//------------------------------//
// Why Los Angeles can't have nice things. 
// Story: Dash and Twilight get The Munchies. 
// by Steventheman 
//------------------------------//

"But how?! I thought Optimus Prime banished you to Hel after you split Africa into ten pieces!" Dash said. She prepared herself to fight Kefka.
"No no, my little ponies. Optimus merely continued the fight down there. He, Kurt Cobain and the insufferable Doomguy. But in a way, I like Doomguy. We're so alike! We both want to kill things!"
"So what? If you're here to try that shit again, then I'll beat you myself!" Dash said. "The world doesn't need people like you!"

Kefka cackled. "You don't understand. Even when I am this...weak form, I can still play!" Kefka said. "You are merely two ponies, from a little land called Equestria, off the American West Coast."
"And if you even think about going there, I'll take you on!" Twilight said.
"Why should I? I wasn't even thinking about it until you said so!"
"Shit."
"Yes, shit indeed. But you know what? I hear that Bro Strider is in Los Angeles. I'm not one for petty revenge games, you know, but he's been such a pain in my backside! Him and his stupid brother!"
"What?!" Dash cried.
"Oh yes, that's where your little Skaian heroes went. Straight to Hel. To fight me." Kefka giggled. "Are you really that scared of little old me? That you send heroes to Hel to fight me? How flattering!" Kefka looked up. "Anyway, I must be off to LA now. Celebrities can't kill themselves! Well, Kurt Cobain is the exception."

Kefka disappeared in a flash. Dash and Twilight looked at each other in shock.

"Can we just conclude that Los Angeles is fucked and get on with our lives?" Twilight asked.





"Fuckbuckling piece of shit!" the Changeling Queen cried as she threw a DVD of The Legend Of The Titanic out of the window. "Fucking sharks and fucking octopus and fucking mice and fucking why?! A fucking whaling message?! Well, stick a fucking baguette up my ass and call me a rifle-dropping coward!"

The Queen picked her DVD player and dropped it in a basin of water. "Great. Now what the hell am I going to do?"

Chrysalis picked up a newspaper. The headline stated RETURN OF BRO STRIDER! Intrigued, Chrysalis read on, oblivious to the fire now started because of the soaking DVD player.

The mysterious Bro Strider, believed dead after the Skaia Incident, has seemingly returned to combat Metal Wolf, currently messing up Los Angeles like a drunk father messes up his kids.

Chrysalis thought about the odd comparison, before reading on.

Reader Broderick S. said on the matter: "Yo, Queen Chrysalis. You fucking owe me. Come to LA and help."

Chrysalis turned around and saw the fire, now engulfing her lounge. She calmly left the hive, before the fire hit the liquid love tanks. As the hive exploded, Chrysalis changed into the form of a normal pegasus mare, before flying upwards.





Bro Strider deflected a few of the Metal Wolf's rockets. They exploded harmlessly behind him.

"YOU'RE TOUGHER THAN I THOUGHT."
"Bitch please. This is Bro fucking Strider you're talking to. Strider is Dutch for tough."
"REALLY?"
"Yeah. Strider, or: 'To stride through things like a boss.'"
"THAT'S NOT TRUE."
"What I say is the fucking truth. Everyone on the side of awesome listens to me."

There was a flash of light. Kefka Palazzo appeared in front of Bro and Metal Wolf.

"Well...shit." Bro said, before raising his sword.





Dash looked over and saw an abandoned taco truck. "Twi! Twi! Look!" she shouted excitedly, flying over.
"What?" Twilight asked.
"Tacos!"

The two mares looked inside, only to see a rotting hobo inside the kitchen.

"Oh well. Maybe next truck..." Dash said, sadly.