//------------------------------// // Crossing The Rubicon // Story: My Little Teelo: Masquerade // by Ardwolf //------------------------------// In which we learn that loyalty and wisdom are oft uneasy bedfellows. Rådgiver Sannheten grunted quietly as he adjusted his harness, the well tended leather creaking in counterpoint to his joints. He cracked his neck as he straightened, contemplating the pending arrival of the Dronning. According to the Kongen she would only be present for three months, returning to her own world before the first snow. The purpose of her visit, also according to the Kongen, was to learn the language and customs of the trolls, and to form a bond with them, just as she had with the ponies. The councilor was not convinced such a thing was possible, yet the Kongen had made him swear an oath to do whatever it took to make it happen—a most daunting task, indeed. He smelled Alene Avgrunn’s subtle hand at work. The Kongen was far too straight-forward to think of it himself. The Dronning was an enigma to the old troll. All he knew of her came from wild (and second hand) stories told by ponies and the reports given by Alene Dalen and Snøskred Mot Lyn. Oddly enough, Alene Avgrunn had made no report, and that made Sannheten uneasy. The Kongen, of course, was useless. He seemed utterly smitten with the Dronning, singing her praises at every opportunity—which did not please his new wife in the slightest. Sannheten snorted. If the Kongen’s viewpoint was to be trusted then the Dronning was a troll in the ridiculously tiny body of a human, whatever that might be. From the physical description given by Alene Dalen she weighed less than half the Alene himself, and stood no taller. The Kongen had publicly said she looked like she were made of sugar crystal. Tiny and fragile, he’d called her. Yet supposedly she had defeated Discord in single combat and engineered Tišina’s fall, thwarting an ancient prophecy in the bargain. Sannheten shivered. There was no denying the Dronning was skjebne født—one of rare creatures not subject to the whims of fate. What it might mean for the World Below was impossible to say. The skjebne født could be either a blessing or a curse. More often than not they were both. But above all else they were impossible to control. Trolls found things they could not control unnerving at best. Too often in the World Below being out of control meant death soon followed. To know a creature was not even under the control of destiny itself was absolutely terrifying. They could do anything… The Dronning had already made ponies into a new troll clan and that was something Sannheten would have sworn was impossible. I must find a way to control her. Or the World Below is doomed, he thought grimly as he stalked toward the Borgen to begin his day. ooOoo Two hours before dawn Pinkie Pie’s eyes snapped open and a wide grin split her face. She sprang out of bed and landed on the floor without a sound, crouching as she looked left and right to see if anyone was watching her. Satisfied no one was, she slipped stealthily out of her room and snuck downstairs, slinking like a cat. Making her way to the backroom she took a deep breath, and then crouched, shoulders low and rump high. Her tail whipped back and forth, like an annoyed cat, as she counted down silently to herself. When the countdown reached zero she exploded into motion, bouncing around the room like a demented rubber ball. An observer would have been astounded by both the silence and the sudden appearance of tables, complete with colorful tablecloths, place settings and centerpieces. Streamers appeared as if by magic, and a number of banners followed. Had the hypothetical observer the ability to view reality in slow-motion they would have seen a ferocious scowl on Pinkie’s face, her eyes narrowed in intense concentration, her forelegs in constant motion as items appeared from nowhere in her hooves. The walls started sprouting party games and the tables began to fill with food and drink. With a final somersault that carried her backward over the large central table she landed with silent grace on her rear hooves and set a brimming punch bowl down in the middle of the table. Leaping away in a stylish pirouette she landed with forelegs held high, and clicked the stopwatch