The Adventure of Flynn Rider

by Chadbane

Part I - "Flynn Rider Reborn" (Repaving)

This is the story of how I, Flynn Rider, was reborn... Don't get me wrong, it wasn't like I wasn't already alive when I was reborn, but my name had died. You see what I'm saying? Anyway, our story takes place in the midst of a usual Monday morning. Like any other story worth remembering, this story begins with a single sentence. Oh, wait! Before we get started, just try reading this story in my voice. Who knows what kinds of possibilities will open up? Excellent, we all good to go? Fantastic. So, once upon a time, long ago, or more accurately, earlier that same week...

I awoke after an incredibly sleepless night to the warm rays of the spring afternoon sun. Yep, life in the palace was great. I got to sleep in on weekdays, on weekends, during parties, and pretty much whenever I wanted. That is, except when I had work to do. Now, don't go judging me, I'm not a lazy person. In fact, if I had been lazy all my life, I would have been thrown into a prison cell a long time ago. That only goes to remind me of what a good thing it is that I met my wife before any of that could happen! Rapunzel, my beautiful child-like wife had saved my life, and I had saved hers--not to brag or anything. I recall it always being a wonderful feeling to return home from the court of justice and catch her awaiting me with open arms.

I admired my child-like wife. And I still do. I admired the way her spirit could lift me up, even in the deepest of my sorrows. I admired the beauty of her voice and her lips, which brought me comfort in my distress. I admired the the way she looked at me while on the balcony, or while in the throne room. I even admired her in the shower--especially in the shower. There might be a few minors present, so I'll skip the details on what that means. So Anyway, like I said, I awoke from a terrible night of sleep to the wonderful beauty of a spring afternoon. Even so, I recall being very optimistic of that day. "I hate Mondays." I muttered. What? I know you that hate Mondays too! Don't try to trick the trickster, sly one.

In the spirit of early in the afternoon, I began to dress. I remember leaping from my bed, which only I lay in apparently. In case you didn't already know, that is one of the trade-offs of being married to an early bird. You awake by yourself. That being said, I quickly pulled on my clothes, which contained a wide variety of gold and jewelry, and escorted myself to the exit of my grand bedroom. Knocking on the doors, my personal guards quickly opened them for me and prepared to escort me to the palace of justice. That's where I did most of my work in the palace. And, if I may add, the king himself, or as I respectfully call him, grandpa, thought me wise enough to do so. I can't say that I blame him. Don't you think?

In a nutshell, it was just like every old day I was used to. Like usual, the guards escorted me to the palace, which was boring. I did some judging and executed a few criminals, which was boring. Then I made my rounds around the castle to find weakness and repair it--which was boring. And then finally, after that long boring and tiring day, I burst into my resting chambers only to find my beautiful wife awaiting me in bed. We had only been married a year, and I'd been loving her for a year. Don't get me wrong, no marriage is perfect, but because of the choice we made to love each other forever, we could always overcome anything. Together. Wait... that sentiment didn't even belong in this paragraph! Eh, oh well.

That pretty much raps up Monday, so lets get to Tuesday! In a nutshell, I woke up, took a shower, got dressed, did some judging, secured the castle, then returned home and got my rest for the next morning. Okay, NOW we get to the interesting day! Wednesday was like any other normal day you could expect. I woke up, took a shower, and got dressed, but this time something different was going to happen. I'm not going to spoil it now, but just you wait and see for yourself. So I knocked on my bedroom doors, and the royal palace guards were quick to open them for me. "Good morning!" I said as courteous as ever.

"Good morning, sire!" they saluted.

Yeah, castle life was hard work, but it was also kind of awesome. Anyway, they quickly escorted me to the palace of justice. This is where I carried out the kings will, and where I judged affairs between the people and ruled them out. After arriving through the great walls of justice, and past the fountain of justice, and along the paintings of justice, and pretty much a lot of justice stuff, I arrived in the great hall of justice. Right there, smacked right underneath the symbol of our great kingdom, sat my lovely chair. I'm sorry, that was too humble. Did I say chair? I mean't enormous golden throne. I'm a prince, remember? I could still see the glittering letters of my name Eugene Fitzherbert written above it in golden letters. Oh yeah, that chair--excuse me, throne, had me written all over it. Literally.

