//------------------------------// // Friend Zone // Story: Friend Zone // by Venficus //------------------------------// I like this girl so much, She’s always on my mind, We have an awesome time, We never cross the line She don’t wanna mess up the friendship, Friendsies, I’m in a frenzy Cause my bedroom’s empty And I’m gently attempting to win her over By being as good a friend as I can be She’s tempting but riddled with doubt Friend Zone is like the Mafia, You’ll NEVER get out! Rainbow Dash was undoubtedly the most awesome mare to ever grace Ponyville. She was the only living filly to perform the legendary Sonic Rainboom, The Element of Loyalty, and the fastest Pegasus around. She was also feeling very not awesome at the moment. Why, you may ask? Well, the Great Rainbow Dash is feeling generous, so yes, you may. “I mean, what does she even see in the bastard? He’s not so great. With his fancy magic and multiple degrees…I’m ten times more awesome than him! …..Okay, he’s smart. An egghead. A unicorn. Like her. One more thing he is that I’m not..? In the friend Zone.” Rainbow faceplanted against the self crafted cloud table with a sigh of annoyance. “Why do you let her get to you like this, Rainbow? You are THE Rainbow Dash! Future Wonderbolt and the most amazing pony in Ponyville! …And very much single because you can’t move past a crush. Bleh. May as well get some flying in to clear my head.” The clear breeze did wonders for her mood as Rainbow leapt out of her cloud home through her custom-made-on-the-spot flight window (also known as jumping through the wall). Soaring through the evening sky, she closed her eyes, feeling the smallest hints of a smile twitching at the corners of her mouth. The wind sung a song of freedom and her heart beat in tune as she spun and looped around clouds in the brilliant twilight sky. Judging her distance from Ponyville to be sufficient, she closed her eyes. With a resounding boom, she left an explosion of color to behind her, adding her own touch to the beautiful scenery. Her mouth broke into a grin as she let out an unheard whoop of elation, her mood lifted from her previous funk. She suddenly smirked, getting an idea as she turned back toward Ponyville, leaving a radiant light stream of colors trailing in her wake. With a lighthearted laugh, she made a arcing rainbow over Ponyville, before turning and making another faint rainbow right underneath the first as her speed slowed. With a showy flutter of wings, she made her landing in the town square amid applause from her fans. “Rainbow Dash, that was AWESOME!” “It’s so pretty!” “It’s a double rainbow….what does it MEAN? It's so bright....so vivid!” “You’ve really outdone yourself this time, Rainbow. You’re getting better and better at doing the Sonic Rainboom. I’m surprised the Wonderbolts HAVEN’T recruited you yet.” Wait…she knew that voice. A brilliant smile lit her face… Only for it to vanish at the sight of her crush, Twilight Sparkle, next the unicorn stallion she despised more than anything in Equestria. His midnight black mane was immaculately groomed, and his likewise black coat was a glossy black. His eyebrow was raised in expertly concealed annoyance as he gazed at her, sparking a far more noticeable reaction from Rainbow as her heart began to beat loudly in her chest as her hooves trembled. Whether it was the rage or sadness, she wasn’t sure, but her eyes narrowed as she instinctively went into a fighting pose. Get AWAY from her you bastard son of a bucking MULE, or I will kick your FLANK from here to Canterlot, and all the way to hell! “Rainbow Dash! What are you doing? Stop that this instant!” The awe in Twilight’s voice had vanished, only to be replaced by anger. “I don’t know what you have against Night Shade, but stop it and work it out like responsible ponies, or leave us alone!” “But Twilight, he…!” A second look at him revealed his annoyance had vanished and he wore a look of innocent bafflement. Rainbow felt her chest clench as her face grew red with rage. A little known fact about Pegasi was that like unicorns, they had innate magic talent. While Unicorns had telekinesis, pegasi had the power to affect the sky and weather. The greater their affinity, the more power over the sky they had. It is rumored that Commander Hurricane himself was able to create tornados in his rage with naught but a flap of his mighty wings, and create high pressure pockets in battle to disorient his foes. Unknown to Rainbow, as her face grew redder and her anger grew, the air around her grew heavy as the sky darkened. Her heart beat in her chest as her hooves dug into the ground. Everyone in the square watched in tense silence, feeling as though the air was weighing them down as they watched the Elements of Loyalty and Magic stare each other down. “….Fine. Goodbye, Twilight Sparkle. I’d hate to interrupt your DATE.” Rainbow spat, her elated mood hurled to the ground at Mach speed, and buried under five tons of rock after being savagely beaten to death. Without another word, she shot up into the air, heading as far out of town as she could get...also known as the Apple farm. “I’m sorry about that, Night…She’s been acting aggressive and unpleasant since I introduced you. Are you sure you two have never met?” Twilight blushed, looking at her coltfriend apologetically. He flashed her a winning smile. “Don’t worry about it. Some ponies don’t react well to change, and finding your special somepony is a big change, isn’t it?” He nuzzled her neck, making her blush as he hid his smirk. Not today, Pegasus. Deal with it. This unicorn is mine. “Anyway, back to that book you were telling me about?” Twilight snapped back to reality, turning red as she looked around and remembered where they were. “O-oh yeah. A-anyway, I’m only half way through it, but I’m not sure what to expect anymore. I mean, villains who can match an alicorn for power aren’t uncommon in stories, but for Commander Conflict to utterly negate all magic around him, even a Princess’...he seems overpowered, and he’s not even the main villain. And don’t get me STARTED on how suspicious the Night Guard is…” Rainbow arrived at the apple farm in a foul mood, something Applejack noticed right off. “Well, sugercube, you seem to be in ah bit of a huff. What’s going on?” “Twilight-bucking-SPARKLE and that THING she’s been attached to for the last several weeks. Something about him just rubs me the wrong way, but she won’t listen to me, Applejack!” Applejack blinked. Normally, Rainbow took a bit of convincing to share what her problem was, but the last few weeks, she had been getting steadily more volatile. Better