//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 - A Tale of Souls and Swords // Story: Reforging a Broken Blade // by ElkinFencer10 //------------------------------// After closing up his shop and heading home for a quick shower, Razor Blade made his way to the library. I wonder why she wants to know what's bothering me? She'll probably think it's stupid. Obviously it's because you're her friend, idiot. Okay, I'm talking to myself. I need to chill.... When he knocked on the library door, it briefly glowed purple before opening. "Come on in. I'll be out in just a minute!" he heard Twilight call from the other room. He walked into the library and stood off to the side by a bookshelf, waiting for the unicorn hostess to come in from the kitchen. When she did, she did so carrying a plate of daisy sandwiches and hay fries. "I figured I'd bring us something to snack on while we talked," she said with a smile. Damn, she's thoughtful. It had been quite a while since anypony went out of her way to try to cheer me up, but in less than a month, two have; first Fluttershy invited me to their dinner party, and now Twilight is here trying to get me out of my melancholic funk, and she has food, to boot. He hadn't realized that he'd been staring at Twilight until she giggled and asked "Did I grow a second horn or something? You've been staring at me for a whole minute. You're welcome to sit down, you know." Immediately blushing, Razor Blade quickly seated himself. "So tell me what's been on your mind. You finally seemed to be cheering up when you, Fluttershy, and I were talking last week, but then you got all bummed out." Razor Blade remained quiet for a moment, searching for the right words. This wasn't a topic he was particularly fond of discussing, but his friends in both Appaloosa and Vanhoover had been telling him for months that needed to talk to somepony about it and get it off his chest. He knew he needed to, but that did nothing to change the fact that he didn't want to. As much as Razor Blade loved telling stories, either true or fictional, this was one story that he didn't want to tell. For once, there was a story too painful for him to tell, but it had to be told. He knew this story had to be told. "The truth will set you free." Isn't that how the old saying went? He closed his eyes and took one last deep breath. "Okay," he began, steeling himself against the torrent of memories he was about to unleash upon himself. "It all started four years ago, back when I first arrived at Appaloosa University...." ~Four Year Ago - Appaloosa University~ Razor Blade had just begun his freshman year at Appaloosa University to study metal-smithing. He didn't have any friends as of yet, so he spent a lot of his time studying in the library. It was during one of these trips to the library that he met the pony who would consume the next few years of his life. "Hi there. Is somepony sitting here?" she asked, motioning to the chair next to him at the table. "I've been searching high and low for a place to sit to get some reading done, but it's like everypony decided to come to the library today." Razor Blade looked up to see the most beautiful unicorn on whom he'd ever laid eyes. Her coat was a deep red, almost burgundy, and her mane was as white and pristine as the winter's first snow. He tried to tell her that she was welcome to the seat, but all that came out was incoherent stuttering. After a few seconds, he simply gave up and pulled the chair back for her. "I'm Flame Knife. That's quite the impressive cutie mark you've got there. Are you a soldier?" the unicorn asked. "Uhh, n-n-no, I'm a, a b-blacksmith." That's when Razor noticed Flame's cutie mark - a dagger. "And you? W-what does the knife on your flank mean?" She laughed, saying "My family name, obviously. That, and I'm a straight up boss in knife fights." She grinned with a wink. Her entire demeanor - her laugh, her smile, everything - was just so relaxed. Before long, Razor Blade couldn't help but relax. He'd always frozen up around fillies, but for something reason, around Flame, he felt...comfortable. At peace. No studying was done that afternoon. On the contrary, the two were asked to leave the library because they kept giggling to each other like schoolfoals. It was still the first week of classes, and Razor wanted to make sure that he got plenty of rest that night, so he bid her good night, but not before making plans to meet for lunch the next day. As he lay in bed, drifting to sleep, he couldn't stop thinking about her intoxicating scent and her contagious laugh. Was that a dream? That had to have been a dream. I must have fallen asleep at some point and dreamt up that unicorn. Stallions like me don't meet mares like her, and mares like her certainly don't like stallions like me. He decided, though, that perhaps it was real, and that his luck had just taken a turn for the better. He had never had good luck with fillies throughout school and had