Jacqueline and I entered the costume room, whereupon she turned around and said, "Now take off your clothes."
I wish I was joking. She didn't even shut the door! What was wrong with this girl, did she have no sense of propriety? Pinkie was laughing at my discomfort in the back of my head, which only made the whole thing worse. Oh, and then part of my brain realized that this was a not unattractive woman with a thing for ponies and that clicked with the whole "think of sex" part of my head and GRAAAAAAAGH DISCORD I THINK OF HER AS A FRIEND DANGIT!
"What, just like that?"
"Why, what's wrong?"
I took a moment to close the door, before turning around and fidgeting. "I mean... just like that? Are you sure? I, uh, I just--"
She raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me you're body shy. This isn't your body, and Pinkie's gone nude all her life!"
"Look, I'm just a little...." I shrugged. "I mean..."
"How did you ever survive the high school locker rooms?"
"By never actually needing them."
"You never... How is that possible? Every school has some physical education!"
"Bowling and tennis."
Jackie threw her hands up, giving the ceiling an exasperated look. "Listen, we're not going to get to the whole "calm everyone down by Trick or Treating" thing if you're not going to get painted. So get over your little qualms and get into the bathroom, I'm not painting you out here over the carpet!"
"It's not a little qualm, it's a deep-seated social more involving my identity and self-respect!"
"No. We are not having this conversation. I stayed up all night sewing costumes for all the other ponies--who, by the way, are totally fine showing off their flanks--and I even whipped up an extra for your brother without any warning. I said I'd get this job done, and I'm going to do it, so TAKE OFF your FUCKING CLOTHES before I TEAR THEM OFF YOU!"
There are many kinds of fear. There's the kind of fear that comes when a wild animal is charging at you. There's the kind that comes when you hear your friend is in the hospital. There's the kind when you look at the bills and realize that something's not adding up. Or when you find illicit drugs at a friend's house, or when you realize the world could very well end, or the fear you feel when a character in a book you're reading is at a crossroads....
And then there's the kind of fear that comes from dealing with a sleep-deprived cosplayer. It's a mix of 'are you serious?' and 'I feel such shame' spiced up with 'sweet God in heaven I think she's going to kill me.' Actually a very invigorating blend, if you ask me.
I took a moment to uncurl from my position on the floor.
"...can... can you at least, um, not watch me?"
Jackie sighed, rubbing her forehead and walking into the bathroom. "Fine. Whatever." She shut the door behind her, leaving me alone to... um... strip.
Yes, I know it sounds weird! I just don't like people seeing me strip! It's... a thing!
Pinkie took the moment to speak up in the back of my head. Do you want me to take control for this? I mean, if it would be more comfortable for you to just sit it out I'm totally cool with it.
...if you think you can hold still for it...
Oh, well that could be a problem. I'm not very good at the holding still thing, I mean I try but there's always so much to do and--
Alright I get it! I sighed. I guess I should do this anyway... I'm the one that picked Midna.
Carefully, I hung my clothes on a hanger that Jackie had thoughtfully provided, double checking to make sure nothing fell out of my coat pockets. I took a deep breath, steeling myself for the upcoming events. The approach to the door was filled with trepidation and terror. My hoof reached up to the door handle, eyes clenching shut as I turned it and walked onto the tiled floor.
"...okay, seriously, you're worse then Fluttershy."
I sighed and gave Jackie an unamused look. "Let's just get this over with."
She pulled out two bottles, shaking them up. "First we'll dye your mane and tail. Normally I'd do makeup first, but with this outfit..." With a shrug, she reached out and gathered my mane up.
I don't know if I mentioned this, but I really hate hair gel; the feeling of WET CLING in your hair is just aggravating. It was on that day I learned that hair dye is a lot similar.
It was also on that day I learned just how SENSITIVE a pony's tail can be.
And, come to think of it, the feeling of having white paint literally dumped all over me.
And having bits of stiff fabric spirit gummed to my head and neck.
The whole mane and tail in plastic thing wasn't new though. And being painted black wasn't exactly new either, though paintbrushes in places other then my face presented some problems.
"EEEP!"
I couldn't help but jump a bit as the brush went up my leg, earning a glower from the cosplayer.
"Jackie!" Linda called from the other side of the door. "Don't feel him up, that's lesbianism and arguably bestiality!" Apparently she had just entered the costume room for some reason. Probably to get her costume.
"You have a problem with those?" Jackie replied as she continued to darken my flank.
