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// Part 8: The Talk... 
// Story: They Grow Up... 
// by overlord-flinx 
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	The relationship between offspring and parent is... complicated. No matter what sort of relationship you believe you have with your parents or your kids, to someone it looks complicated or feels like it. Parents are never the same, really. Some parents are 'hard' while some are 'soft'. The same goes for the children. But, at the same time, your 'parent' might not be the one that gave you birth. At the same time, your 'child' might not be someone you're related to. In that way, the relationship can always get so easily complicated.





"By the way..." Disarm swept a foreleg around Pip's neck and leaned himself in, trying to look as casual as could be, "we were on the topic of the filly you're thinking of fooling?"

Blatant disregard for strategic planning! Alas, results are the goal nonetheless... Crystal let loose a pent sigh, still recovering from the loss of her greatest piece. Pip looked away from his goat friend, the flesh of his face tinting an embarrassed red. "R-Right. I was talking on that. Well... L-Listen... Do either of you remember when your parents gave you the talk?"

Under their disguises, Chrysalis and Discord were momentarily confused. The talk? What was the talk, and how did that relate to what they were talking about?

The talk? Perhaps the birds and the bees? Yes, that would be most logical in this moment... And I have had that talk with Pip when he was much younger. A very uneasy talk, but I believe the point was made. Crystal's dark head bowed and she gave a subtle laugh. "But of course. My mother was smart and gave me the talk when I was but a filly."

Talk, huh? Put in the shtick that Pip is never saying what you think he's saying... Hmmm. OH! THE TALK! WE NEVER-- Disarm's facial tone dropped and he moved off from Pip, his eyes searching about a little. "The talk? Heh, no. No my parents never talked to me about it..." Swiftly, the goat put his foreleg around the neck of Crystal and pulled her a bit in one direction away from Pip, "Excuse the two of us... We've gotta chit-chat for a sec."

Crystal shot a harsh glare to Disarm, a green flame hinting in the depths of her eyes. "Whatever it is, we can talk about--"

"We'll be right ba-a-a-a-ack!" Disarm didn't allow Crystal to say any more as she was yanked into a nearby alley.

Left behind, Pip blinked once before mustering a common smile he wore. "Be waiting 'ere," he called to them as he took a seat by the fountain. The talk... Wonder what mum and dad would tell me? Mum would probably say: 'Son, girls are for one thing--' than go on about food they give 'er. Dad would say... No idea what dad would say.





One time or another, 'the talk' comes up. No, not the sex talk; that talk is just a minefield that comes and goes in an hour to three weeks of questions and awkward looks. The real talk is the talk about dating. A lot would say that the date talk is nothing and only leads to the sex talk. But, those people aren't parents. That talk is the base of everything else and is the roof of everything that comes after. Why? Because, for a parent, it is the first sign that they won't need you any more. Some parents never go through the talk and just worry about who their child is dating or going after. There's nothing wrong with that... But, there are some kids that want to know if they have a tie to their parents or not.





Muck coated every nook and cranny of Diamond Tiara's coat, mane, and bent tiara as she pushed on through the streets of Ponyville. She lost track of how long it took her to force a hole out of that sewage system she was dropped into, and frankly didn't want to think back to it. The young mare's body dripped with the horrible stench and grime that the waste of Ponyville had to offer; drawing countless stares and gags from ponies she passed. When she finally reached her house, a home that was vastly more well constructed than any neighboring houses, she bucked the front door open and stormed in with squishing hooves. The sound of the door slamming behind her brought her father's attention away from the paper he had on the dining room table and towards his daughter. "Sweetie-pie! Home al--SWEET CELESTIA!" Filthy Rich brazened his hooves against the newspaper before him after he caught sight of his daughter, and smell not long after.

Diamond Tiara, who would normally skip with joy to see her 'daddy' continued to gripe with a gnashing of teeth in her closed mouth. "I... Have had... A long... Day, daddy. Your princess was dropped in the sewer -which she had no idea was even under Ponyville- and had to walk all the way here dripping with this--ew..." her father was listening closely, despite how much his expression showed that the smell was cutting at him, "...Where's mom? I have to ask her something..."

"She's in her office fixing up some new pla--Celestia, go take a bath!"

"DADDY!"

"I'm sorry princess! But it smells horrible!" Rich had to force himself out of the room and away from his daughter, the smell becoming to overwhelming.

Diamond Tiara huffed a little and started up the stairs, continuing to gripe over the situation with each step she went up. She was down... But this wasn't about to stop her. At the top of the stairs, she looked at the doors lining the hallway. 'Diamond Tiara's Room', 'Office', 'Bathroom (with shower)', and 'ןןɐqʍǝɹɔs'... She wasn't about to take a shower, not until she got some answers. While Filthy Rich was a wonderful dad and supportive to a fault, it was her mom she would go to in a case like this. Slowly, Diamond Tiara pushed the door open and poked her grime encased face into the office space. "Mommy? Can we talk?"