that had appeared in one hoof. “Party-no-jutsu, Pinkie Pie style!” She announced happily. She consulted the stopwatch. “Darn it!” She groused. “Missed my record by a whole 7 seconds! I must be outta practice.” She trotted over, grabbing a vanilla and strawberry swirl cupcake. She took a bite, chewing contemplatively. Then she nodded solemnly and stuffed the rest of the cupcake in her mouth, chewing with closed eyes and a blissful expression. She swallowed noisily. “Oh well, I’ll just have to try again when Teelo leaves. I’ll practice every day and beat my record for sure!” ooOoo Fluttershy rose an hour before dawn, the same way she did every day, to tend to her animals. But today there was an even larger smile on her face. The sight of Angel curled up in his fluffy blanket on the couch made her silently creep past on her way to the kitchen. The sound of steady snoring from the upstairs guest bedroom was a comforting background noise to the yellow pegasus. She soon had the morning meals laid out for her animals, who appeared as if by magic. All except Angel, of course. But she was feeling in such high spirits she decided to let him sleep in. The morning feeding complete she started cleaning up the house. She sang to herself as she worked. The various animals keeping her company listened in relaxed poses on perches and furniture. A few minutes past dawn found Angel grumpily hopping toward the kitchen. As he passed Fluttershy she called out to him. “Teelo’s coming back to Ponyville today, Angel! I’m sure she’d really like to see you again. Are you sure you won’t come with me to meet her?” The rabbit sniffed and waved one dismissive paw as he continued on toward the kitchen and his breakfast. Fluttershy sighed heavily, and returned to her cleaning. She didn’t notice the snoring had stopped abruptly. Upstairs her boarder lay staring up at the ceiling with wide eyes, a single drop of sweat rolling between his mismatched antlers. ooOoo Earth, Saturday morning, May 28, 2013 12:53 AM “Hey, Teelo. Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. O’Gara.” Emma strode forward. “Hello, Sun Hammer. My name’s Emma Halstead, I’m Teelo’s best friend.” Teagan and her parents were gaping at Emma like she’d grown a second head. “Pleased tae meet ye, Emma,” Sun Hammer nodded. “A take it Teelo talked aboot me then?” “A little. But you told me more than she did.” “Eh? Wit blether be this? A’d remember if we e’er met lass, so A would,” Sun Hammer responded in a confused voice. “Tis nae laik A ken so many humans A’d forget ain.” “What are you doing here, Emma?” Teelo asked, face white. “And how did you get in?” Elaine asked sharply. Emma glanced at her. “The backdoor key under the flowerpot, Mrs. O’Gara. You showed it to me yourself, remember?” She turned back to Teelo. “After talking to all your little friends there was no way I was staying away.” “Little friends? What are you talking about?” Teagan asked, staring at her friend in complete bewilderment. “Your keepsake, Teelo! Princess Celestia enchanted the figurines. If you ask them a question they come to life and answer it. You did know that, right?” “Enchanted? Wha—they talk?” “Aye, lassie. Dinnae the Princess tell ye?” Sun Hammer asked in a surprised tone. “No. She never did,” Teagan said numbly. “You talked to them, Emma?” Her friend nodded. “All of them. Of course I could only ask each one a couple of questions before their magic ran dry. Princess Celestia said the magic recharges at sunrise so you’ll be able to see for yourself. Or you would, if you weren’t going back to Equestria.” “You know about Equestria?” John asked Emma, studying her curiously. She nodded. “Teelo told me. My Little Pony, the magical land of Equestria. The others mentioned it too. Although I have to say he sure doesn’t look like a cartoon,” she gestured at Sun Hammer then turned her attention back to Teelo. “So now that the cat’s out of the bag you don’t have to keep anything secret anymore, Teelo. You know I won’t tell anybody. Who would believe me?” “I can’t believe you did this,” Teagan was a bit upset with her friend, but a treacherous part of her was relieved. “Equestria isn’t always a nice place, okay? It’s dangerous.” Emma snorted. “It’s full of little ponies, Teelo! How dangerous can it be?” She looked at Sun Hammer