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// Everyone Hates Bathtime 
// Story: High Maintenance Alicorn Fillies and You. 
// by FaelaArts 
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Celestia entered her room, her eye twitching as a suspicious yellow substance dropped through her coat. On her back a little filly played with food she had conveniently hovered next to her. Celestia hadn’t thought to actually move the food away yet, even as it was smeared into her pure white coat. The filly was of course Twilight Sparkle, and she was giggling energetically as she went about annoying the princess. Celestia chose to ignore it.

“One hoof in front of the other” she muttered, ignoring the shocked glances from the guards, and the laughing that was always behind her back as she passed by them.  As she finally entered her chambers the quiet tapping of her hooves was only interrupted by the sloshing sounds as Twilight smeared her coat with food, and the dripping of the suspicious substance.

“Let’s get you, and me, cleaned up before I am forced to go out in public again.” Celestia turned her gaze to Twilight, who blinked and made a very bright smile. Celestia may have even forgiven the little Alicorn, if the action had not been accompanied with the remains of the bowl being thrown at her head. Face covered by the bowl, her ear flicked a few times, before she gently levitated the bowl onto a counter, ignoring the mess starting to cover her room.

“Twilight, if you are aware of what you are doing right now, I may have to actually make good on the things you expected me to do last time you overreacted at being ‘tardy.’” Her stare bored into the filly, who simply tilted her head and gurgled happily as she scrubbed the gunk deeper into Celestia’s fur. Celestia lowered her head, trying to contain barely suppressed anger

“Let’s get you in the bath, before I am tempted to turn into a Nightmare just to escape this torment.” Celestia gently walked into the bathroom, and ran a bath. She watched the water carefully, ensuring it wasn’t her normal temperature but a pleasant luke warm. Finishing up, she turned the taps of and reached for a filly shape on her back, only to find it absent.

“Twilight” she shrieked, rushing out of the bath and managing to close the window just before a purple blur raced out the window to terrorize the city. Celestia heaved a sigh of relief, glad she had managed to avoid a disaster, her head lowered and her eyes closed as she tried coping with this unexpected burden.

“Oh” was all she said as she realised a sniffling sound was surrounding the room. Turning to look at Twilight, she only had time to widen her eyes as a keening cry swept through Equestria. The guards having heard it earlier pretended not to notice and tried not to grimace and guffaw at the same time. Canterlot simply glanced to the castle, and wondered what Luna was celebrating this time. The five element bearers reached for their elements, putting them on just in case.

“I’m sorry Twilight, but you can’t go out into the city.” Celestia desperately tried to calm her student filly, but was having no luck. In desperation she levitated the filly up and gently rocked her, thinking that parents must do this for a reason. She was no doubt shocked and relieved when it actually worked and Twilight began to cease wailing and instead settled down and smiled at her, trying to catch Celestia's magic.

“Now that we’ve set the ground rules, it’s time for a bath.” Celestia could feel the dread laden in her voice as she walked toward her bath and gently stepped into the water, a filly hovering nearby. The filly was interested in the water, so once Celestia was settled she brought the filly down to wash her before doing herself. As Twilight’s foot touched the water, problems began. Twilight began doing everything in her power to avoid the water, Celestia’s eye twitched again.

“I, Said, BATH TIME” Celestia only realised later on she had started using the royal Canterlot voice midway through speaking, too busy trying to deal with the Alicorn filly. It was then, that problems only got worse. Twilight’s horn sparked with innate magic and suddenly Twilight was in a desperate tug o war not over something huge like a moon but over who was or was not getting wet. 

“Sorry Twilight, but I’m not losing to a filly today of all days.” Celestia slowly drew on more and more of her own magic, and Twilight slowly inched toward the water, and finally the line was crossed and Twilight was in, after a few moments struggling, she realised this wasn’t too bad and began to enjoy the water. Celestia watched her play, gritting her teeth and beginning the long process of cleaning up the little Alicorn. After cleaning her up, Celestia left her to play and began scrubbing the stains and gunk and smell out of her coat, satisfied when it gleamed with its normal sheen. Getting out of the bath, she dried off Twilight and then herself and entered her room.

“Alright, you’re fed, gone to the toilet, cleaned, what else does a baby need?” Celestia walked to the centre of her room, bringing the filly from hovering beside her to her front and she blinked to see Twilight was fluttering her eyes. After a moment, she yawned and settled the magic Celestia had surrounding her into the shape of a pillow and a blanket before slowly falling asleep. Celestia blinked, a slight blush coming over her face. Twilight was beautiful as a filly; however Celestia could only appreciate it when she was asleep.

“Come on my little filly, let’s gets some rest.” Celestia gently tucked the filly into the second side of her bed, and walked over to the door and told the guards she was not to be disturbed except for international emergencies. After that was done, the princess stifled a yawn and gently curled into the blankets next to the sleeping filly. Gazing at the sleeping form of Twilight, a small smile fell on her face as she felt a motherly bond overcome her, and gently cradled the filly beside her before drifting off to sleep herself. Celestia slept well for an hour, before something she had no idea she actually did happened. Her mouth open, she began to snore very loudly right in the sleeping Filly’s ear. Celestia awoke seconds later to the screams of Twilight crying, and she groaned and gently rocked the filly back to sleep.

“I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night.”