never had a real fillyfriend, but there's a first time for everything, right? At lunch the next day, he kept the conversation focused on Flame. He wanted to know everything about her. She fascinated him in a way nothing before ever had. Overnight, he seemed to have fallen head over hooves in love with her. It was as if she had cast a spell on him. "You've set my heart ablaze," he told her, only half joking. "Oh Celestia, please tell me you didn't really just say that. That's SO cheesy, but in an adorably awkward sort of way," she said, laughing the laugh that he grew to love more each time he heard it. She kissed him on the cheek before she got up to dispose of their lunch trays. When she returned to the table, he asked, "So what's your major? You know all about my plans to set up a forge and service the military, but I know precious little about your plans and goals." "Oh, well, I'm here studying psychology. I want to know what makes ponies think and feel the way they do. I want to understand how a pony's mind and emotions work. Not sure what I'll do with it once I finish my degree, but I want to do something along those lines," she said. "Being a unicorn would make that even more useful, I bet. I've even heard of spells that change the way ponies feel about each other." All the time she was talking, he couldn't tear his eyes from her face for even a second. He was completely ensnared by her beauty. Very quickly, she began the feel the same attraction that he did. Here was a stallion who would care for her and provide for her to the best of his abilities and treat her like a lady. Here was a mare who could always make him smile and knew just want to say to make him laugh. Soon she became his fillyfriend and he her coltfriend, and for a time, it was as if all were right in the world. They were inseparable, and never was the couple seen without grins a mile wide on their faces. Literally every minute they weren't in class or asleep, they were together. Those first few months were honestly the happiest of Razor's life. He went to bed every night thinking to himself This must be the love they speak of in those myths I read. Like two halves of the same whole, they completed each other. Where one lacked, the other excelled. Razor was terrible at math, but Flame was a walking calculator. Razor's mind was as narrow as the old side roads in Canterlot, but Flame taught him love and tolerance. Flame's temper was true to her name and burned white hot, but Razor taught her patience and forgiveness. It was like a match made in heaven, and all of their friends mutual agreed in unanimity. Even the most compatible couple eventually has its differences, however, and Razor and Flame were no exception. Razor Blade's family was old fashioned in a lot of ways, whereas Flame Knife's family was from Manehatten where a lot of the old traditions had been long abandoned. Razor's friends, especially those from Vanhoover who had known him the longest, picked on that immediately. They all warned him from the beginning that the affair would end in tragedy, but all Razor could do was say, "You're wrong. You don't know how we work; you don't know her like I do." These differing views on tradition became a point of contention between the two. Despite being the one to teach Razor Blade to tolerate different opinions, it was Flame whose intolerance of Razor's more traditional values caused their first major fight. Razor Blade's mother had always raised him to be a gentlecolt and to treat mares with respect. In Razor's mind, this included respecting boundaries, even if neither he nor she particularly wanted those boundaries to be observed. This started to be a problem when Flame wanted to cut out the "asleep" part of "They were always together unless they were in class or asleep." Razor felt that it wasn't quite appropriate for ponies to share a bed regularly when they were still just fillyfriend and coltfriend, and so recently so, but when Flame proved herself adamant about the issue, he grew weary of fighting with his beloved and caved in her demands. Okay, he would tell himself, it's just like a sleepover. I can deal with this. A little bit of appeasement is probably all it will take. The fighting resurfaced when Flame made it clear that she wanted more than companionship and a kiss here and there; she wanted a deeply physical relationship. Razor Blade was very old fashioned in this regard, and he adamantly opposed this new demand. Long ago, when he a still a colt, he had made a vow to himself that he would lie intimately with no mare until they had been married. When simple seduction proved unsuccessful in dissuading him from this, Flame began to cry, screaming at him that his reluctance meant that he either did not love her as he said he did or that he was repulsed by her. How can she think that? he would ask himself. I love this mare more than anypony in all of Equestria. I would take up arms against Celestia herself if