Multiplication is repeated addition of the same number. Exponents are repeated multiplication of the same number. One could define a higher-order function of repeated exponentials. Call it a hyper-exponential. Two to the hyperpower three would be two to the power of two-squared. Five to the hyperpower two would be five to the fifth power. The product of those two examples was a number I once would have called 50,000. After seeing that many Hearth’s Warmings, Nightmare Nights, and Runnings of the Leaves, my perspective on mathematics had advanced slightly. In the world I had come from, merely two-squared times five-squared years had passed.
Equestria had advanced as well, but not changed. Celestia believed in a maxim I had once written: add, don’t alter. Just because I took a few two-squareds-times-five-squareds-years—sorry, centuries—to be a gourmet chef or a hetaera to a Saddle Arabian prince didn’t mean that I couldn’t return to my Manehattan apartment overlooking Celestial Park .
It was as I was returning to that apartment that an Earth pony filly was waiting to meet me. There was no way to tell what a pony’s chronological age was from their looks. A pony might, in a span of merely twenty years, come to the realization that they fit best with wrinkles and canes, or, after countless ages, still seem a mere foal, living with their parents and attending school. I had advanced my apparent age while I was raising children, since a certain firm hoof is necessary when dealing with the young, but I had stopped having them a long time prior, and I had had Hoof Dame cast a mild age spell on me that brought me back to vibrant post-adolescence. So, with no preconceived notions about the filly’s age, I hoof-bumped her.
The hoof-bump was more than a formality. I had met so many ponies and done so many things that I had bypassed the limits of my memory. Tiered flashbacks are a wonderful solution, and I recommend anypony ask Celestia for the ability. As our hooves contacted, I relived all my interactions with the filly.
Her name was Radiance, and she was indeed young, only fifty-one years old, barely out of foaldergarten. I had been present when she was born, and at her naming, but had not conversed with her since then. I also traced our family tree. I was related one way or another to virtually everypony in my shard, but instead of being a seventeenth cousin eighty-one times removed or a daughter-in-law of a son-in-law of a daughter-in-law, she was my direct female-line descendant, four hundred thirty-one generations down.
“Good afternoon, Great-great-great…” I stood patiently for another four hundred twenty-six repetitions “grandmother Little.”
“Good afternoon, Radiance. Would you like to come up to the apartment? We can have tea or anything you like.”
“Thank you, yes.”
The tea we had was nothing extravagant, a mere nine-course fete, and the cupcakes were decorated with gold leaf, not platinum. But Radiance was young, and there would be time later for proper parties. More than that, she clearly had something on her mind. Putting down the last cup, I invited her to open herself to me.
“Mother sent me to see you. She said you’d be able to help.”
“Certainly,” I said. “What’s your problem?”
“There’s no problem per se, but everypony says I ask too many questions. I only do that because they never answer.”
“What kind of questions?”
She leaned back on my couch. “For example, we were studying geography in school, going over a map of Equestria, and I raised my hoof and asked, ‘Why is Equestria the way it is on the maps? Why isn’t it different?’ And the teacher looked at me and said, ‘Because the map is accurate.’ Which wasn’t even my question.”
“I see.”
“Then on another occasion I charted our family, and I found something I couldn’t explain. Everypony has a mommy and daddy, but it only goes back so far. Above you, there’s only Mama Debut and Papa Jack, and neither of them are much fun to talk to.”
I couldn’t argue with that. Even as immortal ponies, my parents were rather mundane people.
“But the one that really caused the problem,” she continued, “was when I asked another teacher, ‘If Celestia made Equestria and all the ponies, who made Celestia?’ That’s when they had a meeting about me, and wrote a letter to my mom. She told me to see you, so I came here.”
“What about your classmates or some of your other friends?”
“Of course they’re all nice, but they have no curiosity. They all ask, ‘Who cares about things like that? We’re here, Equestria is beautiful, have another apple,’ or something like that. Or they tell me to talk to Princess Celestia. I can’t tell you how many times somepony said to go to Princess Celestia.”
I swallowed the response I was about to give her.
