Youngsters across Ponyville were preparing for their annual school outing, their homes becoming hives of nervous activity as their parents helped them get their belongings together.
Many of the adults couldn’t help feeling a little envious of their offspring – an exchange visit had been arranged with the Zebra Kingdom to build international relations and tighten bonds with Equestria.
Few ponies had ventured there, despite of how relatively close it was. The two races had regarded each other with suspicion until just recently, when Twilight and Zecora had taken it upon themselves to use their friendship as a basis to improve political links.
If this trip was a success, Ponyville would return the favour and accept a visit from fillies and colts from their kingdom.
Despite the importance of what this weekend could signify, the general atmosphere was one of excitement more than anything else. Even Twilight was taking a strictly hooves-off approach now the negotiating was done – the three days away were to be a time of fun and adventure and she no longer needed to be involved.
That didn’t, of course, prevent some from being anxious about the whole affair.
The past couple of hours in Berry Punch’s household had consisted of a constant to-ing and fro-ing of fussing and affection.
“You’re sure you’re going to be fine? You’re not going to get lonely or do anything stupid?” said Ruby Pinch, who was wearing a backpack filled with more items than were strictly necessary. The filly’s brow was furrowed. “I’m only gonna be gone a few days. You don’t need to worry so much.”
Berry Punch waved her hoof, dismissing her daughter’s concerns – although there was a slight strain in her tone when she spoke.
“Don’t be silly, Pinchy. This weekend’s all about you. I don’t want you thinking about me at home when you should be out there having fun and having new experiences. I trust Miss Cheerilee and I know you’re going to have a wonderful time.”
Ruby nodded slowly, maintaining eye contact with her mother as she waited for the inevitable “but”.
The older pony could only hold out a few seconds before she went into over-protective mode again. “You have got everything, haven’t you?” she asked, trotting over to the filly’s overburdened backpack. “Clothes in case it’s too cold, a hat in case it gets too hot, your quills and notepad – do you want to take some food? You might get hungry on the journey over.”
“Mum.” Ruby stopped her with a short but affectionate warning.
Berry hesitated for a moment, then broke out a warm but weary smile. “I know,” she said, “I’m sorry. But you can’t blame me for worrying. You know what happened during the last school trip.”
She leaned down to her daughter, her expression serious. “You keep an eye on that Applebloom and her friends. The last thing we want is for them to be releasing any more cosmic horrors.”
Ruby stifled a groan. “It wasn’t their fight that set Discord free, that’s just a lie spread by Diamond Tiara. I’m more worried about what happened in Ponyville while I was away – which you still won’t tell me anything about.”
Berry’s face flushed. “That’s because there’s nothing to tell, no matter what the rumours say.” She recovered her composure quickly. “Come on now, it’s time to go.”
She felt a pang of sadness after she said those words – she was going to miss her, even for this short while.
The pair of them stepped outside, the warmth of the Sun washing over them, and made their way to the carts that the class would be using as their transportation.
Berry gave her daughter a prolonged hug and resisted the temptation to ask Cheerilee to take particular care of her. It would have been unnecessary and could have embarrassed Ruby in front of her friends.
Then she and the other parents watched as Ponyville’s young embarked on their travels, not to be seen again until the Monday morning.
She stayed there a while even as some of the other adults moved away, looking on up the road until the carts were out of sight.
She felt an unshakeable sense of melancholy as she made her way back home. She knew it was foolish but she couldn’t help it – Ruby was her friend as much as her daughter and for the next couple of days they would be without each other.
The front door to her home creaked as she opened it, which didn’t help reduce the atmosphere of loneliness it now held.
Berry set about clearing up the items that Ruby had elected not to take with her, trying to ignore her sense of solitude. This was different to when Ruby was at school or out with friends – she was too far away to get in contact with and she wouldn’t be spending the night sleeping in her own bed.
Chores were carried out nearly and efficiently, the only sounds coming from ponies passing outside. When the house was as quiet as this, it was almost unnatural – the silence itself became a noise, a low hum that came from everywhere and nowhere.