it meant being with Flame, and she's the most beautiful mare I've ever beheld. Why can't she see that? The more he thought about it, the more he began to see the unfairness of the whole situation. I'm the one who should be having those doubts! If she loved me as much as as I love her, shouldn't she be willing to wait? After running through this train of thought, he always approached the next fight ready to drop bombs, so to speak, but as soon as he saw her, he found himself disarmed. He would always immediately back down and apologize, even if he knew in the back of his head that he was in the right. Her manipulative abilities were as consistently effective as they were irksome. These arguments continued sporadically for several weeks. They would have a huge fight, she would storm out of his room in bitter tears, they would spend the rest of the day apart, and then they would make up the next morning only to repeat the cycle a day or two later. Eventually, however, she left a note on his saddlebag one morning when she left for class. My dearest Razor Blade, Please meet me by our tree near the stream when you get your lunch break. There's something I need to talk to you about. Yours eternally, Flame Blade Her signing the note with his last name left him confused. He thought it was adorable and sweet, but they weren't married. He met her at the tree that afternoon, however, and found her staring out at the stream where they'd shared many a picnic. "What's up, sweetie?" he said, hoping that this wasn't an "I think we need to see other ponies" talk. His fears were relieved a bit when she looked back at him with a smile on her face. "I just wanted to talk. I don't think you realize just how much you mean to me, so I wanted to say it to make sure you know. I love you more than anypony and anything in Equestria. If you asked me to marry you right now, I'd say yes in a heartbeat. I signed that note this morning the way that I did because, in my mind, we're already married. I'm going to be with you forever, Razor Blade. Forever and always. I promise you." As he listened to her short monologue and let her words soak in, a voice in the back of his head kept saying Don't listen to her, Razor. She's just bucking with your head. She's trying to lower your guard. He couldn't follow his own advice, though. With tears in his eyes, he kissed the mare in front of him and stayed in her embrace for a full five minutes before looking at her to say "I love you with all my heart, Flame Knife. I promise you, I will never leave your side, and I promise you, I will be forever faithful." "I swear to you, Razor Blade, I never want to be with another stallion as long as I live." Flame Knife had hoped that her short speech would convince Razor to yield his old fashioned sensibilities to her lust. She had it all planned out in her head - they would meet underneath the tree, she would make a beautifully scripted confession of her undying love, and he would be swept off his hooves in a wave of affection and trust her with his all. Everything went perfectly according to plan up until the finale, the part about which she cared the most. It's not that she wanted to use him for sex, so to speak, but in her mind, a pony who wasn't ready for sex wasn't ready for a committed relationship. After that afternoon, the fighting continued to grow worse. Chaos overtook their once idyllic relationship. Where once there had been silence, there was now only angsty shouting; where once there had been smiles, there were now only tears. As with all emotions, this was not an absolute constant. There were days when all felt right in the world again, but the fights would always return, each one more bitter than the last. ~Present Day - Ponyville~ Razor Blade sat silently on Twilight Sparkle's couch, eyes burning holes into the floor, with tears streaming down his face. Throughout his entire recounting of the story, his eyes rarely left that spot on the library floor. Twilight wanted desperately to say something to him, but this was one of the few times in her life when she was completely at a loss. "I'm rather tired, Twilight. If it's alright with you, I think I'll head home and go to bed. It's been a long day. Sword crafting and all that...." Razor Blade said, feeling more mental and emotional exhaustion than he had in a long time. "O-of course, Razor," Twilight said, still trying to process everything she'd just been told. She hadn't expected him to open up to her so completely so quickly, but she was humbled that he trusted her with what she knew had to be a sensitive and painful part of his past. She could tell that, no matter what he told anypony else or even himself, he'd been dying to get this off his chest. Why else would he just spill all this to somepony he's only recently met? Twilight asked herself. As he got up to make his way to the door, Twilight quickly stood up and caught him in a strong hug. She knew she had to do something to show