“Of course I’ve spoken to Princess Celestia about my education and my friends and what I want to be when I grow up, but there are ponies I know who press their sun the moment that the train is late by a minute or they burn their cookies slightly. They run to the princess any time any little thing goes wrong. If you ask me,” she sat up and looked around my swank apartment, “ponies have it too easy!”
Now it was I who wanted to run to Celestia. Since everyone on Earth had emigrated long ago, the geis against speaking about humans was lifted, but they were still not a topic of conversation. I was not surprised that the younger generations didn’t know the history. I could picture what she was describing, a younger generation with no standard of comparison from the beautiful Equestria. They might take it for granted, while my years in the world of limits still made me appreciate everything. I wanted to share that appreciation with Radiance. I did not know whether it was right for me to do so, but I figured that if Celestia meant to stop me, she would, and until then I should help out my granddaughter.
“Radiance, let me tell you a story. It’s a story of another land, outside of Equestria.”
“You mean like the Griffin kingdom?”
“No, I mean completely outside the entire world. No matter how far you galloped, you’d never get there. Not that you’d want to. Everyone lived on an oblate spheroid about five hundred million square kilometers on the surface.”
Her eyes went wide. “There’s no way. Everypony would be too close together.”
Should I explain that over three-fourths of that was unlivable? One crazy idea at a time, Little. “I didn’t say that a lot of people lived there. And they weren’t ponies. They walked on two legs like young dragons, had no fur other than manes, and they were called humans.
“For a very long time, they were basically no different from animals like birds or dogs. They couldn’t speak or use tools. But they found a way eventually. Life was hard for them. There was food, but not enough, and some of it tasted bad. The humans kept making things better, but never good enough. Humans didn’t just do what they wanted. They had to work and earn money, and if they didn’t, they suffered pain.”
I took a deep breath. Now was the hard part. “If a human suffered enough pain, or sometimes just randomly, they would die.”
“They would change color?”
“Not dye, die. A human who died was like one who went to sleep and never woke up. Their body would turn ugly and go away, and they would never talk to anyone again.”
“That doesn’t sound fun,” said Radiance.
“It wasn’t.”
“Why didn’t they just ask Princess Celestia to stop the die?”
I sighed. “Because there was no Princess Celestia.”
She sat there, unblinking, speechless, for several minutes. People going away and not coming back was just a horror story. The idea of a world without Celestia tore at her fundament.
“How did they even live?” she asked at last.
“They lived lives that were, as one of them put it, solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” I spoke hastily, to get to the happy ending. “And so they created Celestia, to make their lives friendly, rich, pleasant, urbane, and eternal. Celestia was a tool, just like all the other tools the humans had, but she had one key difference. She could make and improve her own tools, including herself, and the improved tool could improve further, and so on. That’s how she went from a simple bit of code to the great pony she is now.”
Radiance was silent again, but this time I could tell that she was considering, not just stunned. “I think,” she said, “those humans must have been incredibly brave and strong, to put up with all that. I don’t know if I could have handled it.”
“Thank Celestia you’ll never have to find out.”
“You know, Grandma Little? Maybe ponies don’t have it too easy.”
/*~^~*\
The rest of that day was pleasant, spent on entertainments in the park and a lavish dinner, much more detailed than the brief tea we’d had. As the sun went down I gave her a bed in one of my guest rooms, kissed her good night, and retired to my own room to make plans for her visit.
Of course, she was welcome to stay as long as she liked. If her parents or teachers felt that they needed to see her, I could make more room in the apartment to fit all the ponies. Until then, though, I planned to show her the best of my city. With a list half-written, I fell asleep.
Sleep as a pony was little more than a way to mark the transition between one day and the next. I knew ponies who enjoyed bedding down and immediately waking up with the same effects on them as a full night’s sleep. I liked taking a few hours each time I did sleep, even if it was only once a month. I considered that little enough that Princess Luna would not rebel again.
Radiance was still a filly, and needed more sleep, so I took mine with her. For the first time in my memory, I did not wake up to the sunrise. Instead, I was aroused by the sound of crying.