be careful… “What’d she do now? And ya know, you should be happy she found her own special somepony. I’ve not once heard to tell her you were happy for her, sugercube. I know it’s hard; her bein’ all antisocial with everyone but him, but ain’t all young love like that? She probab’ly don’t even know she’s doin’ it. You gotta be more understandin’ Rainbow. Every time you see the two of them, you get all cold and angry. Yah need to let it go and accept that she’s living her life to the fullest. Sure, she’s busy now, and hasn’t hung out with us in….a couple weeks….but that’s no reason ta get all moody.” Rainbow let out an inarticulate noise of frustration. “You don’t GET it, Applejack! He’s TAKING her from us! And no one but me is trying to DO anything about it! Three weeks from now, she’ll have forgotten we even matter, and she’ll leave with him, just wait and see!” A harsh shove broke Rainbow from her rant, bring her focus back to Applejack, who was glaring at her in disappointment. “So that’s it, ain’t it, Rainbow? You don’t like it that you aren’t the center of attention. Yer jealous that somepony that isn’t you is taking everyone’s attention. You can’t be happy for your friend because she’s ignoring your jealous flank? I’m disappointed in you, sugercube. I honestly thought you were better ‘n that. I think you need to go, Rainbow. Go home and think about what it means to be a true friend. Once you figure that out, come back and we’ll talk about how you can say sorry to Twi for trying to ruin her relationship.” Rainbow felt tears prickling at her eyes. “You….don’t understand, Applejack. Why won’t you listen to me..?” “Don’t bother turning on the waterworks. It don’t suit you, sugercube.” Applejack said, turning away. A small sob was the last thing she heard from Rainbow before a rush of wind signaled her departure. Applejack turned, watching the cyan mare fly away. “Maybe I was a bit too harsh. I ain’t never heard Rainbow cry before…” Rainbow wiped her eyes as she flew. Even Applejack doesn’t get it. Why does no pony get it? Why does everyone just assume I’m jealous? Who else could I talk to? Who else could understand? Not Pinky, she’s too random. Fluttershy is too timid…I guess….that leaves HER… Rainbow sighed, landing quietly and sneaking around in the growing shadows, keeping an eye out for two particular ponies. “Rainbow Dash, what are you doing sneaking around like that…?” Rainbow jumped in surprise as Spike popped up behind her. “Spike! Be quiet! I’m trying to avoid Twilight and….” Rainbow swallowed the rising feeling of anger and continued, “Night Shade.” “Then you should probably go the other way from me, because I’m following them. Twilight’s been…not herself lately. She’s jumpy and spacing out all the time. She’s more obsessive than ever, and she gets mad at me if everything’s not perfect. I don’t like this, Rainbow. Twilight’s changing, and it’s not a good change.” “Don’t tell Applejack that…she told me I was jealous, and that I needed to get over it.” Rainbow whispered, looking around. “I agree with you, Spike, but no one will listen to me.” “Same. I tried telling Rarity, but she said pretty much the same thing and kicked me out of the Boutique. Me!” Rainbow felt her heart sink as her idea of talking to the fashion obsessed pony crashed and burned. “No one is listening to us, Spike…maybe we should give up.” Rainbow felt a sharp pain in her chest as the words left her lips. Give up…give up on Twilight. A part of her rebelled at the idea, screaming that Rainbow Dash doesn’t give up; she was too cool to give up. But another part of her repeated back Applejack’s words. Rarely did Applejack’s advice steer her wrong… “Shhh! There they are, Rainbow. Twilight said they were going stargazing tonight.” Spike whispered urgently, pointing to a spot nearby. Twilight and Nightshade sat on a blanket, a telescope and a collection of books in front of them. Rainbow noticed with a flare of anger that they were close enough to brush against each other with the smallest movement. “The night sky is beautiful, isn’t it? Luna’s really amazing…” Twilight said, her tone awestruck. “Not as beautiful or amazing as you, Twilight Sparkle. You make even the brightest Star look dim in comparison. Luna may be a princess, but you…You are the Element of Magic. Magic is your job, and you are amazing at it.” Night Shade’s honeyed words were like poison to Rainbow’s ears. Each word killed her friend, her Twilight just a little more. Soon, her Twilight would die, and all that would be left is something that LOOKED like her. But Rainbow would know. Rainbow would always know. And she knew she was helpless to stop it. “You say the sweetest things, Night. But Luna is a princess. There’s no way I could compare to her.” Rainbow could almost hear the blush in her crush’s voice. It sickened her as Twilight leaned her head over to rest against Night Shade’s shoulder. “She was born a princess, Twi. You…you could be a princess by your own merits. You don’t need wings and a horn to be worthy of the title of princess. Princess Twilight Sparkle, ruler of Magic.” Twilight giggled, turning to look at Night Shade. Rainbow considered herself a fan of horror stories and ghost stories, but nothing she had ever seen or heard had prepared her for the sinking horror she felt as she watched their heads getting closer. No…nonononono! Don’t, Twilight! Please….don’t…! Don’t break my heart…! Not like this! DON’T KISS HIM! Her mental pleas fell on deaf ears as the two’s lips met. Despair. Crushing despair. It felt like a cold was slowly consuming her core. It wilted her wings as her heart stopped for a moment. Her legs gave out as she collapsed, never taking her eyes off the kissing couple. “No…no Twilight…He’s….he’s killed you. You let him get you…how…how could you do this to me, Twilight…?” Her words came out as whimpers as her vision grew blurred. “Rainbow…? Rainbow! Rainbow, what’s wrong? What do you mean, ‘He’s killed you’? Rainbow, Speak to me!” Spikes voice grew louder and louder. “Spike..? Spike, what are you….Rainbow! Spike! What the buck are you two doing?! Are you two SPYING on me now? I expect this kind of thing from Rainbow, but you too, Spike?!” Twilight’s voice was livid. It was also getting closer. Rainbow Dash felt numb. She stood up, her head hanging. A sharp poke to her chest nearly knocked her down, but she dare not look up, the image of the Kiss seared into her mind. I’m in the friend Zone. And soon, I won’t even have that. Stupid bucking Rainbow Dash. What a fool. What could a mare like her ever want with a mare like me? She’s straight as a bucking line. A