her friend that she cared for him and was there for him, and that was all she could think to do. At first, Razor stayed still, caught off guard by the sudden gesture, but soon returned the embrace. "Thank you...." he said so softly that it was almost a whisper. "For what?" Twilight asked, looking up at the stallion. She hadn't realized until then what a beautiful, deep shade of green his eyes were, like the needles of a young evergreen. "For listening. For caring. For wanting to help even though I didn't think I wanted you to, because it did; it's helped. I thought I'd just embarrass myself talking to you about this tonight, but....it helped. So...yeah. Thanks." The purple unicorn smiled at him and said, "Of course. Let me know if there's anything I can do for you. Feel free to stop by again if you want to talk some more. I'm free every night this week." "I might take you up on that." With that, the pegasus said good bye and made his way home. Within seconds of hitting his pillow, he was asleep, and as sleep claimed his consciousness, a peace he hadn't known in many years washed over him. Despite falling asleep peacefully, his night was anything but. He thrashed in his sleep, tormented by an unrelenting cascade of memories buried deep in his sub-conscious. In these dreams, there was no light. There was no feeling. There was no substance. There was only sound. There was only her voice. The voice of the mare who had built him up only to break him down. The voice of the mare who had raised him to a pedestal only to watch with sick delight as he plunged into the depths of despair. "I'll love you forever and always, Razor Blade. I swear it, baby." "As far as I'm concerned, we're already married. I don't need a ceremony to tell me that. And I don't believe in divorce, ever." Though he was aware of his own lack of substance in this ethereal purgatory, his soul was seized by intense emotion. Anger. Love. Angst. Fear. Remorse. Hopelessness. Worthlessness. Hate. "I'll never be with another stallion, I swear it." "I hate her for what she did to me." "Forever and always." Hate. He awoke in a rage, almost putting a hoof thorough his bed. Angry tears streaming down his face, he got up and, standing on his two hind legs, punched a hole clean through his bedroom door, letting loose a blood curdling cry. Releasing some of pent up fury with the strike, he began to calm down. Once he regained some composure, he pulled his hoof out of his brutalized bedroom door and wiped the tears from his eyes. Heh....Guess some of that tramp's temper rubbed off on me....I never punched doors or walls before I met Flame.... Razor considered trying to go back to bed, but realizing that dawn was only an hour away, he opted to stay up and get an early start to the day. He then thought back to the conversation he'd had with Twilight Sparkle just hours before. It's true, talking about his past and reliving those memories had been terribly painful, and bringing those memories to the surface was undoubtedly what caused both his nightmare and the subsequent anger, yet, he felt oddly free, almost as if the memories' hold on him was weakening. "I need to do something to thank to her, to show her that I appreciate her being there for me despite not having known me for long," he said, looking down at Rush, just now coming out from under the bed to where he'd retreated from his master's violent awakening. He went downstairs to prepare some breakfast for himself and for his canine companion, thinking of ways to show Twilight his gratitude. As he was eating, an idea struck him. He quickly scribbled a shopping list with things he'd need. When 8 am rolled around and most of the shops in Ponyville opened, he and Rush made their way to the town market to get the items on his list, after which they raced to his smithy. To avoid distractions, Razor kept the door to his shop locked and the sign flipped to "Closed" all day, slaving away at his furnace and anvil with only his dog to keep him company. This wasn't like the days he spent making cookie-cutter weapons for the sake of keeping himself preoccupied. No, this time, he worked with a goal in mind. This time his work was not that of a pony who was just trying to make a living but rather that of an artisan who was trying to forge a masterpiece. For hours upon hours, he hammered, chiseled, cooled, and reheated. Once again, the sounds of hammer against metal rang out through the town. The sun was beginning its descent to the west when he finally lifted his mask and put down his hammer, satisfied at last with his product. He wrapped the gift carefully in a sheet of cloth and placed it in his saddle bag, then racing to Bon-Bon's confectionery to buy some caramel chews before she closed for the evening. A few hours later, after having taken a shower and fed and walked Rush, Razor gathered his saddle bag and made his way to the library to continue his conversation with Twilight. When he knocked on the