack for a good ten minutes before she continued. “Does he talk about me much?”

“From time to time. Definitely on your birthday; that’s when he won’t stop gushing about you.”

She seemed surprised. “He still celebrates it?”

“It’s like a national holiday in our house. He’d phone the school and tell them I was sick just so I wouldn’t miss a minute celebrating it.”

Now she looked really anxious. “Did he get my letter?”

“He reads it out loud every September seventeenth.”

With this she calmed herself with a sigh of relief. Did she not know he had it this whole time? We both gave a cheer and clapped as Lucy shot a goal past Pinkie. Before we were done, she asked her next question.

“So…when’d he get cancer?”

“He was diagnosed three years ago. They thought they had caught it in time, but it was resilient to treatment. Just last week he said he didn’t want to spend the last of his days in a place that smelled of formaldehyde. So we brought him home.”

With that her smile faded. She watched the soccer game for another few minutes before hopping off the porch and flying away. Obviously something was eating her, but I had other things on my mind at that moment. I hopped down and walked over to the truck and grabbed my paints out of the back seat.  After the arrival of the ponies, I didn’t want to take the chance of any of them spontaneously deciding to be artistic; especially Pinkie. I had decided that just leaving my canvas and easel inside was enough. As I opened the door to my Dad’s bedroom I saw Rarity helping him button up what had to be the most expensive looking pair of pajamas I had ever seen.

“What do you think?”

“Now that feels nice. Thank you very much.”

“Oh, don’t mention it, darling; I always love to challenge myself.”

“Well I’d say you passed with flying colors, well done. Now if you’ll excuse me, I believe my son is going to paint.”

“Then I’ll get right out of your way.”

I held the door open as Rarity left to go find another project. I set my box of paints on the floor before I set up my easel.

“Alright, you ready for that session you asked for?” I started looking around for a stool to use.

“You have no idea.”

“What would you like me to paint?”

“A portrait.”

Was he serious? “Really? Now?”

“David, I would have preferred to have had this done when I still had my health, but it’s past that point now. And these are some really fancy pajamas I got on. Can you humor your Old Man and just paint the picture?”

I gave a small chuckle; if that’s what he wanted, that’s what I’d give him. “Any particular way you want to be portrayed?”

“Hmm…get me an umbrella. And see if you can find a cool hat. Make it look like one of those war portraits. You know, cool guy with his sword thrust high in the air?”

“Would you like me to make you a medal as well?” I said as I assembled my gear in front of his bed.

“A medal? Come now David, don’t be ridiculous.”

Now I had to laugh for that one. This had started when Jake was a toddler, but he had gotten more and more ridiculous as the cancer had progressed. It definitely kept our minds off of what was happening to him. 

“Just try to make me look good. I know I’m not giving you a lot to work with.”

It didn’t matter; I would still make him look good. As I squeezed my paints onto my palette, I took notice of the contours of his face: all the wrinkles around his mouth from laughing, and all depressions in his head from furrowing his eyebrows. He did that more when I was in high school; I wasn’t exactly the most well behaved kid. But to his relief I mellowed out once I went to college. That was such a long time ago. 

I decided to leave the face for last. I used a nice royal blue to match his new pajamas, and I mixed a little yellow into some white to match the cream of his sheets. Once I finished that, I used a combination of browns to almost exactly match the color of the headboard, and I used differing shades of gray to not only match the wall, but to show the contrast of the sun hitting the space over his head. Everything was coming along nicely, so I went back to his face. I took a glance and noticed he wasn’t smiling like he was when we first began. That’s what makes the whole painting.

“Hey Dad?”

“Yes?” I don’t think he even noticed it.

“Could you smile?”

“Oh…sorry; this better?” I know he likes to play it up, but that’s the worst smile I have ever seen him make.

“It would be, if it weren’t so forced.”

“What do you want? I’m a dying man whose kids are having a hard time dealing with it. It’s hard to be happy about that fact.”

He wasn’t really going to bring that up now was he? “Now Dad…”

“Oh, don’t give me your crap, David. You may wear a smile but I know you’re frowning when I’m not looking. Could you just tell me what’s going on instead of putting on a show for me?”

The smile slowly disappears from my face and I give him a plaintive expression.

“There we go, that’s a more believable face.” 

“Does this really matter, Old Man?” 

“Buddy, when you’re about to bow out and you have loose ends to take care of, you’ll appreciate it if people wear their hearts on their sleeves.”

Of course, he was bringing it up now. “Fine. I don’t want you to go. That what you want to hear?”

“Well I certainly wouldn’t have liked it if you said you hated my guts and would do the cha-cha on my grave.”

With this my smile returned. He always could get me to smile.

“I think that’s what I’m going miss the most.”

“What?”

“Just being able to talk with you.”

“Really? I thought I was more annoying than anything else.”