fool. That’s what I am. A bucking fool. “And you, Rainbow. Are you THAT against me being happy? Are you that jealous and petty? Can you not handle not being the center of attention? I thought you were a better friend than that. Obviously I was mistaken.” Something inside Rainbow snapped at Twilight’s harsh words. Her wings flared and a sky that was clear moments ago became clouded over and dark as lightning flashed. “Nopony understands. Nopony listens to me. How are you being any better than me, Twilight Sparkle? You tell me that and maybe I’ll listen to you. Until then, good riddance, and BUCK you.” A thunderclap sounded as Rainbow exploded into motion, taking to the sky, where she did a ninety degree direction change, leaving a muted rainboom in her wake. Rainbow was furious. It felt strange. They say nature abhors a vaccum, and so Rainbow felt her hollowness inside turn to rage as the sky reflected her inner turmoil. “Buck you, Twilight Sparkle. Buck you and the bucking train you rode in on.” Rainbow landed in a nearby field, and ground her hooves into the dirt. Lightning flashed and struck the ground nearby as she grit her teeth. “WHO THE BUCK NEEDS YOU ANYWAY, TWILIGHT SPARKLE?! Go back to Canterlot for all I care! I’m done. I’m done with this pure and utter BULLSHIT! Element of Loyalty? Give it to Spike. I don’t need it. Ponyville can bucking BURN for all I care!” Her words echoed hollowly in her mind as she turned, looking at a nearby tree. In her rage, she ran over and bucked it with all her might. The tree didn’t move. Break. BREAK, I SAID! I said, BREAK!!! She turned and glared hatefully at the tree, willing it to burst into flames, to wither and die, to do SOMETHING to submit to her rage. As if to answer her call, lightning flashed down striking the tree as she leapt away in shock. The tree splintered, its bark scorched. Something in Rainbow’s mind seemed to wake up as she laughed. Something ancient and long forgotten in the mind of all pegasi, something they had barely scratched upon in weather training. With a flourish, she pointed at another tree. Obediently, a lightning bolt leapt down from the sky, eager to do her bidding. “Lightning. I can control lightning. How bucking cool is that. I bet Twilight would just LOVE to study that. Too bad for her.” Rainbow spat out. Lightning struck the ground. “Dear Twilight Sparkle. How do I hate thee? Let me count the BUCKING ways.” Rainbow mocked, quoting one of the books Twilight had convinced her to read. It seemed so stupid now. “I hate that you make me read books.” Crack-boom! A scorch mark on the ground. “I hate that you launch into egghead speeches at any given moment.” Crack-boom. Roasted tree. “I hate that you lecture ME on being a bad friend when you’re just as bad.” Crack-boom. “I hate that you’re straight.” Crack-boom. “I hate that you look adorable when you geek out at the strangest things.” Crack-boom. “I hate your obsession with books.” Crack-rumble. “I hate that you make my heart beat faster on sight.” Crack. “I hate that never once have you considered mares in your dating adventures.” “I hate that that you fascinate me.” “I hate that you make me emotional.” “I hate that you made me like you.” “I hate that I’m in the friend zone.” “I hate…..I hate that despite all this, I can’t stop loving you. Buck you, Twilight Sparkle.” A sniffle. “Buck you, You stupid mare that I love. Bu-buck…..y-you…” Rainbow felt her rage dissipate like the storm over her head as she began to sob. “Why? Why did it have to be like this? Why did you have to be straight? Why couldn’t I like stallions like a normal mare? Why….Why am I in the friend zone? Why….why can’t I give up on you?” Rainbow once promised herself that she would never cry. She wept. She sobbed. She let the cold in her chest out in the form of tears. Her despair lightened with each tear, her mind clearing with each sob. “I guess this is it, then. My Twilight….my Twilight is dead. And this Rainbow Dash….She can die with her. The New Rainbow Dash will be twenty percent cooler. I don’t need her. I….don’t need friends. I don’t need the Element of Loyalty. They don’t need me.” With that, Rainbow made up her mind, once again, took to the sky. “Ahm’ sorry about Rainbow Dash, Twi, Nightshade. She’s been acting strange for weeks now. I’m sure she didn’t mean it.” Applejack said uncertainly and Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie hugged the shocked Twilight. “What if she’s right, though? She’s tried to talk to me several times before now, and each time, I’ve brushed her aside. I’ve even yelled at her a few times. What am I becoming, everypony?” Rainbow’s last words echoed in her mind, hammering away at her like…..something that hammers repeatedly. Twilight let out a humorless laugh. “At a loss for words in my own head….I’ve really changed a lot, haven’t I?” “Don’t worry about her Twi. She’s just being jealous. I’m sure she’ll come around. If she doesn’t, then she’s not a very good friend, and she doesn’t deserve you.” “No, she’s right.” Spike’s voice cut like a knife. “You’ve changed a lot, Twilight. You’ve always been obsessive, but you’ve gotten worse. I don’t like it. I LIVE with you, remember? I didn’t notice it at first, but Rainbow’s been changing with you, and like you, it hasn’t been for the better.” “Yeah!” “Scootaloo?” Multiple voices sounded as three smaller ponies seemed to appear out of nowhere. “Sweetie Bell, Apple Bloom, shouldn’t you ponies be in bed?” “Not until you hear us out, sis.” Sweetie Bell demanded defiantly. Spike smiled gratefully at the trio. “The Cutie Mark Crusaders have the floor. I call Sweetie Bell to the stand.” “When was the last time you ponies hung out?” She asked pointedly. Several blinks rewarded her. “I mean really hung out, all together, for fun. Last time was five weeks ago. Sis, you were ecstatic because Twilight had been spending so much time with Night Shade that she didn’t have time for her friends. Is that how a true friend acts, Twilight?” “She had a coltfriend. It’s natural for her to spend less time with her friends and more with me.” Night Shade argued. “Which brings me to the second article of discussion. I call Apple Bloom to the stand.” “Thanks, Sweetie Bell. Anyway, how many times has Rainbow Dash tried to talk to all of you? She tried, Applejack. She’s tried talkin’ to you, Rarity, and even Fluttershy once. How many times have you actually listened? She finally talked tah SPIKE, and he was the only one who listened! Tell me, how’s that being a good friend? Each time, you turned her away! She’s always come tah you for advice, Applejack, and the last time, you