door, Twilight had a look of surprised on her face. "Oh, hey Razor Blade. Come on in. What a pleasant surprise. I didn't expect to see you back so soon," she said with a smile. "If you're busy, I can leave. I just wanted to do something to show you how much I appreciate your listening to me last night," Razor said. Cutting him off before he could continue with the half-scripted speech he had in his head, Twilight said, "I don't mind at all. If you recall, I'm the one who specifically told you I was free every night this week. I just didn't expect you take me up on the offer." "Well, as a blacksmith who specializes in weapons and armor, there's not a whole lot that I could think to do for a beautiful mare like you," he said, blushing when he realized that he'd let that slip, "but I thought you might like this." He withdrew the carefully wrapped parcel from his saddle bag and hoofed it to Twilight. "What is it?" she asked, levitating it over towards her. "Unwrap it and find out." As she telekinetically untied the string and let the cloth fall to the floor, she revealed a sheathed blade with a golden scabbard, her cutie mark engraved in the metal on either side. The hilt was adorned with amethyst of a soft violet that was almost identical to her coat. As she drew the blade, she was amazed by the quality of the craftsmanship that went into it. "You...you made this?" she asked, amazed at the gift. Razor blade simply nodded his head. She continued to admire the sword. The blade itself was just shy of three feet long and only an inch wide - a blade clearly designed for finesse rather than brute strength. The metal shone so brightly that it could have passed for pure silver. "I started working on it shortly after dawn and didn't finish until right before dusk, at which point I went to get these," he said, holding out the bag of Bon-Bon's caramel candies. "I knew that a pony like you wouldn't have much use for a weapon, but I thought maybe if it doubled as art, that you might like it." Twilight looked up at him with a huge grin on her face, at which he couldn't help but smile back. "I absolutely love it," she said as she walked forward and placed a kiss lightly on his cheek before turning around to put the ornamental blade somewhere safe until she thought of where to display it. Razor Blade stood there in blissful shock, his cheeks glowing like blood red beacons. Am I dreaming? I bet I'm dreaming. I have to be dreaming. I'm definitely dreaming, but damn it, I don't want to wake up, he thought to himself. "Um...hello? Are you okay? Anypony awake in there?" He realized that he'd been staring off again when Twilight started jumping up and down in front of him. "Huh? What? Oh, yeah, I'm fine," he said with a sheepish grin. "Would you like you come eat some of these candies with me? You don't have to continue your story if you don't want to, but it would be a shame to do something sweet like that and then just leave," Twilight said, her voice sounding the slightest bit flirtatious. Although he was dense as a lead pipe when it came to such things, Razor Blade completely missed her subtle hint, but he sat down next to her anyway. "I don't mind finishing the story. I mean, if you want me to, that is." Don't feather this up now, idiot. Nopony wants to hear more of your whining. "I'd love to hear more if you want to share. And it's not whining if it's to a friend who wants to help," Twilight said, as if reading his mind. Shit. Can she read my thoughts? Wait, that's ridiculous. You're being ridiculous. Just shut up and finish your story. "Alright," he said, "Where was I? Oh yeah, 'We're already married' and all that stuff. Right. So, we had been dating for about a year by this point...." ~Three Year Ago - Appaloosa University~ Their relationship remained a struggle, but they had kept it intact somehow, although neither of them could have told anypony how they managed to stay together. The focus of Razor's thoughts began to shift to At least we stayed together rather than what his friends back home (Flame's controlling streak made it difficult to make friends in Appaloosa) told him that his focus needed to be - If I'm not happy anymore, I shouldn't be with her. "It's not like that," he would insist. "I'm still happy, I guess. We're just in a rough patch is all. You guys just don't get it; you just don't get us." Unfortunately for him, what was as clear as Princess Celestia's day to everypony else in his life was an enigma shrouded in mystery to Razor Blade - he had invested so much time and energy into making that relationship work, but Flame Knife didn't seem interested in putting any effort into it herself. For a time, the fighting plateaued. It never really got better, but it stopped getting worse. For a time, that is. Razor Blade quickly began to realize that Flame Knife was, in all probability, a nymphomaniac. To most stallions, this would have been a dream come true, but Razor wasn't most stallions. Part of