//------------------------------// // chapter 9 // Story: Discorded Humanity // by The Drifting Bard //------------------------------// "My Limit Break involves a moose, the demon Baphomet and a Kuiper Belt object. It takes four hours and you can't skip any of the cutscenes." As I walked through the new ruins of Canterlot, it has begun to rain, seemingly normal at first, but it then became Chocolate. “Talk about childish, Slaneesh” I huffed, pulling my sword out of the scabbard, watching as the blade glowed with a dim shine. I could make out the silhouette of Slaneesh making its way towards me, with an evil grin on its face, my blood dried on its claws. “You know, I was taught a long time ago to stand up and fight” I looked at the beast dead in the eyes. “You’ve become disorganized, Slaneesh, now its time to end this” I stood my ground in an offensive position. Having learned a thing or two about how to use a blade, I held the sword in a tai chi sort of pose. Remembering what a friend told me the sword is an extension of oneself, I stood my ground as Slaneesh quickly took the offensive; I was blocking hits and dodging chaotic energy waves. With this attack pattern I calculated a plan, simply observing his movements until the right moment. I lunged forwards, catching Slaneesh off guard, a hit. I caught him in the chest, but was nowhere near his heart. I struck again, another hit, he took it in the arm, putting up his defences in a last ditch effort. The third strike was deflected by a fist to the face. I recoiled back to my original position. Thinking it through, and because he was now the personification of chaos, it would be harder to go on the offensive like I had done before. “Come on, what are you waiting for?” I was goading the demon into attacking me; it worked because he snaked around behind me. Using the sword as a mirror, I then brought the sword round in a tornado motion, cutting off the beast’s tail. The beast roared in agony, a perfect strike. I used this to my advantage, I lunged forwards, blade extended in front of me, but Slaneesh was smart, he picked up his dismembered tail and struck me with it, sending me into a wall, my sword dropped to the floor beside me. “Fuck this,” I stood up, cracked my knuckles “I’ve been holding back, all this time I’ve been here I’ve been holding back” I knelt down, eyes locked onto the beast. I picked up my sword, placing it back into its scabbard. Slaneesh stood in front of me, puzzled by my actions “and the princesses think they’ve got problems,” I rolled my eyes, walking towards the beast, who stood there ever confused. “I feel like I live in a world made of cardboard. Always taking care not to break something, to break someone” I punched him through a wall, “Never allowing myself to lose control, even for a moment, or someone could die” picked him up by the throat. “But you can take it, can't you, big man? What we have here is a rare opportunity for me to cut loose, and show you just how powerful I really am” I pulled back my fist, and heard the crack of thunder and bones as my fist collided with his ribcage. Slaneesh went flying into the air, landing in a heap of debris. I watched as he pushed rubble off himself, and glared at me, then sped towards me in anger, “I WILL MOUNT YOUR HEAD WHERE MY TAIL USED TO BE” he roared. I quickly drew my sword in defense, bringing the flat side down on his skull. The collision had caused a small shockwave, rippling through the leaves, kicking up dust. The power emitted from the shockwave had rippled up through my arm, sending a sharp pain through my body. I collapsed onto one knee, I stabbed my sword into the ground for leverage, pushing my self up. I suddenly felt myself being lifted into the air, I had one of Slaneesh’s palms on my chest and the other hand was wrapped around my leg. He then proceeded to throw me, but I was smart. Using my elemental powers, I used the momentum of the throw to fly in an arc, landing behind him. I then stabbed him in the back,literally. He swung round, claws at the ready. He brought a set of claws slashing down across my face, just close enough to leave a small scratch. I tripped him over, hacking off the offending arm in the proccess. He proceeded to pick up his arm and beat me with it. I kept my distance, in the end he threw dark energy at me once again, I deflected it, and noticed him charging towards me. “whats the one rule of combat,” I said, readying myself to defend agaist an attack that fatally wounded me previously. I brought my sword up in a firey blaze. The heat from the blade cauterizing the wound. His hand fell to the ground behind me. I was stood a few meters behind him, I turned around. “look around you, Dave, you’re still on your own” Slaneesh cackled, but he was wrong. “why are you laughing?” he asked. I shrugged my shoulders, still laughing at his statement. “an element of harmony is never alone” I stated, as the crystal embedded in my forehead started to glow. What came next shocked even me. I floated in mid air for what seemed like 10 minutes, slowly being revitalized by the elements. Stranger still, was the energy circling around me, creating golden armour. I felt stronger once again, no longer fatigued. I landed on the floor, within a dust cloud. “you claim to be a god?” I asked rhetorically. I drew my sword, which felt lighter. I attempted to fly, but quickly found myself still bound to the ground. Slaneesh once again started to cackle. I picked up a small rock, aiming for his head. I threw it, gaining a less than perfect shot. It bounced off his chin, shutting him up. He walked up to me, staring into my eyes. “you know chaos cant be stopped” before he could say anything elese, I grabbed him by the arm, yanked it out of its socket brought my fist up into his elbow, and snapped his wrist. “the thing about chaos? It’s easily organized,” I chuckled darkly. “Discord, no….Lysander,” The beast’s eyes widened, “Celestia forgave you years ago, so has Luna… you cost them their parents, yet they forgave you” something inside the beast had stirred. The name of the seemingly deceased human, caused the beast unimaginable pain, “Lysander is dead!” Slaneesh roared. “only Slaneesh remains!” he