//------------------------------// // Captain Sergeant // Story: The life of an odd Prince // by Lucen Aurora //------------------------------// Captain Sergeant By Lucen Aurora “Captain Skyline, why are we searching for the prince out here in the gardens? Didn't Major Ironsides say he already swept the area a few minutes ago,” asked a young looking unicorn guard. Captain Skyline stopped under a tree and turned sharply around to scowl at the younger guard. “Because, Private, the Prince is most likely to be here in the gardens. That, and Major Ironsides is an idiot,” the older pegasi guard replied. The younger guard ogled his superior in surprise. “Sir, should you really be talking about a superior officer like that?” he asked nervously. Captain Skyline flared his wings and snorted, “ Just keep your eyes open and your mouth shut, rookie. If I know the prince, he should be somewhere in here.” The Private looked uncertainly over at his superior but did as he was told and kept quiet. The Captain stalked around a tree, wings up, casting his head back and forth, but stopped when his wings brushed up against something. Looking straight up, the Captain cried out in triumph. The private rushed over and looked up to see the Prince of Equestria sound asleep, hanging limply from a large branch not unlike a piece of wet laundry slung across the back of a couch; if a tree was a couch and a pony was laundry. The Private looked on in horror as the Captain reared up, grabbed one of the Princes hooves in his own, and pulled, violently. The Captain twisted mid-throw to land on his hooves, and the prince landed in a heap, flailing and grunting at his rude awakening. “Captain! You, you just assaulted the Prince!,” the private cried in horror. Prince Lucen got groggily to his hooves and looked around, flexing his wings a few times and levitating a brown brimmed hat from where it had fallen a few yards away. “Wake-up sunshine, your mother is looking for you,” the Captain barked. “Huh? Oh, it's you Sergeant,” the Prince replied in the middle of a yawn. “I'm a CAPTAIN now, Lucen. I was promoted last year.” the Captain replied stiffly. “Oh, I know, I was just addressing you by name, you know.” the Prince replied with a smile. “What? But the Captains name is,” the Private began. “Not important now,” said the captain, who turned to give the Private a severe look as he cut him off. When he turned back to look at the Prince, Lucen had gotten right up in his face and was grinning, a grin held up by his hooves, his wings fluttering to keep him from falling on his face. “You haven't told him, Sergeant,” the Prince cooed. “That's not important now, your mother is looking for you,” the Captain replied, a gleam of fear in his eyes. “He hasn't told you,” the Prince went on teleporting beside the Private and putting a hoof on his shoulder. “Hasn't told me what, your highness,” the Private asked nervously. “Nothing! And he will be going to see his mother now,” the Captain cried and tried to push the Prince along, but the Prince grinned and teleported to the opposite side of the Private. “Only the BEST drunk story EVER,” the Prince replied. The Captain groaned and facehoofed. “You see, it all started long long ago in a galaxy far far away, when Sergeant was just born.” the Prince began. “I think you are confusing,” the Private began but was silence by one of the Princes hooves stuffed into his mouth. The private was so surprised by this he reared up and ended up on his back. “Anyway,” the Prince went on, “I knew Sergeant's father, Private Pointy, we were friends. We still are friends, even though his mother Pinkie Bell to this day refuses talk to me.” “There's a reason for that, “ the Captain growled. “I'm getting to that,” the Prince replied solemnly he sat down beside the Private who had rolled over and was now sitting in the grass. “As I was saying, I know Sergeants father. He had been in the guard for nearly nine years at the time, and had never gotten a promotion. Nice pony, not very good at being a guard. Well, after Sergeant was born, we went out to celebrate together, and we got really, really, really drunk. So drunk that when we woke up the next evening, with Pinkie Bell standing over us; after having just given birth the other day mind you, we knew it was trouble.” the Prince said. “That, is an understatement,” the Captain said with a snort. “We couldn't remember ANYTHING from the night before, but from what we figured out later, Pointy had decided to make sure his son would rise above him in rank, and so he would name is son Sergeant to make sure he would at least become a sergeant in the guard.” the Prince concluded. “Uh, wow, that's. If I may speak freely your majesty,” the Private asked. “You can speak any way you like, it makes no difference to me,” the Prince replied with a shrug. “It doesn't work that way, your highness,” the Private said. “Gee, you think?” the Captain replied. “Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time.” the Prince replied sheepishly. “It seemed like a good idea at the time? IT SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA AT THE TIME!?” the Captain shouted. The prince shrank back as the Captain advanced on him, grinning apologetically. The Captain stopped just short of the Prince and began to stomp his hooves on the grass, fluttering his wings violently. “My mother has not forgiven you for writing that decree to this day!” he shouted. “Yes, I know,” the Prince mumbled, “The teeth. Oh gawd, the horrible, horrible teeth.” “Um, Captain, maybe you shouldn't be shouting at the Prince,” the Private asked in a timid voice. “ARGH!” the Captain screamed, turning away and stalking over to the tree and slumping down under, looking completely defeated. The Prince quietly walked over and sat down next to the Captain who was still huffing and puffing. “I really am sorry for that, you know,” the Prince said, his voice sullen. “You didn't have to tell that story,” the Captain replied wearily. “I got carried away again, Skyline.” he said. “Damn straight you did,” the Captain replied. “How is your dad doing? Is he enjoying his retirement?” the Prince asked. “He's doing alright. He and mother moved out to Las Pegasus last month. They plan to retire there.” “After what happened in Las Pegasus” the Prince asked in an incredulous tone. The Captain rolled his eyes and sighed. “The way mother tells if, if you two get to get drunk off your plots out there and name her first born, she gets to have her fun too.” “I would never begrudge Pinkie Bell her fun, you know,” the Prince said. “You really ought to go and see what you mother wants,” the Captain replied, rubbing his temples with his hooves. The Prince nodded, smiled and stood up. He took a few steps to get out from beneath the tree then quickly crouched and launched himself into the air, making a straight beeline for the castles High Tower. “Wow,” the Private said quietly as he walked up to the Captain while watching the Prince recede into the distance. “Wow, indeed, Private,” the Captain said, trailing of into a sigh, “Wow indeed.”