So what I did that day was trek up the mountain of stairs leading to it and then sit down and address the people. As usual, a lot of sob stories poured in with idiots arguing over who had stolen who's sheep, and who had murdered this guy, and pretty much every case you could expect in a court was held that day. Completely boring stuff. That is, until the last visitor came in. "Your highness!" Gallagher, one of the royal guards addressed me. His words had torn me from a lovely daydream I was having. It was about me, and I was running away from a herd of angry cows. What else do you dream of when you're bored?

"Yes, captain?" I replied.

"Shall we remove him?"

Gallagher was referring to a peasant that apparently had been speaking to me during my daydream. I couldn't recall what his case was about over the sheer epic of my daydream, but I had to at least PRETEND that I was listening.

"Well, Mr. Cobblepot," I began to say.

"It's Mr. Cobsworth, sir." he corrected me.

"Right. Anyway, it isn't my fault that you're out of... of... what was it again?"

"Food."

"Food, right, I knew that. Anyway it's not my fault you're out of--wait you said food? When are your crops sprouting this year?"

"During the fall, your majesty."

"Well, then I hereby declare that you be exempt from taxes until the fall this year. Thank you, Mr. Cobblepot."

"Its Cobsworth, your majesty."

"Right. Gallagher, judgment final!"

I ended my ruling with a gathering of my fist. Oh yeah, I was an awesome judge. Moving on, the messenger boy burst into the room, preparing to announce the next case. Thankfully for me, it was the last case of the day. "Mrs. Fritcher, case ten thousand one hundred and fifty six. Mrs. Fritcher is charged with stealing and practicing the forbidden arts of witchcraft." he announced.

My ears perked up at the change of subject. It wasn't anything near as boring as that stolen chicken stuff. Okay, maybe still a little boring, but interesting just the same. "Send her in." I ordered wisely. Try repeating my words in the serious tone I did, and you'll fail every single time. Trust me.

So anyway, a cranky old lady in a large black robe was escorted into the throne room with a couple of palace guards. She seemed as guilty as an alligator with feathers in his mouth. I remember lightening up despite the menacing appearance she bestowed. That case was so up my ally. "This is the witch?" I asked coolly.

"That is correct, your highness." one of the guards confirmed.

I nodded, trying to give the impression that I was really into the case. All honesty present, I wasn't actually giving it my full attention. But, you're a great audience, so I'm cool with sharing this stuff with you. Anyway, I quickly made up my mind on what to do, especially since I was apparently deep in thought. "Well then give her the usual punishment." I commanded.

"A hanging, your highness?" Gallagher asked curiously. I don't remember exactly what I looked like when I thought of how stupid I felt for not being specific on what I meant like an actual judge. Then again, I'm reminded now that I was also a prince. "What? No! Do you take me for a softy? Burn her at the stake!" I ordered. I admit It was a small emotional outburst, but it wasn't anything I couldn't fix, seeing that I was prince and all. "Yes, sir!" they saluted. Just as they were proceeding to leave the hall, something ran across my mind and alerted me of a startling realization. I hadn't seen the evidence yet. "Wait!" I called. Both the guards and the witch wheeled around and faced me. "What did she steal?" I asked inquisitively. I was really on the top of my game now!

Moving on anyway, one of the guards presented to me a small black cube. I don't recall it being any bigger than my hand. It instantly reminded my of a rubik cube. Inwardly, I actually hoped that it was, that way I could confiscate it and use it later. Don't think I'm greedy, I would have given it back. Trust me. Anyhow, the guard tossed the cube to Gallagher and Gallagher brought it to me. I observed the small cube and found nothing conspicuous about it. After tossing it a few times in my hand and displaying a few tricks, I flipped the cube (If that's even possible) back into Gallaghers hand. "What is it worth?" I asked suspiciously.

"Nothing sire, but reports say that Mrs. Fritcher was seen using the forbidden arts of witchcraft upon it." the prosecutor speculated.

"How did she do that?" I proceeded to ask.

"By casting a spell on it." he replied.