An hour passed. Berry continued her clean-up, taking a brush in her mouth to sweep her home’s surfaces. Stray specks of dust were stirred by her work and caused her to sneeze, which sounded like an explosion compared to the peace that had come before it.
She frowned, then went to a window and checked outside. The sun was starting to set – early evening. Not too early to get out of the house and have a drink or two.
There was a restaurant/bar about a 20 minutes’ walk away that she frequented on the occasions she was able to hire a babysitter, and she had become close friends with its owner.
Horte Cuisine was a white-coated stallion with a slickly-styled blue mane, with a neat moustache on his upper lip. He was always smartly dressed and to the casual observer he could appear aloof and disdainful, while the truth was that he was simply careful.
Careful not to intervene in matters that weren’t his business, careful in who he allowed into his confidence and careful in choosing friends.
He was the opposite of what Berry had been before Ruby came along, yet they were identical in two important ways. First, they shared an irreverent sense of humour, which they discovered over the many drinks he had served her through the years.
Second, they were both unlucky in love – simply down to the fact there were no partners available.
Ponyville was unusual in the fact the number of stallions living there were outnumbered by mares by about seven to one. Berry preferred mares, so this statistical anomaly should have worked in her favour.
Unfortunately, this was not the case. In all her years living there she had only met one other pony of her persuasion, who had made it clear she wasn’t interested. Berry craved companionship but had become resigned to the fact she was unlikely to find it.
Horte Cuisine’s situation was even worse but he wasn’t as bothered about it as Berry was. He was of the opinion that the right stallion would come along eventually and until then, it was better to retain his independence.
Berry reached his restaurant and headed straight on in. As was usual for a Friday, it was busy but not crammed.
She saw him before he saw her – he was at the bar, serving a couple of mares who were taking more interest in him than he was in them.
This was another benefit of their friendship; he was never less than polite to his customers but rarely gave anything of himself away. This intrigued more than a few females, and the gossip they shared while chatting him up sometimes gave him ideas for mares Berry could try her luck with.
Ruby was going to be away all weekend and she been single too long. Berry made a resolution there and then – this was the perfect opportunity for her to find somepony. So help her, before Sunday was out she intended to score a date at the very least.
Horte Cuisine’s expression brightened as he saw her approach and the ponies he was serving moved away.
“I expected you’d be here at some time tonight. You haven’t let me down,” he said with a smile.
“Of course not,” she said. Horte nodded to his serving staff to take over his duties and moved down to the end of the bar, with Berry taking up a seat opposite him.
“So what will you have?” he asked, “Judging by the time, I presume you haven’t had a chance to eat dinner yet, so you will want something mild. A white wine, perhaps?”
She nodded and he continued speaking while serving. “And what do you have planned for this weekend? You have two days where you are unchained, free from responsibility. Should I warn Ponyville that Miss Punch is on the prowl, or are you going to take the time to relax and de-stress? The spa has several cheap offers on at the moment – you could surrender yourself to the tender mercies of Aloe and Lotus.”
He placed a full glass on the bar and Berry took a sip. “That sounds very tempting, but I can do that any time. I’ve been out of the dating game too long and I could really use some company. You got any gossip?”
He stroked his chin absently. “Alas, nopony comes to mind. There are plenty of ponies who are bemoaning their single status but I don’t think any are willing to change their sexuality. It’s too bad – most of the last lone stallions in town were snapped up at the recent Hearts and Hooves night that I held here. Which, I noted, you didn’t attend.”
Berry shrugged helplessly. “Babysitter duty. All the mums I know sent their foals round for a big play date, so they could enjoy the night. They figured I wouldn’t have plans and, of course, they were right.”
“Then we need to find you somepony. It boggles the mind that out of all the mares in town, none of them have yet succumbed to your feminine wiles.”
He put a hoof to his chest in a gesture of mock-nobility. “I will do what I can to aid you in your quest. No stone shall go unturned, no rumour unchallenged. Just try not to make the same mistake as last time – I don’t think you’ve been fully forgiven for that.”
Berry blushed and lowered her voice. “Don’t bring that up. You promised we would never speak of that again.”
He smiled, teasing her. “Of course, it was such a long time ago that I don’t think I fully remember the details. Let me see, what was it?”