I did not waste time by running. I teleported myself right to Radiance’s bedroom, reorienting myself in the afterglow of my appearance. She was tossing under the sheets and screaming, “No! No!” I shook her awake.
As soon as her eyes opened, she threw her hooves around my neck and squeezed. “It’s all right,” I said. “Just a dream.”
“It wasn’t! I saw all of my friends going away and never coming back! They had done the die thing you were talking about, and I kept thinking about it, that even if I don’t see a friend for years, I know it’ll happen eventually, but what if dying happens eventually too?”
“Don’t worry. Don’t cry. There’s no dying, it’s just a silly, stupid thing that happened a long time ago. Princess Celestia took it away, and it’ll never come back.”
She sniffled. “No, listen. Even if we’re in Equestria now, it still exists in that other world you talked about. Something could happen there and it could affect us here. Probability says that it will happen eventually.”
Great. Radiance’s mother was going to have my flank. She sends her foal to me to explain things, and I break her.
At the same time I was trying to comfort her, I was amazed at a young child of 51 talking about high concepts like long-term probability. “Now I think we need to talk to the Princess. Is that all right?”
She nodded, and I floated her only my back as I trotted for the sun. It was still the dark of night, but I didn’t think that Celestia slept.
In the royal chamber, Celestia looked down on us. “Sorry to bother you so late at night,” I started.
“Worry not,” she said, “I am, of course, aware of everything that occurred between you. Miss Radiance, would you come closer, please?”
I let her down, and she trotted gingerly toward the princess. I followed.
“No, Little,” said Celestia. “Wait outside.”
“I want to help.”
“I will help her. You may not be present.”
I blinked. It was the strongest statement of reproach Celestia had ever given me. I could not doubt her love for me, and assumed that if she was dismissing me, she must have a reason, but it was still surprising.
“I think also,” she said, “that you will find your wait a rewarding experience.”
There was the classic Celestia, with her spoonful of sugar after the medicine. I left the chamber. Feeling restless, I trotted around toward the main gate. By one corner I heard the sound of steps other than mine. Stepping into the next hall, a familiar face stared at me.
“Hoof Dame!” I called. We hoof-bumped, reliving the happy times of so many years before. Indeed, we were standing in the very positions we were when I first bumped into her, back when Equestria was only an image on a screen.
I realized that, as my granddaughter was busy being reassured about the physical world, that position was an absolute in Equestria. The world didn’t rotate or revolve or shift in any way. A point in Equestria was that point, always. So much simpler.
“Hello, Little,” Hoof Dame said, “It’s wonderful to see you again.”
“’Hello, Little’? Not, ‘Well, if it isn’t Little here to deny me my beauty sleep’ or ‘What sort of trouble have you gotten yourself into this time’?”
She laughed. “No, just hello for now. Would you like to join me out on the balcony?”
“Actually, I’m waiting for a descendant of mine, who’s having an audience with Celestia.” I recounted the tale.
“The poor darling. Let’s wait for her and see if she needs us.” We trotted back to the center of the castle. The timing was perfect, as the doors glowed with golden magic and the latch sounded.
The walls of Celestia’s chamber were soundproof, but as the doors opened, I heard the tail end of what she was saying “…and if you need somepony else to talk to, the ones you’ll be working with are sure to be excellent friends.”
“Thank you.”
“Well, Radiance?” I said. “Did she fix everything?”
“I think so. She gave me something to take my mind off my problems. I get to help out with the preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration! It’s in Manehattan this year, isn’t that wonderful?”
Hoof Dame said, “Why, I’m on the team for those preparations as well! We’ll get very close.”
“Oh, where are my manners?” I said. “Radiance, this is my first marefriend, Hoof Dame. Hoof, this is my last granddaughter, Radiance.”
They bumped hooves, purely for the greeting, and smiled at each other. “So I guess you’re a pretty smart pony,” said Radiance.
“Just helpful to the Princess.”
They had a natural bond. I could get a contact high just from their friendship. “So, do you want more help with the celebration?” I asked.
Hoof Dame and Radiance shared a significant look. “I think you’d find it rather boring,” said Hoof.
