That’s How We Roll in Appleloosa – by VeganCheesecake
The Trollfic Version
It was a frickin’ hot day in Appleloosa. Six manes…no, mane sixs…wait…six ponies! Six ponies left threain and looged around.
“Hey there!” said a random hyperactive pony wearing a funny hat.”Up for a Wild West Dance? That’s how we roll in Aaaaaaaaaaappleloooooosa!!!!11!1!!!111!!”
“WTFBBQ? Ya’ ain’t got no pancake mix!” replied a pinkie stinky …soemthings wrong. I dunno. Oh yes…
Replied Pinkie Pie pink pony. She was wearing a funnier hat made of a brown, wobbly mass.
A third pony with a funny hat tssarted to speak. She looked leik the hyperactive one, but had nothing that schlong…strong…lgon thing between her legs.
“Ladies, may I present to you…”
“No, Appleloooooooooooosa!” is what the crazy pony with the funny hat (the first one) said and grabbed the six ponies with his hoofs. “Now let us dance! Because that’s how we roll here.”
And so, everybody pony…no, offensive…every pony and other creature danced the schloppy foppy polka pony pooper pants dance. (Author’s note: The schloppy foppy polka pony pooper pants dance should not be attempted to be danced by amateurs. It is a profession…highly hard...very difficult piece of art to dance the schloppy foppy polka pony pooper pants dance.)
Next, the funny pony…funny hat of the pony…pony with the funny hat, but with less thing between her legs opened her mouth but the other one with the schlong…long and hard thing between his legs said “Nopeydokey! We must now drinkt eh traditional drink because we are thirsty!”
At the bar, they seen a pony drunk on the dratradiotional drink of the village “because that’s how we roll in Aaaaaaaaappleloosa.” It was delicious salt. Salt was very popul.ar and made you damn drunbk by just one cup of a sip one sip on a cup. They were drinking mugs. Much bader than a cup.
“Wooooooooo!” said a pony without a funny had but a long, stiff thing on her head betwenn the hair of her mane. “This is storng stuff that is not in my book. I need to do SCIENCE on it!”
The hyperactive pohny and noth the one with the squishy…wasn’t it…schwabbly…wobbly mass on the hat on her head. He did. Open his mouth and drink like the others butaa not that becoming drunk became has had after. The tohers very rdrunk. Can’te vent ypae anydoaermore.
“Now has the chesse spilled the beans?” the poop hat like piece on it pony asked.
“Yes, that’s how we roll in Appleloosa.”
Inafter barvisit, another one of the ponies but white said “Halt! Hammerzeit! Was eest es what we want?!”
“I think we want to plant a tree”, the pony that can’t sign…simm…sing but jodel said.
“Nooooo, Appleloooosa!” his cousin added. “Cause’ we roll like this here.”
And then somewhere in China, a bird exploded. It caused a bag of rice to spill its contents. Now back to Pony Universe, we’re currently in another dimension.
(intermezzo)
(lots of cheese and champagne)
(naked dancers)
…
WHERE WAS I?!
Oh yes. Now thry all planted a tree. That’s not how they roll in Appleloosa, but they wanted to do it because has come they for htsi. THE END.