He looked in the air, pretending to be lost in thought. “Ah yes, the fog is clearing. Something about a near-scandal, hastily brushed under the carpet. Alcohol was involved, wasn’t it?”
“Yes.” Berry sighed heavily, but there was some mirth hidden behind her embarrassment. “Horte, I’m warning you. Don’t dig up the past, no good can come of this.”
“It was a grand gala dinner,” he said theatrically, his hoof raised in the air. “Your eyes met hers. There was electricity in the air. You moved towards her, pausing briefly to stumble into a table. There was a conversation, the details of which you can’t remember and she refuses to repeat. And then…”
“Look, it wasn’t all my fault, okay?” she said. “She was giving off all the right signals, I thought we’d made a connection. She’d never shown any interest in the stallions in town, I thought I was onto a sure thing. It was a simple mistake, I don’t see what the problem was.”
Horte smiled and spoke in a low whisper to ensure nopony else could hear. “She was the mayor, Berry.”
“Yes, well,” she said, struggling to come up with a decent comeback. “I still think she enjoyed it on some level. She didn’t break off the kiss immediately.”
“I attribute that to shock,” he said. “But she did a very good job of covering it up afterwards. A good quality in a politician, not so much in a lover. Even if she had reciprocated, I’d say you deserve better.”
Berry almost choked on her drink. “Horte, you shouldn’t say that sort of thing about the mayor. You’ll get yourself in trouble.”
He shrugged. “Everypony’s on the same level when it comes to love. Sex is also a great equaliser. Position counts for nothing in the bedroom, so to speak. Do you think even the likes of Princess Celestia command respect when they’re deep in the throes…”
“Horte, stop!” Berry cried in horrified amusement. “You can’t talk about the princess in that way. She’s the ruler of Equestria, don’t put those images in my head. She’s noble, chaste…”
He said nothing, simply raising a wry eyebrow. Berry fell silent, then downed the rest of her drink in the hope of wiping her memory clean.
“Anyway,” she said, deliberately changing the subject. “How are we going to solve my problem? I’m not getting any younger. There has to be somepony out there for me.”
Horte fell quiet for a moment. “All joking aside, I will give the matter some thought,” he said. “If you weren’t tied down here, I’d suggest you move to San Flankcisco. You’d have no such problems there – though I would miss your company.”
Berry smiled as he poured out another glass. The bar wasn’t getting any busier, which she found unusual – perhaps the parents of Ponyville were waiting until Saturday to paint the town red. She wasn’t complaining, though. If there were any more customers then Horte wouldn’t be able to take the time out to talk to her.
“Try to make this one last a little longer,” he said, pushing the glass towards her. “I’m not going to refuse your bits, but the weekend has barely begun. I don’t want you to peak too early. Would you like some food?”
“Maybe later,” she said, tapping her hoof absently against the bar. “You know, I’ve been thinking. Perhaps I should try speaking to Bon Bon again. I know she wasn’t interested the last time, but that was months ago. I’m not sure how well we’d get on, but at least I know she’s gay so there’d be no chance of… why are you looking at me like that?”
“You really have been out of the social scene for a while, haven’t you?” he said. “I’m afraid you’ve already missed your chance.”
“What? She’s found somepony?” Berry blinked in astonishment as two thoughts collided in her brain and blew her mind. “No,” she said, dismissing the idea as impossible.
Horte gave her a knowing look, realising she had already hit upon the truth.
“No.” She repeated her denial, weaker this time. “You’re serious? It can’t be. You mean, she and Lyra…”
He nodded slowly, smirking at her bewilderment. “Sometimes if you push hard enough for something, it comes true.”
Berry shook her head. “Maybe, but wow. Bon Bon’s been after Lyra for something like two years now and there was never any sign she’d be successful. As far as I knew, Lyra just went along with it but didn’t really take it seriously. I thought Bon Bon was half-joking as well – I mean, have you seen some of the poems and stories she sent her? They ranged from ludicrous to obscene.”
“I don’t know the full story, but things were pretty much as you said. Lyra saw Bon Bon as a friend who occasionally wrote questionable things about her,” he said. “But then Bon Bon wrote a story that overstepped the mark. Overstepped it so far that the mark couldn’t be seen for dust. They had a serious falling out.”
