You want to know about my life?
I recall your asking of a similar question some time ago, thinking back to my time in Ponyville. What did I say back then?
...
Really?
Wow, that seems like millennia ago...
Sorry, I drifted off for a moment. Old memories, nostalgic feelings, et cetera.
A lot has changed since then, to say the least. I’m certainly not the same pony that used to live in the library. I guess, at my core, I still hold the same values and beliefs as I did back then; friends are the most valuable things in the world, and you should never forget them. A true, true friend will always be there when you need them, with no exceptions, and that’s still true for me. However, that’s really the only vestige I’ve managed to retain.
I can’t even recall the last I saw of Applejack and Rarity. We exchange letters a few times a month, but that’s about it. I still love them to death, but... I haven’t said that to them in years. I will after tonight has ended, though. Enough time has passed.
I saw Fluttershy about five years ago at her wedding with Big Mac, and she was the happiest I’d ever seen her. She’s grown so much since the first time we met on the outskirts of Ponyville. To say that I’m proud of her wouldn’t even come close. I teared up quite a bit; it was like watching a sister I never had tie the knot.
Pinkie Pie finds her way back to the Castle every year or so for the Gala. Other than that, she floats between Manehatten and Las Pegasus, managing her two clubs. I’ve been meaning to see one of those things in person for a few years, I just never really find a reason to do so. Maybe tonight, after Luna’s party-thing, I’ll drag her over to one.
Rainbow Dash drops in every few months to say hello when she has time between Wonderbolt events. Being second in command of the entire squad, she must always there for her team, meaning that she has little personal time. However, I find myself growing less and less dependant on her visits as time goes on. Both Luna and I take that as a good thing.
See, after becoming an alicorn, I knew things would change, and those changes could quite possibly be negative. I was prepared for that in a way, but watching my friends grow up while I stayed a young adult hit me hard. Celestia told me after my coronation all about the effects on the body that my ascendance brought with it, namely the decelerated aging. I understand that the general populace believes me to be a goddess, in the same way they regard Celestia, but this is a misconception. I am not immortal like herself and Luna, but I will certainly be attending my friend’s funerals.
Sorry, that was darker than I intended it to be. It’s not that being royalty is all bad, I just... Sometimes I think that I would have been better off staying a unicorn. Having Celestia here with me really took the stress away, at first. She’s always been like a mother to me, and I talked to her for hours on end about my feelings and issues. She simply listened, absorbing it all, and the love I felt for her because of it couldn’t have grown any stronger. After two or so years, though, as my friends grew further and further apart, she really couldn’t help. You can only read the same book so many times before it stops being fun, and the same happened to us.
That’s what lead me to Luna, the feelings of abandonment and repetitiveness. I didn’t blame my friends for growing up – how could I? – but that didn’t make the fact that they were slowly drifting away any easier to deal with. So, when Luna started showing, er... interest, in me, I couldn’t think of anypony else that could help like she could. I’d sort of had a thing for her since Nightmare Night, and the feelings were apparently mutual. When I found out, between our emotions, my friends, and the loneliness, I just threw myself at her. She became my only real source of life in my panic, and looking back on it after seven years, that was unhealthy and unjustifiable of me.
She’s giving me a cross look from the window right now. I know she was more than happy to be there for me, and she gladly took my pain, but it was still wrong to heap it onto her. We both agree that I’ve gotten much better, though. Books now hold the same joy that they once did. Reports on crop counts and five-hundred page tax forms aren’t the bane of my existence anymore. I’m even starting to get into the ‘nightlife’ of Equestria’s cities, though it’s mostly against my will.
Speaking of which, I promised her I would finally go to a “rave” tonight, and she looks a little impatient. Thank you for this. I enjoyed the chance to get away from duties for a little bit, and –
AH! Luna! Put me down! I have wings too, you know...!