"No on the gay, maybe on the animal! Does it count if we can think?"
"I am not touching that issue, not even for fun. I really don't want to think about it." Oh great, Julien was there too? Well whoop de doo.
"Well, somebody has to," Linda pointed out. "Whole new world and all that."
I rolled my eyes at that comment. "It's been touched on in loads of fics, a few of mine included. Multispecies is generally considered fine if both parties are consenting. Heck, I've even heard of YEEEEP!"
"I know it tickles, just hold still!" Jackie growled.
"Trying!" I took a breath, watching as she switched out the large brush fro a smaller one and dipped it into bluegreen paint. "Anyway, like I was saying, I even heard about a woman who married a dolphin... somewhere. Dunno where, but, you know... dolphins."
"I suppose but it just seems... Like someone could have a relationship based on physical state more than a deep connection that way." Oh, apparently Erishy was out there too...
"Well, as long as they are consenting, I don't see anything wrong with it," Julien commented. "But I don't think Reid is consenting to anything in there."
"Excuse me, this is fully consenting," I snipped. "I have worn makeup before."
"Really?" The cosplayer painting me seemed surprised.
"Yeah, back in high school. Theater. I wasn't EEEE!" I twitched as the brush danced over my ear. "I wasn't on the stage, but I was handing out tickets. My job was to say 'Pleasant dreams' in this really creepy, monotone voice, and the makeup plus the red robe and hat made EEEHEEEHEE THAT TICKLES!"
Jackie groaned, pulling her brush back from my shoulder. "I know, I know, just hold STILL!"
"I am trying, really!" I reassured her quickly. "Anyway, so there I was with a white mimeface, red robes, red hat, staring at everyone passing by and wishing them Pleasant Dreams ominously.... and of course the play was Actor's Nightmare."
That got a giggle out of the yellow pegasus outside.
"Wow, Erishy, that certainly looks fetching on you!" Linda said suddenly, in that sort of voice you would only expect from those television shows like "What not to wear" and "Clean House." Okay, so I liked Clean House. The later seasons anyway. They had good editing!
"Why thank you!" the pegasus giggled. "I really like it, Jackie did such a great job, and I can't wait to see how she does my feathers. And the lace, I always thought lace was scratchy but she found some that is soft, imagine that!"
"Yeah, Jackie's always been great with finding soft things."
I swore I heard some sort of squeak before two sets of hooves walked out of the room.
Jackie rolled her eyes. "Now just hold out your ankle, and I'll paint this final symbol...."
"Okay." I sheepishly lifted a leg. "Sorry for being so twitchy, it's... just that I'm pretty sensitive. Sensitive skin."
"And..... done." She nodded and stood, opening a cabinet and pulling out two mostly transparent hemispheres. "You can't put on the helmet and bands yet, the hair dye still needs to dry, but I can give you your contacts and teeth now."
"Wow, where did you get these things?" I stared at the contacts. "They're huge!"
"Made them myself, last night."
...okay, Jackie was officially a costume goddess. Sorry, Rares, but she did all that in one night? You've got competition.
"Open your eyes...." I tried not to flinch as the contacts went in. "Now your mouth..." And actually did flinch a bit wen the fake fang was slipped on--it was cold! "...and done! As soon as your body paint dries you can put those things on, stay in here until I tell you to!" Jackie opened the door, walking out of my sight. "So, before I dye your feathers... are there any safety tips?"
"As long as it is water soluble, just don't pull them out." Erishy giggled a tad nervously.
"Alright, Could you stretch out your wings, please?"
"ARGH!" I winced and forced down the images of a yellow pegasus and her wings being... handled. "Sorry, my brain seems to be really perverse today. I am still blaming it on Dissy." Erishy giggled at my suffering.
So began the long wait for me to dry out.
"....What's happening out there? When can I come out?"
"Wait a bit!" Jackie replied. So I'm not that patient, sue me.
"I'm getting my feathers dyed," Erishy reported. "So how are you doing Reid?"
"I am covered. In. Paint," I stated flatly. "It is both disturbing and strangely relaxing."
"I can imagine, sort of... Well not really, but I understand!" the pegasus reassured me.
"Soooo, Have ya'll got mah brother painted up?" Apparently Ian decided to make an entrance at this time.
"Yes, dear," Jackie confirmed, "I'm just working on miss Erishy here while he dries out."
"...'dear?' Oh fer the love of--"
There was a vast and powerful screech, as though someone had been confronted with a terrifying reality and had subsquently lost their sanity. So, not really a big deal. It happens.