“Oh. I’d heard something about that but I didn’t realise it was so bad. What happened then?”
“It was messy for a while. There was one night when Bon Bon came here and she got so drunk that I had to escort her out.” Horte closed his eyes and tilted his head in a semi-shrug. “Shortly after that they got together, but you’d have to ask them for the reasons why. I don’t like to pry into other ponies’ business unless invited.”
Berry exhaled, blowing air upwards into her mane. “Well, that’s an opportunity lost. Maybe I should speak to them anyway. They might know somepony they could introduce me to.”
“It’s a good idea. The more ponies you include in your social circle, the better your chances.” He smiled. “It’s a shame Pinkie Pie’s out of town. She knows everypony.”
She chuckled. “Ah, Pinkie. The scrapes she’s gotten me into. You know she insisted on throwing me a ‘coming out’ party when I discovered my sexuality? That was the night I realised what slim pickings there were round here for a mare like me.”
She stared wistfully into her wine glass. “It was another one of her parties that led to Pinchy coming along. I was so drunk that night. That said, I wouldn’t change a thing. Motherhood’s the best thing that’s happened to me.”
Horte leaned forward and smiled apologetically. “You’ll have to pardon me – I’ll leave you alone to reminisce for a moment. I want to check that everything’s okay for our guest of honour.”
Berry raised her head and blinked in confusion. “Guest of honour? What?” She adopted a jovial tone. “You’re saying there’s a customer you’d rather spend your time with than me?”
Horte scrutinised her, unsure that she was being serious, then stifled a grin. “You didn’t see her when you were coming in? You must have only had eyes for me.”
He held up a hoof to prevent her from asking any further questions, then walked out from behind the bar to go and speak to the aforementioned pony. Berry gasped when she saw who it was.
Twilight Sparkle, Equestria’s newest princess, was sitting alone at a table and reading through a heavy-looking book. The purple alicorn looked up as Horte approached and they had a brief but agreeable conversation, then he left her alone and went back to Berry.
“How did I miss her?” she said, then frowned as she took a second glance. “Hmm. I guess she doesn’t stand out as much when she’s not wearing her full regalia. She’s keeping her wings folded too, not drawing much attention to herself.”
Horte tapped her on the shoulder. “It’s rude to stare, Berry. She’s been here most of the afternoon, answering any questions the parents had about the exchange trip to the Zebra Kingdom.”
“Huh, the common touch,” said an impressed Berry, who was still watching her with rapt attention. “I’ve never really spoken to her before. What’s she like?”
“Starstruck, I see. She comes across as very caring, easy to talk to.” He stopped as a thought suddenly struck him. “Actually, she might just be…”
He shook his head to dismiss the notion and hastily corrected himself. “No. No, forget I said anything.”
“What?” Berry asked slyly, very interested in what he had been about to say. “What was it? What were you about to suggest?”
He cleared his throat, hesitant. “You see, this is the thing. From what I understand, Miss Sparkle has had no end of would-be suitors since the coronation and she’s turned every one of them away. Not only that, but I distinctly heard her say earlier that she has no interest in having a coltfriend.”
“You think she might be gay?” Berry asked, refocusing her attention back on the young alicorn.
“I didn’t say that. But there was something in her tone.” He let out a sigh, borne more out of concern than any other emotion. “You’re considering it, aren’t you? Berry, as a friend, it would be amiss of me not to tell you that this is a very bad idea.”
“You’re absolutely right,” she replied, still facing away from him. “She’s a princess. Who knows what the consequences could be if I offend her? Think of the scandal, think of the outrage. On the other hand, if I succeeded in seducing her then the results of that could be even worse. All eyes in Equestria would be on me, any time I stepped out of line could erupt into a royal incident. Not to mention the outcry if I ever broke her heart. You’re right, this is a bad idea.”
Horte sighed again. “You’re going to do it anyway, aren’t you?”
“Damn right I am!” said Berry, flashing a daredevil grin. “She’s a princess, for crying out loud! A pretty, pretty princess.”