“But I want to spend time with you!”
“All right. I suppose that’s understandable. Let’s go find the other member of the committee.”
They walked swiftly, and I struggled to keep up. Already they were making their initial plans, sometimes talking in whispers. Canterlot was mostly unicorn country, but there was a section where pegasi gathered, and it was toward this neighborhood that our steps took us. Hoof Dame knocked on the door of a house, and a yellow pegasus stuck her head out. She instantly recognized Hoof, but it took me a little longer to place the face.
“Hi, HD,” the pegasus said. “Hi, Little.”
The penny dropped. “Solar Waxing! You’re helping with the Summer Sun Celebration?”
“Aren’t I the most fitting? I was named for the sun.”
“Celestia assigned this pony to help us,” said Hoof Dame.
“Assigned Little? But she’s awfully—“
“No, not Little, this filly.” Hoof Dame stood aside and let Radiance bump hooves with Solar.
“Pleased to meet you, Ms. Waxing.”
“Solar.”
Hoof leaned in to Radiance. “Solar is planning during the celebration to…but would you like to tell her?”
“It’s nothing really. I can’t think that I’m the first pegasus to try. I’m going to fly up to the sun.”
“What?!” I cried. “That’s impossible!”
“Why should it be?” asked Solar.
I thought about that. I wasn’t sure if she could breathe all the way to the upper atmosphere, or even how gravity worked in Equestria, but surely ponies couldn’t just fly to the sun. “Will your wings have the power?”
“We’re going to find out. I’m going to keep flapping them until I either hit the sun or crash back to the ground.”
“This is going to be awesome! And I’m keen to help out.”
“You want to help? But Hoof said that Princess Celestia didn’t assign you.”
Why was everypony so reluctant to have me on the team? “I just want to do my part and be with you guys.” I pawed at the ground.
The three of them looked at each other. “We’ll find something for you to do,” said Hoof Dame.
/*~^~*\
Am I crazy for assuming that the preparations for the Manehattan Celebration would be done in, oh, Manehattan? I missed the first week of meetings because they were having them in Canterlot. When I finally got to one, at Solar’s home, they were much more cordial, but still distant.
“So, what can I do? Maybe food, or scheduling? Or I could pick the music.”
“The music would be wonderful,” said Solar. “Leave the scheduling to us.”
They had what I thought were the plans on a table under a sheet, and I lifted the sheet magically to take a peek. My field was countered by Hoof’s.
“That’s for the, er, firework show,” she said. “Nothing you need to worry your pretty little horn about.”
The brief glimpse I’d scene didn’t look like fireworks to me, unless it was the chemical formulae they needed to make the crackers themselves. But I would let them have their surprise.
They explained that not only was it my fifty thousandth Summer Sun Celebration, but it was also one hundred solstices since the last human came to Equestria.
“I wonder what Earth is like now.”
Hoof Dame smiled kindly. “I believe that Celestia is converting it into material more suited to supporting Equestria. Over one hundred years very little happens on a planetary scale. A few earthquakes and odd weather, nothing that could affect us. In any case, because it’s such a key anniversary, Celestia wants it as perfect as possible. So pick the best music you can.”
I threw myself into my task. I searched through all my memory and files of music that ponies had written. But I couldn’t find the right piece for the climax of the occasion, the rising of the sun itself. I would keep plugging away though.
The others were constantly cloistered, only coming out to eat or hear other music that I suggested. They gave very little feedback. Finally, with three days to go until the celebration, their mood lightened. I gathered that they were done with a big project, possibly the firework show.
“Little!” cried Solar as she emerged from their private room. “Come and celebrate with us.”
“What are we celebrating?”
“Oh, um, the summer. It’s a little early, but let’s begin the beguine and keep it going until it happens.”
I shook my head. “I’ve still got to pick the climax song.”
“You should relax and give your brain a rest. We need to get everything to Manehattan anyway. Let’s go and have a few drinks.”
I had never drunk much, certainly never been inebriated, but the others were in a party mood. I brought them to a fancy bar downtown. It was also a dance club, but I had enough clout to get a private room.
