//------------------------------// // Welcome worthy of royalty // Story: Buck My Life // by JasontheDemon //------------------------------// Welcome worthy of royalty It was well past midnight and I was still awake. Why you may ask? Because I needed to make sure Twilight didn’t see me make my move... I had to leave. After I told her about my parents and we ate together at the family dinner table, I realized that I couldn’t let her come with me when I went to see Celestia. To make sure her judgement of me would be fair I knew I would have to reveal the truth about humans in it’s entirety, and I couldn’t let Twilight get in the way if I were to be banished. I knew what kind of pony she was and I knew that she would do everything in her power to keep me from harm even if I were found to be a threat to all of Equestria. I wanted to make sure things stayed as fair as possible and I got what I deserved... nothing more, nothing less. Like I mentioned before, I am a firm believer in equivalent exchange and I felt that everything would remain in a state of balance. Of course I didn’t want things to end here, but I had to know if I was too corrupt for this world. I didn’t think I was like some of the more wicked people on earth, but who could say I didn’t have some deep darkness in my heart that was dangerous? As a human, I contained the potential for committing horrific acts of violence and the like. I HAD to make sure I wouldn’t be a problem in the future and talking to the princess would be the only way to know. I had been laying in the bed we were to share for at least two hours. The gap between us was large enough so it wasn’t uncomfortable, and I always had a habit of sleeping on the very edge of the bed, with only about three inches supporting me. Once I was positive she was out cold, I gently moved the purple cover off me and moved silently towards the window. Looking out at the city, I could see the castle over the many rooftops scattered between. The window wasn’t one that could be opened by any means other than breaking it, so I would need to teleport. I would have left through the front door but that would risk me running into Velvet or Nightlight, and how could I explain myself there? ‘Oh hello, I was just sneaking out because I might be a ticking timebomb of evil who will unintentionally corrupt this world, so don’t mind me!’. Yeah... definitely not on my ‘to-do’ list. I turned around to see Twilight one last time before leaving. If I was going to the moon, I at least wanted to remember the face of someone who cared about me and she was the only one around. She looked so calm and peaceful there, and as cliche as it sounds, the faint moonlight that illuminated the room almost gave her the look of an angel... a unicorn angel maybe, but still an angel. After I was satisfied and thoroughly believed that her image was sufficiently burned into my mind, I began to focus on the teleportation spell. Right before it activated, I quietly whispered, “Goodbye...”, even though I knew she couldn’t have heard it. * * * * * * It took a few moments for my head to vision to clear from the long range teleport, but I was now at my destination... Canterlot Castle. It was enormous to say the least. It must have been at least as large as a football stadium if I had to guess, and that’s not counting the towering spires that decorated it. While I was marvelling at the monument of engineering in front of me, I heard a shout come from one of the towers. “HALT! WHO GOES THERE!” I turned my attention to the voice and saw none other than Luna. If I knew how ponies did the ‘squee’ I would have done it at least five times at the sight of her. Luna was way better than Celestia in my opinion. Not only did she have an awesome personality, but I believed that making night was a hundred times harder than making day. If you think of all the stars Luna would need to paint the sky with every night, it made Celestia look like a slacker. All she did is raise the sun. Making night was an art form in my eyes. I had tried to make convincing stars in my art before and it is tough as hell! I thought Luna deserved much more respect than she got for her hard work. Getting irritated at my long bout of silence, Luna dropped down from her post and asked again... in the Canterlot Voice, “WHO ART THOU?!” Everything blurred from the loud wail of the princess. Whenever things were too loud, my vision would be the first thing to go. My eyes would cross and unfocus to the point where I couldn’t tell which way was up. It was an experience that I hated and would flip out over. “SHUT UP! MY GOSH! It’s like you’re TRYING to destroy my eardrums!” I yelled furiously. “My apologies, the voice is a hard habit to drop, but nopony is allowed to visit without written consent at these hours. I suggest you go back home, whoever you are.”, Luna said as she walked the other way. “Oh right, my name is Jason. I’m supposed to see Celestia today. I guess I should have mentioned that.” I said trotting up behind her. Suddenly, she stopped and glanced back at me. “Jason, you say?” A small smile formed on her lips before she quickly hollered, “GUARDS!” In an instant two of the guards that I believed to be a part of the stonework moments before, came rushing at me. My brain switched over to defensive mode and I got ready to counter. The first guard was an earth pony by the looks of it so I took advantage of that. in one fluid motion, I sidestepped and gave a quick jab to an unprotected portion of