“Sometimes.” My smile was replaced by a solemn expression. “I’m gonna miss you, Dad.”

His face did the same. “I know. At least we have this final send off, eh?”

“Yeah.”

We stared at each other for a good long while, words neither of us cared to speak aloud being read in the other’s eyes. After our silent exchange, we returned to reality. 

“So, let’s finish that portrait.”

With this he gave me his best smile, all his wrinkles and even some teeth. I made them whiter than I’d care to admit, or allow my Old Man to find out. All said and done, it looked magnificent. Even though I made sure to capture his sickly appearance, he still pulled it off. In my painting, I saw a man not defeated by cancer, but a man who was calm and anxiously waiting the chance to laugh when death came for him. It had to be the best portrait I had ever made. I took it off the easel and flipped it around for his inspection.

“How’d I do?”

“I don’t know, he looks rather old, don’t you think? And that bald head is very unbecoming. You know, I think this guy would benefit from hair plugs, don’t you?”

“Maybe a nose job as well.”

His smile grew even bigger. “That’s my boy.”

He opened his arms wide and I obliged him. Even though he was weak, he still had that strength in his embrace; just like that day on the porch so long ago. After a few minutes, we broke off and he looked up to me, this pleading look in his eyes.

“Hey, David?”

“Yeah?”

“Could you talk to your sister for me? I think she’ll listen to you.”

“What’s the matter with her?”

“She’s taking this especially hard. She’s trying to be subtle, but I can tell she’s beating herself up about this. I’ve told her constantly that she’s here, she’s good, she doesn’t have to worry about it, but I can hear her sniffling at night when my back is turned to her and I can feel her eyes every night boring a hole in the back of my baldness as well. So could you talk to her: brother to sister?”

“You think I would do better?”

“I’m sure there are things that when said by a sibling means more than when it comes from a parent’s mouth. I wouldn’t know anything about that, but I’m not going to be content with leaving until she gets it through that thick head of hers that she couldn’t do anything about this.”

It didn’t seem like such a big deal to me, but there was that look in his eyes. This was like that last item on his bucket list he absolutely had to finish. 

“Can you do that for me?”

“Absolutely.”

“Promise?”

“I promise I’ll get it through her thick head.”

“Now that’s a good man.”

I left the room and began my mission to find Dashie. I checked downstairs, upstairs, the yard, even the roof, but she was nowhere to be found. I went to the back and saw Twilight looking towards the woods with a pair of binoculars. 

“Hey, uh…Twilght?”

She hadn’t even noticed my arrival. “Oh!” the binoculars began to fumble in her hooves and it took her a few second to regain her grip, “Yes?”

“You didn’t happen to see where my ‘sister’ went did you?”

“Siste-Oh! You mean Rainbow?”

“Yes.”

“She went into the woods.” The sun was starting to turn orange. I needed to hurry; a night hike was not on my to-do list for today.

“Thanks.”

“Nice to hear you think of her like that.” She called out as I began to jog away.

I turned back and waved as I made my way towards the woods. With the time I had, I couldn’t go looking all over. For all I knew, she had picked a tree far in the back. So until a better idea came to me, I stuck to the trail. Rays of orange were shining through the canopy when I came to the Tree. It was on of the few landmarks in these woods. It was also one of the most likely places I would find her. However, after a quick scan, I didn’t see any trace of her in its boughs. Maybe she was in the general vicinity.

“Dashie?! You out here?!”

“What’re you doing here?”

I looked up and there she was, lying on the natural platform towards the top, right before the branches spilt apart. I had once considered asking Dad to make a tree house up there. Now my father’s daughter was lying up there with a sad look in her eyes. This was going to be lots of fun.

“I thought it’d be nice to talk some more. You know, all that family stuff.”

“Some family I am.” 

“What?” I didn’t quite catch that. In any case, the sun was setting and I preferred to be indoors before it was dark. 

“Look, could you please come down?”

“Why?”

“Because I promised a dying man I’d talk to you. It’s a promise I intend to keep.”

She took her eyes off of me and just stared into the canopy. Alright then, two can play at that game.

“I will climb up there.”

She scoffed, “You got a pair of wings?”

“No, but I can get a ladder.”

She popped one eyebrow and gave me a stare of disbelief.

“I’ll come back with one, I’m not kidding.”

Now I had gotten through to her. With a roll of her eyes and an exasperated sigh, she came down and landed next to me.

“Thank you.”

“What do you want?” 

“Like I said, just want to talk.”

“About what?” 

“Dad thinks you’re beating yourself up about what happened to him.”

She had an indignant tone in her voice. “So? What if I am?” 

“You know he’s not going to let it go.”

She gave another sigh before lying back against the Tree. “I know…”

“C’mon, talk to me.” I took a seat next to her.

“Thanks, but I don’t think you can help me.”

“Maybe, but you never know.”