"What was that?" Erishy asked in fear.
"That sounds like..." Jackie sighed. "Oh, dear. Linda's probably just having a breakdown."
"Should we go see what's happenen'?" Ian asked hesitantly.
"No.... she probably just needed a little release. She should be okay soon."
Standing in one spot is boring. I couldn't even pace! "Am I dry yet?"
"Hold on," Jackie replied.
Erishy began to hum a very familiar tune, one from generations of plastic ponies ago. This got Ian's attention. "Where's ya learn that tune anyway? Ah mean, it's not like somebody came from Earth and started singing that thang in Equestria."
"According to one legend I heard, it was the lullaby Celestia and Luna heard every night when they were young." It took me a moment to realize the words had come out of my mouth, and I rolled my eyes once I realized what had happened. "That's... That's a Pinkie I."
"I have no idea," the pegasus added, "but I think Pinkie is right."
"I guess that makes sense," the cosplayer said casually.
After a moment, my brother spoke up again. "So, ah... Reid, are ya, ya know, still.... Reid?"
I took a breath, steadying myself. "Yes. And, um, no. Gollum Smeagol thing. We can switch out whenever we want, and talk to each other in our heads."
"Is there something keeping you two from merging?" Erishy asked.
"Merging is not the only form of synthesis," I explained wisely. "It's just one way. There are many paths."
"Ya'll have no idea, do ya."
Well, Ian knew me a bit too well. "I have too many ideas, more like." My ears perked as I heard the pegasus giggling suddenly. "Wait, what's going on out there?"
"Ah am not seein' this," Ian said flatly.
"What?" Jackie seemed oblivious to whatever was happening.
"Nothing," Erishy said way too casually. "She's just playing with my tail is all."
Instantly I was on alert. "WHAT?!" Tail-playing?! What?!
"I'm dying her tail," the cosplayer quickly reassured. "Like I dyed yours."
"Oh...." That was reassuring NO WAIT IT WASN'T AT ALL. "WHAT?!?!"
"Yah did that tah mah brother?!"
"He did ask for it, and I wasn't anything but professional. There, all done. You should be dry now, Reid."
"Hey, why are you all acting this is a big deal?" the pegasus asked. "I think that Jackie was quite professional about it."
"Well it just looks suggestive, I guess." I shrugged as I stepped out of the bathroom. "I mean when she was--"
And then I caught sight of Erishy.
"...doing... me.... It... kinda tickled...."
My voice trailed off as I looked at her in her halloween outfit. I'd gotten a preview when it was on the ponnequin, of course, but once it was placed on a living, breathing body things were completely different. The subtle slope of the green corset accentuated the elegant, striped wings, and the way her skirt clung to her flank just teased at revealing her cutie mark. The little lacy shoestocking things made me ever so aware of the graceful curve of her legs, and the strands of black in her mane and tail danced in serpentine frenzy. Somehow, the makeup didn't remove the softness of the pegasus's features, but where before it was a somewhat worried and sad softness now it was relaxed, predatory. A look found on a panther that was amused a humble deer had just spotted it lounging right above its head.
In that moment I thanked my lucky stars I was not a pegasus.
My brother took a moment to look between us before facehooving. "Oh ya have got ta be joken." Fortunately, before he could continue, Jackie snatched him up and absconded.
"Um..." Erishy blushed a bit. "Hey... You like the outfit?"
"Um... yes. Uh...." I glanced at my own painted body. "Aheh... do you like the... uh... runes?" I was trying my best not to bolt out of the room because I was COMPLETELY NAKED but the fact was my cheekbones were burning.
"Yeah!" she assured me quickly. "Very stylish. Um... Very... Are you sure you are okay with not wearing anything? I mean... You seemed so worried before.."
"I am completely naked with dry goop on my skin and alone in a room with a a mare I may or may not have romantic feelings for who is wearing what is quite frankly a very alluring outfit while still coming to terms with the fact that I am a mare myself and on top of all that Discord has seen it fit to make me think of sex constantly. Not become aroused by it, just think of it. So no, I am not comfortable, but really I took this path and I'll stick to it."
My name is Reid and I am charmingly blunt.
I took the moment of confusion to lunge for the styrofoam helmet and ponytail holders, slipping my mane and tail through the rings before sliding the big bulky fused shadow replica onto my head. Instantly I relaxed; the part of me that was an actor found Midna and brought her to the forefront of my mind, where she cackled at my own awkwardness.