told her tah got out, and stop bein’ petty and jealous. She was wanting somepony tah listen and try tah help her. Ya’ll just ignored her.” Applejack suddenly felt shame color her face as she pondered her sister’s words. “I-I…I have no excuse. Ahm’s sorry, Applebloom.” “Ah ain’t the one you should apologize to. And finally, Scootaloo.” Scootaloo, took a step forward, her face grim as she glared the five ponies who her Idol called her friends. Her Question was pointed and held nothing but disappointment and disdain for those who had hurt her big sister. “How many times have you seen Rainbow Dash cry? I’ve seen her cry. I’ve seen her cry and rage and scream and sob. I’ve seen her hurt. I know your all think you know Rainbow Dash, but I know the truth. You hurt her bad, and you’ve failed as the Elements. Especially you, Twilight Sparkle. Right now, Rainbow Dash is out in a field, crying her eyes out because you all hurt her. Yet here you all are, mad at her, and comforting Twilight Sparkle, who is probably the biggest failure here right now.” Night Shade turned red with rage. “Listen here, you little Brat. You are a foal. What would you know about this?” Scootaloo stood her ground, glaring back at the black stallion. “I know only what these five and Rainbow Dash taught me. You’ve all failed as Rainbow Dash’s friends. I’m out. You don’t deserve to be Rainbow Dash’s friends.” “Cutie Mark Crusaders, it’s time to go. I’m gonna go look for my big sister.” With a rev of her scooter, the Cutie Mark Crusaders departed. “That insolent brat…!” Night Shade began. “Watch it, partner. I made a mistake, and I intend to fix it. Scootaloo was right. We’ve failed as friends.” Applejack glared at Night Shade, who glared right back. Something clicked in Twilight’s mind as she watched her coltfriend and her other friend stare each other down. “I’m tearing us apart.” The revelation shocked her to her core. As if in reply to her realization, there was a telltale whoosh of displaced air as Rainbow Dash appeared within sight. Something clinked their feet. Something gold. “Is that….” Rarity started, her eyes wide. “I’m done. Find a new Element of Loyalty, Twilight Sparkle. I’m out, I’ve had enough, I can’t take this anymore. Maybe Night Shade can be the new Element of Loyalty. Hah, that’d be funny, Twilight, won’t it? Leave him alone with a bunch of attractive mares and see how long his loyalty lasts. Better yet, if Luna ever goes rogue again, you better hope that your books can tell you how to break in a new Element of Harmony. I can’t take this anymore.” “Wait, Rainbow! Listen…ahm sorry. I should have listened to you instead of just turning you away. Ah’ve been stupid, and it took mah little sister yellin’ at me to make me see just how stupid. Can you forgive me for bein’ a bad friend?” Applejack stepped forward, her face red with shame as she looked the hovering Pegasus in the eyes, hoping she could see the remorse in her eyes. Rainbow’s visage remained unmoved. “I’ve been wrong as well, Rainbow. And you as well, Spike. For me, both of you tried to warn this was coming, but I turned you away as well. I was so blinded by the new romance in the group that I ignored what it was doing to us as friends.” “I’m not convinced. It takes me deciding to leave to make you see the error of your ways. Great. I feel like I have such AWESOME bucking friends. They don’t listen, they ignore me, and only when I try to leave do they even think to apologize.” “Rainbow Dash…” Twilight started. “Ah, she SPEAKS! Stop right there, Twilight.” Rainbow felt horrible for what she was saying, but she needed the break to be clean. She couldn’t let them drag her back. She just….couldn’t. It hurt so much…. “Go ahead and leave then, Rainbow Dash. You never liked me, and look at what you’re doing to your friends. Who’s being a bad friend now?” Nightshade sneered. Rainbow felt her temper flare. “Hey, Twilight, I’m about to show you a new trick, since I learned it because of you. Too bad you’ll never get to study it, because I doubt any Pegasus alive today knows how to do it. I’m not even sure how or why it works.” Night Shade snorted, glaring at the biggest pain in his side since he started dating Celestia’s student. “Do your worst, Featherbrain.” “Just remember. You asked.” Rainbow closed her eyes, calling up the calm rage she had felt, before pointing at the ground in front of the pony she loathed with every fiber of her being. “Lightning.” Crack-BOOOM! Out of nowhere, a lightning bolt sliced down, splitting the air and scorching the ground, singeing the dumbstruck stallion. “Y-you used magic.” The black unicorn stammered. “I did. Any more insults you want to throw at me, mule? I could do that all day.” Rainbow snarled. “That’s enough, Rainbow. You don’t need to hurt anyone.” Twilight said hurriedly. That lightning looked lethal. “Of course you’d protect him. Right on Cue. So, last one. Twilight. BUCKING. Sparkle. The most magical unicorn in Equestria. I’ll agree with him on that. You are better than the Princesses, because you’re NOT one. You never needed to be. But that’s where my agreement with him ends. So. Twilight Sparkle. I have some things I want to say, and dammit, you’re going to listen. Twilight Sparkle. I hate you. I hate you more than you could ever realize. Words cannot tell you how much I have grown to hate you over the past seven weeks. Yes, I counted. I hate the way you obsess over things. I hate that you’d rather be with that THING than your friends. I hate that you are clueless about what you’ve been doing to us. And last but not least. I hate what you’ve done to me. What I’ve turned into. Goodbye, Twilight Sparkle.” With that, Rainbow turned her back, hoping that no one would see her tears as she prepared to leave Ponyville for the final time. “Why?” Rainbow froze at Twilight’s voice. Her broken voice. Her voice which was so filled with despair and desperation that it cut through her soul like a frozen knife. “That can’t be it, Rainbow. We’ve had disagreements in the past, but you’ve never reacted like this. We’re the Elements of Harmony, and even Discord couldn’t tear us apart. You’re the Element of Loyalty, Rainbow. Without you, we can’t go on. I wasn’t listening before, Rainbow, but I’m listening now. Why? Tell me how to fix this, Rainbow Dash!” “It’s too late, Twi. And It was never me the Elements relied on as the glue. It was you.” Rainbow hung her head. “It was always you. We always relied on you. You had you faults, but in the end, you were always there.” Rainbow felt her icy façade crack as words began to tumble out, accompanied by tears. “You’ve been there for