the reason that he'd always had trouble with fillies - and part of what initially attracted Flame to him - was that he wasn't interested in the "Buck, Dump, Repeat" pattern that most stallions his age used with relationships. That just isn't how he worked emotionally. "It's not how a gentlecolt treats a lady," he would insist. "It's not respectful." Remember, Razor Blade, communication is the key to any healthy relationship. Just talk to her about it. She loves you, remember? She'll understand, but she isn't a mind reader; you have to tell her. When he did talk to her about it, however, it was as if somepony had taken a long forgotten broken record from the past and started playing it again and again and again. "Why don't you find me attractive? Why don't you love me the way I love you?" she would scream at him, tears streaming down her face. In the back of his mind, Razor would always think, Gods in heaven, she's being ridiculous! I never said any of that! Why am I even putting up with this shit? Whenever he'd start to say something to that effect, however, it would always come out as an apology for something. It was if he were never able to stand up for himself, always defaulting to admitting that he was wrong somehow even though he knew he wasn't. All of these fights would end the same - Flame would storm out of the room in tears, and Razor would take a long walk to clear his mind. He began to retreat into himself, staying largely silent during these fights. Even during their happier times, she could tell that within him, a seed of dissatisfaction had been planted. Her strategy for dealing with this? Attack it. Brutally, completely, and mercilessly attack it. He began to hear "You just love your video games more than you love me! All you care about is Mare-io Brothers and Legend of Epona. Why don't you want to spend time with me?" The irony of this accusation: Razor had left all of his games at home in Vanhoover after his first semester, keeping nothing with him in Appaloosa so that he could spend all of his time with Flame. This trend continued, and the fights intensified. Sadness begot sadness; pain begot pain. He had known mares whose coltfriends psychologically and emotionally abused them, but Razor never expected to be on the receiving end of such abuse. What kind of a stallion gets emotionally abused by his fillyfriend? How pathetic I've become.... These thoughts proliferated, and from them, insecurities propagated that would tear at the very foundation of who Razor Blade thought he was. On the outside, they were a happy couple, or at least they put on as happy a face as they could muster. They went to the few classes they had together. They went to their Appaloosan Paranormal Study Organization meetings every week. They ate together on campus every night. This went on for two years. They tried to make sure everypony else thought that they were as happy as ever. In reality, however, the relationship was like a prison for Razor Blade. "Dude, just break up with her. That mare's no good for you!" his friends from back home would tell him. When he was being honest with himself, he would sometimes admit that he wanted to. I made a promise, though. A gentlecolt does not break a promise, no matter how ill advised it it may have been he would think to himself. I made a promise to her, and she made a promise to me. We'll be together forever. This is just a rough patch, right? This will pass, won't it? "Good things come to those who wait." "Patience is a virtue." That's what mom always told me. If I just stick it out and persevere, it'll all be okay in the end. Autumn came, and they prepared to celebrate their three year anniversary. For the two months leading up to that occasion, things had started to feel normal again. Things started to feel like they did back at the beginning. They weren't fighting, they were smiling honest smiles, and they were laughing honest laughs. It was a breath of fresh air into the relationship that Razor Blade knew would revive their romance. This is the payoff of my perseverance and loyalty. This is the good thing that came to me who waited. For their three year anniversary, they spent the at the coast - Flame's favorite place in the world - and had a picnic, went to the aquarium, and even had the mandatory cliche romantic walk on the beach. Flame gave Razor the Ponystation 3 he'd been dying to have for ages, and he gave her the newest Game Colt. Everything felt fine. As he flew home at the end of the day, he thought to himself, This is it. We weathered the storm, and we're finally happy again. Three days later, the mailmare came, and he raced to the mailbox, hoping to see a letter from his beloved. Sure enough, he saw her familiar handwriting on an address from Manehatten, and he ran to his room to read it. What he read, though, made him as sick as the old mare's tales about how rainbows were made. My dearest Razor Blade, These past three years have been so special