for a moment. “Although I must admit I’d never call your friend little. Are they all as big as him?” “Nae, maist hae withers jus’ up tae me belly. A was blessed with big bones, so A was. O’ course Applejack tells me her brother’s near as big as me, so we’re nae as rare as all that,” Sun Hammer said with a smile. “Mind ye, Equestria can be a wee bit dicey in the mair interestin’ parts, an’ that’s nae lie.” “Dicey, he says.” Teagan barked a short laugh. “That’s one way to put it. Emma, the place is crawling with monsters! Not to mention gods—who are often insane. Or demon-posssessed. Or both. And now Sun Hammer tells me there’s some kind of undead creature plotting to enslave an entire empire lurking around up north.” “Oh right. Like they’d have stuff like that in a cartoon for little girls,” Emma scoffed. “Equestria is not a cartoon!” Teagan nearly shouted. “There’s a cartoon about it, but it’s a real place, with real monsters. Who wouldn’t think twice about eating you!” “Then why are you going back?” Emma asked. “You said it was for summer school. What kind of school is it? A magical school like Hogwarts, maybe? Can you cast spells?” Emma waved her arm like she was holding a magic wand. John started laughing. Emma glared at him which caused Teagan to snicker. “Well, how am I supposed to know? My best friend’s been keeping secrets and wouldn’t tell me squat. Speaking of which, how much of what you told me in January was actually true?” She wheeled on Teagan, who sobered. “Every word, Emma. I swear. I’ve never actually lied to you. I may have stretched the truth here and there but everything I said was essentially true.” “Diplomatic plane, Teelo?” Emma asked sarcastically. “That was a lie.” “No.” Teagan shook her head. “That was misdirection. I never actually said I was on a diplomatic plane, only that they’re never searched. Which is true. Would you have believed me if I’d told you a crazy, demon-possessed god from another dimension kidnapped me to a magical land of ponies ruled by a princess who looks like a winged unicorn?” Emma opened her mouth, and then closed it again. Teagan nodded. “Exactly. You’d have been insulted that I was making up such a stupid story. I’d never lie to you, Emma. Do you know how hard it’s been not being able to tell you? And when I could, I had to be—creative. My friends are in the government. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna rule Equestria. They would be in trouble if the U.S. found out about Equestria—and so would I and so would my parents. Discord was crazy, and he did threaten to torture Fluttershy to death. He did hurt a lot of my friends by hitting them with lightning. I was on the edge of it, so it just stunned me. He tried to cut Celestia into pieces with animated barbed wire!” “Did you really try to kill him?” Emma asked quietly. Teagan nodded. “Princess Celestia knocked Crush aside at the very last second. I missed him by this much.” She held her fingers an inch apart. “He’d be dead right now if she hadn’t.” “You said you broke something important,” Emma said. “His neck,” Teagan responded, nodding again. “It paralyzed him.” “So what happened to him in the end? You said he was in a coma?” “Actually, they healed him and then put him in a deep sleep. And then they turned him to stone,” Teagan said. “Forever.” “Harsh,” Emma said, blinking. “How long til you leave?” “About two hours,” Teagan said after glancing at her watch. “That gives you enough time to tell me the whole story then,” Emma said, settling onto the carpet. “You owe me that much.” Teagan sighed. “I guess I do.” ooOoo Earth, Saturday morning, May 28, 2013 2:49 AM “And then we came home,” Teagan said, carefully not mentioning the backpacks full of gems Celestia had given them. “You know, if Sun Hammer wasn’t sitting right next to you I’d be calling you a liar,” Emma said, shaking her head. “That’s the most unbelievable story I’ve ever heard. No wonder you’re obsessed with your Krav Maga stuff. So Matt went with you, huh? How’d he react?” Teagan snorted. “Like he was in Topeka instead of Equestria. I kid you not. Not a single freak out. Meeting Sun Hammer didn’t faze him. Crossing the Bridge of Days? Meh. Meeting with trolls? Like he grew up with them! It was extremely annoying.” “Aye, Matthew be a calm cuddy, and