his neck right behind his jawline. His head jerked to the side and his limbs went stiff, causing him to come crashing to the ground, however I was only paying attention to the second guard who was flying at me. He was a pegasus... and just as dumb as the previous guard. I simply moved with the same flowing technique to the left this time and spun slightly as I went for his wing. I curled my right arm around and positioned it to catch the feathered appendage. After it touched my inner elbow, I placed my left hoof over the other side, locking it in place. I leaned back and used my weight against him. His velocity combined with me as the ballast, sent us into a spin and I let go just at the point where he would be sent hurtling into the front castle doors. I had taken out two of the castle guards in less than three seconds... all because they were ordered to attack me out of nowhere. I hated violence, but I hated being a punching bag even more. My eyes locked on to Luna with a cold anger. Why would she order the guards to attack me for no reason?! I quickly got my answer. “You are indeed him alright... Sorry but I had to make sure. Ponies have been known to impersonate just about anypony in order to get a private audience with my sister. The only way I could have know it was you is by testing you in combat. Not everypony can take down a griffin alone, so I just thought that I would give you an equally challenging fight... it was the only test we could think of due to the vague details in Twilight Sparkle's letters.” “Wait you attacked me just to see if I was me? Excuse me for saying this, but... THAT'S RETARDED! What would you have done if I got my butt handed to me?! Say ‘nice try, but better luck next time’?! Am I the only sane one in this world of pastel talking horses!?!” Luna blushed, “When you put it that way it does seem to make no sense... But you should take that up with Celestia! It was her idea!” Luna then got uncomfortably close to me and quietly whispered, “And just between you and me, I think she was a little tipsy when she thought of it.” The downed guards groaned as they got up, catching Luna’s attention. “May I ask how you did that to them? Never before have I seen anypony defeat the royal guard so quickly.” “I just took advantage of a few pressure points. A few days ago I decided to read up on pony anatomy to discover any weaknesses to the pony body, you know... just in case something were to happen where I would need it. Oh and would you look at this! I was right!” I said with bitter sarcasm. Right after I revealed my technique to Luna, the palace doors swung wide open and standing there in front of us was Celestia. “Sister! What are you doing up?! My shift is not even close to being over!” Luna exclaimed in what could be considered panic. “Really now Luna, you mustn't be so protective of me. I am fine and a little less sleep won’t kill me... I see our guest has arrived.” Celestia said with an amazingly harmonious voice. If I had to guess I would have said that she would make an excellent lead singer in a band. Her size caught me off guard to say the least. She towered over me as if I was a small child. She must have been at least two and a half times bigger than me. My fear of her size paled in comparison to my fear of her power. From here on out I would have to remember to be on my best behavior or risk a free trip into space. Celestia took a moment to look around before asking, “Forgive me if I’m wrong, but weren’t you coming with Twilight?” “She, uh, said I could come on my own...” I lied. Celestia lowered her head to look me in the eye. “Did she also say that you are a dreadful liar?” ‘Oh crap! I only said one thing and I already screwed up! I’m dead! I AM SOOOO DEAD!’, I thought to myself, practically wetting my pants (if I had any to begin with that is). From all the lore that surrounded Celestia, one move could be the difference between being fine and being toast. And from the looks of it... I just royally burned myself. Right as I was ready to count myself out, Celestia’s expression turned to that of warmth and understanding. “Don’t worry though, you must have your reasons, but from now on please do try to be honest with me. Deal?” She said with a motherly smile. Relieved that I hadn’t blown it, I nodded quickly. Never before had I been so nervous... and I didn’t know why. I was fine with death at this point. Come to think of it, I wasn’t afraid to die on Earth either. If I had died, I wouldn’t have been upset or anything. I might have been comfortable with the idea because it meant eternal peace, and I always pushed myself to the point of agony. However, now I was suddenly afraid of what might happen. This shouldn’t have been the case. I should have cared even less about my sentence since I was stuck in a land where I had no use in life, but something drove me to gain a favourable spot in the regal ponies eyes. Celestia turned to the palace doors and calmly said, “Let us find a more private area to speak... please follow me.” I did as I was told and trailed closely behind. I thought I would have to speed up to match her pace, but she seemed to be walking more slowly for my sake. I could have chalked it up to my imagination, although her body language gave me the belief that she truly did put me into consideration. As we walked the halls, the sun princess occasionally glanced at me. The look in her eyes showed faint signs of curiosity from my perspective. It took a while, but we eventually reached