She’s shaking as she says this. “Guards!” She shouts to the door. The four guards come in, heads down. “I thought I told you to keep everyone, absolutely everyone out. That includes my sister as well” She looks down at the four of them.
One of them loses his nerves, and tries bolting for the door. Celestia uses her magic, picks up the running pony, and shuts the door. She levitates him towards her, looking him in the eye. “Not very stallion-like of you, running at the slightest hint of injury. How did you ever get to be on my individual team of protectants?” She asks him.
The commander speaks up. “You told me once that you can adequately protect yourself, and that the reason we were hired was because you find us amusing...” He cuts off after he catches the glare from us. “Please don’t hurt” He cowers in the corner. Celestia picks him up also, and levitates them towards the top of the machine, turning it on, and puts them right next to the opening.
“I need to make-”She breaks off, she seems to be trying to hold back a giggle. I think she’s gone insane. She snorts, then seems to get better control of herself. “To make sure it still works. Which one of you volunteer?”
This makes both of the floating ponies start trying to push the other one in front of themselves. she puts them down. “But I’d rather not waste two amusing ponies like yourselves. Instead-” This time she actually bursts out in laughter. It isn’t an insane laugh, its the type of laugh like she's hiding something. “Sorry. Instead, I’ll just get on with the one pegasus I meant to do this to” With this, and a wide grin, she picks up Rainbow Dash in here magic, lifting her up to the top of the machine. Dash is smiling. No, not smiling, it seems like she’s awake and trying to hide a laugh.
I’m fed up. They’re up to something, so I flare my wings, jump, and grab onto Dash. Celestia wasn’t expecting my weight, so here magic falters, and I bring Dash down to the ground. I set her down, and face Celestia.
“What’s going on?!” I shout at her angrily.
All the ponies behind me gasp, and so I turn around, and I’m greeted with the sight of Dash standing up, actually smiling.
“Chill, dad” Its been so long since I’ve heard my daughters voice. “Me and Celestia decided to pull a prank on you when we heard you were here. I was never actually in danger” I’m calmed, and Celestia breaks out into laughter.
“That was perfect! All five of you were completely convinced I was going to murder one of my innocent subjects! Holy shit that was awesome!” She lets out the laugh she’s been holding in this whole time.
“So, she doesn't have some all powerful magic trapped in here body?” I ask.
“Nope! Some slight personality disorders, and mild depression that comes and goes, but thats it” Dash replies. I breath out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding in.
“You can’t do that to me! I nearly had a heart attack!” I scold here.
“Sorry, dad, its just that Celestia came up with this awesome idea...”
The commander guard pegasus speaks up. “So, all this was fake? I was never in actual danger?” I look at the stallion. He’s a large red stallion, slightly smaller than me, his mark is a shield with two swords crossed over it. He has a forward spiked mane, which is red , with the tips died white.
“What’s your name, commander?” Celestia asks him.
“Cold Runner, ma’am” he replies.
“Well, then. Cold Runner, no, you were never in danger. It was all a joke me and Dash here came up with. Did you like it?”
“Like it?! No, it scared the shit outta me! I almost wanna quit”
“Well then you have my sincere apologies. I would like you to stay on the force because you are rather amusing”
“... Alright...” he drags the word out. “Can you at least promise me you won't scare me like that again?”
She gives him a smile. “I can promise that I won’t ever involve you again”
He looks slightly relieved. The he catches the full meaning of what she just said. He narrows his eyes, but says nothing. He walks up to me. “Crazy ponies, eh?” then walks out of the doors. Over his shoulder, He shouts “Come on you three, first round on me. But you three have to each buy me a drink in return” The three of them get up and run after him, down the stairs.
Vinyl looks around, mutters under her breath ‘no need for my bass cannon’ and bucks it down the staircase. We can all hear it has it’s wheels hit each step. Its actually causing quite a commotion, and everypony in the room stares at here. “Can I help you all?” She asks us, pretending that she can’t hear anything.
“Not at all, Vinyl” Dash replies.
We stand around, waiting for something to happen. We’ve reached the climax, saved my daughter from a threat that’s non-existent, but now what? Do we just go home, and pretend nothing happened, or what?
Luna is the first one to speak up. “Sister, I believe you owe them an apology, and so do you, Dash” She says, looking first at Celestia, then focusing her stern gaze on my daughter.
Feeling protective, I get in between Luna and her, saying: “They did nothing wrong, just a joke”
She brings her gaze to focus on me, and I can feel the full power of her stare and dislike, focused on me. Most ponies would cower underneath that glare, but I just stand tall, and look here back right in the eyes. Everpony else can feel the tension building until Vinyl, being the bravest out of the other three, gets in between us, pushing us apart.
Luna looks offended. “How dare you command me, child!”
Vinyl must have a death wish, for she replies “Or what? You’ll banish me to the moon?” The other three take their place at her side.
Luna relents, and she seems to shrink down. “I’m sorry. I was upset for no reason at you sister, and I took it out on them”
“No problem” I say, walking up to here, and gently punching her in the shoulder “we all lose control sometimes. Admitting that how you reacted was wrong is the important part”
Celestia speaks up “Alright, I’m sorry for the joke, if it offended anyone, and I’ll give you each a thousand bits to make up for it. Also, I shall make sure Dash gets the best psychiatric help possible. Deal?”
“Alright!” Vinyl says “As long as we can go home. I’m hungry! I haven't eaten lunch yet” My stomach is rumbling too. so is everyone elses, probably.
“No worries. You all shall eat with me. Come on, I’m sure we can eat now.” Celestia says.