She spoke quickly to stop him from protesting further. “This isn’t like that time with the mayor. I’ve only had one glass, I’m perfectly in control. I’ll be subtle.” She noticed his expression change. “I can be subtle. Don’t give me that look.”
He shrugged helplessly. “The best of luck, then. If the worst happens, I promise I’ll visit you in prison.”
Berry was already moving forward – Twilight looked up from her book as she became aware of the earth pony’s approach.
She spoke with an enthusiastic but humble tone. “Good evening, your highness. I just wanted to thank you for arranging today’s exchange trip – my daughter was so excited about the whole thing this morning.”
The alicorn smiled politely, though she was uncomfortable with Berry’s reverence. “I’m glad to hear it. But please, call me Twilight. I’m still much the same pony as I was before, just a little more… feathery.”
“Well, okay. Twilight.” Berry felt a slight confidence boost to be on first name terms with her already, though she figured this was how she treated everypony. “You must be pleased with how it’s going so far. Everypony involved seems very happy.”
Twilight’s response was warmer this time. “Thank you. This is just the beginning of what I hope to achieve as a princess – given time, I believe we’ll be able to build links with other nations even further away than the Zebra Kingdom, spreading harmony throughout the land. I’m still learning, of course, but I have a very good teacher.”
Berry pointed a hoof at the book she was reading. “So, is this part of your studies or are you reading for pleasure?”
“Oh, a bit of both, actually,” she said. “This is all about sociology and I’m on quite an interesting chapter about pre-conceptions and the herd mentality. It’s all about how other ponies’ views can alter your own opinion on something before you’ve even experienced it. The more you know, or the more you’ve been told, the harder it is to come to your own conclusions.”
“Right… as it was between us and the zebras.” Something clicked into place in Berry’s head. “That’s why you chose a pupil exchange trip, isn’t it? The adults already had their own ideas about what the zebras were like, but with the foals…”
“That’s exactly right. And the parents will be more open to hearing about the real Zebra Kingdom from their foals than they would from somepony in authority.”
“Pretty smart,” she said. “This must have taken a lot of time to set in motion, though.”
“It wasn’t so bad. As I said, I’m still starting out. I’m still Celestia’s student and I don’t have anywhere near the level of responsibility as the other princesses. I won’t do for several years yet.” She closed her book and placed it on the table. “Which is good. It gives me plenty of time to relax with my friends, help out in Ponyville and, well, other things.”
“Other things?” Berry shot her a knowing look. “Oh, I get ya. You must have plenty keeping you busy, right? I mean, you’ve just become the most eligible mare in Equestria – you must have suitors lining up round the block.”
Surprise registered briefly on her face, but the suggestion didn’t upset her. “I meant reading and working, actually. I’ve been asked of course, and whenever I visit Canterlot my mother always tries to set me up with somepony, but I’m not interested. I’ve got too much going on at the moment and, even if I didn’t, I don’t think I want a coltfriend anyway.”
“You don’t want a coltfriend?” Berry felt a rush of nerves, but she had to ask. “Twilight, I hope you’re not offended by me asking you this, but… what about mares?”
“What about mares?” She repeated the question blankly, then her eyes opened wide as she realised what Berry was asking.
“Oh,” she said, a simple expression of surprise.
“Ohh.” The word was elongated the second time, stretched out to encompass her sudden understanding of where the conversation had headed.
Berry looked at the wide-eyed alicorn with a growing sense of self-consciousness. Twilight’s lack of any further response was beginning to unnerve her.
The princess finally broke the silence. “It’s not really a question I’ve ever considered,” she said. “But I think the answer would be pretty much the same. I’m too busy.”
“Pretty much the same?” Berry frowned, not fully understanding. “So you do like mares? Or you like both? Or neither? If you don’t mind me asking.”
“No, I don’t mind.” Twilight said, then considered her response carefully. “I don’t think I’ve ever thought about it to any great extent. Before I came to Ponyville I was pretty much a loner. Now I have a close circle of friends and an ever-widening social circle. Getting into a relationship with somepony would be a big step and I’m not sure how it would affect everything else in my life.”