everyone, Twi. Where were you, Twilight? When I needed you to listen. When I needed you to listen, you abandoned me. I needed you, Twi. I NEEDED you.” A sob tore through her throat, leaving the rest of the Mane Six in shock. “I always needed you, Twilight Sparkle. It was such a little thing….it always was!” Twilight could hear the tears in Rainbows voice, as she hesitantly took a step forward. “You want to know what’s worse, you stupid mare?” Rainbow turned, her mask completely broken and tears streaming down her face. “I STILL need you! All this time…All this bucking time, I kept hoping you’d wake up. Maybe it’s my fault, but I didn’t ask for this, Twi! I NEVER asked to have my heart broken! I hate this, I hate being this way. Just one STUPID mare who happened to get too attached to the most amazing mare in Equestria." "I hate being that stupid! I hate that I’m STILL that Stupid! I hate that you like that BASTARD more than me! I HATE it, Twilight Sparkle!” Twilight was frozen in place. She was socially awkward, and would admit that she didn’t know a lot about social interactions, but from what she’d read about in books, something was about to be said that she’d never expected from the cyan pony. “Rainbow…what are you….are you saying…” Her mind was running a hundred miles a minute, trying to formulate a response. It wasn’t coming. Only Rainbow Dash…only Rainbow Dash can make me lose it like this. “There’s two things I hate more than anything right now, Twi.” Rainbow brushed the tears out of her eyes, walking toward the frozen unicorn. She steeled herself, preparing to make the plunge she’s never could before, leaning to whisper in Twilight’s ear. “I hate that I can’t hate you, and I hate being stuck in the Friend Zone.” With that, she stole Twilight’s lips in a bittersweet kiss. For Twilight, it was like somepony flipped a switch in her head. Her heart began to pound and her self-inflicted paralysis was lifted. Her eyes fluttered shut as she melted inside. Night Shade’s kiss had been pleasant, but this….it was…electrifying. It was confusing, it was strange, it was…. Right. She couldn’t understand it. Something inside her told her that this was right, that she should have been doing this a long time ago. It was a mystery that for some reason, she had no problem with never understanding. That didn’t mean she wouldn’t try, however. When their lips parted, Rainbow looked at the shocked looks on everyponies face. Twilight Sparkle, most magical pony in Ponyville, Canterlot, and possibly all of Equestria looked completely and utterly gobsmacked. Lips parted, closed, opened again, and closed again. It would have been adorable if not for how utterly emotionally drained Rainbow was feeling with her outburst. The confession seemed to take the fight right out of her, and her whole body seemed to droop as the others watched, stunned by the outburst. "Oh." The word dropped from Applejack's lips like a lead weight, disturbing the frozen surroundings and snapping everyone out of their shock. Her eyes darted around as if she wanted to gather the word back up and swallow it down. This was...awkward. "You...get AWAY from her!" Rainbow's mask wasn't the only mask to crack, as a magical force seized her and yanked her away, and the resulting reflexive lightning strike made him yelp as he stepped away, instantly releasing the pegasus. He settled for glaring at Rainbow Dash, all but willing her to burst into flames with the amount of disgust and rage in his gaze. "How positively uncouth of you, sir. I understand that emotions are high, but laying magic on a lady is never the way of a gentlecolt. Only a ruffian would do something so rough." Rarity made her viewpoint clear in a way that only she could in present company. Some may call her dramatic, some uselessly obsessed with beauty, some even call her 'Tha type to use fifty words when ten would do just fine!' (Applejack), but no one could say she couldn't read a room. Rarity chose her side, and she chose the side who had never let her down when it mattered, the side that she knew and had a begrudging respect for. The side that didn't repeatedly schedule outings with her unicorn friend on days meant for spa days booked weeks in advance. That had been a major red flag for her, but she'd been willing to let bygones be bygones when Twilight assured her "it couldn't have been on purpose, Night Shade LOVED her friends!" Rarity was the element of Generosity, and while she did tend to get a bit...intense with her love of fancy dresses, it always came from a place of love. She loved beauty, loved gemstones for that very reason. She wanted to share that love with everyone! She wanted everyone to have that beauty, that shine of glamour and glitter. The silken finery draped on fine ponies, the smiles of ponies who never knew they could be just as beautiful as herself. But there was nothing generous about Night Shade. He was greedy. Perhaps not for money, but for attention. He was generous with meaningless words, especially when Twilight was concerned, but there had always been something...off about him to Rarity, a hollow ring with no gem, a stitch misplaced that threw off the entire dress. She never expected him to be perfect, not even she would claim to be perfect! But she'd caught him looking at her flank more than once, caught the sneer sometimes when a particularly....enthusiastic pony from the small town of Ponyville got too close. But the moments tended to be fleeting enough that she thought perhaps she imagined it. No. Rarity was not particularly fond of Night Shade, but as the bearer of Generosity, she would be generous and give him...the benefit of the doubt. While Rarity cut in with words, Applejack was of a more...physical lean. She stepped in to block Rainbow from his sight as she shot him a glare. "Now Ah ain't the smartest a ponies, an' I don't claim tah be perfect, but ah ain't gonna say that ah plan tah make the same mistake twice in a row. Touch mah friend again, an' you'll find yourself meetin' tha wrong end of mah hooves." "Rainbow Dash." And like that, the stillness was back as Twilight managed to speak. Rainbow's gaze snapped back to the speaker, reaching up to wipe the tears from her eyes. Rainbow Dash doesn't cry, after all. Twilight's gaze was still confused, hopelessly searching for an answer that eluded even her magical pony brain. The cyan pony forced herself to swallow, fight or flight instincts already screaming at her. "Yeah?" She inwardly winced at the aggression in her own voice. Part of her wanted to lash out, to scream at Twilight again and just...take off. But the fragile hope in