continued, smacking my leg with his foot, tripping me over, he then attempted to cave in my ribcage. I rolled to avoid it. Scrambling to my feet, I threw my sword above him, jumped up and caught it, slicing his back. The blood trickling down his back gave off a pungent smell, the smell of a rotting corpse. “how, your now a normal human again” Slaneesh exclaimed in pain. “nothin normal about me, never was.” I ran forwards, “now do me a favour and die already”I stated, staring into Slaneesh’s eyes. I brought my knee up, connecting it with the beast’s chin. “you know, for an immortal, you sure do break easily” I laughed. “also,” I plunged my sword in his heart, then drew it out, twisting while I did it, watching the beast squirm in agony. “for the coupe de grace” I swung my sword level with his neck. “I win, fatality” I muttered, picking up his head. the armour which had surrounded me had disipated, leaving me in tattered jeans, bloodied boots and covered in blood, cuts and bruises. I walked along the hard track back to the others. The chaos had been stopped. The world slowly began to return to its former glory. As I walked, I noticed the survivors were coming out of their hiding places. Greeting me with smiles, I even nnoticed some of the gaurdsponies were a tad roughed up, but still alive. Two of them rushed to my side, to make sure I wouldn’t fall. I was tired. “Sir, are you okay? Do you require any assistance?” I looked down at the guard with a smile. “no I’m fine, but thanks for the offer, I must apologize for the destruction I have caused though” the guard returned the smile. A thoughtful look spread across his face. “you need not bother Sir, it wasn’t your fault” I was gobsmacked. Finally reaching the clearing, I threw the head of my enemy into the middle of the camp. “Job done” I chuckled, the dried blood smeared across my face glistened in the newly risen moon. “I must say, I was expecting you both to die” Celestia spoke, “if there’s one thing I’ve learnt over the years, its that you cant have everything” I nodded, I noticed the lake. “excuse me princess” I walked over to wash off the blood, dipping the sword into it to clean the blade. “that’s better”. I heard one of the gaurds whisper into her ear, basically filling her in on what transpired. “Luna, come here” she called for her sister, “private lance, tell her what you told me” he whispered in Luna’s ear. I wached as her eyes widened in shock. As I spotted the tents pitched up, I limped forth, and perched myself infront of the fire. The fire warmed my body, I then noticed the stinging sensations, my wounds werent bad, but they were sure as hell annoying. “what do you reckon we should do, Tia” Luna whispered to her sister. Celestia was worried that, in the recent events which had transpired. The battle had left half of Canterlot in ruin. “I think I know” Celestia trotted back towards me. she sat down next to me, and placed a wing on my back. “you’ve been through hell for us, and for that I thank you” I felt a hoof on my shoulder. “does this mean we’re on good terms now?” I asked, a tear slowly forming. “yes it does, as soon as everything is back to normal, I will send a letter forth, requesting your presence at the castle, Dave,” “thank you,” I picked up the longcoat I left behind, and put it on. “does this mean our new arangement is fulfilled?” I asked, the princess simply nodded. “I must apologize for the harsh treatment I gave you upon our first meeting” she said, but I brushed it off. “no apology nessesary” I smiled. “I’m just glad it’s over,” I heard a small voice, and whispers. “how is Applebloom?” I asked the princess, she looked despondant for a moment. “Applejack is with her, She’s alive, but,” I raised my hand, placing it on her chin. “which tent?” “third one on the left” she indicated. I pulled the tent door to oneside and quietly stepped in. I placed a hand on Applejack’s shoulder, and the other on Big Mac’s. “I’m so sorry” they didn’t even move, I knelt down. “how is she doing?” I asked. Not expecting an answer. “She’s gonna be fine, no broken bones or nothing” Applejack answered. “who checked her over?” I asked. “Nurse Redheart” hearing her name, I was releieved. “I’m gonna Check on the others” I walked out. I was suddenly tackled to the ground, by a pink ball of energy. “ohmygoshareyouokayyoucouldhavedied!!!!!” Pinkie rambled on and on. “as much as I share your enthusiams at me being alive,” I chuckled “I’d like to see the others” the pink puff balls eyes widened. “sure, follow me” she bounced along to the other tents. “pinkie, wait here please” I smiled “okie dokie lokie” she rambled on with a smile. I moved the tent door to the side, to see Fluttershy and Rainbow comforting Twilight. Turning back around to leave, I was face to face with a very worried Rarity. “my dear, Nurse Redheart wants to patch you up” she then levitated a black t-shirt, placing it in my hand. “put this on afterwards” she then hugged me. I walked up up to Redheart, who took one look at me, “you sure know how to put a Nurse through her paces don’t ya” she giggled. “careful, some of them are still a bit tender” I joked. I turned to watch Rainbow and Fluttershy leave the tent, I put my finger to my lips as they saw me. the two pegusi promptly flew over, “what the hell are you thinking?” Rainbow asked me, she was stressed out, I could see it. “She’s just gone to sleep” Fluttershy continued. “Twilight’s been worrying about you,” I sighed when I heard this “when the fighting died down, she thought that…you….” I placed my hand on Fluttershy’s head “could have been, but im not” I said with a smile. I put the t-shirt on. Wincing a little as I pulled it over the bandages. “now im incredibly tired, so if you don’t mind” I stood up, picked up the longcoat and walked into the tent quietly. Twilight looked so peaceful, but she also looked cold. I did what a any gentleman should do, I laid my longcoat over her, then laid down opposite her. I could hear her whimpering in her sleep. “gimme back my monkey” I coulnt help but chuckle a little bit, before finally succumbing to the deep recesses of sleep, I leant forward and kissed her on the nose . Finally resting my eyelids, I fell into a deep slumber.