that’s a fact,” Sun Hammer chuckled. “When Tišina ambled aff from a fall that shoulda left her flatter than a bunnet an’ the rest o’ us were gaping like foals, Matthew took that thunder stick o’ his an’ started shootin’ laik he were havin’ a bit o’ target practice. Ne’er did see him fashed.” “Yeah. He was all been there, done that, what’s the big deal?” Teagan chuckled. “But boy were we lucky to have him on the glacier when the storm hit. He kept us all from panicking. I thought Rainbow Dash was gonna lose it in the snow cave. She’s big-time claustrophobic.” “I can’t believe the Troll King wanted to marry you,” Emma said, grinning. “I wish I could have seen your face.” “Twere a uncommon scary sight,” Sun Hammer chuckled. “A dinnae ken her face could be the same color as her hair, by Celestia’s rainbow mane. A thought sure the Kongen was a goner, so A did.” “Well, to be fair, he didn’t want to marry me, he thought he had to, to keep the throne,” Teagan propped her back against Sun Hammer, wriggling a bit to get comfortable. “And that’s another thing. You’re really a queen?” Emma asked excitedly. Teagan nodded ruefully. “Yeah. That’s the reason I’m going back. So I can learn Trollish customs and language and all the thousand other things I have to know. Thank God Fjell rules the kingdom. If I actually had to rule the World Below heaven help the trolls.” She shuddered. “So they call you Your Majesty and all that stuff?” Emma asked, grinning. “Uh huh. It’s not as much fun as it sounds. Actually, they usually say Dronning instead of Your Majesty, but it’s basically the same thing.” “Wow. You’re a hero and a queen, Teelo! That’s amazing.” “I guess. I didn’t ask for any of it, you know. I was just trying to help my friends and stop Discord so I could go home. Crush didn’t mention the side order of kingdom was included at no extra charge.” Teagan grimaced. “Why won’t you ever let anyone touch Crush?” Emma asked curiously. “Because Crush won’t let anyone but me lift it,” Teagan replied. “Can you imagine the publicity if somebody found out? It would be proof that magic is real and unicorns actually do exist and your favorite fantasy creatures are alive and well the next universe over!” She shivered. Just then a chime sounded from Sun Hammer’s saddlebag. “Tis near time, lassie. Be ye ready?” Sun Hammer asked. He fished the stone out and dropped it gently on the carpet. It was flashing slowly. “We hae aboot five minutes nou.” “I’m ready. Emma, I’ll see you in the fall. Would it be selfish to say I’m glad I was able to tell you everything?” “Nope,” Emma grinned. “Even though it took magic to make it happen.” “You be careful, Teagan,” Elaine said seriously. “Come home safely.” “I’m not going to go hunting trouble, Mom,” Teagan assured her mother. “I want a boring summer. It’ll be a nice change of pace.” “Bye Pumpkin.” John hugged his daughter. “Remember, you can’t afford to be late coming back.” “Don’t I know it,” she said ruefully, picking up a good-sized backpack and slipping into it. “That’s all you’re taking?” Emma asked, surprised. “For the whole summer?” “Queen, remember?” Teagan grinned. “They’ll give me whatever I need.” “Nice,” Emma nodded. The conversation lapsed as everyone waited for the stone to finish counting down. When it did a chime sounded and the stone stopped glowing. Teagan picked it up and slipped it back into Sun Hammer’s saddlebag. Emma was staring at the Bridge when it opened a few seconds later. A hole appeared in mid air and rapidly expanded until the rainbow-edged opening was seven feet across. On the other side Emma could see a clearing. Early morning light streamed through the portal. Thirty feet away she could see a black unicorn, about the size of a Shetland pony, with a mane and tail of sparkling silver. Its eyes were closed and a grimace of effort contorted its face. The slender black horn on its forehead was surrounded by a bright aura of silver light. “Bye! See you in September!” Teagan called as she and the pony trotted toward the opening. Without warning Emma lunged into a sprint toward the portal, passing through it just behind Teagan and Sun Hammer. John struggled to his feet and managed one step before the Bridge snapped shut with a pop. “Damn,” John swore mildly, as he stared where the Bridge had just been.