Hmmm. First Pinkie, then the Discord fragment, and now Midna. I briefly considered charging rent before realizing that none of my guests would be able to provide legal tender.
"....believe it or not, wearing this makes me feel a lot better," I admitted, letting out a breath.
"I...." Erishy glanced around, still trying to process what I had said. "Um.... I.... Well.... Thank you?"
"You're welcome. And thank you for only noticing the compliment in that."
I turned, ready to leave the room.
Then I whirled about, facehooving. "FLUTTERSHY! Of course, FLUTTERSHY, why didn't I see it before? I am such an idiot."
"You're doing that Pinkie thing again, where you get excited without explaining it to others." The pegasus raised an eyebrow.
"What happens in Las Pegasus STAYS in Las Pegasus. And Fluttershy is a Las Pegasus name, good and soft, not like the Cloudsdale pegasi. Rainbow Dash, Spitfire, I heard Spitfire named her kid Lightning dust.... ACTION names, lots of oomph. The ancient pegasi were militaristic, but not idiots, they divided everything up! Soldiers, craftsmen, bakers, all with names describing their actions! Hurricane names his daughter Pansy so she can stay at home gardening, overprotective from the moment she's born HA! Fast forward to the farming settlement on the west coast, lots of soft names related to gardening even after it's no longer a garden town, and guess what? Fluttershy! That...."
Suddenly I realized what I had been rambling on about, and slowed down.
"That's.... probably why you were left at the orphanage. Because you... weren't born from.... real love."
Why had I even brought this up?!
Erishy looked at me in complete shock.
What the heck was I thinking to bring this up?!?!
I took the first move, stepping forward and clutching her tightly. "I shouldn't have mentioned it. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry..." After a moment, she collapsed and started sobbing, bringing her own forelegs around my neck. Suddenly I felt a burning weight around my neck; I knew if I glanced down, I would see a vengeful element of harmony glowing as it reprimanded me. "I.... I'm such an idiot. Um...." My hooves ran through her mane as I desperately wracked my head for some idea to cheer her up. "Bright side, bright side... M-Maybe you're, um, Rainbow Dash's half sister? That could be a good thing, right? O--o-or maybe your father was visiting from Neighpon, a-a-and you're the long lost princess of, I don't know, Neighpon's number one, um, rabbit... place.... They have rabbits, right? I should just shut up."
"B... Bright side.... I don't have to be alone anymore. It wasn't my f.... f.... fault...." Erishy tried and failed to stop the tears.
"Hey." I pulled back, looking into her eyes firmly. "You are never alone. Got that? I don't care about where you came from or where you're going, I care about where you are right here, right now. And right now, I swear to you with the power invested in me as Pinkimena Diane Pie: You are never alone." My hooves crossed my chest, waggled in the air and then--
It was that point I realized just how fuzzy my eyelids were.
The ridiculous gesture, though, managed to calm Erishy down. She wrapped her forelegs around me again, but this time she was smiling faintly. "Thank you. Both of you."
The pain from my magic bling faded away.
"....you know what we need? We need to show off our costumes to the world!" I released Erishy and quickly tossed the Element of Laughter into a corner, hoping over to the door. Being the chivalrous man that I am, I bowed and held the door own for her; she rolled her eyes and gave me a little curtsy as she exited. It was a matter of no time at all before we spotted Jackie and Ian talking about... something down the hall. "Hey! Jackie! Before we head outside, Erishy and I want to give the world a little preview of our AMAZING outfits. Can you help us with that?"
The cosplayer smirked. "Of course! I wouldn't be Photo Finish without..." She produced a magnificent piece of work with a floruish. "A Photo Camera! Smile for facebook, ladies!"
....what just... I couldn't... huh?
"...aaaaaaum. Ahem." I took a moment to clear my head.
"Well, I'll just post this to--"
"NO!" The cosplayer was interrupted by my panicked flailing. "No, um, shippers! Shipping wars are legendary. Don't tease the shippers." I grinned, awkwardly realizing that I was maybe overreacting a tad. "Let's... take another photo."
"...Ya haven't been kissed before, have ya."
"No. No I have not. This is a reaction to my first kiss, and therefore cannot be analyzed for definitive emotional content." Plus this way Mom wouldn't find out before I told her. That was always good, right?
Erishy giggled at my antics. "You are so funny."
"I'll just take that as a compliment.," I quipped dryly, as we smiled for a more official image.