She looked me up and down before putting her head back against the rough bark. After a few minutes, she started talking to me.

“Have you heard about what happened to me over there?”

“Bits and pieces. All I know is that you were out of commission for almost a month.”

“That sums it up; a whole freaking twenty-nine days. I slept through twenty-nine years of his life.”

“You knew that was going to happen though. I mean, not being there.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t think I’d skip out on twenty-nine years. I knew I wouldn’t be there for it, but sleeping through it? What kind of daughter does that?”

“Dashie, it wasn’t your fault.” As I expected, it had no effect.

“Dad says it, Celestia says it, you say it, Twilight, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie and Fluttershy say it, I still don’t believe it. There had to have been something I could have done to wake up sooner.”

She began to stare at the dirt between her legs, regret still in her eyes. I tried a different approach.

“Why is it such a big deal? If it’s hitting you so hard, why did you come back?”

“I’m sort of an important figure over there. I have a really important job. And unless I can access the side of me that’s already comfortable living there, it would take too long for me to fit the bill. So they told me I was coming back and we weren’t leaving ‘til I was good and ready.”

“And you didn’t want to?”

She hesitated for a moment, the words slowly coming off her tongue. “Actually, yes; part of me didn’t. As horrible as that sounds.”

“How come?”

“Tell me David, if you were in my place, and you left Dad healthy and his whole life in front of him, but you could reasonably pop back within the course of week or two, would you be willing to come back?”

“Since he’d probably still be fine, yes, I guess I would.”

“But then what if instead of going day by day like you were supposed to, you skipped almost all of it. When you’re finally in control you find out you missed it all, and on top of that they tell you they’re taking you back. And because they’re the ones who made the decision and you miss him you go along with it. But there’s always this fear that you’ll be coming home to a tombstone. You hope that he’s still alive, but you can’t know for sure.” 

“So then you come back and you see him alive and your heart jumps. But then you notice him all old and sick and…” her eyes were all watery at this point, “…and you can’t help but wonder if you could have done something if only you had been conscious.”

She looked up from the ground and right at me, a flame of anger was in her eyes now. 

“How about then?”

“I’d feel pretty bad about it.”

She nodded and went back to looking at the ground. “I missed it, David. I missed all of it.”

I tried to think of something to say, but no words would come. So we just sat there, watching the sun fall lower and lower into the horizon. It was actually very nice to watch; I was almost in a trance when her voice snapped me out of it.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For being the kid he deserves. You know, for being there for him.” Tears began to slowly roll down her cheeks, “For loving him and keeping him safe this whole time.”

She then buried her face in her hooves, muffling her cries. I began to wonder if I’d be doing this with Lucy some day, over something else. Now would be a good time to practice. I tried to console her.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” She brought her face out of her hooves and closed her eyes.

“No it’s not! I should have been there for him. At the very least I should have been awake and thinking about him.” She turned toward me, she began to sniffle. “What kind of daughter am I?” 

I gave the right answer. “A good one.”

“Yeah, right.” And once again she was looking dejectedly at the dirt. 

I didn’t really know what to do at this point. I tried to think of what dad would do, but that’s exactly why I was doing this in the first place. So I thought back to those distant memories of Snowflake, and how he’d talk to the kids who had moments like this. It wouldn’t hurt to try it his way. I got up and took a knee right in front of Dashie.

“Do you love him, Dashie?”

“You know I do.”

“Let me hear you say it, do you love him?”

“Yes, I love Dad.”

“Does he love you?”

“Maybe, I’m not so sur-”

I took her by the shoulders and raised my voice a few knobs. “Does he love you?!”

She was making eye contact with me now. “Yes! Yes, he does.”

“And did you do everything you possibly could to be there for him?”

She broke contact with me. I wasn’t about to let her relapse.

“Did you?!”

“Yes! Yes, I guess I did.” 

“And are you here now right when he needs all the love he can get from his family?”

This time she stayed focused. “Yes.”

“Then that’s all that matters, Dashie. That’s all he cares about and that’s all I care about. You were a very important part of his life. And if it weren’t for your decision to leave, he wouldn’t have found me. It’s better that you’re here now than any time else. As my Old Man once said to me when I was going through stuff, ‘It’s not your fault; none of it.’” I gave her a smile. “You got that?”

“Yes.” It worked; she was slowly growing her own.

“Alright, now give me a hug, sis.” Huh. That time it didn’t feel weird. 

She chuckled as she wrapped her forelegs around me. It was funny hugging her, just because it was weird hugging a pony. But it was eerie just how much she felt like Dad: strong and warm, like everything is completely fine with the world in that moment. When we let go, she still had the smile on her face.  

“Thank you David; for taking care of him and,” she gave me a small punch “thanks for being a good brother.”

“No problem.” I got up and we started walking home, the sun almost about to sink into the horizon.

That’s what brothers are for.