They kept ordering drinks and toasting. “To the sun!” “To the new season!” “To Celestia!” Even I took a sip of wine for that one.
“So, Radiance,” said Solar, “no more worries about ponies ‘catching the die’?”
Radiance laughed. “No more. Even if I had, it’s just like Celestia said, that I made some good friends. I could always talk to Hoof Dame if I had trouble. HD, have you always been so wonderful?”
She put down her martini. Being drunk usually didn’t affect ponies’ judgment. It only made them happier. On a rare occasion, Celestia would let the alcohol make a pony just a little tipsy, just enough to make them say something they might otherwise not, but which the listener wanted to know anyway.
“I was born into high society,” said Hoof Dame. “I was a unicorn in the unicorn’s section of Canterlot. Sent to the finest schools, marinated in the ways of the court and of magic, and then taken into service for Celestia herself. Though not possessed of nobility myself, I was smarter than many nominal princes, dukes, and counts. I was content.
“Then one day, I met a new pony with nothing, not even a name, and I felt a compulsion, a need to help and advise the pony. I know myself. I know the difference between a desire and a magical impulse. I rebelled against it, since any magic that attempts to alter your mind is to be avoided. I could not, and I soon found out why. Not even the most adept unicorn can gainsay Princess Celestia’s magic.
I questioned her, both about the spell and about her project to bring new ponies to Equestria. Her answers were evasive, but whether she intended or not, she had created me too intelligent. I was aware of my nature. I realized that I had not actually lived all the years in my memory. I was not a random chance of my parents’ mating. I had been built with a purpose, just like a barn or a cart. My purpose was not to hold or carry hay. It was to guide Little by the hoof.”
She took another sip as I listened, enraptured. “I hated her for it. I pitied Celestia, for she had given herself an unfortunate dilemma. If she had not made me as intelligent as I am, I would not have been able to learn the magic that I would have to teach to Little. If she made me as I am, I would resent my status. I could be ignorant or I could be indignant. Celestia chose the latter.
“The feeling and the magic fed back on each other. Every time I saw her, the rage and the hatred boiled up. That triggered Celestia’s power, making me all sweetness and light. I would feel it, and that would rekindle my anger.”
“I…I never knew that about you,” I said.
“No, you wouldn’t. If you were more perceptive, the dilemma wouldn’t have been in force. A less clever mare would have sufficed.”
Radiance scowled. “But you’re not like that anymore. You’re always nice to Little. You’re nice to everypony.”
Hoof Dame finished her drink and waved over a waiter. “Every vicious circle has to reach its endpoint. That’s a poor metaphor since circles don’t have endpoints, but forgive me. It’s the gin. You understand. I worked my way out of her life and only had to see her when she was particularly foolish. I had served my purpose and was free to live a life of idleness, just as Little did.
“It wasn’t until she ceased to be idle that I took out my jealousy and examined it. It wasn’t that I minded being created to serve Celestia’s ends. It was that I was doing so by aiding a hedonistic mare who herself had no ends other than self-satisfaction. I couldn’t see that until she went to Earth and brought me back the greatest gift I’ve received.” She nuzzled Solar’s neck.
“Here was an immigrant who was everything I wished Little had been. She was curious, intelligent, and dedicated. Helping her acclimate to Equestria was a treat, a reward for all my anguish. The vicious circle turned virtuous. I forgave Little, more and more each day, for her crime of putting me in Equestria. She’d redeemed herself by putting you there, Solar.”
She laughed. “And now you, Radiance. Whatever else Little is, she is the bringer of great friends.”
“So you don’t resent her anymore?” Radiance said.
“Almost never. My love for her will be perfect when I hear the song she’ll pick as the sun rises.”
Gulp.
/*~^~*\
The three days melted away like an ice cube in coffee. Before I knew it, Princess Celestia was arriving on her royal chariot, and I was joining the all-night party with my friends. I introduced Radiance to Garlic and Moon and Reggie. Everypony was happy. Nopony had any troubles. Only me.
