//------------------------------// // Regenerating Bastards // Story: The Stallion in the Library // by leonidas701 //------------------------------//         “So, my dad made all these paper stars, and he numbered them from 1-35.” Card told Twilight.         “Really?” Twilight said as she balanced on a ladder to reorganize the library books, “What did - give me that book would you - did he do with them?” Today they were talking about the most annoying lessons they had ever had. The subject had come up after Twilight came across a particularly brutal form of testing in one of her books, and she mentioned it after Card came in. Right now it was Card's turn and he was talking about how his dad helped him learn about factors and prime numbers.         “What he did was he set up this game where I would take a number and add that to my score, and he would take all of the numbers that factored into it and multiplied them all together,” Card said as he hoofed up another stack of books to Twilight, “It took me 4 weeks to finally beat that game."         "Really?" Twilight said with a skeptical look on her face. "Four whole weeks?"         "Well every time I did beat it, he would raise the amount of points that I had to win by," Card admitted. "First by ten, then twenty, and so on."         “Oh. Well did it help you?” Twilight asked as she moved over to a new shelf.         “Kinda, but like most of the things he used to teach me, it had a second purpose.”         “Oh? What was that?”         “It was a way of teaching me how to keep track of everything at once, and to account for all of the possible way something could be altered, and how to narrow down those elements to your advantage.”         “Was that all?” Twilight said as she came to the final shelf.         “Well, no,” Card admitted, “It did also leave me with an irrational hatred of starfish.” Twilight gave a short laugh and then put the last book away.         “There,” she said with a look of satisfaction on her face, “All done.”         “Great,” Card said as he reached into his jacket, “Now unless something else happens, we can watch th-”         *Knock Knock Knock* Card let out a sigh. “Dangit.”         “I’ll get it,” Twilight said as she went to the door, to find behind it a downtrodden Pinkie Pie.         “Oh, hi Pinkie.” Twilight waved her friend in, “Come on in.” As Pinkie came into the library, she froze upon seeing a certain orange stallion at one of the tables. She started shaking like she was trying really hard to not run away. Twilight, noticing her friends discomfort, followed her eyes back to Card. After a brief moment of confusion, she remembered the incident at S.C.C. and how badly Pinkie reacted to it. Twilight then said to Card, “I think that you might want to leave, Pinkie seems to be uncomfortable around you.”         “Yeah ok.” Card said with a sigh, “When you’re done talking to her, come and find me. I’ll be at the cafe.” He picked up the book he was reading and left. Upon the door closing behind him, Pinkie Pie visibly relaxed.         “Now,” Twilight said as she turned to Pinkie, “What did you want to talk about?” -----Now, time for time warp! 30 minutes later at the cafe.-----         “Yo, Twinkly,” Card shouted as he saw Twilight walk up the street. “Over here.”         “Hey Card,” Twilight said as she sat down at the table in front of the cafe. “Sorry for taking so long.”         “Don’t worry about it,” Card said with a shake of his head while he tucked his book back into his jacket. “I hope you don’t mind that I ordered for you.”         Twilight looked down and saw that there was indeed a daisy sandwich in front of her. “Oh, my favorite!” she said. “How did you know?”         “You almost always order the exact same thing, I just told the waitress to bring me the usual for you,” Card said.         “Oh,” Twilight said as she realized just how often she had been eating at the cafe. Come think of it, when was the last time I ate lunch at home? “Well, thanks anyways. you even remembered the extra hay fries for Spike.” She then dove into her sandwich. Card was polite enough to let her get in a few bites before he interrupted her.         “So, what did Pie want to talk to you about?” Card asked.         Twilight hesitated for a moment before saying, “She was just feeling a bit neglected.” Twilight said haltingly, “You see Rainbow’s old friend came into town today, and when she took up all of Rainbow’s attention Pinkie felt a bit left out.”         “Really,” Card said with a look of thought on his face.         “Yeah. She even got the idea that Gilda, that’s the name of Rainbow’s friend, was being mean to her on purpose. She said that Gilda was really grumpy, that she popped her balloons, that she told her to buzz off, and she seemed to be really hung up on it.”         “Huh. So, what did you tell her.”         “I told her that since Rainbow hadn’t seen Gilda in so long, then she would want to spend a lot of time with her. I also told her that she was probably blowing things a bit out of proportion due to her jealousy, and that she needed to take a step back and improve her attitude.”         “Good advice,” Card said, “But there’s something you’re not telling me. What is it?”         “Well... Pinkie seemed pretty off, like she was confused and kind of upset. I put it down to her feeling left out, but looking back I’m not so sure.” Twilight admitted.         “Was she doing anything strange?” Card pressed with a suddenly serious look on his face.         “Well, she did keep on looking at me, and then glancing away. It also seemed like her hair was a little flatter than usual.” Twilight said as she tried to remember the events in more detail. Card took on an even more distracted look, and seemed to be in deep thought. Twilight heard him mutter. “So, I was right.” At this Twilight got confused. Right about what? she wondered. She decided to voice her confusion only to get a startled look from Card and him saying,         “Nothing. It just turns out that I’ve got something to take care of soon.” Twilight’s curiosity was peaked, but she said nothing, instead choosing to focus on finishing her sandwich.         When the meal was over, Twilight noticed something as she got her bits out to pay. “Uh, Card. You have some ketchup on your chest.”         “Oh?” Card swiped his hoof against the stain and then smelled it, before shaking his head, “Nah, that’s not ketchup.”         “Well what is it then?” Twilight asked.         “It’s blood.” Card said as he dabbed at it with a napkin, completely oblivious to Twilight’s look of shock.         “Blood?” she asked, “Where from?”         “Well, it’s from just about ten minutes before you arrived.” Card said as he rubbed against the stain all the more vigorously. “Come on,” He muttered, “Go away.”         Twilight, meanwhile, just got an even more shocked look on her face. “How?” she asked. The stain seemed to have no intention of allowing itself to be driven off easily so Card gave a sigh of defeat and put the napkin down, turning his full attention back to Twilight.         “Sorry, I didn’t catch that. What did you say?”         Twilight gulped and said, “I asked you how you got a bloodstain on your chest in the short time I was talking to Pinkie.”         “Oh.” Card said. “Well, that’s an interesting little story.” -----Flashback Time!-----         While I was sitting here and waiting for you, I saw a griffon flying across the sky. I thought nothing of it until she touched down in front of the cafe with an expression suggesting she had either just been eaten out, or had robbed a little old mare.         “Wait what?” Twilight interrupted.         “The expressions are very similar. Try doing both sometime and look at your face in the mirror after each,” Card said. “Anyways, where was I? Oh yeah.”         After a brief glance around the front of the cafe, she saw that all the other tables were full and so she approached me. As I opened my mouth to offer her one of the chairs, she said ‘Get out of that chair nerd.’ Naturally I was bothered by this and so I, in the politest way I could think of mind you, asked her to leave.         ‘Bug off.’         “... Why are you looking at me like that?”          Despite my asking her to leave so nicely, she acted insulted and responded with, ‘Excuuuse me, bookworm. What did you just say to me?’ She got all up in my face too, about 3 inches away. After pushing her face away from me, I repeated my request although this time I did explain why I didn’t want to leave.         ‘I said, bug off, featherbrain. I’m saving this table for a friend.’         She responded with, ‘I’m not asking, I’m telling. Get out of that seat. NOW.’ We went back and forth like this for a good while, until finally I got fed up with it. I returned my full attention to my book, after informing her that I would not deal with her any longer.         ‘Look, if you don’t fuck off by the time I count to three, I will punch you.’ She just scoffed, then shoved her face into mine and her talon at my chest.         ‘Hah. I’d like to see you try’ she said, in what she probably thought was an intimidating tone. I started counting down.         ‘1’ She just flared out her wings and and came even closer.         ‘2’ I said as I marked off my place in my book and closed it.         ‘3’ She still didn’t leave, and as she opened her mouth         ‘I kn-’ I drove my hoof into the bottom of her beak. That apparently gave her a nose bleed, and the blood from that must have landed on me.’ -----Flashback Time Over!!!-----         “...”         “...”         “...”         “Twinkly, if you leave you mouth open like that you’re going to let flies in.” Card said.         “... You-” Twilight said with disbelief, “You hit a- a- a-,” Wait, what do you call a female griffon? Oh well. “A female!?!”         “Yes,” Card said. “I did warn her first, and she was being a bitch. I didn’t even tell you about all the things she called me.”         “You still hit a female!” Twilight said indignantly.         “Not hard enough to do any lasting damage, don’t worry,” Card said as he tried to placate Twilight. “I have pretty good control over my strength, and her nose had stopped bleeding by the time she flew away with her tail between her legs.”         “But- you’re not supposed to hit females!”         “Why not?” Card asked. “When it comes to facing consequences, why would someone deserve to get off easy due to something completely out of their control?”         “Well... Well...” Twilight struggled to come up with an answer. “Because- Well you should-” She sighed. “I’ll get back to you on that.”         “Please do.” Card then got out his wallet and threw some bits down on the table as he said, “Look, I have to get going. Please think some more about this, I would like to hear your opinions.” Card then turned around and left, leaving behind a unicorn in deep thought. At least she was in deep thought, until Pinkie found her.         “Twilight!” Pinkie yelled, causing Twilight to nearly fall over at being yanked out of her thoughts so quickly. As she recovered herself, Pinkie began telling her about her plan to throw a party for Rainbow Dash’s friend.         “And then she’ll feel so happy about it, that all of her grumpiness will melt away!” Pinkie finished. “What do you think Twilight?”         “Huh?” Twilight said having finally regained her balance. “Oh, yeah. That’ll definitely work.” Maybe I should ask Princess Celestia what she thinks about it?         “Great! Let’s go!” Pinkie then grabbed Twilight by the hoof and started to drag her to the S.C.C. Damnit, that hoof just stopped feeling sore! -----Later that day, after the party was done-----         Mr. Cake sighed as he looked over the mess that was left in his bakery after Pinkie’s most recent party, which had just ended. For all that he loved Pinkie, he wished that she would keep the mess down to a minimum. But hey, at least she helped in the clean up. Currently she was aiding his dear wife with all the dishes she had gotten dirty. With another sigh he got ready to clean up the room, deciding to start with the icing stain on the ceiling. How does she get those up there? he thought as he set up the ladder and got a mop, but before work could actually start, he heard a knock at the door. Did I forget to turn the sign to closed again? He let out yet another sigh as he prepared himself for the look of disappointment he would get from the customer he would have to turn away. He opened the door and said “Sorry, we’re closed for the evening.”         “Oh, that’s ok, I’m not here as a customer.”         Mr. Cake took on a shocked expression, which only deepened, along with a narrowing of his eyes, as he realized who was standing at his doorstep.         “I would like to talk to you about Pie,” said Card. “May I come in?”