Timed Ramblings

by Midnight herald


Between Light and Shadow

“Hello again, ‘princess’,” It sneered. Twilight shut her eyes, hid in the safety of the darkness behind her lids. “It seems we’ve gotten cocky since my last visit, isn’t that right, Sparkle?” Its seductive, lilting, taunting voice dripped with disdain as sweet and thick and sickening as a cold tincture. “We’ve gotten all righteous and perfect and lovable because we have wings now, eh, Sparkle?” Twilight cringed down further, shielding her head with a shaking foreleg, her eyes still closed, still safe from it.

“Well, let me tell you... You haven’t changed a bit.” it crooned. She could almost hear the predatory smirk that had to be on its face. “Maybe you have some extra limbs and a new cause for your sickening entitlement, but you’re still the same arrogant, lonely, insufferable bookworm you always were and always will be. Right, Sparkle?”

The last two words of its little monologue tickled her ear, sent little prickling mites of fear and shame racing down into her spine. She held back a shudder and curled up tight, with that nasty electric ball of negative emotions caged in her chest, fighting to move. She couldn’t let it happen. She couldn’t let it see its effect on her, even if she already knew it would know. It always knew, in the end.

“N-n-no,” she choked out, her eyes still shut. “I’m n-n-n-not the … same mare I was. I’m better now...”

“Reeally now, Sparkle,” It purred, prowling around behind her. Her feathers picked up the wake it left in the still air, not even an inch from her rigid, fetal pose. “And what in Equestria makes you say that?”

“I have friends now,” she whispered, fervent as any prayer. “I have friends and they make me better.” Her courage finally stirred and showed its head, moving sluggishly up her frigid, tingling spine and bringing with it the warmth of love, of home, of the Sun. “I have friends, and they love me. They tell me when I’m wrong and help me become right again. They find me when I’m lost and trust me to do the same. They give me courage and strength, and they give me a place in the world, one that I helped carve out. They stand beside me and show me how to stand on my own.”

She uncurled her wings from around her sides and moved into a sitting position. She still slumped, but there was a dignity to her drooping that hadn’t existed before. But still her eyes stayed shut. They had to be shut, because she couldn’t stand to see what it truly was.

It had always been there in her head, the little, snide voice that drew her away from the world and into her studies, that drove her to be the best with no exceptions, no distractions. The voice that spurred her towards greatness, but that scolded and insulted her, that tore down what tattered confidence she had left when she did something wrong. It was the voice that had shown her the way to power, that had hatched Spike. But it was also the voice that told her what a show-off she would be, going against Trixie. The voice that told her how fickle her newfound ‘friends’ really were. The voice that spoke of banishments and dungeons and magic kindergarten. The voice that gave in to Discord’s games. The voice that reminded her, over and over, how truly unprepared she was for anything important.

And it had been just that, a voice. Heard, but not seen. And it had stayed that way until the Crystal Empire, when she truly saw what it was. That voice was a part of her. Regal, disdainful, with a greyed-out coat and eyes that shone with Shadow magics, with her face, her Mark, her identity. And so she stayed brave behind her closed eyes and sat a little straighter.

“Excuse me, Sparkle? You have friends?” It chuckled. “Please! They’re not your friends, they’re just another hand-out from the Princess. You don’t stand on your own hooves, she props you up with these fake companions and continues to run your life and your fate.

“They’re not friends, Twilight. They’re your fellow Elements of Harmony. They couldn’t hate you if they tried. It’s sad, really. The six of you, tied together by destiny, stuck together for the rest of their pithy mortal lives so that Celestia can have her little watchdogs.”

Twilight sank down again, stroking her tail compulsively as she shivered openly on the ground. “No... no... no...” She whimpered, over and over and over. It snickered as it paced around her again, sending fresh shudders down her wings as tears seeped through her tightly shut eyelids. “It’s just a dream, just a dream, just a dream,” Twilight murmured, trying her hardest to take control of it, to just this once have some sway over it in the battle for her unconscious mind.

“But dreams are truths themselves, are they not, Twilight Sparkle?” It sneered. Princess Luna had told her that once, and those very words were tainted by its poisoned tongue. It chuckled and caressed her tearstained muzzle with a gentle hoof. Twilight tasted bile in the back of her throat, hot and bitter and repulsive. “Your so-called friends and you are tied together by the Rainbow of Harmony. WIthout it you would still be alone... disgusting … worthless … It’s not friendship you’re feeling, Sparkle. It’s Destiny.”
TIME LIMIT-----------------

Twilight whimpered in the cold darkness she sat in, her stomach turning with each smooth stroke of its hoof against her face.

“That is the biggest pile of horseapples I’ve heard, an’ with a sister like mine, that’s sayin’ something,” a voice called out. Applejack! Twilight jerked upright and swiveled her ears desperately.

“Yeah, we don’t care about the Elements,” Rainbow Dash snapped, off to her right. “Twilight’s our friend for more than that, and she knows it!”

“Perhaps the Elements and Destiny played their parts in our meeting her, but we truly care about Twilight for more than that. We see the truly humble, beautiful powerful, tenderhearted mare in her, and we love that Twilight, not just the one who saves the world.” Rarity. Twilight found her legs and shakily stumbled towards their voices, still safe behind her closed eyes.

“Twilight doesn’t have to worry about that Destiny nonsense getting in the way of it. She’s not just our friend, she’s our best friend, you jerk. So don’t you go messing with her pretty little head, or we’ll do much more than yell at you!” Twilight had never heard Pinkie so angry with anything before, and the snarl in her normally bubbly voice was as frightening as it was empowering.

She stumbled over something, but Fluttershy was there with a warm wing to steady her, to guide her towards the others. She leaned into her friend’s cascading, silky mane and chattered her teeth with the shock and pain of it all. “It’s alright, Twilight,” Fluttershy murmured. “Luna got us, told us what was happening.That thing... that monster … can’t touch you anymore. You’re safe now, I promise.” She nodded and wept and whimpered as Fluttershy guided her to the open arms, the open hearts of her friends, her amazing, beautiful friends.

“Twilight?” Fluttershy continued, soft and gentle and warm. Warm like home, warm like the sun, warm like love. “You can open your eyes now.”

Twilight slowly let her sore and salty lids flutter up and looked around in wonder. The world was light, the world was warmth, and it was nowhere to be found. Instead, her friends crowded ‘round her with smiles and eyes full of warmth and sunlight and love. Everything was alright. Everything was beautiful, Destiny be damned.