I fell asleep at around 8:30. I could never remember exactly what time I fall asleep at, then again who can? I dreamt about how the ponies would react when they learned how I usually acted. When I woke up I realized that I was acting happier overall. I wasn’t trying to convince myself to commit suicide all the time, I wasn’t always looking down and sad, I was almost cheerful. Damn, these ponies happiness was contagious. But I had a reason to be here. I was going to help rarity with her fashion problem, and I had started to find Twilight had come to like having an extra set of hands around, especially when she needed something done that even she couldn’t do with her magic. Not to mention she seemed to always have a question for me, whether it be about me always wearing clothing or my favorite breakfast food. These things gave me purpose. I felt like I was finally able to help do something with my worthless life and that I could relate to some of the ponies around here. I sat up and realized exactly where I was, but it was too late.
“Mmmm, Dillon?” I realized that Twilight had offered her bed to me and I told her I would sleep on the couch. But I was in her bed. I immediately recalled to my mind what happened the night before and inwardly sighed when I found we didn’t have any fun. I didn’t know what I would do. The last thing I remember was falling asleep on the couch, so I concluded that I had sleepwalked up here and gotten in bed with twilight. But like I said, no fun had taken place. So I decided to screw around a little.
“Yea, baby?”
“What are you doing in my bed?”
I chuckled and said “I don’t know what you remember, but, last night was great.” And at that she shot to an upright position and looked at me with a fearful look. I audibly laughed “HAHAHAHA! Twi, you should see the look on your face! It’s hysterical!” and then I rolled of the bed and hit the floor with a thud, I was laughing so hard. It was only a foot fall so it didn’t hurt too badly, but it still caused her to look over the side to check on her so-called-lover, me still rolling on the floor, laughing my ass off. “Oh, hooooooooo, Twi, I'm just pulling your leg, we didn’t do anything last night, don’t worry. I sleepwalk.” I explained. I sat up and she fiercely slapped my across the face with her hoof. “Ow! Well I guess I had that coming though.”
“You are evil! You had me believe I gave my first time to another species, let alone the fact that I’ve only known you for a day!” I'm actually surprised she didn’t cuss me out.
“Sorry, but I couldn’t help it, I had to, it was still funny, even after the slap! Think of it from my point of view!” I pleaded her.
She had calmed down most of the way “ok I won’t kick you out, only because we didn’t actually do anything and because it was actually kind of funny.” She chuckled a little, which I found almost a little too cute.
“Oh and I didn’t know you were a virgin. Sorry for scaring you so bad.”
She detected the sorrow in my voice “don’t worry about it, if I were to sleep with any other stallion I know, they would probably pull the same prank. Maybe even a few mares.”
I thought this statement over for a minute before deciding to let that dog lie. “Should we go and eat or what, I'm starving.”
“Yea, I guess you’re right.” We went down the stairs in silence to find spike already making eggs and pancakes with some toast.
“Hey Twi, I heard you guys goin’ at it last night. Sounded intense.” He winked at me while Twilights back was turned. He must have heard our conversation upstairs.
She looked at me with a look that rivaled the last one for fear factor. “Hey my memory sucks, we might have.” I said with what I hoped was an honest look on my face.
She ran into the bathroom at a full gallop. I assumed she was checking some things I wish to not go into detail about. She came back out with a small smirk on “you two almost had me there, but I checked, and no, we didn’t.”
“Hey did you have a weird taste in your mouth this morning, it might have been oral.”
“That’s what it sounded like.”
She got that fearful look on her face again, only this time with a touch of green. She ran into the bathroom again and we heard some sick noises over the next fifteen minutes. When she came back out she was miserable looking. “Twi are you ok?” I asked my voice full of concern.
“Yea, I just told myself that I never wanted to do oral. It sounded disgusting in the books I read about it. That’s all.”
“So you’re not mad that we…” I put my pointer and middle fingers twisted around each other in the air.
“No, not anymore.”
“‘Cause you know we’ve been puling your leg the whole time right?”
She looked at me with a look full of hatred “you mean to tell me that I’ve been barfing in the bathroom for the past fifteen minutes for nothing?!?!”
“Um… yes?” she slapped me again, hard.
“YOUSONOFABITCH!” she yelled at me. There was the cussing out.
I smiled sheepishly, just remembering the day before, how scared Spike was when Twi approached him even with a little hostility. ‘I'm gonna die, aren’t I’ I could have sworn at the time her hair was starting to smolder before spike stepped in “hey, hey, hey, you didn't actually do anything, and he didn't know any better, or that you would react like this, and plus it was me who started all of this. Don’t blame Dillon.” At this realization she cooled down considerably. This also calmed my nerves.
“Well I should probably get going, gotta go see rarity. Bye!” and with that I got up off the ground, quickly dusted myself off and rushed out the door before Twilight could say anything.