a large room that looked like it was meant for two to talk together. The furniture consisted of one table and two chairs seated on opposite sides. Other than that, there wasn’t much to it. Large portraits of Celestia and Luna adorned the walls and there were some potted ferns in the corners, but still the room felt relatively empty. The walls were pink and trimmed with white moulding. The windows were slim, but tall and accented with red curtains that matched the carpet. All in all, it looked like a room suited for royalty. Celestia took a seat in one of the chairs and gestured for me to sit across from her. This was it... I was going to discover how fit I was to be here. I calmed my nerves and strode over to my designated seat. I sat there in front of her with a blank expression. Celestia leaned forward and placed her elbows on the table with her hooves set together. Her stern and serious stare told me I was going to be in for one heck of a discussion. The white alicorn inhaled through her nose, sat up straight, showing her grand stature and air of power and then... pleasantly asked me, “Would you like one lump of sugar or two with your tea?” I was confused as to if she was serious. Sitting there, mouth agape, I thought to myself, ‘Is this some sort of test? Didn’t she ask me to come for a more important reason than to drink tea?!’. I couldn’t help myself but to ask, “What did you just say?”. In a flash a platter appeared with a pot, two cups, and one bowl of sugar cubes on it. “I said ‘one lump or two with your tea’?” I wasn’t in the mood for games at this time... I wanted answers. I slammed my hoof on the table and snapped, “I didn’t come for some stupid tea! Stop jerking me around and get to the point!” Celestias warm smile disappeared and was replaced with a look of calm seriousness. “I was hoping we could keep the atmosphere light and friendly while we were speaking... you see I don’t enjoy these talks and would rather make them feel more pleasant through any means I can, but I see you want to do this the same way as taking off a bandage. Quick and sharp. Very well, let’s begin.” The tea and everything that came with it vanished and was instantly replaced by a few scrolls. There was something oddly familiar about one of them. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why it stood out, until Celestia unrolled it in front of me and I began to read. Dear Princess Celestia, I just met the most remarkable stallion yesterday. I didn’t believe it at the time, but he is from another world! He calls it ‘Urth’ and he says that he was this monkey thing called a ‘human’! I find it strange that he doesn’t use magic, but he says it doesn’t exist. He is the only unicorn I have ever met that doesn’t believe in magic. He said that his name is Jason (weird name if you ask me) and he is trying to find a way to make it back home. I am afraid that he won’t make it and his efforts are in vain, but I think he is a nice guy and I wouldn’t mind if he were to stay. Right now we are in the scheduled thunderstorm and he is making music through this one shiny black thing he calls an ‘MP3’ to help me forget about it. He may act like a jerk sometimes, but deep down he has a good hea/\/\/\/ Sorry but he just ran off. I need to go find him. I’ll fill you in on the next letter. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle It was the letter she was writing on my second day in Equestria... and she misspelled ‘Earth’. What really surprised me was how much she talked about me. She based her entire letter on me. I wasn’t that interesting so why talk about me? What had I done that was so great? “She cares for you deeply... more than you may realize. I have looked into your heart and I see that you are a decent pony and a good friend. From the stories I have heard, you stick up for those around you and you will do what you can to make others feel better before yourself. You do have a fire in you that can get out of control, and you seem to have encased your feelings and emotions in ice, but they are beginning to thaw by the looks of it. One thing that really bothers me is your connection to love and caring emotions. They are almost gone entirely... almost. You are strong and persistent, though you have many scars from past experiences. Your emotions are bottled up and dying to get out, however you refuse to give in to them. Whether this is from trying to be tough or caused by your previous tribulations, I am not certain. All I can say for sure though is that your heart appears to be in the right place.” “I’m surprised I still have a heart to speak of... my best friend used to say that if you opened my chest, all you would find is a black hole where my heart should be.” I quickly retorted. “And you know what? I agreed with him...” Celestia sighed and responded, “It is true that your heart is in rough shape... but that doesn’t mean it’s gone. In fact, I often find it is the ones in the rough that turn out to be diamonds in the end. Twilight was actually not too far from you in the case of your loneliness.” I raised an eyebrow, “Who said I was lonely?” “Your heart did... it is screaming it. Though, we don't need to discuss that anymore. We have more pressing matters to speak of. The things your heart can’t tell me. Your past, your values, and your thoughts... I need you to tell me everything you can if that is alright with you.” I took a deep breath and exhaled. “Okay... but you may want to grab a snack. This is going to take a while...”