"What was the spell?"

"Nobody knows."

"Then where is the evidence that she is a witch?"

"There is none, my lord. Regarding she being a witch, that was an anonymous accusation."

"But can it be proven that she stole? And if so, what did she steal?"

My talent on this stuff is surprising, isn't it? So the prosecutor proceeded to explain to me that Mrs. Fritcher had stolen the cube, and the reason she was accused of being a witch was because the cube had no apparent use. "Oh," I said. "Well in that case, instead of burning her just throw her in the dungeon for a month or so. That'll teach her from stealing. Good case, gentlemen! Judgment final!" The guards saluted and went to do as they were told. Yep, I was the man. The guards were probably inwardly applauding me, but I was too humble to demand for them show it. At that moment, I stepped down from my throne and prepared to inspect the castle as I always did.

When you are a prince, life is smooth sailing. Sort of. Moving on, I was eager to finish up my work and head home. Just then, I spotted the prosecutor leaving the hall of justice with the cube I had passed judgment over in his hands. "Prosecutor!" I called. Something about the cube had interested me. If that cranky old lady wasn't a witch as I had believed, why would she steal a plain old cube? I didn't know, but when Flint Rider sets his mind to do something, he keeps to it until the end! "Yes, sire?" he replied. I steadily paced over to him, careful not to bounce the sword on my side all about. It was another one of those trade offs of being a prince. You had to walk around with a nice fancy sword everywhere.

"Who does that cube belong to?" I politely asked. I was trying to be courteous in the way I asked him for what he was holding.

"To you, sire. It was taken from our archives of astrology." he replied.

I was shocked, but instantly delighted. If it was mine I didn't have to buy it from anybody. However, it also made me wonder what else I owned that I did not know of. "Well then, may I take it with me?" I asked. If he had said 'no,' I instantly would have fired him. Good thing he knew what to say.

"Of course! What is yours is yours, your majesty!" he replied.

I was being escorted to my quarters after a long and tiring day. I could hardly wait to embrace the warmth of my wife as It was I had been shivering in the cold. One quick fact about Flint Rider though, he doesn't get cold, because he's always cool. If you've read this far, you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, as I neared my quarters I respectfully excused my guards from their escort and began to fiddle with my trusty old satchel. I had been using this satchel since before I was a prince, and I still used it even when I was. I didn't wear it, of course, it was just a little something I liked to bring with me when I secured the kingdom. As I fiddled with it, my hand felt a bulge imploding into my satchel. It was interesting because I had placed the cube in there, and I would have been expecting it to gorge outwards instead of inwards.

I quickly flipped the top of my satchel bag open, and continued towards my quarters. I reached my hand in and pulled out the small black cube and began to inspect it. I remember my eyes widening at the sight that I withheld as I stare at one of the cubes sides. Straight in the middle of one of the sides, there lingered a small blue hole. It was shaded with colors of black, and swirled constantly around like a whirlpool of some sort. I placed my finger over the small area, and then I quickly retreated it at the feeling of suction. It was like some kind of a black hole. The only difference was that it was smaller and it didn't contain a gravitational pull so strong that light couldn't escape it. After I touched it for the first time, I was shocked again when another miniature black hole opened on the other side of the cube.

It was then I realized something very important. Flint Rider hadn't seen everything yet. It wasn't long before the entire cube was covered by miniature black holes. I dropped the cube and began to back away, and it wasn't because I was scared, but rather because I had a case of man-fear. You know, the kind of fear where you wait for something awful to happen and THEN you do something about it? Anyway, the small cube engulfed its self in a black hole generated by its very own nature. I remember thinking, "Why did I have to bring it home?" Just then, the black hole collapsed and burst into an airless blob of nothingness. The suction and the black hole had simply vanished. I remember sighing in relief. I then wheeled around and knocked on my chamber doors behind me. I was confident that my wife would answer shortly, but then at that moment, the most inconvenient thing possible happened. That miniature black hole was reborn.

A flash of light suddenly burst all about me, and an enormous gap between time and space was opened. The mere suction tore me from where I stood and I was tossed into a portal and then right out of the other side. This is where the REAL story begins, and my true adventure!