Berry relaxed, with a tinge of disappointment, as she realised she was unlikely to find romance here. “I’m hardly the right pony to talk to about relationships, but they are what you make them. Of course you have to compromise every now and again, but it’s the same in friendships sometimes. If you’re unsure what your sexuality is, you should probably try to find out. I know you’re not in any hurry, but it’ll help you to understand yourself better.”
Twilight hesitated a moment, then lifted up her book using her magic and stowed it in a saddlebag. “You’re absolutely right, and there’s no time like the present. I never miss an opportunity when it presents itself.”
Berry took a step back in astonishment. “Wait, what? Really? You want to go out with me?”
Twilight was so flustered that her first answer was barely comprehensible. Her second answer was only slightly more coherent. “You’re gay? I didn’t realise… I thought… I thought you were just making conversation. That wasn’t what I meant at all, I was just going to go home and read. I was going to take the opportunity to study. I have a book about… well, you know.”
She couldn’t help but feel a little crestfallen. “Oh. Okay.”
Twilight calmed down, her eyes now showing sympathy. “I’m sorry. I’m a bit clueless when it comes to picking up signals.”
She waved her hoof. “Don’t worry, I was just asking. No need to make a fuss or anything. But, um, if you ever change your mind then the offer’ll still be open.”
Twilight blushed. “I’ll, I’ll think about it. If I ever decide to put theory into practice then…” She cleared her throat, uncertain how to finish her sentence, then turned to go. “It was good to meet you, Berry Punch.”
Berry watched her leave, disappointed but not totally unhappy with how their conversation had ended. As she stood staring at the exit, she caught the eye of another pony who was heading for the door, somepony she didn’t recognise.
The other pony noticed she was looking at her, shot her an angry glare, then left.
Berry was confused by her seeming hostility and decided it was best to go back to the bar, where Horte was waiting.
He gestured to a plate of food on the counter. “Made you a roast vegetable sandwich. Also took the liberty of refilling your wine glass too, just in case things didn’t go well.”
“Thanks Horte,” she said with a smile. “Always looking out for me. It didn’t go as bad as it could have done, it just didn’t end in a result. And she knew my name, that’s something.”
She sighed. “You know, things were so much easier when I was into stallions. All you had to do was ask them and nine times out of ten they’d say ‘eeyup’.”
“I will have to take your word on that,” said Horte, with a weary tone that seemed to invite pity.
“Aw, Horte. Don’t go soft on me,” she said warmly. “If I was a stallion, I’d go out with you.”
A thought passed through her mind and she laughed. “You know, Twilight is a high-level magic user. I’m sure she’d be capable of a gender swap spell. It would be incredibly weird but the option’s there.” The expression on her face indicated that she wasn’t being serious. “Just saying.”
Horte chuckled. “Quite the invitation. But I wouldn’t be willing to become a mare, not even for you. It would be too great a sacrifice.”
They talked into the night. Twilight came up as a topic of conversation a couple of times, during which Horte made some quite inappropriate comments about wingspan.
The night soon came to an end and closing time arrived. Berry said her goodbyes and walked out into the dark street, a cold wind blowing in the air.
There was barely anypony around and the town had fallen quiet. She increased her pace, keen to get back into the warm.
There was a rustle of movement from an alleyway right next to her and she stopped in her tracks. She paused there a while, scrutinising the area. Nothing there. But she could have sworn she saw somepony.
“Hello?” she called. Her question went unanswered.
She moved on, convincing herself it had just been a mouse or something equally as harmless.
But she was feeling slightly vulnerable, even though she knew how silly that was. Ponyville was crime free and there was nopony here who would wish her harm.
Her home awaited. Her warm bed. But she would be alone, and that was something she wasn’t used to.
She was a very social creature and other ponies’ company made her feel at ease. With Pinchy away, her house wasn’t quite the same.
There was no reason to be alone, she told herself. It was a relatively long walk at this time of night and Horte’s restaurant had plenty of spare rooms for paying customers who wanted to stay over.
So she turned tail and knocked on his door. He was surprised to see her but he had a room available at a very reasonable rate.
Berry spent the night there. When she woke up the next morning. The uneasiness that had gripped her before was gone.
She attributed it to the wine. After all, she had no other reason to be paranoid.