her still remained, regardless of the utterly lost look in Twilight's eyes. She forced herself to calm down, calling on years of acting experience to keep her level. Twilight swallowed, seemingly also forcing herself to speak. "Rainbow...why did you kiss me?" The words, once spoken, could not be taken back. But Twilight was not one to shy away from an question this important, no matter how much the possible answer scared her. She gulped again. This was harder than she expected. She wanted this answer, NEEDED this answer. "Rainbow Dash. I need to to tell me, in no uncertain terms, EXACTLY why you kissed me, and please...be blunt." Rainbow Dash could feel her cheeks redden. Right now? In front of EVERYPONY? Rage began to build as she gritted her teeth. Was she trying to humiliate her now? No. She breathed deeply, breaking the light of sight between her and the purple mare. Breathe, Dash, Breathe. Twilight wasn't like that, no matter how much Night Shade may twist her. Twilight was a good pony. It looks like Rainbow Dash would have to do something she avoided whenever possible...talk about how she was feeling. "Hey...Twilight...you know how we used to have reading dates? Reading the whole Daring Do series, the Celestial Battle series, and stuff? I...miss those days. But...remember that one day, when we were laughing at a joke I made about Anakin Skytrotter talking to the princess, and how he was silent when she asked him to confirm something she thought was obvious? How I went quiet and nearly fell off the couch, and then said I forgot to feed Tank, but it was the middle of winter and he was asleep? And how I flew out?" Rainbow Dash could feel the burn in her cheeks, and tried to drum up some anger to buffer the embarrassment of what she was about to admit. She found herself rubbing the ground with her hoof as she attempted to admit the thought that had plagued her for months afterward. She opened her mouth and- BOOM! A ear deafening cannon shot sounded, and the Main Six (And Spike...and minus Pinkie Pie) looked around wildly to find out what happened. Oddly enough, Night Shape appeared to have been...pasted...to a tree with something white and sticky. He opened his mouth as anger welled up, his horn lighting up as he attempted to free himself. "I-" And then suddenly, there was duct tape on his mouth as Pinkie Pie silenced him, looking about as angry as any of them had ever seen her. "NO! SHUSH! I've had to put up with Twilight blowing me off for WEEKS! She told me not to throw a "I'm making a big Mistake!" party for her when you started dating, and she won't let me prank you because you find that stupid and a waste of time! I've had it up to HERE with you, buster!" Pinkie Pie was the element of Laughter, and rarely did she get upset, but as she illustrated how high up she'd had it (it was pretty damn high, actually, standing on two legs was weirdly easy for the party pony!), she was about as mad as she would be if she was banned from throwing parties....foreeeeeever. "I've seen the signs for MONTHS! I've had to endure waiting for the party for Dashie's 'I'm going to be honest with myself and everyone else' since this whole mess started, I've had three heartbeat skips, two tail twinges, seven eye-twitchs and hoof tingle and you will NOT. RUIN THIS FOR ME!" She stared right into Night Shade's eyes with the look of a mare on the edge. "I know laughter, and you are the most unfunny pony I've met! You hate laughing, you think parties are only for meeting mares and getting more attention, and the most fun you've had at a party was when somepony spiked the punch with some sort of drug to put the ponies in heat!" "Hey, wait, did you say-" "NOT IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW! Point is that you don't make Twilight laugh! You make her smile, but only if she does something to make you happy! So, you are going to sit here, stuck to this tree QUIETLY, or so help me, I will turn you into a blueberry pony! Have you ever tried walking as a blueberry pony? Neither have I! SO ZIP IT!" "Um...excuse me..." The shyest, yellowest of their group spoke hesitantly, offering what appeared to be a soft cloth the pink party mare who grabbed it without a single question, pressing it against the dark unicorns face. He struggled for a few seconds, squirming and trying to get free, before his eyes rolled back and he slumped, unconscious. Twilight spoke hesitantly, looking rather stunned. "Was that..." Fluttershy smiled sheepishly. "Sorry. I have that around for when I need to make critters sleep for their own good. Sometimes the pain is too much...so I offer them that so they can sleep while I bandage them." Rainbow Dash and Twilight both looked at the pegasus with a look of shock, and a slight bit of fright. "It's not important right now. Rainbow Dash, the Library, Anakin Skytrotter, falling out of the seat?" Fluttershy's voice was firm, insistent, and utterly intrigued. Fluttershy was a timid pony, she wasn't ashamed to admit she preferred a soft nudge or a gentle coaxing to sharp demands and outspoken words. But if there was something that managed to make her feel excited enough to scream...it was romance. She'd known Rainbow Dash for a long time, and knew her quite well. Sadly, the two...didn't have that much in common, and while the speedster was her friend, she knew that Rainbow Dash had always seen her as...well, something to protect. Like a delicate action figure. She didn't mind it, really, but she really did wish that Rainbow would talk to her about these feeling of hers before now. She knew better than most that Rainbow Dash had her fair share of emotional troubles, but Dash had always been one to hide her weakness. Rainbow Dash, to her credit, looked back at the bearer of Magic, steeling herself for her brief moment of openness. "You looked at me, that day, and your smile was big enough I could have probably counted your teeth. Your eyes were gleaming, and you were doing that silly laugh you do when you care barely breathe because you're laughing so hard. You have a silly thing you do where you'll time your laugh, then take a breath, then continue laughing. I know you don't even realize you're doing it, and it...just popped into my head." The rainbow maned mare inhaled deeply, then exhaled. "I thought...'I love this mare so much.' And you were looking at me with those eyes, and I felt your body pressed against mine, and...I just...had to get out. Because if I didn't, I was going to kiss you, and I wasn't going to make that mistake AGAIN. I've crushed on straight mares before, Twilight, and it never ends well for me." Twilight