//------------------------------// // Chapter Four: The Average Delivery Part 1 // Story: Would Chaos Really Be So Bad? // by CosmicAfro //------------------------------// Your left leg is propping your head up on the counter as you lazily sway from side to side. You think to yourself and question how business could possibly be so slow on a day like today. Your shop had sprouted legs- chicken legs to be exact- and was periodically clucking through town. You had to apologize for when it pecked at some of the neighbors’ rooftops but even then your shop was obedient; if you said for it to sit, it sat. So why wasn’t there anyone calling to come inside and get some flower treats for themselves or for a gift for someone else? You didn’t know, even free advertising wasn’t in your favor today. As you smack your lips from another lazy yawn, you finally hear the call of a passerby wanting to get inside. “Yoo hoo, flower man? Are you up there?” Your shop crows at them. Maybe they were rooster legs, actually. What did you know, you didn’t farm chickens. Happily, rubbing some sleep out of your eyes, you demand your rooster store to perch and it does. It gently lowers itself to the ground and to your surprise, you’re met with the mailman: a gryphon. There wasn’t much that set this gryphon apart from others you had seen other than the feathers on the top of his head were combed backwards. Other than that, it was the typical brown and white feather coat routine. Also, what kind of gryphon said “Yoo hoo?” “Yes, do I have a delivery?” “-to make, you do. Yup, yessir, special request from a citizen in New Canterlot who wants some flowers, yup.” Something bugs you about the way he’s talking; he’s not enthusiastic about it but he talks like a kid. Nevertheless, he hands you a delivery card, sure enough it’s one of yours and filled out properly, and goes on his way. New Canterlot? That was at least a three day journey there and back. No way you were sending a delivery boy on that kind of errand, it would be too expensive. And the flowers probably wouldn’t survive the trip without proper care. You roll your eyes, that meant you were going to the big city. But how had someone from the big city gotten the business card anyways? You weren’t sure. You haven’t necessarily seen anyone take a card from the “Order ahead of time!” stack in a while. To be fair, you hadn’t paid much attention to it since it was normally behind the azaleas. A customer could have walked through and picked one up without your knowing. But out of all the major cities, why did it have to be New Canterlot? “Shop, head home.” ~~~ “Are you sure you’ll be ok? New Canterlot is, well, it’s not a great place,” your wife consoles you as you pack in some special water bottles into the travel bag. “I’ve been there once for business, I’d much rather get fired than go back.” “That bad, huh?” You can’t deny you haven’t heard the rumors about the place, but you know better than to judge by word of mouth alone. Although, from what you hear in every single rumor, Discord commonly resides there in a big central tower. You had seen Discord in the flesh once as he flew overhead. His very presence distorted space around him and his tail was near constantly snapping, changing things for the worse as he went. Suburb life wasn’t so bad, you were away from most of the chaos; rural areas might actually be peaceful from time to time. “Really, we’ll just pay some young mare or colt to go there for us, you don’t need to go.” You explain once more how the order would be wilted by the time you got there. If you had one of the light orbs, it’d be a different story. But you don’t. She gives you a longing look like she really doesn’t want you to go. She blinks out a tear and gives that understanding smile you love. “Ok, but please be careful. I swear if you return home something other than what you are right now…” she doesn’t finish the thought. You get what she means though. Ponies who went to the city were occasionally inverted in their personalities as a means of entertainment for the master of chaos. Only a few, a very select few, ever turned themselves back to normal and they were nowhere close to cities. The idea of finding a delivery boy sounded more and more plausible. But you knew that even with the best of instructions, the flowers would still be drooping by the time you got there without your special attention. You had a name to uphold that was synonymous with quality. “I promise, I won’t.” You stare right into her eyes. “I mean it.” You check your wrist watch. “Ok, I’ll be going.” You stand at the doorway to your bedroom and look back. “And I’ll come back, just like this: Pink, brown mane, watering can cutie mark with the rainbow drop coming out of it, and no Discordiant Transfer about.” You sling the travel bag over your back. She nods. You take a step through the door and portal to the front of your house. You sigh. “…I hope.” ~~~ The train is on time, surprisingly. It’s one of those “Old West” trains. No one really remembers why they’re called that, west isn’t even a direction anymore. It slows to a screeching halt on the tracks and puffs out a gigantic plume of smoke with a withering hiss. Small doors open outwards, signaling for the passengers to come aboard. You see through the windows that there isn’t anyone else on the train. With the bag of flowers in your mouth, you go to the second to last train car since only a few passengers are headed that way. As you step through the door, a pony approaches you. He’s dark grey with a light grey mane and his eyes look heavy as if he hadn’t seen some sleep in a while. “Ticket.” You fetch your ticket out of the bag and show it to him. With a deflated groan, he assures you forward to a seat and then goes to meet the next passenger. You presume that was one of the discorded ponies… not something you’d like to become. As you stuff your travel bag under your seat, the whistle blows. “Attention passengers, this is your conductor speaking. Today’s train is headed for New Canterlot and will reach Roostville shortly afterwards. I encourage you to look out the windows to appreciate today’s view.” You look to your left and see the open landscape. The hills are moving like the ocean and the sky is a brilliant green. The clouds were nurturing the land by fighting each other with knives, each one bleeding copious amounts of water as they were stabbed. One particular fight was escalating quite quickly, they’re already shooting lightning at one another. One pulls out a bazooka from literal nowhere and blasts the other out of the sky. It falls and creates a thin fog past the area for a minute and then disappears. Another contender in the sky takes its place and the process continues. “My money’s on the dark grey one with the flail.” Your body tenses. Slowly, you turn your head around out of shock. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” You see a stallion who looks somewhat like yourself but he’s yellow with a green mane. His hair is short and cropped upwards like grass and he’s leaning over the seat behind you like he’s not invading anyone’s personal space. “Could you not be right in my ear when you say that?” He backs off slightly and crosses his hooves as he rests on the top of the seat. “Sure thing. Name’s Meander, I’m a traveler.” You politely introduce yourself and your business. “Flowers huh? Not many ponies like you grow them nowadays, know that? Which means, if you have those there you must be…” “Delivering them, yes,” you say more as-a-matter-of-fact than you intended. “Well, good to see. Mind keeping me company?” Besides a few good ponies and a certain changeling, you weren’t fond of company. But, you did realize the train ride might be a while and having an ally would increase your chances of avoiding the dangers of a train ride. You decide to smile away his imposing optimism and say yes. The conductor’s voice comes over the intercoms once more. “Now departing. Please, fasten your seatbelts and equip the sound-cancelling headphones for those who don’t like today’s musical number. The music sheets can be found in the front pocket of the chair in front of you, please take five minutes to study the lyrics.” You pull out a small white phamplet in the front and open it. Meander hovers over you and looks at it. The musical today was Discordia: Skipping Stones across a Night Sky. Fun.