Before even another word, the door swung open with a firm hold of a pink aura taking it, making Diamond Tiara stumble forward towards the floor; though the same force had caught her before she could even graze the floor. As she was airlifted more into the office, a smooth laugh came from a slender white mare looking over some papers on a desk. "My sweet Tiara..." the mare whipped the papers off of the desk and turned a look over her shoulder, fairly unaffected by her daughter's appearance, "Mommy always has time to talk!" Diamond Tiara was slowly lowered the the ground, all her grime flashing off of her and being set into a large ball that was put into a trash can nearby with the hold of the pink aura; though the scent still hung on Diamond Tiara's body. "So... Dish."

"Well... Mommy..." Diamond Tiara brushed her hoof against her tiara, trying to reset it on top of her head with little success, "...Is any boy worth this?"

At first, Fleur de Lis only offered a warm smile as she too folded her legs in and sat against the office floor with her daughter. "Really? If it was me? No way...!" she laughed at her own words before she settled herself, "But, any boy worth a bit is worth at least a little trouble." the mare winked at Diamond Tiara, bringing out a plotting smirk to her.

"Riiight... I've got it..."

"That's the kind of thinking I had when I met your father... And your father is worth -a lot- of bits. Not as much as your uncle, but..."





Within the depths of Silver Spoon's home, she sneaked her way through the spanning halls after escaping dinner with her mother. Love her to death though she did, she didn't rely on her for advice. For the advice she needed, she would have to ask someone a bit more... restrained. Luckily, she knew just where to find one. Deep within her home, she found her father's personal study with the door left partly open. Silver Spoon put a hoof to her mouth and gave a clear of her throat, trying to draw attention as she stood in the door frame. "Dad? Do you have a second?" From the corner of her eye, she could see her observant father tending away to some 'last minute affairs' as he put them on hangers.

Without his shades covering his eyes, Silver Spoon saw exactly when Hoity Toity looked to her and brimmed over with a joyful smile. "Silvy!" the stallion darted over to the young mare and brought her into a firm but short hug, "How are you? Ah! A second? No, no! You have me for hours! Come, come...!" Silver Spoon was whisked deeper into the study and brought to sit down on a velvet throw-pillow beside her dad, "Tell me what you want, Silvy. Don't be shy for a moment!"

Finally... A helpful hoof. Silver Spoon sighed a relief as she adjusted herself against the pillow. "Dad...? What do you do when you like a boy?"

"Ohhh... I'm to assume your mother wasn't any help?"

"Not if I'm going to do it in this era..."

"In that case, honey, I only have one thing to tell you. When you like somepony, you just have to throw yourself in and lay down the truth. You do remember my--"

Silver Spoon put a hoof up into the air as if reading from an invisible book, "Toity Rule One: if you have something nice to say, say it. If you have something rude to say, say it. But only say it if it's true."

"That's my girl!"





"What are you trying to say?"

"We bucked up! We -so- bucked up!"

"Calm yourself, whelp! If what you believe is to be true, we may yet be able to selvage this..."

"How? Even I can't think a way out of this."

"This won't be the first time I had to do all the lifting for us. Regardless! We must be counteractive in a sense... We have to find the boy a 'mate' that he can practice talking to."

"...Why don't--?"

"If you even suggest it, I will rip out your larynx. Even I have a basis of disguise I will not cross..."

"Oh alright. In that case, we'll need to find somepony that can pull off being--" within the alley the goat and mare spoke freely within, Disarm's eyes locked onto a passing sight.

"What are you looking--?" following his gaze, Crystal too saw the sight and her heart fell like a stone. Makers, what is that homely creature? It is beyond uninviting by all traces of the word!

Makers, who is that? She's... She's... PERFECT!





The young mare watched as the two young ponies she was put in charge of circled around her while they walked down the street. She would have told them to stop, had it not been for the bag of freshly baked goods locked in her mouth. Even more of a problem was what the two kept harping her about. "So, Pumpkin... Let me get this straight on you," Pound Cake cued his sister, "She doesn't have a date for Hearts and Hooves day..."

"Nope!" the little unicorn skipped under the gate of Twist's legs,sending a shiver through the older mare.

"Aaaand, she made extras for her date?"

"That's what she said~~!"

"Sooo, she's gonna ask the dude out?"

"Nope! She's to scared~~." The two continued to jostle their guardian more and more, shifting around her while she lowered her head in embarrassment.

I-I'll ask him... I will.. I just need to talk to somepony about it first...





The two observers watched the young mare pass by, continuing to see her being pestered by the rowdy younger ponies. "Queeny... I think I have an idea..." Discord hissed mischievously as his eyes narrowed.

"Oh... Joy..."