blinked, and for a moment, it looked like she might fall over as she fought the urge to hyperventilate. "Dash...I...Um. I...just...one moment." Her rear hit the ground, and she covered her eyes with her hooves before magic flared in her horn, and she vanished. "Umm...should we-" Started Rarity, before Spike cut her off, a testament to just how utterly DONE he was with today. "Wait for it." As if on cue, Twilight's muffled scream of frustration tore through the air from the direction of the library. The scream was actually rather impressive, as long as it lasted, before there was another flash, and she reappeared. "Okay. So, Dash. You and I need to talk. Girls, I think you should come too, because I am a mess and freaking out JUST A BIT right now, and I need you to tackle Rainbow if she tries to run because I NEED to get this straightened out because if I don't I'm going to go crazy and probably put a tracking spell on her and it'll creep her out and-" "Twilight! Breathe." Spike came in for the rescue, poking his mom/older sister figure as he urged her to take a breath. "Now, just stay calm and-" FLASH! "-everything will be all...oh, we're here." He concluded lamely as the Mane Six were teleported into the library. "Now, I think that right now, you two need to talk." He stated, indicating to Rainbow and Twilight. "Okay, so, full disclosure in the spirit of Honesty." Twilight started, Applejack perking up at the mention of her element. "So, I don't know much about love. Objectively, I know mare can like mares, stallions can like stallions, and all that. But...I've never actually dated a mare. I mean, there was one time I thought maybe one mare may have kinda sorta liked me, but we barely talked, and she could have just been shy. Anyway, I might have kinda gotten the idea that you MIGHT have liked me that way, in that special somepony way, but you never said anything Rainbow, so I thought I was mistaken-" "Wait, you KNEW I liked you?!" Rainbow Dash bristled, eyes narrowing at the purple pony before a purple hoof cut her off, pressing against her mouth as Twilight shushed her. "-Shush, Dash, not finished yet! Okay, so when I was younger, I might have...sorta...though a colt liked me. And when I confronted him about it, he told me he was only being nice, and was dating someone else in my class. My entire class was still snickering about it months later, and he went out of his way to avoid me after that. He was one of my few friends, and I ruined it by thinking there was something there that wasn't. I didn't have many friends because I was in the advanced classes and after that, I kept getting teased by colts because of that. So I promised myself that no matter what signs I might see...If the pony didn't come out and say it straight to me, I would pretend the signs meant nothing. You never said you liked me like that, Dash, and I didn't want to mess things up by daring to hope you might actually like me." Twilight's face was stained pink as she refused to meet Rainbow Dash's eyes. She inhaled, then barreled on before anyone could say anything. "I know, doing it that way wasn't...the best idea, but I didn't want to be made fun of again, and it caused so much trouble and embarrassment when I was a foal that I just...wanted to do anything to avoid that again. Night Shade was...well, he was the first one to ever admit he liked me, so I thought...I though this may be the only chance for me to learn what love was like." Shame covered the face of the bearer of magic, and she looked down at the floor with reddening eyes. "I knew that he wasn't perfect...I knew that Rarity didn't like him, and I knew that you utterly hated him, Rainbow...but I thought...I thought that once you got past the initial dislike, he could be our friend as well. Then he started...I don't know, giving me little nudges here and there. Little comparisons on places I could be better. Things I did that were unnecessary. He'd make plans that clashed with mine, then mention that his time was limited, and those times were the only free time he had. It started small...but now that you girls mentioned it, I have been acting distant. I feel...like I can't do anything right anymore. Like I'm not good enough anymore, so I try to study more so I'll be better, which means I have less time, and I don't spend as much time with you, which makes me feel worse, and I..." A teardrop fell, then another, and another, until there was a torrent of them as Twilight Sparkle, Element of Magic, Librarian of Ponyville, and complete and utter mess of a pony broke down. Fluttershy, predictably, was the first to rush to embrace her as she dissolved into sobs of shame. "There there, Twilight...we know you didn't mean it. You are absolutely good enough, and don't let that failure of a pony tell you different. You've made mistakes, but so does everypony." The Bearer of Kindness looked around the room, and one by one, the other girls came in for a hug. "Don't cry, darling...I know what it's like to get so sucked into the idea of perfection that everything else fades. We forgive you. That ruffian is at fault here, not you." Rarity gave twilight a sympathetic hug, before looking at Dash with a gaze that might have been trying to communicate something, but Rainbow Dash wasn't getting it. Pinkie was next, strangely subdued as she nuzzled into the purple pony. "Yeah, old meanie pants knew he had to keep Dashie away from you. She was the only one that could free you from his evil plot. Like a kiss from your true love that can break brainwashing!" Applejack all but swept the rest into a strong hug as she met eyes with Rainbow Dash. "Ah been a bad friend ta two pony, ah think. First tellin' Rainbow to skedaddle when she needed a shoulder, and not steppin' in when ah noticed ya gettin' distant, Twi. You get in here, too, Rainbow; ain't nothin' so bad a big hug can't help." Rainbow Dash, however, sat there dumbfounded as the dots connected. She'd thought Twilight just hadn't noticed, or that she wasn't interested. "Hey...Twilight. I...I think I owe you an apology." She started, only to be surrounded by a familiar glow, and pulled into the hug. Twilight gazed at the light blue pony, eyes all but demanding she stop talking. "No Rainbow...I think I owe YOU an apology. I should have talked to you, tried to hear you out about why you didn't like Night Shade. Maybe if I had, you wouldn't have felt so hurt." Rainbow shook her head. "No, Twilight...I don't think...I would have told you. I can understand why you refused to think that I wanted to be your special somepony." Dash joined the hug, nuzzling against Twilight's neck