//------------------------------// // An Ancient Tale // Story: The Secret of Smarty Pants // by Rough_Draft //------------------------------// Two – An Ancient Tale It wasn’t easy to get everypony onto the chariot—even with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy flying them instead of the royal guards—but they managed to get to Canterlot in record time. Twilight found herself a little embarrassed to have to fly out of town in such an auspicious way, but she was grateful to have friends to help her out. Rainbow Dash wasted no time in landing them right outside the royal palace. She paused long enough to let Twilight fly ahead of her and Fluttershy, then led the others after her. When they entered the audience chamber, Princess Celestia was already waiting with her sister Luna. They offered a salute with their wings to Twilight, who nearly tripped over herself when she came to a halt. It was a little unnerving to realize that she was their peer now. “Your Highness,” Twilight said as she bowed. “I’ve brought my friends and the Elements of Harmony as requested.” Celestia smiled. “Very good, Twilight. And did you remember to bring your doll?” “Uh, yes.” Twilight blushed when she heard Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash snickering behind her, but she summoned Smarty Pants out from Applejack’s saddlebag. Rarity had managed to stitch the doll up to make it presentable, though the stuffing near the watch remained exposed. “I realize that it might seem like a strange thing, but there’s more to that watch than you realize,” said Celestia. She nodded at Luna. “Do you remember how my sister and I used the Elements of Harmony to dispel enemies of Equestria like Discord and King Sombra?” “I do.” “Long ago, when Discord was imprisoned, we used the Elements of Harmony to drive off the wendigos and other malicious creatures that ran wild.” As Celestia spoke, the air in the audience chamber swirled, creating an illusion of the times she described. Twilight and her friends saw the two alicorns flying over Equestria, as wendigos and dragons fled in terror. A cold and barren landscape turned bright and sunny. “But back when the Crystal Empire was formed, there were more than six Elements of Harmony,” Celestia continued. “Besides the six you all wield, there were two others.” A crystalline blue heart appeared in the air. Twilight recognized it as the Crystal Heart that she and Spike had saved from the returning King Sombra. Beside that was the mysterious pocket watch. Emblazoned on its case was a magnificent shield. “These are the Elements of Love and Patience. They were both lost when the Crystal Empire disappeared, though it did not break the power of the remaining six as you well know.” “But the Element of Love did return,” Princess Luna added, “when the Crystal Empire reappeared. After the Crystal Heart was found, the Element of Love was reformed and given to Princess Cadance for safekeeping. It now sits in the throne room of the Crystal Palace, bringing hope to every pony who visits there.” “Well, that’s all well an’ good,” Applejack interrupted, “but how the hay did this pocket watch end up inside this here doll?” Celestia and Luna exchanged a worried glance. “To be perfectly honest,” said Celestia, “we don’t know, though we suspect who might have been responsible.” “And who’s that?” asked Twilight, adjusting her crown in anticipation. A burst of light and smoke went off right over Twilight’s head. She ducked as a tall and motley creature appeared between her and the royal sisters. “That,” said Discord with a courteous bow, “would be moi.” Behind her, Fluttershy landed with a cheerful expression. “Hello! It’s so nice to see you again!” “Ah, my dear Fluttershy, lovely to see you!” The draconequus bowed again. “And the same to all you ponies. And of course, Princess Twilight Sparkle, it is a pleasure and an honor. You know, I always thought you were the one best suited to rule.” “Discord, we discussed this,” Celestia chided. “Her royal status doesn’t work that way.” The trickster disappeared in a flash, reappearing beside the alicorn on her dais. “Yes, of course, Your Highness. I do understand the difference. After all, I practically invented royalty.” “Now what’s this about you and the pocket watch?” Twilight asked. When Discord turned to her, he wore an expression of mock-horror. “Oh, really. ‘Pocket watch’?” He reappeared beside Twilight, taking Smarty Pants in his