to me, and though we've had our ups and downs, I'll always think fondly of them. You've brought me more joy than I used to think anypony could. You've shown me what a true gentlecolt looks like, and you always did everything you could to ensure that I was happy and well cared for. That is why this letter pains me as much as I know it will pain you. There's no use beating around the bush, so I'll just put it out there; I met another stallion. He and I met several months ago when he moved to Appaloosa. I know you did all that you could to make me happy, and I truly did love you with all of my heart, but Remus make me feel...giddy. Like you used to make me feel. I know I promised you that I'd be with you forever, and it kills me to break that promise, but you'll be better off without me. I was terrible to you. I took advantage of you, both your emotions and your bits. I'm doing this for you as much as I'm doing it for me, maybe even more so for you. I hope we can still be friends. You promised me we'd always be best friends, no matter what. You won't break a promise to me, will you? I hope you don't hate me. I'll always love you. Flame Knife Upon finishing the letter, Razor Blade slumped to the floor. For more than three hours, he stared at the wall in front of him, his mind a machine overloaded by a power surge. He thought nothing. He saw nothing. He felt nothing. He just....stared, existing, but only just. He couldn't even cry. For three years, he had devoted his life to that mare. For three years, he gave his every bit and his every waking minute to that mare. Then, all at once, he was hit by a wave of realization, as if a dam had been torn down, flooding his mind with thoughts, images, and memories. He suddenly realized how taken advantage of he had been. He suddenly realized how unreciprocated his love had been. That's not to say that she didn't love him, but he knew then that she didn't love him nearly as strongly as he loved her, or as completely as he loved her, or as eternally as he loved her. Slowly, the ability to form his own thoughts returned. ....Damn you....Damn you to hell, you lying whorse....Damn you for making me love you. Damn you for breaking my heart, and damn you for not letting me hate you. For the next three days, he stayed in bed. He did not sleep except when his mother forced sleeping pills down his throat. He did not eat except when she forced food down his throat. He did not move except to shuffle to the bathroom, moving more slowly and with less life than a patient with a terminal illness. Until the end of the summer, he scarcely left his family's Vanhoover home. When school started back again, he returned to Appaloosa, but he left all of the clubs and organizations with which he and Flame had once been associated. He merely finished his degree and returned home. ~Present Day - Ponyville~ "About four months after graduation, I decided that I needed to get out and start my life anew, maybe try to make some new memories to replace all those bad ones, so here I am, in Ponyville, starting a new life in a new town on my own," Razor Blade said, finishing his story. Twilight Sparkle just sat in silence. She had no idea what to say. She had been left at a loss the night before, but she didn't even know where to begin after hearing that. Razor Blade started at the floor, a lone tear escaping his right eye and falling to the floor despite his best efforts to contain it. Both ponies sat in silence for several minutes before Razor felt a pair of small, purple hooves wrap around him. The scent of Twilight's mane was intoxicating, and it instantly calmed his nerves, frayed from reliving those agonizing memories. "What Flame did to you was....terribly cruel. Nopony deserves that kind of betrayal," Twilight said, struggling to find the words to comfort her friend. "It sounds like you were wonderful to her. Now that I've gotten to know you a bit better, I can say with confidence that Rarity was right last week; any mare would be lucky to have you." Razor Blade had barely registered what had been said when he felt Twilight's lips take his in a gentle, comforting kiss. Razor froze, stunned by what had just transpired. "I'm sorry...I shouldn't have done that..." Twilight said as she quickly pulled away, realizing how emotionally vulnerable the pegasus was at that moment. "Don't be, Twilight," Razor said, a smile creeping onto his face. "Truth be told, I've had a bit of a crush on you since I first met you." "I know," Twilight said, smiling ever so slightly. "It was kind of obvious when you kept starting at me and blushing." As if on cue, Razor blushed - again - before leaning forward to return the kiss. His smile then diminished just slightly, however, and he said, "I just don't know if I'm coltfriend material right now. I'm a bit whiny and mopey, in case you hadn't noticed..." Twilight just giggled, saying, "Maybe you just hadn't found the right mare to put a smile back on your face."