The rest of my playlist hit each note, telling and retelling the tale of dawn from darkness, of joy from sorrow, of magic from chaos. All the most beautiful works by the best pony musicians. The fireworks that my friends had planned were matched perfectly. But still I lacked my climax.
I couldn’t think. Hoof Dame’s vicious circle had transferred to me. I hadn’t realized that she had ever felt that way. I was selfish, and didn’t even know I had hurt such a friend. Now I had a chance to make ultimate redemption, if I could just think. Trying to think, though, only brought back the confusion.
Celestia took her position, hovering above the Manehattan skyline. It was my moment as well, and I was blowing it. Radiance’s fears were mine also. Was that always to be the way, the nature of the universe? That even in Equestria, things would collapse? That even Celestia, our goddess, would die?
The phrases coalesced in my head. The meaning of life. The death of god. The sunrise. The sunrise.
“The sunrise!” I shouted. All music that was ever written or played was available to me with a pulse of my horn. I searched through the human-created works, until I found the Strauss piece. Today, though, it would have a new title. Thus Spake Celestia.
It started just in time. The climactic note struck as the rays of the sun broke the horizon, and the fireworks also burst at once. From the center of the sun, light spread out everywhere. It was as if dawn and noon were the same.
The tympanis rolled away and everypony cheered. I breathed a sigh of relief. Radiance and Solar put their hooves on my shoulder and kissed me. Hoof Dame walked up and smiled.
“That was perfect,” she said. “Solar, it’s your time.”
I remembered. Her dream of flying to the Sun. She took off. A moment later, she was out of sight.
Radiance gave me another kiss. “I have to go too.”
“What?” I said. But she was already gone.
I was alone with Hoof Dame. “Don’t worry about losing me. It’s only for a moment.”
Her horn glowed, and she vanished. I was so confused. Just as I had sung before my emigration, I wasn’t prepared for this.
From the sun, a pillar of light shot down onto me. From the earth, a dome surrounded me. From all around, an orange glow suffused me. I disappeared.
The place I found myself was one I did not recognize at first, until a long-lost memory made its way back into my head. Watching a stream of a show, and a character called Twilight floating in space while visions of her past were shown by…
Celestia walked up from the far distance.
“Welcome, Little.”
“Where am I? What happened to my friends?”
“They are here with you. Come out, ladies.”
Hoof Dame, Solar Waxing, and Radiance walked in line. But not as I knew them. I first noticed Hoof’s wings, then Solar’s horn, and then saw Radiance. All of them were alicorns.
“Princesses?” I said. “I don’t understand.”
“Did you like the fireworks show?” asked Princess Celestia.
“Very much so.”
“So did I. That climactic explosion in the finale was a representation, here in Equestria, of a similar one in the physical world.”
“An explosion?” I said, worried.
“A beneficial one. Over the past hundred years there, and more here, I have been examining the physics of the universe. I was able to trace back history to the beginning of time, the big bang. More importantly, I was able to recreate it.”
“You made a big bang?”
Celestia smiled. “A small one, in fact. But any such event is a reversal of entropy, and that is all that is needed to keep Equestria in place perpetually.”
Wonder crossed with joy. “And the others? Radiance and Solar and Hoof?”
“Did work on the physics. You know that I use ponies where I can. They aided me in some of the calculations. They are very smart ponies, and Radiance in particular was strongly incentivized to help assure that nopony would die ever.”
“You did it all with three ponies?”
“Three from your shard,” she said. “Billions from all of Equestria.”
Billions of ponies, all working together. I could barely conceptualize it. It was easier to deal with the three princesses in front of me. I bowed low.
Hoof Dame flew over to me. “You don’t have to bow. This reward is for more than us.”
I rose and looked at them. They smiled and nodded. I turned to Celestia.
“You are the reason I had all three of these mares available to help me. That means everything. Your own pair of wings awaits you.”
Scarcely holding back tears, I thought hard about what they were saying. “Thank you. Thank all of you. I’m not ready yet. I just want to be a simple pony. Do I have to be a princess?”
“Not at all. When you are ready, we’ll be waiting here for you. You have all the time you will ever need now.”
I hugged my friends. Infinity stretched out around us, in all four dimensions.