hand. “This is the Element of Patience, my dear princess. And it ended up inside your doll because I put it there.” “You?!” the six ponies exclaimed. “B-but you were encased in stone!” Rarity objected. “Oh, this was before then.” Discord stretched himself out with a groan. “Aargh. Just thinking about that makes me ache. Anyway, when King Sombra took over the Crystal Empire, he hid the Element of Love. And when I ruled Equestria with the power of chaos, I made sure that nopony could find the Element of Patience.” He shrugged with a terrible grin. “So I buried it inside a cotton field in the south.” “A cotton field?” Twilight frowned and considered his words. “So that means it was harvested for the cotton that Cadance used… to make Smarty Pants.” “I know!” Discord snapped his fingers, causing Smarty Pants to suddenly kick its legs and wave its arms in a crude dance. “But tell me that’s not hilarious. One of the most powerful artifacts in all of Equestria, buried inside a filly’s doll!” Pinkie Pie was already bouncing up and down with joy. “It totally is!” “Pinkie! Stay focused!” “Sorry, Twilight—oops! I mean, sorry, Princess Twilight!” Celestia cleared her throat. “So, you see, Twilight, it’s imperative that we find a way to unlock the Element of Patience and deliver it to its rightful bearer. Just as each of you bears your own Element, and Cadance bears the Element of Love, there is only one pony who can wield it.” “And who is that?” “That would be Shining Armor.” Twilight gaped. “My brother?” “Well, I guess that makes sense,” said Rainbow Dash. She hovered beside Twilight. “I mean, you’ve gotta be patient to make it into the Royal Guard.” “Indeed,” Celestia replied. “It was for that reason, along with his love and commitment to others, that I chose him to be Captain of the Guard.” “Whatever,” Discord remarked. He was in the middle of doing a tap dance routine across the audience chamber. The still-animated Smarty Pants doll was dancing alongside him, now sporting its own tap shoes. “Patience is overrated.” Twilight looked back at her friends, then over at Celestia. “In that case, we need to go to the Crystal Empire.” “I’ve already informed Cadance and Shining Armor.” Celestia and Luna smiled and lifted their hooves. “They look forward to your arrival.” “Oh, please.” Rarity tugged at her mane. “Any chance to see more of the Crystal Ponies is well worth the effort!” “Crystal Ponies,” Discord said with a snort. His body suddenly turned crystalline. Then he produced a hammer and smashed himself to pieces. “How predictable! How boring!” “And yet,” said Luna, “I believe that your journey will be anything but boring, my dear ponies.” As Princess Twilight Sparkle and her entourage of friends left the audience chamber, it was time for the rotation of the royal guard. Cold Courage and his partner Black Storm left their posts outside the throne room as their replacements arrived. “I don’t care if he’s a court advisor,” Black Storm was saying. “That Discord gives me the creeps.” “Tell me about it,” Cold Courage replied. He turned when he saw the six ponies exit the main corridor of the palace. “Hey, I have to take off. I made a promise to visit my sister. I’ll meet you at Donut Joe’s later, all right?” “Sure thing, buddy.” They bumped their hooves together and Black Storm trotted off. Cold Courage spread his wings and flew from the nearest balcony. He soared away from the palace and toward a distant corner of Canterlot, far from the beautiful towers and well-kept public roads. In a neighborhood called Bad Horse Lane, the stallion come to a landing. Here, everything was dark and gritty. Celestia’s sun hardly touched this place. Nothing but dust and rats on broken cobblestone roads. He quickly trotted past the empty storefronts and run-down houses. Behind one of those houses was a courtyard with a dried-up fountain. Cold Courage found a white pegasus with matted gray hair and red eyes sitting beside the fount. She was staring pensively, barely noticing his approach. “My queen,” he hissed and knelt in front of her. “I bring tidings from the royal court.” The pegasus smiled and stood. Her coat rippled with a sickly green light, turning black and hard like an insect’s carapace. Her eyes became green and cold. And as she tossed back her mane, a jagged horn emerged from her forehead. The mare’s stance became regal and proud. “Excellent work, my servant,” Queen Chrysalis declared. “I can’t wait to hear all about it.”