lightly, before the cuddle pile disbanded. "Hey, before ya'll start gettin' into the important bits, ah reckon we should give you some privacy." Applejack smiled at the two ponies, sharing their feelings as Fluttershy nodded. "Drop by later and tell me how it goes, Rainbow. Don't feel like you can't talk to me about things like this." Fluttershy stated her case in an unusually assertive tone, though the inside of her mind was as pink with romance as her mane. "Indeed, matters of the heart aren't to be aired before the common rabble. I will take my leave, as a lady should. Rainbow Dash, Twilight, I expect to see you at the Boutique in no more than a week for fittings. And Rainbow Dash, do not try to weasel your way out of it." Rarity added her own bit of flare with a knowing smirk at the two. "Ohmygosh, I have a party to prepare for! With balloons! And candy! And cupcakes! I'll see you both later!" The party pony, possible non-Euclidean entity known as Pinkie Pie bounded away behind a nearby owl stand...and somehow vanished behind it. Twilight blinked as the girls made their exits, though mostly at Pinkie Pie. "I know she's not using unicorn magic to doe that, but still...HOW." Rainbow Dash only giggled. "Pinkie is Pinkie, don't question it. Like that one pony wrote, there are somethings ponies were not meant to know, and understanding how Pinkie does it is probably enough to make you go crazy." The two laughed at that, a familiar, easy silence settling between the two of them. Rainbow Dash broke it with a soft sigh, deciding that with all the revelations happening today, she might as well add the last one. "Listen, Twi...I don't deal with emotions well. I grew up wanting to be a stunt pony. I loved to fly, but I was often clumsy and ran into things; it's why my parents try so hard to encourage me. I went through some dark times, Twilight, and I learned early on that showing emotion is like showing weakness. I...well. I'm not like that Vegeta pony. I don't believe my own hype that much. I brag a lot, but-" She was cut off by Twilight's hoof against her lips. "Shh...I know, Dash. But for what it's worth...You never lied about it. You ARE the best. Maybe you didn't used to be, but you are now. At least, you are to me." Rainbow swallowed. Her eyes met Twilight's, and there was that familiar pounding of her heart, the butterflies in her belly. She forcefully tore her gaze away, feeling like a pony unable to breath. "Dash? Are you okay?" Breathe. "You...you can't look at me like that, Twi...I'm...not strong enough to let you go twice. I'm not sure if I'm strong enough to let you go once. You keep...doing that." Rainbow Dash gestured vaguely at Twilight, refusing to meet her eyes. "You just gestured to all of me, Rainbow, I need you to be more clear." "That! You! Just...all of you! The way you look at me with those pretty eyes, and the soft fur, and the smile, and being so bucking UNDERSTANDING and I just CAN'T! You keep being you, and I can't handle it without wanting to KISS YOU and I don't even know if you like mares and then it'll be like you and that colt and-" She felt her face being redirected and lips met hers, cutting her off. Oh. Oooooh. Okay. So this was a thing that was happening. Purple mare, kissing. Yup, those were definitely Twilight lips on hers. Wait, she should be doing something, right? But the person doing the kissing shouldn't be...oh. Yes. Twilight. Twilight was doing the kissing. Dash could FEEL her brain short circuit for several seconds before she joined the kiss, feverishly, desperately, as if it were the last one she would ever get from a purple mare. It lasted several seconds longer before Twilight pulled away. "Huh. Repeat performance shows initial analysis is correct. Emotional stimulus greatly increased when partner is changed. Conclusion: Rainbow Dash is a bit more clumsy with her kisses, but intensity of positive feelings is increased by a factor of approximately 867% compared to previous test subject." The cyan pegasus blinked, staring at the egghead in front of her with incredulity. Twilight noticed her kissing partner's confusion, and had the decency to blush. "Sorry, I mean...I like when you kiss me about 9 times more than when...you know." She fidgeted in that familiar, Twilight way she did, much to Dash's delight. "Egghead. Just say you like kissing me. Um....I know that we've had trouble with this, so...does this mean we're marefriends now, or..." The question was hesitant, but Twilight's smile was bright. "Dash, do you think I'd kiss you otherwise?" "But Night Shade-" "Buck him, I'll leave him a note." Hours later.... Night Shade woke with a start, sprawled on the ground in a puddle of disgusting white goo. He shuddered in disgust, attempting to stand, only to find out that the sticky goo that had pasted him to a tree turned slick and slimy with time. After much slipping and sliding, he was able to stand, only to find a note stuck to the tree HE'D been stuck to hours ago. He gave it a quick read, rage building before he opened his mouth to scream his now ex's name. He never got the chance. BOOM! Something soft hit him with unimaginable force, and he found himself flying up...up....UP...and AWAY! "Bang! Pow, straight to the mooooooon~!" Said the excitable pink pony happily, before melting into the shadows... Night Shade I regret to inform you that as of this moment, you have been, as the slang goes, dumped. Our relationship is now over, as I have re evaluated my life and those I wish to keep in it, and I regret to inform you that you did not make the cut. I wish I could say it wasn't you, but as my best friend is the bearer of Honesty, I don't want to get a disapproving stare from her should I happen to lie. it was ABSOLUTELY you. While I will confess that my most loyal friend, Rainbow Dash most certainly influenced my choice in ten seconds flat, the fact remains that you generously shared your opinion on my shortcomings enough that I desire to work to improve them. Sadly for you, I have decided that I would do this better without you. In short, you are dumped. We're going in different directions with our lives, your importance to me has been downsized, your unwanted criticisms are no longer wanted nor required, and my friends don't like you or what you've tried to turn me into. In other words, buck off. Off: The general direction of which I wish you to buck. Buck: Slang verb, often used in replacement for the word fuck. You are done. Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle, Bearer of the Element of Magic, Celestia's Prized Student, The Mare with the Awesome Marefriend, and your Ex.