Almost Everything You Wanted To Know About Breaking The Fourth Wall (But Were Afraid To Ask)
You and Pinkie Pie have been dating for the past few weeks now since that party. You feel like you have really gotten close to her. But, an hour ago you were watching TV and now you’re being pulled through the doors of Sugar Cube Corner. She had told you that if you were to keep dating her, that you would have to know a deep secret. One that not even her best friends in the whole world know...
"Come on it'll be cool." Pinkie had tried to persuade you.
"No Pinkie. my favorite show is about to come on. I have popcorn and everything!" you had whined. Big mistake.
She then grabbed you by your ear and pulled you across town. Must be something important, you wondered, or she secretly kills people... nah. She slammed open the doors of Sugar Cube and grabbed a plastic yellow chair with metal legs.
Pinkie Pie threw you into the chair that was moved in front of the pink wall of Sugar Cube Corner. She had an army general suit on. It was an army green helmet, with a camouflage green tank top. She even had dog tags! You gave her a confused look and slumped down into the seat. You have no idea why Pinkie is doing this. All you had asked was, 'Why are you talking to the wall?' before you're show was coming on, you didn't think she would actually show you. You thought she would just give you one of her normal answers like "There are people out there!" or "I'm talking to the bronies!" whatever those are... But, this time she said that she'll show you.
"You're probably wondering why you’re here." Pinkie Pie began.
"Actually... I am." you roll your eyes.
Pinkie stopped. "Really? Well, okay. You're here because I'm going to teach you how to break the fourth wall. Like I do!" Pinkie smiled brightly straight in your face. She smelled like double glazed doughnuts covered with rainbow sprinkles.
"The fourth wall? What the heck is the fourth wall?" you turn your head.
"The fourth wall is sort of like an invisible line that separates our world with the real world." Pinkie whispered. Pinkie never made any sense, but this was a new level of weirdness.
"Um... this world feels pretty real to me." You're just getting more confused. Real world? Fourth Wall? This all sounds like madness to you.
"Oh but it isn't! There is a world far beyond our little world of Equestria. You see, the truth is... we're in a story. A written fiction from the mind of a random brony in the United States Of America. Of course, you wouldn't know what that is yet. You're not that far in training yet." Pinkie whispered again, closer this time. Almost like she didn't want anybody else to hear. One of her curls was getting in your face, but it didn't matter. You felt it best if you left now, before things got any more weird.
"Well Pinkie Pie, uh, this has been fun. I’m just gonna go-" you get pushed back into the chair. Pinkie Pie is pointing her little finger at you.
"Oh no, no, no, no, no. You still have a whoooole hour of learning to get catched up on!" she giggled at you. Now you're getting scared. Me and my big mouth... you wince.
Pinkie continues, "Okay! So, the first thing to remember about breaking the fourth wall is that there is always somebody out there watching you! Since we live in Equestria it's probably a brony who is watching us right now."
"What's a brony?" you ask.
Pinkie smile grows larger. She must be pretty fond of these brony thingies... you think.
"A brony is an adult male or female who watches My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. Which is the show that we would normally be ponies in, if TheGuardianOfBooks didn't turn us into humans!" Pinkie cocked her head back and laughed, then appeared to look right through you, "You're a brony too. That's right! I'm talking to you reader!"
You look back at the wall. Maybe there is somebody back there... you thought, If there really is somebody watching me. Would it be me? Or could it be somebody else? Dang, this is just flat out crazy!
"Okay. So I get that there are these... bronies. Out there somewhere watching-" you start.
"Reading! Remember we're in a fanfic!" Pinkie corrects you.
"Reading... About us... and we're actually suppose to be ponies but some chick named TheGuardianOfBooks turned us into humans?"
"That is most certainly correct." Pinkie took off her hard hat and placed it on the store counter. That was pretty quick! you admit to yourself. It has only been 37 minutes. There couldn't possibly be more? Could there? There was.
Pinkie opened her mouth once again to speak.
"You getting very good at this! Now how about you talk to yourself? This fanfic is in second person after all. After, you do that you can go!" She pointed at the wall and motioned you to the side, "And you get a cupcake."
"Um... hey self? You a brony?" you stutter. Gosh! I sound like a crazy person!
"That show's pretty cool huh? With Pinkie Pie and all... she's just so crazy! Breaking the fourth wall and stuff! And look, hah! She's got me doing it too! Now how about you go read another chapter since, I think this one is almost over." you continue triumphantly. You have no idea if what you're saying makes you look like somebody who needs to be put in a Mental Asylum, but it seemed to please Pinkie Pie. She giggled loudly at your words and pulled you up from the chair. She leaned in close to you and said, "Now, I need you to Pinkie Promise that you won't tell anyone in Equestria that I told you about this."
"Pinkie Promise?" you wince.
"Yes." she prompted.
"Fine. I cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." you sighed out the words to the rhyme.
"Oh! And I'll see you next practice, m'kay?" She gave you a small, sweet smile and sent you out the door. You smiled lightly back.
Just another day in Equestria, right?